True Success Can Be Duplicated (By Jeffery Davis)

I have spent many years of my career in the sales industry (Real Estate and Insurance) and when you find people doing extremely well the tendency is to want to experience the same level of success. The good news is that desire is not only appropriate but reasonable. The bad news is when you want to follow in another person's footsteps the path is not clearly outlined. This makes it very hard to obtain.

Think about things we love to duplicate; a recipe for example. KFC chicken does not taste like Popeyes or El Pollo Loco because the recipes used vary in their ingredients. It's all chicken but the taste is different. Success is the same way. Many people experience success but the recipe they use is not the same.

The reason true success must be duplicated is if you are successful today but cannot repeat the process tomorrow then your success ends. No one wants that. Winners like winning and want to win over and over and over again. To do that you must have a way to duplicate yesterday's success so you can repeat it over and over again. If not you will become known as a "one hit wonder" who actually experienced success by luck not skill.

There are many programs on the market that claim to offer a system for success. These systems are marketed by very smart guys who focus on the process and the steps. Many time their credibility can be summed up in "I was very successful in this process and I have developed this system to help you enjoy the same success." The only problem is most people who develop systems designed to educate do not have an idea of how people learn differently and very few people have ever found success by reading a program filled with forms.

To duplicate success a system is needed. But the one to develop that system must not only be the one who has experienced success but the one who has analyzed the steps necessary to become a success, knows the mentality associated with obtaining that success and can lead others to follow the exact footsteps they took to get there. It is not possible to create the success of others when you leave out vital steps in the learning process. However when there is a real observation of the principles that cause any of us to become successful the steps are clearer and can be imitated by others.

https://ezinearticles.com/?True-Success-Can-Be-Duplicated&id=10365475

The Last Great Confidence Secret

Thank you for reading my article The Last Great Confidence Secret, and because you are reading this I know you are a fellow seeker of more confidence, and that excites me.

As you are a fellow seeker of more confidence, it's all right for me to reveal to you the Last Great Confidence Secret. This is a secret that never quite gets revealed by confidence "scholars". I've read hundreds of articles on confidence, read book after book, and tried to stay awake watching video after video on confidence (most online confidence videos really need to be better thought out) and they never reveal this secret.

I know that the Last Great Confidence Secret is both going to thrill you, but also disappoint you.

So what is the Last Great Confidence Secret?

Without further waffle I can reveal that the Last Great Confidence Secret is:-

There is no secret to being confident!

"What" you say! There must be some:

- Magic,

- Trick,

- Secret,

- Formula,

- System, or

- Key to being confident? There must be!

Sorry, there is not. If you ever want to be confident, you should stop looking for such things - right now.

The secret to confidence is that it's a skill just like any other. A skill that can be researched, studied, learnt, memorised and practiced.

I told you you'd be disappointed didn't I?

But here is the thrilling part.

But the fact that confidence is nothing special and is just a boring bog standard skill, is really good news for you, because you are an expert at gaining and becoming very good at boring bog standard skills. Just think about it. Everything you know now, and I mean everything, at one time or another you didn't know anything about these skills and had no experience in them. Now you are an expert in these things.

If you put your mind to it - very soon you will be an expert at confidence, and will as a result - be very confident.

And now to the practical part.

I hope by reading the above you've:

1 - Realised that confidence is no more than a skill like any other skill, so it can be learnt, studied, and practiced, and

2 - Decided that you want to and will practice this skill of confidence.

If you have come to the above realisation and decision, the next bit is for you.

What you need to do now is to ensure that you study confidence every day for the next year. You may think that doing this is hard, but it's not. As long as you set it up in the right way. And I am now going to show you how to set it up.

All you need is a bit of spare paper, and a pen (or an electronic equivalent).

What you need is a list of every day for the next year, including today. Either create or print off a readymade calendar. I usually use an A4 sheet of paper, which I print out columns as the months and horizontal rows as the days in each month.

Once you have this divide the year into quarters. I usually do this by getting four coloured pens and outline each quarter in a different colour.

Once you've done this, all you need to do is:

In the 1st Quarter - just spend a minimum of 5 minutes researching confidence each day.

In the 2nd Quarter - just spend a minimum of 10 minutes researching confidence each day.

In the 3rd Quarter - just spend a minimum of 15 minutes researching confidence each day.

In the 4th Quarter - just spend a minimum of 20 minutes researching confidence each day.

And each day once you've done it, just mark your sheet (I do this by filling in the day with green highlighter).

Doing this is really easy to start, as five minutes is roughly the time it will take you to websearch then read one webpage on confidence.

If you miss a day, don't stress about it, just carry on the next day. All I do is mark the day on my sheet with a red highlighter, and forget about it.

If you do this and use such as sheet, I guarantee that in one year's time you'll be:

(1) Much more confident than you are today,

(2) Be set up for a lifetime of increasing confidence.

So before you do anything else, and I mean, do it NOW,

(1) Decide that you'll do this,

(2) Produce your sheet, and

(3) Get your first five minutes done, and marked off.

If you do this you will have discovered the Last Great Confidence Secret.

https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Last-Great-Confidence-Secret&id=9742143

Are You Restricting Your Child's Creativity?

People label creativity as an innate talent, approaching it with a self-discouraging attitude that silently speaks 'I just don't have it." or "I don't know." This mindset is so contagious that children catch onto it quick. The last thing a child needs is to be told that he or she can't do something. The truth is creativity is not a talent, but a skill. It can be learned, developed, fostered, and mastered.

If you're questioning the importance of creativity, here's why it's so significant that creativity is an essential component in expression, happiness, and success. Being creative allows the individual to be more flexible when encountering problems, which will naturally pave different avenues for the person to approach the issue. Now that we've understood the nits and grits of creativity, here's how you can foster this precious skill in children.

Children require resources to express themselves creatively. They require tools, toys, and objects to fumble around with. They also need an adequate amount of space and time. What this translates to is that your patience with them is absolutely necessary; because you're going to be cleaning up after their creative mess! The best playthings for your children to foster creativity includes art materials, building materials, blocks, or even Lego (just be sure your child doesn't swallow any!).

As a parent or an adult, you automatically become a role model in a child's eyes. Be as encouraging and participative as you can be when you're experiencing a child's imaginative behaviour. The worst thing you can do is to enforce too many rules during play. The result will be your child feeling restricted and controlled, which discourages them from doing anything extraordinary. Instead, allow your child to make mistakes and guide them to seeing the value in making mistakes. Parents focus too much on correcting their children's behaviour that they fail to realise that they're cultivating a negative perspective in the child simultaneously.

Another common parental blunder when fostering creativity in children is doing routine activities. This means that your child plays with the same toys and does the same things repeatedly. You should challenge the boundaries of your child by immersing him in different environments. This allows him or her to absorb different perspectives, different ideas, and different learning experiences. So if you find yourself taking your child to the beach for the third time this month, discuss a potential activity that your child would like to do. Including children in planning processes engages them in discussion, which provides them with more space to be creative.

Fostering creativity in a child is definitely possible, regardless of the child's intelligence. There are no bad children; but only bad parents. So don't make the same parental mistakes that everyone else makes, and start developing your child's creativity!

https://ezinearticles.com/?Are-You-Restricting-Your-Childs-Creativity?&id=8666177

Mindset Vs Skill - How to Succeed in Business (By Kathleen C Olivieri)

An online mentor of mine, Jennifer Allwood, shares that "business is 20% strategy and 80% mindset". While the "strategy" of a business is very important, to be successful you must have the right mindset about yourself, your company and your customers.

If you are a small business owner and you are looking for the "secret strategy" to change your business, you could spend all of your time in search of strategy. For example, scroll through Facebook and you will see the 100's of trainers, coaches and experts who are trying to sell you the latest "gadget" for success.

Stop enrolling in every Free Group and Free Download that you see. You are WASTING your time by chasing a shiny new object that is just not out there.

Learn the skills you need, know your audience, and stay plugged in to your industry. After that? It's all about Mindset.

How do you know if you have a mindset problem?

You keep searching for the "right" skill, the "right" training or that "right" coach that will give you the Magic Pill or Secret Sauce for success. Here are a few examples that might indicate you have a mindset problem:

• Complain about the success of others
• Enroll in every course/training you see on social media
• Continue to ask for the Right Words to describe your product or what you do
• Buy every planner in search of a better system
• Always busy but not completing Income Producing Activities
• Not consistent in small, daily activities

If you are searching constantly for skills, then you don't believe in yourself or your business. To succeed, you need the mindset component along with the skills.

Subconscious Mind

Your Subconscious Mind runs the show based on unfiltered information known as beliefs. Your Mind believes everything that you think. For example, when you say these things, your mind believes it:

• Why am I so stupid?
• I will never get that promotion.
• I'm not very pretty.
• I'm not smart enough.
• I'll never be successful like "Suzy".

Each and every time you say these phrases out loud and in your mind, your brain believes the statement! Next, you must learn how to change your mindset.

How to Change Your Mindset?

If we know that changing our mindset is key, then why are we not doing it? And most importantly how do we change our mindset? It's not easy, but keep it simple and you can Change Your Mindset!

There are several recommendations that I can make for changing your mindset.

• Personal Development?-?I highly recommend Mel Robbins and her resources.
• Daily Affirmations! Write them on your bathroom mirror or maybe a Pinterest board.
• Eliminate Distractions and get new friends
• Don't allow yourself to say negative things about yourself
• Make it an everyday habit

To get the life you want, you must let go of old limiting beliefs. Tackle the mindset beliefs that are keeping you from moving forward, keeping you from reaching your greatness!

If you have a small business, please know that you must have the skills for your business. But, you must also have the right mindset for success. You need skills and mindset!

How do you continually feed your mindset?

https://ezinearticles.com/?Mindset-Vs-Skill---How-to-Succeed-in-Business&id=10086868

Move In the Moment

You CAN trust God! He will never lead you in the wrong direction. When we are seeking and praying for God's guidance and for answers to life's circumstances, when the answer is presented we can't stand still. We must move with the flow of divine guidance and divine opportunities.

God has a perfect plan for our lives. And His plan might not always look like we think it should, but He knows how to get us from where we are at to where we desire to be. It is important that we pay attention to any divine signs. For example, if you are praying for your finances to increase are you missing signs? Are you receiving divine downloads that include ideas, concepts, and strategies? Sometimes we miss it because answers don't come how we expect them to. Maybe you were expecting a check in the mail or for someone to give you some money.

It is essential for us to be open to any new opportunities and to "think outside the box." This may mean going back to school, learning a new skill, stepping outside of our comfort zone, and many other things. When we move in the moment we don't worry about how things will work out, we trust that they will work out. That doesn't mean there won't be any bumps in the road, but we believe that the outcome will be amazing because we are moving in faith.

Don't be afraid to take a leap of faith because you are not leaping alone. That in itself should give you confidence. But even when God presents you with opportunities so that you can prosper, He is not going to make you move in their direction. You must take action and powerfully "seize the moment." You must believe in yourself and your ability to fulfill God's divine plan for your life.

Who wants to look back in five years and be regretful because of a decision they didn't make today? None of us do. Living with regret happens way too often, but it doesn't have to happen to you. You may be thinking "what if I take a leap of faith and I fail?" Well, don't think that way. Think like this, what if you take a leap of faith and you succeed? Just imagine how your life could be transformed.

I don't believe that taking a leap of faith because we are being obedient will ever make us feel regretful. From my experience even if the leap was scary I felt amazing because it also felt right at the same time. I challenge you to move in the moment and go for what you want once and for all. Crush every doubtful thought and unleash the faith that can propel you forward into a greater dimension of happiness, purpose, and prosperity.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Move-In-the-Moment&id=10025771

Wisdom Is Synthesized Positivism and Skills Summed Up

Wisdom is a term not understood in all the seriousness and comprehensiveness it involves and deserves. Rather in a loose manner, many a time and by many an individual, wisdom is treated as something equivalent to smartness. Being smart is only a small part of wisdom. Wisdom encompasses every aspect of our whole life. It reflects and manifests through every pore of the entire life we live from the time we cross childhood. Our eating, our dating, our affluence, our idiocy - practically every filament of our being has something to do with the wisdom we acquire and cultivate.

Wisdom is the sum total of one's intelligence, knowledge, experience, logic, and sense of proportion. This list of ingredients is not final! Surely, there is the spice of what is known as lateral thinking that adds to the recipe called wisdom.

Knowledge is basically information we gather through education, observation and experience. Intelligence is the fruit of knowledge. Intelligence makes us discrete, selective and cautious. Through intelligence, we arrive at solutions to complications we confront in personal and professional spheres.

Experience is the byproduct of a transaction we handle. Deft management of matters is skill. Skilful control of life's transactions with experience as the background is maturity. If a tube light in our bedroom is not glowing, checking up what is wrong - whether the fault lies with the starter or the tube or the supply switch - is knowledge. Setting right is skill before applying the commonsense of reassuring supply. And doing the whole job using proper gloves and tester is maturity!

Knowledge need not end after the education curriculum is completed. What remains after completion of study is education. Acquiring knowledge traverses essentially through the labyrinthine channels of:

i) Agreeing with what is taught

ii) Being neutral

iii) Opposing what is being imparted &

iv) Getting changed with what is taught and learnt.

Seeing beyond the opaque and visible can be termed as logic. Logical thinking and behavior lead us to safe and comfortable destinations in life. Logic functions as a speed breaker in our tumultuous and speedy journey of life. 'How can it be like this?' is the fundamental query in bringing in logic into life.

The other important component of wisdom is lateral thinking. Lateral thinking is extending thought and planning with a bit of unconventionality. At times lateral thinking could appear as being over smart.

Nevertheless, a pinch of lateral thinking certainly adds to the flavor of life. Trying it in recommended doses need not be shunned.

To sum up, wisdom is the total of lateral thinking, logic, presence of mind, experience, intelligence and knowledge. The sequence of these components could be however shuffled depending upon the situation

http://ezinearticles.com/?Wisdom-Is-Synthesized-Positivism-and-Skills-Summed-Up&id=8624512

Discovering Our Purpose, Treasuring Our Time (By Tammi Brannan)

I've wondered my whole life whether or not there is such a thing as purpose to our lives. Are we here to work and die, or is there more to it?

This was a question I heard the other day from a woman in her 60s, who has no financial need to continue working, yet feels this unresolved issue of purpose. Why is she here, and has she fulfilled that need?

We all have a purpose, and until it's discovered, life has a wandering feeling that grows over time.

Many years ago in a Chinese restaurant, I opened this fortune, "The day you were born, a problem was solved." Is it possible that the reason why this woman feels there is something leftover for her to do, is because she has yet to solve this "problem" that the Chinese proverb referred to?

I believe so. I encouraged her to discover and pursue her purpose. "But how?" she clamored. And I understand. It's confusing to determine our skills, let alone something as potentially impactful to others as purpose and "a problem solved."

Discovering a sense of purpose is an essential part of prosperity,and it relates to what is perhaps our most valuable asset of all:Time.

Time is so precious it cannot be bought and it can never be replaced. How are you spending yours? Are you happy with what you do for a living - or how you otherwise occupy your time?

If you sense dissatisfaction with how you are spending your time, you may have yet to define your purpose. It is also possible that you have some sense of what it is, but you're just not sure how to apply it to your current situation or career.

Purpose can be found by discovering 3 things within each of us: priority, skill and passion. Once discovered, we can craft a purpose statement by which we can make our future decisions, ensuring we solve that problem we are meant to solve. The purpose statement is essential, as it acts as a rudder to our ship, keeping us on course.

Without identifying our purpose, or crafting a statement to stay on track, the end result is similar to this quote by Thoreau: "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them." The woman who asked the question about purpose was feeling the bubbling of a song within her and felt the fear of it going unheard.

Jerry Seinfeld, who enjoyed more than 9 years as an actor on the successful sitcom, "Seinfeld," recently began a web-based show, called "Comedians In Cars Getting Coffee." Following its formation in 2012, he was interviewed on the ESPN radio show, "Mike & Mike."

I too can speak to the effectiveness of this research. In 2006, after 15 years in my chosen field, I felt the pull of what else I could do. After 6 months of research, I discovered and developed a process to not only pursue my purpose, but to also help my clients pursue theirs.

I have made my life center around this task, and that gnawing question hasn't bothered me since.

I encourage you, too, to take up the task of researching your greatest skills, thereby determining your purpose and solving that problem only you can solve.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Discovering-Our-Purpose,-Treasuring-Our-Time&id=8948969

7 Simple Tips To Understanding Any Type of New Skill

It could be argued that life is all about discovering new abilities. If you find out the right skills, you can be wealthy, play a musical instrument, have an excellent relationship, or juggle five balls. Mastering a brand-new ability is a skill in itself. There are numerous concepts to keep in mind as you discover a brand-new skill. Setting objectives, getting expert training, and having sensible expectations are very important.

Master a brand-new ability quickly and efficiently with these strategies:

1. Choose a necessary skill. You do not have time to learn everything, so pick something significant. It can either be a skill that will significantly assist you in some method or an ability that you find fascinating. If the brand-new skill does not suit among these 2 categories, you're unlikely to remain motivated adequate to master it.

2. Set both long-lasting and short-term objectives. Your long-term objective is mastering your picked ability. Simply how great do you wish to be? The short-term goal is no more than 12 weeks in the future. At the end of this short time, you set an objective for how far you want to be after the next few months. This will keep you focused on making constant progress.

3. Have affordable expectations for your progress. Your ultimate progress is virtually unrestricted. However, there is a limit to just how much you can achieve in 12 weeks. Recognize that you're special and your rate of development could be quicker or slower than average.

4. Breakdown the ability into its components. For example, playing the piano isn't just about hitting the right type in the proper order. It has a number of skills linked into a bigger ability. To be an excellent pianist, you need to have the ability to do numerous things well:

Sight-reading

Making up for the fact that some fingers are much more powerful than others.

Understanding musical theory.

Scales

Arpeggios

Dynamics

And more.

5. If necessary, get a coach. You can learn how to play piano by yourself, however you'll have a tough time finding a high-level pianist that didn't receive specialist direction. At the minimum, find products produced by a specialist. These might be in the type of books, videos, webinars, or sites. Even routine meetings with a coach can keep you on the right track.

6. Concentrate on exactly what's crucial. The old adage that 20% of your efforts will account for 80% of your outcomes is true. Determine which activities and skills will yield the best results. Most individuals focus on the activities that are the easiest or the most fascinating. Prevent being that person. Your development will be faster if you focus on the most important tasks.

This is frequently described as intentional practice. Banging on the piano keys while you catch the end of Rocky V isn't the like focusing all of your attention on finding out the best ways to play a C with both hands.

7. Get going rapidly. Avoid falling into the trap of collecting an excessive quantity of info before you begin. The individual that masters an ability is the one that spend his time sensibly. Watching videos of somebody playing the piano isn't a replacement for doing it yourself. Dive into the useful part of proficiency rapidly.

You'll be amazed by how rapidly you learn if you choose a proper ability, focus on the most reliable jobs, and practice consistently. Finding out a new skill can change your life. Choose an ability that will include value to your life and you'll gain from it forever.

http://ezinearticles.com/?7-Simple-Tips-To-Understanding-Any-Type-of-New-Skill&id=9441084

Where The Greatest Of All Results Comes From

Cassius Clay/Muhammad Ali said and meant that he was the greatest. Well, the results we make start with that thought even if we do temporarily fail at times, and ultimately succeed. Success is created really, not born. Luck and good fortune at first are usually born, but genuine success genuinely takes skill and temporary experiment, seeming failure, and much understanding from those two things called temporary experiment and seeming failure.

It always has to start somewhere, originates with us and we always have a chance if we genuinely look for it and seek it. Our genuine achievements are the natural order of things when we really want them.

The greatest thing in existence then is certainty of understanding and repeatable success. To genuinely quit and say "impossible" is genuine failure.

We cannot wait for the world and existence to change toward us, we must do what we need and want to do to get our results. Every dollar we will really ever earn, rich or poor comes from our efforts and our initiative. I did not say "given", but I did say and mean "earned".

One of the positive leadership secrets of Julius Caesar: He once came to an island he conquered with his army by boats. He took all of the equipment and flags off the boats, burned the boats and said something to the effect of "we win or we die and perish". The army of Julius Caesar won big against a bigger army, because they had more to fight for.

I suggest if you really want something, you or anyone should burn all bridges, ships or ways out to genuinely win ultimately. Let the reality of rational risk galvanize you. Win or die should be the mentality if you really want something anyhow. Without that "killer instinct", you are a loser even if you "win by luck" or "lose permanently without a fight". After all, a few hundred years after that island conquering Julius Caesar did, and in the twilight of the Roman Empire, and during the early rise of Christianity, martyrs like Saint Stephen and Saint Simon the Zealot when asked the question doing their own bridge, ship and escape burning so they would do nothing but the right thing to make them succeed with the causes they wanted and needed to put forth, said and meant something to the effect of "Render unto Caesar what belongs to Caesar, render unto Christ what belongs to the Christ."

The greatest of all results comes from that courage to take action and fully succeed without compromise.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Where-The-Greatest-Of-All-Results-Comes-From&id=9440547

From the Root to the Forest

Deeply rooted in you is a seed of genius. Every individual on this planet has a passion, skill, and ability that is ingrained in their hearts. The key is to build upon this seed. Consider a forest and how it grows. It starts out as a seed but when water and sunlight are constantly added to it, it starts to grow and bloom. How does that relate to you? When you take that seed of genius and you are consistently working it over and over again, you are exercising and building that greater person, increasing the "superstar-dreamer" within you.

This is an interesting concept to consider as it relates to you and what you do in your life. The forest didn't just get here out of nowhere. Not only that, but it didn't grow and expand in the capacity that it does. What starts as a seed grows in expanse to a forest.

Consider your skills, talents, career, or what have you, look at them and see if they've grown to forest-sized proportions. If not, could you really take a look and consider why it hasn't if it's not where you want it, or if you're not where you want to be. Some people are puzzled at why things aren't measured up to the magnitude that they want it to be.

Looking at our analogy from the story above, we see that there are two things that help in the growth of the forest. One is the water that is poured over the seed. Two, is the sunlight that helps in the growth of the seed. When the seed is properly watered and sunlit it is transformed from small seed to big forest.

What do you think would happen if you experienced a transformation in yourself, or your career? You could move from seed-like results to experience the size of a forest. If you watered your efforts, so to speak, little by little you could see growth in what you were doing.

There is forest potential in you. There is forest potential in what you do. A forest is a large thick GROWTH of trees. This would be amazing to see in your business and career. This would be great in different areas of your life. It would have a major impact on you.

In this year make the effort to move from just obtaining "root" results to making the impression of that of a forest. Allow the "forest" to spread over and have an effect on others and affect them for the greater good. Take it all the way from the root to the forest.

http://ezinearticles.com/?From-the-Root-to-the-Forest&id=9412779

In Pursuit Of Success

Any of you that follow me on Facebook or Instagram will know that I'm a big fan of inspirational quotes. Some people love them and some people hate them, but I am firmly in the love them camp. Sometimes we all need a bit of motivation and a few simple words can sometimes encourage you to think about your life or your present situation. I once read somewhere that success in life such is 10% skill and 90% mindset. I think there is a lot of truth in that. I personally know some incredibly successful people - self made millionaires and people that have built up a successful business empire from scratch. Not all of them work in the same industry, not all of them do the same things but they all share one thing in common - a positive, focused, motivated mindset. Even when they first started their journeys, they all believed in themselves and had visions of their future success. It's not arrogance, it's confidence and self belief. These people inspire and attract others who want to emulate their success.

Being self employed and starting your own business is hard. I know because I'm currently doing it. It involves early mornings and late nights, seven days a week. You have to make personal sacrifices so that you can invest time and money into your business. In the beginning, the financial rewards are small compared with the amount of work that you are putting in. It would be so easy just to give up but unfortunately, that is what the road on the way looks like. The difference between people that are successful and the ones who are not is that the successful ones don't give up. You have to remind yourself why you are doing it. Whether you want to earn lots of money for expensive things, financial freedom, to travel or whether like me, you want time freedom. The freedom to use your time the way you want, to take days off and holidays when you want, to spend your weekends with your loved ones, to spend Christmas at home with your family - that is why I am building my business. Remind yourself of your 'why' motivation every single day. If you have visions of living in a beautiful home, owning an expensive car, being your own boss, travelling the world... Don't call it a dream, think of it as a plan. If you want nice things and the freedom to do what you want, you can pin your hopes on a lottery win (it won't happen), or instead you can try and build your own success.

Some people have an incredibly negative mindset. We all have bad days. And it's OK. That's life. It throws challenges, hurt, obstacles, sadness, tragedy... Downright horrible things at us that we have to deal with. But some people just go through life under a permanently dark cloud, constantly pessimistic, moaning, feeling sorry for themselves and dwelling on everything that has gone wrong and waiting for the next thing that will go wrong. It's almost as if they set themselves up for failure after failure. I believe that positive people attract positive things and that your life situation will be as good as your attitude towards it. If you have the right mindset, you will attract people to you who will lift you up rather than bring you down.

I love the quote 'Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning how to dance in the rain'. It's been shared so many times on social media now that people ignore it but it's so true. A negative mind will never give you a positive life and you just have to learn how to deal with the rubbish life throws at you sometimes. In the past few years, I've had to deal with a lot of sadness, hurt and grief but I'm sure as hell not gonna let that defeat me. There are people no longer with me that I wish were, there are things people have done to me that I really wish they hadn't but I can't change any of them. All I can do is look forward, smile and keep living my life, doing the things that make me happy with people that make me happy. I don't think about what's wrong, I'm thankful for what's right. When something bad happens in your life, you have a choice. You can let it define you, let it destroy you or the one which I've chosen - let it strengthen you. If you can build a firm foundation with the bricks that have been thrown at you in life then you're onto a winner.

Think of a negative attitude like a flat tyre - you won't go anywhere until you change it :-)

These 25 Very powerful motivational quote will change attitude towards life. You can download them for free here 

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Something I Can't Resist

Is there something in your life that you can't resist? Others may say that they want all the things that money could buy. But for me, reading is something I cannot ignore. I find joy in simply reading pocketbooks, newspapers or any kind of book that capture my interest. No matter how busy I am, I really find time for reading.

There are some people who wonder why reading from time to time is important. Actually, reading is a vital skill to become a good communicator. If we have good communication skills, we can easily establish rapport with people we would like to talk to. Poor reading skills increases the amount of time it takes to absorb and react in the workplace.

Communication is very important in our day-to-day lives. Reading is one of the four macro-skills that we need to learn aside from writing, listening and speaking. Great learning tools include books, magazines and even the Internet. A person who loves to read can educate himself/herself in any area he/she is interested in.

Reading develops the creative side of people. Reading exposes us to a world of imagination. It shows us that nothing is impossible in this world. We are able to see things in a different viewpoint.

Reading develops our minds. It helps us comprehend things beyond its literary meaning. Reading with understanding not only develop our self-efficacy but also our self-confidence. When we know something, we are not afraid to share what we have. Our knowledge is our wealth.

When we have a high self-efficacy, we are confident to be motivated to achieve our goals. Efficacious people consider difficult tasks as challenges especially when we are knowledgeable enough to perform the tasks. Reading is a good tool to achieve this skill.

Reading stimulates our artistic mind. Reading also improves our positive self-concept. It adds confidence especially when we are able to meet and encounter different types of people. There's a saying that goes this way, "We cannot share what we don't have." It's true, but if we are equipped with the knowledge and skills, nothing is impossible for us.

Reading is also a sort of entertainment because when we feel lonely, we just read humorous stories to pacify us. By doing that we are able to relax our body and mind which is an important point because these days most people seem to forget how to relax.

That's why reading is something that I can't resist. It helps me become a better me. All of these self-improvements start from my passion in reading.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Something-I-Cant-Resist&id=9428464

Five Suggestions to Double Your Reading Speed

Many people would like to read more, but don't have the time. Then there are those who have the time, but don't like to read. Reading is a fundamental skill that everyone needs, and the better one is at this skill, the more enhanced life tends to be. Most people learn how to read in school, and after they leave school, their reading skills tend to stay about the same. Some are more ambitious, and look to take their reading skills to a different level. Here are five things that, if practiced, can help you double your reading speed.

1. Don't sound out each word. 

This is probably the most important thing to do to read faster, and it is the most difficult thing to overcome. When we first learned to read, we were taught to sound out each word. That also helped to spell the word correctly, as well as to pronounce the word properly. It takes much longer to pronounce each word than it does to look at the word, and just understand what it means. If you look at the word, and move right to the next one, the mind will remember what the word was, as it links the current word back to the first one. When you look at 2, 3, or more words at a time, this will get easier, which leads to our next suggestion.

2. Read 2 or 3 words at a time. 

Looking at each word and sounding it out is a long way to get through a sentence. After you have mastered looking at the word and not sounding it out, then try doing it with two words, then three words. When you are reading multiple words at a time, the brain is able to pick up the meaning more rapidly, and you can go to the next phrase, or group of words. It is quicker to read phrases than just reading each word. With practice, this will become second nature.

3. Have good eye span. 

Don't dwell on each word or phrase. Move your eyes at a good pace, but don't move so fast that you do not understand what you are looking at. When you look at the last word in the sentence, move your eyes rapidly to the next line, and look and move along the sentence.

4. Do not regress. 

One of the biggest obstacles to reading fast is regressing. It is natural to want to have a clear understanding of what is being read. As your reading speed increases, the tendency to regress will be less and less. You have to make a conscious effort to move along and not go back. As you move along, the word you may miss should not interfere with the meaning.

5.Vary the speed. 

Everything that is read does not have to be read at the same speed. Some things that are more technical will be read slower. The mind will pick up some things very quickly and others not as quickly. Move along at a pace that is comfortable. Move as fast as you can while still understanding what is being read.

With practice, the above steps will help you become a faster reader with better comprehension, and you will enjoy reading more books.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Five-Suggestions-to-Double-Your-Reading-Speed&id=9194498

HOW TO BE 'CONFIDENT' WHEN YOU DANCE

We're digging into the mail bag again today. A question that comes up often is how to find your confidence when you dance. Gaining confidence as a dancer takes time and patience.

For me confidence in flamenco dance comes from.. 

Mastery of technique.

When you learn any dance style you are in fact learning a language of movement. This language is learnt through the study of technique. Technique is the skill that will give you control over various movements, steps and positions. With this new language you have the tools to communicate your ideas and emotions to an audience. 

Practice of good technique will also enable you to understand how your body moves and what your strengths and weaknesses are so you can work to strengthen and improve.

How long should you practice technique for? Until you have no choice but to do a movement or step the right way.

Understanding of and connection to the music and song.

Flamenco dance is more about music and rhythm than anything else. Your confidence will come from a connection to the music and the cante. When you feel this connectedness you can dance the simplest of movements and the impact on the audience will be profound because they will be able to see you (by that I mean the you that is feeling and connecting). 

The only way is study flamenco music and listen to it everyday, make it a part of your daily practice.

Keeping it simple

If you have the opportunity to perform, keep your choreography simple. There is no need to do complicated steps if you can't actually dance them. No one watching you will be able to connect with you if all they can see is you thinking about the step you are trying to do and you will be freaking out (technical term) trying not to fall over. No chance for confidence to appear when you are trying not to fall over.

Choose movements or steps that you have mastered (see technique above) and gives you the space to feel and connect to the music.

Dancing without fear

This is the biggest way to build your confidence when you dance. You need to make a decision to dance without fear. This is the one piece of advice that I hear José give over and over again to all of his students.

When you dance with fear you stop yourself from finding your true potential as a dancer. You also make it impossible to connect to the music and any dance that you attempt will be full of the fear that you are feeling. 

If you can decide to dance without fear your confidence will grow through being able to truly embody the movement and music as well as sharing your internal experience with your audience.

You might make a mistake, but you know what? It doesn't matter. What matters more is that you have the courage to go out and give it everything you've got.

Flamenco demands courageous dancers.

Giving yourself time

As I said at the beginning of this post confidence is developed over time. Take every opportunity to practice being confident when you dance and eventually you won't have to worry about it so much. 

You can do it, you just need actually get out there and you know... do it. 

http://www.flamencobites.com/main/how-to-be-confident-when-you-danc
e

The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence

In some jobs, being in touch with emotions is essential. In others, it seems to be a detriment. And like any skill, being able to read people can be used for good or evil.

Some of the greatest moments in human history were fueled by emotional intelligence. When Martin Luther King, Jr. presented his dream, he chose language that would stir the hearts of his audience. “Instead of honoring this sacred obligation” to liberty, King thundered, “America has given the Negro people a bad check.” He promised that a land “sweltering with the heat of oppression” could be “transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice,” and envisioned a future in which “on the red hills of Georgia sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave-owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.”

Delivering this electrifying message required emotional intelligence — the ability to recognize, understand, and manage emotions. Dr. King demonstrated remarkable skill in managing his own emotions and in sparking emotions that moved his audience to action. As his speech writer Clarence Jones reflected, King delivered “a perfectly balanced outcry of reason and emotion, of anger and hope. His tone of pained indignation matched that note for note.”

Recognizing the power of emotions, another one of the most influential leaders of the 20th century spent years studying the emotional effects of his body language. Practicing his hand gestures and analyzing images of his movements allowed him to become “an absolutely spellbinding public speaker,” says the historian Roger Moorhouse — “it was something he worked very hard on.” His name was Adolf Hitler.

Since the 1995 publication of Daniel Goleman’s bestseller, emotional intelligence has been touted by leaders, policy makers, and educators as the solution to a wide range of social problems. If we can teach our children to manage emotions, the argument goes, we’ll have less bullying and more cooperation. If we can cultivate emotional intelligence among leaders and doctors, we’ll have more caring workplaces and more compassionate healthcare. As a result, emotional intelligence is now taught widely in secondary schools, business schools, and medical schools.

Emotional intelligence is important, but the unbridled enthusiasm has obscured a dark side. New evidence shows that when people hone their emotional skills, they become better at manipulating others. When you’re good at controlling your own emotions, you can disguise your true feelings. When you know what others are feeling, you can tug at their heartstrings and motivate them to act against their own best interests.

Social scientists have begun to document this dark side of emotional intelligence. In emerging research led by University of Cambridge professor Jochen Menges, when a leader gave an inspiring speech filled with emotion, the audience was less likely to scrutinize the message and remembered less of the content. Ironically, audience members were so moved by the speech that they claimed to recall more of it.

The authors call this the awestruck effect, but it might just as easily be described as the dumbstruck effect. One observer reflected that Hitler’s persuasive impact came from his ability to strategically express emotions — he would “tear open his heart” — and these emotions affected his followers to the point that they would “stop thinking critically and just emote.”

Leaders who master emotions can rob us of our capacities to reason. If their values are out of step with our own, the results can be devastating. New evidence suggests that when people have self-serving motives, emotional intelligence becomes a weapon for manipulating others. In a study led by the University of Toronto psychologist Stéphane Côté, university employees filled out a survey about their Machiavellian tendencies, and took a test measuring their knowledge about effective strategies for managing emotions. Then, Cote’s team assessed how often the employees deliberately undermined their colleagues. The employees who engaged in the most harmful behaviors were Machiavellians with high emotional intelligence. They used their emotional skills to demean and embarrass their peers for personal gain. In one computer company studied by Tel-Aviv University professor Gideon Kunda, a manager admitted to telling a colleague “how excited we all are with what he is doing,” but at the same time, “distancing my organization from the project,” so “when it blows up,” the company’s founder would blame the colleague.

Shining a light on this dark side of emotional intelligence is one mission of a research team led by University College London professor Martin Kilduff. According to these experts, emotional intelligence helps people disguise one set of emotions while expressing another for personal gain. Emotionally intelligent people “intentionally shape their emotions to fabricate favorable impressions of themselves,” Professor Kilduff’s team writes. “The strategic disguise of one’s own emotions and the manipulation of others’ emotions for strategic ends are behaviors evident not only on Shakespeare’s stage but also in the offices and corridors where power and influence are traded.”

Of course, people aren’t always using emotional intelligence for nefarious ends. More often than not, emotional skills are simply instrumental tools for goal accomplishment. In a study of emotions at the Body Shop, a research team led by Stanford professor Joanne Martin discovered that founder Anita Roddick leveraged emotions to inspire her employees to fundraise for charity. As Roddick explained, “Whenever we wanted to persuade our staff to support a particular project we always tried to break their hearts.” However, Roddick also encouraged employees to be strategic in the timing of their emotion expressions. In one case, after noticing that an employee often “breaks down in tears with frustration,” Roddick said it was acceptable to cry, but “I told her it has to be used. I said, ‘Here, cry at this point in the … meeting.” When viewing Roddick as an exemplar of an emotionally intelligent leader, it becomes clear that there’s a fine line between motivation and manipulation. Walking that tightrope is no easy task.

In settings where emotions aren’t running high, emotional intelligence may have hidden costs. Recently, psychologists Dana Joseph of the University of Central Florida and Daniel Newman of the University of Illinois comprehensively analyzed every study that has ever examined the link between emotional intelligence and job performance. Across hundreds of studies of thousands of employees in 191 different jobs, emotional intelligence wasn’t consistently linked with better performance. In jobs that required extensive attention to emotions, higher emotional intelligence translated into better performance. Salespeople, real-estate agents, call-center representatives, and counselors all excelled at their jobs when they knew how to read and regulate emotions — they were able to deal more effectively with stressful situations and provide service with a smile.

However, in jobs that involved fewer emotional demands, the results reversed. The more emotionally intelligent employees were, the lower their job performance. For mechanics, scientists, and accountants, emotional intelligence was a liability rather than an asset. Although more research is needed to unpack these results, one promising explanation is that these employees were paying attention to emotions when they should have been focusing on their tasks. If your job is to analyze data or repair cars, it can be quite distracting to read the facial expressions, vocal tones, and body languages of the people around you. In suggesting that emotional intelligence is critical in the workplace, perhaps we’ve put the cart before the horse.

Instead of assuming that emotional intelligence is always useful, we need to think more carefully about where and when it matters. In a recent study at a healthcare company, I asked employees to complete a test about managing and regulating emotions, and then asked managers to evaluate how much time employees spent helping their colleagues and customers. There was no relationship whatsoever between emotional intelligence and helping: Helping is driven by our motivations and values, not by our abilities to understand and manage emotions. However, emotional intelligence was consequential when examining a different behavior: challenging the status quo by speaking up with ideas and suggestions for improvement.

Emotionally intelligent employees spoke up more often and more effectively. When colleagues were treated unjustly, they felt the righteous indignation to speak up, but were able to keep their anger in check and reason with their colleagues. When they went out on a limb to advocate for gender equity, emotional intelligence helped them keep their fear at bay. When they brought ideas for innovation to senior leaders, their ability to express enthusiasm helped them avoid threatening leaders. On a much smaller scale, they were able to follow Martin Luther King Jr.’s lead in rocking the boat while keeping it steady.

More than two decades have passed since psychologists Peter Salovey at Yale and John Mayer at the University of New Hampshire introduced the concept of emotional intelligence in 1990. Why has it taken us so long to develop a more nuanced view? After Daniel Goleman popularized the idea in 1995, many researchers — perhaps awestruck themselves by enthusiasm for the concept of emotional intelligence — proceeded to conduct studies that were fatally flawed. As University of Lausanne professor John Antonakis observed, “practice and voodoo science is running way ahead of rigorous research.”

One of the most persistent problems was the use of self-report measures, which asked employees to rate their own emotional abilities on items like “I can tell how people are feeling even if they never tell me” and “I am generally very good at calming someone down when he or she is upset.” Abilities cannot be accurately measured with self-reports. As emotion experts Sigal Barsade of Wharton and Donald Gibson of Fairfield University lament, “One might compare this approach to assessing mathematical skills by asking respondents, ‘How good are you at solving algebraic equations?’ rather than asking the person to actually solve an algebraic equation.”

Thanks to more rigorous research methods, there is growing recognition that emotional intelligence — like any skill — can be used for good or evil. So if we’re going to teach emotional intelligence in schools and develop it at work, we need to consider the values that go along with it and where it’s actually useful. As Professor Kilduff and colleagues put it, it is high time that emotional intelligence is “pried away from its association with desirable moral qualities.”

https://medium.com/@AdamMGrant/the-dark-side-of-emotional-intelligence-fda18dd53da4

Use This 3-Letter Word to Give a More Compelling Answer to Any Question

The difference between getting what you want and being passed over is often simply a matter of how you tell your story.

This story first appeared on The Muse, a Web destination with exciting job opportunities and expert career advice. 

You know what you want: a new job, a promotion, an investment in your idea, or new networking contacts. And believe it or not, the difference between getting what you want and being passed over is often simply a matter of how you tell your story.

Too often, someone will tell stories from his or her personal point of view. Which makes sense--it's your story, so why wouldn't it be personal?

Well, the problem is you're forgetting the person that you want something from (be it a job, a raise, or a reference) will be thinking only of his story--how will what you're saying help him?

I see you shrugging your shoulders and saying, "I don't know how my raise will help him at all."

Well, good news for you. Selling someone on your story is a pretty simple shift that involves one three-letter word: why.

Far too often, people answer questions with what, when, and how. Here's how to start using why to get what you want.

When you're interviewing for a job.

The interviewer starts with "Tell me about yourself." So you say, "I've worked at Microsoft for the last two years." Or maybe, "I graduated from Yale in 2010 with a major in economics."

These answers may be true, but they don't answer what the hiring manager's really saying--give me a reason to hire you for this position.

So, instead of focusing on the what, focus on why you made the decisions you made between all the lines on your resume. Why did you choose a less obvious product to work on? Why did you want to move from journalism to PR? The better answer would look like this:

I went to Microsoft because I was interested in working on a large-scale software project, and Windows was one of the largest software teams in the world at the time. Now, I'm looking to join a small startup company, because I'd like to work on many different projects and grow my skill set.

This answer doesn't just tell the hiring manager who you are; it also explains why you should get the job. Suddenly, you're a much more interesting candidate.

When you want to change fields.

The first question most interviewers will ask in this situation is what interested you about Position A when your whole career's been focused on Position B. And most people make the mistake of answering this with the standard what refrain ("I want to make a change"). The why answer much explains your reasoning in a much more convincing way:

As much as I've learned working in PR, part of me has always wanted to make a difference through politics. I spend all of my free time thinking (and reading, and tweeting) about the upcoming election, and that's why I want to work on a presidential campaign.

I know I'd be much more excited about hiring someone who could articulate why she wanted to make the change than someone who was looking into a new field apparently just for the heck of it.

When you want a promotion or raise.

Yes, you should come to your evaluation with a brag list. But avoid the temptation to sit in front of your manager and rattle off all of the things you've accomplished over the past quarter. (You--and your boss--know what that sounds like, so it probably won't sway her decision either way.)

Instead, talk about why a promotion makes sense, not just for you, but for the team. In other words, rather than just stating that you've stepped up and successfully led numerous team projects, discuss the ways a management role would allow you to be an even more effective team leader.

It looks like this:

As you've likely noticed, I've been working on several projects outside of my job description. I've really enjoyed it and I want to do more. However, I think my colleagues in other departments might take my input more seriously if my title reflected my changing role. Is that something we can discuss?

Your boss will be more receptive to this framing than he would to a list of achievements.

When you want support for a bold, new idea.

Let's say you're brainstorming with your team about fixing a stalled project, and you decide to reach out to a broader base of constituents. You could just blurt that out, but if you lead with the what, then you'll have to convince them. If you start with the why, you can lead them to the answer by making it seem obvious. For example:

I noticed that only a small portion of our target demo has actually engaged with our product so far, which would explain why we haven't gotten enough data to make clear decisions about how to move forward. Let's consider strategies for reaching out to new users.

By presenting your argument this way, your plan seems not like an idea out of left field, but like something that only makes sense.

When you want to connect with someone new.

Imagine your major life events occurring along a winding path up a mountain road. Don't make the mistake of talking about the straight parts of the path, which is what you did during any particular stretch of time. Instead, talk about the switchbacks, the turns, and twists--because that's a whole lot more interesting.

The story about why you went back to school, why you moved across the country, or why you worked on that specific project, or within a certain industry is lot more fascinating that the standard "Here is my degree and job title.

For example:

I'm originally from the Midwest and never thought I'd be living in New York City. But I saw an opening at my dream company and thought I'll just put my application out there and see what happens. Well, by the time I made it to the final rounds of the interview process, I was hooked, and now I can even navigate the subway system like a local.

Expert tip: Here's even better advice for striking up conversation with someone new: Ask him or her the winding road why questions. Nine times out of 10, "Why did you make the switch from nonprofit to for-profit?" will lead to a more interesting (and more memorable!) conversation than "What do you do at your current job?"

Remember that while what, when, where, and how is important, why is interesting. And in career scenarios when you want to make a lasting impression, telling your story with why will do the trick.

http://www.inc.com/the-muse/use-this-word-to-sound-more-compelling.html