Showing posts with label responsible. Show all posts
Showing posts with label responsible. Show all posts

The Article Of Self-Responsibility, Not The Statue Or Statute

Freedom

We must be responsible for how we feel, respond and act in any situation. The choices we make are our choices. Listen, I sometimes would like to blame all of the good stuff on myself and all of the bad stuff on other people. But good or bad, life is ultimately a choice of "my fault" however it goes. This article is halfway "helpful physician help yourself" and halfway "what I would do with my own advice in an ideal situation". Indeed, though, this article is all reality, as you will be able to tell while you are reading it.

Sometimes, like anyone, I get frustrated with the bad happenings, and haughty about the good happenings. The only difference is, though, is that I am aware of my choices that caused or had a hand in causing both types of happenings. To be a winner is to embrace the good and the bad, and genuinely say and mean "my fault", take charge, and make the bad good and the good better without chalking things up to "it was nothing" or bad or good luck. Realistically, I can say with all honest meaning from and to myself: Ultimately, looking at things from an "I cause it" point of view however good or bad the situation is really is best. Indeed, looking at causes instead of "lucky", "unlucky", "fortunate", "unfortunate" type events brings a whole new and sometimes way better light to a situation. For acknowledging personal choice as being the causation in situations gives genuine personal power. Giving the cause to something outside yourself is the ultimate personal weakness. Take full initiative, and responsibility and all of that good stuff, and ultimately you will get where you want to go.

I know how the above sounds, and I did say and mean that this article would be unflinching and realistic. But, personal responsibility does lead to a superior, genuinely superior state of being. Good choices equal good results? You bet they do. Bad choices equal bad results? Oh, you can depend on luck to make a good outcome, but ultimately, when everything is done, the good choices are better even when you get a "luckily good result" and the way of the fool is to totally depend on luck or a turn of good fortune to make a bad choice good whatever the result may be even if it is "good". Be responsible, nothing can take the place of responsibility for yourself.


http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Article-Of-Self-Responsibility,-Not-The-Statue-Or-Statute&id=9754962

Come Out of Power Stress and Sacrifice Syndrome Trap


With increased responsibilities comes greater stress. When you assume a position of leadership, all your decisions have far reaching consequences and impact a large number of people. The feeling of being responsible for many people and choosing between options which aren't always black and white leads to the leaders falling into the trap of power stress. The higher you go in the hierarchy, the lonelier it gets since there are no thought partners to discuss your decisions or your next moves. Being held responsible for the events which are out of their control also adds to their stress levels.

Sacrifice syndrome follows power stress

Just when you think that power stress is the worst thing that can happen to a leader, you face with sacrifice syndrome, which almost immediately follows power stress. Sacrifice syndrome is the shortest way for an executive to reach a burnout. The constant stress and fatigue pile up sucks up all the positive energy from the executive and takes away his efficiency. As easy as it is to enter the sacrifice syndrome, it is tough to come out of it simply because most people around you tolerate it and even encourage it. You are expected to work longer hours, come on the weekends, take up tasks which you do not need to and much more.

As an executive coach, I often come across leaders who find themselves trapped inside the sacrifice syndrome. Before giving them my two cents, I make sure they understand that all my advice would come down to nothing if they do not work towards it. My first advice is to practice mindfulness in its truest form. You need to listen to your heart, body and mind. While you cannot expect to develop this habit overnight, once you master this, it would go a long way in putting your life back in order. The other thing you need to do is to believe that something good and positive is around the corner. It is what would give you the strength to move forward. You have worked your way up to this position with your sheer hard work and persistence. You have it in you to do justice to this post. It is you who has to start the change. Don't wait for things to happen; this is the time to be the leader you are.



http://ezinearticles.com/?Come-Out-of-Power-Stress-and-Sacrifice-Syndrome-Trap&id=9725739

It Is What It Is: A Definitive Understanding Of What To Expect From Life

What we give is what we get, the end. Oh, sure it is that simple: Indeed though, let me make an article out of that.

Ultimately, we are logically responsible for everything however illogical or unlucky it may seem at the time it does happen, and although we do not seem responsible for getting into the trouble, we are definitely responsible for inventing or creating a solution. What is life about? It is all about making things better and solving problems. From a better source of light (from candle to light bulb) to better transportation (from horse to airplane). Indeed the only "pedagogical infinity" that exists for any time is an unsolved problem until it is solved from a higher vantage point than the point that discovered or came into the problem.

Sure. we get what we perceive and expect, and we have two choices: We can let it conquer us and say "we are done" or we can work to conquer it, and say, "I will grow up and deal with this". Sure there are many choices in between those two, and beyond those two choices, but, those are the basic logical choices we have: Deal with it, or let it conquer us. Indeed, problems are never really unsolvable. I came up with this article thinking principally that I had nothing to write, but in my mind after I thought that, my thought processes were piecing together this approach to reality in which one side of it works, and one side of it does not work. Letting things conquer us without creating a genuine solution does not work while conquering things through creativity ultimately does work. Note though: I said ultimately, meaning that it takes work and steadfast growth for it to work. After all, outside of a laboratory where artificial means of growth are possible have you ever heard of an instant large natural oak tree? The reality is the reality and nothing else, and we do have to work with it ultimately.

Today, I had a small dilemma: How was I going to fulfill my obligations today without wasting too much time, and my answer was to simply deal with it minute by minute instead of actively saying impossible in any way. This answer helped me in the best way, it even ultimately helped me with this article. So, if you deal with it, it is possible, but sometimes it may take a little more creativity and time (in that order), but it is possible.


http://ezinearticles.com/?It-Is-What-It-Is:-A-Definitive-Understanding-Of-What-To-Expect-From-Life&id=9743919

Teach People How To Treat You Better!

According to Dr. Phil, "We teach people how to treat us." Let that sink in for a moment. Rephrase it and repeat it a couple times to yourself. "I teach people how to treat me." Maybe you're thinking, my life isn't perfect and maybe once in a while an argument gets heated, but I'm doing alright.

But think for a moment about how people really do treat you. How does your spouse or significant other talk to you or about you? Do you feel supported and like you are both on the same team? What about your dad? Your ex? Do you walk on eggshells or tip toe around certain issues to avoid an argument? Think about nicknames people use for you, is there one you don't really like but you just let it go?

Are there things that any of them say that are a little on the edge of being rude? How do you react when this happens? Do you stop it, leave the room as if you didn't hear it, or just keep quiet? They may call you "big mama" referring to your extra weight but they frame it as "an inside joke". Do you laugh with them? Or do you ask them not to use that reference for you again?

What about your children? How do they talk to you? How do they behave toward you? Do they yell at you, try to hit you, push, ignore you, or kick at you when they don't get their way? Do you chalk this up to "just a tantrum" or do you discipline them for it? Do they show appreciation or just demand or expect you to cook, clean, and drive them to/from activities?

Think about other people in your life such as co-workers, friends, and relatives. Maybe they joke about "you and your book smarts", refer to your "hillbilly" accent, comment that you "run or throw like a girl", or ask "when are you going to just get a real job?" How do you respond? Does it feel like your co-workers or your boss value your contributions? Have you been corrected or yelled at by a boss or co-worker in front of other employees or customers?

As you think about how each of these types of people treat you, try to identify any patterns between them. For example, do both your husband and your in-laws make fun of the type of job that you have? Is there a running joke with your in-laws and your friends about your house being featured on the next TV episode of Hoarders or How Clean is your House?

Or maybe you have a friend or several friends that seem to imply that being a stay at home mom is not important or the fact that you work full-time and have your kids in daycare is not right. Maybe it's a co-worker who rolls their eyes every time you get a phone call from your kids who are at home.

Does this mean you are to blame for people treating you badly? Absolutely not. You are only responsible for what you knew when you knew it. And each person is ultimately responsible for their own behavior. But the good news is that now that you do know, you absolutely can teach most people how to treat you better!

The way that you teach people how to respect you or in some cases teach people how to treat you better is by first creating a very clear picture for yourself about what kind of behavior or treatment you will accept, how you express this to others, and how you respond if the poor treatment continues.

In order to set clear limits about how others treat you, it's important for you to first commit to some firm guidelines about how YOU treat yourself and others. The better you get at taking care of yourself, the harder it will be for you to tolerate disrespect from others. You also have to treat others well. The old adage, "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" should be your new mantra.

We teach people how to treat us, yes. But that doesn't mean that everyone who behaves badly toward us is an evil person. They may not even be aware of how their treatment makes you feel. And you definitely contribute to that if you don't let them know how their behavior impacts you. They don't know what they don't know either. And if they do know they are hurting you, all the more reason for you to put a stop to it now.

So now that you know you can teach people to treat you better, the next step is to learn more about how to set firm boundaries and how to express yourself in an assertive way. With a little practice, you will be able to send a clear message to folks that you respect yourself and won't allow anyone to violate that in the way they treat you. There are several ways you can learn to set boundaries and stand up for yourself including self-help books, community education classes, or by getting the help of a life coach who specializes in this area. Contact us today!

http://ezinearticles.com/?Teach-People-How-To-Treat-You-Better!&id=9314504

How To Create Real Freedom In Your Life



In April of 2012, my father died unexpectedly at the age of 54. Upon hearing the news, I felt almost numb. He and my mother had divorced when I was young, and he was never around. As I grew up into the adult that I now am, my dad tried to rekindle the relationship, but I was bitter and angry.
Unsurprisingly, the days leading up to his funeral were difficult. My mind felt consumed by so many thoughts. The day of his funeral gave me a harsh reality check: that's when everything got real. I sat there looking at his body and realized suddenly, deeply, that he was gone. That was it. I would never get a chance to reconcile with him or hear his story because he was no longer alive. Three days after the funeral I completely broke down.
Over the next few weeks, I started to replay the last few conversations my dad and I had. The one thing he had always said over and over again was not to live life the way he did. He told me not to die with regret in my heart. How? He told me to create freedom in my life.
Since his death, I quit a job I hated, I lost 170 pounds, and my family moved to our dream designation of Maui, Hawaii. I finally understood my dad's advice, and I created freedom in my life. Life is too short. Time is the one thing we'll never get back.
Since we only get one chance to live life, here are four ways you can live it with freedom, real freedom.
1. Feel responsible for your body.
In other words, get control of your health. No one else can, or will, do this work for you. Whether it's losing weight, getting fit, or really understanding what it means to live a healthy lifestyle (and feeling the benefits!), you have to take ownership over your needs and desires when it comes to your body and your health.
Disease, sickness, and the way we feel can be directly traced back to what we eat. The amount of energy we have to do the things we need to do in life can be traced back to our fitness. Your health is one area of your life that you can actively cultivate. Try it ...
2. Find or create work you love.
Most of us spend 47 hours of the week working. When you spend that much of your time doing something, it will affect you one way or another. Sure, most of us in the world are constantly hearing and talking about the bad state of our economy. And sure, job opportunities aren't what they used to be.
But you can nevertheless create opportunities for yourself, or at least try. In the process of giving your interests, passions and professional relationships more thought, you will be learning. It all starts with productive thinking and questioning. If you want a better job, start figuring out what kind of work you're looking for. Put a plan in place to land that job. It might take a while, and the process might consist of small steps leading you toward growth. So be patient!
If you've been thinking about creating a business, the Internet has opened doors that were previously closed. With over 2.5 billion people online everyday, you can create a highly profitable business. You have many options to create freedom in your work.
3. Choose experience over stuff.
At the end of our lives we're not going to remember all the stuff we had, we'll remember our experiences. And you can't take that stuff with you.
It's OK to have nice things, but if they cost you an experience (or many), they're not worth it. If you have a chance to try a new food, or travel to a cool place, or meet someone amazing, take it. Those are the things you'll remember.
4. Don't settle.
Complacency is the enemy of your dream life and the concept of freedom. You are destined for greatness, not a "good enough" life. Society and other external pressures constantly try to tell us what "a good life" looks like. Not only should you want more, but you have the power to get more. By settling, you are denying to yourself that you have that power.
When doubt, fear and the voices of negative people try to hold you back, ignore them. Chase that dream and create free by not living life on autopilot. My father's death was the wake up call I needed. Learn from my mistake, and create freedom in every area of your life. Don't let fear win.