Set Your Intention for A Great First Impression (By Madeline Frank)

When is the last time you consciously set out to make a fantastic first impression? We often think of first impressions as something we deploy for job interviews and first dates, however, your road to excellence and success (no matter how you define success) is paved with the conscious efforts of making a series of great impressions.

Recently, I was invited to speak to one of the largest and top performing real estate companies in Virginia. The audience was a mixture of seasoned pros and eager new representatives.

One exercise I frequently do with most audiences is I ask them to imagine they are about to perform at Carnegie Hall in New York City. They are some of the top musicians in the world, and are about to perform a symphony to a sold-out audience.

What do you think would happen if they took the stage wearing workout clothes instead of formal wear? Would that affect the audience's perception of them?

For tonight's performance, we are summoning the legendary Frank Sinatra. I have had the honor of personally playing with Frank Sinatra, and one element that the entire orchestra agreed upon was that he intentionally set out to make a staggeringly awesome first impression.

Frank Sinatra walked out on stage with a big smile on his face, standing tall and fit, wearing a black tuxedo that fit him to perfection. He made eye contact with his audience, making them feel as if he were singing to them in his living room and they were honored guests. The audience were mesmerized by Sinatra.

One success example that everyone could use in their world today is to simply smile and dress in clothes that fit you. Also, stand or sit tall, don't slouch.

Tap into your Internal "Wow"

I asked my audience to imagine that they had just sold a half million-dollar property. (and earned a nice commission since they are Realtors).

Every one of them stood with their shoulders back, they made direct eye contact, and they spoke with clear enthusiasm.

The way you carry yourself creates a picture in people's mind. Your prospects don't know if you have sold everything you've touched in the past 72 hours or if you feel like you couldn't close a ziplock bag at this moment... other than the way you present yourself.

Takeaway from this example: Practice carrying yourself in a confident manner.

Becoming a conscious complimenter.

One of the best illustrations of the power of compliments came from Dr. George W. Crane's psychology class at Northwestern University. Dr. Crane believed in the application of his teachings, not just in the memorization of his lessons.

He created the Compliment Club. Every day his students were to pay an honest compliment to each of three different persons... for 30 consecutive days. He also had the students journal the experiences.

Dr. Crane required the students write a theme paper about their experiences. He wanted them to note the changes they noted in the people around them, as well as how this experience altered their own outlook.

The students realized that by consciously complimenting others, they were motivated, encouraged, and inspired as well. Dr. Crane believed that appreciative words are the most powerful force for good on earth.

Everyone in life needs positive encouragement to help them grow, inspire and motivate them to succeed.

Take away: compliment 3 people every day for the next week and notice how your life improves.

You will also notice that the more you compliment, the better you will connect with others.

Everyone loves to talk about themselves. Asking the right questions of the people you encounter on a daily basis will deepen your relationship with them and will also help uncover a few "undercover customers".

No matter what your job, maintain a positive attitude, think taller, dress well, compliment someone every day, and journal what happens each day!

Training yourself to give honest compliments to others is a fabulous door opener for your success. By talking to people, you otherwise would not talk to, you will be expanding your circle and building new and stronger relationships.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Set-Your-Intention-for-A-Great-First-Impression&id=10210633

How to Give a Winning First Impression Now

How to give a winning first impression now and every time can be learned. Here are 5 "how to" tips to give a positive first impression.

When it comes to modern-day society and life, whether you are in a business meeting or a social encounter, your very first impression is incredibly important.

When people first meet you, they will judge and remember you by that mental picture they take.

Many people make first impression mistakes without even knowing it. In this post, we share five key how to tips to help you give a winning first impression now.

Tip #1: Give a Winning First Impression Start With a Smile 

The very first thing you should do to make people comfortable around you is to smile.

A smile takes away tension. It tells other people that you are happy. Smiles help people feel comfortable. Smiles are contagious!

Smiling exudes self-confidence. So when you first meet someone, smile.

Tip #2: Dress for the Occasion 

The second way to give a winning first impression is to dress for the occasion.

You do not have to go out and buy the latest, most expensive, designer clothes. The price of your clothing does not really matter.

When it comes to making a first impression at work, for example, you don't want to overdo your look. But you also don't want to look sloppy. The clothing you wear reflects your personality. How you dress will impact how people perceive you.

Tip #3: Use The Other Person's Name But Don't Overdo It 

To give a winning first impression, be careful not to overuse someone's name.

This is not suggesting you not repeat someone's first name. Addressing someone by name after introductions is actually a good thing to do; especially if it is uncommon to you. What we are saying is do not over do it.

Tip #4: Be a Great Listener 

The fourth thing you can do that will help you with how to give a winning first impression is to be a great listener.

Being an active listener is a skill. However, it is a wonderful skill when it comes to meeting people and getting them to like you.

Why?

Because most people like to talk about themselves. Their interest is in what they have to say.

As a great listener your task is getting the new person to elaborate on their interests. Their personal opinions will make them feel more comfortable around you.

Active listening tips include giving short comments like, "Oh interesting" or "I agree".

Bonding during the first few minutes of interaction will make people like you more.

Tip #5: Let Other People be the Center of Attraction 

The fifth suggestion on how to give a winning first impression is let other people be the center of attention.

In making a good first impression at work, let the other person understand and feel as if they are more important. Do not dominate the conversation. Do a lot of listening. Do not talk about yourself unless asked. This may seem like a different technique but it works wonders in the world of business as well as meeting people in your after-work life.

Throughout your day-to-day activities knowing how to give a winning first impression is integral when it comes to having relationships, making new friends, job interviews, and getting along with other people.

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Give-a-Winning-First-Impression-Now&id=9842344

This Is the Best Way to Flirt With Someone New

Whether it's a first impression or a first date, body language speaks loudly.

Flirting is often associated with the idea of spoken words, like witty jokes and pick-up lines. And words do make up a part of our social skills and the games we play. But dating, mating, and finding a relationship are also about body language. What you say without words matters when breaking the ice, making a first impression, and getting a date. What's more, the match between your non-verbal communication and a verbal request may mean the difference between connection and dinner alone.

Research About Body Language and Influence

The importance of this match between verbal persuasion and non-verbal communication (sometimes called congruence) is supported by research from Fennis and Stel (2011). The authors were interested in figuring out what types of body language would increase the success of various compliance strategies. Particularly, the authors were interested in which non-verbal styles would be most persuasive to individuals with different "regulatory focus" (Higgins, 1998).

There are two types:

• Promotion focus—goals are seen as hopes and aspirations, and the individual is eager for advancement.
• Prevention focus—goals are seen as obligations and duties, and the individual is cautious and vigilant.

Across two experiments, Fennis and Stel (2011) found that a good fit between a persuader's influence strategy and his or her non-verbal communication increased the chance of success. Essentially, they note, when trying to persuade someone with a cautious "prevention focus," it is better to use a vigilant non-verbal style. In contrast, persuasion with an open "promotion focus" requires an eager non-verbal style.

What This Means for Flirting and Dating

Throughout the course of meeting and attracting a partner, the regulatory focus of that partner is going to change (as are your influence techniques). When you first meet a potential partner, they are likely to be vigilant and cautious of you as a stranger: They will have a prevention focus. So your first persuasion strategies will be centered around making them comfortable and getting them to like you—getting their guard down.

Later in the relationship, after safety and liking are ideally established, the relationship can be moved forward. The potential partner usually feels safer and more adventurous at this point (signaling a shift to a promotion focus). Essentially, they transition from worrying about what could go wrong in their interaction with you to wondering what good things they can get from your connection. At that point, requests for dates, phone numbers, and further courtship becomes much more likely.

So in the beginning of a social interaction with a potential new partner, remember that the individual is most likely cautious (prevention focused). According to the research by Fennis and Stel (2011) above, this requires a vigilant non-verbal style, defined as:

• Using precise and small gestures.
• Using slower movements and speech.
• Taking a backward-leaning posture (away from the other person, rather than leaning forward and crowding them).

Essentially, this means using body language that is a little standoffish at first—quiet, calm, and non-threatening. Remember, you are virtually a stranger. Give your potential partner some personal space, lean back a bit, keep your hands from flailing, and smile warmly. This will support your verbal persuasion efforts to encourage them to feel comfortable and like you.

You will know you've won them over when your partner's body language begins to change: His or her shoulders will relax. They will lean in to you more, make more eye contact, and smile. They will start to open up. At this point, they have switched to apromotion focus—and now it's time for you to switch to an eager nonverbal style, defined as:

• Using more animated, open, and broad gestures.
• Using faster and more energetic movements and speech.
• Taking a forward-leaning body posture (conveying interest and excitement).

Now that you are no longer a potential threat, you can convey your own interest and excitement through body language—and in fact, you should. No one is going to get excited about a date request from a man with slumped shoulders and hang-dog look; similarly, a woman with her chin up and an animated personality is much more compelling. Once you've broken the ice, amp up your eager nonverbal style, and ask for a date. . . 

Conclusion

What you don't say matters. It also changes throughout the course of a dating interaction. Stay calm and lean back in the beginning to persuade your partner that you are safe, trustworthy, and likable. Lean in and get more energetic once you've earned their trust, to motivate them to become excited about the prospect of seeing you again. Add these body language strategies to your social skills, and flirting, dating, and mating will become much easier.

References

• Fennis, B. M. & Stel, M. (2011). The pantomime of persuasion: Fit between non-verbal communication and influence strategies. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 47(4), 806-810.
• Higgins, E. T. (1998). Promotion and prevention: Regulatory focus as a motivational principle. In M. P. Zanna (Ed.), Advances in experimental social psychology, Vol. 30. (pp. 1-46), New York: Academic Press.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201105/is-the-best-way-flirt-someone-new

People Decide These 8 Things About You in Just Seconds

Your first impression might tell people you're untrustworthy, lacking intelligence, or even promiscuous.

You don't get a second chance to make a first impression.

We all hope that when meeting someone new, we don't make a huge goof, like offending that person or saying something stupid.

But even before you have a chance to wow them with your superior intellect or quick wit--before you even open your mouth--people are already making snap judgments about you.

Psychologists call this tendency "thin slicing." Basically, we tend to look for patterns to help us recognize and understand new things. When we meet a new person, it's our natural inclination to make very quick decisions about them with only minimal information. Since we don't have information about that specific person yet, our assessment is based on what we think we know about people we deem to be like them.

For example, it takes people just one-tenth of a second to decide whether they believe a person is trustworthy or not.

See, we have so many decisions to make in a day that if we really thought each one through and assessed all angles and information available to us, we would never get anything done.

So we rely on our past experiences and, yes, our biases to help us make faster decisions.

We tend to believe that wearing thick glasses and speaking in an expressive way are traits of highly intelligent people. When we meet a new person who fits this bill, our first impression is that he or she must be intelligent, too.

Women with visible tattoos are initially perceived as promiscuous and heavy drinkers, even though both of these assessments might be absolutely false.

Even the way you walk into the room gives others the basis for making a decision about you.

And just how important are these snap decisions? Many studies have shown that those initial decisions people make using thin slicing don't change.

This infographic from Business Insider illustrates eight things people decide within seconds of meeting you, based on an analysis of several scientific studies:

http://www.inc.com/larry-kim/people-decide-these-8-things-about-you-in-just-seconds.html

10 Ways to Be the Person People Like to Work With

Raw talent, education or experience, and competency are no longer enough to thrive in today’s competitive economy. Nor is it enough to have the right product or service at the right time to court a client and land the contract.

Soft skills, including adaptability, a positive attitude and good communication skills, are a vital part of fostering a dynamic workforce and being an effective leader.

When most of us are faced with a choice to work with a Jerky Janet or a Friendly Fred, we almost always opt for the likability over ability. The reason? When people like each other they connect, and good things happen when people who feel connected collaborate on projects.

Here are some ways to improve your likability, personally and professionally.

1. Master the BLT factor.

In this case, BLT stands for believability, likability and trustworthiness. Cultivate a reputation that embodies these three key traits. When clients decide with whom to do business, they ask themselves, “Is Mike capable of the work and will I enjoy working with him?”

Obviously both criteria matter, but when we need help getting a job done, we most likely choose a congenial person over a more capable but less cordial one.

2. Show empathy.

The struggles and triumphs of your life affect how you empathize with others. Empathy doesn’t require you to agree with someone else’s opinion. You can politely agree to disagree while you thoughtfully consider his or her feelings. Respect others and try to find common ground. A shared experience can form an instant bond. 

3. Be reliable.

Entrepreneurs who are consistent and dependable will win contracts and develop long-term professional relationships. Your clients need to know they can count on you to deliver the work reliably. Do your job well and people will begin to see you as consistent and trustworthy. 

4. Tell the truth.

It sounds easy until you’re late on a project and over-budget. When you’re faced with a choice, always choose honesty over deception. Integrity has become a rare trait in the business world. All relationships require honesty, but professionalism is rooted in your personal integrity. Always use your best judgment and be transparent with those with whom you interact.

5. Ask questions.

Show sincere curiosity in the lives of others. Ask open-ended questions that begin with “Tell me…” Then really listen to the answer. You’ll discover more about your clients, colleagues and friends through effective listening. Your genuine interest will earn you the respect and appreciation of those around you.

6. Have an open mind.

When you judge others harshly or gossip on a regular basis, you invite negativity into your life. Consider the opinions of others before you reject them based on your pre-conceived notions. Everyone is afraid of rejection. When you show others that you’re open, accepting and kind, you’ll attract more friends and opportunities.

7. Show engagement.

Your body language speaks louder than your words. Some gestures, such as crossing your arms or putting your hands in your pockets, can make you appear withdrawn from a situation. When you talk to someone, open up. Make consistent eye contact, smile and nod occasionally.

8. Master the first impression.

Everyone forms immediate judgments about the people they meet. To make a great first impression, exhibit your professionalism and character. What you wear matters. Dress to impress by wearing clothes that fit well and are in good condition. When you greet someone, introduce yourself and give a firm handshake.

9. Share the limelight.

It’s wonderful to be recognized for your achievements and hard work. However, don’t forget to thank those who helped you along the way. Publicly recognize employees and partners who have worked tirelessly next to you. Don’t monopolize the spotlight or try to give the impression that you’re more important. Instead, be friendly and considerate of others and give credit where credit is due.

10. Remember names.

There’s no better way to build a relationship with someone than to remember his name. This simple, yet powerful gesture, makes others feel valued and respected and can help you build a large professional network. Deliberately practice remembering names when you meet new connections. It takes a bit of time and effort, but remembering someone’s name can make a difference in how that person feels about you and your brand.

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/245453

The Secret of the Perfect Handshake

         

The ritual of the handshake is powerful and rich with symbolic significance. It’s something you do without even thinking about it, and it profoundly affects your relationships: you walk up to another person and shake hands. If you know the rules, you give a firm three-to-five pump handshake in greeting while standing approximately sixteen inches from the person. In business you greet someone in this manner and then step back to a minimum of two-and-a-half feet distance, with no other touch in the critical first four minutes of the interaction. A handshake allows you to form a first impression of that person or, if you have met them before, to form an impression of them for that interaction.

In Western cultures, handshaking is used to greet another person and “seal” a contract or promise. The handshake is also the quickest, most effective way to establish rapport with another person. Research in the United States shows it takes an average of three hours of continuous interaction to develop the same level of rapport that you get with a handshake.

Why do you think we shake hands? We shake hands to show that we hold no weapon. It is thought to have started with the Roman arm clasp. One man would reach out his right hand, his weapon hand, and clasp just below the elbow of the man he was greeting. With this greeting neither person could wield a weapon easily. Medieval knights created the shaking part of the handshake because they knew that other knights hid daggers up in their sleeves and that the shaking would dislodge any hidden weapons. So basically handshakes are weapons checks: Are you packing any weapons? Let me check. Nope. Okay, let’s talk.

This interpretation would also explain why, until quite recently, it was chiefly males who practiced handshaking. For men a strong grip signifies male bonding through a silent display of competitive power. But up until recently most men, especially in the South, were taught to wait for the woman to extend her hand because to extend his hand would be making the assumption she was carrying a weapon and that would be a great insult. It used to be that offering one’s hand to a woman would carry the outrageous implication that the “gentler sex" could also be dangerous.

Things are different now. With the exception of women in Kentucky and Tennessee, women across the country prefer men to extend their hand and give them a handshake. The majority say that when a man does not offer his hand, it makes her feel she is not respected or seen as an equal.

Although the handshake is rapidly becoming an internationally accepted business greeting, Americans shake hands more often than people of other cultures. The handshake can serve as an important verb in your body language vocabulary. Few things can create such an effective first impression as an easily given, gracious handshake. But unless your father took you aside and gave you tips as a teenager, most likely no one told you the ideal way to shake hands. Based on my research, here is the best way to execute the 'perfect handshake' by American standards.

The Perfect Handshake

 

• Rise, if seated. That rule used to apply to men only; now women should rise as well. If you remain seated when someone is introduced to you, the communication of personal indifference is unmistakable, not to mention offensive. The only approved exception to rising to shake hands is if you are eating. If that is the case, you can wait to shake hands until after you are done.
• Walk up to the person with confidence. Keep your head level and your hands at your side. Be sure to keep your hands out of your pockets. Research indicates that we don't trust people with hands in their pockets. Make sure your right hand is free to shake hands. Always shift any purses, briefcases, papers, beverages or cell phones to your left hand before you begin the greeting.
• Smile briefly. Don't overdo it. If you smile too long or too much, you are perceived as submissive. An overextended smile can create negative impressions, such as “overeager,” “easily manipulated” or “not intelligent.” Women need to take special care not to overextend the smile as it can reduce personal power and can even be misinterpreted as a sexual come on.
• Make eye contact. There is a substantial amount of research showing that good eye contact increases feelings of trust. Don't stare, but don't look at your shoes. Making eye contact as you approach lets the person know you want to interact. Men need to extend the eye contact for at least three seconds without blinking or looking away as they shake hands. Women need to be careful of holding eye contact for more than three to five seconds at a time with men they have not met before. Men may perceive extended eye contact as a sexual advance.
• Face the person heart-to-heart. When you stand at an angle and don’t face the person squarely, you are sending the symbolic message that you are not being straight and open. You may look as if you need to protect yourself, you do not like the other person, or you feel the need to reduce the intimacy or the duration of the interaction.
• If you have a problem with clammy hands, don’t forget to wipe them on your handkerchief or tissue before you shake hands. And at social functions, carry any iced drinks in your left hand, so your right hand will not be cold and damp when a handshake is called for.
• Reach out your right hand and arm across your body to your right. The forcefulness and confidence of the move lets the other person know you not only want to shake hands, you look forward to it.
• Make sure the arm goes fully outward as an arm held closely to the body indicates timidity and lack of confidence.
• Make sure your hand is straight up with the thumb on top. The thumb on top is symbolic; it indicates you want equality in your interaction. No one person will dominate. You will respect the other person and expect him or her to respect you.
• Stretch out and open your hand between the thumb and the first finger so that you slide your hand easily into the web of the other person's hand. Make sure the rest of your fingers are together with your palm flat rather than cupped so your palmcan touch their palm...
• Make palm-to-palm contact. Open palms symbolically show a desire to be open and honest in your interactions; not giving a person contact with your palm in a handshake is read subliminally as a lack of openness and honesty. It’s why we hate a wimpy or limp handshake. It makes the other person nervous and he or she may wonder what you are hiding.
• Once full contact is made, wrap your fingers around the other person’s, put your thumb down gently, lock thumbs and squeeze the hand firmly. The pressure should be equal or at the most slightly more than the pressure you are given. Never grip the other’s hand in a contest of macho handshaking to see who can hold the hardest or longest. You want to have a firm handshake but the rule is to match the pressure or add no more than two degrees of pressure.

Not surprisingly recent academic research indicates that a firm handshake that shows strength and vigor with appropriate eye contact length and completeness of grip is related to a favorable first impression.

The handshake is a potent element in communicating your personality and intent. It speaks volumes about who you really are and what you actually think. So smile and reach out your hand for the perfect handshake.

http://www.pattiwood.net/article.asp?PageID=2490

How to Conquer Your Sales Fears

The expression, "He could sell ice to an Eskimo," acknowledges that certain people are born salespeople.

For most small-business owners, however, the selling process is anything but easy. In fact, when it comes to pitching their product or service, many entrepreneurs struggle with any number of issues, including lack of confidence in themselves or their product, fear of failure and fear of closing the deal. The good news: Experts say these fears can be overcome with the proper attitude, training and practice.

Here are five of the most common fears about selling and how they can be conquered.

Fear No. 1: You will make a negative first impression. We all know how important a first impression is, and the fear that you will not make a good one can be intense. It may even make you avoid meeting ideal prospects.

How to overcome it: Show credibility through your appearance and non-verbal behavior, says Larina Kase, author of Clients, Clients and More Clients: Create an Endless Stream of New Business with the Power of Psychology (McGraw-Hill, 2011). Research shows that people are attracted to others who dress like them, she says, adding, "If your audience is school-aged girls, you may wear hot pink or purple, or if your audience is conservative business suit types, you may wear a suit with a bright shirt or tie, something that also shows your personal style." Focus on non-verbal behaviors like smiling (though not a "perma-smile"), eye contact and open posture, and be sure not to fidget and play with keys or other objects.

Fear No. 2: You will be rejected. Experienced salespeople know they aren't going to be successful 100 percent of the time, but newcomers may regard failure as the end of the world. Joe Stewart, owner and general manager of Danco Transmission in Fairfield, Ohio, remembers attempting his first sale at age 21. "I almost turned white with fear from what might happen if they said that awful two-letter word we all despise as salespeople, 'No,'" he recalls.

How to overcome it: Professionals not only know rejection happens, they look forward to it, says Peter Shallard, a Sydney, Australia-based business psychology expert and blogger. Understanding the reasons behind a rejection can help you refine your product and presentation. Stewart, now 43, reflects on that first experience, saying, "For me, the only way to beat that fear was to confront it. The more I did it the better I became at it, and less fear was the result."

Fear No. 3: You'll come across as pushy. We've all had at least one negative experience with a salesperson who kept pushing and pressuring and wouldn't let us leave or hang up the phone. Many business owners worry they'll make prospects feel that way.

How to overcome it: Kase suggests focusing more on having a conversation with someone than simply selling. Learn the prospect's needs and ask yourself if what you're offering is of real value to that person. When you care about your prospective customer and develop a sense of trust, you're more likely to make the sale. "My first customer let me know that at first they felt uncomfortable due to the horror stories they had heard about other auto repair places," Danco's Stewart says. "But that quickly subsided after speaking with me because I made them feel as though they were family."

Fear No. 4: You won't deliver. Even when you do get a yes, you may fear you won't be able to fulfill all of the person's expectations. You may even suffer from the "Impostor Syndrome," which means you're starting to question the value of your own products.

How to overcome it: Kase suggests gathering feedback from customers and taking note of all the ways you have delivered. That approach helped Christine Buffaloe, who started Serenity Virtual Assistant Services, an online business management service, in 2005, and feared people would think she wasn't worth what she was charging. Buffaloe says she gained confidence from reading the testimonials on her own website. "Continuously look for ways to improve your services so you are sure you're providing optimal value," she adds, "and you will always be confident in your abilities."

Fear No. 5: You don't know if you're doing it right. Going into sales without any training can be terrifying. How do you know you're using the right tactics and offering people what they need?

How to overcome it: Debra Condren, president and CEO of Manhattan Business Coaching and author of Ambition is Not A Dirty Word(Broadway, 2008), recommends learning sales techniques by attending a training program. When Tanner Shepard co-founded Austin, Texas-based Ranch Road Creative Solutions, a marketing services provider, in 2005, he was thrust into a sales role and gained confidence only after an intensive weekly sales course. "I had to challenge myself out of my comfort zone," he says. 

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/220691 

6 Ways to Make a Great First Impression

You never get a second chance to make a first impression. Either consciously or unconsciously, we make judgements about the professionalism, character and competence of others based on first impressions.

Just as you evaluate potential business partners, employees and personal acquaintances on your first-time encounter with them, others will judge you and your business by how you conduct yourself.

The best way to make a positive first impression, especially in business, is to embrace uncommon common sense. Many entrepreneurs overlook the importance of poise and professionalism. A few common courtesies will help you make a positive impression when you meet someone for the first time.

Use these six tips to guarantee you’ll make a great first, and lasting, impression — no matter the circumstance.

1. Prepare ahead of time. Preparation reduces anxiety and will help you show more authority. If you do your homework, you’ll have an enormous advantage over your competition. Before an important meeting, learn everything you can about your potential client and his or her unique approach to business. Familiarize yourself with the industry in which you’ll be working and brush up on current events. Visit the company website to learn more about the company’s history, staff and recent news releases. When you take the time to prepare, you’ll appear interesting and knowledgeable — two qualities that help make a good impression.

2. Find out who will attend the meeting. To go above and beyond, reach out to the meeting organizer to learn which stakeholders will be in attendance. Memorize each person’s name so you’ll be able to address everyone directly throughout the meeting. Log onto LinkedIn and learn more about each person and their background, as well as hobbies and interests. If you find you have something in common, use it as a way to break the ice with a little small talk before you move on to business.

3. Arrive a few minutes early. It’s important to be punctual, but when you arrive on time you send the clear message that you’re responsible, capable and respectful of others’ time. Those few extra minutes will give you the opportunity to go to the restroom, check your appearance and gain your composure before you walk into an important meeting. Always schedule extra time on your calendar to account for travel, traffic delays, inclement weather and finding a parking spot.

4. Suit up for success.

A professional appearance will enhance your personal brand. The more “put together” you appear, the more likely you will leave a positive impression. You don’t have to purchase expensive designer suits to look your best. Instead, invest in timeless classic pieces to create the foundation of your wardrobe. Always dress for your client’s comfort, not yours. If you’re meeting with a group of bankers, a dark suit is most appropriate. Some occasions, however, call for a more creative approach. It’s okay to show more of your personal style if you work in an artistic career or when you meet with a group of designers. Be sure your wardrobe consists of clothes that fit and flatter your body shape.

5. Give a firm handshake.

 In most cultures, a solid handshake carries a lot of weight. Your handshake should be warm, friendly and sincere. If it is too firm or too weak, you may convey a negative impression. If you’re seated when you’re introduced to someone, stand before you shake his or her hand — it shows respect for yourself and the person you’re meeting. Remember to keep it short and sweet; many people will become uneasy if a handshake lasts for more than a few seconds. Finally, be sure to smile and make eye contact as you shake hands. 

6. Listen effectively.

 

Attentive listening builds trust. Throughout your meeting, ask pertinent questions. When someone else speaks, make eye contact and show you’re fully engaged in what he is saying. Always allow others time to fully express themselves. If you interrupt or attempt to finish someone’s sentence, he may assume you’re in a hurry or feel you don’t respect his opinion. Effective listening skills will help you establish rapport with new clients and business partners.

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/237361 

5 Keys to Making a Great First Impression

We used to think that it took seven seconds to make a first impression. 

According to new research out of Princeton, it's about 100 milliseconds — the same amount of time it takes for a giant hummingbird to flap its wings. 

We're all constantly practicing what psychologists call physiognomy, or reading a person's personality traits from their appearance. 

"Appearance is our first filter," says Sylvia Ann Hewlett, author of new book "Executive Presence," "and it's happening all the time."

Job interviews, speaking gigs, client meetings, first dates — the list goes on.

"The really good news here is that it's about polish, grooming, and being put together," Hewlett says. "It's not about the precise shape of your body, texture of your hair, or the designer you wear."

As part of researching her book, Hewlett and her team at the Center for Talent Innovation did a survey of 4,000 professionals in the U.S., including 268 senior executives, hoping to decode what businesspeople think "capable" looks and sounds like. 

The senior execs say that the following five qualities of appearance make people instantly look like leaders: 

1. Looking polished and groomed. 

"Carelessness seems to signal that you don't respect your coworkers or yourself," Hewlett says, "and you certainly don't respect the client if you show up with soup on your tie or bitten nails, anything to make you look unkempt." 

To avoid that, clean up. If you're working in Silicon Valley, make sure you've got the appropriate skinny jeans; if you're on Wall Street, snag the perfectly cut jacket. And remember to brush your hair. 

2. Being physically attractive and fit. 

Attractive people tend to earn more and get hired more often than their less attractive peers. That bias gets carried over to senior professionals. 

"Being physically fit gives people the confidence that you will take care of what you are asked to do, because you are taking care of yourself," GE executive Deb Elam tells Hewlett.

3. Dressing in simple, stylish clothes.

"Dress for your next job," Hewlett says.

To know how to do that, observe the people in your organization who dress well, then pattern yourself after them.

"It's not that everyone has to wear a gray suit," she says, "but this sense of polish and putting some thought into it does yield some benefits." 

4. Stand tall. 

The importance of height is seriously gendered. According to Hewlett's research, 6% of respondents said that being tall contributed to a woman's executive presence, while 16% said it mattered for a man's.

You can see it in the race for the Oval Office: The taller candidate has beaten the shorter candidates two-thirds of the time.

5. Looking youthful. 

Looking youthful, but not like a child, signals that you have the "vitality to lead the charge and not succumb to setback," Hewlett writes. She sees the need evidenced in the cosmetic surgery market, as the number of Botox injections, facelifts, and "upper arm lift" operations continue to increase year over year. 

But no matter how you're presenting yourself, you need to be aware of the audience you're about to impress. 

"If you're headquartered in New York and making a presentation in Mountain View, do some adjusting to how you show up," she says, such as opting for a more California casual look. 

"You want to show that you can be fluent," she says.

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/234581

10 Ways You Can Blow a First Impression

Ever hear the saying, “you only have one chance at a first impression"? Of course you have, because you didn’t just fall off the turnip truck yesterday.

The difficulty with first impressions is that when you meet someone new, you don’t often know if that person could be highly valuable to you or your business. Yep, that random person at that restaurant or the baseball game that was just introduced to you by a friend could work for or own the company that you’re currently trying to sell your new product line to.

But you won’t know that until you walk into their office and realize that you've recently met. Let's just hope that you didn't make one of these 10 first impression killers.

1. You were wearing sunglasses. 
It doesn’t matter that it was the middle of the day and you were looking head on into the sun, your eyes are the gateway to who you are. They illustrate your confidence, sincerity and interest in the person you’re meeting, so do yourself a favor and take them off when you’re meeting someone new -- yes, even if they left theirs on.

2. Ever hear of "dress to impress"?
I live in Los Angeles, so I’m well aware of how hip it is to look like you just crawled out of bed, but seriously, did you? Here’s another adage that you should pay attention to, “perception is reality.” If you appear like you do not care about yourself enough to be even moderately presentable, you probably don’t.

3. The limp grip.
Yes, this one is in every “how to” article or book ever written, but it’s one of the most important, so it must be reiterated. You can tell a lot by a person based on their handshake -- soft equals weak, firm equals strong. It’s really that simple.

4. It looked like you couldn't care less.
You didn’t know what they did for a living, so clearly they weren’t important, right? Wrong. You don’t know who they are or what they’ve done and if you don’t care about meeting them, they won’t care about meeting you.

5. Couldn’t seem to focus.
Have you ever had a conversation with someone that seemed like they were looking beyond you, or better yet, kept glancing away at the baseball game on TV? Clearly they weren’t interested enough in you to focus and you noticed it. You must focus in on whom you’re talking to and treat them like they’re the most important person in your life at that moment.

6. You brought your own baggage. 
In general, people like dealing with other happy people, but you got up on the wrong side of the bed and it showed. It really doesn’t matter that you’re in a bad mood, because you only get one chance, so put on a smile, at least until the interaction is over, then you can go back to being poopy.

7. You just couldn’t stop talking about yourself.
There’s not much worse than being around someone that won’t stop talking about themselves or turning every story into one about them. It’s well known that people love the sound of their own voice, but you need to be smarter and use the opportunity to let the person you’re meeting do all of the talking. Trust me, they’ll like you for it.

8. Name dropping? Really?
Nobody cares that you spent the summer sailing the Caribbean with XYZ celebrity or CEO, because it makes you look like you’re overcompensating, which you probably are. Slow it down and practice some humility, which will get you a lot further in both the short and long terms.

9. You wouldn’t put your phone away.
This is a problem that has certainly come more to the forefront since the inception of the smartphone but really needs some attention. If you can’t put your phone away while you are talking with someone new -- or really anyone -- it’s clear that you have absolutely no interest in them. Pretty simple.

10. You couldn’t remember their name.
I know this one is a bit more difficult but is absolutely worth improvement through practice. Do you know why? Because there is only one thing people like more than talking about themselves, and that’s hearing their own name. This is one of the most valuable "first impression" tools out there -- you must try to say their name as often as reasonably possible throughout and at the end of the conversation, which they will absolutely remember you for.

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/236056

6 Easy Ways to Sabotage Your Career

Little things matter. Big dreams can be undermined by small decisions and actions day by day, conversation by conversation. These seemingly small things—often given little thought—communicate more about who you are than you may realize or intend.

First impressions are so powerful that they can override all other information we are told about people. A recent study shared at the Society for Personality and Social Psychology (SPSP) annual conference shows that appearance and first impressions shape everything, from whether we ultimately end up liking someone to whether we view him or her as trustworthy.

“As soon as one sees another person, an impression is formed,” says Nicholas Rule of the University of Toronto. “This happens so quickly—just a small fraction of a second—that what we see can sometimes dominate what we know.”

Here are some ways you can unknowingly sabotage the impression you leave with others and the quality of your relationships:

1. By including your phone in the conversation. After a very positive recommendation, I recently met with a company interested in working with me and my team. The senior person brought a team member with him so that she could share her critical role in delivering their services. She checked her phone throughout the conversation and texted frequently as the three of us talked.

Her actions communicated that she was disinterested, distracted and something else was more important. This not only affected my first impression of her, but also of their firm. Anytime your phone, or any device, has your attention rather than the person you are talking with, you are placing yourself at a disadvantage.

2. By assuming too much familiarity. When we interact with a new boss, potential client or new teammate like a longtime good friend, we can convey disrespect and send unintended signals. I have seen familiarity result in arriving late, sending emails with typos and errors, oversharing, constantly texting during important conversations or telling an inappropriate joke.

Misreading these boundaries might cause others to question your judgment, which takes a long time to overcome.

3. By asking the obvious. One of the quickest ways to show you didn’t do your homework or prepare is by asking questions that have really accessible answers. Today we can research, read or view almost any fact in advance. When you interview for a new job or meet a new potential client, do your homework in advance.

A friend recently shared that a senior candidate asked about the locations where the company had operations and if an acquisition had been completed, when both answers were available with one click. Preparation shows that you care and respect everyone’s time. Plus, you’ll contribute more with preparation and planning.

4. By relying on your mirror. There are many easy ways to give the impression that you are holding your mirror and it’s all about you. Examples include: always asking and never giving, talking too much, having all the answers and not listening.

If you are asking for a favor, ask how you can help the other person. Listen to advice. Remember that it’s a conversation and two-way relationship, not a monologue.

5. By watering the grapevine. If you decide to talk about someone at work behind his or her back, know what you are getting into. You’ll erode the trust others have in you and potentially get yourself involved in office drama.

Use a close friend outside the office or your significant other as your sounding board. Never say anything at work that you wouldn’t mind being shared with anyone else. You’ll save yourself much potential embarrassment—or worse. See No. 2.

6. By skipping the thank-you.

 Most of us have been blessed with countless people who helped us for no good reason other than kindness and paying it forward. They wanted to help and offer a hand—and they did. For all of their effort, we just need to do one thing. Say, “Thank you.”

Thank you for making that introduction to the new client. Thank you for taking the time from your busy schedule to offer me advice. Thank you. Never assume that someone is too important and has outgrown a heartfelt thank-you. Saying thank you says something very important about you.

Don’t sweat the small stuff, but remember it. These daily decisions and actions shape the impressions others have of you as much as your work. Use the small interactions to boost your reputation and build long-term relationships by starting off on the right foot.

http://www.success.com/blog/6-easy-ways-to-sabotage-your-career