Search Within - Define Your Own Success

Most people develop perceptions and attitudes as dictated by the society they live in. Individual's own personality and views become victim to the societal pressures of what is success and what is not. Defining success is one such causality. It is very easy to succumb to one's own surrounding and end up developing definition of success based on what others think of success.

What does one do to stand up and define our own success? It was Abraham Lincoln who said "Always bear in mind that your own definition of success is more important than any other one thing." This article attempts to provide some leads on defining your own success.

When you ask others what success means and you're likely to hear a variation of these answers:

• Fancy car or two - Mercedes, BMW, Lexus

• Nice house - Big, with a swimming pool, in a gated community

• Respectable corporate job - something worthy of bragging about

• Attractive spouse

• Obedient and smart children

Those things are fine if they're of your own choosing. But, if you take the time to think about it, your definition of success might be: Single, traveling the world, running my own business from a laptop, having adventures each day, and wearing flipflops at least eight hours each day. A person with this definition of success would be miserable in the first scenario.

Persons who stand up to the society and develop their own framework of success would mostly be high in creative field, be it sports, literature, business or public service. They are the ones who generally abandon set ideas of success and define something that is satisfying to them, that create value for themselves and people around them.

Such people will never be the ones to accomplishing something that doesn't appeal to them in the end.

All we have to remember - to define our own success - is what Anthony Robins said "There is a powerful driving force inside every human being that, once unleashed, can make any vision, dream, or desire a reality."

So how do we avoid disappointment and create our very own definition of success!

As reflected in Robert Finch's book Great Objectives, it is quite common for ordinary people to adopt such mottos as "healthy, wealthy, and wise" as aims for life. But we know that having more than one such value can lead to conflicts. It was realized that we should not try to achieve definite objectives, but instead look to some other procedure, such as a variety of evolution, to shape our objectives.

In that case, we make plans and evaluate them, as we proceed. We should use our values for guideposts.

One critical method is to seek self-introspection and ask yourself these questions:

1. What legacy do I want to leave for my children and the world? At the end of your life, what do you want to look back upon? Is it wealth and a vast business empire? Do you want to leave a string of good works? Do you want to look back on a life full of adventures?

• How will you have wanted to spend your time?

• What financial resources do you want to leave behind?

• What do you want to be known for?

2. What are my values? A lifetime spent living your values will be fulfilling. Most people have a vague notion of what's important to them, but few take the time to think about it carefully. Pull out a piece of paper and make a list of your values.

3. What do I want to do? Make a list of all the things you want to see and do. Everything from skydiving to walking on the Great Wall of China. Write it down.

4. What type of life do I want to experience? You might desire a conventional marriage and six children with a white picket fence in the suburbs. Or you might like to live in a Manhattan condo by yourself and take full-advantage of the nightlife for the first 20 years of adulthood.

5. What it will take for me to feel successful? Imagine various scenarios and determine what would make you feel successful. Is it living in a cabin in the woods with few responsibilities? Or living in a 15,000-square foot penthouse? Imagine various careers and lifestyles. Which one feels like success to you?

6. What if no one else would ever know? The idea of owning a Ferrari might feel like success, but what if no one else would ever know you owned it? Would you still feel successful? An ideal version of success wouldn't involve the opinions of others.

• Search for a version of success that's meaningful to you, even if others are unaware of your possessions and accomplishments.

There is no universal definition of success. It's important not to fall into the trap of trying to impress your friends and family. Develop a version of success that is meaningful for you, regardless of society's values. You might find that your version of success is much more enjoyable and easier to attain.

How do you define success? Your own definition will require you to like what you do and how you do it. Will you like the person you are becoming?

http://ezinearticles.com/?Search-Within---Define-Your-Own-Success&id=9724182

Author of My Life

Life is unfair at times but that's a given. We all struggle in life whether it's finances, personal tragedy and loss, in our careers or simply mental or physical struggles which can be even tougher but the one given is you have the choice on how you respond.

Whoever said, "life is like a box of chocolates, you never know which one you get" is full of crap. Sayings like that and I've been dealt a bad hand or I have bad luck are what's called mind deceivers. They are conjured up in your mind, meant to console you when you're going through the struggles in life. That is when you start believing your own lie and soon you own it. Once you own it, it becomes a part of your very fiber.

You see, we all have stories, all different, some seem worse than others but in the end... they are all stories and each story is told by an author. You are the author of your own life. No one but you can write your story or change your story. 

Putting down pen to paper... you have control of how your story ends. Whether you want to write it or not, your story already started-our life are the chapters in between the hard-bound covers. But the question you need to ask yourself is how will you write your story?

You are the one who breathes air from every thought, into every letter, word and sentence. You write the plot, set the tone and the mood. If something feels out of place or doesn't align with the illustration, then you and only you need to change the script. You decide who and what will fill each page in your life's chapters. You surround your life with characters that will inspire, motivate and spur you to do great and unimaginable things.

If you're suffering with letting go of the past, just know that your past is a part of who you are. It molds you and inspires you to change the direction of where your life will end.

No one knows the outcome, not even you but how you write out the next few pages will determine the direction and climax your life will take. So, the next time you are sitting there wondering why your life is the way it is, just remember all you have to do is keep on writing and decide how you want your story to end.

Thank you and continue to be the "Author of Your Life!"

http://ezinearticles.com/?Author-of-My-Life&id=9692595

When Is The Best Time to Quit Your Job

Ever thought of quitting your job? Well, most people have harbored similar thoughts too. However much we are told to hold on for better days, there comes a time when you can no longer hold on to that job. There are numerous reasons as to why you would be justified to quit your jobs and look for greener pastures. Most of the reasons for quitting mostly emanate from the workplace.

Best time to quit

Before making that decision to quit, it will take time and patience. However, it is important to have a good enough reason to quit lest you remain jobless after giving up your opportunity. Below is an overview on the best time to quit your job.

If you are not appreciated

If nobody recognizes and appreciates your effort, you will certainly feel unappreciated. Instead of complements, your efforts are met with negative criticism. With such a job, you will never achieve satisfaction in what you do. As a matter of fact, you will develop hatred for your career. The surest way to avoid such an experience is quitting that job and find work in a place where your effort will count.

If restructuring is done regularly

If a company restructures from time to time, it is evident that there are management issues. If the management is not solid, this could spell doom for the company. You do not want to work in a company that is on the verge of collapsing. Do you? If you are not sure about the strategic plan of your company, you should reconsider your position as it is evident the future is dull there.

If you are not making any advancement

Everyone wants to develop their careers and some companies might hinder that. If you find yourself serving at the same capacity for years despite giving your best, it is crystal clear that the company does not appreciate you. It is only best that you quit and find a new job where your effort will be recognized and awarded accordingly.

Constant movement

If you notice a continuous exit by employees especially the good ones, it is proof that they are not satisfied there. Additionally, a persistent exodus is more than enough proof that there are better places to work. You too should find those greener pastures instead of waiting to be another disgruntled employee.

Conclusion:

Before you call it quits, you should have thought about the matter carefully. In addition, ensure that you only take up a job that guarantees you satisfaction in all aspects.

http://ezinearticles.com/?When-Is-The-Best-Time-to-Quit-Your-Job&id=9423502

Just Because Something Isn't Wrong Doesn't Make It Right

Wrong - incorrect, mistaken, in error, erroneous, inaccurate, inexact, imprecise.

Right - just, fair, proper, good, upright, righteous, virtuous, moral, ethical.

Now that we have that out of the way let's dig a little deeper into the concepts of right and wrong and how we approach each choice.

There are several ways to look at right and wrong - in relationships, careers, money, friends, activities etc. Let's look at just three;

Careers - So, you have a job offer and it meets all of your criteria - benefits, salary, requirements, roles, expectations etc. but for some internal reason it just doesn't feel right. You consider - I could do worse or what's the worst that could happen - I can handle that. But, again for some reason which you can't explain it just doesn't feel right. So, what do you do - take the offer or wait for something better?

Accepting it would by all appearances not seem wrong but is it right? That's the question.

Or, you are being offered a promotion but it will require moving yourself and or your family to a new state and starting over. Yes, the position and salary increase are what you have always wanted and felt you deserve but again, something inside you has you questioning this offer. You can't put your finger on it as it seems right on the surface but then again what are the direct and indirect short and long term consequences on your family, friends etc.? And are they worth it? So many questions. So much to consider.

Let me ask you in hindsight have you ever made a choice or decision that you thought was right given what you knew at the time and it turned out poorly? Welcome to the club. And by the way - if you haven't sooner or later you will.

Relationships - So you just met Mr. or Ms. perfect, right or just what you have been looking for your entire life and you decide to throw yourself into the relationship 100% but over time you realized that there were signs or early signals that you overlooked that now are becoming deal breakers. Okay - there are millions of single people in the US and the chances are that you can or will ever meet 1% of them is unlikely so when you feel you have found your one and true Soul Mate you are all in. Be careful - could there possibly be just a few others out there who might or could be right or better?

Again, let me ask you in hindsight have you ever made a poor relationship choice and realized it long after you had invested a great deal of time, energy, commitment and even resources? Welcome to the same club folks

How about life in general - I could go on for pages about the numerous poor choices, decisions etc. I have made during my life journey but I won't bore you as I'm not looking for your pity. Let me just say that sooner or later we all make decisions and choices we think are good because they are not wrong but this doesn't make them right. The answer is simple make the choice and do whatever you can to make it the right choice and if that is not possible - walk away.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Just-Because-Something-Isnt-Wrong-Doesnt-Make-It-Right&id=9399683

Breaking Bad Habits: How to Stop Agreeing to Everything

It’s funny sometimes when you think about the things people ask you to do vs. what you actually want to do. You know what I mean? Do you ever find yourself saying yes and agreeing to participate in activities or events when you really don’t think you’re the best person for the job or perhaps you actually have other plans? Unfortunately, it happens to the best of us. We don’t want to let our friends or family down. We want to get ahead in our careers – and that results in pressure to say yes to every request. We don’t want to miss out on something fun, even when we know we have other, more important tasks to accomplish. Whatever the case may be, learning to say no is an essential quality for maintaining a balanced and healthy life. Let’s take a look at a few different circumstances and the ways you can come from a place of no, yet still remain positive and be seen as a contributor.

With your kiddos. This one should actually be the easiest, however it often feels like the most difficult in your ongoing commitment to keeping them happy and well-adjusted. Sometimes when we get busy in other aspects of life – work and other commitments – the guilt sets in. And, suddenly you find yourself saying yes to requests from your kids that really should be a hard and fast no. While it may be easier said than done, you have to remind yourself that even when you want to make them feel happy in that moment, you’re ultimately looking out for their long-term well-being. So, next time they want to stay up late night after night or your older children are begging for a later curfew – remind yourself: it’s ok to stick to your beliefs and maintain a sense of structure.

At work. Sometimes at work it’s easiest just to say yes. You know those moments – when it’s just faster and more simple to do it yourself. You’re concerned that if you don’t keep everyone happy all of the team you’ll be overlooked for a promotion or you’ll be seen as a slacker. Here’s the thing: you won’t. On the flip side when you lay the groundwork for your limitations and you do an excellent job training your team to get things done, you’ll be seen as an effective manager who understands the power of delegation. And, that is way to move up that ladder. When you stretch yourself too thin at work, when you become stressed and nervous, it’s noticeable and many times can be pretty unbecoming. When you’re organized, poised and you position your team for success – that gets positively noticed.

With your friends. It’s all too easy to become that friend. The one who says yes to everything, picks up the tab at every restaurant and plans all the get-togethers. But every once-in-a-while, it’s OK to have another friend extend that same sense of love and friendship to you. Here’s the tough part: if you’ve always been the one to keep everything going, it’s tough for a group of friends (or even one friend) to make that transition to picking up where you left off. You’re going to have to have that tough conversation, letting him or her (or the group) know where you stand and what’s bugging you. If you approach this from a place of love, it will be well-received. And, more than likely, your friend(s) didn’t even realize how you felt. Bottom line: honesty is the best policy.

With yourself. This relationship is the most challenging of all. The pressures we instill on ourselves to do everything, be everything and overachieve are the toughest to overcome. But, here’s the thing: do you really need to say yes to everything, be the chairperson for every event, attend every sports game and volunteer all the time just to know you’re being the best person you can be? Probably not. Will you become resentful of this overly busy and over-extended schedule if you do commit to everything? Yes. Turns out, being happy and fully content is rooted in a place of balance – and achieving balance means finding time for yourself….sometimes, doing nothing at all. And, that is OK.

Do you find yourself overextending and saying yes to way too much? Can you instill some of the tactics above the next time you start to feel overextended?

http://www.lorensworld.com/life-work/breaking-bad-habits-how-to-stop-agreeing-to-everything/

10 Things You Should Never Put Up With

Many of us have learnt to go through life, ‘putting up’ with things. Aside from the obvious negatives that we have to grin and bear in life, such as bad weather, traffic jams or paying taxes, there is no reason for the grey fog of ‘tolerance’ that we have allowed to settle over our lives.

Our tolerance to the intolerable has spread into every area of our lives. We tolerate unhealthy relationships, we put up with careers that leave us practically sobbing every time the alarm goes off in the morning. Worst off all; we make do with a life void of passion or any fun.

As a society, we seem to have adopted this ‘make do’ attitude in the belief that life is hard. Mistakenly believing that nobody ever gets everything their own way, and in order to enjoy happiness in one way, we must sacrifice it in lots of others. This belief is not only depressing, but also very much unfounded. The world is there for our pleasure and enjoyment. We are not meant to trudge drearily through life, but to excel in it!

Throw away your ‘put up, shut up’ attitude at once! Remember, every moment of your life is not to be tolerated but thrived in and enjoyed. Start living your life today in the best way for you and take a look at the list below, to see if you recognise any of the things that you have been wrongly ‘putting up’ with.

1. A Life Without Passion

How can we recognise a life lived without passion? When we are living passionlessly, our lives can seem difficult; nothing comes to us easily, we are depleted of energy, we rarely experience moments of true happiness and we doubt our abilities and choices. A life lived with passion on the other hand, is one full of fun and joy! We feel good about our choices and confident in what we do – good things effortlessly come our way. As you can see, the differences between a life lived with passion and one without are huge. Living a life aligned with your passions is one of the most important things that you can ever do. So, live a life that you love and all of life’s doors will open to you.

2. Damaging Relationships

Damaging or draining relationships should have no part in your life. We are who we surround ourselves with – therefore, we should only surround ourselves with those that uplift, inspire, support, encourage and love us. If you are currently harbouring relationships in your life that leave you unhappy, worthless or exhausted then you need to let them go. Sometimes, cutting all ties with someone may seem like an incredibly hard or even impossible thing to do. More often than not, we will worry about hurting the other person’s feelings by letting them go, regardless of how they may make us feel. But ask yourself – do you love yourself more than this relationship? You should do. You are the most important person in your life, and in order to be happy and succeed you need relationships that nurture and support you.

3. Clutter

In a consumerist society, we have become the kings and queens of clutter! We shop to pass the time, to keep up with the latest fashions and fads; but most importantly of all, we shop to distract ourselves from our troubles. The problem with being a shopaholic nation is that with time, our purchases turn from something that we once enjoyed to unnecessary clutter that is forever getting in our way. A cluttered environment does indeed mean a cluttered mind. So, throw away your stuff. As that is exactly all that it is – stuff. Once it is out of your way, you can once again have the energy to get creative and motivated for more important purposes.

4. A Life Without Fun

What is your fun to work balance looking like at the moment? If the scales are tipping more towards work and responsibility, then its time you started living a little! Career and financial status may be of great importance to you, but once you begin to let your ‘play time’ slip into non-existence, you can soon begin to feel the repercussions. Life is there for our enjoyment. Be sure to invest enough time into you and your sense of fun; laugh often with friends, spend time enjoying your passions, travel. Fill your days with fun and you will find that you become more productive in other areas of your life.

5. Excuses

What is worse, the regret of failure or the regret of never trying? Sometimes when we take a chance on something we fail; however, it is from these failures that we learn important life lessons that help us to succeed the next time we try. Alternatively, when we never give something a go, all we are left with are the ‘what ifs?’ and the ‘should of, would of, could of’s’. If a fear of failure or change has been holding you back now for quite some time, it is time to start chucking out the excuses. Excuses can get you absolutely nowhere in life, they only hold you back. Make a decision today – say ‘no more!’ to excuses and begin pushing yourself to greater things.

6. Bad Health

Our bodies are the only thing in this world that we are born with and will die with. It is what permits us to enjoy this one-off opportunity known as life and do the things that make us happy. Therefore, when we abuse or misuse our bodies with junk food, cigarettes, excessive amounts of alcohol, drugs or lack of exercise – we begin to look and feel bad, preventing us from living life to its fullest. There are so many chances that your body can offer you before the damage is irreversible. Therefore, treat your body like the temple that it is. Imagine that there are no tomorrows and start taking better care of yourself, today.

7. Negativity

If you want to enjoy your day to day life in positivity, and with a great big smile on your face – then you should show absolute zero tolerance towards negativity. When we allow negativity into our lives or thoughts, we leave ourselves no room for creativity or successful thinking. The energy of our thoughts and emotions directly impact what we come to experience in our day to day lives. So, try and turn a blind eye to any negativity that tries to permeate your mind. Instead, turn your attention to the things, people, places and past times that uplift and fill you with positivity.

8. An Unfulfilling Career

We spend the majority of our lives working, so why waste that time doing something that makes us unhappy? It is because our work consumes such a large portion of our time, that it can have such a dramatic impact on all other areas of our life; our relationships, our health, our finances. So, when we get our job choices wrong, other areas of our life can begin to go wrong too. We all have to make certain career choices out of necessity at some point or other during our lives. However, if you have had to settle for a job role that you find unfulfilling in order to pay the bills, then just be sure that you have a plan of action ready for when your next opportunity arises. Don’t settle for anything less than what you love. A happy and fulfilling career is usually possible when we work with our passions. If this is impossible for now, make the necessary changes to ensure that you are ready for when it is possible.

9. Financial Worries

As anybody suffering with money worries would tell you – financial problems can turn your life upside down. It is an unfortunate fact that money does help the world to go round. Or rather, it can help you to do the things that you want without stress or worry. If you want to live a happy life of non-existent stress, then your financial worries have to go. Yes, cash flow problems tend to be an unavoidable part of life. However, it is your attitude to these occasional money blips that can mean the difference between you tearing your hair out or enjoying a comfortable state of Zen-like bliss.

If you have financial worries – relax. There is nothing too big that you cannot handle. Get a part-time job, sell some of your unused stuff, and begin applying for higher paid jobs. Some things in life are not worth the stress.

10. Living Outside Of Your Values

Are you currently living your truth? A life without integrity to yourself or your values is always going to be an unhappy one. When we make the mistake of living outside of our values, we find ourselves continually fighting an uphill batter – nothing comes easily, we feel guilty, our energy and happiness deflates dramatically. It is only when we choose to live in alignment with who we truly are and what we value most in life, that we become the very best that we can be and enjoy true happiness.

http://www.thelawofattraction.com/10-things-you-should-never-put-up-with/

If the Brontosaurus Can Make a Comeback, So Can You

Even dinosaurs can make a comeback.

Many of us get to a point in our careers or our businesses where we somehow feel irrelevant, where markets or people around us seem to be evolving beyond our abilities, knowledge or desire. We get stuck, and, if we're not careful, we can be left behind. Made extinct, even.

Next time you feel that way, think of the triumph of the Brontosaurus. 

The Brontosaurus is back. Despite its popular lore, the heyday of the Brontosaurus was short. Named first in 1879, this gigantic dinosaur was essentially merged into the less-romantic-sounding Apatosaurus by 1903. It stayed in the popular imagination, making burgers for the Flintstones and showing up in the dinosaur books I read as a kid in the 1970s, but the paleo community had moved on to other matters, like whether dinosaurs were birds and whether asteroids wiped them out. For the poor Brontosaurus, the science was settled.

I never thought that was fair. The Brontosaurus was always a rockstar. First, there was its size. There was nothing larger. This scale gave it its name: "Brontosaurus" comes from the Greek words for thunder and lizard. One almost feels the ground vibrating imagining this Thunder Lizard lumbering around our prehistoric jungles.

But, despite being the biggest, it wasn't the baddest. There was a sophistication to the Brontosaurus, a vegan millions of years before Brooklyn made it cool. This was a gentle giant, the kind of creature that would innocently order a kale salad at Smashburger while its carnivorous friends were snapping the necks of everything that moved.

Yet its end was tragic. While all dinosaurs became extinct, science decreed it was the Brontosaurus alone that had no right to exist. The name was struck from books, museum exhibits and the popular imagination.

To me, the fate of the Brontosaurus became emblematic of what could happen to us all, particularly in our lives and work. In our own ways, everyone struggles against personal and professional extinction, striving to stay current, stay inspired, stay relevant. No one wants to become a dinosaur, and it seems the worst dinosaur to become was the most beloved, the Brontosaurus.

Yet, science is never settled. There are very few true scientific laws particularly because science demands that we question everything. And innovation helps lead to new discovery, something entrepreneurs know well. That's what saved the Brontosaurus from the bone pile. Using new technologies, scientists analyzed 477 different attributes of the biggest dinosaurs and over the past five years and determined that Brontosaurus is real. 

Not only that, but there were actually three different kinds: Brontosaurus excelsus, which is the one we knew about, but also Brontosaurus parvus and Brontosaurus yahnahpin. Take that, Apatosaurus.

It isn't a stretch to find inspiration in the journey of the Brontosaurus. Time, technology and persistence can revive businesses, careers and relationships. It only takes one or two people with an idea and a commitment to turn science -- and markets -- on their heads and prove everyone wrong. If the much-maligned Brontosaurus can make a comeback, you have no excuse not to make one of your own. Nothing is assured in life, but all things are possible.

Now, if someone can just make Pluto a planet again...

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/244804