Dare to Be Average

Most of us are always trying to be the best that we can be. Others are always trying to be perfect. But can we be perfect, given our frail human nature? Is it even healthy to try and be perfect or are we aiming for an impossibly high ideal that won't take us anywhere anyways?

Perfection is a plague for all of us. Advertisers are always encouraging us to buy their products because we are not good enough just as we are. But is this really true? Do we have to fall prey to such undermining negative attitudes which will make us feel worse about ourselves?

I believe that we must strive to get off the perfection ban wagon and become who we were meant to be when we were born, perfect and without blemish. However, to do so, we must become more aware of all the negative messages that are hurled against us by our culture and especially advertisers.

However, with practise and self-awareness, it is possible for us to like, and perhaps even love, every aspect of ourselves. We are not only good enough just as we are. We are great just as we are. We don't need any gimmicks to be perfect. That is something that we don't believe, regardless of who tells us so.

What does it mean to be average? Well, here are a few things that it does mean:

• Accepting ourselves in our own skins.

• Accepting our flaws, be they character flaws or physical disabilities.

• Acknowledging where we are, without worrying about anything else.

• Not comparing ourselves to others because it is a waste of time, energy and inevitably it can make your life miserable.

• Honouring who you are right now, without worrying about anything else.

• Becoming more aware of what the media is telling us to be and to avoid being those things.

• Loving ourselves and knowing deep in our hearts that we are unique just as we are.

• Not wanting to be anyone that we are not but celebrating who we are now.

• Celebrating our unique talents, because we have a lot of them.

• Realizing that we are all average, and we can all be great by how we lead our lives.

• Living joyfully in the present moment, celebrating all the little and not so little experiences in our lives.

• Living a more aware life one that is grounded in the present.

By accepting where you are in life and daring to be the best version of who you are now, you can live the best life that possible.

People who exude this kind of self-confidence look pretty perfect. They hold their heads up high and they celebrate this moment right now because it is the very moment where they are meant to live and be their best version of ordinary. Are you ready to be average?

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Cake in a Cup = Creative Perfection

Most of the creative people I know think they are perfectionists, but are actually not perfect at all; attention to detail is there, and they don't like to leave a task until it is done to their liking, but they are always open and creative in their approach. Put ten of them in a room, and you will not be able to hear yourself think, as they loudly give you more than ten different solutions to the same problem.

Some people say you are born to be creative, but I wonder if it is also a bit like a muscle; the more you use it, the more it works. Of course, we all have different strengths, and while being artistic might be in someone's DNA, creativity might be something we can all learn to embrace, nurture, and have fun with.

Which brings me back to perfection. The other day, I read a really great theory; that creativity begins with letting go of having to do everything perfectly, and the willingness to discover other options.

What they suggested was so simple, that I wanted to share it with you...

Practice making a recipe without having all the ingredients. Whether it is a meal or a cake, go ahead and turn the oven on, knowing full well that you are not prepared.

Don't dismiss Chicken Tarragon because you have no tarragon. (I don't like tarragon anyway). Substitute thyme, or whatever is in your cupboard or your garden. If you don't have any herbs, make it anyway, add whatever you feel like, and see what happens.

The same with a cake. Yes, they say it is a science, but I often use a lot less sugar, and I play with the proportions and flavor, until the raw batter looks (and tastes) good to me. What is the worst that can happen? It's still cake. Add a dollop of cream, or your favorite ice cream, and it's still a dessert that you didn't have on your plate a couple of hours ago.

The joy of this is, playing with a recipe forces you to stretch that creative muscle, and to see that there are always other options around.

After doing this a few times, you will start to look at everything else a little differently; there will automatically be more solutions to your problems, tarragon will disappear from your shopping list, and you will start to see the world in a far more interesting (creative) way...

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Turning Difficulty Into Purpose

DIFFICULTY has no purpose in our lives until it becomes a purpose. Think about it. Difficulty will otherwise cause us to be frustrated and miserable if we don't agree to be motivated by it.

The test comes when we're next tempted to lose our cool. Not that turning difficulty into purpose is anything about perfection; it certainly can be about progress.

This is about the gospel power latent in our everyday lives. By latent I mean dormant. It remains latent as long as we go back to our habitual responses of frustration and resentment in response to difficulty. But this latent gospel power is unleashed with spectacular effectiveness when we face our difficulty and make it our purpose; to accept our life, especially the ugly bits.

This is centrally about accepting the lives we've been given. It's about debunking the silent wishes to have another life, or another person's life.

It's about making the most of the life we have - making our purpose to live our lives for the quest of our purpose.

The moment we begin to truly accept the life we have, including what perplexes us, we enter chaos with a newfound peace. We no longer need to resolve anything unless we resolve to make situations better because we can.

This is a wisdom we can apply with great effect to any facet of our lives.

As we accept a thing we cannot change, suddenly there is gospel power in our lives to live with the conundrum. And often the next step is God's healing grace, as the miracle of acceptance falls over us. All for a life that turned its difficulty into its very purpose.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Turning-Difficulty-Into-Purpose&id=9755226

The Wrong Side Of The Right Plan

Nothing has to go to plan for us all to benefit from what happens. That is what I mean by the title: The wrong side of the right plan. We all seem to want absolute perfection, but with perfection comes boredom and never discovering anything new or exciting. The wrong side of the right plan is also quitting without looking at alternatives just because something does not go "perfectly" or in an expected way. Expand your horizons and realities to include wide arrays instead of the narrow and ideal plans working, and things will genuinely be better than if you took the "narrow view of things".

I admit, plans work to the extent that we work the plans. But to expect a perfect result every time is genuinely neurotic at the most and frustrating at the very least.

I used to wonder what would happen if we had perfect lives without problems from the start, sometimes I would even go into a reverie and wonder about that. Then, I saw movie stars, news reporters with high salaries and people with "perfect lives" by the "normal standard" faking it, and having breakdowns, divorces and unhappiness. I did not wonder why, I could only think to myself, if life is not interesting, we make it interesting by creating neurotic imperfections. So, I came to a creative conclusion, only earned perfection or a peaceful after strenuous work or horrible storms is valid to people, because it is earned and not given. Think about what I mean by "if life is not interesting, we make it interesting". Reality is a game of give and take right? Full of obstacles and rewards after the obstacles. If life was just smooth sailing, we would wonder what we are here for.

The real winner starts out behind in some ways or all ways. They end up ahead because they accept the mantle of earning their way, building their strength, and making it all really interesting. The real loser starts out ahead without a seeming problem, but they get lazy and sometimes pathetic, because they feel they have such an advantage or advantages. It is like the classic story of "The Tortoise and The Hare", and how it always ends with the tortoise winning what they earned, while that lazy and advantaged "with speed" tricky rabbit with all "the advantages" always loses due to overconfidence. Being a real winner is like being a strong blacksmith, at first the blacksmith cannot lift the hammer, but at the end he creates swords and shapes metal with that same hammer through natural resistance and natural strength created by their efforts. Three last words: Think about it.

https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Wrong-Side-Of-The-Right-Plan&id=8237045

Let's Not Be the 80% Who Fail

Oh No! Is it really that time of year already?

You know... resolutions time!

That time of year where we must yank ourselves up by our own bootstraps, shake off the dust of the year left behind, and get serious.

But, get serious about what? Okay, so yes, it's been weeks, if not months of over indulging, over eating, over imbibing, and excess. Most likely it began with all that Halloween candy which led right into Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years Eve!

Now, here I stand, in the new year wondering where those extra pounds came from, why I feel so tired, and YOWZA, how did my credit card balance get so high?!

My life's a mess - oh, and sheesh, one look around and so is my home!

Yep! It's time to get control of things and stop kidding myself. But, gosh, the list is a long one... where, oh where, do I begin?

Eat better?

Exercise more?

Spend less?

Save more?

Better self care?

Read more?

Cut down on smoking / alcohol?

Get organized and declutter?

Learn a new skill?

Find a better job?

Find true love?

It seems only fitting, doesn't it, that with the new year, there needs to be a new me, too?!

And, with the flip of the calendar, from one month to the next, somehow I must get myself to perfection. Okay, maybe not perfection, but at least closer to healthy, prosperous, organized, and out of debt.

So, I'll make a list, add affirmations to that list to insure success. Set my intentions clearly, and, oh yes, set my clock earlier, too, to insure I get up and get started.

Toss out all those cookies, candies, and half opened bottles of booze, and make a long grocery list of healthy foods to buy.

Sit down and put together a smart financial plan for the year. Cut up my credit cards so I stop using them - oh, but wait a minute, I might need those for emergencies. Let's not get too hasty.

Go to the store and buy storage bins and shelves so as to get all that clutter off the floor and organized in some manner.

Surely this is doable, isn't it?

But, let's get real. For the majority of us, this approach is a set up for failure - Massive failure. And, along with that failure is any chance that something truly important to you could happen.

So, let's get real. Who wants to be part of the statistic that says... 80 percent of people don't even make it to the end of March before going back to their old ways.

Not me. No thank you!

How about we take the sage guidance from someone who knows how we humans tick. After all, this guy has spent a lifetime studying why we succeed, and why we fail. He's known for his critical examination and frequent debunking of unusual phenomena and has studied the principles of good and bad luck.

Here's what he suggests is the best approach to making, keeping and achieving those much desired resolutions.

Prof Wiseman's top 10 tips to achieving your New Year's resolution:

Only make one resolution

Don't wait until New Year's Eve to set your goal

Don't attempt previously failed resolutions

Don't base your goal on what everyone else is doing

Break your goal into a series of time-based steps

Tell your friends and family what you're aiming tor

Regularly remind yourself of the benefits

Give yourself small rewards for achieving each step

Make your plans and your progress concrete by writing them down

Expect to have small set-backs, and don't make those a reason to give up altogether

And, let me add a bonus tip - Let's call it Joan's sage guidance from years of doing it wrong - MAKE A DECISION, NOT A RESOLUTION.

Anything you wish to achieve must begin with that... A decision.

Make a DECISION, NOT a RESOLUTION

One Resolution at a time

Let's work on that together

Single session - 1 hour

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Create the vision

Plan of action in writing

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Message From the Universe: Abundance Is Right Around the Corner!

"The funny thing is that once you know you're actually "good to financially coast" for the rest of your days, as if on one very long vacation, coasting becomes the last thing you'd ever want to do.

And happily, of all the new things you'd get busy doing with your newfound abundance, there's not a one of them you can't at least begin or prepare to begin, right now.

See you at the bank, 

The Universe"

Abundance is ONLY available in the eye of the beholder. Abundance can mean anything and everything. We all see things differently, so abundance for you can be health while for someone else it can be money. Whatever it is for you, look at it and feel that you are already experiencing this wealth. Even if you are not drowning in a mountain of money, feel like you are and you will believe that it is happening. I am not saying to be delusional at all, but take actions towards your visual abundance. Look into the Universe and be clear to what you want. You have to be concise, direct and explain with your thoughts the different ways that you will use to reach your dream. The Universe will listen, do not worry about that at all. Be patient and everything will come to fruition.

There is so much out in the Universe to explore and so many other adventures are waiting on you to experience. Learn to go with the flow, do not expect perfection with everything you do. Keep moving forward, no matter what happens. You don't need to have the planets align the right way for you to take action. We always go with the mantra: "I will do this ONLY when I have this", "Or will get a new job when I finish school" and so on and so forth. Just do it like Microsoft. Do you think they wait for their OS to work glitch free before they launch it out to the public? Guess what? You are their testers. That is what their benefit. Why will they pay testers high money when they have YOU, their customers. You buy the product and experience tons of glitches to finally report it to the Microsoft team. It's free labor to them. Best deal on Earth. So when you have something in mind, just go for it and deal with the obstacles, or you will end up accomplishing absolutely nothing in life.

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Increase Your Chances For Personal Success

Success, as most other things in the world, is a subjective thing. Two people may be in the exact same situation, say financially, but one of them may deem themselves successful while the other one may think of themselves as a financial failure. In fact, you may not consider someone to be financially successful and yet that person may think they are super successful. Likewise if someone does seem to you financially successful, it doesn't mean that this person has the same experience of themselves. And as we all know, how you feel about your life is what matters, not how other people think you should feel.

So now the question is: What do people who think of themselves as successful have that sets them apart from the ones that see themselves as a failure? Is it self-esteem? Is it confidence? Or could it be perhaps optimism? Are they sometimes delusional? Or do they simply have low expectations of themselves?

In my view, the perception of personal success is neither an expression of stupidity nor of some kind of limitless self-belief. Rather, personal success is a product of self-love.

Practicing deep self-love works on several fronts to guarantee your personal success. Firstly, it transforms your experience of who you actually are. And who you are is a divine being, perfection in all sorts of imperfect forms and shapes. As a result, your confidence and self-esteem go up, you become more optimistic and you start celebrating not only the big achievements but life in general. You see yourself as a success. Secondly, practicing self-love sends out a constant message to the universe: "I am worth it, please award me". And the Universe responds accordingly. You start attracting experiences and manifest achievements that reflect your worthiness.

Now, is the road to self-love a difficult one? It is, if you say so. But it doesn't have to be. Start small by saying "I love myself". No matter how fake it sounds, be consistent with it and the message will eventually get through to your core. If you want to take the short-cut, choose a therapy that works directly on the subconscious. And get this: experiencing self-love is not only going to help you feel successful; it will also help you experience true love for another human being. You can't love someone else if you don't love yourself first. Likewise, you can't be loved by other people until you can love yourself. So don't think that self-love is a selfish thing. Quite the contrary - learning to love yourself is actually the most altruistic act you could perform. If we all cultivate self-love, we will all be capable of loving others and feeling successful in life at the same time.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Increase-Your-Chances-For-Personal-Success&id=9839827

Be Better Than Who You Were Yesterday

Early on in life, I discovered that you only need to try to be better than who you were yesterday and not compare yourself to anyone. But, at times, I still do, like any human being. This world is in constant flux and change. And yet, most people are comparing rather than focusing on themselves.

A ton of questions might run through your mind right now. Questions like "Why do I need to compare myself to others? How is he more successful than I am? Why am I not as lucky?"

If you are wondering; it can be out of jealousy, greed, desire, or more. It might be easy to say, but you should not envy anyone. The only person you should try to be envious of and be better than, is the person you were yesterday. If you can do this, then you become better with each day that passes.

And yes, it would be a lie if I told you that the road to being greater is easy as you try to live better each day. The truth is that it won't be easy at all. Each day is filled with its barriers and challenges, but it is also full of many different opportunities.

Try to Be Better 

As you try to be better than whom you were yesterday, you will begin to realize, appreciate and enjoy the gifts and benefits life has in store for you. And you may even start to discover various possibilities in each given challenge. So, be better than who you were yesterday, even if it happens only via one percent each day, week or month.

What I mean is that even if you make mistakes, it is your ability not to allow your errors to influence or control you. It is what makes you who you are. And if there is one thing I learned time and time again is to be better than who I was yesterday.

Therefore, if you do not do something right or you know you made a blunder for one reason or the other, do not give those mistakes power. I know that we are all going through this. So, do not let the errors you make rule your life, learn from them, move on and do not judge you or what you can do.

Be More than Yesterday 

Believe it or not, the power you acquired through all of your experiences can help you avoid many costly mistakes. You just have to learn, work, live and strive to be better than the person you were yesterday. I am not telling you to try to reach perfection but only that you do not have to live your life in the same way if you are unsatisfied with it.

After all, you have the power to make any change your heart desires. And if you make a mistake, do not blame yourself, just pick yourself up, dust away from the negative thoughts that bring you down and work at becoming a better person than who you were the day before.

If you do not believe you are capable of it, just imagine for an instant, that one day you are doing better. Would not that make you feel like some renewed confidence is soaring through you? And is not that a better use of your time than some negative feelings? By thinking that way, you will move forward and grow to be a remarkable person.

How to Be Better than Before 

Now, you are your competition; so compete only with yourself. Successful people always follow and practice this. Those individuals become successful by not slacking off and waiting for luck to come along. They instead create it! And they work hard and persist in their vision each day.

Moreover, people who are successful do not let barriers and challenges stop them from achieving their objectives. Instead, they use these encounters to make them stronger by learning from them. They look for problems to solve while others purely try to avoid problems.

Successful people also hone their skills and talent to be better than they were yesterday. They do not stop to compare themselves with others. Why? The reason is that they consider it a waste of their valuable time gone in smoke which they can instead use working on their projects.

Strive to Get Better 

Learn to strive to get better for you, and not by comparing what others do. They can be an inspiration but do not let bitterness take over by looking at what you do not have yet. Instead, appreciate the things you have right now, no matter how little, and focus on how you can make them better one day at a time.

Therefore, do not wonder if you are at the top yet, push to be better than yesterday. And I tell you, it won't be long before you become the inspiration for others to improve and work harder. Work hard. Get your mind involved in every other aspect of your life.

And yes, sometimes, errors are bound to happen but never let them define who you are. Do not be stuck in the past. Some mistakes are costly due to lack of knowledge, selfishness, pride, stupidity or foolishness. Just try to correct them if you can. And if you cannot do anything about it, learn, let go and look forward to the next opportunity by not making the same blunder again.

A Brief Recap to Be Better 

So here is a brief recap of the tips to be better than who you were yesterday.

• Work on yourself each day to improve.
• Never compare yourself to others.
• Stop being envious of other people.
• Be more present in your own life.
• Let go of the past.
• Learn from your mistakes and move on.
• Look forward to other opportunities.
• Let successful people be an inspiration to you.
• Avoid making the same mistakes again.
• Believe in your capacity to be better.
• Enjoy your victories, no matter how small.
• Rule number one for success: Belief in yourself.

You hone yourself that much. Now, go ahead and challenge yourself, and practice by being the best and success will follow. So always strive to be better than you were yesterday!

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Find Out Why You Are So Afraid Of Making Mistakes Today

Why Are You So Afraid of Making a Mistake?

Growing up, every adult you encounter is there to tell you: "Don't Do this" and "Don't Do that".

We get smacked for doing what grown-ups feel is "wrong". Constantly striving to "be good" and win their approval. But somewhere along the line, we forget something very important. We can only learn from making mistakes... many, many mistakes.

Take learning piano for instance. How can you possibly learn to play a new piece, if you haven't played it dozens of times, with countless errors in the process? Some pieces may take 20 mistakes to get it right, others may take hundreds of wrong notes before absolute perfection.

You cannot learn anything new until you stop being afraid of getting it wrong.

You can't grow as a human being if you are not constantly learning and pushing yourself. How do you know what you are capable of, if you don't try anything at all? How do you know if you can cook, or paint, or write beautiful poetry if you never give it a go? You are going to make lots of meals that taste terrible... I know, I've done that myself. Many paintings will look awful until you get the exact look that you want.

Nothing in this life is achieved on the first go. Everything you admire has taken years of practice. Years of making mistakes and getting it wrong, before making it great. You don't need to have exceptional talent at something to be the best at it.

People that are exceptional at anything are no less ordinary or extraordinary than you and I.

The truth is that people who have become brilliant at anything have spent countless hours practicing and making many, many mistakes in order to learn how to do it perfectly. Tennis players have hit that tennis ball with their rackets, thousands of times in order to master this skill. Musicians have spent thousands of hours practicing their instrument over and over again so that they can achieve the beautiful pieces that you hear that sound flawless.

Dancers have practiced their steps hundreds of times and fallen over many times in order to provide a breathtaking performance. We tend to believe that these people are incredibly gifted and talented beyond our imaginations, but the truth is that they are no less talented or gifted than you. They have just put in the time and put in the effort and have never, ever given up. They are not afraid of mistakes and they understand that failing over and over again, is the only way to achieve success.

The people who are the best at what they do are not necessarily the most gifted. They are simply the ones that never quit, no matter what gets in their way. Everything you admire in them has always been inside of you if only you would stop being afraid of making mistakes.

So What Are You Waiting For? Go Learn Something NEW!

http://ezinearticles.com/?Find-Out-Why-You-Are-So-Afraid-Of-Making-Mistakes-Today&id=9811560

Why the Idea of "Perfection" Is BS

How many times have you looked at the cover of any men's magazine and thought, "My God, Carmen Electra's just perfect!" - only to immediately deem her out of your league? (Substitute for any model of your choice, if you will.)

Or, if you're a girl, that your body could never be anywhere near as perfect?

I know, right?

Perfection is, pretty much by definition, something unattainable. So why do people keep striving for it?

While everyone may not literally be striving for perfection, we sure do tend to act like it's a real thing, - and then ultimately feel bad about how it's beyond our reach.

I'm willing to bet that 100% of anyone reading this has, at some point in their lives, compared themselves or something they did to someone or something else that they considered perfectly flawless, only, then, to feel imperfect - and, in turn, inferior.

To a certain extent, this is what made me quit playing the guitar. I thought that I could never possibly be as outerwordly gifted as Dimebag Darrell. - And when I tried pushing myself towards his levels of speed, all I got was beginning signs of tenosynovitis!

When we do this to ourselves, we're unconsciously being self-destructive. By holding ourselves to preposterously unfair standards, we fixate ourselves in a sense of inferiority. We get used to thinking of ourselves as being of lesser worth.

What makes this type of thought and behavior downright dangerous is that it's self-affirming: The lesser we think of ourselves, the more we will tend to see perfection anywhere but ourselves, thereby effectively downward-spiraling deeper still into low self-esteem and depression.

"Well, damn. Then what's the good news?" Glad you asked:

The notion of perfection - flawlessness; precise accuracy etc. - doesn't even apply to our daily lives!

Unless you're dealing with geometry or mathematical concepts (even which, for all intents and purposes, are merely principal human constructions), there is no such thing as "perfection".

Now say it with me:

THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS "PERFECTION"!

One man's masterpiece is another man's garbage. Even my favorite books, movies, and albums could be improved upon one way or another. Hell, even Carmen Electra probably has some sort of cosmetic flaw or irregularity (of which I wish to remain blissfully unaware).

By and large, "perfection" is an infinity-multiplied notion of one or more positive qualities. - An idealized matter of personal opinion. Which, for the record, does not equal "truth".

However, that doesn't mean that the idea of perfection is utterly useless. On the contrary, we can use perfection as a means of motivation.

When used right, perfection should be considered nothing but a principal ideal to pursue - not to ultimately attain. If we aim for perfection, we can't help but improve a little all the time. It's when we expect perfection that we set ourselves up for failure.

As the saying goes, "Strive for progress, not perfection". Or, as another saying goes, "Aim for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars".

(Whichever you prefer).

Or, as my personal favorite goes:

I say never be complete. I say stop being perfect. I say let's evolve.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Why-the-Idea-of-Perfection-Is-BS&id=9684465

7 Ways to Find Inner Happiness

Happiness is on the list of words that we don't understand well. We spend our entire lives searching for this intangible thing. We think that we can get happiness if we get this or that. However, the ancient yoga experts are of the opinion that we can get real happiness only if we stop thinking about getting material stuff. What we should do is get the lasting joy that lies within us. Given below are some of the simple ways of getting happiness.

Take it easy

In difficult times, such as illness or loss, we tend to lose our humor and get involved with negative thoughts. What you need to do is not take yourself too serious. Doing so will bring you lightness and you will be able to cope with the difficult circumstances more easily.

Illness, loss and suffering

You should not identify yourself with loss, illness or suffering. Some people realized how they had been making the mistake of identifying themselves as patients. Actually, you may not want to identify yourself with the issues. This will help you know who you actually are and you will be able to shine.

Be yourself

It's perfectly fine to be you. Don't think that you are imperfect, falling apart, unable to cope, hopeless or a mess. If you want true perfection, what you need to do is accept yourself with all your imperfections. And it includes all of what you like or dislike. As a matter of fact, this is the best way of preventing yourself from struggling.

Make friends with yourself

You should make friends with yourself. As a matter of fact, this is the relationship that will stand the test of time for you. You can be the best friend to yourself. Therefore, beating yourself up emotionally is not a good idea.

Don't repress your feelings

When you are going through difficult times, it may be easy for you to suppress or deny your feelings. However, if you can honor what you feel, you will get a bit closer to the real happiness. The greatest gift is to acknowledge and make friends with yourself by accepting everything that you may have.

Forgive yourself

Let's agree that we all make mistakes. Instead of hating yourself, you should learn to forgive yourself. What you need to do is forgive yourself whenever you feel angry, upset or overly emotional. Learn to take the shape or guilt and don't punish yourself. Self-forgiveness is something that can help you gain the inner peace.

Meditate

Lots of research studies have done in order to demonstrate how meditation can change your happiness and contentment by triggering the factor called "feel-good". If you have never meditated before, we suggest that you try it now. Put your hesitation aside and give it a go.

So, these are 7 simple ways of getting inner happiness. If you have been going through difficult circumstances and you have been finding it hard to find inner peace, we suggest that you try out these tips.

http://ezinearticles.com/?7-Ways-to-Find-Inner-Happiness&id=9733512

Personal Kingdoms Can Crumble

Everyone feels that they are the ruler of their own little world -apart from everyone else. We decide, we act, and we make changes we feel are necessary. It is definitely a "high" because in our own personal planet, no one will contradict us, turn against us, and even try to take over our private domain. We are ruler, king, emperor, but maybe if we look in a mirror - we don't have any "clothes" as we parade in front of the world in our mind's superiority.

By the time we reach maturity, we are the combination of literally thousands of "little pieces" that have been thrown into the mix of who we are. Even without our knowledge, many circumstances, individuals, tragedies, and blessings have all become part of the formula of what we are at any given moment. Maybe we are truly proud of everything we have become, or maybe, like the majority of the world, realize that there must be some "tweaking" done so that the castle we have built fits the ego and attitude we have fostered.

In today's psychological world "everyone is great", and perfection has been attained and realized. True, if you are looking at the confines of your "little world". Think for just a moment - why do we take note of imperfections and flaws of everyone we know, meet, and engage with. Being honest with ourselves, have we ever met a person who has the perfection we have achieved? Probably not - but here is the crunch in the box of cereal. Others are doing the exact same research and coming up with the very same results as they check us out.

Perfection is truly overrated. If we are perfect then we don't need to grow or achieve or even experience anything else - because we have reached the "top" of the heap and we have no stragglers behind us. Then what do we plan to do with the rest of our lives - rest on our laurels, success, or expert status? Truthfully - boring comes to mind very quickly. If we are so perfect that we don't believe we have to learn anything, experiment with ideas, or even try different strategies then only boredom in the kingdom exists. This, however, can be altered so that we enjoy life as it is meant to be - not in total perfection but in reality. Everyone will pass on from mortal life never knowing everything, experiencing every-thing, meeting everyone, or even dreaming all the possibilities that exist in the atmosphere around our little personal world. Perfection is a goal but it is never an achievement - our very own imagination and creativity are set into motion to make sure that we strive for but never attain total perfection and until we realize this "human" trait, we will find only discontent, unhappiness, and solitude.

Every morning is a new beginning - but only if we open up the shades and tell the world that we are ready and able to see the untapped, the never tried, and the unexpected. We can make sure we are ready, willing and able to grab the horns of the "unknown" and see if it can be con-quered, if its components can add to the spice cabinet of our interests and enjoyment. If, however, we lounge in our belief that we are "perfect" then we might as well go back to bed and rest a bit more because carrying the torch of perfection each and every day is draining the energy out of us so that we will only languish away and our world of perceived perfection will deflate. No one knows how much time they have been given so why waste even a moment on falsehoods we have fed ourselves - instead lets taste the new delights that the world is just bursting with and then maybe when our hourglass runs out of sand we can rest with the words "job well done".

http://ezinearticles.com/?Personal-Kingdoms-Can-Crumble&id=9363066

Darling You're Not Messed Up, You're Just Misinformed! (By Jentana Dabbs)

Often times I have clients come to me and ask me to fix them. They say that they are "messed up." I tell them that they're not mess up, they're just miss informed about themselves, the way they should be living, what they should be doing and most of all they are misinformed about what "normal" really is!

The definition of normal

According to the dictionary, the definition of normal is conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural.

The problem with the word "normal" is that there are so many mixed signals about what "normal" really is, based on our circle of influences, what our parents tell us, what schools tell us, what we see on TV, hear on the news and what we see on Social Media.

The cycle of madness

Most people are so caught up in wanting to be told what is normal, that they get caught up in this cycle of madness, trying to find it, have someone tell them what normal is and to just be able to fit in.

The Big Fear

The big fear for many people out there is the fear of rejection. They fear that if they are not what they perceive or are trying to perceive as normal, they won't fit in and they will be rejected, tossed aside and possibly die, so there is a lot of attachment to becoming normal. But again, what is normal really?

The social media crap trap

One of newest and now largest contributors to feeling messed up (next to our parents) is social media. Yes, those wonderful photos and posts that are posted everywhere for all the world to see of happy people, couples in love, success, money, travel, friendships, great food, PERFECTION, everything looks perfect and happy not a care in the world, no problems, these people aren't messed up, so why are you all messed up!

The Truth

They are just photos and posts, most of these people are just as messed up as you! (See you are normal after all! ) The real truth is, that "normal" has so many different perceptions, beliefs and opinions that you really can't judge your actions, character, your life and your happiness based on what someone else says.

So here are 3 ways to get better informed about yourself

1. Catch yourself every time you find yourself getting envious of others on Facebook, Instagram or anything else and allow those emotions to pass. Remember that those people have their own problems that you don't know about as well.

2. Learn more about who you are and what your biggest strengths are by diving into quizzes and studies about your brain type, organizational style, personality type and so on. You might find that the reason why you keep getting fired from office jobs is because you are a creative person and office jobs don't work for you, regardless of how hard you try.

3. Get some support from a qualified person to help rebuild your self-esteem and find groups of like minded people to support you as well. You've gone a long time believing that you were messed up, so now its going to take some work to reverse that old belief and change your perception about yourself, but with a little work and the right support, you may just start believing that it's everyone else who is messed up and not you!

http://ezinearticles.com/?Darling-Youre-Not-Messed-Up,-Youre-Just-Misinformed!&id=9484367

9 Tips to Stop Being So Easily Annoyed And Offended

Some people never appear to be angered by anything. Others are so delicate that they're almost upset by the way someone takes a breath. Being conveniently upset is often triggered by an unrealistic need for perfection or a vulnerable vanity. That's excellent news! It indicates that you're the cause of your feelings. You have the power to alter your reactions.

Free yourself from really feeling annoyed:

1. Think positive intentions. Not everyone is a master wordsmith. Some people have a flair of claiming things the wrong way. Until you're specific, think that the possible transgressor had the most effective of objectives, yet inadequate technique. Concentrate on the motif of the remark.

Assumptions could trigger all sorts of obstacles. Stay clear of thinking the most awful up until you have proof to support those ideas.

2. Take into consideration that they could be right. Nobody prefers to be slammed, yet most of us deserve it at times. No one is perfect.

3. Ask yourself why you really feel angered in the first place. What's the reason? If you're annoyed that your buddy is 20 mins late, just what exactly is the source of your stress? Is it the inconvenience? The idea that your pal does not respect your time? Your idea that responsible individuals are prompt, and you do not like irresponsible people?

You could be the source of your very own irritation. The more convinced you are that things need to be a certain way, the more often you'll be dissatisfied.

4. Allow others to be themselves. No one is wandering the Earth trying to make you miserable. Every person is living their life in their very own way.

Sometimes, our lives converge, and also the opportunity for somebody to be dissatisfied exists. Some individuals might be too brusque, superficial, or cheap for your preferences, However they may likewise might not be thrilled with you.

Provide everyone the space they need to operate in their own manner. You'll obtain much more acceptance if you provide much more acceptance.

5. Decide not to be offended. You could pick your reaction to any situation. You don't need to end up being dismayed and upset when somebody does or states something you don't like. You could opt to neglect the scenario and just carry on. You can decide to consider the action or comment from various points of view.

6. Be flexible. The longer you hold onto adverse feelings, the longer you're harming your own. Forgive others so you can move on with your life.

7. Approve yourself. Often times, we're angered since we do not like the truth.

No one wishes to be called fat, lazy, short, or impatient. Yet several of us fall into one or more of these categories. We simply do not like to be reminded of the fact! Accept your absence of perfection and you won't be so effortlessly upset.

8. Develop your self-confidence. Research studies show that those most quickly angered typically have reduced levels of self-esteem. When you feel much better about yourself, you will not be so quickly troubled by the words and also habits of others.

9. Recognize exactly how you're harming yourself by being overly sensitive. If you're quickly upset, you're not very happy in general. It just isn't feasible. When you understand just how much your sensitivity is hurting you, it will be easier to transform. Exactly how has being upset hurt you in the past?

An old African proverb says, "If there is no enemy within, the enemy outside can do us no harm." The ability to appreciate and also approve of yourself identifies how conveniently you're upset. When you can approve your flaws and also those of others, it's very hard to be upset. It is necessary to offer yourself and others the space to be themselves.

http://ezinearticles.com/?9-Tips-to-Stop-Being-So-Easily-Annoyed-And-Offended&id=9477026

Really? There Are Things You Can Change About Yourself To Be Peaceful Within

Really! There are things we can change about ourselves to be at peace within? Just like the title says it, you bet ya.

Well, let's get down to business. Man wants to be at peace with itself and just like you, we want peace in our lives as well.

But, to get there we have to change things about ourselves to create this inner peace in our heads.

First the world is not going to change for us, we have to get it through our thick numskull heads. We need to grow up and stop acting as little children and see the brutal bloody reality that it's not them, it's us. Brutal eh?

I am just being honest here, there are things we MUST change about ourselves to get there. Stop playing the sympathy card we are strong man, man in tights, well not exactly but soldiers.

Okay, I am ready. Are you? Getting to the nitty giddy, you want peace, I want peace, we all want an increased peace of mind and perhaps the whole sha bang as well! Yummy. This reminded me a bit about cake. Anyway, we want peace, tranquility everything that is related, concern or married to being well. That is why you're reading this.

But one thing that is for sure keeping us from being at peace with ourselves is our own idea about perfection. We want to think we are perfect or hope others see us as perfect even though in the inside we are dying slowly, melting away.

We come up with these crazy ideas that come our of the blue, "I am not perfect, they are not perfect, why in the world do I have high standards for others... etc... etc... "

Just thinking about this makes me bonkers. But let's be honest and sincere here, we are not at peace in our own mind because we want everything to be perfect, polished, dent-free and because our lives are not a certain way or because we are not a certain way we cry.

Staple a sheet of paper on your forehead that says " I am not perfect and should not expect others to be". Perhaps, and I am saying here perhaps this will help, but more than likely it will not.

We are stubborn people that want fast results, certain things to happen, logical beings, squared, rigid and we want things to be a certain way. Too bad they are not, sorry to burst your navy blue bubble.

I guess what I am saying here is, we have to change us. We have to stop expecting others to change for us when they will not.

We have to grab our... and look at ourselves in the mirror and change. We want to feel that sensation of tranquility in our lives. We need to stop blaming others for our unhappiness or troubled mind. Oh I hope this works.

I guess you're right. We need to change. There is no easy way to this. It's just us against the world. We can do this, if we change the world will not affect us. If they change, well, that would be awesome, but no, they will not change. We change.

How will we get there? It's simple we know that getting there is a personal process, self-development or improvement what ever you want to call it. We have to have hope for ourselves.

Most of us are not at peace with ourselves because we are such pessimistic, miserable people, we're just good old plain negative about everything, come on shine me some light here, I am dying.

Hope, this is what is going to save us. We must have hope that we will gain peace in our lives, hope that we know how to get there, hope that we will learn to work on ourselves.

We are hopeful people and peaceful folks.

Live up to your potential, that is what we must do.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Really?-There-Are-Things-You-Can-Change-About-Yourself-To-Be-Peaceful-Within&id=9358953

What Lasting Legacy Will You Leave?

Ben Franklin was our oldest and perhaps wisest of the Founding Fathers, at 70 years of age, when he signed the "Declaration of Independence".

Ben Franklin grew up with16 siblings. He was the fifteenth and "youngest son" of Josiah Franklin, soap and candle maker, and his second wife Abiah Folger Franklin. Ben had 9 full siblings and 7 half siblings. At an early age Ben became an excellent reader and did well at the "Boston Latin School". When Ben was 10, his father ran out of money to send him to school. So Ben came to work full time with his father at the soap and candle store. When he was 12, Ben was apprenticed to his older brother, James who taught him newspaper publishing.

When Franklin was 20 years old, he developed his character by creating a system of "Thirteen Virtues" to live by. "1. Temperance 2. Silence. 3. Order 4. Resolution 5. Frugality 6. Industry 7. Sincerity 8. Justice 9. Moderation 10. Cleanliness 11. Tranquility 12. Chastity 13. Humility"

Franklin's "13 Virtues" are timeless. These are the virtues that molded Franklin into a strong thinker and role model for the future. He worked on one virtue each week. Benjamin Franklin said, "Tho' I never arrived at the perfection I had been so ambitious of obtaining, but fell far short of it, yet I was, by the endeavor, a better and a happier man than I otherwise should have been if I had not attempted it."

We all need "virtues" to live and strive for!

At twenty-two years of age, Franklin opened his printing shop and his newspaper, the "Pennsylvania Gazette". His newspaper was both well read and profitable and later his book "Poor Richard's Almanack" became a best seller in the colonies. In Pennsylvania, Maryland, Delaware, and New Jersey he became the official printer, printing documents, laws, and money. He also helped begin newspapers in Connecticut, New York, and in the West Indies.

Ben Franklin everyday of his life wanted to make the lives around him better. He asked himself two questions daily.

Every morning he asked himself, "What good shall I do this day?" Every evening he asked himself, "What good have I done today?"

Every day Franklin took that first step to make someone else's life better. When Franklin saw a need he filled it. He built the "First Lending Library in America", the "First Fire Department in Pennsylvania," establishing the first hospital, "Pennsylvania Hospital", and when he saw families suffering from losing their homes to fire he helped establish the "Philadelphia Contribution for Insurance Against Loss by Fire." When New Jersey had a problem with counterfeit money, he developed "a currency with anti-counterfeiting techniques". Ben Franklin enjoyed helping others solve their problems. The legacies he created have lasted over 240 years. What legacies are you leaving for the next generation?

So what are the three questions you should ask your self each day?

1) What virtue will I work on this week? Remember, it is never too late to grow and change. http://www.thirteenvirtues.com

2) Just as Benjamin Franklin asked himself each morning, ask yourself, "What good shall I do this day?"

3) Every evening ask yourself Benjamin Franklin's question, "What good have I done today?"

By helping others you will have great satisfaction and leave a lasting legacy just as Benjamin Franklin did.

http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Lasting-Legacy-Will-You-Leave?&id=9436738

Kaizen: Key to Money Success

The principles of lean production, a manufacturing system developed by Toyota, can improve your finances by helping you to efficiently utilise the precious resources of time and money. Lean has another feature that can be essential to your financial success -- the concept of kaizen.

Kaizen, Japanese for change (kai) for the good or better (zen), is defined in Dictionary.com as "a business philosophy based on making positive changes on a regular basis to improve productivity." It also signifies "an approach to one's personal life that focuses on continuous improvement."

The kaizen way involves making tiny incremental steps until the production process is perfected or the most efficient method is being utilised. The journey towards perfection is never really complete, however, as there will always be new ways to improve as time and technology advances.

Change is essential for growth

One of the reasons why many people struggle to achieve their goals is that their attitudes and actions are not aligned with the objectives they desire. In fact, what they think and what they do are actually hindering them from accomplishing the resolutions that they painstakingly make each year.

Writing down goals and crafting action plans to carry them out will not lead to positive results if you don't address the situations that need to be improved or removed. Like a lean operation, you must strive to discover and fix those areas which may be making you inefficient and ineffective.

Acquiring new habits of success is not an overnight process; as erasing long-held negative beliefs and behaviour can take years of dedicated work. This is why incorporating a system of continuous improvement needs to be an important element of your game plan for money success.

The road to improvement

In business, kaizen involves assessing, planning, implementing and evaluating processes to make sure that a company's operations are carried out efficiently. To boost your personal production, you also need to continually check your results and make adjustments to your actions as required.

While it's easy for us to see other people's problems which sabotage their efforts to accomplish their goals, it's usually harder to recognise our own faults. Change for the better will only come when you accept that if you are not where you want to be, you must be doing something wrong.

This acceptance must be accompanied by a willingness to find out why you might be going astray and the humility to seek corrective advice. Misplaced pride and defensive excuses will not help you to eliminate those crippling issues that have prevented you from realising your dreams in the past.

The truth will set you free

Honesty and deep introspection will be critical to applying kaizen in your life. Stop kidding yourself about the real state of your finances; don't try to justify your money problems or blame others for your lack of progress. What have you been doing that has led to your current financial position?

For example, if you're struggling to save because you overspend on the latest clothes, you need to ask yourself why looking good is more important to you than your money goals. Do you have self esteem issues to overcome, or do you really believe that you deserve to have lasting wealth?

Once you have identified the areas for improvement, then you need to decide how best to move forward. So, if unplanned expenses are wreaking havoc with your cash flow, you must prepare a detailed budget to help you manage your money and live within your means.

Kaizen should be your goal

If there is one resolution that you pledge to fulfill this year, let it be to routinely assess your progress with your objectives, see where there is room for improvement, identify and implement strategies which can help you to do better, and continue this evaluation process for the rest of your life.

Implementing kaizen in your life may not necessarily bring instantaneous or dramatic results. However, the small but potent changes that you continually make to your thoughts and actions will eventually lead to improved results and ultimately your success in accomplishing your goals.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Kaizen:-Key-to-Money-Success&id=9324566

10 Simple Ways You Can Stop Yourself From Overthinking

Here are 10 simple ideas to help overthinkers stop spinning their wheels.

Overthinking doesn't sound so bad on the surface--thinking is good, right?

But overthinking can cause problems.

When you overthink, your judgments get cloudy and your stress gets elevated. You spend too much time in the negative. It can become difficult to act.

If this feels like familiar territory to you, here are 10 simple ideas to free yourself from overthinking.

1. Awareness is the beginning of change.

Before you can begin to address or cope with your habit of overthinking, you need to learn to be aware of it when it's happening. Any time you find yourself doubting or feeling stressed or anxious, step back and look at the situation and how you're responding. In that moment of awareness is the seed of the change you want to make.

2. Don't think of what can go wrong, but what can go right.

In many cases, overthinking is caused by a single emotion: fear. When you focus on all the negative things that might happen, it's easy to become paralyzed. Next time you sense that you starting to spiral in that direction, stop. Visualize all the things that can go right and keep those thoughts present and up front.

3. Distract yourself into happiness.

Sometimes it's helpful to have a way to distract yourself with happy, positive, healthy alternatives. Things like meditation, dancing, exercise, learning an instrument, knitting, drawing, and painting can distance you from the issues enough to shut down the overanalysis.

4. Put things into perspective.

It's always easy to make things bigger and more negative than they need to be. The next time you catch yourself making a mountain out of a molehill, ask yourself how much it will matter in five years. Or, for that matter, next month. Just this simple question, changing up the time frame, can help shut down overthinking.

5. Stop waiting for perfection.

This is a big one. For all of us who are waiting for perfection, we can stop waiting right now. Being ambitious is great but aiming for perfection is unrealistic, impractical, and debilitating. The moment you start thinking "This needs to be perfect" is the moment you need to remind yourself, "Waiting for perfect is never as smart as making progress."

6. Change your view of fear.

Whether you're afraid because you've failed in the past, or you're fearful of trying or overgeneralizing some other failure, remember that just because things did not work out before does not mean that has to be the outcome every time. Remember, every opportunity is a new beginning, a place to start again.

7. Put a timer to work.

Give yourself a boundary. Set a timer for five minutes and give yourself that time to think, worry, and analyze. Once the timer goes off, spend 10 minutes with a pen and paper, writing down all the things that are worrying you, stressing you, or giving you anxiety. Let it rip. When the 10 minutes is up, throw the paper out and move on--preferably to something fun.

8. Realize you can't predict the future.

No one can predict the future; all we have is now. If you spend the present moment worrying about the future, you are robbing yourself of your time now. Spending time on the future is simply not productive. Spend that time instead on things that give you joy.

9. Accept your best.

The fear that grounds overthinking is often based in feeling that you aren't good enough--not smart enough or hardworking enough or dedicated enough. Once you've given an effort your best, accept it as such and know that, while success may depend in part on some things you can't control, you've done what you could do.

10. Be grateful.

You can't have a regretful thought and a grateful thought at the same time, so why not spend the time positively? Every morning and every evening, make a list of what you are grateful for. Get a gratitude buddy and exchange lists so you have a witness to the good things that are around you.

Overthinking is something that can happen to anyone. But if you have a great system for dealing with it you can at least ward off some of the negative, anxious, stressful thinking and turn it into something useful, productive, and effective.

http://www.inc.com/lolly-daskal/10-simple-ways-you-can-stop-yourself-from-overthinking.html