How Lying to Yourself Can Be a Good Thing

What we say to ourselves in our minds is so important. It can literally make or break us. And since what we think drives our actions, it's imperative we change our thinking to match the action that we want, so we can get what we want out of life.

Have you ever heard the saying, "A lie becomes truth if you hear it enough?" Cognitive psychology research has found that a repeated lie becomes truth over time. Things you say to yourself, or things others say to you about you, can quickly go from a lie to truth.

I'll say it again: What we say in our minds about ourselves can make or break us.

So how do we use lying to our advantage?

Most positive thinkers and motivational speakers agree that we need to find out what negative things we say to ourselves and stop it. So start by listing out all the bag things you say about yourself, EVEN IF YOU THINK THEY ARE TRUE.

You can tell its negative if it makes you feel bad, unsuccessful, or like you just don't care. So list them out - all of them. The ones you say to yourself, the ones you've heard people say to you or about you, or even what you think others may say about you. Make the list ongoing; anytime you think of something, write it down. Once you've made your list, or feel like you've got a good amount, take each negative thought and write a counter-thought that is positive, EVEN IF YOU THINK IT'S A LIE.

For example; here's a partial part of the list I made before I became successful:

Negative Thoughts/Positive Thoughts:

"I'll never make enough money"/"I am making A LOT of money right now!"

"I'm just too lazy"/"I am productive and my time is valuable!"

"I can't be rich"/"I can be rich, and I will be rich soon!"

"I'm not worth it"/"I am strong and powerful and deserve everything I want!"

"Making a lot of money online is a lie and a scam"/"I can make a lot of money online, without leaving the comfort of my house!"

"Other people don't care so why should I?"/"I love myself and I'm an awesome person! I don't care what others think of me."

I still catch myself saying similar things to myself. But I've trained my brain to look out for it and you can too. Once I recognize them, I immediately deprogram them from my thoughts.

Each day, or every time a negative thought crosses your mind, take out your list and repeat only the positive statements to yourself. In your mind, out loud, in front of a mirror - as many times a day as you think of it, or 10 times a day, or 50 times a day! The goal is to get your mind to believe what you're saying.

You see, I believe that you are productive. I believe you are successful. It doesn't matter who you are or where you come from, you can do anything you put your mind to.

If I can do it, so can you!

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-Lying-to-Yourself-Can-Be-a-Good-Thing&id=8539334

Should I Give Up? 5 Wrong Reasons for Giving Up on Your Goals

Anyone who ever worked hard and tried to achieve a serious goal knows that the journey towards achievement is not always smooth. There are ups and downs and people who want to be successful ask themselves at some point if it is time to give up. One of the things that I hear a lot that self-help gurus say and motivational speakers say is that one should not give up. People say, "Do not give up on your dreams", don't give up, don't give up.

This advice is useful. But what does it really mean to not give up and how do we know when it is time to keep trying or give up. When you face difficult times in your life, emotions take hold of you, you might see no clear way to move forward. To have someone say to you don't give up at the time when you feel emotional pain and feel stuck might be comforting but it could also be as good as telling someone to not get angry when they are already fuming with anger. It helps for you to understand when to give up and when not to give up. Sometimes healing requires that we understand causes of the disease and not just the symptoms of it. By understanding when to give up and when not to give up you will handle the situation when things are not going well and position yourself better to move forward. Know when to give up and when not to give up. This article shares 5 wrong reasons for giving up.

1. Giving up because you are not seeing results

In all our endeavors we expect to see results. That is just human nature. We sometimes do favors for people expecting that they will do the same for us. When we spend money and buy something we expect it to work as it should. In many areas of our lives we expect immediate results. This sometimes causes us to want immediate results when we attempt to be successful. Success works differently. It might not be as straight forward as we wish it could be sometimes. Just like a farmer who works hard to plant seeds and nurture his seeds until harvest, sometimes we might not see immediate results when attempting to achieve a specific goal. We therefore need to be comfortable working without seeing immediate results knowing we will reap rewards much later when harvest time arrives. Giving up on your dreams because you do not see immediate results can sometimes set you back in terms of goal achievement.

2. Giving up because you failed too many times

As human beings we are naturally wired to learn from experience. Research shows that negative experiences tend to stick to us much more than positive experiences. Our emotions also get associated with the experiences we receive from the environment. From a young age we experiment and put our fingers to burning candles testing if fire burns us. Once we get burnt we never want to put our fingers on fire again because experience has taught us that fire burns. After this we begin to associate fire with pain. When we see fire we avoid it as much as we can. This way of learning from experience and using avoidance helps us survive better.

The same thing happens once we are grown ups and attempt to achieve our goals. Much as we want to avoid failure the truth is sometimes we fail and begin to fear taking chances. This makes it difficult for us to live to our true potential and achieve our goals. Past failures have potential to affect us psychologically and cause us to fail to act in order to avoid the pain associated with failure.

This can be one of the worst reasons for giving up on your goal because past failures do not often reflect future performance. Many people who are now successful have failed many times in the past including Sylvester Stallone.

3. Giving up because you don't believe in yourself

Self-belief affects performance on how you achieve your goals. Even in sport, an athlete that is self-confident always tends to perform better than the one that lacks self-confidence. The same thing happens with our attempts to achieve our goals. When we believe in our abilities we have more faith and courage to take the actions that we need to take to achieve our goals. When we lack self-belief we get despondent and give up at the first obstacle that we encounter. We give up not because we are not capable or we are failing but because we simply do not believe in ourselves and we do not believe we can achieve our goals. This is a wrong reason to give up on your goals because it is based on self-perception rather than reality. Reality remains that all of us are capable of achieving what we set our minds to if we put enough effort and time.

4. Giving up because you are lazy to do the hard work

Sometimes giving up isn't so much about whether we will succeed or not but we give up because we dread the hard work that we need to do before we can achieve our goals. Exercising provides a very good example of how we sometimes give up on doing what we know can really work. When you eat well and exercise you are guaranteed to see positive results however it takes hard work to exercise and to get disciplined with diet. So even though you might be sure of the results you will achieve when you eat well and exercise you might give up on this consciously or subconsciously just because doing this is hard work.

5. Giving up because other people tell you to give up

Sometimes people might not support you. Perhaps your spouse doesn't support you or others say you will fail. It is possible that your vision is only visible to you and nobody else. When you are telling other people about your dream they might give many reasons why it will not succeed.

Giving up on your goal or dream because other people tell you to can be the worst thing that you ever do because your vision might not seem practical to many people. Only you know how you feel and how strong your passion is. Few people believed human beings could fly until the Wright brothers invented an airplane. Most people would be cynical when you say you can travel across the world from Africa to US in less than 3 hours yet research is currently conducted to create the fastest air plane in the world. What other people think is impossible can be very possible to you. So do not give up on your dreams just because other people have given you hundred reasons why what you are trying to achieve will not work. There might be many other ways to achieve your goals that would not be apparent to you until you are crazy enough to try what others think is impossible.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Should-I-Give-Up?-5-Wrong-Reasons-for-Giving-Up-on-Your-Goals&id=9420046

Live a Life by Design

I see it all too often; do this job or do that job, become this become that because it will give you a good living. A good living? To me good means OK, average, expected, and mediocre. That doesn't sound too inspiring does it? So why do we continue to live mediocre lives? Is that what society in America has come to? Oh get a job that you can put up with and give you a comfortable living. That is not the American Dream, it sure as hell is not my dream, and I would be willing to bet it's not your dream either.

In life we all want to accomplish great and magnificent things. How do we achieve great things with a mediocre lifestyle? You can't. To achieve greatness you must be great at what you do and with who you are.

To live a life by design you must develop the right mindset, the right mental frameworks. You will have to retool your skill-set. Perhaps most of all you will have to take a long hard look at the world around, and ask yourself, "am I moving in the same direction as everyone else?" Chances are you're in the exact same line, on the exact same road as everyone around you. To live a life by design you must break free from the pack, take the exit on the road you're on, stop and turn around, whatever analogy you choose to use for "I can no longer do what everyone else is doing."

So how do you start building a life by design, and more importantly start living it? I know from experience it's hard, and takes time. But when put in perspective it takes a hell of a lot less time than working 20 plus years to create a living. To create a life by design it will take anywhere from 3 to 10 years, it all depends on how ambitious you are. I know your thinking that is still a good chunk of time, why can't it be done sooner. The answer is, you will have to deconstruct what you have been led to believe, and then build a whole new foundation, and framework to support your new design for life, and that takes time. You will also have to develop a new process for your approach to your end result, and be consistent in its follow through.

What worked for me, and this is my experience, yours will most likely be different, was I started listening to motivational speakers to get me in the right state of mind. I then started listening to audio books of successful people or people who have what I want. I then turned to personal development speakers, and books, from there I read inspirational, non-fiction, firsthand account stories where the main character overcame extreme adversity, and lived to tell about it. I have always believed that if another person can do something, I can too, so I would model these people. I would take the best characteristics from those I look up to and I would do my best to make them a part of me.

Now if you are not someone who learns from hearing something, then you will need to read a lot of books. Me I am an audio visual learner, it is hard for me to comprehend books, so I turn to audio. I do practice my reading comprehension, it is difficult but I know it is an extremely valuable skill to have. That statement leads me to this; never stop developing who you are, you can always better your best. Never be satisfied with where you are, because to be satisfied is to be complacent, and complacency means you have stopped growing. Never stop growing, never stop developing, and never stop believing in yourself and what you can accomplish. That is what it means to live a life by design!

Be bold, and be brave.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Live-a-Life-by-Design&id=9314348

Changing the World, One Child at a Time

In well-developed Anglo-Saxon countries across the world, the personal development movement is a multi-billion dollar industry. Including market segments from holistic approaches, motivational speakers, inspirational websites, personal coaching, and other forms of personal development, the net worth of this industry is estimated to be almost $11 billion.

Millions of adults spend their hard earned money and time to read books and participate in seminars to develop life skills to create more success, happiness and fulfillment in their lives. However, one may ask, "Why wait!?". Shouldn't we be learning the basic skills of communication, goal-setting and planning from a young age?

Natalie Ledwell, author of the bestselling book, "Never in Your Wildest Dreams", host of The Inspiration Show and Co-founder of Mind Movies, asked herself the same question. Therefore, she took matters into her own hands and created "P.D. for Kids".

"P.D. for Kids" is a personal development curriculum designed for children between the ages of 6 and 12. The lessons are designed to be taught in classrooms and facilitated by teachers. The goal is to enrich and expand as many students' minds into what's actually possible and to instill positive life habits at an early age.

Each lesson is comprised of an easy-to-grasp explanation about a specific core principle of Personal Development, along with very engaging exercises and assignments to help students absorb the content. As part of the classroom activities and/or homework, students are instructed to directly and gradually apply those principles on a daily basis either at school and at home with the participation of their families. Ultimately, they will be encouraged to turn everything they've learned into life-long and healthy habits.

In a very informative and dynamic way, the program curriculum instills the students with core inter - and intra-personal values, and all the life tools they need to thrive in their lives.

The curriculum cover topics such as the importance of gratitude and settings goals for one's life, the power of words and thoughts and how they can influence the outcome of our dreams, the meaning and how to use affirmations and visualization techniques to move them closer to their goals.

The program also introduces to students to a powerful visualization tool entitled "Dream Design Movies" and guides them step-by-step in creating their very own dream movie.

Moreover, students receive in-depth orientation on how to identify and overcome challenges as well as the importance of taking action in order to accomplish their goals.

Lastly, the concept of "Stillness" is explained and students learn how to make use of meditation techniques in order to gain more self-confidence, peace and make the right decisions in relation to their goals.

They are encouraged to create their personal success daily routine that contain all the steps learned during the program, make them habits in order to achieve each and every goal they set for themselves throughout their lives.

However, Natalia and her partner Glen took it a step further and asked themselves why these same life-skills aren't being taught to children who really need them in under-developed countries.

As Natalie explains:

Basically, I have always wanted to empower adults and kids all over the world with successful life skills that they could apply for the rest of their lives. When my partner Glen and I started Mind Movies, I knew I would be able to accomplish just that.

So, I couldn't be happier when a university in Colombia requested that I create a Personal Development curriculum for kids that had the potential to benefit and empower the lives of 10,000 well-deserving kids who reside in the most poverty-stricken areas of the country.

Therefore, they took their charter program to Colombia and donated the program to 10,000 underprivileged kids to improve their own lives and the lives of their families. Additionally, the pilot program is now being taught in schools in Dubai, Australia and the U.S. and soon to be in Canada, South Africa and Spain.

Natalie and Glen's vision is to create a buy-one give-one system so that for every program that is purchased by a school, they will donate a program to either a low income or underprivileged school somewhere around the world.

Children are our future and empowering children around the world is one-step towards creating a better future for all.

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/dr-michelle-k-nielsen/changing-the-world-one-ch_1_b_8905148.html

Success = Perspective

Being successful are words that I have toiled and struggled with for many years. The term 'being successful' is often misunderstood and can create anxiety and grief for many people because it is often linked with large amounts of money, fast cars, expensive holidays and cruise boats. It seems to me and is often preached by many motivational speakers working the circuit that success is only measured by the number of tangible items accumulated.

But should this be how one measures their own success?

I would argue that 'being successful' is more than just tangible items; being successful is an ever- changing process that occurs when a person makes a conscious and committed effort to improve or build on his/her own personal situation. Being successful should not just be measured on a person's accumulated wealth or the tangible items stored in the garage. Being successful begins when a person makes a conscious decision to direct energy and effort into a goal and then perseveres until that goal has been achieved. Success arises when a goal has been met which then allows for other goals to be set which can then be achieved. In simple terms: The process of being successful is ever changing as goals are achieved and new goals are set.

When I moved to Sydney 12 years ago I was committed to finding a job and saving enough money to rent my first house. I arrived in Sydney with only a backpack and lived in a Hostel for 6 months until I could save enough money to rent my first place. At that stage in my life, my primary focus and number one goal that drove my personal success was to move out of the Hostel into rental accommodation and find myself a job. It was not about accumulated wealth or the number of tangible items I owned or possessed. I pushed myself by applying for many jobs interviews and at the same time completing courses to build my knowledge and better myself. After 2 months I was able to secure a job which allowed me to save enough money to rent a unit. My initial focus was on finding a job and moving out of the Hostel. I was successful in achieving this so I was then able to set new goals which I could work towards which would allow me to once again achieve success. This constant process of setting small achievable goals and then succeeding in reaching those goals has allowed me to buy many houses, open and sell businesses and work in a job that I really love.

Being successful is relative to one's personal circumstances. Everybody has a different starting point and should measure their own success on their own personal circumstances. Being successful is more than tangible items or money in the bank. So the next time you feel down because you feel that you are not successful, take some time and think about your own personal achievements as these are true measures of being successful.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Success-=-Perspective&id=9157969

Your Life Is NOT As Bad As You Think It Is!

Perspective. What an interesting word. It is the Achilles' heel of every human being. Think about it for a moment. Everything we think and feel is due to our perspective. A rainy day may be seen as a ruined picnic to one person but a God-send to a drought-infested farmer. One man may think blondes are the bomb, and another may prefer brunettes. White water rafting is exhilarating to one person, but strikes terror in someone who can't swim. Politics, religion, finances, marriage do's and don'ts, fashion sense, furniture arrangement, holiday traditions-it is ALL a matter of perspective! I can hear you now, "But that's how I was raised." And with whose "perspective" were you raised?

If a child was told from the time he/she was little that an apple's color is blue, and there was no one there to refute it, don't you think that child would grow up believing apples are blue? Based on the input he/she was given, he/she may believe 2+2=7, nice girls don't speak their minds, Christmas stockings should be hung outside, all dogs are to be feared, our family is, and never will be, good at certain things such as sports/finances/marriage/confidence... and the list goes on, and on, and on.

So, what is not as bad as you think it is? All of it! None of it is real. It's all perspective. The most-persuasive motivational speakers in the world are selling you one thing-their perspective! Does it make it correct? No. It may ring a bell with you and you feel empowered when you hear it. That's great! Adopt the parts that work for you, that make you feel better, and change your life for the positive. But the point I want you to walk away with is this: No label, no stamp, no assumption, tradition or amount of people screaming at you who they think you should be, matters at all. This is YOUR life! You write the script! You delete the parts that aren't working for you, and you tell the others that they are welcome to take their own advice but you are going to pull your own strings. Toss all of it in the trash can that is not serving you. The past is shadows. They lose their strength when you shine a light on them and strip them of their false beliefs.

This is an excerpt from Rebecca F. Pittman's new book, Troubleshooting Men, What in the WORLD do they want?, available now on Amazon. Part 1 helps you create an amazing life through improved self-esteem and confidence. We also included what over 2,000 men say men are looking for in a woman, date or marriage. More articles on self-esteem are available at our free website, [http://www.troubleshootingmen.net]. Buy the book for yourself or a friend and see what all the fuss is about!

https://ezinearticles.com/?Your-Life-Is-NOT-As-Bad-As-You-Think-It-Is!&id=8793725