What Kind of Stories Do You Tell?

We all tell ourselves stories everyday. What kind of stories do you tell? Do you tell stories of how your spouse doesn't understand you, how you boss is incompetent, how you can't afford a vacation, or something along these lines? We all know these stories don't get us anywhere, but "it's reality," we say. Maybe in this red hot moment it is, but is it really the story you want to tell? Why not create your own reality? It's easier than you think.

Words cast spells, that's why its called SPELLING. Words are Energy. Use Wisely. -- from a Pinterest pin. I cant' find the author, but I love it.

Your words and thoughts have power. I recently read The Power of Story by Jim Loehr. He worked with elite athletes to help them achieve more. He says that he could tell very early on when he talked with an athlete if he would be able to help them or not. If their ultimate goal is just to be number one, he knew it wouldn't be enough to sustain them. He talked about a tennis player whose ultimate goal was to be sunshine for the world. She had what it took to keep going even when she didn't win because she could still meet her ultimate goal of being sunshine and bringing joy to others when they watched her play. That's not to say she threw out her other goals and that any goal is unworthy, but it helps to know what our true heart's desire is.

Here's the process in three simple steps:

1. Determine what your desire really is.It's OK to have any goal in the world, but think about why you want the goal. How will you feel when you get the goal? That's what you really want, the feeling. Hold onto the core desire. Even if what you want comes in a different way than imagined, would it be OK as long as you still got to the what you truly want?

2. Drop your old story. Jeannette Maw taught me that your old story is "not an approved chew toy." You have to drop it and replace it with your new story, just like she trained her foster dogs to drop the shoe and chew on an intended chew toy instead.

3.Tell your new story. Tell it to yourself. Write it down.Tell it to a trusted friend. Tell it with more gusto than you put into your old drama. Make it juicy. See it. Feel it. Touch it. Taste it.

Don't make it hard. Tell yourself the story of the perfect job, the hot date, boundless energy, whatever you want, tell the story of having it like you would tell it to someone after it's already yours. If you notice you old story running through your head or coming out of your mouth, STOP! Then pick up your new story.

Here's an example of what the process might look like:

Goal: to be in a wonderful romantic relationship

Deep desire: to feel loved

Old story: The only guys I meet are jerks or weirdos. All the good ones are already married. I'll have to settle for less than I want if I don't want to be alone. I can't believe how bad my dates all turn out to be.

New Story: My new love is perfect for me. From the first date, we just clicked. We both love to dance and eat sushi. I love staring into his hazel eye's. I love the gentle strength he gives off when he puts his arms around me. It give be goosebumps when I breathe in the scent of him, masculine and earthy. I love how he supports me and wants me to spend time with me friends. I love that he has a healthy ambition, but knows how to have fun. His deep laughter delights me and I get to hear it so often because we are always laughing. He was so worth the wait. How lucky can I be?

That's it. Really, that's all you have to do. Now, you could do more. You could notice and appreciate the areas of you life that you already feel loved, maybe by family or friends, but if you keep focusing on your new story that's all it takes to make it into your real story.

http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Kind-of-Stories-Do-You-Tell?&id=8669405

Free Yourself From Toxic People - 'Create Your Own Reality'

Fed up of living for others? Fed up of pleasing others? Life is too short to make it miserable by living in others footsteps. Time to free yourself from those dominating and toxic people, which do nothing less than dragging you to hell. You don't owe your life to them or they don't own your life. It is time to take a step away from them. They harm your mental health and cognitive thinking leaving you worthless and with low self-esteem.

Toxic people cast a shadow on you covering you from your surroundings leaving you suffocating. These people first isolate you from your social life. They treat you like you are their very own personal property. They suck your positivity as predators. They prove you wrong in every aspect. They judge you as well as other people in their surroundings; Don't worry! it is their own way of hiding their complexes. They lack empathy for others and you will rarely find good words in their vocabulary. They are highly selfish; they will only focus on their benefit and will easily crush you down for their benefit without any remorse. They do not admit their mistakes when they are wrong, they lie twisting the whole scenario holding you responsible for every mistake they made. They do not appreciate your work, every time you do something for yourself they envy, and try their level best to pick and point the flaws and let you down.

They damage you, they damage your confidence, control you as if they have every right to you. They have a great audacity to sabotage people around them. They are always the victim they always hold you responsible for the situations they faced. You keep expecting them to change and they keep on letting you down. Lastly, when you speak for yourself and tell them they are disturbing you, and are interfering in your life. They play victims again here as if they haven't done anything wrong and put you responsible for the whole matter. When they are done destroying you, making you a dead wood, they leave you for no good reason. So, before they leave you, just decide for yourself and leave them before they do, they are not the only pebble on the beach.

Confused? Where to start from and how to start? Are you Afraid? Afraid of making decisions others will laugh at you for your opinions and suggestions saying they are not worth it, huh there only way to drag you back to the misery. Some people are never going to speak in favor of you, so forget it. Step out and cut all ties with the toxic group of fellows, so-called close friend, or dominating relation. Do what satisfies the inner you. If you are satisfied with your work, then all is good. You were not born to please everybody. Be independent forget depending on others stop living in others dreams stop being someone's pawn. This is your life, get on with it. Own it, speak up for yourself. You have every right to your life. Make decisions for yourself. If someone is stopping you from achieving your dreams, that's nobody else but you. You have the control of every situation and you can direct your destiny the way you want no one else would do that for you. The more you come under the shadow of destructive critics the more you are heading back.

In case there is a situation where you have to deal with these kinds of toxic people and have to work in an environment where there is no way out, then there might be some ways you can apply in order to minimize their effect on you.

- Firstly, minimize your time of interaction with them.

- Know your boundaries which you would not cross at any matter especially not for these destructive people.

- Learn to say 'NO', if you are uncomfortable doing something then just simply say 'No'. you don't have to go out of your comfort zone just to please such people.

- Make sure you do not go out of your standards because of these people; be kind, sincere, and caring the way you are.

- Avoid listening to them when they are victimizing themselves, as negativity is contagious it would surround you and you won't even realize it.

- They are in constant need of attention so they'll do anything to create a drama so that they can be the center of everyone's attention. What you can do is run a mile from them at that time.

- Do not take their critics seriously as they will always give you destructive ones, and deflate you.

- Never trust them on anything as they are barefaced liars.

The only revenge you can take from them is to move forward that will burn them into ashes. You don't need any one's validation to move ahead. Fling yourself to work, because that is only going to take you far ahead of where you want to see yourself. Be an eager beaver. It is time to create your own reality and go the extra mile. Challenge yourself with new tasks on daily basis. Consistency is the key to success so make sure you are working day to day for what you desire. Create your own goals, be a go-getter, find out your own paths to success, and live for yourself. Remember, not everyone is born with a silver spoon in their mouth, so you have to work for yourself and Leave no stone unturned. Work on your strengths. Surround yourself with the positive people, people that motivate you, that inspire you and appreciate you. The people that know you are worth everything and would like to see you flourish.

Find out your way; find out your very own passion. Uplift your life, and double your working hours. Find out what is the main cause of distraction to work, as understanding the problem is 80% of the solution.The more you rely on others for their opinions you lose the opportunities and self-worth. Nobody will take you seriously. Have a firm belief that you can and you will. Make a decision. At first, there will be a ton of difficulties and ton of inner voices holding you back from positivity, but with time you will adjust and thank yourself for making the right decision that steered you to the pinnacles of success.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Free-Yourself-From-Toxic-People---Create-Your-Own-Reality&id=9804441