The Intent Behind Our Giving Has A Role In Our Inner Development

I often hear people say that it is good that people receive the help they need, even if the intention of the giver was not one of selflessness. Which means, it doesn't matter what the purpose was, as long as the receiver got what they needed.

I don't know if I agree with that.

I feel that for people on the path of personal development and growth, it is essential to have self-awareness, to understand one's motives for whatever we are doing as knowing our purposes plays a significant role in our growth as well. It helps us to understand self, to enable us to see the shadow aspects (good or bad) surfacing through our unconscious self.

I remember when I used to volunteer at a hospice and at the time I was still relatively young in the area of energy healing work. So I thought it would be a perfect idea to do it for practice as a volunteer. I knew to go in, why I was doing it - It was purely for selfish reasons. I was there to use the old folks as 'test subjects'. And I was confident that the more I practised, the more they were going to benefit from it.

On the surface level, it looked like it was kindness but I was there to practice.

As I started doing the energy work on a weekly basis, I realised that energy work might not necessarily be the right thing for the hospice patients. So I changed the service I was providing to just foot massages. The patients at the hospice day care looked forward to the weekly Touch Therapy. They would all come in their wheelchairs, and they all just wanted someone to speak to. So as I was doing the foot massages and communicating with them, I realised after a period that I was no longer doing it for myself. Sometimes I would find it difficult to go, but I made myself go because I knew that it was a special afternoon for them. I became one of the patient's confidante as she didn't have family and she would pour her heart out to me. She has since passed on, and I am glad that she is in a better space now. Over a period, my intent transformed.

Kindness, we practise it with people as much as we can and even if we volunteer to do something without expectation of anything back in return, we genuinely would like the other party to benefit from what we have shared. So many of us are like this - genuine people who give without any expectations of anything back, not even recognition. I have learned so much from people like these. They have managed to find the balance in giving, making sure others benefit from their giving, at the same time, because they have good standing in society, they have used their good standing to inspire others also to do the same. At the same time, it is not for self-glorification whatsoever. It is not easy to navigate this, and indeed require true authenticity to achieve this balance.

Recently I posted this quote on social media: 'if you are doing something for someone and expecting something back in return you are not doing kindness, you are doing business'. It is true; when we expect something back, when we expect an exchange we are truly doing business. Whether the return to you is some kind of glory or recognition or something intangible, it is just business and no longer about kindness anymore.

Now we have all seen this, where people volunteer their time organisations/charity/institutions to exercise some form of power. Usually, its because they have not experienced any leadership or they have never been in positions of power. So they offer their time for self-gratification, or they do it to gain some self-esteem - not all wrong. The problem with this is they do not even realise their underlying intent. They still believe in the superficial reason that they are there to offer kindness. This is how politics in charity happens! If we give with expectations, be true to it, then the giving has a more definite purpose with no hidden agendas, and it will not come back to bite us.

So I hope that this little sharing is useful for you especially at this time of the year when there are plenty of opportunities for giving. Whatever purpose you have in your giving, be sure of its intent, and you will be able to multiply it many folds.

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The Psychological Release Valve. (By Daniel Brennan)

"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect" - Mark Twain

Since arriving home in late April, it has been non-stop. Playing golf tournaments, traveling more than 7,000 miles in the car, travelling to Eastern Europe and launching a company all take their toll on the body and mind. Would I change any of it? Absolutely not. I enjoy every minute of it, but that doesn't mean it doesn't tire me out. Slowly but surely I have felt myself getting more and more worn out and slightly stressed as I fight the uphill battle of to-do's.

It is true that sometimes, (quite often in my case) you must take the time to press the reset button. Taking the time to pause and reflect is one of the most valuable assets you may have and it can go a long way to being better, longer. Taking a time-out will seem like weakness to some people, but it is the complete opposite. Knowing what you are capable of doing and having the self-awareness to know when too much is too much is an asset that will stand to you. Many people, usually the highly driven ones, will do too much for too long before having a dramatic collapse, much like I did in the latter part of 2015. To refrain from being like me, I advise taking some time to yourself as often as you can.

The question, which you are probably asking yourself now, is how often and for how long should I do this? Well, that's up to you. Taking vacations or extended periods of absence from work, or even the outside world are great ways to recuperate. However, I think there is a better, more sustainable option, that can take less than 10 minutes per day and it is what I call, "The Psychological Release Valve". Thanks to Tim Ferriss for gracing me with this beautiful phrase. The "Psychological Release Valve" (aka, journaling), is a great way to release tension and get your thoughts on paper while also allowing you to plan for the future and remain totally present.

In the bullet points below I talk to myself about why I made the decision I made to take a day off and to pause and reflect. This is solely for reflection, planning and well, writing morning pages.

Today I am taking a day off to do a number of things.

• Rest and Recover.
• Get organized for the coming weeks.
• Prevent burnout/stress. (I feel stress building because of a lack of time to pause and reflect.)
• Refrain from thinking about the future.

Slowly but surely I can feel myself getting burned out. I am enjoying the process so much, it's hard to slow down. But, the question remains, "how fast can you drive your car before you lose control?" I feel life speeding up and beginning to get away from me, so I use today to re-focus and re-align myself.

Happiness is not to be found in circumstance. Happiness is to be found inside and projected out.

Good decision today!

https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Pshychological-Release-Valve&id=9561311

These Decisions Can Increase Your Happiness

When you use smart decisions and self-awareness to shape your life, it will reflect your deepest aspirations and your fondest dreams.

1. Make your life your own. Decide to re-decide. Re-examine your goals and dreams. Don't just assume that what you wanted yesterday is still the right thing for you. Have your goals and dreams changed? Give yourself the freedom to decide today what you want your life to be about.

2. Make your job a joy. Decide to revitalize your career, or try a new one. Ask yourself if you're really happy and stimulated with your work. If you're not, or if you feel unappreciated or frustrated by a lack of advancement, consider a change. Understand the corporate agenda and be realistic about advancement opportunities at your present job. If you feel you need a change, you may be able to move to a different position or department within your company, or you may want to look for a new job entirely. If you stay at your present job, ask for raises and promotions, if you feel that you've earned them.

3. Take it to the bank. Decide to secure your financial position. Get out of debt, keep yourself on a budget, invest your money wisely and keep abreast of your financial situation. Many women allow their partners to take care of financial matters, only to find themselves unprepared if they become divorced or widowed. Remember, financial stress is one of the greatest stressors of all.

4. Why are you here? Decide to create meaning in your life. Identify the purpose and meaning of your life and define why you are here on earth. When you understand your purpose in life, losses are easier to bear and all other decisions are easier to make.

5. Share your bounty. Decide to give something back. Donate money or put your talents, skills and experience to use by volunteering for causes you care about. People who volunteer have been found to be happier and healthier than those who don't. Remember that charity begins at home, so give to your own family, friends and neighbors.

https://ezinearticles.com/?These-Decisions-Can-Increase-Your-Happiness&id=10303843

Are Meditation and Mindfulness Dangerous?

When I began meditating in 1984, most people I talked to about it would stare at me blankly, then quickly change the subject or shake their head and walk away. These days, discussions of meditation and mindfulness appear everywhere from business and medical journals, to addiction and trauma recovery groups, to education conferences. In this article, you'll learn why so many are turning to these techniques and how to avoid common misconceptions, dangers, and potential pitfalls.

By recent reports, you might think meditation and mindfulness are a "panacea" (cure all) for everything that ails you. Programs are sprouting up in hospitals for pain management, in prisons for inmate reform, and in military, police, and emergency response settings to help handle intense situations and recover from PTSD.

These techniques are used as a support in psychotherapy-for addiction and trauma recovery, defusing self-sabotage, increasing self-awareness, and taming self-criticism. They are increasingly sought after for dealing with the stress of living in our fast-paced, threat-sensitive world. To feed this demand, countless apps promise to bestow the benefits of these practices at the push of a button.

Yet, with the rise in popularity of mindfulness and meditation, I've begun to see some contrarian headlines, such as "New Study Shows Meditation Doesn't Make You Happier, More Creative," "Meditation Not a Panacea," or "Christians Should Be Wary of Meditation."

As a meditation teacher, I hear beginning students say things like:

• "Meditation was supposed to be relaxing-but it made me irritated."

• "Meditation was supposed to feel good, but it made me more stressed out."

• "I thought meditation would help me sleep, but it gave me nightmares."

• "I thought meditation was supposed to help me accept myself, but it made me more self-critical."

• "I am more aware of my impulsiveness than ever. How is this helping me?"

What's going on here?

(Hint: Meditation doesn't "make these things happen." It reveals them. Meditation and mindfulness make you more aware of what's happening in your subconscious mind.)

Let's demystify meditation and mindfulness by defining them clearly, so you can assess their function and effectiveness, understand misconceptions, and avoid dangers and potential pitfalls.

Meditation and Mindfulness Defined

By meditation I mean, "Mindfully focusing your attention on a specific focal object for a period of time." It's about training your mind to consciously focus your attention. It's that straightforward.

A focal object in meditation can be the sensations of breathing, a mantra or focusing phrase, the stream of your thoughts and feelings, the presence of God, a blank wall, or a candle flame. Focusing on chosen focal objects develops your ability to pay attention, be present, and fully engage with what you are doing.

"Mindfully" in the definition means that you exercise "mindfulness" during meditation. Mindfulness means, "paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, without judgment." In other words, you adopt the attitude of a curious observer, just noticing what is happening without judging it as "good or bad." A non-judgmental attitude enables you to see more clearly, instead of reacting from fear, bias, or prejudice-which distort insight.

To sum up, "meditation" is an attention-training technique and "mindfulness" is an effective attitude for practicing this technique. You could also say that meditation is an opportunity to practice mindfulness. Together, meditation and mindfulness give you a deeper understanding of how your mind works.

Here's how it goes in practice:

As you meditate on a specific focal object, you notice moments when your mind wanders off to other things-such as an argument you had yesterday, a childhood memory, a presentation you have later today, or what you might have for lunch. Mindfulness enables you to recognize when and where your mind wanders, accept this as something a busy mind does, and gently return your attention to your chosen focal object.

During meditation, you will have a whole host of different thoughts and feelings. Some may feel good: some may scare you. Mindfulness treats them all the same-as passing bits of information. Using mindfulness, you come to realize that all thoughts and feelings come and go. They offer information, but they are no more substantial than that. They are nothing to be afraid of when you approach them mindfully. This insight can free you from anxiety about what is going on inside you.

The 3Rs of Meditation

I call the process of managing your mind during meditation the 3Rs: Recognize, Release, and Return. You recognize when you have wandered from your point of focus, release paying attention to that "distraction," and return to your chosen object of attention. It's that simple.

However, like any learned skill, it can be challenging at first. You may find your mind wanders most of the time. You may find yourself caught up in negative thoughts and feelings. You may find yourself irritated, self-critical, bored, or wondering if you're doing it right-or if you're doing anything at all!

That's OK. Recognizing all of this is part of meditation. Meditation increases awareness. You do this by mindfully focusing your attention, recognizing and accepting what your mind does, releasing distractions, and returning to your chosen focus-again and again and again.

As you repeat this process, you develop a sense of ease with managing your thoughts and feelings and a freedom to choose what you focus on and what you release. By practicing mindfulness during meditation, you grow your ability to relate to all kinds of moments in your life with greater freedom and ease.

Further Benefits of Practice

As you meditate for a period of time (say 10-20 minutes) consistently, your mind quiets down, your emotions calm, and your body relaxes. You de-pressurize, let go of over-thinking, and release built-up stress. As you release stress, energy is freed up that your body and mind use to recover, repair, integrate, and heal.

You start to feel like yourself again. You realize that "who you are" is much more than "the chatter" in your mind or the emotions that can "take you over." You are a deeper witnessing presence who "has" thoughts, feelings, and experiences, but is not defined by them. This can be a life-altering discovery!

These benefits don't happen because you are trying to clear your mind, they happen as a result of practicing the 3Rs. As you practice consistently, you develop the skills of recognizing where your mind is focused, releasing what is not serving you or others, and returning to what matters most.

These are invaluable skills that serve you in anything you want to do, overcome, or accomplish. I would go so far as to say they are fundamental skills you need to live your life well. Why, then, weren't you taught these essential skills in school when you were young? Regardless of the reasons, at any age, you can learn them with a few simple instructions, insight into how they work, and consistent practice.

Personally, I like to practice first thing in the morning. For much of my life, I woke up feeling anxious about what I had to do in the day ahead. Yet, now, no matter how I feel when I wake up, I feel relaxed and centered after my morning practice. I have a calm reference point I can return to when I get irritated or stressed out, caught up in negativity, or feel overwhelmed by what's happening in the world around me.

Why Meditation and Mindfulness Are Especially Important These Days

Today there are infinite demands on our time, energy, and attention-and they call to us 24/7-making us feel as if we always need to be doing something productive. We feel compelled to respond instantly on social media and gather a steady stream of tantalizing bits of information to keep us informed and amused. Even entertainment becomes a "must-do" as we feel compelled to binge-watch to get "caught up" on as much enjoyment as possible in our "free-time."

Yet always being "on the go" is not healthy.

Our bodies and brains are not made to run in constant overdrive. We are designed to engage in activity, then to rest and recover from what we've done. In our downtime, our body repairs itself, integrates all that we've experienced, and heals cellular damage we've sustained.

If we don't honor this balance, our systems go haywire. We get exhausted, hold increasing levels of tension in our bodies, and become persistently anxious or depressed. In this "overcooked" state, we invite the host of chronic illnesses like cancer, heart disease, and auto-immune disorders that are epidemic.

Meditation is a structured time-out from all this activity, so you can focus inwardly, rest, and recover. At first, it may feel like "doing nothing," but, as we've seen, the process is a gentle, yet active, training of your mind. It allows you to step back from the frantic pace of life, consciously unwind, and observe what's going on inside.

Meditation and mindfulness reveal your inner workings. They uncover the subconscious biases that lead to arguments, poor judgment, and bad decisions. They shine a light on habits that drive unwanted results in your life. They help you more objectively observe what you are doing, so you can consciously choose healthy habits and let go of unhealthy ones.

Maybe most importantly for us in this hyper-driven consumer culture, they encourage us to slow down, take a deep breath, and pay attention to the relationships, gifts, and opportunities we already have, rather than always trying to be, have, and do more.

Conclusion: Are Meditation and Mindfulness Dangerous?

Are meditation and mindfulness dangerous? Yes. They threaten to make you more conscious and intentional. They are dangerous to your negative thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and beliefs. They release the stifling grip of fear, bias, and prejudice. They shine a light on what needs to change.

By practicing mindfulness in meditation, you learn to evaluate all sides of any situation more objectively, so you can make better decisions. You recognize what no longer serves you and others, so you can shift your time, energy, and attention to what does. And, you become more present, focused, and fully engaged in your experiences, so you live a richer, more purposeful life.

So, let me ask you, "Do you have a regular Meditation/Mindfulness practice?" If so, please share what works well for you.

If you appreciate this article, please Share with your family, friends, and co-workers using the social media buttons.

Enjoy your practice!

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Learn From Your Successes to Build Self-Esteem

Self-awareness is the foundation of success in life. Learning from successes can boost your self-esteem and self-awareness because you can learn more about yourself and your strengths. Too often we get lost in the hyper-speed of today's society and the challenges that confront us at work and home to really remember that we have had successes in the past.

Everyone excels in at least one area (generally more than one area). When you understand self-awareness, this can help you to learn where your best skills lie and to do more activities that enable you to leverage these advanced skills more often.

Whenever you do something well, you feel a sense of accomplishment. Pride, and confidence surge in you because you could achieve something that ideally helped yourself and others. In many cases, you were the best person for the task and were more easily able to achieve it than other people would have. Therefore, other people will look up to you because you were able to complete the task and/or achieve the feat so quickly and easily as compared to others.

When you are having a difficult time or struggling with challenges, it is important to look back upon your successes and realize that you have the capability of doing great things and succeeding at whatever you are doing. Sometimes, life "throws us a curveball" that makes us uncomfortable and causes us to struggle a bit with tasks that we are not used to completing and have a hard time completing at a high level.

The key is that we must remember that especially during these difficult times, we have the capability to adapt and succeed. Build a library of those times when you've had successes, especially those tasks that others struggled and they called upon you to do them.

You can do this via journaling or some other method of documenting the successes because our memories can falter or be distorted after a period. Pay attention to the details so when the time comes you can assign credit where it is due. In my opinion, every success I have will be associated with another person or group who helped in the execution. This helps you build them up also.

Whether it was an issue with a computer or electronic device, an item at home that needed repairing, or just offering helpful advice to someone dealing with a situation you dealt with before, you could succeed where others couldn't or would have a harder time succeeding.

Reflecting on your past successes and realizing you have the capability to adapt and do many tasks well, you will realize that whatever present challenge you're facing can be overcome as well.

Reflecting and celebrating past successes is a great foundation for expanding your self-awareness and self-esteem but don't fall into the trap of spending your time focusing on the past. It is meant to be an inspiration not a crutch.

To be more successful, just focus on the task at hand, utilize the lessons you've learned from having past successes, and put the skills and effort in to overcome the present challenge.

By taking time to reflect and learn from your past successes, you can keep your self-esteem intact during times of great difficulty and be able to overcome virtually any challenge that comes your way.

Be mindful and intentional in all that you do today and tomorrow will be rich and rewarding.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Learn-From-Your-Successes-to-Build-Self-Esteem&id=9788124

Sacred Body Oracle: Energy Tributaries

READING: Nourishment and communication move through your many body systems. Like tributaries off a primary river, these channels carry vital energy and life forces to and from your spinal column into your brain, organs and limbs. Release stagnancy; purify and nourish your body, your emotions, and clarify your spiritual experience with simple focused breathing.

You can practice gentle breathing for many purposes and benefits: relaxation, health, self-awareness, and even deep meditation. Your breath is an expression of your life force. You can purposely move this beautiful biological, yet subtle energy with conscious and connected breathing.

PRACTICE: Find a comfortable position. You may lie on your back in an open posture, or sit upright in a chair with your feet on the floor. Relax and close your eyes and begin to breathe naturally and gently, following your breath into your body. Where does it go? What part of your body feels the energy as it moves in and out? Breathe for a while and just notice.

Be kind to your body, always breathe slowly and gently--no force.

Now try breathing into your lower belly. Place your hands on your belly, feeling it rise and fall, expanding as you inhale and relaxing as you exhale. Breathe like this for a while, becoming aware of how you feel as your lower belly receives the energy. Relax your neck and shoulders, your forehead and your eyes. Relax your chest; feel your breath and your belly.

Next, breathe gently into your chest. Feel your chest rise and fall with the breath. How do you feel as your breath moves through your chest? Fill your whole ribcage as the breath expands into your upper back and the sides of your ribs. Breathe deeply into your chest several times. How do you feel?

Now try inhaling into your chest and belly simultaneously, expanding your whole torso as you breathe in and out. Breathe out and down into your arms and legs. Imagine you are releasing old, stagnant energies through your fingertips and toes.

Breathe out and down your spine toward your tailbone; breathe in and up toward your head. Feel the river of breath in your spinal column. Feel its energy moving out from your spine through the many energy tributaries.Feel the energy of your breath moving like soft and quiet streams through every cell of your body. Inhale and exhale softly for a bit and just notice.

DAILY OBSERVATION: Be aware of your breath as you move through your day. Pay attention to where it goes as you inhale; how relaxed you feel as you exhale. Bring your attention back to yourself, stopping now and then to simply and slowly breathe--in and out--feeling your body.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Sacred-Body-Oracle:-Energy-Tributaries&id=10158465

What Matters When Your Opinion Doesn't Matter

I had a clash with a guy. He took a property of mine and I calmly told him to return it. I was surprisingly calm. The guy flared up, and started saying all sorts of stuff. I was barely listening but I heard clearly, "Does this guy think I am a small boy?" I left him immediately and never talked about the stuff afterwards.

There was a day I was scrolling through my chat list on a social network and saw a message I hadn't replied in a long time. Out of surprise of having not replied in such a long period of time, I sent, "WTF?" because I was surprised I hadn't replied. The young lady replied immediately, "What? Is it because my hair looks untidy in my profile picture? Or what?" I just closed the chat without replying her message.

I decided not to respond to both parties because of a similar reason, a similar problem. Both individuals lack self-confidence.

Self-confidence is simply a trust in oneself. This is broken into different instances. There's the case of self-assertiveness, self-absorption, self-awareness, self-consciousness, self-containment, self-contentment, self-denial, and a whole nest of them. They all amount to one thing, PRIDE.

Over the years, I have done a lot of self-analysis. I know myself; my strength and weaknesses. Even when you have the zenith amount of self-control, slip-ups are meant to happen. When the slip-up happens, the response from the concerned personality would add to, or decrease from their confidence in self. The essence of self-confidence cannot be overemphasized. There's a wide margin between boldness and self-confidence. Self-confidence does not necessarily mean I can talk in the same gathering as five thousand other persons.

Lack of Self-confidence implies that a person does not have trust in self, which leads the individual to seek answers from those around. A lack of trust creates unanswered questions, it moulds fear in the person till the person is forced to go elsewhere to dig out answers and soothe the pain the fear creates. I left the two persons I talked about in my illustrations because I didn't want to add to their problems. They were speaking their fears through me and I was in no mood to fill the void created by the lack of confidence.

A friend 'told' me, "Who do you think you are? What have you achieved?" I just smiled and he probably felt stupid. I had a conversation with someone recently and she declined being associated with her mates, whom she felt inferior to. I sought for the reason and she said she would join the association once she got admission into a university. I told her that her current state meant nothing. I went on to tell her that if she lacked confidence then, getting admission wouldn't give her the confidence. Self-confidence isn't a belief in the Material, it is a resolution; a belief that stems from the belief in the immaterial grown in oneself.

Personally, my philosophy is simple. If my esteem is called into question, then there is no deal between us. A dent in one's self confidence can lead to a million falls. It's like a network with a million wings. It dampens morale, it discourages, it leads astray, it diminishes value, and it kills!

Roughly 25% of the people I have met have been prejudicial against me, but over time I have been able to win over about 20% of them. My actions have won them over, they respect me, and the other 5% have their personal issues, everything I say is wrong to them. The point is that even when people stereotype, when they get scared of your great knowledge and strong personality, and fight you, you have to keep strong, and discard all the negative energy.

You are a special package, no one equals your potential. You have billions of cells who have no other duty but to serve you. A whole you shouldn't be ridiculed and dismissed as worthless.

Someone once told me, "Your opinion doesn't matter to the world". I just smiled, and said to myself, "it matters to me." My opinion on the music, hairstyle, celebrities, philosophy of life and every other aspect of your life is what matters. You are the king of your world, and every time you feel intimidated, remember you are a king in your own right. The best anyone should be able to do is advise you, try to influence you.

If I get the privilege, I will write more on this later. I hope the little I have written for now would stop you from being harassed, insulted, and ordered around aimlessly, and kill any doubts that may be/have arising/arisen in you! You are better than you were yesterday!

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The Intuitive Mind Is a Sacred Gift and the Rational Mind Is a Faithful Servant - Albert Einstein

So the rational mind is the dominant in a person, but what happens if the intuitive mind becomes dominant?

Let me tell you about an experiment, where a man did exactly that.

Firstly, how the heck you differentiate between the two. What comes from the intuition is more in the form of feeling and that feeling is pure, there is no clutter in it. It is like a state of balance, which is energising. It is free, connecting, expanding, and integrating in its nature. You do not think about it, you feel it. The rational mind creates thoughts, which in themselves have no emotional richness. They are more still, stable, even. They are bringing meaning, sense, connecting the elements, holding the picture together.

Anyway, the subject started the experiment from the beginning of September 2009. What he did, was letting the intuitive mind lead the way, and the rational mind just translating that in actions in the present, which is opposite of the usual relationship where the rational mind is trying very hard to figure out how things are going to happen.

In this experiment the logical (rational) mind's role was not to figure out what will happen, but how to make things happen now. It is important to say that on conscious level the person had no idea, what will happen in the future. As the intuition was telling him what to do in the moment, but not communicating why and how this exactly relates to the future. Sometimes it was giving the subject a hint but more a temporary direction, rather than anything solid related to the future.

What happened?

The subject at the time was in his third year at university and had started working part-time since the summer after his second year. The person reduced the amount of studying in hours approximately 3 times compared to the past year. In year two the subject achieved 66.78% on average compared to year three where the GA was 72.96%.

The subject spent approximately a month where he was not using a watch to coordinate his schedule (no alarm in the morning, not looking at the clock to determine if he should go somewhere and etc.). In this time the subject needed to go to his part-time work, go to seminars and lectures in the university and etc. The person was working a job, which was shift based and the shifts were on a random basis (including early mornings). He was following his intuition when to go, what to do. The result was that the person was occasionally late for some seminars, lectures and shifts, but usually small amount of time (10-15 minutes). He skipped some seminars or lectures, which didn't affect the individual negatively in any way. He was not fired from work or disciplined, he didn't fail the course, he didn't become a FAILURE. The subject had much more efficient way of living as he had more time for many things, lost less energy and there was increased synchronicity in his life. He reported multiplied excitement, passion, joy and that he felt that his life is much better organised compared to when the rational mind was leading.

It is important to mention that a key component for this experiment to be reproduced is the cognitive processing technique of the subject. This method is linked with self-awareness. Every time the subject experienced negative emotion (feeling of fear, anxiety, contraction, weakness) due to stimuli from the environment he was investigating his subconscious definitions. This process happens by analysing the situation in which the feeling occurred and what kinds of definitions are triggered by the stimuli and changing them with preferred definitions. For example the subject in the experiment had a coursework with a deadline in a month time. The rational mind if leading would have said: "please let's start now or in a week's time as we need to plan and we don't know how long it will take" and etc. The intuitive mind didn't say that at all. Actually in this case it mentioned the coursework 3 days before the deadline. But because there was the definition in the subject that good results are achieved by hard work, the closest the deadline, the more negative emotion the subject was experiencing as to the fact that he was not doing the coursework. So as he was feeling that negative emotion of anxiety, contraction and etc. described above he started investigating to find the definition. The person began first by asking himself when that negative emotion occurred, what it was connected to. In this example when he remembered about the coursework. In the majority of cases, it is not very straight forward process because the subject will go through number of definitions, which will not be the core definition. I will use analogy to give you better understanding. Imagine a problem. To solve a problem permanently you need to reach the root cause of the problem and to do that you will first go through multiple peripheral causes. Same with definitions! The way to know if you successfully have changed the core belief does not require any effort. If you have identified correctly and changed with preferred definition in the same situation, you will get a different result. You will not experience the negative emotion, but instead the intuitive feelings more clearly. Using that technique you will be able to recognise the intuition, which is a clear and pure feeling and you will know when there is just a small bit of mud in the water leading to the inability to drink it.

Important note: Definitions are subconscious. Every time you are executing this process you tap in the subconscious and bring out certain definitions, you investigate them, change them and then you put them back in the subconscious. When you re-experience the situation you must not think about the changed definition. It is already in the subconscious and it is automated process.

Would you experiment?

Please feel free to comment and share your thoughts. Thanks for reading.

https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Intuitive-Mind-Is-a-Sacred-Gift-and-the-Rational-Mind-Is-a-Faithful-Servant---Albert-Einstein&id=9565615

The Mental Growth Spurt

I've noticed a theme in the last few months. Nothing fits.

I'm talking: clothes, shoes, positions, ideas, reactions, beliefs, relationships and more, have become ill-fitting.

Have you ever felt this way? Like you've outgrown many things in your Life?

Since you've begun your journey to Wholeness and Self-Awareness, you may notice that your newly unclouded mind is not so easily accepting things that no longer serve you.

• What you once believed in with all your might, you've begun to question.
• The people you had a great time with, are no longer in alignment with your needs.
• The job you once hoped you'd get, has become a main source of stress.
• And that relationship you thought you'd die without, no longer keeps your interest.

If any of those things seem close to the truth for you, YOU ARE OUTGROWING THIS STAGE OF LIFE. Trying to keep things as they are now is like putting on your once roomy jeans that now fit more like leggings and laying on the bed sucking in your stomach for dear life to force the button through the hole. Sure, you've got them on and probably look amazing on the outside. But inside, you're cutting off your circulation praying for the end of the day where you can finally get out of them and feel your legs again.

A few things to consider:

• Don't force things to fit into your life when all signs point to - You've outgrown it.
• As inconvenient as it may seem to find new jeans to fit in, more positive people to be around, new positions to search for, and getting to know the new you - it's worth it.
• You've been asking for change, and so it is. A part of that desire being fulfilled and those prayers being answered, is that you now allow the change to happen.
• There's a huge requirement to Let Go, just as the trees in Autumn are unafraid when their leaves begin to fall. You too can trust that things you needed before, are no longer necessary for what you will do and be in this next season.

Prepare for the stretch of your wings that free you from the confines of your once needed cocoon. Appreciate what has been and what has served you well in past. Release yourself from people and situations that are no longer contributing to your growth. Trust that you will have everything you need and more in this new season.

Be grateful for the things you've outgrown because they are indicators of how much you are growing.

https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Mental-Growth-Spurt&id=9993566

Is Your Life Complete? Have You Regrets? Are There Still Things in Life You'd Like to Accomplish?

A new study just published, led by scientists from Imperial College London in collaboration with the World Health Organization, states that average life expectancy is set to increase in many countries by 2030 - and will exceed 90 years in South Korea.

Many countries - including Japan as well as many European countries - struggle with issues related to life-expectancy and the increasing number of the elderly.

Both the elderly as well as the societal-political elements of each country deal with health and financial concerns. At the same time, a serious question to be dealt with is: how can each one of us maintain our own quality of life throughout the years.

Numerous articles have recently been published about euthanasia - about taking one's own life. Not only the very old contemplate it, but also the not-so-old who feel their life is "complete", or who wonder "what sense does it make to keep on living?" or believe that they can't change things in their life and (therefore) there is no reason to keep living.

But is it possible for them to understand that they can still continue living with the feeling that their life is worthwhile, that they are doing their best to live life to the fullest, and even - and this is the hard question - that no matter how "old" or "young" they are they can still embark on a quality of life they might not have the knowledge and/or the courage to embark on previously?

It is never too late to reflect and contemplate your life experiences, failures and accomplishments, and do the best you can to live your life to the fullest.

Regardless of whether you are "young" or "old" - which is often a matter not only of chronological age but also of inner feeling! - you can (and should) continue to actualize yourself as much as you can for as long as you can.

What does "actualize" yourself mean?

The "secret" to fulfil yourself throughout your life is to understand and realize how to live your life to its fullest; how to be aware of the ways in which you might have sabotaged yourself; and to learn how you can still, regardless of your age, learn from past mistakes, become aware of what you would still wish to experience. Whether it is intimacy, travels, writing, companionships, and more, the main issue is how to live to the fullest and accomplish what you desire.

One of the best means to actualize yourself and live to the fullest is by developing Self-Awareness: realizing how you might have previously shot yourself in the foot, and acknowledge the changes you need to make in order to stay away from your past mistakes, and direct your attention to the here and now, hoping for a good living for as long as you can.

What does "becoming aware" entail?

It is quite likely that throughout your life you have never taken the time to really look inward; understand what might have stood in your way from achieving whatever you might have desired, be it a successful intimate relationship, be it writing a book, be it developing a meaningful friendship, and so on.

It might well be that - as an example - you have had a satisfying relationship in the past, but for the last several years, since your separation, or having your spouse passed away, you were not successful - for some reason unknown to you - in finding and developing another intimate relationship with which you would have been satisfied. Maybe you have dated many others but with no success; maybe you didn't date because you weren't sure of yourself; or maybe you did date but "somehow" never found another person to whom you felt close enough.

Becoming self-aware means: Becoming aware of what this "maybe" might mean; realizing what you might have done or thought that didn't land you the relationship you desired.

Becoming self-aware means: taking responsibility for your attitudes and behaviors; understanding how you might have sabotaged yourself and your potential relationships; realizing how you might have used one thousand and one excuses to justify your failure in pursuing a truly new intimacy.

Regardless of your age and past experiences, it is never too late to develop Self-Awareness and learn how to improve and enhance your quality of life and relationships. And the sooner you begin with the process of awareness the better it is for your well-being.

ezinearticles.com/?Is-Your-Life-Complete?-Have-You-Regrets?-Are-There-Still-Things-in-Life-Youd-Like-to-Accomplish?&id=9651456

Rationalizing Anger and the Question That Defuses It

STRESS evokes anger when hope is lost in the moment. It is not usually one issue in isolation that turns us inside out in anger.

Most anger I suggest is a chaotic accumulation of issues, not one single issue that sends us over the edge into the abyss of ludicrousness. The issue that apparently breaches the cusp is the straw that breaks the proverbial camel's back - the dromedary is already maximally burdened.

Angry outbursts must be about a profusion of issues conspiring against our peace.

We would be better to stop and ask the simple question, "What could this be?"

Is it that we are upset with our partner or our co-worker or our boss or our child or our mother or father? Or, is it that we're frustrated because of the traffic, or being let down by others, or that we are tired, or disappointed that our favourite team lost? Could it be the weight of a conflict that can't be reconciled, or perhaps there is a different weight we're carrying, like a grief or a haunting disappointment? Maybe we are anxious or nervous for something ahead. Or, is it a combination of these? The latter is likelier, an amalgamation of concerns is bothering us.

The question is, could it be something else? Just the fact that that is a possibility makes the question pressing. Why would we upset someone else if we weren't sure they were completely to blame? Yet, we upset others without even knowing what it is at core that is perplexing us. Could it be something else? Of course, it could be.

Simply to stop, to pause, and to think, "What could this be?" is empowering and protective. "What could be behind what I'm feeling here?" In these moments we realize the power of self-awareness.

It's wise when anger rises to take a step back. The time we take to explore honestly and humbly what's driving our anger is the time we can take to seize control of our emotions to protect ourselves and everyone else.

The most empowering thing we can do with our anger is to ask why. It always hides sadness or fear, fatigue or frustration. The soul seeks to be heard, and if we won't pay attention to what our soul is saying, our soul will let everyone else know. And great harm can be done.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Rationalizing-Anger-and-the-Question-That-Defuses-It&id=9850174

Want to Light Up a Room?

Looking for the latest luminous make-up to brighten your complexion and cover up your flaws?

Need to know the current fashion trends for heading out to the meet-ups?

We love all those gorgeous websites on fashion and beauty, but right now we're going to talk about another way to light up a room. Here is a great quote to show our point:

"Beauty is a kind of radiance. People who possess a true inner beauty, their eyes are a little brighter, their skin a little more dewy. They vibrate at a different frequency."

Cameron Diaz

Want to know the secret to true inner beauty? It starts with self-awareness. It's finding out your true self - what makes you tick, what you love, what you don't love, what you're good at, what you're not so good at, your dreams, desires, habits, etc. It helps you 'rock' what makes you happy and go for what you're passionate about. And experts like Daniel Goldman, author of the best-selling books on Emotional Intelligence, say it's a foundation of success.

Anyone can easily answer questions about their likes and dislikes. "I love ice cream, movies, long walks, etc." But real self-awareness goes deeper - it's answering questions we only ask ourselves. It's not something you do once at a motivational class and then forget about. It's an ongoing practice of being quiet enough to let the answers come to you from inside. Sometimes just being alone without computers, TVs, and phones is really useful and often rare. Some ways of achieving this quietness are with practices like walking, exercise, yoga, and meditation.

There are plenty of meditations online specifically for self-awareness - just Google or YouTube the phrase. The meditation doesn't have to only be geared towards awareness though, since all meditations quiet the mind. Trying out different examples not only gives you variety, it also helps you explore the types that resonate with you - more awareness. My favorite is 'Meditate and Relax with Bob Proctor'. Here is the link:

http://www.proctorgallagherinstitute.com/tips-and-tools/meditation

This is an excerpt from that meditation, "With your inner eye, you now see a beautiful white light of energy flowing in through the crown of your head. And this beautiful white light is permeating, penetrating and filling every cell of your being... "

If this sounds too 'out there' for you, then head over to YouTube.com and watch Bob Proctor's "You Were Born Rich" audio series from years ago. He is known as America's Greatest Prosperity Teacher and has taught millions of people his wisdom for success. In that video series, he explains the science behind everything he teaches about how a person's mind works. He is as 'real' and knowledgeable as anyone you will ever find on the subject.

And last but not least, another great practice for awareness is journaling. It's basically keeping a diary of your thoughts. If you already journal at night, you can add theses simple questions to your routine. If journaling is not for you, these questions can be answered in your head before falling off to sleep. They can take as little as five minutes.

Remember the events of the day.

Think of what you are grateful for from the day. Since gratitude is becoming such a prevalent practice nowadays, this might be something you already do every night.

What two instances from the day are you proud of? Answers could be things like: I rocked that project at work; I took the stairs instead of the elevator; I was kind to that stranger in line.

What two instances from the day would you have done differently? An example might be that during a disagreement with a family member, you wished you hadn't blurted out the hurtful words. What would you have done different in that moment? Spend a few seconds playing a new scene out in your mind. Note that when you play this new scene, the other person doesn't change - only you do.

Don't let the simplicity of these questions make you think they are not effective. Once this becomes a regular nightly routine, you might not even notice right away, but you'll be growing your self-awareness - an invaluable skill for achieving your goals!

"You have to find what sparks a light in you so that you in your own way can illuminate the world."

Oprah Winfrey

http://ezinearticles.com/?Want-to-Light-Up-a-Room?&id=9641475

Learn How To Tap Into The Power Of Your Unconscious Mind And Bring Success To You

Deep down in an endless arena of your mind rest your mind power secrets, in the unconscious mind which houses your illusory ego. This ego isn't real, but it thinks it is and believes it is connected to your identification.

The ego has projected as a body, called human.

In other words, your ego identity is a part of your whole-mind that projects and dreams images of what it thinks is the real world, and believes is you.

Each part compares eventually in order to create your character. In this area that dreams of illusion, you are comatose, unaware, but you have automated actions that happen.

Keep reading to understand the habits of successful people who have ever walked this earth have learned mind power secrets, by how to be in control of the ego rather than the ego controlling them

Sometimes, you are out cold since the unconscious mind conceals many elements that trigger such cataleptics.

An example of the unconscious mind's activities however is kept in mind by the projections which are often assumptions.

This is why the Course in Miracles states, "You, my child, are afraid of your brothers and of your Father and of yourself. You are merely deceived in them."

What happened is your unconscious mind sent a signal that channeled to the subliminal mind. The two of these fellers got together for a moment and conjured up an insensible idea into your mind.

How do I understand when the unconscious mind is interacting?

You establish self-awareness of mind power secrets with a continuing greater sense of awareness.

We have automatic reactions coming from the unconscious mind, which instinctively triggers involuntary motion, thoughts and actions. Reflex response causes us unwittingly to react to these signals.

How do I manage these automatic actions?

You do not essentially control these actions, unless the signals are sending negative messages. Due to the fact that we are affected by directions and impacts, to discover these mind power secrets we need to learn to acknowledge why we feel specific ways or do certain things.

Should stay awake at all times to uncover mind power secrets?

No, not at all, part of realizing these mind power secrets is by understanding why your body, or, ego, needs its rest.

One of the best methods to acquaint you with mind power secrets is to use self-talk to let go of such ego antics.

The Course in Miracles teaches us to, "Ask what they are of the Teacher of Reality, and hearing His answer, you too will laugh at your fears and replace them with peace."

If we acknowledge this ego identity, it assists us to form a better viewpoint, which builds self-confidence, self-regard and a much better picture of self. It is the procedure of social and character advancement that is brought forth by mind power secrets.

You would see that the brain has a nurturing side if you comprehend the mind. This side of the brain rests in the unconscious mind, which permits us to pamper self.

Down in the depths of your eternal mind is the unconscious mind where your mind power secrets wait for you, which houses the ego that thinks it can control you.

You must turn the light on of your real Self and order the ego to follow your instructions.

The mind rests above the unconscious mind. The structure of the unconscious mind you will discover natural mind power secrets to progress through social and personality development if you follow.

How so, well, by comprehending your body actions, you can bring the mind and body into harmony. Understand nevertheless, that the body just does exactly what the mind states, so this is why it is essential that we develop self-control.

To the mind power secrets waiting for you!

http://ezinearticles.com/?Learn-How-To-Tap-Into-The-Power-Of-Your-Unconscious-Mind-And-Bring-Success-To-You&id=9806154

Turning Fears Into Action Items

We all have fears and issues around certain struggles that life has to offer us from time to time: some of us are fearful about death, finances, careers, health, weight, happiness, partnerships, business, coping abilities, aging, relationships with families or friends. These struggles can change with age and stages in our life. What was important when we're twenty is not so important when we are sixty or seventy.

Recently one person mentioned the fear of being a sales person and how to create her own business and find her own clients. This is a struggle for many people, especially for people in the natural health-related fields who find it a challenge to emphasize their talents and their fees. Why? Because we want to take care of people; we don't want them to feel we are putting pressure on them to spend their money. But, aren't we doing just that? If we want to share our services with others, we have to think of the sharing as an exchange. I give you this and you give me that. Both parties must feel that the exchange is of equal value. So as natural healing artists, we must address our fears about selling our services to others. Whenever we address our fears, try to think of yourself from a wholistic framework which can help you coach yourself to learning how to turn your fears into action items.

WHOLISTIC FRAMEWORK 

I spell holistic with a 'w' because, for me, wholistic means whole. We are all whole and we all have the tools we need within ourselves to maintain a healthy, happy, and productive life; but sometimes inner thoughts and fears or outward pressures from the world and others create blockages that stop us from having the life we truly desire. That is what natural healing is all about - finding nature's way to ensure we stay balanced in our lives. Let's elaborate on the word 'wholistic'.

Wholistic can mean the linking or combination of the body, mind and spirit. Drawn from the principles of the Ayurvedic system, referred to as the system of life, we draw on the elements of Air, Fire, Water, and Earth as the underlying basis of the structure of the universe which is also the same basis within the human structure. We are all made up of air, fire, water, and earth and we use these basic elements as expressions or preferences that help us increase self-awareness of our gifts, strengths, and also of our blindspots - those parts of ourselves that we do not like to visit or that feel boring to us.

This increased self awareness along with the increased developmental use of all the elements within us consists of the Air or Mental side of ourselves which relates to how we think and dream - our ideas about life. The Fire & Water relate to the Social side of ourselves and how we relate to others through communicating, coordinating, cooperating, and connecting. The Earth or Physical side represents how we build a world that is solid and which manifests the ideas of the thinker or Dreamer through the processes of the two Social expressions of Fire or the Actions we take and Water or our Reactions to the process as we move through it.

OUR PREFERRED ELEMENT 

This whole-person system is driven by the captain of our ship which is referred to as our natural, most preferred element or way of operating. When we allow the captain of our ship to guide us, it helps in its process to yoke all four elements into the maturation of our higher or spiritual self. This higher self is expressed in life by how we take our strengths out into the world to share with others; the ultimate goal of a spiritual life on planet earth is to self-actualize or to bring into actuality our gifts which are tempered by life itself - not in the world of the imagination - but in the world of reality -- through a complete process of manifestation developing and using all the tools within us that nature provides.

REFRAMING FEARS 

The fear of sales, in some sense, can be reframed and doesn't have to feel like 'sales' but sales can be thought of as a context for sharing who we are with others. The process for insights into this struggle is not about getting you to 'sell' yourself but the process is about assisting you in sharing (hence getting sales) your highest, most actualized self with others even when you have or in spite of having these fears and blocks. The fears and blocks are the actual stepping stones for closing the gap between where you are and where you want to be - sharing (selling) your services to others.

COACHING TO INCREASED CONSCIOUS AWARENESS 

No matter what you are afraid of and no matter what your blocks or stressors at the moment are, coaching to conscious awareness helps to bring and crystallize what is not working into what can be turned into an action plan. A good coach will help you create an action plan that is perfect for you and will then assist you in moving toward what you do want instead of what you fear or are striving to avoid.

COACHING TOOLS 

The fundamental tools applied in a coaching session are personality preferences, behavioural insights, addressing fears and blocks through questioning skills, getting clear on motivational drives, insights for dealing with conflict and confrontation, and the use of various processes to increase personal insights as you focus and move forward on what you want to achieve - hence 'coaching' skills for achieving your goals/targets/dreams.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Turning-Fears-Into-Action-Items&id=9849499

Building an Energising Personal Vision - See Your Dream Come True

Contrary to the enormous significance that was earlier attached to personal and organisational vision, creating a vision in today's context is considered more of a liability than a chance to chalk out the future path. Asking the employees to set up their images is now a standard practice among most Companies and is done to make sure that individual ideas align with the overall goals of the enterprise.

What is a personal vision?

Simply defined, a personal view is your idea of success in the future. As easy as it may sound, setting up a personal opinion, especially for the leaders, isn't a walk in the park. Personal vision is what inspires people to come to work every day. For leaders, it is a platform to introduce big ideas which would excite them as well as their team members. What separates great leaders from others; it is their ability to paint the future with precision. It requires some skills including articulation and self-awareness.

How executive coach can help you frame & achieve your vision

Leaders need to spend a considerable amount of time and effort to formulate their ideas. It is because it must include the welfare of their Company and employees since their success is interdependent. Most of the leaders end up applying a one-dimensional approach while formulating their visions. This result in the end view being short sighted and sometimes biased. Thus leaders need a confidant who has been with them through their leadership journey and can point out the red flag when he sees one. An executive coach can come in handy in such situations. As a person who knows your strengths and weaknesses inside out and understands the way you work, an executive coach would be a right partner any leader needs while coming up with a personal vision.

The role of an executive coach does not end with the formulation of your vision. In fact, it just begins here. An executive coach is a partner in your journey towards the realisation of your vision. He can help you break it down into smaller units. It is important since an understanding of small targets would keep the executives invested in the bigger idea of achieving the vision they had set. There would always be some dull and dark moments between today and your vision. In those moments, it is the executive coach who would show you light on the path leading towards your vision.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Building-an-Energising-Personal-Vision---See-Your-Dream-Come-True&id=9724881

Do You Know Your Emotional Style?

Neuroscientist Richard Davidson spent almost 40 years studying the brain mechanisms that underlie our emotions. He determined that individuals have unique and consistent ways of responding to life experiences. These emotional styles are governed by specific identifiable brain circuits.

In his book, The Emotional Life of Your Brain, co-authored with Sharon Begley, he describes six emotional styles:

1. Self-Awareness: How well you perceive the physical sensations in your body that reflect your emotions. (Self-awareness is determined by the ability of the insula to interpret signals from the body and organs.)

2. Sensitivity to Context: How good you are at regulating your emotional responses depending on the context you're in. (This sensitivity is driven by activity levels in the hippocampus.)

3. Resilience: How slowly or quickly you recover from adversity. (Resilience is determined by signals between the prefrontal cortex and the amygdala.)

4. Social Intuition: How adept you are at picking up social signals from people around you. (Social intuition is shaped by the interplay between the amygdala and fusiform regions.)

5. Attention: How clear and sharp your focus is. (Attention is regulated by the prefrontal cortex.)

6. Outlook: How long you are able to sustain positive emotion. (Outlook is determined by the levels of activity in the ventral striatum, which is a part of the brain linked to our reward system).

I find it interesting that few of these six emotional styles directly correlate with the five basic components of emotional intelligence:

1. Self-Awareness: The ability to recognize and understand your own emotions, as well as the effect they have on others.

2. Self-Regulation: The ability to control and appropriately express emotions and impulses.

3. Social Skills: The ability to interact well with others.

4. Empathy: The ability to understand how others are feeling and respond accordingly

5. Internal Motivation: The ability to fulfill your own inner needs and goals.

Let's use ES to identify Emotional Style and EI to identify Emotional Intelligence.

There are two emotional styles that directly correspond to two components of emotional intelligence:

• Self-Awareness [ES] is clearly similar to Self-Awareness [EI].
• Sensitivity to Context [ES] seems to correspond to Self-Regulation [EI].

The remaining four emotional styles appear to have a less distinct relationship to the emotional intelligence components. You may disagree with some of my pairings. I'm not sure what this says about my personality, but I prefer for things to even out...

• It is possible that Resilience [ES] may relate in some way to Self-Regulation [EI].
• Social Intuition [ES] may correspond to Social Skills [EI]
• A case might be made that Social Intuition [ES] is related to Empathy [EI].
• A case might also be made that Attention [ES] is related in some part to Internal Motivation [EI].
• Finally, Outlook [ES] may relate to Internal Motivation [EI].

Despite this apparent lack of correspondence, both emotional styles and emotional intelligence do share one important quality. Neuroplasticity means that the brain (and thus, how you think, feel and respond) can be changed. Becoming more aware of your emotions is the first step in transforming them and your brain. Emotional styles can be modified and emotional intelligence skills can be learned and developed.

If you would like to get a sense of your emotional style, the Center for Healthy Minds offers a short questionnaire.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Do-You-Know-Your-Emotional-Style?&id=9839506

Postponing Procrastination

Procrastination: on goals, actions, to-do lists, ideas. The report that needs to be done, presentation to prepare, even fitness targets we want to achieve. They can start piling up and lead us to feel overwhelmed, which may make us procrastinate even more.

Have you been known to decide to start a task, only to immediately go and put the kettle on? Have you justified leaving a task because you need to be in the right mood, or have enough time to tackle it? Or completed easier, or fun tasks, over and above the ones you know you "should" be doing?

Wouldn't it be good if you could understand why you procrastinate and how you can get into the right state of mind when you need it, so that you can maintain your motivation, purpose and drive?

This is where an in-depth self-awareness is key. People often sabotage their own success through perfectionism, fear of failure or making mistakes, or simply not playing to their own strengths. Additionally, it could be due to:

• Negative self-talk can reduce self-esteem and confidence.
• Telling yourself you "should" do something, rather than "could", implies judgement rather than a sense of hopefulness
• Perfectionism can sometimes hide a fear of not doing something well/right or thoughts of never being allowed to make a mistake
• Cognitive bias such as Imposter Syndrome can make us worry that we'll be found out as frauds and that we don't deserve to be doing what we're doing.

We procrastinate often because there's a fear to our sense of worth, and our "reward" (or feel good) system is threatened. We like fun and stress-free today, not to feel all these concerns.

But this means we're not very good at looking out for our future self. I often ask clients, "what would your future-self say to you right now? Would they be asking you to get on with it, so that they don't have twice as much work or have a serious deadline to do it all in?"

Procrastination is making our future-self pay the price of us not doing something today. When we procrastinate, we are valuing the current moment more than what we're going to have to go through later. Sometimes all we need to do is think about how much more work our future-self will have to do, to get us to start now.

As well as asking ourselves these questions, we need to work out if we have any beliefs that are causing us to put off doing the important things, and therefore putting our future self under more pressure. Our brains don't like moving outside of our comfort zone, without a lot of confidence and determination, so we'll find ways of not having to go there. Our past can haunt our current thinking. But when we feel confident, we're happy to take action.

Consider the following:

• Work out what triggers you to put things off. What are you concerned about or avoiding? For example, failure, criticism, rejection?
• Do you need to improve your knowledge or skills?
• Get rid of external distractions - ensure a tidy work space, turn the phone off, close down social media, turn off the email notification ping!
• Prioritise your to-do list, thinking about what is really essential.
• Break down actions to small, achievable tasks.
• Also delegate or even delete things where you can.
• Focus your mind on getting started. You'll be surprised how much you can get done once you get started! It's the thought of it that can often put us off.
• Celebrate achievements and successes. When your mind can see results, overwhelm reduces.

Lastly, are there any habits that are contributing to not getting things done. For instance, coming home and switching the TV on, spending 2 hours checking emails in the morning, even finding housework that for some reason needs to be done right now! Not that these are from personal experience!!

Just consider all that you can achieve when you postpone your procrastination! Your future self will really appreciate it.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Postponing-Procrastination&id=9741036