Do You Think You Deserve To Have It Better Than You Do? (By Kate Strong)

Entitlement

About 6 years ago a psychologist said to me that I may have an entitlement schema. I didn't know what she was talking about because I had had a hard life, and I couldn't see where I was thinking I was entitled.

A few months ago I was reading a book by Caroline Myss and she wrote something that resonated with the core of me. She wrote " Believing you deserve something means that you think you are entitled. I am entitled to heal; I am entitled to guidance; I am entitled to an easy life. Entitlement is a self-inflicted form of suffering... never approach God with an expectation, either. You do not deserve to be healed because you prayed, you do not deserve to have your prayers answered because you are a good person. To believe in entitlement and divine obligation is to ask for self-inflicted suffering."

Say what?

That really rattled me. Why else was I praying or believing that I could heal. That I deserved to heal. That God was a loving God?

Wasn't it natural that we pray for what we want?

I did want an easy life. Who doesn't?

I've been through a lot. I'd had enough and I just wanted a bit of peace, was that too much to ask?

Easy Life

Then after my friend died I felt really sorry for myself. Yet another blow.

I don't believe that I have to be a good person in order to have good things happen to me, like a martyr. I don't approach healing or the Divine like a child having eaten all my vegetables and can I now have a treat. If I just be good enough or suffer enough.

But I have wanted an easy life.

Victim Mentality

I also really did start to see how this sense of entitlement was causing me to think like a victim. I hadn't seen myself as a victim, because I had spent my life doing things to overcome the things that I've been through in my life. But, I was full of self-pity. Not grief. But pity as a dampener of my spirit.

What Fitness Is Teaching Me

My goal at the moment is to get fit. I want to lower my blood pressure and come off meds. I've done a lot of healing on this issue and still low blood pressure eludes me.

And then I got it.

I got how feeling I wanted to have an easy life, was the issue. How I felt like I should have had it different than it was, was keeping me stuck. That my friend shouldn't have died, that I should have had more love as a child, or kinder supportive husbands.

Only if...

I'm not entitled to jack shit. I don't mean that in a low self esteem way. But who says I shouldn't be busting my arse getting fit. Who says I shouldn't be taking blood pressure medication. And that I deserve to heal.

Narcissism

Its part of western society thinking too, if we move up the ranks from working class to royalty we get it easier. If we make it in Hollywood and have more money we've made it. We have more entitlement and therefore more freedom.

That's the illusion.

Humility

I'm not entitled to happiness. Handed to me on a silver platter. I have to make my happiness. I have to walk those miles to get fit. I have to love myself now. Maybe I was never meant to have the love I wanted as a child, for whatever Divine reason.

Maybe the injustice I've felt, and wanting it to be different, is what's created more of the same. I never liked comparing myself to others and being grateful for what I had, because others had it worse. It felt shaming to me.

But, I am starting to feel the power now that I had thought I would feel if I had been given what I wanted to be given to start with.

Maybe its making lemons into lemonade, but its not whinging that I didn't get lemonade to begin with.

Positive Motivation

I have more of a sense of determination now than I did before. I have wanted to find positive motivation instead of being motivated by fear.

I've set myself a goal to walk a certain track on the hillside here in Christchurch, I decided if it takes me a year to do it, then so be it. That I will do what it takes to accomplish my goal, and not give up because it should be easier than it is. Or that I should have less fear and ideally be off medication.

Before Enlightenment Chop Wood, After Enlightenment Chop Wood

I think praying to God and asking for what we want, or expecting any kind of healing, is still an OK expectation, but doing so without the sense of entitlement has more of an approach of sincerity and purity about it. It also means you're not asking passively and powerlessly, but more actively and gratefully.

My prayer would now sound something like "Please help me to put one foot in front of the other." Whatever the conditions. As opposed to wanting better shoes, or it to be warmer or easier.

Do you give up putting in the effort because you think it's easier for others, or it should be easier for you?

http://ezinearticles.com/?Do-You-Think-You-Deserve-To-Have-It-Better-Than-You-Do?&id=9615441

5 Ways To Overcome Excuses & Become An Early Morning Exerciser

Do you find it hard to carve out time for exercise each day? Or worse, do you find the exercise you do seemingly ineffective? A shift in your workout timing may be just what you need to help you get fit. People who exercise in the morning are more likely to make it a habit out of it, bringing truly longterm health effects. Not to mention, we have far fewer excuses and scheduling conflicts when we first open our eyes to the day.

We also see an increase in metabolism with early morning exercise, especially when it is done on an empty stomach. When we exercise in a fasting state (or after six-plus hours after eating), our body sees improved insulin resistance. That means our bodies can better process carbohydrates, proteins and fats, using the calories we eat more effectively. There's also an increase in human growth hormone, which directly increases the body's ability to burn fat and build muscle.

So whether you want to silence your post-work excuses or you want to get the most out of your hard work, these five tips will help you wake up ready to seize the day!

1. Be prepared.

The most common excuse to not exercise in the morning is lack of time. But by planning ahead the night before, you'll create space for more free time each morning. The night before a workout, prep for your next full day ahead: make a smoothie that's ready to grab and go for breakfast, pack your lunch and even pull out an outfit. Then, to prepare for your workout, fill your water bottle (or set your coffee machine), and lay out your workout clothes and shoes. Some people even find that sleeping in their workout gear helps them to fight excuses in the morning.

2. Sign up for a class.

Make getting out of bed and walking out the door the hardest part of your workout. By signing up for a class, you put the planning into someone else's hands and all you have to do is show up. Even if you're not fully awake for the morning's class, you're taking the powerful step of creating a habit. The more often you get out that door to your class, the harder you'll push yourself when you're there.

3. Be decisive.

Don't let your 6 AM brain be in charge of your schedule. She's grumpy, lazy and unlikely to support you in active choices. Make a commitment to yourself the night before and, even better, make a commitment to someone else. Pre-register for a class, schedule a walking date with a friend or tell your significant other your intentions. By saying it out loud,or putting money on it, you'll have extra motivation to light that fire under your sleepy butt come daybreak.

4. Create a behavior chain.

When building any new habit, it's helpful to link it to a part of your regular daily routine. That way, each day when you do that regular routine, it'll become a subconscious trigger to also do your new habit. For example, adding some sort of movement into your day each morning after waking up will create a placeholder that'll trigger your mind to think about exercising after waking each morning.

5. Embrace your negativity, then let it go.

To rid yourself of the "screw-it" mentality, you must first get to know it well. Examine the thought process you have around exercise and identify the moment that you usually opt out. Now you have powerful information to work with! It's those opt-out moments that must be removed to create better habits. For example, if you're someone who's always too tired to motivate after work, then starting an early routine will remove your "screw-it" moment. If you're someone who is stressed for time in the morning, then following the planning steps above will take away the morning "screw-it" response.

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-17610/5-ways-to-overcome-excuses-become-an-early-morning-exerciser.html