Confidence, The Only Thing I Had Over Everyone Else (By Jonar Arpon)

"Confidence is 10% hard work and 90% Delusion."

-Tina Fey

Confidence

True story, planet Earth called me this morning, he said, "Jon I'm taking you on today, I want you to know that."

I was with a friend of mines and I told him

"The world wants to take me on today, you know what to do."

He went to the closet

He pulled out a rope and I put both hands behind my back, and he held the phone to my ear and I told him "the world wants to take me on today? I got both hands tied behind my back, now it's even, Try me."

Confidence

I don't care about anything at all, I'll take it on with confidence. It's the one thing that I've always had. It wasn't always like that.

A long time ago, I couldn't even look anyone in the eye. I walked around as a child with my head down, when someone spoke to me I was scared to look them in the eyes. I don't know what it was but that's what it was.

I came from a private school, but my family couldn't afford it anymore so they put me in public school in 5th grade. I went to public school and they thought because I went to a private school I was very smart so they put me in the smartest classes in public school.

They quickly learned I've had F's my whole life. It was too hard, I couldn't grasp anything they were teaching me. I felt alienated and stupid because the class was so hard. Even to this day, I don't even know how to multiply decimals let alone how to do fractions. So I was having a real hard time. They moved me to the dumb class and I still got an F.

I don't think it was because I was dumb or anything but I couldn't learn how they taught me. I didn't learn the same way other kids did at all. I found out very quick academically I was stupid but socially I was a genius.

The school system put a crutch in my head that I was good for nothing because I couldn't learn like the other kids. I was always in the "dumb" class. And the dumb kids were the bottom of the barrel in society.

But something amazing happened

It's like blind people, because they don't have sight they excel greatly in hearing. I happened to be bad at learning in that environment but I excelled greatly in communication skills, building loyalty among peers and leadership. Also confidence, I was the dumbest most confident person in school.

I don't know why?

But it's borderline delusional actually, I don't get it, I'm very socially calibrated, I'm very emotionally intelligent and can actually cold-read a person and tell them about themselves. But I don't know how to divide.

Here's why I don't feel like that's important. Because every great out there was a great communicator. I'm not going to take a pop quiz and if I fail I lose out on everything. No, the challenges I receive in life is how many hits to the face can I take and keep going? How many strategies can I come up with to continue trying while getting tuning my approach with every rejection I face.

Can I still be confident when my loans get pushed out or drop?

Those are the types of pop quiz's life gives you, it gives you a beating and you need the confidence to pull yourself out of it.

Remember guys, exude confidence and take on the entire world.

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Improve Your Communication Skills - Subliminal Binaural Beats Meditation

Put Your Creative Talents to the Test

There is no doubt exhibition designers are creative and motivated. They tackle tough jobs, tight deadlines, and continue to come up with new concepts. They learn about market trends, narrow down specific target audiences, and listen to the needs of those they work for. They strive to create a campaign that offers value on every level.

Some make it look very easy, but exhibition designers have a tough job to tackle. They can take simple conversations and turn them into visual aids. They can help any business owner walk through the process of getting ideas in motion. Don't worry if you show up without much direction on what you want or need. Talking to them can get it all moving along smoothly.

Communication

In addition to being creative, exhibition designers need to have excellent communication skills. They need to listen, ask questions, and share information. The wrong conceptions being formulated through such discussions can put a hold on everything. They can delay outcomes, waste resources, and leave everyone involved uneasy.

This is why the foundation has to be in place with efficient communication. If you aren't sure what to share with them, show them images, tell them what you like, tell them what you don't. Explain to them what you want to share with customers and how you plan to gain new consumers. Express what you feel competitors have to offer that you lack at this point in time.

Unique Ventures

Those who excellent as exhibition designers offer something unique and specific to each of their customers. They don't have a vague idea that they slightly tweak for different types of businesses out there. Instead, they go the extra mile and take on that role of helping the business to get themselves seen out there. This is a great way to build a reputation and gain future business.

They offer a unique opportunity for each business they work with, and that is what helps them to grow their own reputation. They continue to explore new ideas and to beyond set boundaries. They use the technology and techniques available to make better looking materials in the least amount of time.

It is fascinating to see the ideas go from discussions to paper, to being put into a computer system. From there, they are created, printed, and put on display. The concepts continue to get better and better all the time too - thanks to advances in technology. Getting more overall value for the investment is appealing to business owners.

Results that Count

While most exhibition designers never see the outcome of those efforts, they do hear about them! Business owners notice the increase it brings to them in terms of traffic. Most of the time, that also means more sales for them. They often reach out to the provider and thank them for a remarkable outcome.

They also share feedback with others because they want to convey a message that the exhibition designers they worked with did an amazing job. Getting these types of results can be done for an affordable cost too. You shouldn't be investing a small fortune for this type of marketing. Instead, it should work well for you and also fit into your allocated budget.

Take the time to find providers and to ask about the services they offer. Check out previous work they have done too. This will help you feel confident they have what it takes to get your needs met with ease. Be involved with that process from start to finish. This will make it easier for any changes to be done along the way if necessary.

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3 Keys to Learning Positive Intrapersonal Communications (By Latonia Price)

I know the idea of 'talking to yourself' seems ridiculous. However, in today's time, it's absolutely necessary to have great intrapersonal communication skills. These skills aren't necessarily about being conceited or selfish. It's more about being able to face reality with a more calm and level mindset. Here are 3 keys that I believe helps to improve intrapersonal communication skills:

1. Don't be ashamed to talk to yourself. I am not ashamed to admit I talk to myself. I ask myself serious and/or simple questions every day that centers on my attitude, love for myself, love for God, love for my husband, love for other people, and so much more. Most times, I don't answer certain questions right away because I want to wait to see if the answer will come from God. But because I asked myself a question and God knows what I asked, He'll answer. That's why I have no shame because most answers come from God. I may give an answer to some of the simple questions but for more of those serious questions, it's a few days or weeks because I want to make sure God answers and not myself. If I answer, I may not end up with the best solution. If I give room for God to answer, I am more likely to follow the right solution.

2. Have daily, consistent reflection time. Since the start of 2018, I've been doing tons of self-reflection. I've been telling people how I spend so much time in the mirror nowadays. Not sounding conceited but being transparent and sharing the fact that I need help. I need God, I need my husband, I need my family, I need trustworthy friends, etc. I'm not perfect. I love to learn and I have a lot of knowledge. However, I still need God to supply all my needs according to His riches in glory. (Phil. 4:19) I still need protection, love, support, healthy food, decent clothes, etc. I can't survive without God and what He supplies.

3. Break limiting beliefs through thanksgiving. Each person has an idea of who they are. Most are quick to recognize their weaknesses but so many are slow to recognize their strengths. It's easy to recognize a strength with a well-known public figure because that's all the media will show. But nowadays, the truth is coming forth and recognizing that even the they have flaws. We have to break these limiting beliefs by being so thankful for what we do have! Don't take what you have for granted. Don't doubt yourself by comparing yourself to others. It's not worth comparing or competing. Be grateful for how God made you.

Love yourself enough to talk to yourself. Improve your intrapersonal communication skills. You may find it so easy to encourage others but take more time to encourage yourself. Believe me, you'll reap the benefits over and over again!

http://ezinearticles.com/?3-Keys-to-Learning-Positive-Intrapersonal-Communications&id=9987574

Perfect Communication Skills - How To Perfectly Understand Another Person

A monologue is basically one person talking to themselves.

A dialogue is often two people, talking to themselves.

If you are having a disagreement to any degree, it is because you are taking the discussion or topic of what the other person is saying in some way related to you, either how it affects you, what you think you would do, the way you feel about it, or how you interpret it.

Not only in disagreements, but in every normal conversation, this is how we communicate because this is how our mind works, always relating everything to our own individual self. It stems from the animal instinct for survival and makes us view everything based on if it helps or hurts us in some way. This is a deeply subconscious fact of the human mind and personality.

Every interaction is filtered through a tie to your involvement or how it affects you in some way, about you, and never 100% about that person and their life.

To eliminate any level or degree of disagreement, you must see the discussion or what the person is saying, 100% from their point of view in relation to their life. Then you will understand what they are really saying.

The cause of misunderstanding is entirely because you are not listening with a pure, open mind and heart, that is entirely free of your own self-interests, and your own opinions.

If you could rid yourself of that way of listening, then you will never have a disagreement and all your conversations will be fluid, positive, and always lead to the best possible outcome.

Maybe not all perfect but at least better than they are now because it is going to be very hard to meet someone else who can understand and has mastered this principle. In order for conversations and the sharing of thoughts and feelings to be perfectly communicated, it takes both people to be this way.

This is easy to prove when you observe how frustrated you are when you talk to someone who does not understand you. You know that this is true, because when you are trying to explain yourself to someone who does not understand you, you know how frustrated you feel. If you cannot master this method of communication, and you try to get another person to do it, they will obviously never be able to do it either.

It begins with you, when you have altered your way of communicating, of listening, and you show another person through your example what you are like, and when they experience having a conversation to which they are truly understood, without any arguments, contradictions or conflicts, only then will that person have an opportunity to experience this way of talking to someone, this type of discussion.

Only then will they perhaps ask you to teach them how or will this new experience touch them in a way that they realize this is something good for them to learn.

Let us take this principle beyond simple communication skills and integrate it as a key factor in our emotional balance and freedom with one simple thought. How often do you feel a little hopeless or depressed by the thought that no one really understands you, and that makes you feel very alone.

Perhaps our feeling of aloneness would be alleviated if we could find anyone who could communicate in this way and truly, deeply understand what you are saying and therefore how you feel at any given moment.

Because on the surface level of conversation we cannot even get simple basic concepts across, we will certainly never speak about things that are important and deep in our heart, our true values of life. On a deeper emotional level we shut down and lose hope of being truly understood and attaining that deep connection with another person that every human being needs to feel safe and relaxed in their life.

My suggestion is that since finding a person like that is very difficult, let us all at least start becoming that person for other people. Hopefully, if this catches on, eventually you will meet someone who has also changed the way they are for the sake of a another person and you may just get lucky to find someone you can feel comfortable enough to truly open up to.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Perfect-Communication-Skills---How-To-Perfectly-Understand-Another-Person&id=8548217

From Introvert to Effective Communicator

I had been an Introvert all my school and college life. And always wanted to make friends, have Fun. I remember the days where I used to sit at a desk alone because there were no friends of mine.

And pretty soon when I came in the corporate job (indeed to get a Job I needed to be good at my communication skill) I needed communication skill to succeed. So how did I transform myself from being an Introvert to and Effective Communicator? It was a Big change (Or I thought I was big).

"By changing nothing, nothing changes". - Tony Robbins

Step 1. Accepting there is a need to Change

We look for solutions only when we have identified the problem. I had identified my problem which was been introvert. And I had willingness to change it (that is very important).

Step 2. Finding the Tools

Being an Engineer I know the importance of tools (Resources ), Tools are designed for a specific function. I used 3 tools:

A. Books - Someone said "Books are your best friend" and I agree with that. I wanted to become a good communicator so I started reading books like "How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie","Skill with people","Everybody communicates few connect by John Maxwell " these are few of the references. The best thing I can think about is a TED talk by Tae in which he talks about the importance of books http://youtu.be/7bB_fVDlvhc. You will get practical ideas and motivation to go out and make new friends, overcome your challenge.

B. Association - "We become whom we associate". Association has become one of the most important catalyst in my success from an Introvert to an Effective Communicator. Let me give you an example of Association, Imagine you have been asked to ride a one wheeled bike, If you haven't been in circus previous then you would be scared right. If the same question is asked to you in a Park where lot of normal people just like you are happily riding a single wheeled bike comfortably. All are enjoying riding that, what will your mind think now? Yes, if they can do it you can also do it. Same applies to communication, join a local toastmasters club or any speakers club, you will associated with good communicators who will inspire you to become better at communication. And also you will make new friends (don't worry, they will only talk to you first).

C. Mentor - Find a Mentor who is genuinely interested in helping you get better and get regular feedback. And be ready for the changes advised by the mentor.

Step 3.PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE Perseverance is the key at becoming better at any craft. Consistency and persistence will make you a great communicator. Do you know the difference between Amateur and Pro? It is the number of hours of Practice. That's it. Period.

I would like to End this post by one of my favourite quotes by Robin Sharma

"Change is Hard in the Beginning

Messy in the Middle and

Gorgeous at the End".

http://ezinearticles.com/?From-Introvert-to-Effective-Communicator&id=9644748

An Introduction of Yourself

"Tell me something about yourself", this question is very common still most unanswered or not responded clearly by an individual. It is truly said that no one can know you better than yourself but when it comes to describe yourself in front of others so that they may know you better why most of us are left with a blank option basically in an interview especially for the fresher's applying for their first job.

Way of introduction may be different from place to place or person to person. Introducing yourself in parties or meetings is far different way than introducing yourself in a job interview. You are more comfortable to introduce yourself in parties or meetings as there is an informal way to introduce yourself so, you successfully manage to do so as there is no chances of mistake but when it comes to any job interview then most of us start fumbling with our words especially when we start our introduction in "English". But it is necessary that one must be really careful and professional in their words and action while introducing oneself in professional interview.

Why does this awkward situation occurs in most of our lives? I may be either due to lack of confidence or due to lack of good communication skills. It could be improved by you yourself. Speak to yourself daily about you, find a proper way to present yourself in front of others, take a note of different things which you would include while presenting yourself. Be concise with your introduction as no one will be interested in listening a story of yourself. Be calculative enough to choose the words which we are using to describe ourselves.Using positive words such as enthusiastic,innovative,creative,self motivated and so on which would help in enhancing your personality. But do not forget to include your drawbacks also. It is not mandatory to include all your drawbacks but yes it is good to include it with a positive outlook so that your drawback or weakness may not unveil your personality with a negative image. Present yourself with a skillful and expertise image so that all your weakness may get overlapped by strengths.

Confidence and positive attitude is more than enough for a person to show his/her impressive personality. Greeting someone with a positive attitude will leave a positive impression of oneself on the other no matter what. Build up your personality by yourself or by getting trained via different personality development training classes and achieve success in every field you want.

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How Do You Make A Difference? (By Shirley Taylor)

I'm a big believer in lifelong learning, and I feel something that we must never stop continuously improving is our communication skills. The way we communicate can often mean the difference between success and failure in getting a job done, building or busting a relationship, making or breaking a friendship, or indeed getting that promotion!

"Good morning" makes a difference!

I remember one morning quite early I met my two assistants for a training programme. Just as the lift door was closing on the ground floor, a guy rushed into the lift. He did not acknowledge us, turned around, and pressed a button. I then said, much more cheerfully than I felt, "Good morning!" This guy almost jumped out of his skin, but he half-turned towards me and nodded his head. When the lift approached his floor, he walked out, and after three steps he turned around, smiled, and said, "Have a great day!"

Wow! Bingo! Two things happened here. Even though it was early and I wasn't feeling particularly cheerful at that moment, I did something that made a positive difference to the guy in the lift. And he also made a positive difference to me and my assistants. And who knows who else he acknowledged or spoke to for the rest of the day to continue making a difference to others.

A smile and a kind word makes a difference!

This incident reminded me of something that had happened several months ago when I was training overseas with a colleague, Marianna Pascal. Marianna and I were waiting for the lift to head down to breakfast. As the lift doors opened to reveal about 8 or 9 people, Marianna walked in, smiling broadly, and said, "Good morning everyone!" Well you can imagine the shocked faces! But what happened next was magical. Marianna and I did not immediately turn our backs to the others. We stayed facing them, and we started chatting. Everyone started smiling and chatting back. Where are you from? How long are you here? What convention are you attending? Which of the sights did you enjoy the most? By the time we all got down to the main floor, we were all laughing and having a great time.

Did we make a positive difference to these people? We certainly did! Did we make a difference to their day? Absolutely! And who knows how many of those people subsequently went on to do something similar to make a positive difference to other people's days.

How do YOU make a difference?

Whether you think you do or don't, trust me, you do make a difference! However, sometimes it's not always positive. And trust me, when you make a negative difference, people will remember you - but for all the wrong reasons!

It's not hard to make a positive difference. Sometimes all it takes is a smile or a kind word.

So how will you make a positive difference today? I'd love to hear from you!

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-Do-You-Make-A-Difference?&id=9739560

Developing Personality Through Personality Development Courses

A good personality development course will allow the person to have a much-sophisticated behavior, and this will also enable him to connect with others much more efficiently. This will lead to the individual having numerous benefits. It allows you to explore a different aspect to your personality. The results might not be immediate with time you will start seeing the benefits.

Advancement in personality

One of the main advantages of this course is the overall advancement that it brings to an individual's personality. The individual will seem more vibrant and charming. This is better his prospects at the workplace and also, help the person advance his career.

Better confidence

A good personality development course will assist the individual boost his confidence and morale. Most people suffer from a lack of confidence, and this limits their prospects. Having the right amount of confidence is paramount for anyone wanting make long strides in the course of his career.

Create a healthy rapport

A good personality development course will also enable the person to form a healthy rapport with people from any age bracket.

Better communication skills

Effective communication is one of the perks of having a great personality. It is crucial to be able to articulate your thoughts well and have a certain clarity in your communication. This and much more is achieved indulging in personality development on a regular basis. With an enhanced communication skill, you will have better prospects in your professional as well as your personal life. The confidence and the effective communication helps you communicate much more efficiently whatever it is that you want to communicate.

Makes you approachable

One of the best aspects of having a great personality is that people find it easy to approach you. An excellent personality enables you to look good, communicate effectively and behave in an appropriate manner. This makes it easy for people to get into a conversation with you. And, that can open new doors for you.

With personality development course positive results will be in plenty and there are no disadvantages. It is important that opt for a good course that will allow you to gain better insight into your personality. The primary objective of a personality development course is to help you explore your real self and evolve. On a whole personality development course will enable the person to have an edge in every way over his counterparts. It will also help the person develop a warm outlook on life.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Developing-Personality-Through-Personality-Development-Courses&id=9374628

It's Only Words

Words are power tools in our box of life skills. They can enslave or free us and even set us on fire! That's powerful; when something so innocuous can carry enough force to shape the future of other people it's important to understand how to use them. Sometimes it isn't even the words so much as how you say them; meanings change based on the emphasis behind them. Look at how things change with these two simple words; pret-ty good or pretty good! One implies things could get way better while the other says things are great, yet they are exactly the same words. The meaning behind them is as important as the words themselves.

Words that enslave us tap into inner fears. These are words that are intended to tear us down or make us feel bad about ourselves. They are the bullying words of 'You're stupid, ugly, fat, undesirable... ' they are the words that make adults cringe and run back to the dark to hide from the pain. They are the same words that destroy the foundation of children rendering them incapable of loving themselves or life. These words spring form the darkest part of humanity typically flung at us from someone who feels very threatened by us for no obvious reason.

Words that free us originate from a loving acceptance that encourages us to press on, to believe in ourselves and our dreams. They are the words of hope; they heal, uplift and inspire us. They frequently form a launch pad to greater accomplishments. When words free us they are providing answers and assurances about something we did not understand or doubted. They prompt us to believe in what we felt was truth.

Words that set us on fire touch the deepest parts of our emotions; some fear based inspiring anger and some faith-based. The faith-based affirm something that matters deeply to us, many times generating new ideas that allow us to pursue a dream we have held tightly to. When words inspire creativity or hope they connect with the place where we have faith in the goal. Those that cause fear touch the place where we hide what we believe is deficient in us.

They are all only words; how valuable are they? Consider that communication skills are at the top of the list for those who are charged with making decisions about hiring and granting salary increases and promotions. They are the basis of every summary about who a person was in life, because they defined who they were. It's only words, but they can create so many different conclusions in the lives we touch.

If you are unsure about how you want to say something, decide what effect you want to achieve and then you will know which words to use and how to say them. Your words will determine how you'll be remembered; they become a part of the legacy of your life.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Its-Only-Words&id=9710691

Your Heart Got Hijacked? Take It Back

When a man got the "Dear John" treatment from his girlfriend recently, his Fitbit tracked his heartbreak, a dramatic and oh-so-21st century snapshot of what happens to your physical heart when your emotional heart gets trashed.

Indeed, not only do your emotions suffer when you get bad news, or are for whatever reason distressed, angry, fearful-your heart, your cardiovascular system, feels the hurt. Literally. Something scientists have proven repeatedly, study after study.

But here's the thing: when your heart gets hijacked by something bad happening-usually unexpected, you can get it back into a healthier place, and in the process, soothe yourself into a better place.

Why does this matter? Because over time, letting negative feelings yank your heart rate around damages your cardiovascular system. It's not good for your physical well-being for your heart to perform in "fight or flight" mode-which is what it does when you get angry, upset or frightened-over long periods of time. In a sense, it wears your heart down, which impacts all sorts of other bodily functions, as well as your potential longevity.

Not to mention the toll it's taking on your everyday happiness quotient.

Get your heart back! All it takes is a dose of appreciation. I know, that sounds like so much hooey! And certainly, I don't mean appreciate the heartbreak... puh-leeze.

Appreciate that you have friends or family you can talk to, people in your life who value and love you, and who are there to support you through whatever. That you have a cat/dog/iguana/canary who loves you regardless of what your Heartbreaking Other thinks of you. That there are "broken hearts" resources all over the web, in addition to counselors, pastors and others who can be powerful supports.

Appreciate whatever it is that you can learn from this experience. Believe me, there's always something to learn. Whether it's to set better boundaries, get better at asking for what you want and need, becoming a better listener-there's always "better" to be had.

And what about the little things? The daily hassles such as the driver who cut you off. The fifteen times you had to drive around the parking lot to find a space. The alarm that failed to go off and made you late for that oh-so-important appointment. Your boss passing you over for that promotion you know you deserve. The 1000th time you had that same argument with your mother/spouse/child. Need I go on?

Your irritation, frustration and annoyance won't hijack your heart like the big things, but the little things wear on you too. Recent research shows that the more you react negatively to everyday stuff, the more likely you are to have a psychological disorder a decade later. Yikes! And with that, there's increased potential for your physical well-being to be impacted as well.

Be good to yourself. Work on appreciating whatever you can in the situation: the driver cut you off, but all is well, no accident. You had to park far: walking is good for you. The alarm failed: appreciate that you can re-schedule the appointment, and can get a new alarm so that doesn't happen again. You didn't get the promotion: appreciate the opportunity to learn why and can take measures accordingly. That argument? Appreciate that you can learn new communication skills and resolve your argument once and for all.

Yes, it takes some effort, and I agree, the pity-party can be oh-so-satisfying. But in the long run, learning to appreciate, release and let go as soon as you can, will benefit both your physical and emotional heart.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Your-Heart-Got-Hijacked?-Take-It-Back&id=9363117

How To Upgrade And Enhance Your Professional Development Plan

Your professional development plan should not be boring. In fact, it should be making you feel eager and excited. This plan will help you develop the skills you need to thrive and excel in the workplace. It will also make you a standout employee in nearly every commercial environment. Following are a few ways to ramp these efforts up for increased enjoyment and greater benefits.

A lot of people think that their training always has to be industry-specific. Unless your employer has strict requirements that you must adhere to, you have unlimited options in learning to choose from. This means that you can start participating in instruction that you actually like and that also moves you a bit closer to your own personal goals.

Sign up to learn a new language. Not only will this add value to your CV, but it will also increase your ability to engage with foreign clients. Choose a language that is commonly used in your current work environment. In addition to becoming a fluent speaker, make sure that you develop strong, bi-lingual writing skills as well. This is known as being bi-literate and it can increase your professional value many times over.

Think about getting your license to perform a service that your company usually outsources. This could save your employer a hefty sum of cash. This is also a great way to prime yourself for promotion. Just make sure that you are fully certified before the position you want becomes available.

Look for a diverse range of training opportunities as this will make your professional profile more appealing to prospective employers. Veering outside of the norm will set you apart from the colleagues that you are currently competing with in your field. It will additionally give you the ability to supply more services and solve more problems for any company that you work for.

Take a writing class to improve your written communication skills. Do not be afraid to experiment with different writing types as all of these can benefit your ability to draft impressive letters and word yourself in a formal and appealing way. You may even be able to help your company maintain its professional blog once you have complete a creative writing workshop.

Learn stress management skills by attending a special seminar and retreat. Not only do your employers want you to be adept in managing their operations, but they'll also want you to know how to continue functioning well in tense and stressful situations. Not only will you learn how to control negative and unpleasant emotions while you're away, but you're virtually guaranteed to have some fun in the process.

Start learning web design skills, even if your current employer isn't in the technology industry. This will give you the ability to troubleshoot website problems and make informed selections on how to improve company web pages. SQL training courses, CSS and HTML classes will all make you infinitely more valuable in every professional role you fill. Courses like these are always worth the necessary investment of money and time.

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Upgrade-And-Enhance-Your-Professional-Development-Plan&id=9384578

Nagging Ladies - Reasons Why You Need to Lay Off the Little Things

Everybody hates a nagger; and no matter what you do, those frustrating little things are simply inevitable. So every time you feel like losing your temper, be reminded of all these reasons to dismiss the urge to blabber.

1. It causes stress

Magnifying the petty things is one of the common reasons why we easily get stressed. The emotions and energy that are being used in complaining and chattering drains out our strength and weakens our immune system. Stress, especially when prolonged, is totally harmful to our health, thus, we should dodge any situation that could trigger it.

2. You're not right, you're just angry

In most cases, the sudden influx of strong emotion loses our sense of rationality. Sometimes, we babble over something not because it is truly of importance, but simply because we are being carried away by our emotions. So ladies, think many times over before reacting to something that doesn't look or sound right, so you won't seem like a mindless chatterer.

3. Not only it is ineffective, it also erodes love

When you stress yourself over something of little value, there is a very big possibility that you will only get ignored. Getting ignored then leads you to flare up, and out of your anger comes ugly and hurtful words. You should know that you can never get what you want by constantly repeating yourself. That will simply make people get annoyed by you, or worse, hate you. The trick is to start a mindful conversation.

4. Nagging only justifies the want to counter-complain

Complaining about the little things and repeating it over and over again until something happens never does any good. Instead, it only opens up a room for arguments. Again, you can never get what you want by blabbering. Everything you will say will only sound gibberish to anyone who hears it, and they will most likely not listen to you. Address the problem by its roots, say it one time, and make no room for counter-complains.

5. Nagging can be more toxic than infidelity

If you think cheating or physical abuse can only be the reasons for creating a toxic relationship, think again. A nagging wife or girlfriend can equal in toxicity with the two previously mentioned predicaments. A woman who stresses over petty things, magnifies them, and frequently blabber has no difference with a man who sleeps secretly with another woman.

If somebody had told you to stop nagging, listen. Listen before any of your relationships gets ruined. Nagging, blabbering, chattering, whatever you call it, is a sign of poor communication skills.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Nagging-Ladies---Reasons-Why-You-Need-to-Lay-Off-the-Little-Things&id=9434809

The 10 Principles of Self-Made Billionaires

Billionaires have something most of us don’t.

But that’s only because we haven’t learned it yet.

I’ve spent a significant amount of time with billionaires. I’ve studied them extensively, and here’s what I’ve discovered: Billionaires are billionaires because they all follow a set of unique perspectives, or principles, that help them persevere where others find challenges.

I call these 10 principles “The Billionaires’ Success Framework.”

Principle 1: Simplicity of Purpose

Billionaires are billionaires because when they went about building an empire, they were hyper-focused on a specific objective. All their effort and energy was dedicated to pursuing that clearly defined purpose. For example:

• Henry Ford wanted to democratize the automobile—to make it available to everyone.
• Bill Gates wanted to put a PC inside every home in America.
• Steve Jobs wanted to put the power of a computer inside a phone (and make it painfully easy to use).

When we look at the whole of these goals, they seem massive, imposing, and yet they can all be stated in a single, easy-to-understand sentence.

Principle 2: Simplicity of Plan

Billionaires are not known for having highly detailed, highly elaborate plans.

Herb Kelleher, founder of the legendary low-cost people-mover Southwest Airlines, didn’t use complicated numbers or ingenious technical secrets to turn the airline industry on its head. His plan for Southwest followed three tenets:

• Get the wheels up and get the wheels down.
• Have fun.
• Embrace being the “low-cost” airline.

These painfully simple tenets are the foundation of the most profitable airline in the history of the aviation industry. Keeping things simple helps all employees—not just key leaders—focus on the activities that will be most impactful to the success of the company.

Principle 3: Limit What You Tolerate

Billionaires limit what they tolerate—it sounds callous but it’s actually brilliant.

Billionaires don’t cultivate success from their wants; they extract it from the world by limiting what they’ll tolerate.

• They don’t tolerate incompetent or unhelpful people.
• They don’t tolerate an absence of results.
• They don’t tolerate social pressures—they’re willing to embrace the isolation, solitude and suffering it takes to build something truly great.

Billionaires are the 1 percent of people who tolerate what 99 percent of us avoid, and generally avoid what 99 percent of us tolerate. They are constantly optimizing their lives. They are asking themselves on a daily basis, Where’s the operational drag in my life? What can I get rid of today to make tomorrow better?

Billionaires identify and purge without hesitation—that’s why they’re creating the greatest outcomes in the world.

Principle 4: Absolute Reliance on People

Billionaires don’t just occasionally lean on other people; they absolutely rely on them to make it through each day. From personal assistants to the members of the board, billionaires cultivate fantastic professional relationships so they can rely on them when they need it most.

Here’s why: No single individual could create the leverage and momentum necessary to create billions of dollars in value. It’s the billionaire who asks for and offers protection and support, because they know that entrepreneurs accomplish almost nothing alone, and we all move forward faster together.

Principle 5: Absolute Dedication to People

Due, in part, to their reliance on other people, billionaires are also obsessively dedicated to people; this includes customers and investors, but especially employees and their close teams.

This kind of obsession can manifest itself in a variety of ways—some billionaires are obsessed with creating the absolutely perfect product, some are obsessed with spreading success and wealth throughout the world. But it’s all ultimately about people.

• Bill Gates, feared early in his career for his fierce temper, learned to become a strong and valued mentor for top leaders at Microsoft.
• Warren Buffett created one of the greatest fortunes and business empires in history, but only after he recognized the need to develop great leaders and keep them close.

And when it comes to the people who create leverage for billionaires, this dedication is absolute and unshakable. The important people in a billionaire’s life—from founding partners to their assistants—are always taken care of and usually asked to stay involved in their lives for a long time.

Principle 6: Rely on Communications Systems

Everyone knows that for your business to succeed, clear communication is essential. But over the years, I’ve had the chance to meet with many successful entrepreneurs and most of them share a surprising trait: They have trouble communicating. In fact, billionaires, the most successful entrepreneurs, tend to have the greatest difficulty.

But they succeed because they rely exclusively on communications systems, not their own communications skills. All billionaires create ways to accurately track progress, measure results and optimize performance. They understand the importance of being able to gain perspective through context, and they use systematic communication methods that are consistent and reliable.

By doing this, they can fill in the gaps where their own abilities are lacking, and create momentum.

Principle 7: Require Push Communications

I can’t state this clearly enough: Billionaires require push communications.

They don’t wait around for someone to communicate with them. They don’t go around seeking the information they need, researching their answers for hours. Billionaires expect their information to be curated, concise and delivered directly to them without having to ask. This is what they require from their teams.

People who are worth billions didn’t get that way by miring themselves with insignificant or impertinent information—they know exactly what they need to see and when they need to see it. The people who are responsible for creating momentum in a billionaire’s world are required to communicate this information without being asked. They are proactively pushing key information to the top of the to-do pile each and every day so the billionaire knows where to invest his time, energy, etc.

Principle 8: Be Intentional With What You Consume

Consumption in the absence of intention is waste.

Billionaires are incredibly intentional with their consumption of resources, and no resource is more thoughtfully consumed than information. Typically the information they need is relevant to a highly specific issue or decision. If there isn’t a need, billionaires tend to ignore the information.

If information isn’t moving you forward to where you want to be, it’s bogging you down. Billionaires know this, and you should, too.

Principle 9: Make Decisions Based on Data and Narrative

Billionaires don’t gamble—they make their decisions based on a blend of data and narrative. Why? Because they know the value of dual perspectives—one rooted in numbers and the other rooted in people.

If they relied solely on data, then a single mistake—a fudged number, an incorrectly recorded data point—could dramatically skew their ability to make the right decision. If they relied solely on narrative, their reasoning would be subject to swings in popularity or sentiment, and they’d be making decisions without anything objective backing it up.

Only by analyzing the data and having in-depth conversations with the right people can billionaires grasp enough of the picture to make a quality decision.

Principle 10: Be Proactively Transparent

Many people think of transparency as being a willingness to answer questions. But what separates billionaires from most people is their ability to be proactively transparent.

Billionaires proactively communicate with intention to avoid misunderstandings and eliminate any type of drag on their organization. They know that vague goals and an unclear purpose can stop momentum in its tracks, so they don’t wait for people to approach them with questions. They understand the importance of actively showing up and sharing what they need with the people around them.

Proactive transparency is vital because it ensures that teams understand outcomes and remain on the same page. It also increases confidence in leadership by eliminating any hint that something is being held back. A lack of transparency only increases pressure and noise for billionaires, and makes it difficult to create the outcomes they want.

No matter the experience or business size, the self-made billionaire’s framework includes lessons all entrepreneurs can integrate to build high-growth businesses… and build businesses around themselves.

http://www.success.com/blog/the-10-principles-of-self-made-billionaires

What We Want Most From Relationships (But Rarely Get)

Most couples come to see me to learn better communication skills—or at least that’s what they say in the first session. What gets described as communication problems, however, are in fact usually listening problems.

The truth is, we’re not very good listeners; we don’t know (and are not taught) how to listen to each other, at least not in a manner that truly nourishes us on a deep and spiritual level, and makes us feel heard, understood, or loved. We know how to listen from the head, but not from the heart. 

And yet being deeply listened to is the experience that human beings most crave and need. 

If there is one ingredient that determines whether or not a relationship will be successful, that ingredient is listening—the degree to which each partner feels listened to and truly known. Couples that can listen to each other in a satisfying way usually succeed, while those that can’t usually fail. Ultimately, we can only feel loved to the degree that we feel listened to.

I recently had a session with "Jon" and "Joan" (not their real names). Joan began by saying that she felt her experience could never be “just heard” by Jon—listened to and absorbed, without any interpretation, solution, judgment, defense or attack. She described how Jon was unable to hold a space for or really be with what she was living—without doing something with it or to it. Jon responded that holding a space for her feelings was not something that should be expected of him. Her request was unreasonable in his eyes, because a husband should not have to sit by silently and listen to what his wife is not receiving in the relationship—not without speaking up for himself, expressing his opinion, and providing some explanation. He then told his wife that what she really wanted (whether she knew it or not) was to control the relationship, the interaction—and him, as she "always did." Joan, without responding to his interpretation, repeated the same yearning—to be listened to with simple openness and non-judgment. Jon responded to this second attempt by telling Joan that her experience was false, that he did in fact listen to and hear her, even if she couldn’t feel it, and that she should examine why she couldn’t feel his kindness and interest. Joan then repeated her longing one more time, almost verbatim. This time Jon’s response was to express how totally alone he feels in the relationship, and how Joan has no interest in hearing what is truly important to him. 

From there, we began the work, in learning how to listen.

What happened between Joan and Jon is not gender specific nor is it specific to romantic relationships. What this couple demonstrated is a human problem: We constantly reject each other’s experience. It’s what we are taught to do. Listening to Joan that day, I felt as if I were watching an airplane desperately trying to find a place to land. Rejected by all control towers, her experience was to be left floating, unheard, unloved, with nowhere to touch down, nowhere to be welcomed home, no place to just be.

We all live this suffering daily, left with our own orphaned experience to nurture and land for ourselves. Yesterday I finished a particularly challenging and heartbreaking session in my office. Coming home, carrying a deep well of unprocessed feelings about what I had just lived, I entered my home to find my babysitter in a tiff. Before I had put my keys down, she was unloading her anger on me because my daughter would not eat her pasta. And just like that, my experience, what I was holding so profoundly in that moment, had to be put away to attend to the situation at hand. Life is always doing this to us, asking us to move from one experience to another without the processing, the landing, or the care and attention that we really crave—and need.

While we are conditioned to present our experience to others with a “What should I do about this?” as a way to include the other person (and hence earn their ear), most of the time we don’t really want to know what they think we should do about an issue, how to fix it, what’s wrong with us, why we shouldn’t feel what we feel, or anything else. We have probably already been inundated with countless well-intentioned and wise suggestions, from others and ourselves, on what we should do about our experience, and why we are having it. We already know all this. The problem, really, is that what we are asking for is not what we actually want, but rather what we have been conditioned to believe we are allowed to ask for. We don’t really long for anything to be done with or about our experience. Really, we just want our experience to be heard, listened to, understood, and cared about. We want someone to know how it is for us in this moment, in this life, and to keep us company in our experience—exactly as it is. What we want is for our experience to get to just be, without having to change into something else. 

The hardest thing in the world (or one of them anyway) is to listen to someone we care about (and even someone we don’t) talk about an experience that sounds painful—andnot step in to help, offer suggestions, or try to fix it. The second-hardest (not necessarily in this order) is to listen to someone describe a problem that they (or we) believe we are responsible for—and not defend ourselves. And rounding out this trio is to listen to someone describe a problem for which we believe they are to blame and have created, and not try to convince them of their responsibility. 

Counterintuitive though it may feel, simply (but not easily) offering our compassionate presence to another human being—being willing to truly understand what the other is living, and selfless enough to get out of the way of their unfolding process—we are actually offering the greatest gift we can—and the experience that we all really crave. While we may believe that we are not giving enough, we are actually giving the very thing the other person wants, but is not allowed to say they want. By seemingly doingnothing (but truly listening), we are allowing the other to discover what they need to discover, creating and holding the space in which their problem can uncover its own solution (which is rarely anything we could have come up with). Experience teaches us to trust the profoundly transformative and healing power of being with—holding a space for another person’s experience. By being willing and courageous enough to do nothing with and to another’s experience, we are actually doing the most profound thing of all.

In addition, while it can be very difficult to refrain from defending ourselves when we feel we are being blamed (or are to blame), by simply holding a space for another’s unhappiness, we establish ourselves as one who authentically cares, who wants to and is brave enough to know the other’s experience (even if it is about us). In so doing, we become a person who is not deserving of blame, who loves deeply enough to put our own ego aside to know another fully, to put knowing the other first, even if what we come to know in the process is painful. In this sense, though it is challenging to practice, we actually accomplish more on our own behalf by listening deeply and openly as opposed to defending ourselves. The listening is the defense.

Finally, when we are able to just listen to another’s experience, without judgment, even when we believe the other person to be responsible for the experience they are describing, the other person experiences our compassion, which increases the possibility that they will come to discover their own role in their experience. Pointing out the other’s responsibility or blaming them on the other hand only serves to increase their defensiveness, making it less likely that they will take ownership for their experience. If our intention is to help the other own their behavior, listening openly and without judgment is the best method for accomplishing our goal. Making the other feel loved, through our deep and present listening, is the only way to create a safe enough place from which the other can assume the responsibility we want them to assume.   

All of us long to have our experience held, heard, understood and cared about. Yet, we are conditioned to believe that just listening is passive, and that helping must includeaction—making suggestions and offering interpretations, and doing something to change the other person's experience for the better. What we don’t know (because we are not taught) is that true listening, true "being with," is the most active and healing thing we can do; it is an action of the highest order, with the most profound results. Ironically, our being, our presence, is far more powerful than anything we could ever do for another.

The next time you are listening to someone, see what it feels like to commit to being present, to just listening, without offering any interpretation about what the other person is living, or suggesting any way to fix it. See if you can simply be with their experience as it is, and feel what it is like to be living what they’re living. The next time you are sharing an experience—particularly if you are being bombarded with ideas for what to do about your experience, or why it is the way it is—kindly ask the other person if they can listen to you without suggestions, and just hold a space for what you are describing. 

It may feel like an awkward request, but if the other person can truly offer you this, it will be well worth the discomfort of asking. Notice how it feels for you to be heard and absorbed in this way. We need to relearn what helping really means, and what we actually need and want from each other, and for ourselves—the presence that we truly crave. Simultaneously, we need to be able to recognize and voice our real longing—to be known deeply, really listened to, and not fixed.

This experience, at its core, is love.

/www.psychologytoday.com/blog/inviting-monkey-tea/201509/what-we-want-most-relationships-rarely-get

A 6-Step Program for Improving Your Communication Skills

Technology is involved in almost everything we do. There are few moments in life when it has no influence. Yet when you are face to face with someone, in a real and authentic interaction, you are on your own. There is no time delay to think of your response and no screen to hide your reaction. Everything is happening in the moment.

Without sound communication skills, an excited sales person can seem aggressive, an employee in need of guidance can seem like they lack competence and a leader wanting to help can come across as a micro manager. Effective interpersonal communication stems deeper than the words that are spoken, in fact it lays in the balance of how self-aware and emotionally intelligent each person is.

What is self-awareness?

Self-awareness is having a clear perception of your character and personality. It is being aware of how you feel towards certain things, your behavior in different situations, your strengths, weaknesses and any habits you have picked up throughout your life. A self-aware person can look in the mirror and be brutally honest about how they are internally and also recognize how they appear to others externally.

By being able to recognize certain characteristics about yourself, you can take advantage of the positive ones and work on changing the negative ones. In a social setting, such as a networking event, you could adjust your behavior to align with the people or environment you are in.

What is emotional intelligence?

Connected to self-awareness, it is the ability to monitor your own and other people’s emotions. By being able to recognize these emotions, you can use the information to guide your thinking and behavior. In a heated conversation, you could control your own emotions and sense how someone else is truly feeling, before responding in the most appropriate way.

Here are 6 steps to advance your communication skills through self-awareness and emotional intelligence:

1. Determine your relationship value.

Begin by looking at your role within your company and determine how you want your colleagues, employees and clients to see you. What are your strengths? How can they help or influence others? What character values are important for others to see in you? Imagine if you were to leave or retire, how would you want everyone to remember you?

2. Alignment.

Next look at the above values to see if they align with your current behavior and how you treat those around you. People will often feel self-conscious as opposed to self-aware, when they are acting in a way that does not align with their core values. As a rule of thumb: If you treat everyone the same way you expect to be treated, then you don’t have to worry about what others think of you.

3. Objective.

Be clear on what your objective is before entering a conversation. Know what you are hoping to get out of the interaction and let it be known to the other person(s) from the beginning. If they know what your intentions are they won’t be surprised with any questions.

4. Understand your emotions.

Take time to recognize how you feel in certain situations. We often try to brush off any feelings of jealousy, anger or impatience when they arise, but those emotions come to the surface for a reason. It’s critical to spend a few moments to take note of them. The better you can understand your own emotions, the better you will be able to read others.

5. Empathize with others.

Emotional intelligence is not about reading someone else’s mind. It is the ability to empathetically put yourself in someone else’s shoes and sense how they must be feeling. Take time to internalize things that are happening around you, recognize how they make you feel and see how others react as well.

6. Control your emotions.

Despite our good intentions, emotions can get the best of us sometimes. However, your goal isn’t to eliminate your feelings, it is to monitor and control them in the moment. When you are able to do this, you can ensure that your behavior aligns with your values and supports the objectives you want to achieve. Every single interaction you have is perfect ground to practice recognizing and governing your emotions. Over time these emotions will no longer determine how you react, but instead be used to support what you say.

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/245086