https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Addictive-Personality-Part-Two&id=10040075
The Addictive Personality Part Two
https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Addictive-Personality-Part-Two&id=10040075
The Addictive Personality, Part One
https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Addictive-Personality,-Part-One&id=10040063
How The Mind/Body Connection Works To Prevent Stress
https://ezinearticles.com/?How-The-Mind/Body-Connection-Works-To-Prevent-Stress&id=9649212
There Are Three Types Of People
Yes, there are millions of types of people but, they all fall into one of three categories (for the sake of this article) - yes people, no people and maybe people. Let me explain.
But before I do, let me be clear - your response to the following will tend to be an automatic quick reaction to what you read. In other words, you will be an example of what the point of the article actually is - you will have a yes, a no or a maybe response to the content of this article and what and how I share it. OK, now that that's out of the way, on to the substance.
Yes, people are not pie in the sky optimists but tend to see the world as half full vs. half empty. They tend to have open minds even about things they are uncomfortable with or know little about. Their first reaction to meeting new people, new ideas, not opportunities and yes even new problems and challenges are - a yes - I can do it, I can figure it out, I will make it work, I won't let it derail me, I won't let it ruin me, I won't give it control over me etc. They are not always easy to persuade or influence just because they are yes people, but they are more open and receptive to new and different stuff, ideas, people, and circumstances.
No people, on the other hand, are just the opposite of yes people. Their first responses to most stuff is a quick - no - I can't, it won't work, it's too expensive, too cheap, too old, too new, he's too arrogant, she's too short etc. get it - these folks are closed off from almost anything and everything that represents new, change, better, different etc.
And then there are maybe people. These folks can go either way - yes or no, but their reaction and responses will generally be governed by a number of factors. Their need for approval, their need to avoid rejection, their self-esteem, their desire to avoid conflict, their desire to contribute to positive outcomes regardless of whether they are based on or grounded in truth, reality or evidence. They have decision phobia when any of the above situations are in play. Yes, they can be yes people, but when it suits the circumstances, environment or outcomes and yes, they can be no people depending on the same issues. A few things to consider and I'll keep them short.
What are the major contributors to which group a person is in?
Your upbringing and early conditioning by parents, caregivers, churches, schools and teachers, relatives, friends and anyone who had temporary or permanent influence over what you learned, what and who you were exposed to and everything you were taught. Most psychologists agree that a person's self-esteem is established at the latest by age 10. So, before you hit your teens you tended to be a yes, no or a maybe person.
Can someone successfully switch groups permanently?
Yes, but it's not easy and takes time, a lot of effort, great patience, focus, new learning, a lot of will and a great deal of desire to change. It's harder for no people to change and it takes more time for a maybe person to change.
Which group tends to be happier and more content?
What do you think? And why - if you were right - It's yes people. Can no or maybe people be happy and content? Of course, but it's not an easy journey for them.
Which group tends to be more successful?
What do you think? And why - if you were right - It's yes people. Can no or maybe people be successful? Of course, but it's not an easy journey for them.
Which group tends to be healthier?
What do you think? And why - if you were right - It's yes people. Can no or maybe people be healthy? Of course, but it's not an easy journey for them. Sensing a pattern here?
Which group tends to live longer?
What do you think? And why - if you were right - It's yes people. Can no or maybe people live long lives? Of course, but it's not an easy journey for them.
There are a lot of other areas we could discuss that specifically address each group and its issues, circumstances, tendencies, behaviors, attitudes etc. but if you are a no person I have lost you by now. If you are a maybe person you are conflicted because of certain things I have said and if you are a yes person you have other things to do and I'm not telling you anything you don't know or have felt or believed in the past and I have just put words to the subject and it's time for you to move on to something else.
https://ezinearticles.com/?There-Are-Three-Types-Of-People&id=9965045
Do You Need An Encourager In Your Life Now?
Do you need an encourager in your life now? Ever needed one in the past? Are you an encourager? Just so we are on the same page if you decide to read this article - an encourager is someone who - guess what - yes, encourages others. But, is there more to the idea of being an encourager? Yes, and I know firsthand what role an encourager can have in our life when we are heading in the wrong direction, hitting bottom or just feel like no one cares.
During my years I have had many occasions when I was in desperate need of encouragement rather than invalidation. And, on some occasions, these people showed up and, on many occasions, I was left alone to navigate life's challenges, trials, adversity and failures alone. I have learned both the hard way and the easy way the importance of having encouragers in our lives when we need them.
How about you - ever had to deal with a life issue alone and no one was in your corner or maybe even no one who cared? I can tell you if you have never been there that these times can be very trying life circumstances that can stretch us to our limits of faith, patience, hope, and belief forcing us to reach deep and find something we didn't even know we had.
What is the role of an encourager?
Encouragers are not in our lives to pave the way forward so that we can aimlessly wander through life's circumstances, lessons and challenges without effort, learning, fear or even guaranteed success. Encouragers are teachers. They are caring and compassionate souls who want to help us learn life's lessons with as little pain and trauma as possible but they are not in our lives to help us avoid what life wants and needs us to learn so we can be productive humans regardless of our roles, responsibilities or opportunities. Encourages can cheer us on, root for us and listen to our concerns and needs but their role is not to remove the learning from our lives that are necessary to master so we can grow and become productive in whatever fashion we have chosen.
Encouragers don't remove the pain or drama from our life, but they help us to find the inner courage, belief, and resilience to handle it, manage it, overcome it and yes learn from it.
Who can be an encourager?
Encouragers can be family, friends, co-workers, customers and even total strangers. I can recall years ago sitting in an airport waiting to board a flight when I was having a conversation with a total stranger. FYI - ever had one of those - where you shared intimate inner fears, dreams, plans, hopes or frustrations with a total stranger who you knew you would never see again? Happens all the time and why? We all need times to share, express and cathart and if we don't have people in our routine lives who can fill this role, we will reach out to anyone and everyone from time to time.
Back to my example - I shared with them the frustration of dealing with a challenging client that I had been working with for years. They listened respectfully as I went on for what seemed forever, and they finally asked a simple question. "Why are you tolerating this behavior and not just cutting the cord and moving on?" This is not what I thought I wanted to hear or felt I needed to hear but it was what they chose to share, and you know what - in reality, it was exactly what I needed to hear.
I could have shared this with a spouse at the time or a few good friends and peers but was unable to admit the frustration to them so I just kept it bottled up inside me to the detriment of other relationships and activities in my life that kept deteriorating due to my lack of ability or willingness to address the issue. Finally, with the help of a total stranger, I was able to move one.
Ever been there? How about family, friends and even neighbors who from time to time are needed to help us weather life's storms?
How can we handle stuff when we don't have an encouraged in our life?
Trials, tribulations, adversity, disappointment, failure, etc. are all a normal part of living. To deny them is to be naive and immature. So, what are we to do when they strike with or without warning? There are dozens of ways to manage life's negative circumstances and while some are more efficient than others many can be a waste of time, energy and even resources.
Enter the encourager, someone who can help you, support you, believe in you, teach you, encourage you and care. No one likes going through adversity alone especially when we are unable to see clearly the resources, solutions or answers that are obvious and right in front of us.
No one wants to feel abandoned or without someone who cares when life's negatives show up on our doorstep. We all need emotional support from time to time regardless of our age, gender, financial status or education.
Without encouragers in our lives during challenging times we will tend to overreact, fall into depression, feel hopeless, make dumb decisions or just isolate ourselves from the world.
Encouragers are an important part of our lives and believe me having gone through many negative life experiences alone I treasure a few of the encouragers I have had during my life. "Thant you - each and every one of you."
What does it take to be an encourager for others?
I'll keep this final question short and to the point. To be an encourager you need some or many of the following traits, characteristics, attitudes, beliefs, values, etc.
-You care about the influence you have on others.
-You believe in the value of the human spirit in others.
-You do not have a selfish bone in your body.
-You always put others ahead of yourself.
- You have a giving spirit.
- You want to leave a legacy of service.
- You have the ability, to be honest even when the message might be perceived as negative.
- You have a healthy self-esteem.
- You don't need the approval of others to feel personal value.
- You are a listener.
- You do not have personal agendas whole encouraging others.
Yes, there are many others, but these are a few of the basics
Got any of these traits? Need them from someone else?
https://ezinearticles.com/?Do-You-Need-An-Encourager-In-Your-Life-Now?&id=10163983
How To Be A Creator Of Circumstances
How to be a creator of circumstances rather than letting things just happen to you, is an idea that enters your mind when you realize that your thoughts somehow shape the reality you experience. Of course, opinions and beliefs influence the world around you, but how they affect you is your choice.
But if the answer is so simple, why isn't everyone doing it? Why aren't most people successful or happy? What is the difference between a creator and a creature of circumstances?
Circumstances are often attributed to things beyond our control. It is a word we often use to prove, describe or explain the situation we are in at present or in the past. But when you think in this way, you then are a creature of what is happening around you. Situations control you when it should be the other way around.
When you want to become successful or get something, you have to believe in your abilities. But you also need to realize that you control your thoughts. Thus you can shape your circumstances. It is the only way I know how to build a life, where you do what you want to do. And it takes knowledge, obligations, awareness, belief, risk, intuition and hard but smart work.
"Successful people are one hundred percent convinced that they are the masters of their own destiny. They are not creatures of circumstances, they create circumstances, and if the circumstances around them suck, they change them." - Jordan Belfort, the Wolf of Wall Street.
Creature of Circumstances
Just look at the present circumstances in your life, which are in control and which are you directing? When you search deep enough, you may find that while many are a result of the habits and choices you made over the years. Others are the consequence of other people's beliefs, preferences, and decisions.
So, how they affect, touch and impact you are your decision. Let's say that you had a bad experience with a cat when you were younger. And so, it creates a fear which makes you decide never to touch or get close to cats again. Believe me when I tell you that any animal sense the fear you have of them, and it reinforces it by their reaction when they are close to you.
As a result, you avoid cats and refuse to get near them. In this way, it also makes your social life tricky as you have a hard time visiting friends who have cats. You may even avoid certain places or cross the street as soon as you see one. In this instance, you became a creature of circumstances because your lousy experience made you a slave to a habit which has created different situations for you.
Two Types of People - Creator and Creature
Therefore, in this world, there are only two kinds of persons:
- People who are a creator of circumstances and turn everything they want into reality.
- The rest who are creatures of circumstances which is no other than 95% of the population and gets little to nothing.
Do you really want to be known as the person, who settles, goes through life barely making it, being satisfied with what you get and accepting what happens? Or do you want to be great and successful, and have a legacy and a reputation as someone who is a warrior in life?
Well, personally, I am a person who wants to make an impact and is a creator of his own world. So, you have to be an architect that creates his own life and designs it, despite all obstacles. You should strive to be a creator of circumstances instead of a creature of it. I know, I know- easier said than done. But do you have a better choice in mind?
How to Be a Creator of Circumstances
In the past, I was at times a creature to some of the circumstances life offered me. And I know you have to or still do. It is no fun at all as one grows resentful. But in the times where I won, I realize I created and controlled all of my circumstances. So how can you go from a creature to a creator?
First of all, if you change your thoughts, you will begin to alter your circumstances. Most people react to conditions or situations thinking that they have no control over them. It is true to some degree! There are various things that you cannot control. Stuff like who your relatives are or specific physical features you have.
But rather than letting the circumstances mold you, you have to be the one who changes the conditions of life that surround you. You can think, analyze and figure out whether you want to accept the situation or replace it. So, you are the creator of your circumstances, even if you do like it or don't.
Habits and Circumstances
In fact, most of your circumstances are a result your choices and decisions in life. If you take the time to search the source or cause of the reason you are in your situation, you might find out that you chose or decided what brought you there. But again, you must realize that unconscious habits have a significant role to play in the circumstances you create for yourself.
Therefore, these habits reinforce and support your beliefs, views, and principles. And it becomes even harder to change. Deep-rooted habits and circumstances are somehow intertwined. So you have to work on your inner self to change your outer world. You have to replace some habits with better ones.
However, too many people accept the status quo and refuse to go against the flow, out of fear. Everyone wants change, but not many want to change. When you look at the world around you, you can see what I am talking about here. To be a creator of circumstances, you have to go against the flow.
Creators Change the World
What happens when people who have enough do something about it? They change the world. I never settled very often in my life, and when I did, I rebelled against it after a while. Life is not about giving in but about fighting back.
On the other hand, so many people use circumstances to justify or excuse why they are the way they are. It is much easier to blame someone or something for the bad that happens or for the failures than to look within.
So, start to be honest with yourself. Ask yourself what the worst thing that could happen, if you become the creator of your circumstances, is. Focus on the best-case scenario instead of looking at the worst one. Great things happen to those who believe and take action.
Most of the time, the probability of success is on your side. Visualize what you want. Take action every day. Build momentum. The choice is yours but remember; it is better to be a creator of circumstances than to be a creature of situations which dictate your life.
https://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Be-A-Creator-Of-Circumstances&id=9881233
Does My Mentality Limit My Success
As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he - Proverbs 23:7
Some have said success is a mental thing. To the extent that it is virtually impossible to be a real success with a failure mentality that is true. But just how important is mentality to success? Can you really "Think and Grow Rich" like Napoleon Hill wrote in his world-famous book?
It is impossible to separate what we are in our core from what we believe about ourselves. We may say things that are different than what we believe but we cannot think things that are different than our beliefs. If you believe you can, you can; if you believe you can't, you can't. What you believe you will achieve in this lifetime.
Anytime a person sets out on a journey to become successful in any endeavor the first thing they must accept is the dream they have about being a success. They think they can do something; they imagine themselves doing it and soon their actions reflect what they have been thinking all along. Actions follow thought and when it comes to becoming a success actions follow intentional thought.
Success starts with a dream. We see in our minds eye an event or circumstance that involves what we are hoping for. I remember as a young man wanting to own a home. Didn't think it was possible. Then the building we were living in went up for sale and I was going to have to move soon. That prompted me to stop and consider what purchasing a home would entail. When I looked at the programs available for first time homebuyers, the cash involved (which I could have to close the deal) and the process it would take. I went over the idea with my wife and she jumped on board.
The process of (1) never thought about it (2) now I am thinking about it (3) how do I make this dream a reality is the thought process people who are now successful had to go through. Every great project begins with a dream. If you can see it, you can have it. But when it's out of mind it will remain out of sight. The goal of becoming successful is to utilize the concepts of visualization, repetition and faith in your ability to accomplish anything you set your mind to do.
It's not the man with skills or intellect or experience that ultimately wins; it's the man who thinks he can, regardless of the obstacles and difficulties he must endure to get there.
https://ezinearticles.com/?Does-My-Mentality-Limit-My-Success&id=10357978





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