Do You Hear What I Hear?

Have you ever attempted to read jumbled letter paragraphs and wondered why they seemed simple to some and challenging to others? Or listened to an eye-witness accounting of conversations that left you wondering where the truth may lie because they were so different? Even more perplexing is being present yourself and feeling certain that you heard everything correctly only to hear many differing accounts of the same event. How is this possible? Do others see what you see or hear what you hear? If not, how is effective communication even possible?

The human brain is remarkable for a multitude of reasons but auto correct may be the best teacher in understanding what is happening when another persons recounting goes awry. The human brain anticipates, just like auto correct, what is coming next. As it is engaged it anticipates what seems to fit the sentence or scenario and fills in the blanks. For the same reason that auto correct is great for some it is a nightmare for others. The brain anticipates based on the filters, biases and experiences it has recorded in its own private reference library. We stop really listening when we think we can 'fill in the blanks.' Life experience now enters the equation.

A newborn baby may be born into a large family of door slammers who are accustomed to loud noises and verbal shouting. The first time it hears these sounds the baby cries loudly in fear. Each time someone comforts them they grow more and more accepting that the loud environment is normal. A baby born into a household where music plays quietly and visitors murmur to allow the sleeping baby to rest develops completely different filters. While one may hear normal in loud noises the other will be terrified. It only takes a few weeks to develop their normal. Children who live in abusive households lose the ability to draw the line and establish barriers for themselves in relationships because they were not permitted to do so as a child. Theirs is a different normal. People relate, judge and interact through what they identify as normal.

What you have personally experienced in life largely determines what you hear and see; the blanks are filled in by your anticipation of what is coming. One person's anticipation can be diametrically opposed to the next persons based on what they have lived, learned to accept and what they believe is the anticipated outcome of a sentence, a paragraph, a thought or a relationship. Many times people do not hear or see what you do. Their blanks were filled in from a different set of circumstances.

When communications become completely skewered, try tuning in to the person by listening. If you find yourself in a situation where you simply cannot understand why another person believes in something you think is unimaginable or expects an outcome that seems impossible to you take a moment to tune in to them. Listen as they describe their life experiences. Words and phrases can tell you how they are accustomed to communicating in life, or what they have learned to accept as normal.

Is there an air of expectation or resignation? Are they expecting to encounter the worst case or anticipating a miracle? Our expectations in life are developed when we are very young and totally under the control of authority figures around us. It takes a determined effort to alter the course and see or hear things differently. But we can; and when we do we can come together and find common ground. We can understand.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Do-You-Hear-What-I-Hear?&id=9952141

Brain Overload - You May Need To Up Your Vitamins And Cardio To Cope

Most of us realize that we have one-foot in the real world and one-foot in the virtual world and sometimes it is hard to say which one we are really in at any time. The other day I was at Starbucks, in line waiting, and the five people ahead of me were all on their smartphones, texting or whatever, the cashier looked up and said "next" but no one looked up, everyone was busy, so I cut to the front and ordered, I looked back feeling guilty and no one even noticed - they were not paying attention - yes, better there in line than in their non-self-driving car on the road while I crossed in a crosswalk.

Where is all this going? Are we driven to distraction, are we improving our efficiency, are we really living, or only living half a life in two places? By now I think we all know that much of our future will be Virtual Reality and Augmented Reality and that this future will blurr our perception of this current reality, and obviously I am not the first to state this (Cite: 1). There have been TEDtalks about this and even speculation that we may now be living in a simulated reality, like the Matrix. Many thinkers today believe this and their reasoning is intellectually sound, which may bother some folks to consider that they are merely an Avatar in a highly sophisticated computer game, perhaps known as the Life Experience or something of that nature?

The was an interesting article in The Institute, the official IEEE (The Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers) publication titled: "Augmented Reality Could Contribute to Information Overload, If We Let It - A new kind of operating system will be needed to encourage mindfulness rather than distraction," by Amanda Davis published on December 22, 2016. The article states:

"As AR applications emerge it will begin to take a toll on human consciousness, according to John Rousseau, executive director at Artefact.. He says our perception of reality could be influenced by a constant 'feed' of information that-like today-is created and controlled by a variety of self-interested parties."

There have been research studies (Cite: 2) showing that the use of smart phones and other gadgets is as addictive as heroin. The Union Newspaper (Northern NV) "Richard Cristdahl: Another inconvenient truth," which stated:

"Nicholas Kardaras, PhD, addiction specialist and columnist, calls it "digital heroin" and Andrew Doan, MD, PhD, head of addiction research for the Pentagon and U.S. Navy, and an associate scientist at the National Institute of Health, calls video games and screen technologies "digital pharmakeia" (digital drugs)."

We know that video games are addicting, literally they fit all the definitions I've ever seen. We now know our smart devices are addicting (in all fairness and disclosure; I do not personally own a smartphone), so in the future when these technologies really get good and appear very real, it will be hard for most people to justify staying in the moment or with mindfulness, when the allure to be anything you want to be is just a matter of flipping a switch or a simple voice command and all the holographic world pops up in front of you.

Something needs to happen, because where we are headed isn't pretty, and what we are doing now isn't working. It isn't healthy to sit on your butt and text and it isn't safe to walk or drive and text. Our minds are being modified and we are depleting our brains of nutrients straddling these two-worlds trying to multi-task. If we continue we'll need to up the cardio-exercise and take some serious vitamins to keep our brains efficient at the myriad of tasks at hand. Please consider all this and think on it.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Brain-Overload---You-May-Need-To-Up-Your-Vitamins-And-Cardio-To-Cope&id=9669468

Starting Over - It Only Gets Better! (By David T Lang)

At the age of 38 I left the only career I had ever known to start over. Like many people I was looking for a better standard of living for both myself and my family. I had invested over 20 years in a military career and was at the top of my chosen field -- for which I received about $40,000 a year. Although the thought of starting over when I was almost 40 was daunting, I set a goal to make $100,000 a year within five years, hung up my guns, and ventured into civilian life. That was 20 years ago. I hit my goal of $100,000 a year in less than three years and went on to become a corporate director with a salary of over $200,000 a year in just over 10 years. But that's a story for another time. This article is about starting over.

In the past 20 years I have learned that there really is no starting over in life. We torture ourselves with self-depreciating thoughts that we have failed, wasted x number of years, or squandered our youth climbing the wrong mountain. When, in reality, we have gained new viewpoints, new skills, and new energetic patterns. You see, you can't start over because every day when the sun rises, you start from where you are and where you are changes with every life experience. I'm sure you've heard people say "if I could only go back to when I was 17 and do it again, things would be different!" But, as we know, we can't! It's the same with thinking you have to start over; it's not only a misperception, it's impossible! There is no regression - life moves forward!

If you have saved your money for the past 20 years to buy a house and then you change your mind and decide to buy a boat, do you tell yourself that you are starting over? No! You are simply redirecting your investment toward a new goal. It's the same with life. If you have invested the past 20 years running a log mill and now you want to sell real estate, do you tell yourself that you are starting over? Yes, most people do, and that's the flawed premise! The energetic truth is that you are simply redirecting your investment toward a new goal. In those 20 years running the log mill you learned supply & demand, interpersonal communications, finance, planning, and a host of other things. You also developed your intuition, learned the value of integrity, made friends, fell in love, walked your dog, and marveled at nature. All of those things changed who you are both intellectually and spiritually. Given all those millions of events, experiences, and feelings, you could not go back to who you were 20 years ago and start over if your life depended on it! As Dr. Wayne Dyer was famous for saying "if you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." You did not spend 20 years, you invested 20 years. You are not starting over, you are redirecting your investment toward a new goal.

And one more thing (my tribute to Steve Jobs), you are never too old to redirect your investment toward a new goal. I'm 58 and planning to redirect my investments from the past 40 years into a new goal. I'll check back in with you in 2038 and let you know how it went!

https://ezinearticles.com/?Starting-Over---It-Only-Gets-Better!&id=10004984

Priorities - How to Determine Them (By Linda Hancock)

A few years ago I heard professional speaker David Irvine talk about a concept that has significantly changed my life. David explained that in life you are given opportunities that he compared to rubber balls and glass balls.

Rubber ball situations are those that you can throw away knowing that they will come back to you. You don't have to deal with them right away because you will have another chance when they bounce back.

Glass ball situations, however, are one-time only. If you drop the glass ball it will break and you never get a second chance to experience it again.

David told a heart-wrenching story about how his wife was expecting a child and he promised her that he would be there for the birth. He was contracted to do a workshop in another province before she was due and, despite her requests to stay with her, took a pager and left. He assured her that she could page him and he would be able to return quickly should her labour start.

After his training session, David was invited to go out for dinner with some of the participants. When he arrived at his hotel room there was a message for him to call his wife. He was horrified to learn that she was in such advanced labour that he wouldn't be able to get to her before the birth.

He hadn't realized that the batteries in his pager had died. The glass ball had broken and he would never be able to recapture that life experience.

David encouraged us to make a list of three or more things that we value as glass balls in our own lives.

Over the years there have been times when I have been extremely busy. Sometimes I was presented with glass balls that I didn't at first recognize. It would have been easier to tell my sister that I couldn't leave the office to be with her when she was ill. She said that she wanted me to know that she wasn't expecting me to go to her. I would have saved eighteen hours of driving, a good deal of expense but dropped a very precious ball if I hadn't paid attention and travelled to see her.

Sometimes we are asked to join people for celebrations that they are planning but just don't take the time to celebrate with them. Glass balls dropped!

I am excited because at the end of June I will be in Saskatoon for a grandson's high school graduation. And then, in the middle of July, my Hancock cousins will get together in Regina for a family wedding. All glass balls!

What are the glass balls in your life? Are there things that you need to do or recognize despite your busy life? Remember, when you drop the glass ones, they are gone forever.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Priorities---How-to-Determine-Them&id=9428065