Message From the Universe: Time to Built That Bridge

"Of course, you chose your life. Your time and place of birth. Your parents. Your leanings and inclinations. Hair color. Height. Your savoir-faire (French for "Know-how"). So that now, on a stage of your own design, you'd have all you need to become all you want.

Wow!

The Universe"

So if everything in your life is a choice, might as well choose happiness. If you create a path that is inclined to being successful, you then work your butt off to making this path a reality. Question is: "How much you want it?" How hard are you willing to work to make all this happen the way you imagined it? The concept of self-fulfilling prophecy is working in your benefit. Repeat the positive over and over again and thus shall you receive it. By exploring your inner self, you are opening doors to your subconscious that is able to control more than what you conscious mind can comprehend or fathom. There is NO limits to what your mind can do. You can become all you want at any time in your life as long as you are self-aware of who you are. When you look at a bridge that allows you to cross from one town to another, it can be difficult to imagine the logistic behind its construction. The amount of material, professional knowledge, hours of work, amount of people involved to make all this happen. Let's not forget the cost here as it being phenomenal. It all started with blue prints, requirements, the need of a bridge that can connect two sides of a river or bay that can allow citizen to cross and encourage economy on both sides. If the needs arise, people will built it. So, if that can happen, why can't you do the same for your own life?

Your brain has two hemisphere, the left and right brain. Most right handed human beings will use their left hemisphere to create communicative patterns that allows them to function in society. Right side hemisphere is mostly focused on geometrical forms with double or triple axes, which are more towards being mathematical geniuses. Let's move towards the metaphysical side of consciousness and subconsciousness. There is also a bridge that can be built between these two sides of your internal capacity of controlling not just what is around you, but controlling the outside world as well. If you are able to create a bridge between both consciousness and subconsciousness, you can resolve how the Universe works. Your brain capacity will be above and beyond what any human can imagine or even understand. There will be NO limits. Most humans can use at most 10% of their brain capacity, but by building that bridge within your own mind, you can use up to 40 or even 50%, depending on how much energy and time you put into it. Do not despair, there is no deadline here. It's a life long change that needs to start TODAY. So what are you waiting for? Oh yes, you might need some tools for that right? The best way to built that bridge is MEDITATION. There is no lumber or aluminum beams or studs needed to built that bridge. Good old meditation is a good start to creating that path in your mind so you can start living your life at your full potential.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-Time-to-Built-That-Bridge&id=9575605

What Is Emotional Intelligence and How Does It Impact the Workplace?

It is almost certain that you have heard of emotional quotient, EQ, and emotional intelligence before, but have you ever asked yourself if you are emotionally intelligent? To go one step further, are you emotionally intelligent at work? What about as a leader? If you have pondered these questions, you may have also asked yourself why emotional intelligence is so important. In this article, I will share more about emotional intelligence and its importance to every person, every workplace, every society, and even to the entire world.

What is emotional intelligence?

According to psychologists Peter Salovey and John Mayer, emotional intelligence is "the ability to perceive emotions, to access and generate emotions, to understand emotions and emotional knowledge, and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote emotional and intellectual growth." In layman's terms, it is the extent to which we are self-aware (able to recognize and understand our emotions), can self-manage (able to adapt and control our emotions and reactions), can motivate ourselves (taking the right actions to achieve a goal), can express empathy for other people, and possess strong social skills (ability to build positive relationships with others).

Emotional intelligence is measured through standardized tests and the result of these tests is called the Emotional Quotient (EQ). The higher your EQ is, the better. However, unlike the Intelligence Quotient (IQ), which is often fixed by the time you reach a certain age, most scholars and psychologists believe that EQ is malleable and can be enhanced and learned.

Why is emotional intelligence important?

EQ may not be as well-known as IQ, yet many experts deem it as more important than IQ. Why? Studies show EQ is a better predictor of success, quality of relationships, and happiness of a person. It is evident everywhere and is critical in all aspects of life. Have you ever heard someone make statements like these: "Wow, what a positive person! He will surely achieve something great in life!" or "She is very caring and sociable. She is such a great boss." These comments illustrate that when a person has high EQ (even when the person does not know it), it is seen and felt by others. It is these types of individuals that others tend to believe will most likely attain success. So, why is EQ important to everyone?

1. EQ is absolutely an important part of forming, developing, maintaining, and enhancing personal relationships with others. It is undeniable that people who know how to build positive relationships with other people will most likely be successful in their fields. Workers with high EQ can work harmoniously in teams and adjust to changes. No matter how intelligent you are, if you have low emotional intelligence, you may find the path to success a struggle. However, there is good news. Take comfort in knowing that you can improve your EQ skills at any age and regardless of past behavior.

2. Being aware of oneself means being able to handle constructive criticisms. You would probably agree that there is no perfect person in the world and in everything we do, we need other people's criticisms and communication to do better. If you have a high EQ, you are self-aware, meaning you understand your strengths, admit your weaknesses, and understand how your actions will affect other people surrounding you. Your high EQ allows you to take these criticisms as an opportunity to improve your performance. This is a crucial part of working in an environment with many stakeholders.

3. Self-motivated people can inspire everyone. When a person is self-motivated, others around them often evaluate their own level of motivation. A self-motivated person is optimistic and is driven by what really matters to him/her. Who would not want a self-motivated person around, right? Motivation is contagious and a highly-motivated household, workplace, or society will repeatedly outperform non-motivated ones. Low-motivation may be a sign that your emotional quotient is low in one or more of the key EQ quadrants.

4. EQ makes the world genuine. People with a high Emotional Quotient have compassion that allows them to connect with others on an "emotional level." If a person is able to empathize with others, then he/she will work genuinely and attend to others' needs with compassion and care; even during times of challenge.

5. Having a high EQ means being able to control yourself in all situations. Your fellow employee shouts at you angrily for some unknown reason. Given this scenario, would you be able to control your emotions and not act the same way he did? You see, EQ is connected to how we control both our positive and our negative emotions. Think back to some of the decisions in your life you are not proud of. Ask yourself how many of them related to a lack of self-control or a lack of impulse control? The answer may be surprising.

Do you have greater clarity around what emotional intelligence and emotional quotient are? Do you agree that it is more important than being "book-intelligent" or having a high IQ? Can you see why EQ is the key to success? I refer to emotional intelligence as the missing link. You know it when you see it... even if you cannot identify it. The challenge is when emotional intelligence is missing it is not always easy to identify. It is often clear that a problem exists but exactly what the problem is may be a mystery.

Knowing what you know about emotional intelligence I have a challenge for you. Ask yourself this question: are you an emotionally intelligent person at home and at work? If the answer is yes, you are on the right track! Continue along this path, strengthening your EQ skills as you go, and you could be well on your way to success. If your answer is no, do not worry. Emotional intelligence is a set of skills you can improve with focus and a sound strategy. Regardless of where you are today, you cannot go wrong investing in yourself and improving your emotional intelligence skills.

Is improving your emotional intelligence on your priority list?

http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Is-Emotional-Intelligence-and-How-Does-It-Impact-the-Workplace?&id=9728886

3 Self Help Principles to Effectively Handle Anyone

Have you ever found yourself in a situation or predicament where you just can't seem to get along with another person, or merely communicate in such a way for any sole reason at all? Whether it being achieving a certain desire or providing potentially beneficial advice that the selected other can't seem to understand. Feeling like you have tried everything? Fear not-The purpose of this post has you an old, yet very simple but seemingly forgotten self-help principles to aid your irrefutable frustration regarding such a common issue.

There are times in life where we find ourselves bewildered at our abilities to deal with other people, sometimes you're unsure whether it's you, them or the weather (for many reasons) nor come to terms with the complexity of exactly what is making such a task seem impossible.

Listed below are 3, easily digestible principles to keep in mind for effectively handling anyone; that when learnt and practised, will seem effortless. Enjoy.

Self-Help Principle 1: Never critique, complain or castigate.

Let's begin with a short parable. A man with an infamous reputation is often a feared criminal, in this sense, he is considered evil by his wrongdoing and acts of injustice. It is this injustice that society and its conventional values view this person contrary to the norm.

On a particular night in London, dozens of police officers were heard scrambling in and around Oxford Circus tube station as gunshots lit up the night. Screams and despair spread as the night grew older, rumour has it that one of London's most wanted was spotted inside and once noticed, took siege of human lives as form of leverage. Thousands of people listened and waited close behind the human blockade of officers, nothing like it had ever been seen before on the tracks of London. When this man was captured, Captain S. Montgomery stated that the man was unknowingly to the public, an enemy of the state previously turned rogue for reasons undisclosed, "He will disregard all consequences of behaviour," said the Captain, "and will kill in the blink of an eye."

The question we must ruminate is, how did this mysterious man regard himself? We know, because it is only until after finding in the residence of this man evidence that may be mutually exclusive with these intentions. a letter labelled, "To my younger self." And, as it read: "Beneath this vessel was a heart of gold, one that too many, times left cold."

Not too long before this, this man was going about his morning to surprise his girlfriend out-of-town near West Sussex. After he had arrived and noticed another male in the bed. Without saying a word, he leaped through the window and drew his gun, the gun shot and the air shattered. The bullet tore through space and silence fell upon him in its wake. He spoke but his words were lost in the quiet. That was the killer who said "Beneath this vessel was a heart of gold, one that too many, times left cold." The man was sentenced to death. When he was upon his last few hours, do you think he said, "This is what I get for killing people?" No, he said "This is what I get for doing what any man would do."

The point of this story is exactly this: This man did not blame himself for anything. Would you say that is an unusual thought process for criminals? I think not, now ponder this for a minute and ask yourself, if these men and women behind bars do not blame themselves for acts of such sin, what about the people who you and I have come in contact with? People do not criticise themselves, not for anything, no matter the severity or margin that they may be so very wrong by.

B.F Skinner, a world-famous psychologist had proved with his experiments that animals respond and learn much more efficiently when being rewarded with good behaviour and retain that information rather than castigated for poor behaviour. Further studies also proved that the same theory indeed applies to humans. In self-help we must be self-aware and acknowledge that the person we feel the need to correct or critique will probably justify himself/herself for what ever the reason may be. Perhaps even critique us in return?

Do you know of someone who you aspire to change or improve? perhaps a partner, friend, colleague etc. Why not begin with the man in the mirror? This is much, much more profitable and long-term efficient, and is also the pinnacle of self-help improvisation. Remember that before trying to handle others, that you are dealing with creatures of emotion, master this and things will fall in just the right places.

Self-Help Principle 2: Show a little appreciation.

There are roughly eight wants in life that we truly desire, I will label these; the eight things we desire most. We will be elaborating on solely one of these wants in this principle. The principle analysed and laid out is "The desire of importance." If you're interested in the other seven then you can head here.

Majority of these wants are more or less satisfied throughout our journeys, although there is one longing, deep, heart-wrenching desire that is satisfied rarely. I think you guessed it, the desire of importance. Who doesn't like a compliment? One of the most, if not the most sought after craving in life is the gratification of appreciation, hence the word "craving" not desire, but for appreciation and not importance. The person that can acknowledge this is all well, good and possibly on their way. However, to grasp this information and strictly apply it whenever you get the chance, this person will hold people in the palms of their hands.

The desire of importance has been around for centuries, this desire even stems off the infamous quote I'm sure you've heard "We buy things we don't like, to impress people we don't even know, with money we don't even have." It is why the rich build the biggest houses that you and I both know they can't make use of, it is why you feel the need to wear the latest fashion styles, it is why you want to drive the coolest car, this desire even impacts the way you talk about your brilliant partner or children. Some even fall victim into partaking in criminal activities, joining a gang or going as far as your imagination serves you, why? The answer is merely ego, the craving for appreciation, the desire of importance.

An easy way to begin: Bring to the table genuine enthusiasm among your people, appreciation and encouragement to others for small things, lead to a large impact. Positive reinforcement is actually critically important at times but be careful not to flatter. Flattery and appreciation are two very different things, the difference is 'sincerity'. One comes from the 'heart' and the other from the mouth. One is sincere and the other has an ulterior motive.

Again - the difference is 'sincerity'.

One comes from the 'heart' and the other from the mouth. One is sincere and the other has an ulterior motive.

What do average people do? The exact opposite.

If one does not approve or fancy something, they will scold their minions, partners and so on and so forth; if they happen to fancy or approve of it, most of the time they say nothing. Let us stop thinking of ourselves, our accomplishments and our desires. Let's attempt to analyse the person we wish to interact with and try to acknowledge their traits, disregard the flattery and acquire some genuine, real appreciation. Do this often and the people on the receiving end will hold your words tight, for longer than you can remember their faces.

Self-Help Principle 3: Give the person an incentive.

Let us begin with a bite size parable by D. Carnegie. A man is in charge of how he spends his time, this man enjoys fishing as his selected hobby and often spent the summertime in Maine. "I Personally am fond of strawberries and cream," said D. Carnegie, "but I have began to notice, fish prefer worms." This brilliant man did not think about what he wanted whilst fishing, he thought about what the fish wanted. So why not use this perfect little allegory and apply it when fishing for people?

Why be futile and converse about our wants? We are interested in what we want and others are interested in what they want, you may seldom stumble upon the occasion where others are also interested in your wants as you share a common goal or desire. But the rest of us are like you, only invested in what we want. Do you see where this is heading? The only way to strike influence and be able to handle somebody in these occasions is to converse about their wants,their desires, and you know what else? You have to show them how to get it.

Visualise yourself in a future situation where you are, the one attempting to get somebody to do something or change something. For example; You want your child to stay in and refrain from going out as they have an exam to attend the next morning, don't stand there and lecture them talking about what you want, we all know the answer and reasoning behind your want; but instead show them how heading out may impact the outcome of their grade scores and achieving that future opportunity.

Another parable to provide insight is; Mr Ralph Emerson and his son were trying to get their calf into the barn, however they inevitably made the common mistake and were only thinking about what they wanted. Can you guess what the calf was thinking about? If you've caught on you would assume (and you're correct) the calf is thinking only of what he wants, so the calf had centred his weight and refused to move. A bystander, the housemaid had been observing the entire situation, unbeknown to Ralph and his son, she had a broad perception of her surroundings, she thought of what the calf wanted; so she placed her maternal finger inside the calf's mouth and let the calf suck on her finger as she patiently guided him into the barn.

Tomorrow you may find yourself in a situation where you want to persuade somebody to do something. Before any form of communication, stop and ask yourself the question: "How can I make this person want to do this?" This question will not only stop absolute inefficiency and possibly embarrassing conversations ending with futile chatter of your desires, but give the person an incentive to do something. He who is capable of doing this, has the universe with him.

https://ezinearticles.com/?3-Self-Help-Principles-to-Effectively-Handle-Anyone&id=9930673

Message From the Universe: Your Time Has Come and It Looks FABULOUS

"So what if it takes a long time?

So what if it's already taken longer than you thought?

So what if it will still take longer?

The day will nevertheless arrive, as it always does, when all your prior efforts, determination, and persistence will seem a paltry price indeed as you are lifted irrevocably higher, as if by chariots of fire, into realms previously unimagined, and then you'll think to yourself, "Wow, that was fast."

I can hear the music now,

The Universe"

This post of the Universe gave me chills as I read it. Many have told me how my posts inspire them during difficult moments in their lives. These interpretations are written from the heart, because I have somewhat of a deep connection with my spiritual self. Being self-aware of who I am and what I can do in my life is crucial to understanding how others suffer. Everyone you will cross in your life should be spoken with respect as many are battling difficult challenges in their lives. You might come across someone who looks and sound very calm from the outside but is dealing with a lot in the inside. Never judge a book by its cover. We all work very hard to achieve excellence, financial freedom, successful relationships, either business or personal, optimal health and so on and so forth. Time is a crucial element for all this to happen. The Universe understands your hard work but don't blame it for throwing you a few jabs to test you. Yes, these jabs might hurt and in most cases, they do. However, will you let life put you down and keep you there permanently or will you fight back and work harder? Who is smarter? Who is more determined? Hopefully you. So, what are you going to do today to make all this happen?

"The space-time continuum is a mathematical model that joins space and time into a single idea. This space-time is represented by a model where space is three-dimensional and time has the role of the fourth dimension" (Wikipedia). If that is the meaning of Time and space, so why do we all compress it into that ONE idea, that ONE thought that can control your present and future. The key here is to possess the right attributes that will guarantee your success in life. Having passion for what you do, determination, burning desire, persistence, ambition is what you need to tell life to go screw itself and you not being deterred by any obstacles or challenges you will face during your journey. Your time will come to shine and take pride of what you've accomplished. This time is around the corner, the fourth dimension is showing its face. You need to realize that it takes effort and energy to fight for what you want and not let anything stop you. There is nothing worst than regretting not doing the things that you believe in. Focus on your path and I can promise you that the Universe will clear the path and will allow you safe heaven towards your destination.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-Your-Time-Has-Come-and-It-Looks-FABULOUS&id=9572149

Message From the Universe: The Miracle of Life

"The reason most people don't recognize the miracles that are performed on their behalf is because there's just so bloomin' many of them.

Like this very moment...

And this one...

And this one...

Ahhh-h-h-h,

The Universe"

We all need to be self-aware of your direct surroundings and open your eyes to what is going on in your life. You might think nothing is moving in the right direction, probably thinking that you are running on a treadmill and headed nowhere. It may feel like you are pursuing a dream that seems out of reach, working day and night without seeing the horizon. You need to remember that as long as you are making that first step towards reaching your goal, you are already on the right track to accomplishing it. The line of success is never a straight one, and there will be turns, ups and downs, just like a roller coaster in an amusement park. Life behaves the same way, and it looks for the strong minded people to give them the opportunities of a lifetime. Do not allow some uncertainties derail you from your tracks. You need to visualize everyday how your life will be and how you will tackle the challenges that will be presented to you. No one likes disappointments, that's a given, but you also need to thrive during these difficult times and allow yourself to learn from your mistakes and move forward, no matter what.

Miracles happen everyday, whether you notice them or not. Look around you and be aware of the changes that are happening. Never dismiss anything as being coincidence. Everything happens for a reason and despite it being either good or bad for you, it has its reason to happen at a certain time in your life. The question you need to ask yourself: " How much do I want my life to change for the better? How hard am I willing to work to make all my dreams come true? How tough am I to keep on moving forward when all the signs seems to be against me?" If you ask yourself these questions, you need to look for the answers from within. You are the ONLY one able to answer them. Being self-aware of who you are is already a miracle in itself, as many humans have never really discovered who they really were throughout their lives on Earth. Try discovering yourself and your mission on this planet, and focus on how you can better yourself on a daily basis. You are not the same person today as you were 5 years ago and you will not be the same person 5 years from now. Embrace that new person from within and stay open minded to all the great things that will happen to you today and tomorrow.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-The-Miracle-of-Life&id=9571096

Peace of Mind

Peace of mind or inner peace is a state when your brain is free from the thoughts of distress. The state when your feelings and emotions reach the level of existential bummer. You submit yourself to your creator whole-heartedly. You are no longer convinced by the statement that there is no absolution. You find a way to map the radiant thinking process of your brain against the flow states. Inner peace is a feeling of relief and calmness. You are actually close to your Lord and your Lord is close to you. You find yourself emotionally present and no longer lost in some kind of fantasy.

Inner peace is the state when you no longer question about your fate. You finally accept the fact that life is not about victories or losses, but it is all about a continuous process of growth. The situations where you are just not thinking about your future, but try hard to live in present. You are no longer controlled by the horrible incidents of the past. You finally accept the truth that you are the sum of your experiences and each bad experience had made you stronger. There is little goodness in every bad experience.

The state where you connect your soul to something that is beyond this materialistic world, to something that is greater than yourself. You are self-aware and self-conscious. You know your way and where you are heading. You don't need anyone acceptance. You start keeping everyone at arm's length. You accept the truth that everything is in your Allah's hand. HE is all-knowing and all-hearing. HE is there for you even when no one else is. You finally find peace in your prayers. Your heart just throws the burden of all negative thoughts. You just ask your Lord to give you some purpose in life.

Inner peace gives you strength to go beyond your constraints and become selfless. You beg him not to take you back into something he has taken you out from. You become courageous enough to leave the table where respect is no longer served. You become aware of your critical inner voice. You become ready to take risks and dive into the river of future curiosity. You fill the room with your sense of knowingness. You become more stable in your decisions and less judgmental. Inner peace is a state where things like anxiety and depression, cannot control you anymore. You are free in your head and heart. It is not easy to attain this peaceful state of being; it demands a long and continuous struggle. Once you enter into this state of blissful happiness, you become mentally immortal.

ezinearticles.com/?Peace-of-Mind&id=9905201

How to Eliminate Self-Sabotage for Good!

As we become more self-aware we start noticing patterns of self-sabotage in our lives. Self-sabotage occurs when we find ourselves getting very close to reaching a goal, finding happiness in a relationship, success in our careers, or even becoming debt free, and then just when we are on the right path right where we want to be, BOOM! Something bad happens to stop us dead in our tracks forcing us to detour without the opportunity to reach success, fulfill an accomplishment, experience deep love, or become financially free. Examples could be that we suddenly become very ill right when we are about to reach an important goal or even right after we have reached an important goal, or right before we go on a vacation a million issues come up that keep us from fully enjoying our away time, or perhaps you are just dollars away from eliminating that credit card debt and then all of a sudden an unexpected bill is received that requires you to place another charge on your card... Some may say that these are just bad coincidences that keep happening over and over, but I don't believe in coincidences. {"In mathematics, two angles that are said to coincide fit together perfectly. The word coincidence does not describe luck or mistakes. It describes that which fits together perfectly." - from the book Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer} In essence, these coincidences, these 'happenings', are matching our exact vibrational alignment. Remember, we create our realities and the Universe is responding to the way we 'feel', our personal vibrational signature. If there is any un-healed areas of your life, and most likely there is, your sub-conscious mind is likely harboring your day to day experience while attempting to deal with un-dealt matters. In order to eliminate the counterproductive sabotage behavior, you must correct the issues at their root while taking a pro-active and positive approach.

Here's how you can eliminate Self-sabotage for good:

1. Become aware of the sabotage pattern. Voice this in some way either verbal or written. Ask yourself (and answer): In a perfect life, would I do this thing at all? If so, what would I change to make it more enjoyable? If not, what would I rather do?

2. Take ownership and stop blaming the rest of the world for your problems. Then forgive yourself and really mean it.

3. Hire a good Therapist or Shadow Coach to help heal experiences from your childhood and past.

4. Remember, it doesn't matter if you fall off the horse. All that matters is how long you take before jumping back on. #neverstop

5. Keep your main focus on moving forward and envision your ideal scenario (this is key!)

In many cases people sabotage their selves over their entire life without consciously realizing that they are running in circles. In other cases we come to our senses and realize that we are sabotaging ourselves, but we don't do anything about it - we don't know what needs to be done and we remain stuck weaving in and out of bad habits. Now that you know what to do, print this article and cut out the five steps above. Keep them in a journal, planner, bulletin board or somewhere you will be reminded from time to time.

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Eliminate-Self-Sabotage-for-Good!&id=9029590

Message From the Universe: Start Focusing on Yourself, TODAY!

"Those who are not yet spiritually wise, simply cannot appreciate, or even recognize, those who are.

Fortunately, you can still blow their socks off as you live the truths you've uncovered.

Hubba, hubba - 

The Universe"

Being self aware is a crucial element to know how you can progress in your own life, not just financially but primarily spiritually. Money will come and go, but your soul stays with you for eternity, even when your physical body dies. Take care of your soul, take care of your spirituality by understanding who you are as a person. Those who suffer from mental illness have created a disconnect between then conscious and spiritual mind, and some chemical imbalances in the brain have contributed to increase the gap between both parties. The subconscious mind can only be involved if you practice meditation on a daily basis, as you can reboot your brain and eradicate the evil spirits. You have the control to do that but in most cases, it is too late to access the power of your subconscious. Medication is a must and that destroys more of the good brain cells than the bad. I am not a psychiatrist so I can't really go deeper and discuss about the purpose of medication for these kinds of medical cases and advise anyone what to use to bring back their sanity.

The key is to focus on who you are, and stop looking at what others are doing. You are your own person, your own self and that shouldn't be taken lightly. As misery attracts misery, spiritual people will also attract other spiritual people, so do not worry about who is around you because whoever is, are definitely the people you want to have around. Focus on being yourself, understanding who you are, being self aware and stop concerning about what others think about you. Others people opinion about you is NOT really any of your business. So why get concerned? Who cares about what others think about your belief, your culture or your way of life? Once you start understanding that you control everything when it comes to your life, you will start LIVING a life. Why not start today?

http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-Start-Focusing-on-Yourself,-TODAY!&id=9563642

Embracing the Child Sensitivities Within (By Steve Wickham)

I've become more aware recently of the child sensitivities within, which are common to us all. It's easy to see these sensitivities within children - I've certainly seen them in my pre-school-aged son, and within the students I work with. But we don't see the dynamics of sensitivity within ourselves, or perhaps we're aware we're oversensitive.

It was when my son fell and injured his arm suddenly that I was reminded of his sensitivity - and of mine. Not only was his sensitivity piqued more than normal, as an experienced father (I've been doing it now for quarter of a century!) I still felt all at sea, even if I had the composure to do what needed doing in getting him to hospital. Immediately, I was in a mode of wanting to protect him, and that instinctive drive was, if anything, an overreaction. Call it love in fear for the worst. The more sensitive he is, the more sensitive I am. And that corresponds with the sensitivities-of-response I share with my daughters when they're vulnerable.

This interaction with our sensitivities sparked the following thought:

There is a continuum of sensitivity based on vulnerability-and-self-protection in the world. The sensitive person who is uncomfortably vulnerable, because they haven't yet harnessed the protective behaviours they need to offset their vulnerabilities, is especially vulnerable to bullies, who overcapitalise on inappropriate self-protection. Then there's the response of the person who is well on their way within the journey of integrating appropriate self-protection with their vulnerability. The mature person's response is a balance between appropriate self-protection with their vulnerability.

***

Sensitive people become targets of bullies because bullies are uncomfortable with the vulnerability shared. Bullies exist within a bubble of inappropriate self-protection; a façade of veneer-thin strength (really, a house of cards). So, they have less emotional health than a sensitive person with a lack of self-protection through inappropriate levels of self-disclosure. A bully has neither vulnerability nor appropriate self-protection to draw on.

Sensitive people can grow through mastery of appropriate protection, which is knowing when and how to be appropriately vulnerable.

We're all sensitive. For some it's obvious, for others a lack of sensitivity is a façade, and for others, again, it's a journey to appropriately self-protect.

God desires we would all relate appropriately with that which He's made us sensitive. It's a journey, however, in becoming appropriately self-aware and socially-aware so we employ appropriate self-protection.

We can think of the true sensitivities within us all as the child growing up and being allowed to be the child again. Adulthood should bear all the advantages of childhood without having to bear with the disadvantages.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Embracing-the-Child-Sensitivities-Within&id=9567958

6 Struggles I Had To Give Up To Be Happy

Every time I think about my childhood, I get angry. A time that should have been filled with happy moments spent learning and growing was ruined by physical abuse. This wasn’t just spanking — it went far beyond that. Chairs, lamp switches, and sticks were used as instruments of punishment. The scars I developed went far deeper than the surface of my skin.

At 17, I'd had enough. I remember coming home from school to two angry parents. They had somehow heard I was dating someone at work. I assured them I wasn't, but I guess they didn't believe me. Before I could say anything else, I was being beaten with a stick. Rather than continuing to subject myself to that, I chose to live on the streets

It was hard leaving a two-parent home — and my two brothers and sisters — but I had to do it. I left without a dollar to my name but felt free for the first time in my life. I dropped out of high school and got three jobs just to survive. Once I got myself on my feet, I studied and earned my GED.

Once I'd gotten off the streets and gotten a place of my own, I started trying to build a life. But I still had to recover from the physical and mental abuse and the trauma I experienced while homeless. That's when the scars opened up wide. Every relationship I had — platonic or romantic — was a struggle for me. I couldn’t open up and face the demons that terrorized me daily. Eventually, I realized I wouldn't be able to find happiness until I dealt with them. Here are a few of my struggles and the solutions that helped me conquer them:

1. I felt anger from my abusive past.

I grew up with strict punishments that involved being spanked and more. The spanking wasn’t limited to my butt; I was beaten all over my body. This led me to be an angry adult who always wanted to resolve arguments in a physical way. I also struggled with fits of anger at random times. Through counseling and becoming self-aware, I was able to get better. I still struggle with anger, but it’s not the crazy outbursts that I used to give in to. I gained control after months of therapy and taking up meditation.

2. I was frustrated by my lack of education.

Because I had dropped out of high school, I always felt dumb. There were things I missed by dropping out that hurt my dream of being a writer. I was often frustrated by my lack of grammar skills and I let that hold me back. Eventually, rather than just whine at the universe, I decided to work twice as hard to learn what I wanted to know. I read books on grammar, took some online courses, and became an editor at The Good Men Project to learn. Today, I’m the author of four books — three of them traditionally published — which have sold more than 100,000 copies.

3. I had developed unhealthy coping mechanisms.

I turned to food in moments of depression and pain. I stopped exercising and slept too much as a way to escape. At the worst, I was 170 pounds overweight. Eventually, I prioritized healthy habits. I regularly started exercising and watched what I ate. Every choice I made supported living a healthy lifestyle. I lost those 170 pounds in a two-year span, after finally acknowledging the source of my poor choices.

4. I suffered from a lack of self-esteem.

The excess weight and lack of education contributed to my poor self-image. I felt fat and stupid. Losing the weight and chasing my dream of becoming a writer — despite my fears — is how I learned to love what makes me. For most of my life, I’ve battled self-limiting beliefs because of my past.

I let my abusive past, lack of education, and internal struggles prevent me from taking the first steps to creating change in my life. When I finally decided to move forward anyway, I started on the journey to a life I love.

5. I was ruled by doubt, fear, and the negative voices of others.

Making any change is hard, and it’s especially hard when you’re starting from a disadvantage. I had to overcome my doubt, the fear of failure, and input from people in my life who said my dreams were impossible. I wrote for months on my blog without seeing any results. Then, out of the blue, I got an email from a random person saying my writing was helping him. That was all I needed to continue to push forward.

6. I got involved in toxic relationships.

The negative people became toxic by trying to project their self-limiting beliefs onto my life and dreams. I had a best friend at the time who did everything he could to persuade me I was crazy. I asked for his support, but he was convinced my dreams weren't possible. I had to purge the negativity from my life to move forward, and that meant putting distance between myself and certain people.

It wasn't easy to part ways with friends, but I was honest about what I needed in my life and told them all that I hoped we could reconnect at some point in the future. It felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders when I did.

I can honestly say that I’m happy with my life today. I have beaten my demons through counseling, self-awareness, and concerted effort, and by opening up to the woman I love. The scars have healed. You can conquer your demons too. Don't just try to shove them deeper inside yourself. Get counseling, talk to a trusted friend or family member, take up meditation. Don't stop until you figure out what works for you and you experience real healing.

Life is hard, and it doesn’t get easier. If you want to be happy, you have to make that choice, every day. Open up, get help, and forgive. That's how you can let go of the past, the painful memories, and begin to move toward the life you want. It’s not easy, but it is possible.

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-23277/6-struggles-i-had-to-give-up-to-be-happy.html

A 6-Step Program for Improving Your Communication Skills

Technology is involved in almost everything we do. There are few moments in life when it has no influence. Yet when you are face to face with someone, in a real and authentic interaction, you are on your own. There is no time delay to think of your response and no screen to hide your reaction. Everything is happening in the moment.

Without sound communication skills, an excited sales person can seem aggressive, an employee in need of guidance can seem like they lack competence and a leader wanting to help can come across as a micro manager. Effective interpersonal communication stems deeper than the words that are spoken, in fact it lays in the balance of how self-aware and emotionally intelligent each person is.

What is self-awareness?

Self-awareness is having a clear perception of your character and personality. It is being aware of how you feel towards certain things, your behavior in different situations, your strengths, weaknesses and any habits you have picked up throughout your life. A self-aware person can look in the mirror and be brutally honest about how they are internally and also recognize how they appear to others externally.

By being able to recognize certain characteristics about yourself, you can take advantage of the positive ones and work on changing the negative ones. In a social setting, such as a networking event, you could adjust your behavior to align with the people or environment you are in.

What is emotional intelligence?

Connected to self-awareness, it is the ability to monitor your own and other people’s emotions. By being able to recognize these emotions, you can use the information to guide your thinking and behavior. In a heated conversation, you could control your own emotions and sense how someone else is truly feeling, before responding in the most appropriate way.

Here are 6 steps to advance your communication skills through self-awareness and emotional intelligence:

1. Determine your relationship value.

Begin by looking at your role within your company and determine how you want your colleagues, employees and clients to see you. What are your strengths? How can they help or influence others? What character values are important for others to see in you? Imagine if you were to leave or retire, how would you want everyone to remember you?

2. Alignment.

Next look at the above values to see if they align with your current behavior and how you treat those around you. People will often feel self-conscious as opposed to self-aware, when they are acting in a way that does not align with their core values. As a rule of thumb: If you treat everyone the same way you expect to be treated, then you don’t have to worry about what others think of you.

3. Objective.

Be clear on what your objective is before entering a conversation. Know what you are hoping to get out of the interaction and let it be known to the other person(s) from the beginning. If they know what your intentions are they won’t be surprised with any questions.

4. Understand your emotions.

Take time to recognize how you feel in certain situations. We often try to brush off any feelings of jealousy, anger or impatience when they arise, but those emotions come to the surface for a reason. It’s critical to spend a few moments to take note of them. The better you can understand your own emotions, the better you will be able to read others.

5. Empathize with others.

Emotional intelligence is not about reading someone else’s mind. It is the ability to empathetically put yourself in someone else’s shoes and sense how they must be feeling. Take time to internalize things that are happening around you, recognize how they make you feel and see how others react as well.

6. Control your emotions.

Despite our good intentions, emotions can get the best of us sometimes. However, your goal isn’t to eliminate your feelings, it is to monitor and control them in the moment. When you are able to do this, you can ensure that your behavior aligns with your values and supports the objectives you want to achieve. Every single interaction you have is perfect ground to practice recognizing and governing your emotions. Over time these emotions will no longer determine how you react, but instead be used to support what you say.

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/245086

How To Manage Your Anger And Emotions In 3 Simple Steps

Are you quick to lose your temper? Are you prone to loneliness, envy, frustration or other negative emotions? Being overcome with such feelings is natural; but learning how to manage your anger and emotions, especially in high-pressure situations, is an important and invaluable skill.

Here are 3 simple steps in learning how to manage your anger and emotions to become a happier, well-balanced person.

Step 1: Become Self-Aware.

Being self-aware means taking the time to notice what you're feeling or what you're thinking, and why you feel and think that way.

Be honest to yourself. Admitting that you are hurt, jealous or angry doesn't mean that you are an overly-sensitive, resentful, livid or "bad" person. It just means that you have and feel emotions, just like any other person.

Understanding where these emotions are coming from will help you recognize them better in the future, so you can be better prepared at responding to them in a more composed and rational manner.

Step 2: Express Yourself.

You have probably heard that keeping your feelings bottled up inside is unhealthy. Learning how to manage your anger and emotions means you find a healthy and constructive outlet so you can better handle them.

Tell yourself it's alright to feel angry, hurt or sad. Communicate how you feel. Talk to other people about your emotions.

If the situation permits you to, raise your voice or use gestures. Just remember that you can think and feel at the same time, so be mindful of the boundaries and don't resort to violence.

Step 3: Channel Your Emotions.

These strong negative feelings don't just vanish, that much is understandable. You can learn how to manage your anger and emotions by giving this negativity a turnaround.

Take a deep breath and clear your mind. The trick is to think about the negative emotion and respond in the opposite, through constructive and practical means.

For example, when you feel so angry that you want to throw things around, go to the gym instead or go out for a run. Think also arts and crafts, journaling, petting animals, cooking and baking, and more.

It's normal to have strong feelings sometimes, but when they get in the way of living a productive and happy life, it's important to learn how to manage your anger and emotions. It may be challenging at first; but the more you practice being in control, the easier it will be in the long run.

https://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Manage-Your-Anger-And-Emotions-In-3-Simple-Steps&id=7001655

9 Tips to Help You Strengthen Your Integrity

Learn how to take the high ground—because integrity is a core value essential to trustworthiness.

                           

If you ask company executives to reveal their “core values,” integrity is always one of their first answers, says Joel C. Peterson, chairman of the board of JetBlue Airways and a Stanford University professor of management. The single most important ingredient to business success is trust, Peterson says, and trust starts with integrity.

Entrepreneur and angel investor Amy Rees Anderson borrows from C.S. Lewis’s famous quote, defining integrity as “doing the right thing all the time, even when no one is looking—especially when no one is looking.”

Anderson offers many examples of acting without integrity: CEOs who overstate their projected earnings because they don’t want to be replaced by their boards of directors. Competitors who lie to customers to seal a deal. Customer service reps covering up mistakes because they fear clients will leave. There’s no shortage of high-profile major lapses, too: Bernie Madoff’s long-standing operation of a Ponzi scheme considered to be the largest financial fraud in U.S. history, Michael Milken’s conviction for violating U.S. securities laws after being the one-time toast of Wall Street, and Major League Baseball star Alex Rodriguez’ use of performance-enhancing drugs.

But what does a person acting with integrity look like? Positive examples may be harder to find. Anderson, who lectures on entrepreneurship at the University of Utah, believes “there aren’t enough of us saying that sometimes it’s better to lose than to lose your integrity.” A plaque in Anderson’s office reinforces her philosophy: “Do what is right; let the consequences follow.”

That holds true in both personal and professional relationships. “If you don’t have integrity, it bleeds over into other parts of your life,” she says. Peterson agrees, saying that integrity can’t be compartmentalized—that “there is a kind of integrity across all of our behaviors.”

“A Ton of Work”

Acting with integrity can be difficult. “There are plenty of situations that are not altogether clear,” says Peterson, who has collected examples of integrity challenges during his long career in business and academia. In one of them, the chief financial officer of a company where Peterson served on the audit committee was unjustly accused of wrongdoing by a regulator.

“The dilemma: You are spending shareholders’ money to protect the CFO, and if you just fire the guy it would all go away. On the other hand, that’s the wrong thing to do, and it could destroy this man’s life,” Peterson explains. So he asks whether you make that decision according to your own standards or the standards of shareholders to whom you answer. “We fought. We said [the regulator’s action] was wrong. We won’t cave, and we won’t be bullied.” The outcome: The regulator dropped the matter, and the board’s audit committee sent a message to the company that “integrity matters here.”

The committee’s action represents the “organizational integrity” that Peterson deals with in his own professional life and in his management and leadership courses at Stanford. Organizational integrity is “a broader notion that embraces the idea of alignment, where what you do and what you say are consistent,” Peterson says. “Think of a bridge or a structure with integrity; they’re all bolted together in a way that can withstand shocks. This is the stuff of management and leadership, and it takes a ton of work to build.”

Building Integrity

“Talk to the people around you” to get a handle on your integrity, recommends Tony Simons, author of The Integrity Dividend: Leading by the Power of Your Word. “Find ways to get honest feedback from others. You need to find out if—and that goes double if you’re a boss—you have the appropriate level of trust. Integrity stands as a driver of trust.” Anderson advises that you “let those around you call you out…. Be willing to have people police you. Your trusted advisers [should be] people who will tell you whether you’re acting with integrity or whether there’s a better way to handle something.”

As for building your integrity and modeling it for others, Simons, Peterson and Anderson offer these suggestions:

• Fulfill your promises… to your staff, your investors, everyone. If you break a promise, you must apologize, but don’t let this become a pattern.

• Keep appointments. Doing so affects you professionally and personally (practicing your faith, staying fit, being present for family, etc.).

• Before you make a commitment, “stop and soberly reflect on whether you are 100 percent sure you can deliver,” says Simons. “You need to be dispassionate in that evaluation.”

• Get comfortable with saying no. No one can say yes to everything and follow through on it all.

• Examine how you react in knee-jerk situations, as well as how you make longer-term commitments (e.g., attending events, completing projects, etc.). Use this introspection to become self-aware, keep score and improve. (You can also use this behavioral yardstick for determining whether others act with integrity.)

• Polish your communication skills. Reread that email or report before you send it; plan what you’ll say in oral presentations and phone calls. “Fuzzy communication leads to broken promises,” says Simons. Ask someone to proofread written communications and point out ambiguities before you distribute them.

• Consider the habits and skills you need to develop to enhance your integrity. You might need to stop certain actions (e.g., speaking impulsively or sugarcoating your responses). And you might need to improve on others: building your personal courage (because fear holds you back from acting with integrity—Peterson’s CFO might have been fired without others showing courage). Issue apologies “faster, simpler and aimed more at containing the damage [you may have done] than at justifying yourself,” says Simons.

• Peterson advises to take great care with the language you use, especially when dealing with sensitive issues such as sexual preference, racism and religion.

• Avoid people who lack integrity. “Do not do business with them,” Anderson writes in a blog post. “Do not associate with them. Do not make excuses for them. It’s important to realize that others pay attention to those you have chosen to associate with, and they will inevitably judge your character by the character of your friends.”

Gauging Your Integrity

Do you act with integrity? You can make an accurate assessment by asking yourself these six questions devised by Don Phin, a lawyer, author and vice president of Strategic Business Solutions at the compliance and training solutions company ThinkHR.

1. Am I willing to say what I’m thinking?

2. Am I willing to risk being wrong?

3. Do I want my child or someone else I love to do that? If not, then why am I doing it?

4. Does this conduct make me a better person?

5. Am I Ieading by example?

6. Am I taking 100 percent responsibility?

http://www.success.com/article/9-tips-to-help-you-strengthen-your-integrity

8 Positively Life Changing Ways To Crank Up Your Level Of Consciousness

Would you like to improve your health, forge strong meaningful relations, accelerate your ability to manifest and fine tune your spiritual antenna at the same time?

Well you can. You just need to raise your level of consciousness so that you are vibrating at higher frequency. But what does it mean to raise your consciousness.

In a nutshell, raising your consciousness simply means to become more self-aware, to be more in tune with your thoughts, emotions and beliefs, and to broaden your perception of reality. But raising your level of consciousness stretches beyond the confines of your own awareness. It involves a deeper understanding of your external environment, and understanding that everyone and everything is connected.

The problem is we have suppressed our level of awareness through conditioning, which derives from our life's experiences. We lose that connection with our inner-self and become alienated from our core-being. In fact, it wasn't until I approached the age of thirty that I really started to question who the person was staring back at me in the mirror!

I had become so disassociated from myself that I really struggled to connect with my inner-self. I had been conditioned by my thoughts, feelings and emotions that I had experienced all day, everyday for the most part of my life. If you can relate to this, then read on to learn some practical tips on how to raise your consciousness.

#1 Actively Cultivate Mindfulness

If you're going to raise your consciousness, you need to cultivate the art of mindfulness. Mindfulness means to live in the present moment only. The thing is, if you're not mindful than you're going to fall victim to your thought processes and emotions which keep you busily distracted. Acknowledge and slay that inner-voice. Soak up your environment and pay attention to what's going on around you. If you're taking a stroll, then really tune into your external environment, acknowledge your footsteps, the sounds of nature, the suns radiant glow, and all that's going on around you.

#2 Don't Hesitate To Meditate

The best tool at your disposal for cultivating mindfulness and delving into your inner-self is meditation. When you meditate, you develop a deeper mind - body connection, which helps you better tune into your thoughts, feelings and emotions. It offers a window of serenity where you can tune out of your external environment, and tune into your mind where you can quietly observe your thoughts. As you become more practiced in meditation, you learn to rest in the growing space of emptiness between thoughts which helps you explore the boundaries of your mind, and you'll witness the peace and joy that comes from authentic meditation.

#3 Cultivate Selective Ignorance

You would be surprised how much of an influence external sources can have on your own consciousness! Seriously, if you're going to become a more conscious being, you need to be mindful of external sources of information. Media is key here! The media are known to portray a negative picture which keeps us living in a state of fear and anxiety. This negative programming means you're unknowingly lowering your consciousness. Be mindful of this and choose to empower yourself with feedback and solicitations that are positive in nature.

#4 Love Openly and Freely

This is something I'm working on a lot myself lately! It's easy to allow past conflicts or conditioned thoughts to stop us from loving openly and freely. Let go of those prejudices such as stereotyping, religious beliefs, or branding and realize that we're all connected beings. When matter is broken down we are all one, it's only our ego that separates us. In the spiritual sense we are all brothers and sisters. Learn to love others openly regardless of sex, race, religion, or any other imposed belief that separates us. This one step alone will help you clear negative energy blocks and you'll more connected to others, including the beauty of nature.

#5 Always Displaying Compassion

Compassion - that's a keyword! Due to the imposed beliefs and prejudices of society it's easy to become self-absorbed and unaware of the needs of others. See a homeless person on the street? Then spare them some change, after all, we are only a paycheck away from being homeless ourselves. Strive to be charitable and caring, attune yourself to the needs of others and you'll be sure to raise your consciousness in the process.

#6 Always Displaying Gratitude

Life truly is a blessing and this is something we need to actively remind ourselves of. Even just being here is a miracle in itself so make it a daily habit to display gratitude. Take a few minutes each morning when you awake and each evening before you retire to bed to display gratitude for the many blessings in your life. Here's an exercise, grab a pen and pad and write down five things you are grateful for today. Once you have written down five things, place the paper in a jar. Now update this jar daily with five new items everyday. Congratulations. You just started your own gratitude jar!

#7 Soaking Up Your Surroundings

If your going to expand your consciousness, you need to understand that everything is connected. We often neglect this simple truth and take nature's beauty for granted. Simple little things like the blossoming buds of spring, birds tweeting away, or a beautiful sunset on the horizon are beautiful expressions that many fail to appreciate. Reconnect with nature and soak up your environment. Remember, without this carefully devised Eco-system we wouldn't be here. That's definitely something to be grateful for.

#8 Learning From Conscious Beings

Learning how to raise your consciousness is much easier if you associate with like-minded individuals who are pursuing the same journey. You can share your experiences and learn from each-other. You'll also find an abundance of resources online dedicated to helping you expand your consciousness. Follow spiritual guru's, "like" fan pages pertaining to consciousness, and strive to get involved with online communities and forums dedicated to helping raise awareness on consciousness.

"No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it." - Albert Einstein.

Are you struggling to live a life of purpose and passion that's filled with happiness?

You know you want a live a positively abundant life, but there's one problem... It's hard!

That is, until NOW.

https://ezinearticles.com/?8-Positively-Life-Changing-Ways-To-Crank-Up-Your-Level-Of-Consciousness&id=9056704