Truth Doesn't Have Versions

The sky is falling - the sky is falling. The earth is flat. We are all going to die in this storm. The end of life as we know it will happen this year. Give me a break. Just because the speed limit is 70 MPH - I don't have to go that fast. Just because the expiration date on my eggs is three days past doesn't mean I have to throw them away. Made my point yet or would you like twenty-five more examples (just kidding)?

Yes, I accept that some things I don't like or agree with are true but I also know that some things you believe are true are not - so - does the wind blow in both directions? Well yes. So, why then can't some people accept what is true when there is more than enough evidence and why do so many people live their lives in the realm of lies and obvious truths? I don't have 200 pages to deal with this so I'll do my best with just a few hundred words.

So, what is truth - truth is most often used to mean being in accord with fact or reality or fidelity to an original or standard. Truth may also often be used in modern contexts to refer to an idea of "truth to self," or authenticity. Need more? Want more? Truth - fact, veracity, certainty, actuality, reality. FYI - Truth isn't - opinion, impression, interpretation, estimation, judgment, belief, experience - Got this one too?

Therefore, I have three questions -

1) why do people act like their opinion etc. is the truth?

2) Why do people work so hard to convince others that their version of truth is the

only one or the only one that matters or the only one that you or I should believe?

3) How many facts (reality do we need) to know what is true or not true.

Is - gravity a truth?

Is - physical death a truth?

Is - the fact that change is constant a truth?

OR,

Is - the weather is crappy today a truth?

Is - the service in this establishment is really bad a truth?

Is - this "__________" (whatever) you believe a truth?

Is - this technology is really slow a truth?

Again - got it?

So, back to my questions.

Why do people act like their opinion etc. is the truth? Everything in life is a perception - the weather, time, health, food etc. In other words - This corn is too hot. No, it isn't! This movie is too long. Maybe yes and maybe no. That color is too dark. See where I'm going with this? Ever had an argument or disagreement with someone?

Sure, we all have. What caused it? Very simply - two different opinions coming face to face with each other - when only one could win but both were not necessarily true but you both believed that each of yours were true as far as the two of you were concerned. All conflict is the result of perceptual interpretation not based on truth and why - because truth does not have to be defended if it is real truth. When people can't let go of the need to justify opinions, attitudes, decisions, actions, feelings etc. that might be inconsistent with truth it is generally because of one of the following exists; the need for control, ego needs, arrogance, low self-esteem, insecurity or early conditioning that caused them to feel they need to get others approval in order to achieve self-acceptance and the way they do this is by being right.

Why do people work so hard to convince others that their version of truth is the only one or the only one that matters or the only one that you or I should believe or accept? A lot of this stems from the previous discussion but for clarity I will add a couple of other items. One is called projection. This is simply a refusal to accept a certain type of self-behavior and implying others of having the behavior that you have but refuse to acknowledge, admit or accept. In other words - "I am always late but can't admit it but I always blame you for being late whether you are or are not."

Another one is expanding on something or just making things up that aren't true. I want others to think I am successful so I create a self-story that over time I come to believe as true. Even if you know me well and know what I say about myself isn't true, I will still boast about these untruths as if they were true. Actually, you would be quite amazed at how many people have this behavior.

How many facts (reality do we need) to know what is true or not true.

Well, if you see a lose wire coming from a generator you might want to avoid it. If you see a red-hot grill you might not want to touch it. How many facts do you need to avoid these disasters? Probably just one. If you want to know if Heaven is for real you might need a few more facts. But here's the real issue when it comes to truth. Some things, many things might be or could be true, but we don't know it because we don't have enough information to make a decision. If this is true just because we lack evidence doesn't mean something is or isn't true. Think about it. For years people believed the earth was flat until what - someone figured out that it wasn't. But, many people continued to believe in this untruth because they lacked wisdom, knowledge or information. The same is true today. Could many things be untrue today that we just don't know are untrue but still believe they are? And the opposite. Could many things we believe are not true actually be true?

I'm done with my opinions - so what do you think about what you just read? Truth? Opinion? Blah, Blah, Blah?

http://ezinearticles.com/?Truth-Doesnt-Have-Versions&id=9728844

No Pretending - Authenticity Rules

Trials and tribulations, frets and worries abound. Many are valid, most as true, and all touch and change life. Because each encounter, regardless of its seeming importance of the moment, can be quite significant in the long run. And that is where individual authenticity becomes so valuable.

Authenticity is that genuineness that resonates from the soul, from the essence of being. It is the deep, down reality of an individual. It is what makes a person tick and tock; it is a natural rhythm and rock. It creates balance and stability because the person is true to the self, faithful to the heart, and sincere in the soul. While much of authenticity is automatic - we are who we are - it is sometimes difficult to maintain this characteristic. When we enter rough waters and restless situations, finding the "right" answer for ourselves, accepting that our right answer does not necessarily meet the needs of others, may require strength and perspiration not to mention intestinal fortitude.

Why would authenticity take so much effort, attention, and determination? I believe it is because basically most people are good. They care about others and they want to create and live in a healthy, happy world. Because of this outward regard, it is easy to lose sight of inward focus. We can lose track of our "self" as we attend to the wants and needs of others. And while we may be behaving with authentic concern, we sometimes disguise our real beliefs and understanding to placate another person's. A little loss can be a gain in the long run as we learn. A lot of loss can mean becoming sightless of the self.

Examples of this type of lost-ness might be spouses, especially if one is particularly domineering. It is often far simpler to give in, to relent, rather than stand up for a fight. Not a fistfight or screaming match, of course, but just taking a stance for a personal wish, desire, or dream and while being willing to reshape it also recognizing that staying with it is essential to authenticity. In an authentic relationship, both participants listen, offer feedback, and then compromise without losing sight of the true desires of the soul while accepting that give-and-take is valuable. Since authenticity by nature should be kind, even when ideas and opinions differ respect reigns and decisions are made with the very best intent.

Parents, especially in my observations, mothers, may become lost in child rearing. In this case it is not so much that authenticity vanishes but that concern for another being supersedes all choices and situations. Part of this is good - parenting is a tremendous responsibility where selfishness must be put aside for the well-being of the child. Parents determined to remain in their own self-centered realm while children self-raise are relinquishing a key component of the parenting role. But this responsibility does not mean total loss of self, but rather a strengthening of moral fiber that will be reflected and absorbed by children.

I find authenticity to be a challenging but gratifying characteristic. I believe I have the genuineness and honesty areas under control and I believe that most people with whom I work recognize this in my behavior and deeds. I also admit that sometimes I waffle and waver to try to satisfy others and that is when bits of my authenticity slip away. The good thing is that these slippings are recoverable. Just because I bow to another today to try to pull a team together does not mean that this part of me is forever lost. I can regroup, re-examine, and regain that authenticity that makes me, me.

http://ezinearticles.com/?No-Pretending---Authenticity-Rules&id=9082126

7 Scientifically Proven Ways to Achieve Better Success in Life

Know this: Hard work alone won't get you there.




Success is a subjective notion, if there ever was one. But for simplicity's sake, let's assume the higher you are on Maslow's hierarchy of needs, the better you're doing. In case you don't remember the levels from Psych 101, essentially, people can't be their best possible selves (self-actualization) until lower-level needs are met first. In other words, you can't be an ideal version of yourself if you don't have enough food and money to pay the bills, or enough love and esteem to feel good about your value as a human being. So, what can you do to move yourself up the pyramid?

Check out the findings from several studies, which shine a light on what it takes to achieve more in life.

Increase your confidence by taking action.

Katty Kay and Claire Shipman, authors of The Confidence Code, wrote a stellar article for The Atlantic on this subject. Highlighting scads of studies that have found that a wide confidence gap exists between the sexes, they point out that success is just as dependent on confidence as it is on competence. Their conclusion? Low confidence results in inaction. "[T]aking action bolsters one's belief in one's ability to succeed," they write. "So confidence accumulates--through hard work, through success, and even through failure."

Broaden your definition of authenticity.

Authenticity is a much sought-after leadership trait, with the prevailing idea being that the best leaders are those who self-disclose, are true to themselves, and who make decisions based on their values. Yet in a recent Harvard Business Review article titled "The Authenticity Paradox," Insead professor Herminia Ibarra discusses interesting research on the subject and tells the cautionary tale of a newly promoted general manager who admitted to subordinates that she felt scared in her expanded role, asking them to help her succeed. "Her candor backfired," Ibarra writes. "She lost credibility with people who wanted and needed a confident leader to take charge." So know this: Play-acting to emulate the qualities of successful leaders doesn't make you a fake. It merely means you're a work in progress.

Improve your social skills.

According to research conducted by University of California Santa Barbara economist Catherine Weinberger, the most successful business people excel in both cognitive ability and social skills, something that hasn't always been true. She crunched data linking adolescent skills in 1972 and 1992 with adult outcomes, and found that in 1980, having both skills didn't correlate with better success, whereas today the combination does. "The people who are both smart and socially adept earn more in today's work force than similarly endowed workers in 1980," she says.

Train yourself to delay gratification.

The classic Marshmallow Experiment of 1972 involved placing a marshmallow in front of a young child, with the promise of a second marshmallow if he or she could refrain from eating the squishy blob while a researcher stepped out of the room for 15 minutes. Follow-up studies over the next 40 years found that the children who were able to resist the temptation to eat the marshmallow grew up to be people with better social skills, higher test scores, and lower incidence of substance abuse. They also turned out to be less obese and better able to deal with stress. But how to improve your ability to delay things like eating junk food when healthy alternatives aren't available, or to remain on the treadmill when you'd rather just stop?

Writer James Clear suggests starting small, choosing one thing to improve incrementally every day, and committing to not pushing off things that take less than two minutes to do, such as washing the dishes after a meal or eating a piece of fruit to work toward the goal of eating healthier. Committing to doing something every single day works too. "Top performers in every field--athletes, musicians, CEOs, artists--they are all more consistent than their peers," he writes. "They show up and deliver day after day while everyone else gets bogged down with the urgencies of daily life and fights a constant battle between procrastination and motivation."

Demonstrate passion and perseverance for long-term goals.

Psychologist Angela Duckworth has spent years studying kids and adults, and found that one characteristic is a significant predictor of success: grit. "Grit is having stamina. Grit is sticking with your future, day in, day out, not just for the week, not just for the month, but for years, and working really hard to make that future a reality," she said in a TED talk on the subject. "Grit is living life like it's a marathon, not a sprint."

Embrace a "growth mindset."

According to research conducted by Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck, how people view their personality affects their capacity for happiness and success. Those with a "fixed mindset" believe things like character, intelligence, and creativity are unchangeable, and avoiding failure is a way of proving skill and smarts. People with a "growth mindset," however, see failure as a way to grow and therefore embrace challenges, persevere against setbacks, learn from criticism, and reach higher levels of achievement. "Do people with this mindset believe that anyone can be anything, that anyone with proper motivation or education can become Einstein or Beethoven? No, but they believe that a person's true potential is unknown (and unknowable); that it's impossible to foresee what can be accomplished with years of passion, toil, and training," she writes.

Invest in your relationships.

After following the lives of 268 Harvard undergraduate males from the classes of 1938 to 1940 for decades, psychiatrist George Vaillant concluded something you probably already know: Love is the key to happiness. Even if a man succeeded in work, amassed piles of money, and experienced good health, without loving relationships he wouldn't be happy, Vaillant found. The longitudinal study showed happiness depends on two things: "One is love," he wrote. "The other is finding a way of coping with life that does not push love away."

http://www.inc.com/christina-desmarais/7-scientifically-proven-ways-to-achieve-better-success-in-life.html