Focus On Reality And All Else Will Be Added

The ultimate fantasy is the bad intention and getting away with having it inside of you without catching yourself with it. Ultimately, genuine cheating and bad intentions are self-destructive. What is constructive, however done, is living in reality with simple honesty and realistic thinking and action. Indeed, the ultimate weakness is thinking you can win dishonestly, then deceive yourself with everyone else that you did not cheat.

When I think about life, reality and existence, I genuinely feel and understand that the best way is to approach it honestly without shortcut attempts, or any "aces up the sleeve"so to speak. The ultimate fantasy is "free without effort" anyway. We are not "owed" a good life, we have to create and make that ourselves.

For example, a person can have all of the advantages of life and mess them up, because they want to cheat or "have it even easier" or "better". On the other hand, a person can have no advantages yet do great ultimately because of a patient, realistic approach to living and reality that is realistic, understanding and "house holding", so to speak.

A great life and reality are promised to nobody, it has to be created and worked out from within a person. All the outer advantages and "great" trappings in existence mean nothing if you do not have the advantages of realistic understanding and honest ethic innately.

Solving the mystery of why some genuinely have it all, and some do not even with "all the advantages", it is probably because of the factors mentioned here. It starts inside, not outside. Why do you think the quote is "as within, so without" and not 'as without, so within'? It always starts within, and not without. It all starts with the cause and ends with the effect as a genuinely working cycle. Nature and reality do not work any other way. So, if you have a bad effect consider the cause and then change it from within strongly.

So, this article is not "the ends justify the means". This article is more like start from a good cause point and then create a great effect. If you start with the wrong cause, whatever the outer advantages, you will have bad effects. If you start with a right cause, ultimately good or great effects can be created whatever the temporary problems within the actions, because you are coming from the right place.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Focus-On-Reality-And-All-Else-Will-Be-Added&id=10405898

Wait for It - On the Virtue of Patience

Building confidence takes patience. -- In that it takes years.

Some people attract confidence naturally. But, unfairly as the world works, not everyone does.

If life's truly got you down, turning it around is one of the bigger projects you'll ever undergo. And even with a fairly normal life, rising above the average and becoming extraordinarily successful will also take years.

Trust me.

This is one of the major reasons that people get stuck in unsatisfying lives: We often end up settling for certain conditions because we think they're inevitable. This can be because we've endured them for a certain period, and/or because we find ourselves coming back to them.

It's all due to a lack of one little term, which means a world of difference between those who succeed and those who don't... :

PATIENCE.

When someone settles for less, there's necessarily a bi-sensation of giving up. And even though this might feel nice, it only does so because it's comfortable. And, more often than not, comfort is what keeps us from getting where we want to be.

How many times have you planned to get up early only to snooze within the first millisecond of the alarm clock?

How many times have you wanted to lose weight only to keep gorging on junk food several times a week?

I could go on, but you get the point.

We settle for things by allowing them to happen. And by not being sufficiently patient we give way for allowing something to happen which we might end up settling for, even though initially we wouldn't necessarily want to.

This is especially true for people of low confidence. When we're not confident, we think unrealistically less of our abilities, therefore often not putting in the necessary work to succeed in whatever our pursuit, thereby getting used to failing.

And, in turn, we end up thinking of not only ourselves, but of everything we do, as a failure. - Which, in a classic example of downward spiralling, affects our patience negatively.

However, if one has enough patience to succeed, guess how that affects our confidence - and our patience? Yes, exactly.

Patience is crucial. Not only to succeed in any endeavours, but to a basic, good life. Think about it: If you want to achieve ANYHING worthwhile, how are you gonna do it if you deem failure in the midst of the process only because you get impatient??

I don't want this for you. I don't want any of you to settle for less than you truly want. Allow yourself to slowly build the patience of a saint, and you will be able to reap whatever tremendous benefits you want.

ACTION ITEM:

For 24 hours, turn off your phone, don't go online, and don't watch any TV or listen to any radio.

Why? Because we've gotten so used to these everyday distractions that our attention span, and, hence, our patience, suffers drastically. The longer you're able to abstain from these kinds of instant gratification-kinda stimuli, the better your patience will be.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Wait-for-It---On-the-Virtue-of-Patience&id=9725358

5 Emotional Lessons from the Movie 'Inside Out'

The first time I saw the Pixar film Inside Out, I had to hold back an all-out convulsive sob. My 7-year-old son, whose caring, sensitive soul constantly amazes me, looked up at me to see tears streaming down my face, and the pace of his own tears quickened. We saw the film a second time with my mother and 91-year-old grandmother, and four generations of tears flowed. The smartest and saddest movie Pixar has ever made, Inside Out comes to Blu-Ray Nov. 3 so you can cry with as many members of your family as you want in the comfort of your own home.

The film takes place inside the mind of 11-year-old Riley, who learns to wrangle five personifications of her emotions—Joy, Sadness, Fear, Disgust, and Anger, while making the life-changing move from Minnesota to San Francisco.

There could have been as many as 21 different emotions featured in the film, such as boredom, contempt and embarrassment that make up our emotional DNA. That's the suggestion psychologists Paul Ekman and Dacher Keltner made when they first consulted on the film five years ago, when writers began the intricate task of developing human emotions as a cast of characters.

Inside Out director Pete Docter was close to adding a sixth character—pride, an early press kit for Inside Out reveals. “Or Schadenfreude, who delighted in the pain of others. But it started getting crowded in there. We ultimately landed on five,” Docter says.

“The Emotions are kind of like the voices in our heads,” says Docter, who won an Academy Award for the 2009 film Up, another tear-jerker disguised as a kid flick. “When we were just getting started on this film, we looked around at our kids, friends, co-workers and we realized that everybody has a default temperament.”

So, would you be able to name your default emotion, or the temperament you feel most often? Most of us can't, the psychologists Ekman and Keltner say. That's what I find amazing about Inside Out—its ability to give us a tangible handle to describe our emotions—something that stays with viewers long after the film is over.

When the story was pitched to Mindy Kaling, the voice for Disgust, she broke down in tears, explaining "I just think it's really beautiful that you guys are making a story that tells kids that it's difficult to grow up and it's OK to be sad about it."

Here are four lessons we can learn from Inside Out:

1. “All right everyone, fresh start! We're gonna have a good day, which will turn into a good week, which will turn into a good year, which will turn into a good life!” — Joy

Joy, voiced by Amy Poehler, is the bright-colored, glowing character inside Riley’s mind who measures her success by the number of happy days she can produce.

In this line from the movie, Joy thinks that a good life is one that never experiences hardship, but her short-sightedness keeps her from realizing the benefit of other emotions, such as fear, disgust or anger. Thankfully, we know that a good life is not a perfect life absent of emotion.

2. “Crying helps me slow down and obsess over the weight of life's problems.” — Sadness

None of the other characters understand the purpose of Sadness, voiced by The Office’s Phyllis Smith, and with good reason—it seems Sadness simply slows down Joy’s desire for quick decisions and quick fixes. She is a sluggish, slumped-shouldered drag in a blue hue, who Joy has to literally drag around Riley's mind.

The film's psychologists say in their New York Times op-ed they took issue with sadness's portrayal because inside our minds, sadness is not a sluggish nuisance, but rather a physiological response that signals the body to respond (we cry). Though Sadness delivers this line as comic relief, she accurately describes what happens when we experience profound loss. We slow down, we process and we cry. 

3. “I know you don't want me to, but... I miss home. I miss Minnesota. You need me to be happy, but I want my old friends and my hockey team... I wanna go home. Please don't be mad…” — Riley

Riley wants to be happy, just as her parents and any other 11-year-old girl thinks she should be, but she becomes overwhelmed with the different feelings she's begun experiencing, including anger and disgust that masquerades as joy—the result, sarcasm. Unable to cope with her internal conflict, Riley loses interest in friends, activities and core personality traits that once made her happy and made her the person she is. This, of course, psychologists will say is a classic description of depression. 

But the one emotion that breaks through and reunites the pre-teen with her parents is sadness. Riley breaks down in tears in this scene, finally releasing all the emotion she's bundled inside. This important line in the movie reveals sadness is a more powerful emotion than happiness. With regard to Inside Out's character development, Joy may be the most appealing and easiest character to like, but Sadness rises as the most important emotion of them all.

4. "You need me to be happy..."

Early in the movie, Riley’s mother praises her “brave and happy girl” for keeping a smile on her face through the family’s difficult transition. Unknowingly, Riley's mother has suggested that happiness, or at least putting on a brave face to feign happiness, is the best way to cope. 

As the months go on and Riley struggles with the adjustment, she finds it harder to be happy like her parents want. But she didn't need to force herself to be happy. She needed to be allowed to be sad. During this scene when Riley breaks down crying, she shares a formative moment with her parents, who finally realize they can't take away the hurt for their daughter, but can show her it's ok and normal to be sad. 

Of all the poignant messages that Inside Out delivers, this is the most important. "The real star of the film is sadness, for Inside Out is a film about loss and what people gain when guided by feelings of sadness," the psychologists Eckman and Keltner write. 

Sadness, tears and the emotion of awe I felt about this movie led me to share the experience with my mom, an intelligent, sensitive soul, but someone I have a hard time showing emotion to. But for the second time seeing Inside Out in a theater, I cried in front of her—a lot and for the first time in years. 

 http://www.success.com/blog/5-emotional-lessons-from-the-movie-inside-out