The Inspiration of Certain Words and Their Life-Changing Capacities

Many people go through life unable to express their innermost feelings in words. On top of that, many people are shy and fearful, which causes them to be unable to express the right words at the right moments when they will mean the most.

Words are very powerful, especially when they are spoken at just the right moment. Many go through life totally oblivious to the fact that they could accomplish many of their goals just by using the right words. But the truth is all that's needed is to use them in the right way.

Consider this, words spoken in anger and carelessness can cause someone to be traumatized, which can permanently affect them for a lifetime. On the other hand, encouraging words and compliments given to someone can boost that person's confidence and give them the stamina to face life's difficulties for years to come.

Most assuredly, words can be very influential, and that's why you can use them to improve your own self-esteem as well as the overall quality of your life.

Boosting your self-confidence with words aren't those that come from other people. Write these words down and speak them to yourself. They are referred to as "affirmations." They are easy to create and simple to use, but they can be most effective in raising your self-confidence.

To start out with, zero in on the areas of your life that you're not quite satisfied with and you feel like they need to be improved. For example, if you're not happy with certain things about your looks, then focus on something that you ARE pleased with. Perhaps you feel like a bit of weight loss would help you, but you have a very attractive face. Focus on that fabulous smile.

Now, put yourself into a routine, every morning when you get up and every night when you go to bed, take time to look at yourself in the mirror and say something like, "I have a beautiful smile and this smile is what everyone is going to see when they look at me. My fabulous smile is going to attract the people I want in my life." Of course, making it more personal might help more.

Affirmations are essential to help you at remembering that there ARE some very appealing qualities about you and that they are the ones you need to draw attention to. When you're confident about something and can make use of that confidence, you'll find that people will suddenly WANT to be around you because you illuminate such great vibes. In other words, it will draw their focus away from the fact that you are carrying around a few extra pounds. People flock to those who flash a great smile and radiate an open-hearted personality.

There are great looking guys that have intimate relationships with women that are less than a desirable 10, but yet their lack of first-rate beauty hasn't stopped them. They've found a way to bring out their inner beauty. You can do the same. All you need to do is a little psychological reinforcing. Write down all the affirmations that relate to what you want to accomplish. Recite them as often as you need.

The more positive energy that you put out the more will return to you, before long that gorgeous smile will be the only thing you'll be aware of and those extra pounds will be in the back of your mind, where you can get to it later. This approach can work the same way with anything that you want to change about yourself.

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5 Steps to Shift a Negative Experience Into a Good One ( A Tale By a Former Fireman)

One time, in the rookie beginnings of my fire career, I almost took what a patient said to me personally. Almost.

I can picture her clear as day, even now, sitting in the well-worn booth of the restaurant, with a couple of her friends. The overwhelming smell of cheap perfume, greasy food, and hairspray floated over the table to me, as I looked at our possible patient, a heavily made- up woman who was dressed in loud, gaudy colors that matched her fiery expression.

Restaurant management had called 911 because the woman was causing a disturbance and refusing to quiet down. Her friends, angry at the restaurant manager, were not much help, but finally conceded that their friend was more agitated than normal. PD was standing by, ready to escort her out of the restaurant if she would not calm down.

As I was trying to talk to her, take her pulse and perform my initial medical assessment, she got up into my face. Who the hell did I think I was? What the hell did I think I was doing? And some other choice names flew my way.

Those fiery eyes, with her razor's edge breath on my face got to me and my rookie self. My indignation rose fast. I felt the words bubble up to the back of my throat and my tone about to turn sharp.

Just then, I was saved my by my paramedic partner's voice, "Blood sugar 45."

When you are a diabetic and going into insulin shock because your blood sugar level is 45, you usually aren't even conscious! If you haven't become unconscious yet, you do not feel good. And you are, most often, not nice.

It's not personal.

I swallowed my unspoken words and winced at their sour taste, and I never forgot the guilty bellyache I got after that.

We Can Never Know Anyone Else's Story

I have tried to translate that important experience in all aspects of my life since then, and in many situations I try to remember, "It's not personal." Granted it can be hard sometimes, especially when it seems personal--when someone cuts us off in traffic, or steals the parking spot right from under our nose, or aims unkind words our way.

One of the key elements, for me, in remembering to not take things personally, is acknowledging that I can never really know anyone else's story. Where they come from, who they are, what they are going through, what their innermost feelings are, how they have been shaped by the people that surrounded them, or the events in life they have encountered. Not my best friend, not even my sister.

When I can acknowledge that I do not really know someone's story, I become much less judgmental of others and their actions. When I can acknowledge that I cannot completely know someone or what really hides behind their actions, people's offenses become a lot less personal.

Pause, Before Reacting

How can we practice not taking offenses personally? When someone "wrongs" us, we can pause. Count to ten if you want. Take a deep breath. Take ten deep breaths. Can you pull back and become the observer? Be patient with yourself. It may take some practice resetting the habit of initially reacting. You will be living in a very conscious manner when you start practicing pause.

Practice Empathy

In this pause, as we try to avoid instant reaction, we can take the opportunity to change our habit of personalizing things to the next level. Perhaps we can practice a little empathy. We can start with the question, "I wonder why?" I have since learned from that emergency call many years ago, that on the medical emergency scene, this is a very wise question.

In fact, it is a wise question in any situation. I have found when we simply ask," I wonder why?" whether we condone certain behaviors or not, this question shifts the energy of judgment to the energy of empathy. Practicing a little bit of empathy as we observe the world is a good place to start. And then when someone affords us a bit of empathy when we've messed up, we realize how important that can be.

Turn Your Eye Inward

You will know you have become a master of not personalizing things when you begin to notice how your own reactions to someone else might really be about yourself.

When it is you who is angry at someone, feel your anger; and then when you are calm, ask yourself, "What is the feeling underlying my anger? Is it unworthiness? Is it fear? Can I possibly own it?"

Maybe you do not need to put it on someone else. When you have owned it, notice how your anger toward the other has diminished or even disappeared.

Move Ever Forward

Today I happily stood in the center of a world that is not my norm. Today I got to be yard duty person at my first grader's school. It was a colorful whirlwind of little people, in a world filled with laughter, screaming, running, jumping, and climbing. The thing that stood out to me as I observed this vibrant world is that, for all its apparent chaos, it flows. Things happen, accidents happen, heads get bumped, feelings get hurt, toes get stepped on. And then they move on. Quickly.

First graders are really good at not taking things personally, I surmised. They don't have time for that sort of thing. The present moment is always carrying them forward.

I watched as two little girls skipped off together, arm in arm, after weathering a brief storm in their friendship. I smiled to myself.

We could learn a lot from them.

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