Our world is dangerously polarized at a time when humanity is more closely interconnected-politically, economically, and electronically-than ever before.
~Karen Armstrong~
If you look hard, you can find pockets of peace in the world. Maybe you will find one as you walk on the beach in early morning. Shore birds scavenge for bits of food. You amble along listening to the waves breaking and birds calling as you look for interesting shells or collect shark teeth. Waves lap gently on the shore. The sand dries as the tide recedes. The sun gently warms the beach, the birds and you. Right now nature seems at peace. So do the birds. So do you. Maybe you can think of another setting where you have found similar moments of peace. Perhaps yours is in the woods, on top of a mountain or in the desert.
Do you know anyone who lives in peace most of the time? Do you usually live in peace? Even people at peace will experience at least moments of disequilibrium. But most likely they practice what Armstrong describes as the process of using your analytical brain to step back from your emotions. In the process you become more aware of them and how they affect your current experience. She is referring to mindfulness. You might like to try it.
Here's why mindfulness is important. As you progress through your day, events will occur around you. Some events will bring up old feelings which can consume you if you let them. Let's consider an example. Say you are driving to work on a busy highway. The car in the next lane and slightly ahead of you moves suddenly into the lane in front of you without any signal and requires that you move your foot quickly to your brake to avoid a collision. With any luck, you will have your foot on the brake soon enough and won't end up with a crumpled fender. All that might happen before you have a chance to experience any thoughts or feelings about the incident. Your reflexes come to your rescue without any conscious thought process.
One of two things might happen next. You could become filled with rage at the stupidity of the other driver. He almost caused an accident with you as the victim. He should learn to drive better or get off the road. You drive up as close to the other car as you can, blasting your horn to make sure he knows that he upset you and how you feel about it.
Or, after your initial shock, you could be thankful your car was not hit. After your initial anger, you reflect on your emotions. You were scared, but your first reaction was one of anger. You are glad you were watching your car and his, so you could avoid a crash. You realize it's your lucky day.
Which of these is your usual way of reacting? I would guess that the average person would be more likely to react with rage than gratitude. While you could easily justify your anger, what good does it do to fly into a rage and stay that way? If you carry your mood with you throughout the day, it is likely to taint everything else that happens. You can blame the other driver for ruining your day. All you will have is the satisfaction of having an outlet for your anger. You may become so focused on your rage that you bypass opportunities during the day to have productive and enjoyable interactions with others.
At the end of the day, do you want rage to have been your sole focus? You have a choice. You can let your emotions rule you and keep you in a negative space. After all, there is some satisfaction in having someone to blame for the way your day turned out. To be fair, you did not choose to have that close call in your car. But you do have the choice of letting your emotions direct your whole day. It takes some work to get them under control, but it is possible.
Action steps:
- When was the last time you felt thoroughly at peace?
- Where was it?
- What were you doing?
- Can you find something good in an upsetting situation?
- Try it next time you have a chance.
https://ezinearticles.com/?Why-We-Are-Not-at-Peace&id=9718017
