So You Want to Feel Happy?

Many people see being happy as their main aim in life. Ask them what they truly want and they'll probably reply, 'to feel happy'. However, I see happiness as a by-product in life, generated by activities and experiences, like a walk in nature, sitting people-watching in the mall, enjoying someone's company, having a particularly satisfying or successful day. Few of us set off in the morning with happiness as our main aim for the day.

When you want to feel happy it starts by appreciating the small things in life. We will often find that those things hold the key to real happiness. A child's laughter or them running over to us with the gift of a crumpled pine cone, a crisp autumnal day, a warm shower, listening to music; all those things which are so easy to take for granted can bring happiness and contentment when we stop and appreciate them.

Be sure to acknowledge your successes, no matter how small or unimportant you may think they are to others. They're a testament to your efforts and as such deserve recognition and acknowledgement. If you're working with a to-do list be sure to acknowledge all the additional things you do that are not on your list. Give yourself credit for those extras too.

A sense of achievement often comes when we've applied ourselves, worked hard and done our best. Even if something doesn't work out as well as we'd hoped that sense of accomplishment can bring its own reward, having tried, pushed ourselves and given it our best shot. We should smile and give ourselves a pat on the back for having had a go, and as such feel happy and proud of ourselves.

A positive attitude is an important element of being happy, where we appreciate what we have and are grateful for it. There is so much in life to be grateful for but we can often lose sight of the good fortune we have, especially if we're tempted to compare our lives to other people's in an unfavourable way. Remember that many people would feel blessed to be in our shoes.

Balance in life is also important. Constant partying and fun might seem like the dream, but if we ate cake all the time we'd end up bored, fat and not enjoying cake as much! Find a balance between work, responsibilities and 'me time'. Making an effort first often makes the reward of fun afterwards more meaningful and enjoyable.

Belonging, where we can be ourselves, perhaps as part of a group, makes a difference to our happiness levels. Knowing that we're accepted as we are, that we don't have to dress up, continually make an effort or pretend to be something we're not can really allow us to relax and feel happy. Being judged, watched or permanently under scrutiny is a familiar part of many people's everyday lives, so having places which are free from that burden is a big relief.

Being involved in charitable works and good acts can make us feel happy, having donated our time, skills or done something selfless. Doing good and helping others can bring a real sense of positivity into our lives, and it's often about the act itself, rather than any recognition we may receive.

Our comfort zone can be a happy place for a time, but it's important to leave it occasionally and explore further afield. Remember to accept opportunities and challenges that come your way, be prepared to scare yourself a little on a reasonably regular basis and avoid becoming too complacent, settled or comfortable.

Co-operating on a joint project or venture can bring much happiness and satisfaction into life. Think of a group of people tending a garden, volunteering or even sharing a commitment to exercise regularly or learn a new skill. It can be easier and more sustainable when we're working together, urging each other on, joking as we appreciate how much we've achieved.

Afterwards there's often a strong sense of camaraderie, of being part of a winning team, laughing at the failures, retelling anecdotes and in-jokes from the miscellany of adventures along the way, feeling happy at having been a part of the experience.

Whilst feeling happy may not be something we can necessarily choose for ourselves there are certainly many ways we can support ourselves and so become more comfortable and contented. It's often then that we smile and realise how happy we're feeling.

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Start by Being Happy

Many of us I'm sure would be thrilled at receiving an expensive gift, thinking, 'how lucky am I!' It would make our day and contribute to our feeling happy. But what if that gift was a substitute for time, love, attention and was being given in a placatory, keep-em-quiet way. Would we still be feeling happy, cared for, special?

Happiness often comes from being grateful for what we have, appreciating the value of what comes our way - good or bad, the simple things in life. Being given a free leaflet about a show or talk that we're interested in demonstrates that someone was thinking of us when they picked it up. The champagne cork from a special meal together, a pressed flower or lovely shell from a walk we enjoyed, a compilation of 'our' special songs; these are things that can make us happy, rather than an expensive gift quickly purchased on the way home.

What are some things that make you happy?

- Thoughtful gestures are important. When someone smiles and lets us out in traffic, holds the door open, gets us a coffee as they make one for themselves or an unexpected kindness, any of these are things that can really brighten our day.

- Unconditional praise and compliments can make us happy. When someone rewards us with a, 'good job', or 'you look nice', it brings a glow of positivity to the day. But if they add a comment like 'why don't you do that more often!' it becomes much less pleasant.

- External things can make us happy. Children's laughter, the smell of coffee or freshly baked bread, a cheesy song, a beautiful garden can make us pause for a moment and smile. Many of us will feel excited at hearing the chimes of an ice cream van. We don't want an ice cream, but the music triggers childhood memories.

- What about finding an unexpected fiver in your pocket? How rich do you feel, how fortunate! Or an old lottery ticket and you fantasise momentarily about it being the lucky million pound ticket!

- Your pet's welcome as you walk through the door can make all the day's stresses evaporate. Any concerns are forgotten as you're smothered under lots of love and affection.

- Unexpectedly finding a laundered shirt when you're late can make you happy. You've gained 10 minutes before you've even started the day! Or catching a bus you thought you'd missed, buying the last of your favourite bread or not putting on weight over the holidays.

Some tips to enhance your happiness levels;

- Clean sheets are number one on many people's list. Why not add a few drops of lavender to the final rinse cycle? Ensure your bedroom is your retreat, where you relax, destress and perhaps enjoy some intimate time with your partner. Alternatively, have an early night with a good book and dedicate time to yourself.

- Close the curtains, turn off the lights and relax in the dark revisiting your favourite music. Get out your photograph albums and reminisce over the stories they tell, the memories they evoke, or spend an afternoon catching up on those films you've been wanting to watch.

- Indulge in a bubble bath. Light your scented candles, warm the towels and allow yourself half an hour 'me' time. Buy a bunch of flowers and put them somewhere unexpected like the hallway or bathroom, then smile as you take your morning shower.

- Plan some family time over a lovely meal and catch-up on everyone's news. Arrange something fun with your partner or friends; a walk, some sports, an evening out, or allow time to dress up and enjoy a special event.

- Enjoy some quiet time by sitting and eating lunch. Eating on the run can become a habit, but give yourself a break and destress. Buy a bar of quality chocolate and savour every mouthful.

- Settle down with a drink and phone a friend for a leisurely chat. Invite people round for coffee. It doesn't take much; a jar of coffee, a few biscuits and you have a pleasant get-together with friends.

- Do good works. Give to your favourite charity and feel happy that you're able to help others less fortunate. Volunteer and dedicate time to a local charity or amateur group. They often rely on volunteers to survive.

- Rise early and take a walk while the air is still fresh and it's quiet. Or enjoy an afternoon in the park watching the deer, swans and ducks. Maybe borrow a friend's dog and have a good walk. Marvel at the power of nature as you watch the sunset, sunrise or a thunderstorm from the comfort of your home.

- The beach is often a happy place. Walk barefoot on the sand, collect a few shells and practice skimming pebbles on the sea.

- Smiles are contagious. Brighten someone's day by giving a compliment, a smile, saying 'please' and 'thank you'. Yours might be the only kindness they receive that day.

So many of the things I've included are free or cost very little, once again reinforcing how money doesn't buy you happiness. It might help, but it's not the only factor!

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Choosing Happiness And Setting Smart Goals In Today's World

What if I informed you that you have the capability and potential to simply decide if you are pleased with life or not?

Yes, happiness is an option.

You can not depend on somebody else to make you happy and pleased with the way your life is going. I found out that you have to actually make the selection of being happy.

How can you choose to be happy? The very same away you choose to take the action of a simple smile.

You want to purchase a new pair of blue jeans so you pick a style that you like and which feels great, and perhaps a pair of shoes to match.

You would not purchase the jeans and the shoes together if each didn't fit or feel well, would you?

Why do we keep deciding on feelings and sensations that do NOT make us side with happiness?

Well many people don't realize that you can choose bliss and joy over feeling upset or mad about something.

It's not incorrect to feel upset however dwelling on it and letting the anger simmer for too long heading to a boiling point can have bad outcomes.

Choosing contentment with the happiness after you realize your anger has shown up (or even choosing to be calm) can be advantageous.

We choose our sensations and inner feelings based on our thoughts, and no one can do that for us.

Exactly what about those who aggravate us or make us mad?

In a previous session I discussed free e-books and other information on the web for how to exercise the power of attraction in your every day life.

We have the power of choice, but a lot of times we allow our ego-- that fearful and doubting aspect in us to react out of anger.

The Course in Miracles further states by asking, "Do you realize that the ego must set you on a journey which can not but lead to a sense of futility and depression?"

Rather of taking a psychological time out and knowing that what that person stated has to do with them we unconsciously decide to react. The response is generally from anger or worry.

It's a re-action, not an action.

How do we stop these habits of wrong-mindedness where we're blocking out our inner Light of Spirit?

We have to keep our feelings in check and not respond instantly to exactly what is tossed at us.

We have to control our ways for reacting rather of simply responding to exactly what someone does or says.

What we have to do is act upon our own accord and not let the actions of others affect us.

By doing that we remain conscious of our own thoughts and feelings and not let what others do to us affect our state of mind.

We can always decide on joy and then we shall find we're always choosing happiness.

At first it might be challenging to simply switch your thoughts and sensations from the self-doubt, anger, or fear of the ego that is in us all as humans.

But sooner or later you will notice Spirit being more in control as you continue with self-improvement goals.

(Please note I also suggest this related article to help with living the law of attraction for a better life and to build a life on real passion.)

To happiness in your life every single day!

https://ezinearticles.com/?Choosing-Happiness-And-Setting-Smart-Goals-In-Todays-World&id=9980689

The Trouble With Being No.1 in Everything (Rosina S Khan)

Do you see any trouble with being No.1 in everything? Or, do you consider it a life full of bliss? I talk about this aspect in this article. Read on to find out.

Sure, to the amateur and inexperienced, it may look like a life full of bliss. But the reality is that it's not.

Back when I studied at school abroad, my Dad coached me so well in every course that I always stood first in class. I walked with an air of jubilance and superiority all the time. But little did I know that I had attracted lots of enemies over several years.

Through school politics, I was deliberately thrown to second position, much to the happiness of my backstabbers. Life seemed so unfair and terrible. I remember crying and crying until tears would no longer flow. Then, with the decision of my parents. I dropped off a few optional courses and began to concentrate on fewer courses and upgraded my grades by the next semester and remained steady all along I was in that school.

So the trouble with being No.1 in something or everything is that you lose a lot of friends and become lonely. But if you do not compete to be the very best and remain steady, life is a lot easier.

It is up to you whether you want to take that stress and strain.

By being the topmost in something, you do earn a lot of fame and power. But life is not all about fame and power but rather how many friends you have and how much you enjoy.

Life is about being happy. And you cannot be happy being lonely and not having friends.

At this point in life, I realize this aspect so much. But life has dealt with me harshly when I had literally everything and everything has been snatched away from me except my pride.

That's when I took up writing and I started writing more and more as I was being credited gradually by the universe. Now I have reached a point when I need to think and act differently so that I can take the next forward steps that will make me soar to greater heights, having a life full of fun, friends and happy times simultaneously.

I have dreams to follow and further goals to realize. I am working with affirmations and reading self-help books on how to stay unstuck and move forward. These are my first steps. Once I am done with these steps, I will know what my next steps would be and accordingly, act upon them.

The same applies to you. If you had worked hard to go to the very top and life just catapulted you off stray, find yourself back, stay grounded, discover your passions, work on them at your pace, monetize them and make lots of new like-minded friends by networking.

Life is sure to smile back at you and treat you gently this time. It would be my advice though not to compete to the very top but remain steady with regular income and regular friends.

https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Trouble-With-Being-No.1-in-Everything&id=10214287

Internal Tickings (By Gini Cunningham)

Even though Word likes to red-squiggle the word "tickings" I find it the only suitable term for all that goes on inside of me - whether I am referring to my brain, my heart, or my soul. The tickings are what make me tick and there are several of those and so I have my invented term. I know that if I use it enough times (and you will discover many usages throughout my previous writings) and if you use it in conversation and written correspondence and then if three of your friends do the same, the idea will spread and soon we will be able to locate this word in the dictionary. All of this is because of our internal drive and determination, our tickings.

Tickings are all of those little items that make us into unique individuals. Our tickings include our way of thinking, acting, reacting, and doing. They are fashioned with brainwaves and heartbeats, cognitive reflections and soul sense and scents. They make us laugh and cry, smile and frown. They accentuate our love of beauty and grace as we abhor violence and cruelty. Tickings sometimes require focus and concentration as we wade through the muddle and confusion of the day. At other times they operate with full automaticity with nary a thought or action needed.

My tickings include boundless energy and enthusiasm and joy for wading into virtually any task. Even when I find myself in over my head I find a way to breath, regroup, rethink, and realign for success. I tend to bulldoze onward but I do not believe I am a bully. I like for others to do their share but when they can't or won't, I usually find a way to get things done. Nagging and begging rarely work; doing does. I find it hard to believe that some people are able to sit and do nothing but stare at a book or television all day and night, but so be it - that is their way and I have no right to judge.

While my husband has fairly much given up on curtailing my active swirl, my children occasionally chide me and try to force me into a quiet, tranquil zone. I have tried to explain to them that I can't, that that isn't me, but they are not yet totally resigned to this idea. Fortunately they mean well so as they pitch in to help I recognize how important their belief in me is to me. I also know that hard work and dedication can be contagious and so I hope that they "catch" some of my internal, eternal drive. Actually, as I watch them work and interact with others, I realize that they share my zest for living and for life.

Imagine my surprise when I was chatting with friends and explaining my belief in the happiness found with being content with our tickings when one lady chirped, "Oh! I hate being so busy, not able to sit down. I want to do nothing but laze on the couch!!" And here I thought that enjoying ambitious get-up-and-go was fantastically exhilarating. I worked to assert that being happy with how we are is critical to a fruitful, fulfilling life, especially when that trait is comprised of energy and personal self-determination. Yes, we must strive to do better, to be stronger, to excel and do good deeds, but there must also be an acceptance of certain characteristics, especially those that are quite positive.

Later that evening as I mulled this conversation, I realized that I must be happy with the person I am and others need to seek solace in the person they are. I cannot, must not, criticize or try to redirect thinking if their tickings are taking them in another direction. What are your tickings? List three or four or for you rapid-fire thinkers jot down twenty or thirty. Then mark them as + positive, x neutral, - negative. Assess and evaluate how your tickings measure up to the person you have become. It's really very fun!

http://ezinearticles.com/?Internal-Tickings&id=9054031

Highlighting Positives Within The Law of Attraction

When you look at self-improvement as a whole, you're going to be littered with solutions. There's no "one" thing that works best. There's a lot of things that can work, and many people are finding this through the Law of Attraction. This is a way of thinking that goes beyond simple tasks, it can create outstanding results. For instance, one of the main benefits is in regards to coming into a lot of money. While this may sound insane at first glance, you'll find that it's just a starting line that is worth exploring on a bigger picture.

Attracting Positivity

Think about the infectious nature of a smile. When you are smiling, it seems like the whole world will oblige in returning this for you. You're going to find that few people are going to have a disdain for this, and it shows with everyone that has a positive element in their lives. There's a beauty in smiling and being happy, and it comes with positivity. That same principle that causes this notion to be infectious is the same thing that you are going to be pursuing within the notion of attraction. However, attraction in the law is something that goes out to the universe, and returns dividends that are not just physical.

Changing Yourself For The Better

Right now, many people are fighting to get a semblance of self-esteem. They aren't feeling good, they lack confidence, and aren't really sure how to progress in the right arenas. That can be changed by looking at the silver lining in life, and chasing positive elements. The more you work with positivity, the better you're going to be at enjoying the fruits of your labor. Changing things for the better starts with looking at what you're thankful for, and then building on that over time. You'll find that changing for the better is an easy thing to get done, if you just focus on listing things out with a pen and paper.

Avoiding Negativity

The best thing that comes with the Law of Attraction is in regards to casting aside negative things. You don't want to surround yourself with this. This is a sure fire way to decrease happiness, and cause a lot of issues to rise up within your mind, and body. If you've never tried to fight this before, this is your chance to shake things up. The more you chase different paths, the better you are going to feel inside, the more your mood will elevate, and the better your life will become.

At the end of the day, you are going to find that attraction is not a singular thing. It's something that encompasses a whole different world view. Take time to focus on the bigger picture and you are going to see a huge jump in your path towards freedom from negative elements. This all starts with recognizing that you control a lot more than you give yourself credit for, and then goes into a full changing scale.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Highlighting-Positives-Within-The-Law-of-Attraction&id=9387731

Who Fills Your Success Plate?

I was thinking about the demands we place upon ourselves those others place on us. I noticed that some people have mountains of tasks before them and cheerfully and effectively plow through them without major disruptions to their lives. Others however find themselves overwhelmed and fall further and further behind in their lives.

What is the difference?

Some will automatically say the first group is simply more organized than the second. Some will say that the second doesn't have the skills to deal with it. Others will say that the first group is task oriented and the second is feeling oriented.

Some or all of these things may be true at any given time. But these don't explain the fact that ALL of us fit into both groups at some point or another in our lives. No one is forever focused and effective. No one is forever overwhelmed by life.

So what is the difference?

It boils down to one thing we believe. Motivation.

Not the rah-rah type. I am talking about the source of why these things must be done, the reason you take action. What is the motive for your behavior?

Is it internal or external? In other words, are you motivated by things you choose to be motivated about? Or are you motivated because you let someone or something else tell you that's why you should take action?

Are these things imposed upon us or do we create them because we have the desire to do them or have the results? Is your life controlled by you or by others? Whose goals are you working on? Yours or others? Motivation is entirely something you decide. You decide how you feel about something and whether or not it's important enough to act.

When you feel overwhelmed and unable to cope with life's challenges, look at these challenges. The ones causing the most stress are almost always those imposed by others. These are external factors. Your challenges that are fun to do and effortless to tackle (no matter the difficulty or complexity) are almost always ones of your own choosing.

The key to being happy and productive in times like that is to simply fill your plate with your own projects or projects of your own choosing.

While this is not always 100% possible, it is a great goal to work toward.

A final thought here... When you are getting that overwhelmed feeling, examine what is before you and see what external things you can safely get rid of (without losing your job for instance).

You can always do more than someone else when your plate is filled by YOU and theirs is filled by someone else!

So, fill your success plate yourself as much as you can.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Who-Fills-Your-Success-Plate?&id=9480329

What Does Happiness Actually Mean?

Intuitively, happiness is a feeling we get that we associate with having joy, abundance and peace.

It's the opposite of feeling depressed, gloomy or sad. Being happy is something that people will generally consider good while being sad is not so great.

But there are degrees of happiness and different people feel it in different ways.

A perfect example of this comes from the TV drama show called Everybody Loves Raymond.

The parents of Raymond were constantly fighting. Everyone believed they hated each other.

But in one particular episode, it was revealed that their behavior towards each other is how they are happy. The back and forth digs that they give each other is actually affection in their eyes.

While I personally believe that fights are just a low-consciousness way of shaking the boring, monotonous, dull routine up and spike some emotions in a relationship, there may be some truth about the fact that happiness is driven from within instead of without.

There are those who are not very good at showing emotion or those who are excellent at hiding their true feelings. They could be super excited and yet give no expression to show for it.

It's hard to read these people.

It's hard to predict their contradictory behaviors.

It's hard to know when it is the best time to bring up certain topics of conversation to them.

Then, there are people who go overboard and show excessive happy emotions. They become too cheerful and positive to a point that is kind of annoying.

To many, these people seem almost unreal as no one can be that happy all the time. They are so perky that it is hard to take them seriously. Sometimes, you may even think they are faking happiness.

Wikipedia defines happiness as "a mental or emotional state of well-being defined by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy."

Even this definition allows for varying degrees of happiness.

The point is, there is no right answer as to what happiness means to any person just as there is no one definition on how it should be expressed. It is as personal as any other emotion.

Most people will agree that when it does occur, happiness makes you feel good. It is something that people try to continue for as long as possible, even though it is not possible for it to go on indefinitely.

The fact of life is that you will reach a certain point or event that changes your emotions and you will lose the great feeling of happiness.

Anyhow, generally you do want to maximize the good feelings of happiness whenever it is possible, for as long as you ca because happiness has been shown to be better for your overall health.

Doctors have long believed that patients that maintain a positive, upbeat and happy outlook during serious medical conditions have a much better chance of recovery than people who are gloomy about their prospects.

Whatever your personal definition of happiness is, go live it, experience it and thrive with it today!

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On Being Happy As a Choice

For all of us, it is natural to feel sad when someone closest to us passes away, or get angry when someone does wrong to us. But have you ever encountered a person who feels "happy" amidst such situations? I guess it would be me, but we're more than 7 billion here on Earth now, and it's very possible to find even just one who's like that.

American psychiatrist Elizabeth Kubler Ross authored "Stages of Change," a book that discusses on how a person normally deals with his life problems in general. According to the book, there are 5 stages that a person goes through every time a negative change (problem) happens in his life: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. Taking for example a man's grief over his girlfriend's death due to a crime-related, a sudden situation, say a freaky shooting spree, the "moving on" process goes like this:

DENIAL: "It's not true! She's still alive!"

ANGER: "Why the heck this thing happened? Of all the people, why her? She doesn't deserve this?"

BARGAINING: "If I was just at her side the moment it happened, then I would have saved her."

DEPRESSION: "I should have died with her! I'd rather take my life than live without her!"

ACCEPTANCE: "I know she's not here anymore, so I guess I should get over this and move on."

In some cases, especially the extreme ones, going through the "moving on" stages can take longer periods of time than expected depending on the gravity of the situation itself and/or the impact made to the person involved plus the actions he had taken during the process. Subsequent negative actions usually prolong the process include - but not limited to - habitual drinking, drug abuse, and suicidal attempts, all leading to the person's death if not handled accordingly.

On the other hand, the "moving on" process can also go faster, although skipping the stages in-between Denial and Acceptance is not possible. The faster recovery from negative change depends on how the person handled himself positively in all aspects - physical, emotional, mental, social, and spiritual, among others - and how he understands both the situation itself and this "healing" process (best learned beforehand). People with such abilities adapt the principles of "mind over matter" and "mind over heart."

The human brain actually works in the same fashion as the computer's processor which commands consequent actions to the machine. Thus, the human brain has the power to "tell" everything the person should do including how he should emotionally react on various life situations - a clear opposite to the popular belief that "the heart dictates our emotions." However, the sets of actions that the computer's processor performs can be altered via data manipulation; and so with the human brain via conditioning and acquisition of new knowledge. As mentioned earlier, if the person, at the first place, has accepted the harsh realities of life including the existence of death and suffering, understood the process of "moving on" from negative change, and has the ability to make and maintain a positive outlook out of the various adversities of life, then the person's emotional recovery can go faster, thus his life would go back to normal at an earlier time. Just think of how Miss Philippines quickly stood up from her accidental downfall onstage in her icy-blue frock at the Miss Universe 1999 preliminaries and you'll see what this means.

Yes, it is human nature to feel sad or angry upon the situation's call, but such circumstances don't really tell us to dwell on them forever. Also, it is not the situation that makes us react accordingly but just us ourselves. Sadness and anger, among all other negative feelings, are just options; and having said that, happiness can also be a choice. For the narrowest of minds, being happy amidst negative situations is evil and tantamount to hoping for the worst for other people; but in reality, it is about finding the brighter side of even the worst things in life and looking forward to it with a smile.

http://ezinearticles.com/?On-Being-Happy-As-a-Choice&id=9448074

The Top Secret to Being Happy Forever: Science Says It Is Possible!

Is it possible to stay happy forever? Yes, theoretically it is absolutely possible to be always happy. Feeling happy (or any other feeling for that matter) is a result of chemicals produced by your body. There are two chemicals that can make you happy: dopamine and oxytocin. If you get happy on dopamine, it is only temporary. If you get happy on oxytocin, there is no limit to how long you can sustain it. Moreover, oxytocin-induced happiness turns on healthy genes, affects the microbiome in a positive way and helps cellular regeneration, among other things. Dopamine-induced happiness doesn't do any of that. So the goal is to make your body produce oxytocin rather than dopamine in order to sustain happiness.

Firstly, here is how you produce dopamine: You plan a shopping frenzy and start to get excited (dopamine starts to rise). You are at the mall, looking at wonderful shoes (dopamine raises even more). You try on the shoes and pick the ones you like (dopamine climaxes / you feel super happy). You swipe your credit card (dopamine starts to decrease / you start to look for the next stimulant to make you happy). I am not making this up. Studies have been documented on dopamine levels during shoe shopping expeditions and that's exactly the pattern of "high" and "low" that was observed.

For guys it looks like that: You plan your new car purchase (dopamine rises / the excitement starts building up). You are test driving your prospective new acquisition (dopamine rises more). You decide on the car you are going to buy (wow, dopamine levels are over the sky / you feel super happy). You sign the lease and there it goes again - the dopamine starts to wear off and with that your happiness starts to disappear too.

On a daily basis, we get our dopamine/happiness fix from coffee, chocolate, complements and approval from other people and other such stimulants. It feels good for a second and the next second we are looking for the next fix because the previous one just wasn't enough. What's more, the next dose of dopamine stimulation needs to be higher or else we won't feel its effect. Sounds familiar? Sounds exhausting? It is definitely not sustainable because you are always looking for an external stimulus (coffee, your parents' approval, your partner's love, your kids' accomplishments, your own accomplishments, more accomplishments, more coffee, more chocolate... wow, that is exhausting!)

Now, how about we make oxytocin and get happy on it instead? You make oxytocin by being in gratitude, by loving people (while expecting nothing in return), by sharing with loved ones, by caring and genuinely giving to others (again, expecting nothing in return!), by practicing forgiveness, by feeling compassion. The more you do that, the more it comes back, and the more oxytocin you make. There is no limit to how much oxytocin your body can produce; therefore there is no limit to your happiness. And the best part: it is entirely internally sourced and costs nothing! You feel sad - decide to give, and to love, and to forgive. You feel angry - turn to gratitude. You feel tired - spend time with loved ones, share with people you care for. You can also mediate. Or say a mantra for a minute or two (here is my favorite one: "I love you. Please forgive me. I forgive you. Thank you.") The point is, you can be sad, angry, tired or unhappy and be happy with all of it and grateful for all of it. This way, you are happy when you are happy, and you are also happy when you are unhappy.

If you need help with making oxytocin, you may want to consider doing a meditation course, or some kind of emotional release therapy or a BodyTalk session.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Top-Secret-to-Being-Happy-Forever:-Science-Says-It-Is-Possible!&id=9447258

How To Keep Yourself Happy

Think about how dull the world would be without happiness. Without happiness, it would be like donuts without sprinkles and a cup of tea without biscuits. The world needs its equilibrium, a balance like that of Yin and Yang's. Without happiness, imagine what the world would be without the vibrant colors of the flowers and the sounds of the morning birds that flew by.

The world spins around its axis and never stops its mechanical work. With heavy tasks upon its shoulder, never for once it complains or expresses its unhappiness. And yet, us living creatures deal with unhappiness and dissatisfaction every day.

Why Do People Become Unhappy?

People have varying reasons upon why they are unhappy. Unhappiness can come from large issues and serious ones like the increase in unemployment rate. In various parts of the globe, not only it leads to economic crisis, but also affects the quality of living. Sometimes, people can be unhappy with the littlest things- when one loses a notepad or when a pencil accidentally breaks. Being happy is not at all an impossible state; though, it is truly difficult to remain 'happy' at all times. With numerous factors that affect one's feelings, emotions, and thoughts, happiness runs away and dissolves into thin air from time to time.

Do What Makes You Feel Like Being Yourself

In most cases, people feel 'happy' whenever they get to do what they like. Be it sports or music, getting oneself emerged into activities or hobbies can help increase self-confidence and self-value. It is highly important to respect oneself, understand what one likes, and know what can be done to be in a healthy mood. Doing what others do to look good does not meet the requirements of being happy. It is crucial to do enjoyable things that keeps the atmosphere healthy, happy, and cheerful.

Happiness Needs No Accompany

Being sociable does not relate purely to happiness. Although meeting people and having social interactions trigger happiness in most cases, one can be happy without a companion. Alone-time is a completely different concept from isolation. Having some private time or alone-time not only allows one to have some 'quiet' thinking time, but also enables one to ask several questions about the things happening around them. Listening to classical music, planting trees, cooking, reading, and so many other activities are available for one to enjoy the time alone when friends and family members are not around.

The quickest way to happiness is optimism. Be a positive thinker and happiness will definitely come along the way. Whenever there is an obstacle, think of it as a challenge. This way, only the bell of happiness rings.

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Being Happy - Dreaming Ahead 5 of 365

We Must Practice -

When you lose that passion or that feel production and many other subjects begin to drive down. It becomes clear that the more you love what you are doing the more productive you will be. Even better, the more passionate you are about a project the less you will want to sleep and eat.

This truth comes from the many that have accomplished a certain amount of greatness. A person must truly believe with all their heart and they will overcome any obstacle. As a business one may ask will you ask customers if they will buy with you again and if not why not. Learn exactly what you have to learn to get where you want to be.

We can set up measures to know how we are doing. Listing the amount of money, you will want to make is not enough. We have to come up with ideas that will support your goal. For a better relationship you may choose to compliment your significant other on a daily basis. Maybe you will pick up that relationship book because you are choosing to increase your relationship happiness. Reading personal development books is yet another way to really increase one part of your life.

Next we will list 3 things that you are grateful for.

1. _________________________

2. _________________________

3. _________________________

The aim here to realize that you can be happy for those things that you are grateful for. One of my primary grateful feelings comes when I think of family. My wife, my children, my parents, my sisters and brother. Thinking of these people brings about great feelings within my heart. I am so passionate about those people.

Become the change that you want to see in your life. If you are not acting like that how are other people supposed to know how to act. It is time for some action. You have some idea brewing in your head right now. Act it. In this very moment stop reading this part of Dreaming Ahead and take one action to working on your dream. Set up a schedule. Call someone. Begin a conversation. Meet a new group. Grab a book and start reading about what you are trying to accomplish.

You still might be reading this and that is okay but I am not going to give you anything else until you begin taking action. Come back tomorrow.

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Can You Really Make Yourself Happy?

Many people talk about how you make yourself happy and how it's not someone else who makes you happy.

I say that you make yourself angry, and no one can make you angry other than yourself, but I disagree with saying you can make yourself happy on your own just by choosing to be happy.

Being angry and being happy are not the same. Anger is due to your interpretation of an event, but happiness requires fulfilling your need to be valuable, just like hunger requires food.

In order to be valuable, someone has to value you. Diamonds and gold are worthless if no one is willing to pay for them. Likewise, you are worthless if you are not serving a useful purpose in some way, and your subconscious mind knows this. There is no way around it, it's the nature of the human spirit.

Happiness can be increased through the process of removing or eliminating negative emotions. Simply by not being negative or angry, you will by default, be happier. But true deep happiness and self-satisfaction comes when you are useful in some way and so you feel worthy of your existence.

Finding love and a relationship of course does that, because you are loved and wanted, but also a job that is in a way useful, charity work, creating something of beauty every day, in these ways, you are useful and making other people's lives or day a little better. My motto is; 'Everyday, make someone smile.'

If you can do this you will be happy, but if you are only looking at yourself, that happiness is short lived and shallow and cannot last. This is why buying new cloths or toys is a short lived happiness, it only serves your human ego and not your deeper heart.

If you cannot find lasting happiness in your life, then it is obvious, you are looking in the wrong place. You cannot give it to yourself, you cannot simply choose to be happy and actually be happy for very long before the imagination wears off. There is something else. Allegorically we could say, another world, another dimension, is where your happiness lies.

A change in your view of how to be happy is required. You cannot make yourself happy alone. Happiness requires being useful in some way, and that means there must be someone else involved.

When you accept that you are forever dependent on someone else for your happiness and self-satisfaction, you will no longer be like Harry looking for his keys in the garden when he lost them in the house. Why is he looking in the garden? his friend asked him. 'Because the light is much better out here.'

The flashy things of life are easy to see, and the marketing tells us that will make us happy. But the real happiness comes from something outside of you which gives meaning to your life. That may be hidden and harder to find, but it is there.

Do not be lazy in your search. Start looking for what may be as alien to your concepts as another world. You are dependent on water, food, air and shelter to keep your body alive. You are equally dependent on other people to give you a purpose in your life to keep your soul happy and your heart and mind at peace.

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Unfold the 5 Secrets to Live a Happy Life

We all strive to lead a happy life. But being happy is not that easy. If you are concerned about money then happiness is definitely far beyond your reach. The actual fact is that "money can't buy happiness". Happiness is all around us in the things, in the people and yet we fail to grasp it.

A psychological research has found out that happiness can be achieved in very simple ways. These are-

Practice gratitude

Irrespective of the fact where they are and what they have been doing the happy people finds things to be grateful for. They remain less stressed and have low levels of depression. One can find gratitude even in the smallest of the things. This can be a book, delicious dinner, a challenging video game, and many more things. If you focus on the good things and feel gratitude for them then you will have less stress.

Smile more

If you are having a hard day cheer yourself by thinking of something or someone that always makes you happy. In this way you will be happy again. The sure analysis of this is still not done but some scientists believe that due to the release of dopamine the feel god factor comes in you. So, put that cute smile on your face wherever you go.

Embrace your mistakes

Mistakes are normal. But if you bring ego in between your mistakes and agreeing them then that is totally wrong. This will be an obstruction in your way of growth. Thus, learn to embrace your mistakes and start learning more. You will see that this quality will make you more likeable among the people.

Be optimistic

Happy people are more open to responding to negative events in a positive way than the unhappy lot. They have high confidence levels that help them to overcome negative thoughts and actions. This attitude also helps one to recover from illness, solve problems in difficulty, etc.

Forgive everything

Do not keep any hard feelings in your mind neither encourage one to do the same. The hard feelings do block happiness when we keep them. We do not feel truly happy then. If you forgive, it does not mean that the earlier things had been for good but it is that you are no longer in a mood to carry on with the ill feeling.

Along with all this practice self love. We are sure that this will keep you happy and help you to lead a happier life that you had always dreamt of.

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The Key to Happiness You Wish You Never Had

Most people would argue that being happy is much more important than being unhappy.

Is that really the case?

You won't find books with titles such as 10 Easy Steps Towards Less Joy in Your Life, or More Unhappiness: A Practical Guide Towards a Sadder You. If you happen to find books like these, I'd bet good money they're not selling that well!

When you Google the word "happy" there is an astounding 2,7 billion results. Searching for "unhappiness" only yields around 80 million results.

Society clearly has much more interest in happiness than in unhappiness, but does that make unhappiness any less important?

No, it doesn't. They are equally important because happiness simply cannot exist without unhappiness. There can be no happiness without unhappiness.

Confused? Let me explain.

It's All Relative

Close your eyes and imagine... actually don't close them, otherwise you can't read any further, so just imagine then, that every place on earth has the exact same temperature. In this world, the words hot and cold have no meaning, because after all, everything has the exact same temperature.

Suppose then the temperature in the Arctic decreases while remaining the same everywhere else. Now, and only now, can we refer to the Arctic as being cold. Why is this? Because now, and only now, is the rest of the globe relatively warmer than the Arctic.

The temperature imbalance was required to give meaning to the words hot and cold. Cold, being the one extreme, only found meaning once the other extreme of warmth found its meaning. The one extreme can't exist without the other.

Happiness and unhappiness is certainly no different. Happiness after all is an extreme emotion, with unhappiness being the other extreme. Happiness only exists because unhappiness exists. It's therefore essential to be unhappy at times so we can be happy during other times.

Still not convinced?

We're all 55 Years Old

Suppose that every single person on earth is 55 years old. In this make-believe world, people are neither young, nor old because everyone has the exact same age. The words young and old have absolutely no meaning in this world because every single person is 55 years old.

The arrival of a 15-year old alien will bring about the change. As soon as he lands on earth, an imbalance is created, giving meaning to the words young and old. Now, and only now, that someone (or is that something) younger than everyone else exists, can the words young and old have their meaning.

The people who are 55 were never old. Only after the arrival of the 15-year old extreme can they be referred to as being old. The arrival of the 15-year old has given meaning to the words young and old. The one extreme exists, only because the other extreme exists.

Similarly, unhappiness has to exist for happiness to exist.

The Poor Makes The Rich (Or is it the Other Way Round?)

Why are people rich? Sure, they work hard or got a lucky break, but the word rich is a relative concept. A rich person may be someone who is worth $100 million, $10 million or someone who is worth only $1 million.

In some developing countries, a person who is worth only $10 000 could be considered rich. Why is this? People are deemed rich because they have more money compared to those around them, and not because of the actual sum of money that they have.

Rich people therefore exist only because poor people exist around them. The one extreme can only exist because the other exists.

It is crucial for us to experience unhappiness in establishing benchmarks against which we can compare our current-day emotions. If unhappiness did not appear in our past, we will have a skewed benchmark against which to compare the emotions we experience today. It's all relative and unhappiness is essential in making this relative comparison possible.

Happy Meal

A person, who has had enough to eat throughout his life, will not be struck with happiness when presented with a plate of food, simply because he has never experienced the unhappiness associated with being hungry. To him it will be just another meal.

A person who has faced starvation on the other hand, has experienced unhappiness associated with lack of food. When this person is presented with the same plate of food, he will be overjoyed. His happiness results from the unhappiness of not having had enough to eat in his past.

Unhappiness plays a vital role in life. In fact, it is absolutely essential for us to know unhappiness, if we ever want to know happiness. Without unhappiness, there will not be happiness; only a dull and monotonous journey through a life filled with mediocrity.

Whenever you experience unhappiness again, be consoled by the thought that you're simply experiencing an emotion essential to your happiness.

The key to happiness is a regular dose of unhappiness.

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Being Happy - It's Better to Give Than to Receive

We've all heard that it's better to give than to receive, yet we've misunderstood how it really works to benefit all involved. Most think that giving involves only money or acts of charity. There is a deeper element to giving that guarantees your happiness and the enhanced happiness of those you interact with.

Giving is based on you having something and passing it on to someone else, easy, right? But what if what you are giving is judgment and criticism? What if giving is based in trying to "fix" or change someone else? What if conditions are being placed on the gift? That changes the energy of giving into manipulation and continues a cycle of anger, fear, lack, sickness and poverty.

You can learn to give in a way that actually delivers happiness, health, wealth and prosperity to all. Giving that changes the world involves being able to see the best, the highest level of goodness in everyone and holding them in that energy even when they are not aware of it or living it. Perhaps you want your children to be more content and do their homework and keep their room clean without you needing to nag. You give promises of rewards if they do these things, you go out of your way to meet their needs in order to get them to give in return. What happens? The cycle continues.

Try this instead. Close your eyes and relax. Use your powerful imagination, which creates everything you experience, and see your children happy, cooperative, enjoying making good grades in school and delighting in a clean home environment. In your imagination interact with them, say to them what you would say if this were actually so. Hear them talking and saying what they would say if this situation were actually a reality right now.

Break it down to a small interaction where they are in their orderly room, homework done, laughing with you and saying Thank You in response to your congratulating them their report card. Practice this until it feels totally real. Let the joy bubble up inside you.

This type of giving actually lifts yourself and others into a higher expression and experience. It's easy, and more effective than anything else you can do. Give the greatest of all gifts to the world, the gift of love, abundance, success, health and acceptance. It will pay off in a multitude of ways.

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How to Stop Being Resentful and Start Being Happy

We all attract situations we like to complain about - situations that drain our physical energy, disturb our emotional equilibrium and waste our money. How many times have you had to listen to someone's problems out of obligation? How unhappy are you about some of your relationships? Does your partner annoy you because they are not tidy, they are irresponsible, they don't earn enough, they are not sophisticated enough, they eat too much, they drink too much, and they don't care about your feelings? How many times have you complained about all the things you resent, and to how many people? How long have you played the role of a legitimate victim, feeling righteous and drinking your own poison?

Even if it only happens to you occasionally, it is time you learnt how to deal with the resentment. It's time you took control.

So let's say you are in a relationship you are not happy about. Your partner is moody, they get angry and they criticize you a lot. You know it won't change - it has already been going on long enough for you to have worked out as much. What do you do to turn things around? Quite simply - you commit! You commit 100% to either getting out of the relationship or staying in the relationship. Commitment is making a conscious choice today about which way you want to go, and putting your mind, your soul and your heart where your words are. By now you have enough information and you know what you are in for. Importantly, if you choose to stay in the relationship (which is a perfectly valid choice) you automatically lose the right to complain. But don't despair! The good news is that when you consciously choose a situation and you commit to it 100%, resentment no longer fits in energetically. If you continue to complain and keep the victim mentality, it means you are not committed. You are half way in, half way out. Commit! You are either in or you are out. Either way, your commitment will dissolve your resentment and open the door to happiness.

Now, what if you are facing a situation you have no prior information about? How do you consciously choose something without knowing the outcome? Quite simply - you commit again! You commit to the process, not to the outcome. If you have to have a conversation with your boss about your work load, commit to the conversation while releasing the attachment to a particular outcome. Again, with your commitment made, you lose the right to complain. And sure enough, if you are 100% committed to the process, resentment never arises. Whether you win or you lose, you did what you committed yourself fully to doing and that is enough to make you feel happy and content. If you feel less than happy, you should know you were not 100% committed to the process, and you were probably attached to a particular outcome.

Commitment is declaring to the world that you choose something with your mind, your soul and your heart. Importantly though, it is a moment by moment act of choosing. Only because you committed to something today, doesn't mean you have to commit to it again tomorrow. You can re-evaluate your commitment based on your instincts, intuition, logic, knowledge already gained and lessons already learnt. But until you make a new commitment, you need to stick to the commitment already made 100%. Remember, resentment can only creep in in the absence of full commitment. So don't be wishy-washy. Be committed, moment by moment, every step of the way. For commitment is the only thing that can save you from resentment and unhappiness.

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Developing Courage in Difficult Times

We don't develop courage by being happy every day. We develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. Our rough times often bring out the best in ourselves.

In my experience, people who have been through painful, difficult times are filled with compassion. In spite of adversity, those who are happiest seem to have a way of learning from difficult times, becoming stronger, wiser and happier as a result. Man is not made for defeat. It is true that man go through different phases in life. It's a part of living and existing. Sometimes we are devastated due to the loneliness and emptiness we feel inside but we need not lose hope.

Great men do not experience small challenges. They face great challenge but that is what makes them great. That is what give them great story. They live and leave distinctive footprints of life on minds

Courage is a choice that requires action. Give yourself credit. Use the same strength to make courageous choices today. Sometimes, making the wrong choice is better than making no choice. You have the courage to go forward; that is rare. I am not a courageous person by nature. But at a certain point in my life, I find the courage to leave my husband.

Finding the courage to stand where I fall allowed me to have perseverance in life. Or perhaps at times, it is a combination of spirit and desire, love and hope to know where to look without flinching. The only true measure of courage is perseverance under pressure.

Real courage is doing the right thing when nobody's looking. The key to life is accepting challenges. Be thankful to those painful memories of your life, because those what shaped you to become who you are now. Each mistake teaches you something new about yourself. There is no failure, remember, except in no longer trying. It is the courage to continue that counts. It can completely transform your life. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to live your life with integrity even in rough times.

You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. You will never do anything in this world without courage. It is the greatest quality of the mind, next to honor. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. Hold on to your power and never give it away.

That's what courage is. Starting again. Damning yesterday and facing tomorrow with your head held high.

This article is about survival. Even in difficult times, there is still hope to have a better future.

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Focusing on Love Versus Happiness

There are a lot of conversations these days that are focused on happiness. Happiness as a means of making significant successful changes in a person's life, and as the basis for building an ideal life on. If the job you are thinking of applying for doesn't make you happy then don't apply for it. Or if the person you are having a relationship with doesn't make you happy, then find someone who does to share your life with.

And this is all really great and definitely a good way to build an enjoyable life.

In fact, I really enjoy being happy. Living a life of happiness is so much better than living a life that is led by any other dominant emotion or vibration. One of the most important concepts (if not the most important concept) of the Law of Attraction is that the first thing everyone should do before they attempt any manifesting, is to get happy!!

But...

Happiness is just one emotion. As a human being I have a whole range of emotions that I fully appreciate and want to experience as they arise and are relevant to what is happening in my life.

Recently, a much loved member of the tribe of coaches that I belong to, passed away. The sadness and grief that was expressed by her friends, clients, and peer coaches was so strong it could easily be felt through the internet.

There was no happiness in this situation. No way to turn what had happened into something to rejoice or feel happy about. The only option, the best option in my perception, was to feel the grief and sadness until that grief and sadness was complete and decided to leave on its own. Anything less, any attempt to force happiness in a situation like this was unthinkable.

But what was also there, amidst the grief and pain and sadness of this huge loss, was a real feeling of love for someone who had touched so many lives in truly amazing ways.

And on the very day I had heard about this person's passing and was reading the messages with their outpourings of sadness and grief, I also saw this message from Rumi: "This is a subtle truth: whatever you love, you are." Yes, I do believe in synchronicity.

Happiness is an emotional response to what we do in our lives, to the actions, the experiences, the activities that make up our lives. And yes, the more actions, experiences and activities in our life that make us happy, the better our life will be.

But...

If, through all the actions, the experiences, and the activities that make up my life, including those that elicit the full range of human emotional responses I have, I can still feel love along with that emotion, then that's who I am, not just what I do, or what my life is like.

What if I built my life on things that I love, rather than on things that made me happy? The travel experience isn't something that makes me happy every single step of the way, but travel is something I love. Because travel something I love, then the parts of travel that make me frustrated, even angry, are all part of what makes travel so wildly awesome and lovable. And that is who I want to be. And that is the life I want to live and am working on building right now - on bringing into my life things that are so wildly awesome that I will love, unconditionally, every aspect of them - including the times when they don't make me feel happy.

Unconditional love and unconditional self-love is a love that goes way beyond happiness. Those are the activities, the experiences that I want to be. That I can experience a life full of unconditional love and unconditional self-love through even the deepest, most painful bouts of grief, or sadness, or fear, or frustration, well that's the wildly awesome life I'm looking for.

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Is Poverty a Virtue?

Poverty is the opposite of abundance. Abundance is a virtue. However, poverty is not a virtue, was never a virtue and will never be a virtue. Why? This is because a virtue is something that is beneficial to one self as well as to others. A virtue also stands the test of time. In other words, a virtue is valid in the past, in the present and also in the future.

Poverty is neither beneficial to oneself nor is it beneficial to others. Poverty causes hardship to one self. It leads to hunger, sickness, sense of injustice, anger and even violence. It also leads to a host of other negative repercussions and social problems, such as theft, violence and even war. So, it is also not beneficial to others and to society as a whole.

The other thing to note is that poverty is a state of mind, not physical appearance. Those who understand spirituality know that there is a huge difference between contentment and poverty.

Contentment is a state of mind where there is little desire for things or to possess things. Contentment is being happy or satisfied with what you already have. Whatever there is, it is enough. There is no fear of lack.

Poverty, on the other hand, is a state of mind where there is a sense of lack, of not enough, of inadequacy. Poverty is a manifestation of fear and is associated with a sense of insecurity.

Outwardly, both contentment and poverty may be seen as having few things and possessions, but contentment is happy with little while poverty is unhappy with the same.

Those who do not understand that poverty is a state of mind mistook poverty as a virtue simply because they compare the few things that ascetics and monks possess and the few things that poor people have, and then draw the wrong conclusion that poverty is good. They compare only the physical but not the mental state.

From here, we can now be clear that poverty is not a virtue, but contentment is. So, strive to be happy with what you have and to let go of the fear of lack or inadequacy. Strive to understand the source of your deepest fears and learn to overcome them. When you overcome your fears, you simultaneously overcome poverty in your mind.

Abundance comes about when the mind is free from the fear of lack.

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