We Shape Our Lives, And We Shape Ourselves

The choices we make in our life are ultimately our own responsibility. In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. You must take personal responsibility because you cannot change the circumstances but you can change yourself.

You may believe that you are responsible for what you do, but not for what you think. The truth is that you are responsible for what you think, because it is only at this level that you can exercise choice. What you do comes from what you think because our life will always be to a large extent what we ourselves make it.

We do not do what we want, and yet we are responsible for what we are. We are responsible for our attitude towards the inevitable misfortunes that darken our life. Bad things do happen; how we respond to them defines our character.

Ninety-nine percent of failures come from people who have a habit of making excuses. Those who do not own the consequence of their actions. They let other suffer their own burden. They keep on making excuses to justify their actions but in reality they just don't want to take the blame for the outcome of their lives.

The choices we make and the decisions we take have a long-lasting impact on our life. The past is unalterable yet offers us lifelong lessons on the mistakes we made. The present is a gift we need to make the best of and our future comprises each and every decision we have ever taken.

Sometimes, we make bad choices and often suffer with misery and regret when we realize our mistake. We can't undo the past, but we can always learn from it. Choices are the building blocks of our lives and despite all the mistakes one makes, a new day brings with itself new opportunities and a whole new world of choices.

We become what we become because of the way we choose ourselves to think. Our choices affect our thoughts and our thoughts affect who we are, what we stand for, and the legacy we leave.

Throughout our lives, we are faced with endless choices. We may not always recognize their presence, but, we are constantly faced with the responsibility of deciding. There is no escaping this responsibility. Not deciding what to do or how to act in a given situation is, in itself, a choice.

Making choices also means accepting the idea that we are part of a bigger picture. We are not alone in our choices. Our choices affect not only ourselves, but the people around us. Our choices shape our actions which shape the opinions and feelings of those individuals and, ultimately, the actions they take for or against our behalf.

When we learn to shape our lives, we also learn to shape ourselves.

Our choices not only affect us today, but affect our abilities and our choices in the future. This choices can often lead us to escape from a challenge instead of confronting and possibly overcoming it.

https://ezinearticles.com/?We-Shape-Our-Lives,-And-We-Shape-Ourselves&id=9879427

Sorry, Not Sorry

Do you find that saying, "I'm sorry", is really hard for you, even when you are sorry? Or do you find yourself saying, "I'm sorry" often, even if there isn't anything to apologize for? Apologizing to others for something we have said, or not said, or something we perceive we have done, may significantly affect our relationships.

When Saying I'm Sorry Isn't an Apology

How we apologize to someone is critical. If our apology comes with an explanation, or an excuse, it's really not an apology. For example, if you phrase your apology such as, "I'm sorry that I yelled at you, but I didn't like what you said." This justification for your action is no apology.

A True Apology Comes from the Heart

An appropriate, heartfelt apology instead may sound something like, "I'm sorry I yelled at you. The way I treated you was not okay." This manner of apologizing demonstrates that we are owning our behavior instead of making excuses for it.

The Ineffective Apology

Another dynamic we may encounter in dealing with someone we really care for is when their apology is akin to the expression of crying wolf. The person apologizes, and may even mean it when they express regret, however, there isn't any follow through to work on the issue prompting the apology.

It's not an uncommon complaint in psychotherapy, or in couple therapy, that one partner may say they're sorry, however they continue to do the same thing repeatedly.

A pattern forms around the same issues, and after a while the partner, no longer feels that the apology matters. The ineffective apology is delivered repeatedly, but the person isn't working on the issue to resolve it. Thus, instead of the apology feeling good, it triggers frustration, anger or resentment because it doesn't feel like it means anything anymore.

The Excessive Apologizer

The other factor we may encounter is someone we care about who consistently apologizes or constantly says, I'm sorry.

"We shouldn't apologize for our own needs, but we should apologize for being thoughtless or careless." ~ Dr. Guy Grenier, Psychologist and Marital Therapist

What are some of the reasons that we may over apologize?

• For some it's a sense of not feeling good enough, or lacking a good sense of self-esteem.

The belief that everything they do is wrong, or not okay.

• Sometimes as children, or adolescents, apologizing for something, even if we didn't do it, is a way of protecting ourselves. If a child apologizes then they may ward off a punishment, criticism, or judgement. If that behavior is not worked through as an adult, that pattern continues.

• After a while saying I'm sorry may have become such a habit that we don't even realize we're saying it. It becomes so natural that it's like breathing.

• Saying I'm sorry may come from a place of tentativeness, or a lack of assuredness around what is happening and what is okay, and what isn't. This might be a conscious, or unconscious, way of warding off perceived criticism. If I say I'm sorry first, perhaps he/she won't ridicule or criticize me.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Sorry,-Not-Sorry&id=9649875

Ways To Change Your Life For A Better Future

For a better future take a panoramic view of your life and ask yourself if this is the quality of life you want to continue having.

Most people who have been asked what they've done to change their lives usually answer with something along lines, "It's too late now, my life is my life, and it is what is."

If you're asking yourself, "How do I change my life," or perhaps continually thinking, "I want to change my life," then you've got a great head start.

The primary step in getting out of the rut is to stop making excuses and presume responsibility for the quality of your life.

You can transform your life scenario today.

There will constantly be obstacles and struggles for how to improve your life, however none that can not be conquered for a better future.

The Course in Miracles teaches through its many spiritual metaphysical principles and lessons that, "We truly literally do have the power within us to move mountains."

An initial step for a better future is to getting out of the rut you're in now and step up into faith, and, as the Nike commercial says, "Just do it".

There is no time like the present to change course for a better future. Albert Einstein once said "Anyone who has never ever made a mistake has actually never tried anything new."

Transforming your life and how to improve your life begins with self-forgiveness.

Yes, I mean forgiving your past by letting go of it and going beyond it.

The Course in Miracles states, Forgiveness turns the world of sin into a world of glory, wonderful to see.

The Course in Miracles further teaches that we are not sinners and that our only guilt comes from thinking we have sinned. Errors we've made, yes.

So let go of the thought process that has you living amongst error.

How to improve your life means stepping out of what you do not want, and shifting your mind forward to what you do want.

Take an opportunity, and as William Durant, the founder of General Motors said "Forget past errors."

Start today, don't put it off, take action in getting out of the rut and let go of all excuses about what is holding you back and become responsible for the quality of your life and for a better future.

To improving your life and for a better future!

http://ezinearticles.com/?Ways-To-Change-Your-Life-For-A-Better-Future&id=9819000

Signs You Have Strong Personality That May Intimidate Some People

The most common misconception on people with a strong personality is they are unapproachable and mean. However, there is a thick line that separates being mean from being a strong person. Although these types of people may come on too strong and intimidating, they can be the nicest person you will ever meet if you try to scratch beneath the surface and find out who they truly are.

Unfortunately, only a few brave souls would dare speak with a person with a strong personality. Some perceptions stated on the original article are very common among people who are perceived to be more of a dominant person than a strong person. You may be deemed as someone who always likes to win but this is definitely not the case.

You do not have to win to be recognized as you are comfortable with who you are. You are strong because you do not need approval from other people.

You Don’t Put Up With Excuses

Strong personalities do not put up with excuses. When you have a strong personality, you’re not willing to listen to people waste time whining about what they can do. You would rather focus on what you can do and how you can overcome obstacles to do more.

Don’t question yourself for not making excuses. There might be a lot of reasons that you can’t do something but there are more reasons that you can.

You Are Careful About Who You Let Into Your Life

As a strong person, you do not rely on other people to tell you who you are, what you are or what you can do. You recognize that some people need to do that to make themselves feel better. You also recognize that some people need to hear these things to feel whole.

Even if you don’t yet know exactly who you are, you know that you do not need a boyfriend, girlfriend, boss, best friend or family member to tell you what you’re capable of. You can figure that out on your own.

You Hate Small Talk

Small talk is terrible. If you have a strong personality, you have a lot of ideas. You do not want to waste time talking about people when you could be changing the world.

You might feel like you are bad at small talk. But that is not true. Anyone can make small talk using free Arabic fonts. What you’re feeling is a discomfort because small talk wastes time and brain cells.

You Can’t Stand Insensitivity, Idiocy or Ignorance

Dominating personalities come from a lack of influence or knowledge. Strong personalities are the result of being thoughtful and well-informed. There is a huge difference between the two.

Because you have put time and effort into using your brain for good, you hate it when people make instant judgements about things they do not know anything about. This is probably your best quality but not because you can use your knowledge to influence people. It is because you can use it to encourage people to actually think about what they say before it falls out of their mouth.

http://www.howtothinkpositive.net/signs-you-have-strong-personality-that-may-intimidate-some-people/