Showing posts with label make a change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label make a change. Show all posts

It's Good To Be Blessed, But It's Better To Be A Blessing To Others


Be a blessing to others by sharing no matter what little you have. Simple things are appreciated as long as it is done with a whole heart. Everyday we pray asking for good things to happen without looking that other people are suffering. Talking about the situation won't help unless of course we do something to make a change.

Another excuse for not being able to help others is that you don't have money. Helping doesn't always mean a huge sum of a donation but what's important is the opportunity to help others if we just reach out to do so. It can either be by means of a moral support to someone who is in pain or a helping hand whenever someone needs help.

God has blessed us to be a blessing to others. We should look not only to our own interests, but also to the interests of others. Our actions won't matter nearly as much as the heart behind it. Sometimes, all we have to offer is courtesy. A simple "good morning," or a smile at someone and not be offended if your deed is not reciprocated. This is in fact easier said than done. For example, during our Christmas Party, I want to give the best to my manito or manita, so, I really bought a good gift. I was happy that the one who received my gift was delighted with my present but when I opened my gift, I was a bit disappointed because I did not expect to receive something like that. But then, again, I realized that what's important was the joy that I brought from the gift I gave more than to what I received.

In other words, we need to give freely and willingly, especially to those who cannot give back to us. We have our time, talent, substance - not to hoard, but to share, so others may see the goodness of God through us. We need to have the heart to give a little with a cheerful heart and spirit.

We need to be selfless. Charity starts at home, but it doesn't need to stay there. We don't have to be upset by the situations that we may see as inconveniences in the moment. Though, sometimes being selfless will require being flexible.

Giving back to others ultimately does more for us especially in our disposition in life than the person receiving our gift. It's about giving without expecting any return.

Having a strong core values isn't just something we throw around. It means that we need to actively participate in a worthwhile cause and be a blessing to others.



https://ezinearticles.com/?Its-Good-To-Be-Blessed,-But-Its-Better-To-Be-A-Blessing-To-Others&id=9774759

Is There a Passive-Agressive Person in Your Life?

Face Faces Dialogue - Free photo on Pixabay

At best, their behavior is dishonest. At worst, it's abusive. But you may not have even noticed it. That's because a passive-aggressive person can be so subtle you may not realize their supposed joke was really a hostile remark. Or their procrastination at getting something you need done is really their way of making you suffer. Or countless other covert behaviors.

When an abusive person hits you, you know you need to make sure it doesn't happen again. Likewise, when a passive-aggressive (P-A) person pretends to behave lovingly toward you, but really causes you psychological pain, you need to make a change. And you can only change the way you behave, not the P-A. But before you can make a change, you need to identify the P-A.

Conflict Avoidance. It's hard to spot a person who is always nice and gets along as someone with a problem. In the case of passive-aggressives, they find conflict of any kind so difficult that they avoid it at great cost to themselves and others. They are unable to express anger in a healthy way, so it foments. This may contribute to their low self-esteem, which, when combined with aggressive, domineering behavior, is a toxic mix. This toxicity builds up each time they say "yes" when they should have said "no." Then their self-loathing and their resentment towards others increase. It's a downward spiral.

Inability to Say No. This is the same side of the coin as conflict avoidance. A passive-aggressive person cannot say no to anyone or anything. He needs acceptance but when he capitulates it feeds his lack of self-esteem, which makes him feel worse. Still, he will tell you, Yes, he'll be on the committee, and then he won't show up for meetings. Or Yes, he'll work on the project, but then he won't have any work done on it when you need it. And when you ask him about it, he'll be vague. Ambiguity is another hallmark of a P-A.

Propensity to Procrastinate. A P-A will find it hard to meet any deadline, even those he sets for himself. He'll procrastinate and procrastinate until it's impossible to meet any goal. In this way he sabotages the effort he's involved in until you do it yourself. Or you decide to never ask him again because it's easier to do yourself. And he gets out of performing any future tasks, which has been his secret goal all along.

The root causes of passive-aggressiveness are varied and complex. When you have to deal with a P-A it's hard to know why the person is the way he is, let alone what to do about it. Next week we'll talk about strategies for handling the P-A in your life.


https://ezinearticles.com/?Is-There-a-Passive-Agressive-Person-in-Your-Life?&id=8671466

Be Crazy Enough To Think You Can Change The World

Woman Standing on Cliff

Be crazy enough to think you can change the world, and you just might. Although it looks like it is set in its ways, humanity is in fact extremely open to change by people who dare to swim against the tide of history. The major changes and inventions in evolution are always made by such mavericks.
So, which kind of person would you like to be? Are you crazy enough to make a change? Do you want to take the easy path, the one less traveled or create yours? Can you keep going even when all the odds are against you?

Very often, you hear a small voice which tells you that you cannot accomplish your goals. It is all in your mind and yet, you struggle to get rid of it. When you hear it, it is hard not to believe in it. But instead of fighting it, do exactly what it says you cannot do. That is how you can overcome doubt.

People frequently believe that if something did not yet happen in history, it is either because it cannot happen or it should not. So many people believe that there is no point in trying, all of that because someone crazy enough has or is trying already. But to change the world, you must think differently.

"Do not go where the path may lead but go instead where there is no path, and leave a trail." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Challenge the Status Quo
And yet, some eccentric people are crazy enough to work diligently towards their dreams. They do everything so that their vision comes true. And they are the ones who think they can change the world, knowing and believing in what they want to create. It is great to admire such successful people but you must not try to become them; rather be inspired by them to create your own.

Throughout the course of my life, I do not know why, but I always love to challenge the status quo. People often think I break the rules, but I do not see it that way. I mean, do not get me wrong, I am a maverick. And yes, rules and status quo have their place at times. But too many people in this world put their mind on automatic and just follow the easy road.

Yet, if the world wants to progress and move forward, it needs some mavericks to challenge the existing conditions once in a while. No matter what your belief or feelings are; it is true that all of us have the power to change the world. But only those who are crazy enough to think they can alter it do.

Be Crazy Enough
Know that you are born with the same amount of power embedded within you. So do not be afraid to think or be irrational if you have impossible dreams. Keep on pursuing them until you transform or revolutionize the globe. Throughout history, there are multiple accounts of people who were crazy enough to think that they could change the world and actually did.

And yet, too many people think they do not have such potential, ability, influence, or even good ideas to change things on this wonderful planet. Well, these people are right. The reason being is that, as always, you become what you think about. You create what is in your mind, never more.

But then, you have those creative thinkers full of confidence, the great visionaries that think and are sure they can create things. These are the people who change the world around us. So, you have to be a go-getter, an innovator, and more often than not, crazy enough to believe in your ideas.

"When 99% of people doubt your idea, you are either gravely wrong or about to make history." - Scott Belsky
Go Change the World
When you do go for your dreams, it is never going to make sense or be obvious. You are never going to walk out of your door and see a clear way that you have to go. But if you ever do, it is a trap. If you go down the path that is already laid for you, it is going to take you to all the destinations that are already known.

Thus, it is going to take you to all of the places that nature drove people before you. But if you want to go somewhere unique, someplace only you feel like going, create something new, change the world and really live a life that has meaning for you, you have to craft it on your own. You have to take the first step through faith.

"As you start walking out on the way, the way appears." - Rumi
And as you are looking at the choices that are before you, you may see a path that is well-traveled. But there is also another that is not yet visible which will not become something until you step on it. You have to understand that this is what your life means to be if you are crazy enough.

Use your Natural Ability
But if you do not, the only frustration you will look back on with tremendous defeat is regret. You will know that what you did was easy, and even though it was you; it was already made by others before you. Yet, there is a natural mechanism inside of you, something that wants you to walk a path that has never been walked before.

And that ability is, right now, inside of you, which makes it even harder. You feel a desperate desire for things to be easy. But it will not be easygoing, it will be hard, and you are going to stumble, fall on your face, fail, but that is the only way you can change the world.

"Only a man who knows what it's like to be defeated can reach down to the bottom of his soul and come up with the extra ounce of power it takes to win when the match is even." - Muhammad Ali
Crazy Enough to Change the World
So, what you have to ask yourself is what you want. Do you want it to be easy, and follow the path to be well-worn? Or do you want the road to be yours? It is better to know that inside you is a natural resource that you can reach into and grab. And that it will be there at the moment you most need it.

You have to know what type of person you are. If you are crazy enough to think you can change the world, you have to be willing to walk the path less traveled, the one that does not exist. You have to be able to tread through the brambles. And be willing to fall because it is throughout that process of failure, pain, agony, and suffering that you will become the person you dream to be.

Therefore, it is the process that will make you, you and what will shape you. And it is that suffering which gives you the reserve to draw on when you need it the most. However, when you ask for safety and ease, know that you say a prayer for weakness.

Walk your Own Path
But when you take the hard way, know that you are forging yourself. When you make those demands, know that you are building a reserve tank that will be there when you need it. And when you walk the path that only you can walk, know that you are living the life you are meant to live.

And that is how you become the 'you' worth becoming and change the world. It is what happened to me. So, be crazy enough and do not be afraid to stand by yourself. Do not just use your talents and abilities only for your own success. But make a difference with them. Do something of significance.

As a result, when you put all of those things together, it just causes you not to accept the status quo. The choice to be the person you want to be is all yours. Your inner power bubbles within. It waits to come up and explode, and nourish the world with changes.

Know you Can Change the World
Down the road, many years from now, you will be more disappointed in the chances that you never took than the ones you actually did. So, do not be afraid to simply take a leap of faith. Leave the shore, sail away from your comfort zone, discover the unknown and live your life.

As you know, we all have a limited time on earth. So, you do not need to live your life according to the views of others. Do not let people's beliefs take over the inner voice of your heart and soul. Be bold enough to follow your gut. And be crazy enough to think you can change the world, and then you will!


https://ezinearticles.com/?Be-Crazy-Enough-To-Think-You-Can-Change-The-World&id=9913877

Don't Let Distractions Get in the Way (By Anne O'Dwyer)



Distractions can cause havoc with best laid plans! The recent spring weather, as great as it was; managed to entice me into the garden. I had a great time planning and planting my new garden and had a great time in the sunshine. However it was a great distraction to my time.

This was just the latest distraction; I have been procrastinating for months, following eighteen months of vertigo and general ill-health. I have allowed my business activity to slide into oblivion!

Well now is the time to make a change, I really prefer a structure to my life, a purpose and achieving goals, but I have been procrastinating and wandering through days with little to show for my time, not to mention less satisfaction and little purpose. Sunny days in the fresh air were a very enjoyable distraction and come the summer the fruits of my labour will hopefully be visible.

So how have I managed to wake-up and take charge of my life again? Well I decided to read a book I had previously published. The enthusiasm I felt when I wrote it filled me with the determination to turn my life around again and get back on track.

Sometimes it is easy to let yourself become bogged down by unfortunate events, ill-health or general day-to-day living. Spring always feels like a good time to turn things around and as nature turns the hedgerows green again my enthusiasm for change grows.

The trouble when you decide to catch up again with things that have descended in a downward spiral it is difficult to decide what to do first!

My decision was to reassess what is most important to me, and what I find most enjoyable. Life is too short not to prioritize things you enjoy doing!

The first was to get fit again I am not overweight just a bit flabby from lack of exercise and my balance has gone to pot after my leg fracture etc. So Tia Chi I'm told should help that, plus a toning program and if I can fit it in - balance exercises on my Wii fit.

My second was to rebuild my online business and work at home. I have all the knowledge I just need the determination to put it all into practice! So with all this planned activity I certainly shouldn't be bored by too much TV!

So if things of late haven't been going to plan, take heart and join me in a planned return to better times. It is easy to let procrastination and distractions take over your life, until one day you wake-up to find months or years have passed by. Decide what is really important to you and make a concerted effort to reach it - Wishing you great success and a happy journey too!


http://ezinearticles.com/?Dont-Let-Distractions-Get-in-the-Way&id=9931231

Message From the Universe: It All Starts With You

                       Woman Holding Pink Tulips
"It's not that some people in your life are mean-spirited, shortsighted, and ignorant; it's that they're grand, brilliant, and magnificent. Fellow adventurers who, at the peak of their glory, in worlds before this one, asked to dance with you in time and space, however briefly, so that they might learn a bit faster than otherwise.

And you know how you love healing.

In the presence of greatness,
The Universe"

You will encounter over 10 000 people in your lifetime, and sometimes more. You will come across evil individuals, jealous, vindictive, but also kind and generous and sweet people that will make you forget about the bad ones. No matter what it is, as long as you contribute positively to society and give your time to help others, you will definitely make a change. Unfortunately for us, the good people, many others will take advantage of others kindness to take advantage and benefit from it. Distance yourself from these people and be careful how you trust people. Never give more ammunition until you are 10000% sure you can trust that person. IF your personal details are in the hand of the wrong person, it can be detrimental to you if you stay on the defensive. It is important that you keep all your private information private, AT ALL TIMES. Be smart but stay kind.

The world is not the same as it used to be. With so much violence, riots, terrorism, human trafficking, murders, rapes and so much more, it feels like another Sodom and Gomorrah. just like the two cities in ancient history, and we all know what happened to these cities (Armageddon). Nevertheless, being who you are isn't dependent on others. You are your own person but it is obvious that you need to defend yourself at all cost when facing danger. It is a must to live your life the best possible way so you can feel accomplished. If you want to make changes in the world, you need to look from within. Pay it forward whenever you can and the rest will follow. When dealing with the wrong people, you will end up being cheated, being taken advantage and if you do pay that behavior forward, the next victim will feel like you felt and will do the same to others. This is how the cycle begins. It has to be broken somehow or it will never stop. All of the good can start with you. Make the difference and make that change that we all desperately are looking for.



http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-It-All-Starts-With-You&id=9602811

17 Pretexts Why Most People Are Giving Up Way Too Easily


It appears that often, most of us are giving up way too easily when it comes to make a change or create something new in our lives. We begin by getting excited and captivated, but when we come across obstacles that are in our way, we decide to let our emotions get the best of us and give up.
Why does it happen? Why do people give up on things dear to their heart? Why have you given up on some of your dreams?

At the start, you get excessively happy to pursue a goal. You are even enthusiastic about it. You believe that it is something worth doing, something you want to master but after a while, when the euphoric emotions start to fade away, you often feel disappointed and walk away from the all thing.

This topic is a subject that takes me to heart! It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure why most people call it quit way so easily. Typically, it is often because their goal gets too hard or it just takes too long. Unfortunately, people have all kinds of pretexts for giving in after a couple of failures.

But failure is a part of the process to success and is going to happen no matter what you do. You are always going to encounter walls, barriers, obstacles. It is normal in the beginning to be inexperienced or clueless about what you are doing.

"Every master was once a beginner, and every pro began as an amateur" - Robin Sharma

The Need to Face Your Difficulties
You should realize that obstacles in your way will not vanish, but you can get ready for them. You can prepare to overcome these walls, barriers, obstacles and even the doubts you have. As you progress, you get to learn more, practice more, and build more commitment towards your goal which in turn prepares you even better for difficulties that may arise.

Often, when you are facing problems, your emotions get in the way and try to take control. These feelings are not helping you to achieve the success you desire. During those times, you do not see the prospect of the long-term rewards because these protecting reactions only care about the present and not the future.

The primary cause people do not get what they desire is because they give up way too soon. Success may have been around the corner. Have you given up on things before? If you are anything that is human, you probably did.

At some point in life, we all packed it up and walked away. Do you remember the times where you have decided or tried something and then quit when it became too hard? How many times have you put off taking action until later, because you felt like it was not the right time?

The fact of the matter is that many of us give up far too rapidly! So, why do most people give up so easily? Here are my top 17 pretexts which people are using when giving up. I added a tip to each reason to get around it.

1. Lack of Determination
Understand that by having a lack of determination, all you worked so hard for will be gone the instant you choose to give up. You have control over this kind of decision. No one can do it for you or give you this willpower.

It is your duty to finish what you've started. If you can persist, be consistent, carry on with your efforts, and do not give up, you will inevitably arrive where you want.

2. Unbelief in Your Abilities
At one point in your life, someone close to you told you that you could not do it, and you did believe those words. Next time a person says such thing, begin to read biographies of people who have succeeded against all the odds knowing that such words have no power whatsoever.

The ultra-marathoner David Goggins has a video which is very inspirational. If you have never seen it, you should watch it. Do not worry; I will be here when you have finished.

3. Someone Else's Goal
If you ever work for someone else or had goals chosen by relatives for you, you know what I am talking about. These targets that are not yours! It is tough to keep being motivated if you feel that this is not your purpose in life.

You need to choose your own goals, take possession of them and act.

                                     

4. Life is Already Good
You should realize that the better your life, the more you feel tempted to let things the way they are. You might think that your life is good enough, so you settle, and give up on going further.

Let me tell you that no matter how good your life now is, it can always improve. Therefore, next time you feel like settling or stagnating, think about the facets of your life you dislike and focus on cultivating them.

5. Not Desire to Put Time in
Do not underestimate the time it takes to complete specific goals because you then get overwhelmed and have no desire to put the required time in.

You do not need more time; you just need to use it more efficiently. Focus on your priorities which are the most important things first. Use the Pareto Principle and spend 80% of your time on what will get you the most results, instead of just looking busy.

6. No Self-Confidence
When making changes or starting something new, you need self-belief, self-confidence. If there are any doubts about your abilities to succeed, you will have the desire to want to give up.

When I need a boost in my self-confidence, I close my eyes, take a deep breath and recall all of my skills, experiences, knowledge, as well as other assets I have.

7. Not Wanting to Do the Hard Work
The road to success is everything but an easy one. In adding to the issue of time, the difficulty comes into play. As soon as something is getting harder than you thought, it can be discouraging but know that the goals you should be most proud of are usually the most challenging.

If something is harder than you thought, it is time to work harder than you should. Strengthen and cultivate the abilities you need to progress so that over time, things will get easier.

8. Absence of Focus
What keep you from focusing nowadays are all the many distractions you have, which takes your time away from aiming at the important stuff! Social Media is an excellent example of that! The absence of focus leads to unproductive efforts which incline you to quit.

Create time by switching off or logging off social media sites and turn off your phone's notifications. This way, you will stay focused on the task at hand.

9. Interruptions
Interruptions and distractions might be coming by way of other people, television, phone or noise. You should know that it is impossible to jump from one goal to another, as you never feel or find that you are making any progress forward.

You should avoid any interruptions by finding a place where you will be in peace. Work on one thing at a time. Efficiency is the key here.

10. No Immediate Results
Today, everyone is a hurry to get instant gratification. But remember that anything worthwhile creating takes much time, and each flower needs time to blossom.

The more you work towards your goals; day in and day out, the earlier you will achieve them.

11. Very Little Reward
By working so hard and put in all that time, you thought you would have better outcomes. You get disappointed because your goal does not transform into the desired results. A lot of people give up easily when it feels like they are working hard for nothing.

You have to set mini milestones along your path and bit by bit you will see the rewards. Success will not come overnight to transform your life. As in any sport or as for any athlete, you need to train and practice to master.

12. No Enthusiasm or Inspiration
As you start making a change or creating something new, you feel full of enthusiasm and you are inspired and motivated. Then these feelings start to wear off, and you realize it is not that easy. Your inspiration fades away, and you just abandon.

Just think about your end goal, and remember why you are doing this. Remember what inspired you about your objective and put emphasis on those features.

13. Habits are Difficult to Change
Getting started is not always the hard part. The awkward phase is often getting rid of your habits or lifestyle, and to replace them. Changing a pattern is not an easy thing to do. There is also the fear of a new habit and the appeal of an old one.

You have to focus on your progress, not perfection. Realize that falling back sometime into old patterns is a normal reaction. Personal change is like taking two steps forward and one step back. What is crucial is to keep momentum to move forward.

14. Not Worth the Effort
Perhaps you had an idea but realized that it was just a short wish. You then understood that it was not worth the effort, the sacrifices or that you are going in the wrong direction.

Revisit and evaluate your goals, and if they are no longer what you want, then it is not giving up. Know that you were born a winner!

15. Scared of Leaving the Comfort Zone
Even if things in your life may not have been perfect before, you felt comfortable with them. It was a comfortable and easy routine. But in leaving your comfort zone to get into a world of doubt and struggles, you miss it.

You should only know that without leaving your comfort zone, there won't be any growth or progress and that once you have obtained what you want, you will be able to go even further.

                                 

16. A Ridiculous Idea
People think you are too old to begin all over and start something new. They believe that following your dream is not a realistic concept, or they believe it to be a childish fantasy.

Well, what people think is their problem. It is your life and your future. So choose wisely!

17. It Should Be Easy
You think it should be easy but when things are not running as they should, you quit, and so no more effort is required. You just give up, and the problems related to that go away. Easy does it!

The minute you start something, surround yourself with and talk to people who encourage you and are interested in your success.

A Final Word on Giving Up
The one important thing that sets successful people apart from the people who do not is their capacity to persist, keep going even after failure and never give up.

My final suggestion to you is that sometime, you may have to lock yourself in a room and scream at with all your strength. Do it until you get it out of your system. Then move on and get back to work.

Know also that your current circumstances are not the final outcomes.

A great thing about not giving up is that it a skill you can acquire. Be patient enough and do not be discouraged by the lack of instant results. A lot of people are using the above excuses and give up way too easily. Just decide that you're not going to quit. And instead be unstoppable!



http://ezinearticles.com/?17-Pretexts-Why-Most-People-Are-Giving-Up-Way-Too-Easily&id=9764379

Why An Attitude Of Gratitude Can Free Yourself


If there is one place where we should be completely free, then it is in our own mind.

We might have limitations in terms of what our bodies are capable of and what we're allowed to do - but our minds should be free to roam wherever we want, whenever we want.

Unfortunately, this is not the reality most of us live in. Very often, our thoughts are dictated by our circumstances and those circumstances are largely out of our control.

This is why we usually find ourselves feeling dissatisfied and constantly wanting to push forward and look at the jackpot in the future, rather than taking time to enjoy the process and smelling the roses along the journey.

And without being too political or philosophical, our capitalist lifestyles, the Hollywood portrayed false sense of reality, and the consumerism culture sometimes reinforce this materialistic nature that can push us further down the rabbit hole.

The simple question to get a reality check is to ask yourself, "Are you happy right now?"

Most of us are constantly in a position of slight dissatisfaction.

We feel as though there's 'one more thing' that could make our lives better and help us to be happier.

Maybe we said we just needed another one million dollar to feel secure.

Maybe we said we just needed to build a bigger better house to be satisfied.

Maybe we said we just needed a better higher-paid job to start loving to work.

Of course, we do want certain things and there's nothing wrong with enjoying material goods for pleasure.

But often, we have been conditioned (or even brainwashed) by the manipulated images from the media or advertising industry that told us what we "NEED" to have in order to be happy.

More money. More games. More clothes. More drinks. More sex. More friends. More holidays. More this and more that.

So most of us work harder to keep up the buying pace, which eventually stressed the crap out of us to accomplish the next thing in order to keep the economical machine spinning.

Let's do a quick exercise together.

Now, take a think about a game you find yourself (or your kids) wanting.

Aren't there Xbox, PlayStation or computer games on your shelf right now that you haven't played yet?

Aren't there free games you could download or free activities you can engage in and have just as much fun with?

Isn't it just marketing messages that are pushing you towards that next game and that next expense?

Likewise, ask yourself if having a billion more would really make you happier.

You can travel very cheaply right now - the problem is probably more with leaving work. More responsibility isn't going to help that!

So how do you make a change and start to be freer and happier right now?

The answer is that you change your focus.

Instead of fixating on what you don't have and on what you want, instead start to fixate on what you already have and what you're grateful for.

This is called a 'gratitude attitude' and it's the fastest route to having a satisfying and happy life.

People often aren't happy not because they want another thing or they lack certain things, it's just because they FORGOT they already have so many things.

Just make a reminder every night to jot down the top 3-5 things you can be grateful for in your journal.

When you start to collecting these little things of the day, you will open yourself up to see an entire new world of abundance.

Try that tonight, and make it a habit for the rest of your life.


http://ezinearticles.com/?Why-An-Attitude-Of-Gratitude-Can-Free-Yourself&id=9529623


You Can Avoid Most of the Rough Rapids of Life

Chances are, the habits you want to change have been hanging around for quite some time. The bad eating habits and the procrastination to do the workout that you know you should. Feeling the frustration and guilt build each time you reach for the chocolate or pizza, beating yourself up and feeling so low that you don't feel like you have the strength to say no to the next temptation. Always feeling tired and out of control.

Are you one of the many who struggle with their finances? Spending more than you earn each month and seemingly in a never ending pile of debt that weighs you down and feels like you will never be able to pay it off. I speak to so many people who want to take action on their business or career and make a change in this area but get stalled and stuck by their inner game (we'll come back to this inner game stuff in a moment).

For many others I speak to, it's their intimate relationships causing them stress. So many folks have got to a place of arguing, resentments and frustrations with each other that being together just doesn't feel like fun anymore. Or maybe you've hit that age old problem of becoming 'room mates'. You know the one, where you love each each other but you're not 'in love' anymore. The passion and the excitement has waned and you simple coexist in a polite but unfulfilling space.

Whatever Changes You Want To Make, It's All About Getting Out Of The Rapids Of Your Life

Imagine, if you will, a beautiful sunny day. The sun is at its highest and warmest point of the day and bathing your skin in life giving warmth and goodness. The water is flowing gently but ever onwards down river as you lie in your small boat with your eyes closed listening to the gentle splashing of the water. As you open your eyes and look about you, lush green grass caress' the land on both sides of the river. In the distance, you see the majesty of a beautiful mountain watching over you as you meander down river on this beautiful care free, peaceful summers day. Peace, tranquillity, contentment, joy, simply being.

This is how life feels for you every day, right? I know, you needn't message me and call me names, I'm kidding. I know this is moments in life for most. And those moments are far too infrequent for most people too.

Life rarely feels like that beautiful sunny day floating down the gentle river. It more often feels like we've hit the rapids, right?! As we cling tightly to the side of the boat, our whole body tensed and stressed as we navigate the next few yards of craziness and danger. We look down the river and only see more rapids and we wonder 'will I be able to hang on long enough to get out of this?!' As we are thrown in all directions, crashing into all sides of our boat, we pray and shout and moan about how we got here and how the hell we are gonna get out.

Eventually the rapids end and we take a deep breath and fall back into the boat exhausted, only to hit the next fork in the river and choose the direction of rapids once more.

Sound familiar? If so, don't worry. If you poke your head above the edge of your boat, you'll see that most people are hitting the rapids far too often and struggling through them along with you. But we can choose differently.

We Can Choose To Miss Most Of The Rapids

How we have been living life is how we've been living life! The beliefs, perspectives, thoughts and emotions we continually and habitually experience are the shapers and moulders of how we perceive life and how it unfolds for us.

If you have an engrained habit of getting angry at the slightest provocation, then you are going to continue to experience getting angry. You keep choosing the rapids, but you can choose the sunny day and gentle flowing option.

If you believe that you don't have what it takes to start the new business or go after the career or job you really want, you are going to feel the inner conflict that will show up in self-criticism, frustration, disappointment or even anxiety or depression.

If you really want to lose weight or get healthy and fit, but you have a belief about how hard it will be, or the fact that friendships or family relationships will be negatively effected, or you don't feel worthy deep down and don't believe you have what it takes to make the change, then get ready for a 'boat load' of rapids! You are going to hit those internal conflicts that are created when what you want can't happen because of the thoughts and emotional habitual patterns you are stuck in.

If you want to fix your finances and have more than enough money to buy the things you want and invest for your future, as well as helping the people around you, but you've got a habit that makes you spend more than you earn each month, you're taking the rapids again. Maybe you want more money, but deep down you have a belief that having plenty makes you fear losing it, or maybe it'll be a lot of work to look after it. Here's a biggy for you, maybe deep down you fear that people will judge you if you make good money and have plenty or it may not feel very spiritual to you.

Truth be told, you have a bunch of 'inner game' stuff going on and it is absolutely stopping you from having the things and experiences you really want in life.

The doubts, fears, insecurities, worries, anxieties, limiting beliefs and perspectives about you, men, women, corporations, planet earth, people's intentions and many other topics that we carry unconscious views about, are scuppering you and making it impossible for things you want to come into your life.

So what the heck do we do about all this? This is the fun bit. This is where change can really take a hold and we begin to feel our life slowly turning in the direction of our dreams and desires and feel that peace and contentment of floating on the calm river on the warm summer day much more of the time.

It doesn't come for free though. There isn't a smart quote or anecdote I can offer you here that will change everything for you. There are however, proven methods of change that you can start practicing regularly that will make all the difference.

The input that your brain receives is a bunch of thoughts and beliefs that are based on your life experience. Everything you've ever seen, heard, tasted, touched or smelled has been stored in your brain. Every emotion you ever felt got stored away. Every conversation you've had or heard in person or through TV or movies is in that brain of yours. Every single experience you have had since you were born has stored away in your brain and formed your beliefs, values and whole perspective of the world and your judgements about what everything means and is the cause for all the rapids you hit and all the beautiful calm waters you want but don't get.

Having more of what you want in life means changing the input. You must put something new into your brain that aligns with what you now want or you'll never have it.

Getting clear on what you really want in as much detail as possible is your first and most important step and most people miss this out. Get crystal clear on what you truly want and what it looks like, feels like, sounds like. How would life look and feel when you have or are doing the thing you want?

The more time you spend thinking about and feeling about how life is with the goal being met, the more you are changing the input in your brain and allowing yourself to choose that plain sailing part of the river more frequently.

The tools are endless: Read books on the topic of having what you want, create a vision board, get on Google and research the probable hundreds and thousands of people teaching the thing you want, set goals, practice affirmations, do clearing work to remove inner blocks, practice visualisations, work with coaches or trainers who specialise in what you want. There are endless tools available, you've simply got to start putting different references in your brain and doing it regularly enough to avoid many of the potential rapids.

Life will always have some rapids for you, regardless what you do. This is life, people pass away, relationships end, sometimes we are ill or things don't work out. This is natural and normal.

Most of the rapids we hit in life however, had a clear sign at the fork in the river that pointed for the calm, flowing river on the sunny day, we just missed the sign because the years of brain input made it invisible to us.

Get clear on what you really want next and start having conversations about it, read about it, talk to friends about it, speak to people who know all about what you want. And find out how to deal with the limits, fears, doubts and insecurities that will inevitably come up on your journey to what you really want in life. This is a sure recipe to creating your dreams.


http://ezinearticles.com/?You-Can-Avoid-Most-of-the-Rough-Rapids-of-Life&id=9584451

Making a Decision - Sometimes Waffling Back & Forth Is Part of the Process (By Maryanne Pope)

Image result for waffling

"We don't know if a choice is wise or wrong until we've lived it. We can't ever really know where a choice will take us, though we may sense its direction."

- Sarah Ban Breathach, Something More; Excavating Your Authentic Self

When it comes to making big life decisions, I tend to waffle back and forth.

I'm the type of person who tries to look at ALL the angles. I write out all the pros and cons I can think of. I ask people for their advice. I do the research. I wrack my brain trying to think of all the things that could go wrong. But, of course, trying to determine all the possible things that could go wrong - or right - is technically impossible... because we don't know what we don't know yet!

Sure, we can anticipate the obvious likely outcomes, if we chose a certain course of action. But there is simply no way we can anticipate all outcomes because there are, whether we like it or not, other variables that likely aren't even on our radar yet.

In other words, we don't live in a vacuum.

I've been waffling over a major life decision for quite some time now, so when I was reading the February 2017 edition of O Magazine, an article caught my eye. It was about the different types of decision makers there are. So I did the little quiz and it turned out I am "The Waffler." I laughed out loud... yup!

Here is the description of The Waffler:

"You're a thoughtful person who considers all the angles... but now you're overanalyzing, so busy looking you can't leap. The more time you spend thinking about what you should do, the less able you are to do anything at all."

YUP!

Sometimes I think so much, I think myself right into a big fat corner, immobilized by indecision and terrified of making the WRONG decision. So I put off making ANY decision... which, of course, is still a decision - just not a particularly proactive one.

In terms of advising us Wafflers on how to flip ourselves out of the pan of indecision, the article had this to suggest: "Do a gut check. Write your choices on a separate piece of paper and fold them into squares, then throw them in the air and pick up the one that lands closest. When you read what's inside, check your physical reaction. Are you holding your breath or sighing in relief? Do you feel lighter or heavier? Let your response be your guide."

So that's exactly what I did - and you know what? It kinda helped! And I think I know why.

This strategy is similar to a cute little coffee-table book I have, called The Book of Answers by Carol Bolt. It was given to me by a dear friend years ago. It is, literally, a book of answers, in that each page has a single "answer" on it.

So what you do is hold the book, close your eyes, ask yourself a close-ended question (e.g. "Is the job I am applying for the right one?"), then open the book up to whatever feels like the right page, open your eyes and ta da... there's your answer!

Here are a few sample answers:

"That's out of your control"

"Don't ignore the obvious"

"Make a list of why not"

"You are too close to see"

"You will find out everything you need to know"

Kids love it!

Now, of course, the book doesn't really have THE answer to our questions. It just has an answer - and it is up to us to see how that answer makes us feel. And that, I have found, can actually be very helpful - similar to the idea of tossing the pieces of paper in the air and randomly choosing one.

If I ask the book a question and I rather like the answer I get, then that tells me I might be on the right track. If I DON'T like the answer I get and am, in fact, a little miffed at the audacity of the Universe to suggest such a thing, then that is also revealing in terms of helping me figure out what I don't want.

"There comes a time when we aren't allowed to know."

- Judith Viorst

In the end, a decision needs to be made - even if it is the decision to do nothing at all. But what I've also come to realize over the years is that, for me, waffling may actually be an important part of the decision-making process.

Maybe we waffle when we know we have to make a change - but aren't quite sure what or when... possibly because there are other factors and forces at play that we have no control over?

Perhaps other things have to line up first and then when everything else is in place, the time comes for us to make our move - and, low and behold, we DO know what to do and when.

In other words, maybe the process of waffling has helped prepare us to be able to make the right decision when the right time comes to make it?

Food for thought.


http://ezinearticles.com/?Making-a-Decision---Sometimes-Waffling-Back-and-Forth-Is-Part-of-the-Process&id=9687297

Aspire to Make a Change

“Wisdom comes from making mistakes, having the courage to face them, and make adjustments moving forward based upon the knowledge aquired through those experiences.” 
― Ken Poirot


Five Secrets to Remain Focused When Your Back Is Against the Wall



Stay Focused on your Goals!

Basketball often teaches us valuable lessons that we can apply to our own lives. During the 2016 NBA finals, for instance, whether you were rooting for the Golden State Warriors or the Cleveland Cavaliers, we witnessed a number of viable strategies that can be used when our backs are against the wall, and how to stay laser-focused on your goals for the big win.

Even if you're not a basketball fan, the seven-game series taught us five vital principles for achieving success:

1. Don't complain. When the Cavaliers were losing three games to one during the best of seven series, with the world watching, it would have been easy to complain. It would have been easy to point fingers at the officials or other teammates. Instead, each player committed to doing what they needed to do to win. One starter, Kevin Love, went to the coach and volunteered to give up his starting position if it would help the team. He was willing to sacrifice his personal accolades for the big picture. When we are a part of a team, we too have to focus on the big picture to be successful.

2. Delete the junk from your mind. When the Cavaliers were down three games to one, many people said they could never win. Unfortunately, they had lost the NBA championship last year to the same team. Haters were saying, "they aren't good enough and will lose again." We have to delete from our minds the junk that we hear just as we delete junk from our computers. Junk only slows down our hard drive, and prevents us from achieving our goals. When negative people try to influence you, hit the delete button, and keep hitting delete delete delete. Stay focused on your goals. Only you can rewrite your story.

3. Don't let past failures define you. To win, the Cavaliers had to forget about last year's loss to Golden State. Use your past failures as a stepping stone. If you take the time to study why you didn't succeed last time, you can rework your blueprint for success. LeBron James said he had to review films and determine how he could improve his game. He then discovered what he needed to change. We have to also be willing to make a change to improve. If we can't accept that we need to make a change, sometimes this paralyzes us, and we will not move forward.

4. Don't be intimidated. Golden State Warriors were the champs. To defeat a champion, you have to possess a champion mentality. Pay attention to details and visualize the goal, just as LeBron James visualized winning. Determine what you want to achieve, and see yourself accomplishing that goal.

5. Do your thing. Analyze your strengths and weaknesses and determine how you can be a better you.

These principles can be applied in our daily lives. Eliminate self-doubt. People who achieve great success don't allow past failures to define them. The next time your back is against the wall, try these strategies and you too can be successful.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Five-Secrets-to-Remain-Focused-When-Your-Back-Is-Against-the-Wall&id=9453138

Spring Cleaning After Divorce

It's that time of year when we open the windows and enjoy the fresh air! It always made me feel better hearing the birds chirp, smelling the fresh air and cleaning as if it were a new beginning. Well, on a positive note, divorce is a new beginning! Put aside all the emotional feelings like sadness, anxiety and doubt about what you are supposed to do next, and consider some of the following tips for your financial spring cleaning!

1. Get your financial house in order. Update your will. Check that you have the proper beneficiaries listed on your life insurance policies. Review your retirement plans and get rid of non-performing investments (contact your CDFA or financial advisor if you need help). Get a file box or use a file drawer and label your files. Doing this will make it easy to find any important financial papers.

2. If you aren't doing what you love or loving what you do, then prepare to make a change! Update or write your resume. Take some courses and explore new opportunities in your area or an area that you would like to be in. Expect more from yourself. I'm sure you will be amazed what you're capable of achieving.

3. Review your credit report!! Not only is identity theft a concern today, but so is human error. I recently found that there was a major mistake on my credit report and it took me a lot of time to have it corrected. It is also a good place to see if you or your spouse have any accounts that you were unaware of. If you haven't already, make sure to establish credit in your name. Open a credit card, or the next time you purchase a car, register it in your name only.

4. This is also a great time to review your benefits at work. If you aren't involved in a retirement plan, and one is offered, enroll!! If you are already active in a plan, review it!! It may seem overwhelming and out of your comfort zone so consult a financial advisor. Most advisors are happy to review your statements and offer you some advice.

5. I am sure that you just got your taxes done and you are saying, "Next year I will be more organized!" That's what I said! So go buy a file for tax receipts only! Ask your accountant if s/he can provide you with some areas that may save you money on next year's tax return.

6. Divorce is a big change and a new beginning. You will want to update your wardrobe, and feel pretty!! I am a big supporter of dressing the way you want to feel!! This can be costly, so make a plan. First, clean out your current wardrobe. There are consignment shops, example: Plato's Closet, where you can sell your clothes and use that money to purchase new clothes for yourself. If you already have a budget, donate your clothes to women's shelters. You will feel great about helping other women and they will greatly appreciate it!! It's a win-win!!

7. Divorce is draining, I know. Emotionally and financially, you feel exhausted. You will need time to rebuild yourself and your finances; start by setting long- and short-term goals (write them on paper). Prepare your new budget and then meet with a financial advisor. You work hard for your money and your advisor can help ensure that your money is working hard for you.

Accept what your financial situation is now, make the changes that you can, and live accordingly. Focus on implementing the above suggestions and you will be able to move forward confidently rather than living in the past.


http://ezinearticles.com/?Spring-Cleaning-After-Divorce&id=9009131

You Are Responsible For Your Own Happiness



When you get the chance to, go and take a look at yourself in any mirror; what do you see? Who is it that is staring right back at you? Before I give an answer, I've seen a statement that is posted on a bathroom mirror at work that said, "You are responsible for your own safety." During the USPS training meeting, I reflected on this statement because it speaks a simple truth; we are responsible for our own actions, we cannot blame our failures on anyone else. Personal success and happiness works in the same way, it all starts with you. As I saw my reflection, I've seen that I have the power to not only keep myself safe at work, but to change my life temporally and spiritually. As you see yourself in the mirror, decide now on how you want to live the rest of your life. You are responsible for your own happiness.

Do not play the blame game. I remember a day when I asked one of my sons to put away the dishes and he said that he would do the job. A few minutes later, I would come walking back into the kitchen and see the dishwasher not emptied. I called my son into the kitchen and asked him why the dishes are not put away. His response was always the same, "Nobody came to help me." I told him bluntly that it is his duty and responsibility to put away the dishes. This went on for a few months, then, after all the constant reminders, he started putting the dishes away, without complaining or whining. Take full responsibility for your own actions; no one is going to do it for you.

Forget yourself and go to work. The greatest hindrance to our success is our own weaknesses. We can come up with all sorts of excuses and reasons of why we should not work or make a change in the way we live our life. Here are some examples:

1. I cannot cope with life if I do not have my can or bottle of beer.

2. Netflix has my favorite television show listed, time to pull a television show marathon. That 500 word article can wait.

3. This exercise program takes too long.

4. Why should I invent a product when I know that someone will build something that is bigger and better?

5. I am a horrible parent.

6. My family and peers will make fun of me.

7. I will never be good at anything.

8. I am too tired, stressed, or depressed to do anything.

My advice to you is to forget yourself and go to work. If you have a addiction problem, you can stop that habit cold-turkey. Some of you may reply, "Well, that's easy for you to say," my reply is, "Stop complaining and take full responsibility for your actions." Pornography, alcohol, drug, and any other forms of addictions can be stopped instantly; you just got to decide now of what's more important, your family and your own well-being or continue to be led captive by these little masters who destroy.

Go to work and strengthen your talents that will not only enrich your life, but the lives of other people. After you have looked in the mirror at yourself, decide now of who you want to become. You are responsible for your own happiness.

http://ezinearticles.com/?You-Are-Responsible-For-Your-Own-Happiness&id=9397259

10 Powerful Habits That Will Make You a Millionaire

Man in Black Suit Jacket Received A Good News

I remember sitting in a cold and dusty basement, searching for the habits that could change my life.
Being 21 years old, I was ready to take my life to the next level, but I felt stuck for three reasons: I lived at my parents' house, I had an $8-per-hour job, and I was enrolled in an never-ending MBA program. Deep down inside, I knew I had to escape. However, I wasn't going to run away from myself, which was something I always did.
This time, I was determined to make a change and I was deeply inspired to become successful, but I didn't know what to do or where to start. However, I firmly believed that if I changed my habits, my habits would change me. Instead of fooling around with miscellaneous activities, like sports and television, I decided to take up new habits, like reading books and giving speeches.
These habits led to a succession of positive results. Professionally, I became more competent. Personally, I became more confident. This realization that competence breeds confidence was the pivotal point that changed my life. It enabled me to reach the acme of success I now encounter, allowing me to create wealth and inspiration for millions of people.
Moreover, it came at a great sacrifice. These habits that I created were the anchors that made me who I am today. Therefore, here are the 10 powerful habits that will make you a millionaire:

1. Simplify Your Words

How well do you spread your message? Millionaires know how to share their message in simplest terms. They use their words with precision and possess deep meaning in what they say. Personally, I peruse the dictionary every day, but I would never attempt to use every word I know. By speaking pompously, many people exterminate their opportunities. In short, never drown people in the sea of verbosity. 

Unfortunately, too many people get lazy with their communication and subtly conform to the habits of others. However, millionaires diligently work on how to improve what they say and seamlessly find easier ways to say it, whether it's verbally or written.

2. Abandon the Old

Before you are able to face the new, you must relinquish the old. If you want a new car or house, then bless the old one and search for the new. When you want to achieve a positive mindset, you must get rid of the negative one first. To abandon your negative habits, you must replace them with positive ones.
I realized this great habit one day as I was feasting on a couple cheap burgers at McDonald's. With great disgust, I ventured out to find the finest steak houses in the area to seek new and delectable experience with my meals. Instead of indulging in $1 burgers several times a week, I was happier to splurge my money on a robust steak once or twice per month. 
We are what we repeatedly do. Therefore, excellence is not an act, but a habit. - Aristotle

3. Daily Goal-Setting

Every day, I set my goals on paper. This is an inspiring habit that I promise to keep for the rest of my life. Whether you're writing your financial projections, planning your weekly tasks, or scheming new ways to build your empire, you'll want to procure a daily goal-setting habit that will give you momentum on a daily basis.
When you set your goals every day, it allows you to prioritize and keep "first things first." Prioritization is doing first what matters most. Instead of pursuing $100 actions, this habit will promote you to embody $1,000 activities. Once you accumulate more profitable activities in your day, you'll add money to the bank, making you a millionaire in the process. 

4. Being Congruent

You must do what you say you're going to do. There will be many times in your life where you'll be asked to sacrifice your personal values to reach professional goals. When this temptation occurs, don't do it. There's nothing more valuable than remaining congruent in your personal and professional lives. It allows you to mix "business with pleasure."
Strangely enough, many people tell you that you can't mix business with pleasure. However, this assertion is absurd and will only be preached by incongruent people. When you're doing what you love, business is pleasure. When you're living a life that is based on integrity, your reputation will grow, enriching yourself and many others in the process. Never put your reputation in jeopardy by failing to remain congruent with your highest values and ideals. 

5. Decision-Making

The more decisions you make, the more successful you will be. While one person could make a dozen decisions in a day, another one can make hundreds in a day. The person who makes the most decisions will win, even if their decisions lead to failure. Just imagine, if you were going the opposite way on a one-way street, you'd learn to quickly make adjustments!
However, most people are afraid to make crucial decisions because they are conquered by fears, which leaves them paralyzed. Being paralyzed prevents them from making decisions, thereby forcing them to forfeit opportunities. Always make a decision, even if you don't know where it will lead. Soon enough, you'll find the answers you need. 

6. Asking Questions

Most people assume that they know answers. Their assumptions actually hold them back from knowing the truth. Truly, you want to ask questions to gain clarity about the direction you are heading. The fact is that many people don't ask any questions as they habitually guess their way by creating answers for themselves.
To become a millionaire, don't answer your questions, but question your answers. When you need to know the facts, you must inquire, not just make assumptions. Many people don't want to ask questions because it exposes them to confront the reality of their circumstance, which may scare them. Moreover, asking questions forces them into the laborious task of thinking, which is why they fail to ask questions. 
Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. -Voltaire

7. Become a Master

One time, a fine pianist performed at a party for 50 rich women. After she was done, a woman from the party said to the virtuoso, "I'd give anything to play as you do." As the master pianist sipped her coffee in slow motion, she took a brief pause and said, "Oh no you wouldn't." Soon, a great hush filled the room as they were baffled in astonishment and massive confusion.
She continued, "You'd give anything to play as I do, except time. You wouldn't sit and practice, hour after hour, day after day, year after years." Then she flashed a warm smile while repositioning her coffee cup. "Please understand, I'm not criticizing," she said. "I'm just telling you that when you say you'd give anything to play as I do, you don't really mean it. You really don't mean it at all."
Every master was once a disaster. -
T. Harv Eker

8. Embellish Your Appearance


Upgrading your appearance is instrumental to becoming a millionaire. Avoiding bad habits like drugs, tobacco, and excessive drinking of alcohol will always give you a more confident expression. By exercising four to five times per week, you are destined to become more physically attractive. You can easily beautify yourself by making minor changes to your appearances.
I have seen older men who apply mascara to their gray hairs. I know a woman who takes regular naps and occasionally sleeps 12 hours straight to avoid baggy eyes. Constantly embellish your appearance, even in the smallest ways, like shaving or applying cosmetics. Soon enough, you'll find more opportunities attracted to you. Looking like a millionaire is a best way to becoming one!

9. Doing the Maximum

The only element of success that you can control is your effort. Most people do minimum work, but expect maximum results. Instead of shirking the responsibilities of work, millionaires find better ways to achieve their goals. They go the extra mile to leverage themselves through people and systems, while using their efforts to optimize their talents.
Recently, we had more than three feet of snow, which requires tremendous effort to remove. My neighbor checked on me to see how I was doing. He was drenched in snow when he asked, "Aren't you going to come out and shovel?" I told him, "Nope, I hired someone to do it." When you maximize your efforts by focusing on how you can utilize your talents, you will dramatically increase your wealth. 
People pretend not like grapes when the vines are too high for them to reach. - Marguerite de Navarre

10. Obey the 'Rule of 500'

Early on in my business, I had a great struggle obtaining clients. It wasn't until I ran into the "Rule of 500" concept that changed my life. Basically, this habit taught me that if I wanted to become a millionaire, I would have to constantly reach out to a minimum of 500 people per month, either by phone or email. Knowing that I would face a lot of rejection, I was still willing to make it happen. 
Thankfully, I found that there are many ways to obtain a list of contacts. At first, you'll have to search diligently for these people who need your talent the most. When you grasp their attention with an email or phone call, you must move in with great initiative to offer your product or service. Obviously, not everyone will like you or what you offer, so be ready to face massive rejection. You'll be lucky if you have a 5 percent conversion rate when reaching out!

Good habits are as addictive as bad habits. Once you've adopted a good habit, keep gaining new ones. An average person develops 6-10 new habits per year, which also means that they are dropping 6-10 old habits! Regardless, think about your daily habits and how they affect you. And remember, you make your habits in the beginning, then your habits make you!