Life Is Too Short To Care About What Other People Say

We cannot please everyone. So, why do we care? Let's live life to the fullest and have fun. At lease we give them something to talk about.

Reality check: It's not possible to meet up to everyone's expectations. There will always be people who will judge us no matter what we say or do, or how we treat them. It's inherent to human nature. In fact, we often worry what others think about us but it won't help us move on with life. It will just upset us and hinder our vision to see things in a clearer perspective.

Sometimes, we tend to settle on the status quo. We have a tendency to flip life just because of the things we do to please others, not as a result of what we believe. Eventually our actions become wrought by how we expect others to understand us. We cannot stop people from judging us but we can do something to lessen its impact on us.

Think about the worst factor that might presumably happen once somebody is judging you of what you are doing. I guarantee that nothing can happen. We may react for that matter but nobody really cares.

Start standing up for what you think in-causes, opinions, anything. you are going to possess those that ail you anyways, therefore why not specific however you really feel? I've learned that it's better to be cherished by a couple of folks you care regarding, than to be liked by everybody. These are family, friends, who love you for who you are, and also the folks that are going to be there for you throughout your worst times.

Worrying an excessive amount of concerning what others suppose will become a self-fulfilling prophecy, as a result of the means we predict starts to become the means we tend to behave. These people become people-pleasers and excessively accommodating to others, thinking it'll stop them from being judged. In fact, the public don't love push-overs and are turned off by it. The behavior we tend to use in an endeavor to please others will truly cause the opposing result. This implies that if you are a push-over, then you are going to be attracting others in your life WHO are also push-overs.

We tend to begin thinking that this is often the norm and that we stay comfy which is often not an area you wish to be. First and foremost, you wish to understand what is vital to you in life, what you actually worth, and what you are ultimately aiming for. Once you recognize who you actually are and what matters to you, what others think about you becomes nothing.

Stop saying YES to everything. Instead, learn to say NO and straighten your values.

Surround yourself with those who are self-assured and live life without comprising their core values.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Life-Is-Too-Short-To-Care-About-What-Other-People-Say&id=9993866

Why You Should Stop Boasting About How Busy You Are

An Accomplished Life

"Hi Tom, how are you?"

"I'm well Jane, just extremely busy."

"Oh, I'm glad to hear you're keeping busy then."

"Yes, I'm flat out at the moment."

The above interaction is one that takes place between people on a daily basis.

But what is behind the busyness?

Is it a way to deflect attention from what really matters?

People brag about their busy lives to highlight themselves living an accomplished life to their peers.

Similarly, they may wish to communicate how meaningful their work is and so it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Being occupied implies oneself is consumed with matters of significance. That is why people state their busyness, to have you know they are important.

Busy people struggle to keep their attention in the present moment because their focus lies in future events and planning for the next project.

"We become active and busy, but this doesn't actually move us any closer to success. Activity is often unrelated to productivity, and busyness rarely takes care of business," states authors Gary Keller and Jay Papasan in, The One Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results.

I question those who have a hectic schedule as a method to divert their attention from connecting with their core self.

The title quote by the Greek philosopher Socrates, invites you to be wary of a busy life which can be barren.

The busy person is disconnected from others, simply because their attention is focussed on their own commitments. There is the impression of a purposeless life, masked behind the facade of a frantic lifestyle.

Busyness can be reframed to imply your pursuits are purposeful instead of busy.

Gary Keller and Jay Papasan affirm, "Don't focus on being busy; focus on being productive. Allow what matters most to drive your day."

Busy or Just Unproductive?

You can be busy but not productive and still chase your tail.

Beneath the busyness lies the unconscious desire to be rewarded for hard work.

People believe being preoccupied is impressive and associated with status. You must be pursuing something prestigious, otherwise you wouldn't be busy.

I'm reminded of an episode in the Seinfeld sitcom where the character George Costanza, played by Jason Alexander, walks around the office looking annoyed. He realises that being busy is associated with stress and works hard to uphold this facade.

He appears irritated, causing his supervisor; Mr. Wilhelm to fear George is cracking under the pressure of his work.

While this scenario is fictional, it shows how people unconsciously use busyness to draw attention to themselves.

Similarly, you may believe multitasking is indicative of productivity. Busyness implies being on top of things which is often the furthest thing from the truth.

"Productivity isn't about being a workhorse, keeping busy or burning the midnight oil... It's more about priorities, planning, and fiercely protecting your time," affirms associate editor at Psych Central, Margarita Tartakovsky.

The busy pandemic comes at a cost to people's well-being and happiness. You may find it difficult to disconnect from work to spend time with family. These are the pursuits that rejuvenate you instead of deplete you.

Busyness can be a sign of procrastination. It is a smoke screen to cover up being overwhelmed and in need of help to prioritise your life.

Consequently, those in the creative field will tell you they are absorbed in their interests and not busy with work.

It was the late Stephen R Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People who said, "It is possible to be busy-very busy-without being very effective."

The Demands of a Hectic Schedule

                                              

It is vital that you set clear boundaries if you wish to be fulfilled. Busy people find it difficult to say no since they do not wish to offend others or be seen as incapable.

I'm yet to meet a busy person satisfied with their hectic schedule. I'm certain they would trade their frantic life for: less work, more time and money.

Occasionally, you might be pulled by circumstances not of your choosing. Business may unexpectedly increase if you're self-employed as you try to meet the pressures of growing sales. But that doesn't mean you are happy if all you are doing is working to provide for the demands of other people.

You have a choice how you spend your time. To claim you are busy is failing to prioritise your time wisely.

"Everybody's busy. Everyone does the actions. But were they the right actions? Were those actions productive? Did you take a step forward? These are questions that most people never take the time to think about," reminds us author Jeff Olson in, The Slight Edge.

After all, what is the point of being busy and stressed to the point of exhaustion that your health and relationships suffer, just to improve your bottom line?

Surely, there's a more efficient way to work in the 21 century while enjoying more leisure time?

Busy people are prone to being overwhelmed if they continue to drive themselves hard. It is not healthy to run yourself into the ground and expect to stop at the drop of a hat.

Something must give. That may be as excessive drinking to help you wind down or toxic behaviours such as: compulsive eating, gambling or whatever distracts you from what is important.

We all have the same hours in the day and how you spend it is entirely up to you. Many people squander their time running around believing they are productive, when they are simply busy due to their lack of organisation and prioritisation.

"We are so busy being enticed by our next endeavour that we forget to savour what is already there and could be deeply meaningful. It is useful to remember the adage "The more things change, the more they remain the same" avows author Bernard Roth in, The Achievement Habit: Stop Wishing, Start Doing, and Take Command of Your Life.

A better way to reframe busyness is to state you are productive or engaged in what you are doing. Conversely, communicating you have taken on more than you can handle, is a step towards reclaiming your lost time.

This is not a cry for help, but exposing your vulnerability to those willing to help you better manage your time.

Find ways to be less busy and more engaged so you are in Flow, as the Hungarian psychology Professor, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi espouses.

Busyness is a not indicative of a rewarding life if all you are doing is jumping from one task to the next.

Those who manage their time successfully hold on to it like it was their last breath. They prioritise what is important and so should you.

I invite you to think with the end in mind as Stephen R. Covey conveys in his teachings.

Only then will you appreciate what really matters and worth devoting your time and energy towards.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Why-You-Should-Stop-Boasting-About-How-Busy-You-Are&id=9551140

What Are YOU Attracting in Your Life? Connecting New Age, Metaphysics and Quantum Physics

"God does not play dice with the Universe." ~ Albert Einstein

In an earlier article, I discussed how the philosophy of, 'we become what we attract' dates back thousands of years. That what you tell yourself becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy through the power of "I am" statements. And that most people are unaware that they continually attract exactly what they do not want through negative statements like "I think I'm getting sick," or "I'm too fat, too old, etc."

New Age thought often connects self-empowerment with Universal energies. Books like The Law of Attraction and The Secret are based on this philosophy of what you put out comes back to you. But to go beyond New Age thought we need to go into Metaphysics that can be explained through quantum physics.

Metaphysics is derived from the Greek word Meta meaning "beyond" or "after," and physics pertaining to the physical. Initially meaning beyond the physical, today it encompasses theories and explanations for phenomena not often explained by the physical sciences. Metaphysics can involve theories of the origins of the Universe, consciousness, the purpose of life, universal laws, and Karma. It can attempt to answer questions that the physical sciences cannot. Metaphysics attempts to explain phenomenon that traditional science does not attempt to explain. Concepts such as psychic phenomenon, telepathy, ESP, Out-of-Body Experiences, Near Death Experiences, Reincarnation and the spirit dimension science usually dismisses through "lack of evidence." However, quantum physics does in fact explain such Metaphysical phenomenon.

The field of quantum physics began in the early 1900's. It is a set of principles that describe the behavior of subatomic particles. Quantum theory provides accurate descriptions for many previously unexplained phenomena such as black body radiation and stable electron orbits. In the development of quantum theory, physicist Max Planck (1858-1947), considered the founder of quantum theory, proposed that energy waves could be described as consisting of small packets or quanta. Albert Einstein (1879-1955) further postulated that an electromagnetic wave such as light was composed of particles called photons. This led to a theory of unity between subatomic particles and electromagnetic waves called wave-particle duality in which particles and waves were neither one nor the other, but had properties of both. Quantum mechanics led to the development of the transistor, electron microscope, magnetic resonance imaging, the laser and semiconductors.

An interesting discovery of quantum physics is that of nonlocality, the phenomenon that when two particles interact, they continue to influence each other and transfer information between them instantly, no matter how distantly separated they become. They can be separated by inches, feet, or millions of miles, and the transfer of information is immediate, indicating instant communication. This transfer of information is not bound by the laws of the physical universe, such as traveling at the speed of light (186,282.4 miles per second). It is believed this nonlocal transfer of information operates in an unseen reality, one that connects all physical events with the universe.

Using theories in quantum physics, we can explain how Metaphysical principles such as energy healing, clairvoyance, and consciousness existing outside the body all function:

Light is composed of electromagnetic energy that has properties of both particles and waves.

These subatomic particles can transfer information as well and are not bound by properties of space or time.

Human thought/consciousness produces energy similar to that of light-energy with the same properties; consciousness is not bound by space and time.

Consciousness/thought is composed of energy that can affect matter near or far.

Science is now explaining how energy can leave the body and affect its surroundings, be it near or far (energy particles are nonlocal). Quantum physics is explaining how energy is composed of matter and can leave the body, affecting various energy layers around it. Science is now explaining what sages, mystics, and religious leaders have professed for thousands of years, that energy travels in

waves and can affect the physical world. Our consciousness is energy that can affect our lives by attracting other energy to it. When we project negative energy outward through self-debilitating thoughts and statements, that energy returns to us. As does positive and uplifting energies that will return better health, happiness and prosperity! It is all based in science!

Quantum physics also supports that our consciousness does not die when the physical body does. Our consciousness is energy that continues on when the body does not. What has been observed during NDE's and in past life regressions (reincarnation) is being explained by the "science' of quantum physics.

The science of quantum physics now explains that our consciousness is energy that can affect our lives, as in New Age thought and that our consciousness is universal energy that can transcend space, time and dimensions as in Metaphysical principles of karma, reincarnation, psychic phenomenon and connecting with those Universal energies. What you are attracting is based on science! What do you want to attract?

http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Are-YOU-Attracting-in-Your-Life?-Connecting-New-Age,-Metaphysics-and-Quantum-Physics&id=9424996

What Is Luck? External Force or State of Mind?

Do you have that person you know that is just always winning things? They always seem to have their name drawn more times than it should. Entering a competition for them normally involves winning. Which begs the question: "Why do some people seem to live a life full of luck whilst others seem to just not?" There seems to be something that separates the lucky from the unlucky.

For a long time, Luck was considered to be an external force only controllable through ritualistic behaviours. These ritualistic behaviours formed the development of the concept of superstitions. This is the reason why some people try to not step on cracks or walk under ladders. In contrast, this is actually far from reality. The reality is far from any external force or act of the divine.

Researchers such as Richard Wiseman have been performing studies into the nature luck for over a decade. Wiseman wanted to ascertain what helped someone to be lucky or unlucky. He studied over 400 people over a 10 year period looking into what they did to create the luck or lack of luck. The crazy thing was that he found, for the most part, people made their own luck, good and bad. While he was interviewing the participants, he found that unlucky people tended to be more anxious and would focus on the specifics of the situation. Lucky people, on the other hand, always seemed to be more relaxed and ready for opportunity to come knocking. There was a definite difference between the two groups!

There is a system in the brain known as the reticular-activating system (RAS) which calculates the importance of incoming data through the senses. We are unable to process all information so some of it is deleted, distorted or generalised to filter out unimportant and unwanted information. When people's attention and intention are on their misfortune, they will filter out situations for them to be lucky. They just won't see it!

The researchers concluded that lucky people were generating their fortune through four key principles:

• Creating and noticing change opportunities

• Made lucky decision by intuition

• Created self-fulfilling prophesies via positive expectations

• Adopted a resilient attitude

Seneca, a famous Roman philosopher, once said "luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity." Be open to opportunity and fortune because it will come knocking. This is not based on belief, this is based in hard science!

http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Is-Luck?-External-Force-or-State-of-Mind?&id=9420274

What Is Luck?

Luck is considered by many to be a force of nature, coming and going as inevitably as the tide.

A study has found that "lucky" individuals usually posses many intersecting qualities, including extroverted personalities, a lack of anxiety, open-mindedness, and optimism. Each of these plays an important role in one's luck production.

The essence of luck is opportunity, so it follows that the more opportunities one encounters and the more receptive one is to those opportunities, the "luckier" one is. It was found that lucky people smile twice as often as others, and engage in more eye contact than unlucky people do. Such outgoing, extroverted behavior exposes a person to more opportunities due to the increased social interaction. Similarly, open-mindedness allows one to encounter a greater number of unique prospects, and makes one more apt to embrace new opportunities.

Born Lucky

Some birthdays are better bets than others. Scientists don't tend to buy into astrology, yet they've established that certain conditions such as schizophrenia, and even personality traits such as novelty seeking, are linked to birth months. It's not the planets at work per se, but rather subtle influences on fetal brain development due to factors including sleep and wake cycles and the prevalence of viruses that differ from season to season.

Across genders and ages, people born between March and August believe themselves to be luckier, on average, than those born in the colder months of September through February. (Relatedly, summer babies grow up to be more open-minded and less neurotic than winter tots.) May is the luckiest month of all.

Think Lucky

The best opportunities arise when you approach life with a flexible mind-set. See how you can get out of the unlucky column:

If you think this way about: Romantic Relationships

"Here's my checklist. He has to be smart, attractive, and financially secure, subscribe to The New York Times, love to cook, and love dogs."

Try this approach instead: "I don't really have a type. I'm open to anyone as long as he's a good person. I'll know it when I see it."

If you think this way about: Work

"I need to finish this project by 11, team meeting at 12, and lunch at 1, finish that report this afternoon, and I'm home free by 6."

Try this approach instead: "I want to try to accomplish two major things today, but in my downtime, I'm going to explore a few other ideas that could help the company or my career."

If you think this way about: Friendships

"I already have a handful of really wonderful friends. I don't need or have time for anymore."

Try this approach instead: "I love to make new friends, even if it never goes farther than a conversation and being friends on Facebook."

If you think this way about: Errands

"I need to hit the dry cleaner, the bank, and the grocery store. I should be home in time for the game."

Try this approach instead: "I have to get these things done, but I'm not going to rush because I don't really know what to expect or whom I'll meet. It will be interesting to see how it works out."

If you think this way about: Business Meetings

"I'm meeting up with this person to do a deal, not thinking of them as a friend or a potential partner."

Try this approach instead: "I'll accept a meeting with anyone, anytime, because you never know where it might lead-even if its five years down the road."

Lucky and Unlucky people- A comparison

Unlucky people often fail to follow their intuition when making a choice, whereas lucky people tend to respect hunches. Lucky people are interested in how they both think and feel about the various options, rather than simply looking at the rational side of the situation. I think this helps them because gut feelings act as an alarm bell - a reason to consider a decision carefully.

Unlucky people tend to be creatures of routine. They tend to take the same route to and from work and talk to the same types of people at parties. In contrast, many lucky people try to introduce variety into their lives. For example, one person described how he thought of a color before arriving at a party and then introduced himself to people wearing that color. This kind of behavior boosts the likelihood of chance opportunities by introducing variety.

Lucky people tend to see the positive side of their ill fortune. They imagine how things could have been worse. In one interview, a lucky volunteer arrived with his leg in a plaster cast and described how he had fallen down a flight of stairs. I asked him whether he still felt lucky and he cheerfully explained that he felt luckier than before. As he pointed out, he could have broken his neck.

Four principles to help one increase their good fortune:

Principle One: Maximize Chance Opportunities Lucky people are skilled at creating, noticing and acting upon chance opportunities. They do this in various ways, including networking, adopting a relaxed attitude to life and by being open to new experiences.

Principle Two: Listening to Lucky Hunches Lucky people make effective decisions by listening to their intuition and gut feelings. In addition, they take steps to actively boost their intuitive abilities by, for example, meditating and clearing their mind of other thoughts.

Principle Three: Expect Good Fortune Lucky people are certain that the future is going to be full of good fortune. These expectations become self-fulfilling prophecies by helping lucky people persist in the face of failure, and shape their interactions with others in a positive way.

Principle Four: Turn Bad Luck to Good Lucky people employ various psychological techniques to cope with, and often even thrive upon, the ill fortune that comes their way. For example, they spontaneously imagine how things could have been worse, do not dwell on the ill fortune, and take control of the situation.

Unsurprisingly, optimism plays a key role in luckiness, since it strongly affects luck production and luck perception. A study shows that a lucky, optimistic person is far more satisfied with all areas of their lives than an unlucky, pessimistic person. An optimist feels lucky for spotting a silver lining, however gray the cloud... yet a pessimist will curse their luck even in the face of good fortune, because they can't see past the green grass on the other side of the fence.

Fortunately, one's mindset is entirely within one's control. An unlucky person who resolves to change their luck can become more social; they can make a conscious effort to be optimistic and make the best of any situation; and they can be more open to new ideas and experiences.

http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Is-Luck?&id=9460234

The Problem With Being a "Problem - Seeker"

Many people claim that problems seem to always find a way to get to them. No matter what they do say or think, problems and misfortunes would find them in any situation. But why is it that these problems 'follow' them around? Are some people just 'unlucky'?

Well technically, yes. Some people are indeed more likely to get into problems than others. But the reason why isn't because they are unlucky. It's because of their own thoughts, words and actions.

These people, who seem to have problems following them around would all seem to have certain similar traits. One of them would be that they are constantly thinking about only problems, never solutions. When they think about these problems, their thoughts would send out powerful vibrations and attract to them... more problems!

As they attract more problems towards them, they would begin to wonder why is it that they always seem to find more problems. And as they continue thinking about that they continue sending out thoughts to bring them... guess what? More problems!

Basically they just continue living in this self-fulfilling cycle of problems for as long as they continue to focus on all their problems. It's that simple. Now, what's the solution to this major problems that they have here?

Believe it or not the problem that they are facing here isn't that hard to overcome. They just need to do one thing. They would need to switch the way they think from focusing on problems to focusing on solutions. Whenever a problem occurs they would need to automatically think of ways to overcome the problem instead of getting upset over it.

I know it can be a little confusing but here's an example to help you figure out what I'm talking about. Every Saturday you go cycling with your friends around the place where you live at. But one Saturday morning you find that your bike seems to have a flat tyre so you can't go. You feel upset. Another problem. All you wanted to do was go cycling which would have been good for your health and now you can't. You've also already promised your friends how are you going to tell them you can't go? They would be so disappointed.

The real problem here is that you were too busy thinking about the problem. It would have been so much easier if you saw the flat tyre and thought, hmm... a flat tyre, I guess I should stop by the bicycle shop before I go anywhere today and get it fixed.

This is how people attract problems. A small problem occurs and they make a big deal about it while they could have easily focused on a solution and got the whole situation sorted out quickly.

The solution to having problems is to think of the solution! So try it out and see if you can find the solutions to your problems.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Problem-With-Being-a-Problem---Seeker&id=9282791

The One Thing That Pushes People to Succeed

Back in my days as a college coach, I looked for one thing in a prospect. It wasn’t size, speed or strength. It wasn’t even talent, for that matter. The first thing I looked for was hunger. Without this intangible none of the aforementioned tangibles mattered.

I wanted players who had chips on their shoulders. The right kind of chip, not a negative attitude, but rather the feeling that they have something to prove. They had to be hungry to prove other coaches wrong who told them you’re too small, too slow, not athletic or strong enough. Their hunger drove them. It also engendered an incredible level of loyalty in the one person who saw something in them.

It’s the same thing I look for today in the clients, coaches and athletes I work with. Why? Because they’re my kind of people. Quite simply, I relate well to them because I see a little bit of myself in them. I was the athlete who was told he didn’t have what it took and I was the student who was told he wasn’t smart enough.

Most people are going to go one of two ways with that information. They will either listen to that feedback and it will become self-fulfilling or it will drive them because they’re hungry -- hungry to succeed and prove the naysayers wrong in the process.

Case in point: I have two former college players who have pursued careers in comedy. They’re the same age and began doing stand-up at the same time. "Brad" is wildly successful and is considered one of the hot, young comics and actors in America. "Jason" had his career plateau early and has struggled to make a name for himself outside of his local market. Brad graduated and moved out to LA with no backup plan in place if he didn’t “make it.” Jason took a corporate 9-to-5 job and worked his comedy craft evenings and weekends.

When Jason called me for advice on taking his game to the next level, I told him, “Stop treating your dream like a hobby, quit your day job and pursue comedy with everything you have.” 

After a few seconds of awkward silence, his response was, “But it’s hard to be funny when you’re hungry.” I replied, “It’s hard to be successful when you’re not.”

Fast forward a couple years, Brad is a mega-entrepreneur. Meanwhile, Jason remains a “wantrepreneur” stuck at the same plateau he was when we last spoke. Some might say he was afraid to commit, I’d say he just wasn’t hungry enough. The bottom line is that you can’t teach hunger. People either have it or they don’t.

Being hungry does five key things.

1. Hunger eliminates failure as an option.

When you’re hungry you go all in and push all your chips to the center of the table. There is no plan B.

2. Hunger drives improvement.

When you’re hungry, “good enough” isn’t. When you’re not, good enough always is.

3. Hunger fuels solutions.

When you’re hungry enough, you’ll either find a way or make one. When you’re not, you’ll find an excuse.

4. Hunger is a driver.

You don’t have to micromanage the hungry. They’re so self-motivated they’ll push themselves harder than you could push them.

5. Hunger opens eyes.

The hungry have their eyes open to identify a small window of opportunity and turn it into a gaping hole.

I speak from experience on all five of these. In 2004 I was fired from my coaching job for not winning a national championship. I had a mortgage, a wife and newborn to try to support. Fired coaches are pretty much radioactive for at least a year or two and no one is going to hire them. I also came to the realization I didn’t want someone else controlling my destiny ever again. Suffice it to say, I was hungry.

That was the day I officially became an entrepreneur. I had to find a solution and create my own opportunity because failure wasn’t an option. Had I had a comfortable day job, I wouldn’t have been driven enough to take the massive action necessary.

Hunger is a game changer. Leaders, do yourself a favor recruit and hire for hunger. If you don’t hire people hungry to get to the next level, then who is going to push your team or company to its next level? Entrepreneurs and wantrepreneurs, the best thing you can do is go all in and bet on yourself. If you don’t, nobody else will.

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/246822