Message From the Universe: Your Journey in Life

"You know how everyone is always talking about life being a journey, not a destination? And that it's the journey that really counts? That from it, you'll find your purpose, meaning, and true happiness?

Well, this is it.

Soak it in,

The Universe"

This quote is obvious to many who understand the principle of life being a journey. The destination is actually death. Many might disagree as saying that destination is when you have lived a fulfilled life and taking advantage of your hard work to appreciate the finest thing. Just like education or learning should have no end to it, life has really no destination. When one goal is fulfilled, another one should appear in the horizon for you to accomplish it. Destination is where you need to go to complete your voyage but is it really completed? When you travel to a destination, either for pleasure or business, arriving there doesn't mean the end. You head there to either have a vacation or for business deal or whatever else responsibilities. Once completed, you head back for another journey to finally arrive to that new or old previous destination. So what is more exciting? The journey to get to vacation or arriving at that destination? For many, they feel that the plane ride or driving to destination is exciting, fulfilling because of anticipation. That doesn't mean that when they do arrive, they get depressed. The endorphins kicks in because of the anticipation, which renders lots more excitement than actually arriving there.

Since consciousness remains AFTER death of the physical body, we all wonder if our journey to the unknown continues because of this theory. Once we die, does our mind feels that excitement of the many journeys ahead of us? Is there a final journey or a final destination? Since our consciousness can travel at the speed of light and visit billions of galaxies in our vast universe, can we approach this theory as allowing us to see above and beyond what theoretical physicist have been trying to prove, for many years, the string theory and parallel universes? Because of the complex nature of this subject, it is evident to say that no one in the medical industry have been able to literally separate consciousness from the actual brain, which in return, allows the medical field to say that both are intrinsically related and when one dies, the other does as well (means when physical brain dies, consciousness will follow). Despite the many research to prove the doctors wrong, including NDE (Near Death Experience), OBE (Out of Body experience), and the many other spiritual experiences that humans have shared, we can admittedly and with confidence say that consciousness remains and journeys are what makes life worth living. Happiness is found from within, and not from without. You dictate how you want to live your life and whatever journey you come across, make sure it is traveled with a purpose, a meaning and lots of excitement.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-Your-Journey-in-Life&id=9674703

How We Find Happiness in Life

Happiness is life's most desired goal. But we can never achieve it while we continue to look outside of ourselves, as it is an inside job.

"Happiness cannot be travelled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude".

Throughout our evolutionary journey we have tried every strategy imaginable and searched almost everywhere in our quest for true happiness. We have had some great experiences and learnt a lot along the way, but we have never found what we are searching for. Eventually, we grow tired of searching and turn our attention to the one place we haven't looked so far; inside ourselves. True happiness is not something that can be sought and acquired; it is our soul's natural state of being, and we can only connect with by going within.

Anything we do, it is simply our inner quality that we are going to spread. We cannot do anything of tremendous value for our planet until anything of accurate value occurs within us. Thus, if we want to be connected to the world, the first thing we must do is to transform ourselves right into a happy beings.

It doesn't matter what we do in our life, whether it is business, studying or giving assistance to someone or some cause, we're doing it because deep down, it gives us satisfaction. Each activity that every individual executes on this globe rises from a desire. We were not unhappy when we were a child, as joy and happiness is a source which resides within each one of us. So all we have to do, is to go for it and take charge of that joy which is residing in us.

Everything in universe is in order. The sun comes wonderfully well up in the sky. The flowers flourish beautifully, no stars falls along, and the galaxies are functioning perfectly. Today, the whole cosmos is occurring divinely well, but just a negative thought worming up on our brain enables us to believe that today is a poor day.

Suffering occurs basically when most human beings shed perception in regards of what this life is all about. Our emotional process become far larger than the existential procedure, or our petty creation become far more critical compared to GOD's Creations, to place it bluntly. This is the way to obtain all suffering. We miss the complete sense of what this means to be alive here. An emotion within us or a thought within our mind establishes the nature of the experience right now. And our thought may have nothing to accomplish even with the restricted reality of our lifestyle. The entire creation is happening beautifully well but just one considered emotion can ruin everything.

Anything we consider as "our mind" isn't ours basically. It is merely society's empty talk. Everyone and anyone whom we encounter on a daily base put some idea or information in our head and we truly have no choice about whose idea we accept or don't accept. These information are advantageous once we learn HOW TO process them and use them. This accumulation of opinions and information that we collect is simply useful for our survival on the planet. It is not something which is related to who we are.

First thing we need to do in the morning when we get up, is to smile. At whom? No one. Since just the fact that we have woke up is not a small matter. A lot of thousands of people who slept yesterday evening didn't wake up today. Isn't it great that we woke up? So look as you wake up, look around you, if there is someone, and then smile at them. Because this morning, for numerous people, someone precious to them didn't get up. Then venture out, take a deep breath and look at the bushes. They didn't die yesterday either.

You may think this is really funny, but you won't know its reality until someone dear to you doesn't wakeup. So don't wait until you understand the value of it. Appreciate what you have, be happy that you are alive and everyone who matters to you is still around.

Of course, people who do not have food or the basic needs for living can feel physically miserable and their needs must be addressed. Our duty as a human being is to help and take care of such people when we encounter them. But most people are unhappy not as a result of what they don't have. It is because they compare their life to others. You are driving on a motorbike, you see somebody in a Mercedes and you become unhappy. But for someone who is driving a bicycle, your motorbike seems like a limousine.

Life is about learning and appreciating what GOD has created for us on this plant. It is not about twisting and distorting it. When we rely on the external situation to make us joyful and content, we could never feel true happiness. The quality of our life doesn't depend on what car we drive, how much money we have in a bank account, or how big our house is, but how content and happy we feel inside.

Although each one of us is unique, and what works for one may not for other, but there are simply areas that tend to make a big difference to people's happiness in life; and crucially they are all areas that are within our control:

1 - Care for others genuinely: Caring genuinely for others around us is essential to our happiness. Being caring means wishing the best for others, and acknowledging in them the same wants, needs, aspirations, and even fears that we have too. It means providing a listening ear, noticing when someone needs help, and helping our community without asking for a reward. Being caring allows us to have empathy for others and to live a life based on affection, love, and compassion for the people around us.

2 - Connect with people: "Happiness is influenced not only by the people you know, but by the people they know". This means that by surrounding ourselves with happier people we become happier, we make the people close to us happier, and make the people close to them happier. People with strong and vast social relationships are happier, healthier and live longer. Close relationship with family and friends brings love, compassion, meaning and belonging into our lives and grow our sense of self-worth. "To touch the soul of another human being is to walk on holy ground" ~ Stephen Covey

3 - Notice the world around you: Taking Notice is about observing those things that we find beautiful and being mindful of them in our daily life. It can be easy to rush through life without stopping to notice much. Paying more attention to the present moment, to our own thoughts and feelings, and to the world around us; can improve our wellbeing. Becoming more aware of the present moment not only help us to enjoy the world around us more and understand ourselves better, but also recognize anew things that we have been taking for granted.

4 - Have something to look forward to: Happiness in anticipation is the key here. By having something to look forward to, no matter how our situations, bring happiness into our life, well before the circumstance happen. If your life is series of undesirable duties, commitments, and unpleasant tasks, take some time to find out something that YOU would find enjoyable. And make time to do it. "Happiness is the anticipation and the realization of the fulfilment of a dream".

5 - Avoid false beliefs and expectations: "Our authentic happiness is blocked by our false belief that life should be how we want it to be. The expectation that accompanies this false belief sets us up for disappointment, frustration, anger and unhappiness". Our expectations create our reality and they change our lives emotionally and physically. Unreasonable expectations can make life extremely hard and unhappy. These expectations are actually designed by our ego, as nothing give our ego a stronger sense of self-identity as an experience that supports our sad life-story. "In other words, we unconsciously create expectations so we can feel sad and disappointed when they are not met. Our ego is addicted to sadness and painful emotions". Master to drop all expectations and open your heart, begin to love yourself, and move beyond your ego. Embrace freedom from your ego.

6 - Be comfortable with who you are: Finding ourselves, our authenticity will help us to feel our beauty. When we endeavour to be who we are, to be true to ourselves, and accept ourselves with all our flaws and imperfections, we will automatically feel attractive and unique. Beauty is never dependent upon the approval of others. Quite the contrary, beauty is very much self-defined and self-created. "To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don't need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself." ~Thich Nhat Hanh. By accepting ourselves and becoming kinder to ourselves we will be able to see our shortcomings as opportunities to learn and grow.

7 - Find a purpose in life: We all have intact potential, perhaps even areas of intelligence, to become something entirely different, or somehow more than what we appear to be right now. People who find meaning and purpose in their lives are happier, feel more in control and get more out of what they do. They become less stressed, anxious, or depressed. But how do we find meaning and purpose in life? We're all wired differently. Some of us feel more connected to nature, others find meaning by employing in nurturing. The key is to know what works for us. Learning to live our purpose is essentially a spiritual exercise, and an inside job. Search how and what give you that sense of fulfilment and deep connection; and then peruse it in all that you do.

8 - Train yourself to be more positive: There is the positive aspect in everything, in every person, in every situation. Sometimes it's not obvious and we have to look hard. Even when we are faced with a difficult situation we can think to ourselves "What is good about this?" No matter how unpleasant the circumstance might look, we always can find something good if we take the time to think about it. Everything, good or bad is a learning experience. And there is always lesson to be gained from every bad experience. "There are moments when troubles enter our lives and we can do nothing to avoid them. But they are there for a reason. Only when we have overcome them will we understand why they were there" ~ Paulo Coelho

9 - Live Mindfully: "Life is not what it's supposed to be. It's what it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference" ~ Virginia Satir. Life is full of challenges. The way we manage them, can make a difference between whether we let them to control our lives, or we find a way to embrace every challenge as it arises. By practicing mindfulness we can find a more empowering way to react to the challenges life brings us. It also helps us to train our mind, manage our thoughts and feelings, and reduce stress and anxiety.

10 - Take care of your body: "Your body is precious. It is our vehicle for awakening. Treat it with care." ~Buddha. There is a powerful mind-body connection through which emotional, mental, social, spiritual, and behavioural factors can directly affect our health. Being active makes us happier as well as healthier. By spending time outdoors, eating healthy foods, and getting enough sleep, we can improve our wellbeing. A serene mind really is nothing without a healthy body to carry it, so show your body the same compassion that you show everyone, by taking care of it.

It is positively time now that we look inside of ourselves and see HOW TO produce personal wellbeing. From our own experience of life we can clearly observe that wellbeing will come to us when we change our perception on life. We need to realize, if we are determined to create our happiness and wellbeing by the outside factors it will never happens. As nothing will be %100 the way we want them to be. When we accept this fact, then we will be able to work on ourselves as an individual to become the person we want to be. And happiness will be our only choice which has been our authentic nature by creation in the first place. "Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it." ~ Greg Anderson

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-We-Find-Happiness-in-Life&id=9498997

How To Remain Humble When Facing Success

When facing success, knowing how to remain humble often seems, for many, like a challenging task. It is quite a common trait to see among some high achievers who after years of constant effort chasing their dream, and being successful, suddenly let success go to their head and get the best of them.

Why is this happening? Whatever happened to being humble? Why do many successful people forget where they came from? Are people considering humility as a weakness or strength?

Well, learning to remain humble in the face of success can master both the fact of getting lost in too much pleasure-seeking and having a big head. People are letting their ego in the way often think they are so unique and special. When becoming successful, there is nothing wrong with purchasing luxurious things to live a better life, but when you start to do it just to show off, it becomes egocentric.

You let go of the ethics and values that have made you who you are and ignore people who have helped you reach success. Afterwards, you even come to believe that you are an expert in all that is presented to you. Fortunately, being humble can cut your ego on the spot to keep what you worked so hard to achieve.

Luckily, not all successful people treat success in the same way. The truth is that some people who reach achievement remain humble, no matter what they have. They never forget who they are or from where they came.

Humility and Arrogance

Some high achievers have fun from being arrogant about their achievements or being pretentious about their wealth. They somehow believe that they are better than anyone else. In truth, some individuals let success give them a big head, and they seem to have a strange pleasure from degrading others around them.

To not remain humble is very sad indeed. In contrast, I notice that just as it is not nice for some successful people to look down on others, it is also wrong for people who have not succeeded to dislike the ones who have sweat through hard work and have reasonably created their success.

So many successes come from small beginnings. You, I or anyone can also make something of themselves through the quest, chase and hunt of cheer determination, belief, knowledge, reliability, diligence, and opportunity. So, when you do, you have every right to be proud of the success that you achieved. But does it give you the right to be insolent or disrespectful to others? Of course not!

A Great Life Balance is to Remain Humble

Money does not make you a better person unless you work on yourself and remain humble. True happiness is realized by being grateful and appreciating what you already have. As success comes, no one should forget loved ones or real friends who stood by you during struggles.

Allow yourself to have the right balance at work as well as in life, a great home, good karma or even another chance in life. A great future does not require a great past. And humility can be the tool that balances it all.

So, remain humble, and do not let success go to your head. Having humility is a mark of strength, and not of weakness. Being humble will give you inner peace. It will keep you grounded in your principles, ethics, and beliefs so that you have nothing to prove to anyone else but yourself. You will feel comfortable in your skin, and silently modest and proud.

How to Remain Humble

Successful and humble people know on what to focus. They listen to others instead of talking about themselves, give rather than take, provide praise rather than holding credit to themselves, and know that there is more which they have to learn in life.

But to remain humble, you also have to not take yourself completely off the scene. So, you have to use the right balance.

Humility is Sharing Credit and Not Boasting

When you get credit, just give thanks and tell the person that you enjoyed doing your share of the work. And also provide the credit to the individual or team you work with if you did so.

To Remain Humble is Knowing How to Listen

When you remain humble, it does not mean you have to be a passive doormat or agree with someone. If you ask questions, learn and know how to listen to the responses given to you. Your way is not the only way of thinking or doing. So when someone shares an opinion or experience with you, take a moment before you speak.

Humility is Sharing What You Know with Others

You should never be afraid to share your knowledge. Reveal some of what you know so that others may grow and progress. Spend thirty percent of your time with people who know less than you and teach. Help them if you see something they don't know anything about.

Being Humble is Treating Everyone Equally

I noticed that people who remain humble are usually kind, caring, attentive, and courteous to everyone they come across. The people, who listen to your ideas, indeed make an effort to remember tiny details about you. They greet you and smile whenever you cross paths with them. So learn to be like them.

Remain Humble and Let Other People Brag

I am pretty sure you have encountered conceited individuals, and perhaps your competitive side did get the best of you, and so you ended up trying to prove yourself. But it is a waste of time and energy, and you should not care about what they think.

I realized that successful, humble people never get into these kinds of power plays. Rather than responding, you should smile, say okay, and let the individual have his or her moment. This way, the bragger is satisfied and less likely to go on and on.

So to remain humble, you have to maintain the perfect balance between humility and confidence.

Tips to Remain Humble When Facing Success

• When you become successful, do not rest on your laurels. As soon as you lose focus, you risk losing your edge.
• Learn another language. It is a great way to remain humble and a prodigious reminder of whom else exists in the world.
• Always remember your roots and where you came from. Think of what you have learned along the way. And do not forget to teach others what you know.
• Stay away from giving into your ego and feeding it.
• Try living without comforts and ease for one day or better yet one week. It will magnify appreciation for others who have less.
• Always grow. Know your limits and admit when you do not know something. Even experts still have to remain humble and learn.
• Compete only with yourself. When you try to compete against others, it is not improving but ego. But when you compete with yourself, you gain more growth and success.
• Learn to nurture patience and prevent selfishness.
• Listen to others and discover what they have to offer. It shows that you value their opinions as well as their understanding.
• Be swift and apologize for your mistakes. Do not let success get to your head. Remaining humble will remind you that you are only human and not perfect.
• Share your success. Remember that other people helped you along the way or were there during your struggles. So share the credit and take these people up the ladder of success along with you.
• Earn trust and a good reputation through your words and actions. Integrity is more valuable in life than anything else.
• Remain humble by getting off your high horse. Learn to treat everyone with dignity and respect.
• Learn that enjoyment and bragging are different. Be thrilled about your new "toy," but do not brag about it relentlessly. Be sensitive, be humble and be grateful.

My Last Thought to Remain Humble

Pay attention to and express gratitude for the beauty and wonder this world has to offer. Do not take what is around you for granted, but rather respect it. Recognize that you are a living miracle and a part of the universe.

My last thought is that it is important to remain humble, but that there is nothing wrong with feeling a sense of pride or achievement for a job well done when facing success. It is marvelous to make the right choices and take great opportunities that lead to success. But do not be conceited.

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Remain-Humble-When-Facing-Success&id=9813831

The Divine Connection Between Spirituality and Money

It is important to remain aware of the fact that you can still be spiritual and make more money. Simply because you want to manifest more money doesn't mean that you have to sacrifice yourself spiritually. Matter of fact it should be the opposite. Manifesting more money should only enhance the amazing qualities you have as a spiritual individual. And what I am referring to when I write a spiritual individual is someone who states that spirituality is a very important part of his or her life.

Those of us who are spiritually enlightened should see money as more than something that is related to material riches because we are already spiritually rich, and therefore we understand that money can never buy true happiness and neither is money the sole source of true wealth. We understand that money is needed to buy essentials for life, but we know that more money means we can help more people, charities, and causes that we care about. We understand that we can buy necessities and help more people with money, but we also know that our happiness is not connected to anything monetary. Our happiness and fulfillment comes from the things that money can't buy. But yet we understand that it is not wrong to want to live a more abundant life financially.

There is a divine connection between spirituality and money but many people never make the connection so they continue to believe that spirituality and money are separate. They go through life day after day, month after month, and year after year believing that financial prosperity and spirituality are working against one another when in actuality they are working together. Once we understand how spirituality and money are connected we can begin to see major shifts happen in our life. I believe that we all deserve to live a more prosperous life.

I don't know if you have ever been in a position where you had to struggle financially. I mean REALLY struggle financially. Well I have, and it is not a good feeling at all. It not just affects you financially, but it affects you physically, emotionally, and mentally. And it can also affect you spiritually. I believe that there are many of us who desire to go to the next level financially, and I also believe that going to the next level financially is actually a part of the divine design for our life. What you believe you will receive. But you must also take action. It is what you do in the middle of believing and receiving that manifests results.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Divine-Connection-Between-Spirituality-and-Money&id=9558365

Pursuing Happiness In An Evolving World (By Benita B Jenkins)

I have had so many setbacks over the past two years, I went from losing my job that was my major income to almost nothing. The anxiety hit me hard, how was I going to provide for me and my family being the sole provider, a single mother of three. I knew I had to move really fast because time waits for no one. I was filling out applications. making myself known, I landed a part-time job. The income was lousy but I started realizing all the time I had worked overtime, missing school concerts, field days, just being there for my girls.

The pain of reality start setting in. I had made some haste decisions the job paid good, had great benefits, but that's what we work for. I was losing my identity and would have still been lost but change came and predestined me back on the right path. The all American dream but it was costing me to give up my rights as a mother. I was not giving that title that I earned away. Yes it has been many ups and downs but the accomplishments I see in them is worth it!

I found out quickly that I loved being at home when my girls got home from school, engaging in them about what their day was like, all the talk about who and what boys liked them, it all started to make perfect sense. I was starting to get back to me. I enjoyed cooking and having them come home and tell me how good it smelled, how great the food tasted. I thought wow! they really enjoy my cooking if the potato salad gets gone in one day. I was feeling on top the world. I was starting to feel like myself again. I attended Christiana's concert to hear her voice, all the other kids voices it was like listening to angels singing.

I felt overjoyed, tears spurted in my eyes, I realized what I had been missing and they were truly a part of my happiness. I had to work but I was neglecting so much of what they needed in me or maybe what I needed from them. I realized how happy we were eating that Sunday dinner together. The macaroni cheese, rolls, mashed potatoes, green beans, chicken. The tradition when were younger the family came together to pray and eat together. Things were becoming clearer and clearer this is where I am supposed to be. Of course I had to make some drastic changes but I am happy.

We spend a lot of time together, shopping, talking, laughing, disagreeing, but isn't that how it supposed to be. What I thought was the biggest loss turned out to be my biggest gain. It has led me down this road where I get to do what I love most, writing, singing, being there for the people I love. Oftentimes we don't understand why things happen the way they do but there is always some newfound happiness that awaits us.

The choices, the commitments, and the decisions all affect one another. I was in a situation where I had to work but I had not properly counted the cost. The cause and effect were present. I had to redirect my steps get a whole new outlook. Sometimes we are pushed into our destiny by a tragic incident.

They also have the best advice and can be very good judges of character if you listen, and they are brutally honest! They are very brilliant and their minds are capable of going higher than we can comprehend. My best investment is in them. Take time to find out what intrigues them. Find out their favorite subjects and what they love about it, amazing. Happiness derives from many various things.

A lot of times we have to give up a lot of things that are preventing us from true happiness. Life became so much sweeter, I was able to just wake up and think which I had not done in a while in a quiet place in the solitude of my conscious.. My old job was so consuming it had robbed me of all the joys that I enjoyed doing. Of course I cannot go back, but I can live each moment I have focusing on our happiness and living life they way it is supposed to be! As I sit here looking out my window typing, I have such a peace, at home with my family.

I have always learned that the lessons that our parents taught us, and their parents, our grandparents will never leave us. They have instilled morals, values, and ethics that build our character, the foundation of who we are and who we will become to society. Are we living or are we existing? I decided that I would live! you can never forget all the knowledge and wisdom that was passed from generation to generation and it still works. We always have a roadmap, a compass, navigation system if we lose our way. God is one, Family, and the people that we spend the most time with that know us eternally that stirs up the passion to live life as we have never lived before.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Pursuing-Happiness-In-An-Evolving-World&id=9662538

The Real Happiness in Life

What is happiness? Where do we find it? How do we obtain it? I readily concede that it's important to have sufficient money for our needs, but beyond that, money has little to do with true happiness.

Happiness is the most intangible state we are seeking in our whole lives. In our pursuit of real happiness in life, we experienced too much pain and sacrifices.There are even times when we lose our own source of happiness. But, there are only a few who knew that real happiness lies within ourselves.

Happiness does not always require success, prosperity or attainment. Real happiness ever has its root in unselfishness-its blossom in love of some kind. The present is an age of pleasure-seeking, and men are losing their sanity in the mad rush for sensations that do but excite and disappoint. In this day of counterfeits, adulterations, and base imitations, the devil is busier than he has ever been in the course of human history, in the manufacture of pleasures, both old and new; and these he offers for sale in most attractive fashion, falsely labeled, 'Happiness.

What is happiness then? How does it differ from mere pleasure? Happiness leaves no bad aftertaste, it is followed by no depressing reaction; it calls for no repentance, brings no regret, entails no remorse; pleasure too often makes necessary repentance, contrition, and suffering; and, if indulged to the extreme, it brings degradation and destruction.

True happiness is lived over and over again in memory, always with a renewal of the original good; a moment of unholy pleasure may leave a barbed sting, which, like a thorn in the flesh, is an ever-present source of anguish. Happiness is not akin with levity, nor is it one with light-minded mirth.

It seems happiness is something we all desire but few find. Is it a career? Is happiness in our 'stuff'? Looking for happiness in things will never satisfy. In the end, we find ourselves just looking further.

Just don't take yourself too seriously. True perfection is really accepting your imperfections. In this way, you're not struggling with or rejecting yourself. Make friends with yourself. Never beat yourself down because of too many emotional issues. It is natural to feel everything, whatever it may be.

Try to meditate. There is an overwhelming amount of research showing how meditation changes the circuits in the part of the brain associated with contentment and happiness and stimulates the "feel-good" factor. Meditating on love and kindness makes you much, much happier! And the only way to know this is to try it, so don't hesitate. It has been proven that even as little as 10 minutes of meditation a day can lead to physical changes in the brain that improve concentration and focus, calm the nervous system, and help you to become more kind and compassionate, and even more humorous.

Let go of negativity. Learn to forgive and forget. See every challenge as an opportunity for further growth. Express gratitude for what you have. Don't worry about the little things. Take plenty of "worry vacations" where you train your mind not to worry for a certain length of time.

See the humor in life and in our experiences. Take life less seriously and learn to laugh at yourself. Serve and be kind to others. Treat everyone with kindness. Speak well of others. Truly listen to others. Support them without bringing yourself into it. Be careful with your words. Speak gentler, kinder, and wiser. Respect others and their free will. Put your trust in others and be trusted in return.

Work as part of a whole. See others as partners in your efforts. Practice generosity and giving without expecting anything in return. Live in the present. Don't replay negative events or worry about the future. Accept and celebrate impermanence. Be grateful for your life, for each moment of every day.

Observe yourself in the moment. Choose a healthy lifestyle. Keep a daily routine. Wake up at the same time every morning, preferably early. Get enough sleep. Don't overeat and try to practice healthy self-control. Exercise daily to the point of sweating.

Laugh more. Laughter is the best medicine. Practice deep breathing and yoga. The body and mind are connected. Take care of your spirit. Strive to always learn new things. Get creative.

Be inwardly free. Live minimally and simply. Often extravagant living brings more stress, not more satisfaction. De-clutter your home to de-clutter your mind. Feel good in your own home. Make it your sanctuary by keeping it clean, organized, and uplifting. Go without certain things you think you need.

Most people spend their lives waiting for happiness because they are misinformed. In order to find true happiness in life, you need to work on yourself and make a few adjustments to the way you live your life.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Real-Happiness-in-Life&id=9706182

Create Your Own Happy Destiny, Let These Tips Teach You How!

Being truly happy in life is something everyone wants, but due to how busy our world has become, we forget about what true happiness is. Lately, we've been revolving too much on material things, thinking that getting the latest gadget or the nicest clothes are what can make us happy.

We forget about spending time with our loved ones, about enjoying the untouched beauty of nature and the outdoors, making other people smile... these simple things that give us the feeling of accomplishment, of self-worth, and of course, of happiness.

If we get too absorbed with gadgets, fashion, trends, and all that stuff that usually just provides temporary happiness, we lose track of creating our own happy destiny. That being said, allow us to help you get back on track towards your happy destiny through these tips:

Most of us think that happiness springs from achieving a goal or getting rewards, but researches from a Swedish university Gothenburg University indicate that these only provide a temporary high. After the initial excitement of winning or attaining something, we shortly go back to being unsatisfied and sometimes even unhappy. That being, what does make people happy? The Gothenburg University researchers found that it's putting a lot of effort and working hard is what make people feel happier and more fulfilled. Despite how hard work is usually associated with stress and therefore unhappiness, it feels a lot more rewarding achieving something through hard work than from taking the easy way in. Dr. Bengt Bruelde, lead researcher in this study, even stated that 'People who were most active got the most joy. It may sound tempting to relax on a beach, but if you do it for too long, it stops being satisfying.' That being said, never let mediocrity tempt you into doing things the easy way, you'll find happiness by working hard!

United Healthcare once did a study on people who did volunteer work for just a few hours every week. Now, there are people who have the passion for volunteering, others may think it's too much effort and time consuming. To those of you who don't volunteer, the United Healthcare research actually found their participants to be 73% less stressed, and 96% happier. Certain psychologists have come around calling this feeling the 'helper's high', a kind of happiness once feels when they know they have helped someone else. Another scientific explanation behind this is when you do a good deed, mood-boosting chemicals called oxytocin and dopamine are released into your system. Want to increase your chances of having a happy destiny? You can start by being open to helping others out, whether it be a friend, a family member, or even a total stranger!

To have a happy destiny you also need to make time for going out into the outdoors, more specifically somewhere where you are surrounded by nature. This is most important for people who live in highly urbanised areas and are constantly surrounded by the stresses of city life. A study from the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health published in 2009 even indicated that the closer one lives with nature, the healthier and happier they are. They studied medical records of 345,143 Dutch people, some who lived near nature or a green space and some who lived further away. They found that people who lived closer are less susceptible to depression and anxiety, while these were more prevalent in people who lived further away from any form of nature. If you don't want to become one of the latter category of people, try going out more into greener environments and leaving all the city business behind! Better yet, you can start living in a place much closer to any form of beautiful greenery, such as a park.

Work hard, help others, and immerse yourself in nature every once in a while, these are only three examples of what you can do to reach a happy destiny. There are plenty other things you can do, but you can start off with these first!

http://ezinearticles.com/?Create-Your-Own-Happy-Destiny,-Let-These-Tips-Teach-You-How!&id=9308217

7 Tips to Get Rid of Social Anxiety

I sat at the end of the sofa. This is the spot I’d been in all night watching people move around the room, and listening to whomever chose to sit next to me talk. This is how I used to inhibit a party. Motionless and quiet, waiting for just the right moment to hurry home.

This was not just my way of dealing with parties. It reflected the way I dealt with much of my life. Too afraid to show the world who I really was, I’d try my best to stay quiet and still. Don’t say too much. Don’t laugh too loudly. Don’t let them know you are anxious. Don’t let them notice that you are different.

Do you ever think you might be the only one whose heart races at the thought of going to a large social gathering? Do you ever wonder if anyone else’s voice shakes when too many people are listening to her talk? Do you ever feel like you’re the only one who would rather not attend a party?

For much of my life I thought I was the only one. Then one day I noticed the slight unsureness in the voice of an acquaintance as he addressed the room at a social event, and I thought maybe he feels it too. I noticed it again as I sat in a fast food restaurant alone eating and I saw a woman I worked with pull into the drive through window to order her lunch and pull into a parking space to sit alone in her car eating. I wondered if she felt it too?

I was an anxious, scared child who grew up to be an anxious, scared adult. The source of much of my anxiety was dealing with social situations.

When you have social anxiety you can feel like you’re alone? Other people put on such brave faces you might wonder how they do it. You might assume that they have never experienced this before, but more people are anxious in social situations than you realize.

My natural tendency is to become a kind of recluse. I could stay in the house for days and see no one and be fine with that. That life is easy, and safe, and tempting to me, but it is too easy. With such ease comes unhappiness.

As human beings we need to be challenged. The pursuit of true happiness requires that we stretch and grow to push ourselves just a bit further than we ever have before. That need to grow and push myself is why I started trying to work my way past my social anxieties.

At first I simply tried to will myself to feel more at ease around people. I made goals to engage in more conversation, but that just made me feel stressed and sad. I was fighting my introverted nature too much. There is nothing wrong with being quiet, as long as that quiet doesn’t come from a place of shame.

I realized that I had to work on my confidence first. Being an introvert wasn’t really the problem. The problem was not feeling like I was good enough. Here are some ways you can build your confidence in life in general and help you rid yourself of social anxiety.

Accept who you are. We are all different. Some of us are extroverts and some are introverts. In our society, it seems as though being an extrovert is more desirable, but in reality both introverts and extroverts are necessary. One is not better than the other. They are simply different.

As an introvert you’re keeping company with the likes of Bill Gate, Albert Einstein, JK Rowling, Abraham Lincoln, Gandhi, Rosa Parks, Audrey Hepburn and countless others. Being an introvert doesn’t mean you have a disadvantage in life. If you don’t have a lot to say in a conversation that’s fine. Most people really want to be listened too anyway, and you can be a very good listener.

Challenge yourself. Like I said before we need to learn and grow to be happy. Try new experiences. Learn about a new subject. Challenge your fears.

I was very much afraid of speaking in public so I decided to join a Toastmasters group. The first speech I made was terrifying, but it’s gotten easier with time. Now I feel much more confident about my ability to speak in front of others.

Feel the fear and do it anyway. Yes, sometimes we have good reasons to feel afraid, but social situations aren’t usually one of them. Putting myself in a situation where I was speaking in front of a group on a regular basis helped me tremendously. I can’t say that I’m no longer afraid of speaking in public, but I am a lot more comfortable with that nervous feeling that speaking in public gives me. I know it well and am able to ride it out.

Be mindful and present. Pay attention to what’s going on around you. A lot of the times anxiety consists of worrying about things that haven’t happened yet and may never happen. Pay attention to the moment and let the future happen. Being present in the moment will help you interact much more effectively with others.

Dress the part. Wearing clothes that make you feel good actually gives you a boost in confidence. Wear clothes that you really like. I used to have a closet of clothes I didn’t like. Then I realized that dressing differently naturally made me stand up a bit straighter and feel better about myself.

Visualize. When you’re feeling anxious about a social situation normally you sit about thinking about how it could go horribly wrong before the event. Stop that. Start doing just the opposite. Visualize how it could go incredibly well.

Realize you’re not the only one. There are lots of people who feel a bit anxious in social situations. I’m sure you’re not the only one in the room.

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/7-tips-get-rid-social-anxiety/

8 Choices for Making a Happier Life

I’m a big fan of Malcolm Gladwell.  His particular genius for collecting data and weaving together fresh insights has produced a wealth of practical wisdom to help us improve the quality of our lives.

But nobody’s perfect.

I recently came across Mr. Gladwell’s 2004 Ted Talk, in which he recounted the career of one Howard Moskowitz, a psychophysicist whose market research for Pepsi Cola, Vlasic Pickles, and Prego Spaghetti Sauce — beginning back in the early 70s — changed the food industry forever. It might seem obvious to us with the wisdom of hindsight but, to make a long story short, Howard Moskowitz discovered that there is no perfect pickle, no ideal type of cola, and no universal favorite recipe for spaghetti sauce.

How big a deal was this?  I’ll let Mr. Gladwell explain:

Everyone else in the industry looked at what Howard had done, and they said, “Oh my God! We’ve been thinking all wrong!” And that’s when you started to get seven different kinds of vinegar, and 14 different kinds of mustard, and 71 different kinds of olive oil. And then eventually even Ragù hired Howard, and Howard did the exact same thing for Ragù that he did for Prego. And today, if you go to a really good supermarket, do you know how many Ragùs there are? 36! In six varieties: Cheese, Light, Robusto, Rich & Hearty, Old World Traditional — Extra-Chunky Garden.

All well and good.  Now we can all have exactly what we like all the time, without sacrifice, without compromise, without effort.

But then Mr. Gladwell continues, moving on from tomato sauce to mustard:

And instead of charging a dollar fifty for the eight-ounce bottle, the way that French’s and Gulden’s did, they decided to charge four dollars. And they had those ads. With the guy in the Rolls Royce, eating the Grey Poupon. Another pulls up, and says, “Do you have any Grey Poupon?” And the whole thing, after they did that, Grey Poupon takes off! Takes over the mustard business!

And everyone’s take-home lesson from that was that the way to make people happy is to give them something that is more expensive, something to aspire to. It’s to make them turn their back on what they think they like now, and reach out for something higher up the mustard hierarchy…

That is the final, and I think most beautiful lesson, of Howard Moskowitz: that in embracing the diversity of human beings, we will find a surer way to true happiness.

And it is here that Malcolm Gladwell takes the off ramp from the highway of reason and turns onto the backstreets of phantasmagoria.

HAPPINESS OR DELIRIUM?

When Thomas Jefferson penned his famous dictum asserting our inalienable right to the pursuit of happiness, was he talking about our choice of mustard?  Is a perfectly brewed cup of coffee the ultimate means whereby we make ourselves, in Mr. Gladwell’s words, “deliriously happy”?  And as for aspiring to pay more for a product because an accented actor in a Rolls Royce implants in our minds a subliminal connection between a condiment and sophistication — is this a symptom of a truly happy, psychologically healthy society?

I could pontificate on these questions ad nauseum.  But, fortunately, I have someone else who can do it for me.

As it happened, I came upon psycho-economist Sheena Iyengar’s own Ted Talk from 2010 almost immediately after I found Malcolm Gladwell’s.  Although I doubt it was intended as a rebuttal, that’s exactly what it turned out to be.

Dr. Iyengar describes her surprise upon discovering that recent immigrants from former communist countries did not see a choice between seven kinds of soda as a choice at all; rather, they saw one single choice: soda.

So who is better off?  The person who has many choices, or the person who doesn’t see a need to choose?

Dr. Iyengar explains it this way:

When someone can’t see how one choice is unlike another, or when there are too many choices to compare and contrast, the process of choosing can be confusing and frustrating. Instead of making better choices, we become overwhelmed by choice, sometimes even afraid of it. Choice no longer offers opportunities, but imposes constraints. It’s not a marker of liberation, but of suffocation by meaningless minutiae. In other words, choice can develop into the very opposite of everything it represents…

She goes on to suggest that we reconsider three basic assumptions about choice:

• It is always good to make your own choices.
• More options lead to better choices.
• You must never say no to choice.

If we are choosing between irrelevancies, if we are overwhelmed with options, or if we don’t have enough information to choose wisely, does it make any sense at all to conclude that we’re better off just because we have the right and the opportunity to choose?

Dr. Iyengar adds:

A number of my studies have shown that when you give people 10 or more options when they’re making a choice, they make poorer decisions, whether it be health care, investment, or other critical areas. Yet still, many of us believe that we should make all our own choices and seek out even more of them.

Which brings us back to Malcolm Gladwell, and to Thomas Jefferson.

OVERWHELMED BY OPPORTUNITY

Have you ever stood irresolutely in the supermarket aisle trying to determine whether this brand was better than that brand, whether the big box was worth the savings-per-ounce over the small box, whether it was worth the risk to choose an unknown product that you might love or might hate over sticking with a brand that you know that you like?

Have you ever felt that your life would be much simpler if the market gave you fewer choices?  And have you actually tried all 36 brands of spaghetti sauce to make sure that the one you finally settle on is the one you like best?

Even if you have, can you honestly say that now you’re happier?

Thoughtful reflection suggests just the opposite.  When we have more choices, we also have higher expectations of getting exactly what we want, a lower tolerance for imperfection, and a more persistent feeling that we’ve missed out on a better choice.

For my part, I can honestly say that one of the most memorable meals I ever had was at a medieval banquet.  There was no menu, everyone was served the same courses, and they were all delicious.

Dr. Iyengar went on to explain what happened when women were given a choice between two shades of pink nail polish.  Half of them thought they were being tricked — that both shades were actually the same — and the other half chose one way when the bottles had labels and the opposite way when they did not.  The attractiveness of the respective hues could not compete with the superior branding of “Ballet Slipper” pink over “Adorable” pink.

So are we all condemned to remain victims of too many meaningless choices, or is there something we can do about it?

Let’s start by translating Dr. Iyengar’s challenged assumptions into action.  By doing so, we can arm ourselves with a list of criteria to check off whenever a legion of choices comes storming over the horizon.

1. Does it really matter?  If I have to look too closely to tell the difference between two shades of nail polish, five styles of shoes, or 27 kinds of toothbrushes, chances are that I won’t notice the difference one way or the other after I’ve made my choice.  So why am I agonizing over how to choose?
2. Am I missing anything?  Madison Avenue tries to seduce us with adjectives like fresh, new, improved, better, premium, unique, and exclusive.  But as my father often said:  “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”  If I haven’t been missing anything up until now, why should I go searching for something else?
3. Am I buying into a false comparison? Professor Dan Gilbert points out that the same people who would pay $1600 for a Hawaiian vacation discounted from $2000 would pass on the same vacation for $1500 if they had just missed a special that offered it for $1000.  In other words, “a good deal that was once a great deal is not nearly so attractive as an awful deal that was once a horrible deal.”  Look at the choice itself, not the choices all around it.
4. What if I don’t choose?  Will there be any consequences, good or bad?  Is there someone more qualified, more objective, or more informed to make the choice?  And if no choice gets made at all, will anyone notice?
5. Am I overwhelmed with options?  When too many choices start to blur together, an overloaded mind almost guarantees choosing poorly.  Start with a process of elimination by weeding out the worst alternatives first.  If you can get down to a manageable number, then you can think about deciding.  If not, sleep on it.
6. Am I being impatient? Again, Professor Gilbert points to research that most people will choose $50 now over $60 a month from now, but choose $60 in 13 months over $50 in 12 months.  If we can wait later, we should be able to wait now.  But immediate gratification distorts our reasoning.
7. Am I thinking rationally?  Emotions play a disproportionate role in many of our decisions.  When I feel my hormones, my endorphins, or my impulse for immediate gratification kicking in, it’s time for a time out.  If all else fails, call a friend whom you’ve prepped to act as your rational anchor. Alternatively, carry a pair of handcuffs at all times so you can lock yourself to the nearest parking meter.
8. Do I have enough information to choose wisely?  When it comes to big decisions, like college, marriage, and presidential elections, do I know what I’m committing myself to?  This is often a corollary of Number 7, since a flood of emotions easily blinds us to our own ignorance as well as our own impetuosity.  Choosing out of ignorance is a synonym for stupidity.

A healthy dose of reality always makes for the best possible choice — even if that means making fewer choices from fewer options.  In the end, we will likely discover that by choosing less we will end up with more time, more peace of mind and, yes, more happiness.

One more thing:  be careful not to let yourself be swayed by those who insist, like Starbucks, that “Happiness is in your choices.”

That’s their choice.  As for me — I take my coffee black.

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/6-choices-making-happier-life/