Keep Moving Forward Anyway

There are times like now when I wonder how to respond. When there's no explanation for what has taken place. I'm left wondering, without answers, not even knowing the right questions to ask. Situations like these are littered throughout life.

At some point we must ask, 'What is the point?'

What is the point of despair? What is the point of it, Lord? To keep moving hopefully forward anyway. 'What point is there, son, to stay in the place of powerlessness or pity? I can do more in you as you bear your pain hopefully, choosing to trust I am still, and always, in control,' says my Lord, 'Keep moving forward, anyway.'

The pain won't kill you...

but it will help you to grow...

if you keep moving forward.

What about betrayal? 'Well,' says God, 'You've done it too, haven't you? Do you not all have the capacity to let people down?' Why, yes, Lord, is the sound of my response. I have certainly betrayed others. You mean they felt like I do now. It never felt nice. 'So,' says God, 'can you just keep moving forward anyway? I'll forgive your lapses into feeling hurt, as long as you'll endeavour to come back to the peace you can only get from me.' God, you're so good.

Disappointment and rejection, well they're just the pits. And yet, in this world there will be times we don't get our way, so many we should expect them to occur. Why are we so shocked? 'Son, why do you expect everything to work out well in this fallen world? Plan for the best, but expect the worst, and you'll be ready, come what may,' says God.

If disappointment can't knock you off course...

and rejection doesn't reset your identity...

you will recover, and you will endure.

What about these addictive traits of mine, Lord, will You ever heal them? 'Oh, my son, as you trust in feeling your pain, in the truth I've given you from eternity, you will overcome,' says God, 'and continue being honest, for in honesty is healing, and in healing is hope.'

'Do you get the idea yet, my son? Keep moving forward, and you'll get My work done.'

There is a purpose beyond the pain, a justice beyond the travesty, a love beyond the fear, and we will see all these and more, if we just keep moving forward.

This is all about taking the Lord's side and remembering that in taking our own side we choose wrong.

It seems counterintuitive to go against ourselves, but to bear the pain of reality whilst we keep moving forward is the greatest wisdom.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Keep-Moving-Forward-Anyway&id=9999696

I Love to Cry, What About You? (By Kathleen Dwyer-Blair )

When I say, I love to cry, I do not mean that I love to feel sad, hurt, grief, or disappointment. What I mean is that I love that I have a vehicle (tears) to move my sadness, hurt, grief and disappointment out of my body. I am grateful that I have become comfortable enough with crying that tears just naturally come when they need to.

In a recent article, I spoke about how much I love to laugh. Here I will be talking about how much I love to cry, and how cleansing, and important, it is to do so. Tears are our bodies way of releasing sadness, emotional pain, grief, frustration, anger, and yes, joy.

Stop Crying

Have you ever been so moved, or touched, by something someone said, or did, or experienced something so profound that you noticed you were tearing up? Did you allow yourself to cry freely, or did you suppress, or hide, your tears? So many of us find crying, or being with someone crying, uncomfortable.

How many times have we heard as a child, or adolescent, or even adult, "Don't cry"? This response implies there is something wrong with crying, that it is not okay to do so, or even more so, there is something wrong with us because we are crying. As opposed to the reality that tears are a natural response to distress.

Others of us have heard, or been asked, "What are you crying about?" Again, a clear message that something is wrong with the person who is crying. Or in dysfunctional families, some of us have heard, "If you don't stop crying, I'll give you something to cry about."

The Cleansing Gift of a Good Cry

Allowing ourselves to cry when the tears want to come is a gift we give ourselves. If we are with someone who feels the need to cry, allowing them to do so, and holding the space, is a gift we give them. So many of us push back our tears hoping we can contain them. Others feel sad, hurt, grief, and yet the tears are stuck and don't come. Our culture doesn't encourage and support crying, it's just the opposite-it discourages it. How many times have you noticed oneself, or someone else, crying and the person is immediately handed a tissue? This nonverbal gesture may imply, wipe your tears.

Your Tears are Welcome

In my psychotherapy office, although there are tissues on every table, I do not hand them to someone out of concern that they will misinterpret that I'm wanting them to stop crying. Instead I encourage someone who is crying by saying something like, "Just let that come. Your tears are very welcome here. It's okay."

Often, when I say this, the tears come in full force. Later when we process what happened I hear something like, "This is the first time, or one of the rare times, someone has been okay with my tears."

https://ezinearticles.com/?I-Love-to-Cry,-What-About-You?&id=9703524

Message From the Universe: Lack of Disappointment and Anger Equals Eternal Youth

"Disappointment, without anger, is the mark of an old soul.

Not being disappointed is the mark of a really old soul.

And trusting life so thoroughly that every step on its path is valued more than where it was supposed to take you, is the mark of eternal youth.

You hottie,

The Universe"

We all had many disappointments in our lives and because of the nature of some of these disappointments, extreme anger follows. Depending on how you manage this anger, you can allow yourself time to decompress a little and understand the nature of what triggered this disappointment and find the best plausible solution. Let's say your kid comes back with really bad grades at school. You will show disappointment, which is totally obvious and most probably anger because of the probable causes as to why he or she is failing school. Anger will automatically follow and lots of frustration. Grounding might be the best solution when it comes to solving the existing problem. So let's back up for a second. What really caused the demise of the kid's grade? Was it because you, the parent, didn't follow through and monitor his or her focus in school? Did you allow them to do whatever they wanted without providing structure so they can get back on track and do better in school? Do they have learning disabilities that you don't know anything about but not trying to ask or figure out with the teacher how they interact in a classroom environment? You need to step up as a parent and get more involved and attend to their need or call for help. Bad grades can be an indirect message to you that your kid needs assistance. Be vigilant and show that you are present and that you care. This is where all this can change.

Disappointment could also originate from failed relationships, not getting promoted even though you worked your butt off at work, not reaching your desired health goals even though you starve yourself and work out 24/7. Life will come with so much more disappointment so you need to be ready to deal with them on a daily basis. I am not trying to be grim and disappoint you with my statement but this is what life is all about. Dealing with these challenges is definitely how everything else in your life will be externally related to positive or negative outcomes. If you allow yourself to brush off disappointment and not allow anger to come into the equation, you will start seeing changes, and in some case, really positive changes. Your perception and approach to finding solution will be made with enthusiasm and they (talking about disappointments) will eventually pass you by without leaving any negative feelings of any sort. You have matured to a point of being proactive when it comes to looking ahead with a positive eye, no matter what comes your way. They are 7 active muscle groups (more if we need to mention the micro muscles underlying the major ones) involved when you are angry:

Eyebrow frowns - your eyebrows are pushed down in the middle, and pulled up at the sides.

Nose wrinkle - your nose is pushed up as your brows furrow.

Nostrils flare - your nostrils get wider and are pulled up.

Eyes wince - your eye muscles are pulled together, making your eyes feel tense.

Lip snarl - your upper lip is pulled up, showing your teeth.

Lip corners depressing - your lip corners are pulled down, to illustrate your dislike.

Jaw clinching - your jaw muscles tense up, making your teeth clinch and grind.

and ONLY 3 when you are happy:

Forehead relaxing - your forehead muscles relax, bringing your eyebrows up a little.

Eyes smile - the outer corners of your eyes begin to wrinkle as muscles push them together. Only when you really smile!

Lips smile - your lip corners are pulled up, showing your lovely smile!

So why do we need to exert that much energy when angry? The choice is yours. Plus, no one like to be around people who show their angry side. Life is too short to live this way, and by allowing happiness into our lives, we learn to let go of any grudges and move forward to better living.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-Lack-of-Disappointment-and-Anger-Equals-Eternal-Youth&id=9598350

Discovering Your Inner Peace and Joy

                  

FIND YOUR JOY... 

Part 1 (the Edge of negativity)

Truth be told, sadness, grieve, hardship, and negativity is the order of the day. 

From the very moment you wake up on a new day, to the close of the day, there is a likelihood that you would be bombarded with all forms of negativity, from all sorts of places.

With this hype ravaging the society and shaping the consciousness of the entire human race, there is an increase in the level of unhappiness and depression. No one has an immunity to this plague, (even when we pretend).

Billions of people all over the world murmur deep in their hearts against things around them. They have lost their happiness to jobs, relationships, decisions, sickness, policies, and cumbersome responsibilities.

People go to work these days with a smile on their faces and frowns in their hearts. They look forward to days when they can be free to be who they had dreamed of. Most couples only share a common shelter, they are more of flat mates than married people, with only the children as an evidence of the bond of love they once had.

Young people litter the streets and corners of the cities with nothing but eyes filled with unfulfilled visions and hopes with a mixture of fear and disappointment. Most have nothing to do except to embrace drugs, and vices. People are afraid to get old because they fear that the shackles of retirement will shorten the little life they have.

Truly, we live in the age and on the edge of negativity, 

BUT, this is the very reason why we must FIND OUR JOY.

Life in the original state is pure and joyous. Even though it is as if we live in the sea of negativity, there is an ISLAND of joy in the middle. That island bears in it the finest of things life can offer, it is filled with the true colors of a beautiful living. That island has the greatest treasures life can offer. That island is in YOU.

The reason why you are sad or unhappy is because you accepted what the environment gave you. You allowed people's comments, looks, attitudes, actions, inactions, policies and news to dictate your mood.

However, the decision to be happy lies in you, I tell you the truth, you can discover this blissful island.

But It starts with one step, and that is discovering yourself

Shalom! 

#seedtract

http://ezinearticles.com/?Discovering-Your-Inner-Peace-and-Joy&id=9702879

The Best Ways of Dealing With Disappointments

Too many a time we do not get what we expect. That is when disappointments set in. How can you turn them around? This article highlights some of the effective ways you can deal with them.

Here are a few way-outs:

1) Be calm and live in the moment

Soothe yourself and come back to think of the moment you are in. Are you angry, annoyed, full of bitterness and hate? Actually the moment you are in carry none of the feelings. You are calm and serene and nothing bothers and worries you. So why not practice it more often? When you are feeling low or less than, calm yourself down and concentrate on the present moment. You will have the rightful peace of mind.

2) Relax to and fro in an easy chair

After having a light meal, sit down in an easy chair and swing to and fro. Put on some light background music. Your feelings of bitter disappointment earlier in the day disappear. That is because swinging in your easy chair and getting caught up in the beats of the light music cheer you up. You can once more see the light of the present moment and feel joyous again.

3) Cry if you feel like

If the disappointment is too big to handle and you cannot bear it, allow your emotions to flow out by crying. Do not wallow in self-pity for too long. You know you can handle your problem because every problem has a solution in many ways. After you have allowed to drain out your emotions, you will feel okay. Everything is as perfect as it should be and you just bounce back to your normal schedule.

4) See if you can perceive it as a comedy

Allow yourself to perceive your disappointment in your mind's eye and see if you can convert it to a comedy. If you can allow yourself to laugh out a belly aching one, that should work wonders because you forget your disappointment in a flash.

5) Be your own cheerleader

Help yourself to be your own cheerleader when disappointment surrounds you. You can remember some of the things you simply love doing. Choose one and get absorbed in it, losing yourself in it and enjoying thoroughly. Where is there space for disappointment then?

Summing up, these are five great ways you can loosen yourself from the ropes of disappointment, bounce back and enjoy your life to the fullest.

Rosina S Khan has authored this article, highlighting how you can deal with disappointments effectively.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Best-Ways-of-Dealing-With-Disappointments&id=9697218

Someone Has Frustrated You. Now What Do You Do?

Can you keep your heart open after someone disappoints you?

…feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger,jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where it is that we’re holding back. They teach us to perk up and lean in when we feel we’d rather collapse and back away. They’re like messengers that show us, with terrifying clarity, exactly where we’re stuck. This very moment is the perfect teacher, and, lucky for us, it’s with us wherever we are―Pema Chödrön

When my daughter started school many years ago, it was very exciting to meet all the parents and make new relationships. I found most people to be very friendly and enjoyed my time at school functions and drop off and pick-up. There was one father that I used to try to speak with, however, who was not very friendly. He never said hello, unless I said it first, and never spoke with me unless I started a conversation. But on the times that I did approach him we had some nice conversations.

After about two years at the school, I got so annoyed when I saw him and again he said nothing to me one day that I actually felt a little tightening in my heart. I decided that I would not speak to him ever again, unless he spoke to me first. Of course, I still said hello if our eyes met, but thereafter I never approached him to speak unless it was a necessity.

I felt quite justified with my decision. For a few days following, when I saw him, I was so closed off I felt nothing. I had shut down and, at the moment, it felt better than being hurt and disappointed every time I saw him.

The next week, I arrived at school and learned that this man had passed away. I was consumed with guilt because the last few times I had seen him I had barely said hello. When I attended his memorial service, I found out he was a struggling musician who worked odd jobs to support his family. I also learned he was very uncomfortable at school because he felt he was an outsider. He had been having trouble making ends meet and had no health insurance so he was unable to get the medical tests he needed. His friends all loved him so much and told so many stories about this man who I learned had a very loving and kind heart.

One could argue that he was shut down to me and so my actions were warranted, but the fact is that my actions accomplished nothing, and certainly didn't help me to grow. Should every interaction only be about me getting what I crave? I felt rejected and unwanted so I closed my heart. Yet if I had taken these feelings as a teaching sign that here was exactly where I needed to refocus on love and grace, I would have kept my heart open. Who knows what we could have shared? This man was going through heartbreak and instead of leaning in and showing kindness when I felt hurt, I shut down because I was not getting what I felt I needed.

That day I made a commitment to myself that I would not run away from discomfort or hurt. Leaning into each situation that I perceive as difficult allows me to cultivate more understanding about myself and the world in which I and my children live. If I feel excluded, frustrated or angry, I try to sit with it and examine it. I allow my heart to feel, and I breathe and try to understand the possibilities behind a person’s response or situation. I try to see it less about what I am receiving and more about giving out kindness and love. And I have noticed that this change—this leaning into the situations that I fear may hurt me—brings me more peace and wisdom than shutting down ever did. It also has deepened my relationships with other people.

Maybe all of us can keep our hearts open a little longer today.

Maybe we can stay accessible for even just a few more minutes than we normally would.

Maybe there is something to learn or some way we can help another individual that is suffering.

Maybe staying open-hearted is how the world changes a little bit at a time.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-gift-maybe/201410/someone-has-frustrated-you-now-what-do-you-do