8 Reasons to Stop Worrying Now

Worrying...

1. Consumes energy. Devote all that energy to yourself instead of investing in creating and accumulating adrenaline and cortisol.
2. Results in sleeping problems. You need the rest to face whatever it is that really ends up happening in the future.
3. Focuses on the future. Instead of living here, today, you're so focused on the future that you have no time to enjoy the now.
4. The future is unknown. Therefore, you're focused on something that doesn't exist. How many times did you worry about something that never ended up happening, at least the way you feared it would?
5. Consumes time. You spend many hours worrying. By the time you manage to return to something that is not worrying you, a lot of time has elapsed; time that could have been used more productively or to have more fun.
6. Blocks you. When you try to redirect your mind to something else, your mind goes back to the issue that's worrying you over and over again, thus blocking you from doing anything else.
7. Distracts you. By diverting your attention from other things, you can't fully focus on them. The issue that worries you distracts you from other, more immediate topics.
8. Produces anxiety. Focusing on something that has no solution (and nothing in the future really does) only leads to increased levels of anxiety from a lack of resolution and uncertainty.

Next time you find yourself worrying over something, ask yourself what you're achieving. Isn't there anything else you'd rather be doing or thinking about?

If you really need to PLAN, there are better ways of doing it. These are a few of the tips I recommend you consider when planning in order to stop worrying:

1. Set a goal. What is it that you need to plan? What will you make you feel you actually have a plan? Define what your real objective is and what steps you're going to take to reach it.
2. Set your limits. What level of detail do you need to plan? How much improvisation and adaptation will you allow yourself? One can plan and plan and plan, always looking to define more and more details. But there comes a time in which that level of detail is not realistic anymore, as chances are that our plans will not happen the way we're imagining. So, how far into the details do you want to go?
3. Allocate a fixed amount of time. What is the maximum time you're giving yourself to plan this? Set a fixed time and don't go over that time, even if you didn't finish your plan. If more time is needed, decide when you will work on your plan again, and for how long. In between working times, no planning is allowed. You will only plan during those pre-assigned times.
4. Then relax. Once you have a plan, accept that life might change it. After all, we can't look into the future and life has this habit of surprising us... But for now, you do have a plan. It's the best plan you could make. Follow the steps you planned and allow yourself a little improvisation on the way. The rest of the time, just relax. Whenever worrying thoughts come to your mind again, remind yourself that you already have a plan.

Enjoy life... ALL of it,

Humanology

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Be Kind to Yourself

We have always been taught to be kind to others right from our childhood, but more often than not, we forget about being kind to ourselves. Sometimes, we can be really bitter self-critics and bring ourselves down. Many of us neglect taking care of ourselves emotionally. Life is tough in itself, and there really is no reason to make it harder than it has to be. Just think about it for a moment, the energy we spend worrying about our future, dwelling in our past, comparing ourselves to others, and judging ourselves, never having to spend any of that energy on such trivial things.

Do not associate being kind to yourself as being selfish. We need to realize that it is okay to care for ourselves, and start believing that we deserve to be happy too. Start being kind to yourself and your confidence will improve. It is very important to be kind to yourself in order to have a healthy self-esteem. In the beginning, it may feel awkward to do so, saying things that making you feel better, because we seldom do it. Doing it in small amounts everyday can really boost your mood and self-esteem. If we are able to be kind and gentle towards others, we should be able to treat ourselves the same way as well.

You can begin by quashing all self-doubt about yourself. Cheer yourself up. Be your own biggest motivator. Start thinking about all the good things you have done out of selflessness and rejoice in those memories. Be kind to your mind and do things that make you feel positive. Stop holding grudges as they are an unnecessary burden. Mistakes are a part of life and it's absolutely okay to do mistakes. It is what makes us human. Grudges take a toll on us both physically and emotionally, so just learn from them and set yourself free.

Take a moment to give yourself credit for all the things you have done. We move through so fast through our days, we often forget to give ourselves credit which makes us unhappy. Do kind things for your mind. Take some time in the morning or evening to read a book or listen to some music or to do something that really brings you joy. If you are enjoying it, take more time. Always remember to be kind to yourself. Always ask yourself, "Have I been kind to myself today?"

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Stress Management In 3 Easy Steps

Have you noticed that we generally tend to stress about future events? Typically, we stress about the exam next month, the company restructure next year, the "having to buy a house" at some point in life, the presentation that's due next week... And have you noticed what happens when all of these events become a fact of the Now? We usually become resourceful, we pull ourselves together and we deal with it! Success is inevitable eventually, even if we have to veer off course temporarily. Why then do we have to spend countless nights awake worrying about what is to come? How does that help us achieve a better outcome? Of course it doesn't, and we all know it. So let's do something about it, let's stop worrying and start living. It is actually not that difficult. All you need is awareness and willingness.

Assuming you are already willing to do away with your stress, the key to building your awareness is mastering your ability to live in the Now. You can't be where you want to be; you can only be where you are!

Living in the Now is a muscle that we have to exercise consistently. Here is an easy three-step approach to doing so. Practice this daily and you will become more and more present and release the stress as a consequence:

1. At the beginning of each day create a goal related to how you would like to feel that day. Let's say today you would like to feel peaceful.
2. Immediately after you've set your goal, spend some time engaging all five senses: smell something that gives you peace; taste something that gives you peace; look at something that gives you peace; listen to something the gives you peace; touch something that gives you peace. You can either do this "for real" or you can imagine smelling, touching, tasting, hearing and seeing something peaceful. The brain doesn't know the difference between doing something for real and imagining it, and your body will react the same way (i.e. by getting out of Fight / Flight and activating the parasympathetic nervous system which helps us rest, digest and regenerate).
3. Now that you have engaged the five senses, you have altered your state of mind and you can be present. From that space, you can go about your day feeling happy, and you are far more likely to complete your tasks successfully.

Remember: Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success.

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Suffering From Addiction to Over-Thinking? Learn The Symptoms & The Cure

Do you ever over-think things? Do you get caught up in mental cycles of negativity or fear that keep you from living fully? Does your mind race like a hamster wheel-and you just wish you could step off?

Did it ever occur to you that you might be addicted to thinking? If so you're not alone. It's estimated that the average person has between 50,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day.

Yet, how many of those thoughts are helpful? How many do you really need? How many are even true?

Though most people are unaware of it, addiction to thinking is the number one addiction affecting us humans today. And, it just may be the driving force behind all of our other addictions.

Here are the symptoms you may or may not have associated with over-thinking:

• Constant worrying about what you did in the past or what might happen in the future

• An incessant voice in your head that comments on everything

• Feeling judged and habitually judging others

• Keeping the radio or TV on as a constant background

• Constantly checking your Facebook, Twitter, texts, and email

• Needing to keep your mind busy

• Discomfort with silence, stillness, and inactivity

• Discomfort with feelings and body sensations

• Feeling there's always too much to do & never enough time

• Trouble sleeping, meditating, or relaxing deeply

• Feeling a constant subtle stress that never lets up

So, what's behind addiction to thinking? Why is it there?

What drives it? If we knew what that was, maybe we could put a stop to it and the stress it causes!

There is a two-pronged false belief that traps us in our thoughts:

1) We believe that "our thoughts represent reality," and,

2) We believe that "we are our thoughts."

Without us being aware of it, these two false beliefs makes us slaves to the mental fabrications we call thoughts.

Mental fabrications?

Yes, that's right. Our problems begin when we mistakenly believe that our thoughts represent reality.

If that were the case, of course, thinking would be as important as it seems. It would be how we know what is real and possible in our lives.

Yet, thinking does not, in fact, represent reality. Instead, thinking interprets, categorizes, and organizes reality. Thinking is not about representing Reality at all, it is about analyzing reality and organizing it for action.

Thinking makes reality into a "To Do List."

You can recognize this, if you stop and notice what you're thinking at any given moment-and then ask yourself, what is the purpose of that thought? What are the consequences of thinking that way? What type of action does it compel or inspire?

Without understanding what thinking really is and what it does, you can unwittingly get caught up in over-thinking. And, excessive thinking leads to excessive doing which leads to excessive stress.

We become that hamster on the wheel of thought, spinning around until we are exhausted.

Then, we compound matters by thinking that we "are" the thoughts that we "have." We identify ourselves with that incessant voice in our heads. How crazy is that? Are you really that voice that spews 50,000 to 60,000 thoughts every day?

How could you possibly be defined by all of those varied thoughts? You would have to be a severely multiple personality. Is that really who you are? Are you really just that voice in your head, who thinks one thing one moment and a completely different thing the next-all day long?

When we begin to investigate what thinking really is and how it's different from who we really are, we are able to step back and get a little space from our thoughts. We begin to experience a little freedom from all that thinking.

When we understand the real role of thinking, it empowers us to let go of thoughts that do not serve us or others, choose those that do, and spend more time being present with, paying attention to, appreciating, and enjoying, Reality Itself. We step off the hamster wheel, take a deep breath, and take in what is really happening inside and around us.

This opens the door for us to see more clearly, listen and feel more deeply, and appreciate the peace and joy of enjoying life as it is-without all the commentary.

Are you ready to be free from negative thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that stress you out?

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Can You Gage Your Level of Subconscious Stress?

Did you know that stress presents itself in different degrees? That it can start by something as simple as daily worries? That it accumulates in us? That it can be silently consuming our subconscious capacities? That it can still be properly handled and managed?

Although stress is quite a modern concept, Hippocrates already discussed anxiety back in the 4th century BC. It is a problem that humanity has had to deal with since the dawn of time. In spite of which, we still seems to know very little about how to handle it.

In my line of work, humanology, I come across a lot of people who suffer from all types of stress and have come to some conclusions that I'd like to share with you here today, together with a few tips and tricks in the hope that they can help you.

1. Worry, fear, anxiety and panic can be just different forms and degrees of stress: When any of those forms of fear is present in a person's life too often, chances are that they end up escalating into the next level in this progression.

2. Worry can also become a form of stress when the person can't control it. Those who can't stop worrying over things end up accumulating a lot of cortisol, adrenaline and norepinephrine, which are slowly released by their system each time they plan to "fix" a problem by getting ready for it. They are regularly preparing their bodies for the "bad something" to come. There are certain trends at this level:

1. Overthinking is a form of constant worry.Those who can't stop thinking without control, whose thoughts govern them, tend to always think about problems and worries. They can't seem to be able to disconnect from their worries and are therefore constantly releasing stress-based chemicals. Daydreamers are one type of overthinkers. Most daydreamers spend their time also worrying, not enjoying fun or positive imaginations.

2. The excessive need to control everything is another form of worry.Those who need to have everything under their control, the so-called control freaks, are in a permanent state of worry over their losing such control.

3.

When the worry turns into "what if... " questions, it becomes fear. Worrying over something can grow into fearing it very easily. All "what if... " questions indicate some kind of fear. "What if that doesn't work out the way I want it to? What if that other thing happens? What if that person fails... " all indicate a fear of something happening or not in the future. The worry becomes more focused and the feeling more acute. The person's body segregates bigger amounts of chemicals.

4.

Constant worry and fear have a cumulative stressful effect in us. Being in a constant state of worry or fear leads to an excess of chemicals in our bodies. Those chemicals, if not properly managed and released, will accumulate in a person's body and could grow into silent anxiety.

5.

Worry, fear and anxiety can occupy a huge part of our subconscious capacity. When a person is silently and subconsciously handling worry, fear and anxiety many hours a day, that person's brain is working overtime.

1. The person is not aware of it. The conscious part of that person's brain will deal with the conscious symptoms of worry, fear and anxiety, whenever aware of them, but the subconscious ones will still grow and multiply, making use of the person's subconscious mechanisms and capacity.

2. The mind is like an iceberg and our conscious mind is nothing but the very tiny tip. When a person suffers from chronic worry, fear or anxiety, visible, noticeable symptoms will be tackled. Unfortunately, that same person will also be subconsciously working on silent stress, trying to manage it, while it gradually accumulates inside due to a lack of adequate release mechanisms for the non-stop triggers. This reality is one of the main reasons why worry and fear can end up escalating into anxiety.

6.

When the subconscious can't handle it, the conscious mind will release it. The subconscious tries to keep up with the stress, the worry, the fear, mostly by keeping it all bottled up inside, until its mere amount is so huge, that it overflows into the conscious mind in the form of anxiety or panic symptoms. Thus, all those never-released chemicals end up forcing the person to stop and do something. By then, handling them is obviously much harder. There might be years of accumulation and poor handling.

So, then, what can we do? There are some obvious answers to that question. But maybe not so many obvious tools. Let me offer you a couple of both.

• Work with a humanologist. That is, of course, the most obvious solution J. Humanologists are experts in human beings and can expand on the understanding and tools beyond the scope of this article. Seek one out to help you recognize your level of stress, your triggers and the personal tools you need to change that trend in you. In the meantime, you can try the following tips as well:
• Stop accumulating. Yes, even though that sounds obvious, how is it done? How can an overthinker stop thinking? How can a worrier stop worrying?
• Mindfulness: Fear is ALWAYS in the future. What if... always refers to something that hasn't quite happened yet. Therefore, learning to be in the here and the now is key to those people. Learn to return from the future to the present. The more often you get back to the present, the less negative chemicals your system will be releasing. Learn and use mindfulness techniques to force yourself to be in the present as often as possible.
• Connect with the world outside. Many people who suffer from worry, fear, anxiety and panic spend their hours inside themselves. They often spend many hours in their heads. And they sometimes forget to connect with the world outside, with their reality. The more time a person spends inside, without a clear connecting line with the world outside, the greater the chance to fall into this stress trap. KEEP IN CONTACT WITH THE OUTSIDE REALITY at all times. Yes, introspection is great... as long as you are not disconnected from reality. Yes, meditation is great... as long as you are not disconnected from reality. Yes, being inside one's personal sphere is great... as long as you're not disconnected from reality. Then, make the CONSCIOUS effort to remain connected to reality and the outside world, no matter what. Keep on coming out for air and a clear anchor on reality.
• Time boxes. Design a certain fixed time to worry every day. Give yourself the chance to really worry for, let's say, an hour a day. AND THAT IS IT! Once the hour is over, any time your worry, fear or anxiety comes calling again, tell it to return tomorrow, for the next time box.

• 
  

Fight negative with positive. Some other happier chemicals can help you reduce the levels of accumulated cortisol, adrenaline and norepinephrine in your body: oxytocin, endorphins, serotonin, dopamine and the like. Learn how to release them more often and in greater quantities for two reasons:

• They fight the bad guys. Good chemicals will make you feel better and will help you relax almost immediately. Which means that the good ones will target some of the negative chemicals.
• When your body is releasing these, it can't be releasing those. Thus, if your body is busy flushing your system with wonderful oxytocin, it can't be producing the nasty products at the same time.

The positive result is therefore double: there are less bad chemicals in you because the good ones are fighting them and you're producing less because you're busy doing something else.

• 
  

Let them go! Nothing will work if you continue creating more and more of the nasty chemicals. Learn some tools to get rid of the stress you already have inside: exercise, practice laughing, apply the tools mentioned above to counteract and release the nasty bugs, and take control of your own being.

All these tips will help you handle your stress a bit better. Don't let it grow in you until it becomes unmanageable. Seek help now instead of letting it overtake you and control your will. It can be done.

Enjoy life... ALL of it,

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Help! I Can't Sleep! (By Michelle Geysbeek )

Have you ever had one of those nights? You know the kind; the constant tossing and turning, the tight muscles, the inability shut your mind off? It seems like that stupid alarm clock is staring you in the face. If only you could just relax and let it all go instead of worrying if you'll have enough coffee to make it through tomorrow.

Sleep is a strange thing. We need it, we crave it, we fight it, we do our best to control it instead of it controlling us. Unfortunately, our bodies don't function as they should when we are sleep deprived. The crux of it is, ongoing research has now established that not getting enough sleep is detrimental to our health. When we sleep our bodies repair vital organs and body systems, such as our adrenal glands, and cement our long-term memory while helping us to make sense of the days events.

For example, lack of sleep can severely weaken your immune system, accelerate tumor growth, cause a pre-diabetic state which can make you feel hungry even when you've already eaten. Even one night of poor sleep can impair your memory, decrease your problem solving ability and impair performance on physical and mental tasks, not to mention how these issues can manifest themselves in your body.

The average person needs six to eight hours of sleep each night. For most people sleeping under six hours will actually accelerate aging and increase your risk of diabetes. But everyone is different, some need more and some need less, if you feel as if you're dragging during the day, you need a full eight hours of sleep.

So the question becomes, when we are stressed and can't get a good night's sleep what are we to do? While nutrition, exercise, meditation and how we think about our life are major factors in our health and stress levels, whether we get enough sleep may be the most deciding factor in our health and well-being. Here are some suggestions to help you get out of the stress rut and get some much-needed sleep.

Avoid before-bed snacks, particularly grains and sugars This will raise blood sugar and inhibit sleep. Later, when blood sugar drops too low (hypoglycemia), you might wake up and not be able to fall back asleep.

Sleep in complete darkness or as close as possible When light hits the eyes, it disrupts the circadian rhythm of the pineal gland and production of melatonin and seratonin. Also, there should be as little light in the bathroom as possible so you aren't jolted by bright light (think Gizmo and Gremlins) if you have to get up in the middle of the night.

No TV right before bed Even better, get the TV out of the bedroom or even out of the house, completely. It is too stimulating to the brain and it will take longer to fall asleep. Also disruptive of pineal gland function for the same reason as above.

Read something spiritual or religious This will help to relax. Don't read anything stimulating, such as a mystery or suspense novel, as this may have the opposite effect. In addition, if you are really enjoying a suspenseful book, you might wind up unintentionally reading for hours, instead of going to sleep.

Pay off debt Make a plan to pay off what is burdening you. It's hard to sleep when we are worried about how we are going to make those payments. Devising and implementing a plan of attack will empower you, making you more relaxed that everything will be alright now that there is a plan to work from.

Avoid toxic and negative people or situations If you are constantly bombarded with stressful people or situations, find a way to remove yourself. Either discuss your situation with them and let them know how you feel so you can work on improving the situation or you may have to eliminate them from your circle, even for a short time.

Use breathing techniques Like EFT, breathing exercises help refocus our minds and allow our parasympathetic nervous system to come forward. This will help relax you and regain control of your thoughts.

Bring ALL thoughts under YOUR control Negative thinking leads to more stress. Most of the negative thoughts are about what you can't control anyway, so why not take control of those thoughts? Write a list of all the negative thoughts that go through your mind. Now, take some time and restate those thoughts in a positive way. Something like, "Why did I just try to do that? I did it wrong, I should have known I wouldn't get it right." Now try saying, "Oopsies, I just messed up. But I'm trying something new, I will get better at it."

Write in a journal Keep a journal or spiral notebook next to your bed. When you find yourself having thoughts racing through your mind, write them down. It doesn't matter what it is. It could be as simple as get milk tomorrow at the store, or as extreme as admitting you feel stressed and hopeless. Just the act of writing things down removes them from constantly coursing through your mind.

There are many ways to deal with stress and bring your body, mind and spirit back into balance. Because stress is a major factor in the majority of health problems plaguing people today, taking steps to learn how to manage the traps that drag us into the spiral of sleepless nights will empower us to take the steps needed to climb out. Not only that, being able to manage stress will help your mental well-being. Being a positive thinker has an effect on our health because our bodies actually respond to our emotions on a cellular level.

There are many pills out there promising to reduce your stress and/or help you sleep. The problem is, some of them can be harmful or addictive. Learn how to use any of the techniques above in a way that works for you and you won't have to resort to dangerous drugs to bring on that lovely slumber.

So, bottom line, give yourself the tools you need to combat stress so you can get some much-needed rest.

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The Very Creative Art of Worrying

What do you worry about most?

I once knew someone who said when there was nothing to worry about, then she worried there was something she had forgotten to worry about.

When we worry we tend to fixate on an imagined future event. Worry is always about uncertainty and how things may not turn out as we would like, and how we think we will cope with the consequences of that.

It really does require a lot of energy and imagination to come up with the endless permutations - not to mention the intense emotions and stress worry can cause us to experience.

Do you know the original meaning of the word worry?

'To harass by pursuit and barking; to attack repeatedly; also, to tear or mangle with the teeth.'

Interesting. Is this what you are doing to yourself when you are worrying?

Now that is a worrying thought.

And what is it that makes us worry about all the terrible things that could happen, when we could just as easily focus our attention on all the wonderful possibilities? That perhaps may be even better than we have imagined?

Worry really is an art form.

It is a form of creativity in, and of itself.

I asked someone recently, 'of all the things that you have worried about - how many of them have actually happened?'

People who worry often say that they 'just can't help it'. But what if that is not true?

For that to be true you would have to have no control over your mind and that is certainly not true. For many of us worrying is a habit we don't even remember learning.

Your mind will run away with itself.

It is what your mind does. It likes having problems to solve. There is nothing wrong with you. It is the same for all of us, until we choose something different.

The thing is that when we worry it quickly galvanises energy and draws to it similar energies. Have you ever noticed that when you begin to worry about one thing, then you find other countless things coming into your mind to worry about too?

Perhaps worrying is something that you have done your whole life. It is not something that you like, but maybe it's something that you've decided you cannot change. You may even have a point of view that it is just who you are.

As Gary Douglas, founder of Access Consciousness says, 'Your point of view creates your reality.'

And we get to choose our points of view.

So what if you could choose a different point of view?

I know you can.

So the next time you catch yourself worrying. Be kind to yourself. What you cannot see, you cannot change.

Remember this article and try something from the list below.

1. What other information do I require here?

2. What are the facts of this situation?

3. What is actually true?

4. What can I do today to create a different result?

5. How could this turn out better than I can imagine?

6. Find some ways to change your energy. Susan Grandfield has a great blog all about pressing pause. It is worth checking out.

Once you have pressed pause, you can then consciously choose something else.

And let me leave you with a question...

When faced with a crisis do you deal with it or go into meltdown? Truth.

Hmmm, so what if worry (fear) is just imagined?

Just asking.

A life without worry, what would you do with all that extra energy?

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Worry As a Pandemic Problem

We humans are world class worriers. We worry about everything and everyone. We never seem to be at peace. Many times worry keeps us up at night.

So, we spend a lot of time worrying. Say we spend 2 hours a day worrying. That would mean that we spend 14 hours a week worrying. When we multiply that by fifty-two weeks that would mean that we spend 728 hours a year worrying. Over a lifetime of say 70 years, we worry well over 50,000 hours. Now that's a LOT of worry!

Worry can even make us ill because of the anxiety that it causes. Worry can cause car accidents because we are distracted when driving. Worry can cause families to break up and relationships to be strained. And worry can cause a lot of undue stress for us.

So, why do we worry?

We worry for all kinds of reasons. There is so much uncertainty in our world today. There is financial unrest and political upheaval. There are natural disasters and disease. There is job insecurity and mental illness. Yes, we do have a lot on our plates. But do we have to worry about everything or can we simply relax a bit?

Many of our worries stem from fear and anxiety. We have allowed ourselves to become fearful by what we watch, read and listen to. The evening news is great at making us worry warts.

We also live in constant fear of not having enough, yet we also fear what we consume, and we consume a lot every day. There seems to be a new report every week that tells us about the dangers of eating food our grandparents ate with gratitude.

In fact, it is in the interest of the food industry to exacerbate our anxieties about what to eat. Notice there is always a new product we should not be consuming because it is bad for our health.

Did you notice how many times the advertisers oscillate between whether coffee is good or bad for us? It really becomes a bit ridiculous. Yet, each time the advertisers say that we shouldn't drink coffee, we start worrying, especially if we are coffee drinkers.

How can we take ourselves out of this anxiety and worry state of mind?

Well here are a few tips to consider:

• Realize that worry is a habit. So, the more worry, the more we will worry. However, the opposite is also true-the less you worry the less you will worry.

• Unplug from social media a good 2 to 4 hours a day. This will help you to stop the anxiety from coming into your mind.

• Don't watch the evening news before bed. That way you will lessen your anxiety before bed.

• If you are overwhelmed by an anxiety, write it down. Sometimes, writing down your anxiety in a journal can help you unload it.

• Exercising can also ease anxiety and tension. The more you exercise, the better you will feel.

So, take steps to reduce your worry. You will definitely be happier and healthier as a result. Only we have the power to stop worry in its tracks. And who knows, you may even be a positive role model for someone else.

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The Disempowerment of Money Being Your God (By Kate Strong)

Thinking About Money

In my journey healing PTSD, with its varying symptoms, I have been listening to the voices inside me, and I realised how much of my thought process is around my provision. Worrying about making money, do I have enough money, will I have enough money.

You could say I had a right to think like that, we all do, it's a fact of life. My father's parents died when he was in his early 20s, so he had to provide for himself, so working hard and working your way up was how you made sure you had enough money.

I do the accounts for my son's business and when I relax about my money, I start to worry about his money, to the point of having OCD where I check his bank account app on my phone multiple times a day to see what transactions have occurred.

Relationship To Money

I really allowed myself to feel into this worry and realised my relationship with money is exhausting me, it's part of believing that if I keep on top of things, I will be OK.

My father had a saying that I knew so very well as a child. - "I know men in the ranks, who are going to stay in the ranks. Why? I'll tell you why. Simply because they haven't the ability to get things done."

So I always felt I had to better myself. No time to read a novel when I could be reading a book for my business.

Wrong Way Around

I asked myself, so what if it's not my hard work that allows me opportunities? What if it's the letting go when I switch off at the end of the day that allows abundance to flow in?

What if I had the cycle of work and income all wrong?

What would it feel like to take my hands off the steering wheel and Let Go and Let God?

Source of Supply

In the 1980s when I had a young family, I had this attitude of letting go and letting God as my source of supply, but I was in a relationship where we were in partnership handling our money. I felt more support. I could play around with surrendering, because I felt I had him for back up.

Then in my next relationship I was in charge of managing the money and there wasn't a partnership in the financial decisions. So I had a lot more fear of lack of provision.

Now I am on my own and I provide for myself so if I surrender, I'm mindful that it's just me. Who is there to do the hard work? What if I let go and it all turns to chaos? Isn't letting go and letting God like handing it over to thin air?

Life is so much easier when you have money than not, but what if money was never my security all along?

What if it was the surrendering at the end of my work day that opened me to the flow for my sense of security.

Tight Grip

From the time I reached working age in my teens, I have been in situations where I endured abuse and terrible humiliation for a pay cheque. I believed I had to put up with it, because money was my source, my survival. I was taught to do what it takes to keep your job.

So, I ended up with hypervigilance around money, if I keep on it I will never have to experience such powerlessness, abuse, or poverty ever again.

Letting Go

So in allowing myself more space, allowing my body to spend more time relaxing to switch on the parasympathetic nervous system, it's bought up my fear of what will happen if I don't keep on it, don't keep pursuing my need to get more done, to create more, to make more, to be more.

Impression Management

Our culture's values are such that if you aren't being more, then there's something wrong. We receive messages that maybe we need to heal procrastination, or maybe we have a fear of success?

Most of the photos people post on Facebook are about what they are doing. They may post the highlight of their day, but they aren't taking a photo of themselves doing the dishes, or napping. We can often feel lacking in comparison to other people's apparent busyness and success.

Stress

I'm relaxing into healing high blood pressure, (notice I didn't say working?) and in The Biogenealogy Sourcebook it says that a core issue can be an injustice around a fluid, which can also be money.

What if my obsession about having enough money (which can also transpose to food) is about never having to experience such powerlessness or humiliation around money ever again, that I keep on top of it so it doesn't get away on me. I'm never out of my depth again.

The Power of the Small

When you're always pursuing money as the source of your security, then you don't have time to do things that may actually be the key to your financial success.

I saw a quote today by Kurt Vonnegut *Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and realise they were the big things*.

What if taking time out in your day, to breathe, was the little thing that makes all the difference?

What if lying down and resting is taking charge of your finances?

What would it feel like for you to hand over your finances to a Divine Power?

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Disempowerment-of-Money-Being-Your-God&id=9615447

Self-Sabotage and How to Avoid It

If you are unable to attain your goals, consider this: you may actually be really good at hypnotizing yourself to fail!

Here are 3 ways we psychologically sabotage ourselves:

Firstly, the subconscious part of us will tend to repeat the behavior with the strongest emotional charge associated to it, whether it is "good" or "bad" for us. Usually, if it feels or tastes good, we'll want more.

By the same token, if you're stressed out about biting your nails, then you'll probably end up biting your nails from all the stress. So often we invest more feelings in what not to do or spend time worrying about the problem... and then switching to being in denial that the problem even exists. That is why bad habits are so hard to break; the habits become our story, the one we can't seem to alter. The more we repeat bad habits, the harder it is to break them.

Secondly, as Frenchman Emile Coue once said, "when imagination and reason are at war, imagination always seizes the day." This is how our greatest fears tend to be realized: we allow our imagination to stray into what could go wrong rather than on what could go right. The effort to use creative imagination sometimes feels insurmountable, especially if we are undergoing a period of low energy or recovering from a health setback.

Thirdly, the subconscious part of us does not respond to negative framing. Telling yourself what "not" to do is like trying not to think of a pink elephant, trying "not" to smoke, or trying "not" to eat French fries; what are you thinking about? Pink elephants, smoking, and French fries. So circulating in a negative thought pattern gets you nowhere.

That is why motivation based upon aversion often fails or only works temporarily.

Fear, anxiety, and guilt are stressful and unhealthy motivators anyway, and decisions made under stress are usually not good decisions. Nobody wants to live with a dark cloud over their heads, stuck in a rut.

So how do you hypnotize yourself to succeed?

Well, winners don't win by running away from failure!

Self-Hypnosis and Hypnotherapy can help you stay focused on your success, motivating you to take action in a positive, sustainable way, without dwelling in negativity.

Over time you can begin to intentionally associate and amplify stronger feelings to your goal, eclipsing the unproductive and sometimes overwhelming feelings associated with the unwanted behavior that keep you stuck, giving you the metal edge you need to succeed.

ezinearticles.com/?Self-Sabotage-and-How-to-Avoid-It&id=9741591

Money Is Looking for You

Push the pause button on your life for a moment.

Take a nice deep belly breath in and let it out slowly. Do it again. Slowly... in and out.

Now imagine that the money you've been wanting is like a long-lost lover. There's an emotional connection between you. You've been separated due to some past decisions. You've lost touch and have now come to the realization that you want this lover back in your life.

You may feel like finding your money is like looking for a needle in a haystack. Your money is looking for you, just as you are looking for it. It wants to be with you forever. All you have to do is let it in the door.

You see, it's been knocking and you've been afraid to answer. You've been afraid that it will tease you. You think it'll come in your life and then disappear again. Or you might think you're not worthy of it yet, needing to struggle a bit more. You may think it's just simply too good to be true.

Are you ready to trust that your beloved relationship with money is for real? That it will be loyal to you if you give it a chance? Your money wants to serve you. It sees you as worthy just as you are right now.

You see, this process is very real. If you decide to feel worthy of more money in your life and you literally put out the welcome mat, it will show up.

The decision is all up to you. You either let it in or you don't. You either focus on it being missing from your life or you allow it in, with your arms open and ready to receive.

You'll have to push the pause button on the worrying, concerns, stress and debating about money. This includes all things money related: your job or business, your mate's income, how you spend your money, your future plans, your investments, what other people are making or spending, etc. You've got to stop tripping yourself up with your doubts. There is no logic in worrying; therefore it is not helpful to do so.

Your wealth is dependent on you simply opening up. It wants you as much as you want it. Decide. If there is an action you have to do to let it in, you'll know. It will become very clear to you, and you won't have to figure it out. You know what they call that, right? Yes, it's inspired action. It's all fun and games from that point.

Just like in the movies, your love story can have a happy ending.

What inspired actions will you take towards your happy ending?

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEB SITE?

You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Jeanna Gabellini is a Master Business Coach who assists conscious entrepreneurs to double (and even triple) their profits by leveraging attraction principles, proven strategies and fun. Grab her FREE audio on dialing in your biz here: http://masterpeacecoaching.com/freecd2

http://ezinearticles.com/?Money-Is-Looking-for-You&id=9477140

Tips for Not Worrying About What Others Are Thinking About You

Do you worry a lot about what other people around you are thinking about you? Fear not; here are a few tips to overcome your discomfort. Read on.

· Focus on the long distance and carry your sight as much as your eyes would carry. See the lights, people, cars, shops and trees. It is a way to distract yourself from the mass of people you would worry what they are thinking about you. From time to time, bring your focus on this long distance when you are outside of your home and you won't be worrying at all about others - be it the outside people or someone inside your mind.

· Close your eyes and think of a past memory you would like to recall again and again. Bring this memory in front of you time and again when you want to stop worrying about anybody what they have in mind about you.

· Think of a child either in the past or present. It may be your own child who is little at present or was in your past. Think of the funny activities s/he did that make you smile now. Think how it felt to hold him/her, to see his/her first walk or to enjoy telling them bedtime stories. These little things will help you escape the heavy worry what people in your life are thinking about you.

· Be engrossed reading in a fantastic and interesting novel. That way your attention will hardly divert to the people in your life who you would otherwise worry what they are thinking about you.

· Go on a long drive with your family and enjoy quality time with them. You will be laughing, sharing jokes and enjoying the summer breeze and soft music. There is nothing to worry about what other less significant people in your life are thinking about you.

· Spend quality time being occupied by a hobby such as stamp collecting or coin collecting and lose yourself in it. Don't divert your attention from it for a good many minutes. You allow yourself to lose in it without concentrating your thoughts on the people in your life who you may be worried what they are thinking about you.

· Go to a nearby park and ride on a swing. Let your hair down and let it fly in the gentle breeze. Give yourself a few pushes on the swing and enjoy the ride. Lose yourself completely in the beauty and thrill of the moments. You don't allow yourself to focus on the people in your life who you may be worried what they may be thinking about you.

· How about visiting an art exhibition and letting yourself immerse in some art exhibits for a while? You will certainly like the mysteries as well as the revelations of these if you speculate for a while. As you watch on these, will you remember to care what people in your world are thinking about you? Certainly not.

Summing up, those are some of my great tips in overcoming worry about what other people are thinking about you. Always remember you are not a people pleaser and don't need to bother about others' thoughts about you. Stay calm and carry on with your life. That way you achieve great things - unimaginable yet very much worthy.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Tips-for-Not-Worrying-About-What-Others-Are-Thinking-About-You&id=9603648

Is Life Really This Hard Or Am I Making It This Difficult?

Every day it seems like there are more problems, fewer solutions, less money and more stress. Keeping a positive attitude is not easy when you are on the "lack" side of things. Pessimists always get a bad rap. Is that because what they say is too hard to hear? There is a fine line between the reality of "what is" and a pessimist giving an opinion. An optimist may make you feel better for the moment, however, after that moment passes, you have to deal with the present.

I do believe "manifesting" is viable. It is definitely easier to practice virtually any positive activity while things are going your way. It is easier to give money when you have plenty of it. It is easier to give advice after you are successful. It is easier to talk about weight control after you have accomplished great weight loss. My applause are saved for the brave few that venture out to share when they have not yet aspired to their greatest height. The risk they take is criticism for speaking without a podium and self doubt.

One of the biggest problems I frequently see is the fear that is created by worrying in advance of a situation. All of the "what if scenario's" rolled into a big ball. The more they spin around the fear, the bigger the fear ball becomes. It is physically impossible to cross a bridge until you get to the bridge, yet hours are spent in anguish, worrying about a future event, demanding every possible variable and combination of variables be mentally played out, fretting every possible outcome, before there is a problem. Since that is 100% impossible, all the time and energy given to this endeavor is truly wasted.

For the sake of your health, both mental and physical, stop everything fear based. No decision can be made while you are surrounded by fear. Without the ability to make a decision, no action can be taken. Without any action, you are frozen in time, rendered immobile How long can you stay this way? Some people spend their entire life living in this constant state of fear rather than coming to terms with it. No matter what actually happens, nothing is ever as bad as imagined.

To overcome FEAR, do the following 3 things:

1. Make a list of your biggest fears, cross off all but the 3 things you fear most.

2. What is THE WORST thing that could happen to you if ANY of these 3 fears came true?

3. What is the BEST thing that could happen if NONE of these fears come about?

Now ask yourself, What do you really have to lose? Is it worth taking a chance of failure to achieve success?

http://ezinearticles.com/?Is-Life-Really-This-Hard-Or-Am-I-Making-It-This-Difficult?&id=9624063

Is Life Really Defined By Uncertainty?

Life to me is defined by uncertainty. That's one reason I favor a cautious approach. Fear comes from uncertainty. There are always two sides to any coin.This forms a crucial element of doubt and uncertainty. It was once said- You cannot be certain about uncertainty. To define it any other way, would be quite difficult.

The only thing that's certain is uncertainty. Change creates new tensions and uncertainties in our lives. There are so many events over which we have no control. Can you let go of control? It demands a high level of spiritual fitness. You seek to find the highest level of your spiritual development. This is your enlightenment. As you grow and learn, new ascendancies offer greater rewards.

All you can do is exhale. Breathe deeply. Relentlessly ride on through the cycles of your life. Look for the interconnectivity in all things. You are a part of the network. We are not programmed to embrace uncertainty and fear. It goes against our nature. It triggers our fight or flight instincts. Carefully examine the situation. Put a light into the dark places. In the end, it is all quite simple. You will find your worries are baseless or understandable. All it takes is time and clarity.

People vary in their desire to minimize uncertainty. Those who react by a worrying focus on potential threats and risks. When our bodily reaction is a strong one, we tend to recognize and label it as anxiety, but when it's more subtle, we often fail to see it despite its effect.

We know this from psychological research in thinking styles and perfectionism. Decide whether an issue is important. If it's causing anxiety, do a short meditation. Recognise thought errors that try to pull you into worry. Once we recognize this human tendency, we can learn to challenge or even ignore our worries.

Allow yourself to have negative feelings; they are normal after all. Sitting with uncertainty requires patience. Allow yourself to reflect on what this means to you. Uncertainty is a part of life and it can't be avoided.

The only constant in life is that it will involve change, and try as you may control the future, sometimes all you can do is trust that whatever happens, you can adapt and make the best of it. Replace expectations with plans. When you form expectations, you're setting yourself up for disappointment.

Prepare for different possibilities. Become a feeling observer. Get confident about your coping and adapting skills. This isn't the same as "expect the worst." It's more about assuring yourself that you can handle any difficulty that might come.

This has actually shown to help people manage anxiety.

Finding the solution of the uncertainties in life is like thrashing around to try to get the mud to go away. All this does is stir up more mud. Seek out healthy stress reducers in order to make uncertainty sends us back into the fight of flight mode.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Is-Life-Really-Defined-By-Uncertainty?&id=9682644

Effective Ways to Maintain Minimum Stress

Keep a Cool Head and Count to Three. Are you generally a person who focuses on the past and is easily frustrated? Do you often make rash decisions because of the fluctuation of your emotions? You are probably stressed because you are quick to overreact and explode. Fiery spirits who tend to have limited patience for anything irritating, illogical, or without a purpose can manage stress by working on their patience, temper, and tolerance levels.

• Take a pause and assess the situation. Ask yourself, "is the situation worth getting angry or stressed about?"
• Consider "flight" rather than "fight." Learn that it is acceptable to simply walk away. Fighting is not the answer to every situation, especially if you have already decided it is not worth the anger or stress.
• Vent and move on. If something is bothering you, vent to someone you trust, but do not linger on the past. Be mindful of keeping your emotions bottled up; this can lead to muscle tension.

Accept Life's Imperfections. It is very honorable to want to perform to the best of your abilities. Wanting everyone to do what they are good at consequently promotes efficiency and productivity. However, this type of mindset can also cause you to take on more responsibilities than you can handle. People who strive for perfection can manage stress by focusing on the bigger picture and obsessing over small details a little less.

• Acknowledge that you are stressed. Realize that you cannot fix or do everything. Saying no occasionally assures that you will not become overwhelmed with obligations.
• Limit your multitasking; prioritize tasks by "High, Medium, or Low" priority and try to do one task at a time.
• Accept that there is more than one "right" way of doing things; try to be more open to different approaches and perspectives.

Take Care of Yourself. Worrying too much and feeling like you are wasting your efforts can be detrimental mentally and physically. Sometimes staying positive is easier said than done, especially if you do not feel like you are improving or accomplishing anything. If you find yourself consumed by getting the job done, you can manage stress by focusing on the things that you can control and staying active.

• Do not forget to make time to relax and to sleep; also, eating a healthy diet can reduce stress in most cases.
• Practice a reward system; get as many tasks as you can get done within a set time frame and then reward yourself with something that like, such as an episode of your favorite show.
• Acknowledge every accomplishment, no matter how small. Find a positive affirmation to stay motivated when accomplishments seem scarce. Mottos or mantras are phrases that you tell yourself to cope with whatever situation you are dealing with. These phrases can be as simple as, "don't worry, be happy" or as intentional as, "each step is taking me to where I want to be."

It is never too late to know what causes you stress or what works best for you. Maintain a minimum amount of stress by following these easy stress management tips!

http://ezinearticles.com/?Effective-Ways-to-Maintain-Minimum-Stress&id=9543712

Can Mindfulness Help You Overcome Anxiety?

Do you suffer from anxiety? If you do, you will understand just how debilitating this condition can be.

The worst aspect of anxiety is that it is often well hidden by the sufferer so the people around you are not aware of what is happening to you. What if someone told you that there is an exercise that you can learn to do in just a few minutes that would not only help you cope with your anxiety but also reduce it over time?

Mindfulness is an incredible skill, it is a practice that is taking the world by storm and helping more and more people live in their present.

Anxiety stems from your mind worrying about possible future events or reminiscing over past events. Anxiety makes us believe that dreadful things will happen. But what we don't realize is that while we are stuck worrying about a future that has not yet occurred or a past that we cannot change; the current moment is wasted. We miss out on the beauty and opportunities that are present all around us. What a sad thought.

Many people with anxiety feel that they have no control over their thoughts and this can make them feel frightened and powerless. When you are constantly bombarded by negative ruminations it is difficult to break out of the cycle of anxiety. Instead of allowing us to enjoy the present moment it forces us to live out painful pasts or imagined futures endlessly.

Psychology studies have shown that there are many benefits of mindfulness, especially for those suffering from anxiety. The secret lies in being able to gain control over your thoughts. Mindfulness has been shown to lower anxiety and stress as well as the fatigue that it causes. Over time, it has also been shown to improve memory (which is often negatively affected by anxiety) and improve reaction times.

Is mindfulness the same as meditation? Well, it is similar in some ways. Meditation also teaches you to focus your mind on the present by centering your thoughts on your breathing. However, they do differ because whereas meditation generally requires a quiet atmosphere, mindfulness can be practiced at any time and during any task. The aim of mindfulness is to focus on the senses to help the sufferer experience the moment, free from worry. That is what makes it such a powerful tool in combating anxiety because we all know that anxiety doesn't wait for a quiet moment to strike us.

Damaging and out of control thoughts can rob us of the ability to enjoy our present. Once you have practiced mindfulness you begin to find yourself automatically pushing aside these crushing thoughts and paying attention to your senses and the world around you. This is a skill that could truly change your life and help you break out of anxiety.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Can-Mindfulness-Help-You-Overcome-Anxiety?&id=9407726

How Bad Do You Want It?

"I am the only person in the world I should like to know thoroughly." - Oscar Wilde. Ironically, it bewildering how many know so little about themselves. With the constant rise in expectations, responsibilities, and things to do, the majority of young adults find themselves lost. So over encumbered with the mainstream; through roaring perplexing media and competition that we all find it surprisingly difficult to stop and think for a second "what is it that I really WANT to do". Instead, we're forced to wonder "what is it that I really SHOULD be doing".

Troubled mind, aching heart, sleepless nights; we've all had our fair share. A bad habit of thinking rather than doing, worrying rather than reacting, cowering rather than facing the facts. Alas, change is difficult. We try our best to distract, ergo leaving what is necessary as our last resort. There is nothing scarier than starting from zero, after all, you're reaching "that" age and people are waiting. You've spent your years in secondary education learning about generic subjects, which you've forgotten most of by now. Time's up, you must decide what field of work you will dedicate the rest of your life to with thousands of dollars of your parents' hard-earned money and reputation at risk. You're forced to make a blind choice, and it's all downhill from here.

How do you expect to know what it is you really want to do when you haven't tried anything at all yet? The same applies to extracurricular activities, love, lifestyle, the way you look even, and the list goes on. What diet suits you best? Have you tried them all? What haircut suits you best? Have you thought of getting something other than a buzz cut? What sport brings the best out of you? Are you still trying to fit in with the popular peeps?

Certainty comes with range of experience, range of experience only comes with change. You must be willing to change all that it is you do, whether you like it or not, if you aren't happy with how things are going (And even if you are! Maybe there's something even better out there for you?). You may feel like you're hunky-dory with whatever it is you're doing, but does it excite you? Do you wake up and sleep thinking about it? Do you have a constant urge to know more about it? You only have yourself to blame, because mom isn't there anymore to force you to go to those violin classes, and dad isn't there anymore to force you to try something new to eat.

It's never too late to try the new and it's never too early to think of something new to do. You don't know what something is like until you've tried it, so for your sake, go out and try everything! And fail at everything! You won't know what you're happiest with until you've failed enough. Failure is a prerequisite to better understanding the things you do, and it's only until you find out you enjoy failing at something that you've found something worth your time. Success is only there to skew your path, cause disruption, and slow you down. Do what you love, and success will be sure to follow.

How bad do you want change? Are you miserable? Are you suffering enough? Are the cigarettes and Netflix shows not cutting it out for you anymore? Then do something about it. You're so far deep into your comfort zone that the thought of getting up is agonizing. To which I ask again, how bad do you want it?

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-Bad-Do-You-Want-It?&id=9434047

Free Yourself From Debilitating Fears (By Andrea Kellerman)

Leanne Belling, who suffered from flight anxiety has overcome her fears and feels like a new person now.

Leanne's story: "I never had a problem with flying, day or night, no matter the weather or distance. A few years ago, I was on a flight from Johannesburg to Durban, the flight was scheduled to leave at 7pm, but due to the severe storm and rain we were delayed by an hour, and departed around 8pm. At the time, I was not worried, I boarded the plane, we took off and I assumed we would be home in an hour.

The take-off was very bumpy due to the weather and 15 minutes into the flight, the Captain announced that we needed to remain in our seats as there was a bad electrical storm ahead and they were going to fly us around it. The flight at that stage was very turbulent, we went through many air pockets and were being shaken around quite badly with lots of lightning bolts all around us.

There were some luggage compartments that opened with bags falling out, resembling something out of a horror movie. There was a really loud bang and massive shudder through the plane, it was suddenly very hot and the air hostesses started running around frantically and were looking rather pale themselves. It was at this point the fear of God was instilled in me and I realised we had a problem. The Captain came back on and announced that were descending to 10,000 feet as we had lost cabin pressure and that anyone wearing a neck tie or jersey should remove and loosen the items, they recommended the bags to assist with breathing. I suddenly realised that this "could be it" and I may never see any of my loved ones again.

Everyone on the plane was in a panic at this stage and everyone was hysterical, myself included. Strangers were holding hands and praying in support for one another in the terrifying moments where none of us knew if we would survive it. Once we had descended to 10,000 feet, they proceeded to go through the emergency landing brace position. The rest of the flight was really rough, and seemed like it took forever for us to reach Durban. Total flying time 1 hour 45 minutes.

On arrival at the Durban Airport (old Durban airport), we were cleared for landing, as we descended to the runway, all I remember seeing were rows and rows of emergency vehicles, ambulances and fire engines. The landing was extremely rough, and when the plane came to a stop, everyone on board clapped and cheered for the pilot. The plane was parked and we were all ushered out the back and around the opposite side to the engine that was struck by lightning with beacons demarcating the wing which looked damaged. I was so happy to see my mom and I sobbed like a baby when I hugged her and held onto her.

Since that unfortunate flight, I have battled with a serious struggle whenever I needed to fly for business, to the point where in a period of about 8 or more years I have never flown on that airline again. In some instances I deliberately missed a flight or two in the hope I wouldn't have to go. My doctor prescribed tranquilisers that were to calm me down before a flight, they didn't work so I used to have a few drinks as well no matter the time of day, just to gain enough courage to actually set foot on a plane. Before I flew I used to be on edge for weeks before the actual flight, a complete nervous wreck, and drive everyone around me insane. On the day of the flight I was very teary and nervous, I battled with anxiety, sweaty palms, uncontrollable panic attacks and uncontrollable tears.

Once actually on the plane, I would do random things, like check the condition of the outside of the plane, touch the plane as I entered to feel for myself that it was solid, ask the air hostesses what the weather was like and whether or not we were expecting a turbulent flight, their answer usually sent me into a panic. I would sit down and fasten my seat belt and then proceed to grasp the arm rests while my heart pounded so hard that it felt as though it would jump out of my chest. My hands were shaky and sweaty, I had this uncomfortable tingly sensation down my throat and neck with a paralysing effect on my arms. So bad that I would keep saying I want to get off.

Any sounds in the plane or on the outside prior to take off would make me start crying as the fear of the flight getting closer got worse. I could never envision arriving on the other side safely, every time I left my family to fly I would imagine that I was not going to make it and it would be the last thing I ever did. As the engines started I would end up in a complete panic and sob my way through the take off. Every time there was a bump or noise I would get such a fright and my heart would pound even faster. By the time the drinks were served I would ask for 2 hunters dry or 2 bottles of wine and drink them as fast as I could, on top of the tranquilisers and alcohol I had already consumed, to further "numb away" the fear. Whenever we landed I couldn't wait to get off and felt the most immense relief when my feet touched the ground.

I ended up in a position at work that required me to fly very often instead of the usual twice a year, beginning with 18 flights in 7 weeks on all kinds of planes to all kinds of airports big and small. After the initial flights I would be required to fly 2 to 3 times per month to Johannesburg and Cape Town. I was in a complete tail spin to the point where I started going for interviews as the thought of flying that much scared me to death. Added to this, I faced continuous ridicule from my fellow colleagues, people think that having a fear of flying is silly, they'd laugh and make a mockery of it and me, which makes it even worse to face or talk about.

A friend of mine suggested that I try hypnotherapy. So a week before the 18 flight marathon began I booked my first appointment. I met her and we went through all the details of what exactly it was that scared me and how I felt when I was overcome with fear. During my first hypnotherapy session we recorded the actual hypnotherapy part onto a CD, and I religiously listened to it every night before the first flight.

I was very nervous before the first flight as I had never used hypnotherapy and I didn't know how I would react on that flight. It was difficult, but I managed to fly with no medication or alcohol. I was still sweaty, heart pounding, getting a fright with every bump and worrying I would not arrive safely, but there was a huge difference even from session 1. I continued with my CD and booked another session. I became calmer, could book my flights without having a panic attack, was able to check in feeling calm, got on the plane without feeling that I needed to get off and managed my emotions so much better.

On about the 5th or 6th flight I realised that I did not need any form of medication or alcohol anymore and I realised that I was making good progress. Every flight I took from there on was a step towards my recovery. I didn't need to drink, I chose to drink and I chose to drink only half at a normal pace.

Slowly but surely with each and every flight, my fear diminished and my hands stopped sweating, I didn't cry any more or get nervous with every bump or sound. I slowly worked my way through all of the issues and the reactions one by one over a 6 month period, and now I don't worry about flying, I don't touch the plane or ask the hostesses about the weather, I do not worry whether it is day or night, I do not pay attention to the actual weather. None of those things bother me anymore, and I find that I now speak to people and say, I used to be scared of flying, but now I actually enjoy it.

On the 22 April 2016 marked my 6 months of hypnotherapy, I snuggled in with my pillow and blankie and I fell asleep for about half an hour. This was the final hurdle that we have been trying to overcome, and I did it.

On the 17 May 2016, I will be boarding a plane on the airline that I had a terrible experience with and I will be facing and conquering my ultimate fear. The ticket is booked and I am feeling confident about it. I am looking forward to achieving my ultimate goal.

Hypnotherapy is an amazing tool to choose and if you really do want to overcome your fears, I recommend you give it a try. It is easy, non-invasive and it has changed my life forever. I can just recommend it to anyone who has fears, want to achieve goals and is serious about having a better life."

http://ezinearticles.com/?Free-Yourself-From-Debilitating-Fears&id=9429193