How Do You Make A Difference? (By Shirley Taylor)

I'm a big believer in lifelong learning, and I feel something that we must never stop continuously improving is our communication skills. The way we communicate can often mean the difference between success and failure in getting a job done, building or busting a relationship, making or breaking a friendship, or indeed getting that promotion!

"Good morning" makes a difference!

I remember one morning quite early I met my two assistants for a training programme. Just as the lift door was closing on the ground floor, a guy rushed into the lift. He did not acknowledge us, turned around, and pressed a button. I then said, much more cheerfully than I felt, "Good morning!" This guy almost jumped out of his skin, but he half-turned towards me and nodded his head. When the lift approached his floor, he walked out, and after three steps he turned around, smiled, and said, "Have a great day!"

Wow! Bingo! Two things happened here. Even though it was early and I wasn't feeling particularly cheerful at that moment, I did something that made a positive difference to the guy in the lift. And he also made a positive difference to me and my assistants. And who knows who else he acknowledged or spoke to for the rest of the day to continue making a difference to others.

A smile and a kind word makes a difference!

This incident reminded me of something that had happened several months ago when I was training overseas with a colleague, Marianna Pascal. Marianna and I were waiting for the lift to head down to breakfast. As the lift doors opened to reveal about 8 or 9 people, Marianna walked in, smiling broadly, and said, "Good morning everyone!" Well you can imagine the shocked faces! But what happened next was magical. Marianna and I did not immediately turn our backs to the others. We stayed facing them, and we started chatting. Everyone started smiling and chatting back. Where are you from? How long are you here? What convention are you attending? Which of the sights did you enjoy the most? By the time we all got down to the main floor, we were all laughing and having a great time.

Did we make a positive difference to these people? We certainly did! Did we make a difference to their day? Absolutely! And who knows how many of those people subsequently went on to do something similar to make a positive difference to other people's days.

How do YOU make a difference?

Whether you think you do or don't, trust me, you do make a difference! However, sometimes it's not always positive. And trust me, when you make a negative difference, people will remember you - but for all the wrong reasons!

It's not hard to make a positive difference. Sometimes all it takes is a smile or a kind word.

So how will you make a positive difference today? I'd love to hear from you!

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Why Making Others Happy Can Make You Happy

When people feel happy, they experience positive feelings which they attribute as being something good.

But when people make someone other than themselves happy, it amplifies those positive feelings even bigger, more and further.

That's why people feel great about themselves and are inherently fulfilled when they know they have made a positive difference to someone's lives.

In fact, if you are ever feeling down yourself, one way to bring yourself up is to find ways to make others happy. This will give you an emotional boost you need.

When you strive to make others happy, they notice. They will have a boost in their mood which you will see that reaction in their face immediately. Sometimes, this random act of kindness may somehow return to you immediately or sometime in the future.

The great part about making others happy is it is relatively easy to do.

It can be as simple as giving someone a genuine compliment. Or it can be volunteering to help out your colleague whose workload is overextended. Sometimes, simply expressing your appreciation to someone can uplift their spirits no matter how small the task that you are thanking them for is.

One really easy way to make people happy is to smile.

Smiling is a warm and friendly act that most people will respond to positively by smiling back. A smile is a form of welcoming and shows that you are opening yourself up to those people. It gives people an invitation to approach you.

Another way to make someone happy is to actively listen to them. You would be amazed at how effective this is.

Most people aren't good listeners because they tend to wait for the silent moment so that they themselves can talk and express their opinions. However, if you can stand out from the crowd and be a fantastic listener, they will fall in love with spending time with you as hanging out with you makes them feel happy.

If you want to go a step further in making others happy, try to learn more deeply about the people whom you want to make happy.

Be curious and interested in what they do. Then, if you see something related to their interests, either bring it to their attention or relate to them with your experience about that thing so that both of you are connecting in an emotional expressive level.

Of course, you should never use these skills to manipulate, trick or deceive people in order to make them happy. This type of malicious intention will be caught (especially by the intuitive sociable people) and hurt you and your reputation very quickly.

People will appreciate you much more and will respond positively to your efforts to make them happy instead of trying to get something out of it for yourself. And when you do it in a value-giving, non-needy, generous way, they will more likely to reciprocate and do awesome things for you to make you happy.

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Why Your Why Is Important

"When your why is big enough, you will find your how."

Why Do You Do What You Do?

It is important to have a clear understanding of why you do things in life. Your understanding will make you realise how important is the reason behind your doing. You may find out that the thing that you're doing doesn't have a great reason or purpose behind it.

For instance, you may have a job that you consider to be decent. The thing is that you haven't really questioned why you are working in this job. Sure, it pays well, and you don't mind the work.

But there's something deep down telling you that this job is not who you are and that there is something greater for you to do. That is your why speaking to you. It is trying to get you to question whether there is a greater purpose for what you do.

Think about the important reasons for why you work other than earning money. Do you enjoy what you do? Are you passionate? Does it make a positive difference to people's lives? Are you able to enjoy more time outside of work with friends and family?

Having a greater purpose besides earning money to just 'survive' is so important. Once you are doing things with real purpose you will start enjoying your life and living it to the fullest. You will also be able to continue what you do in the long-run, even when the going gets tough.

Most people try to figure out how to do something, before they know why they are doing it. The 'how' comes naturally when the 'why' has been understood. Even if you don't know how something is done, as long as you know why you are doing it, you will eventually get there.

Your why is the motivation and the drive. It is the reason you won't give up and you will keep going until you achieve the things that you want.

A couple of years back, I remember when my parents didn't have the money to pay for a very expensive private college that they wanted me to attend. They didn't know at all how they would pay for it, all they knew is that I would have a better chance at graduating with high grades and a better career.

So they decided that I would attend the college. During my time at college, my parents started working harder, loans were taken and somehow we managed to pay for all the fees. If we didn't have a big why, I wouldn't have been able to continue with my studies.

Another example, is that of my Online Business that is solely run over the Internet, with the purpose to help people to earn a living through establishing their own online businesses.

The real reason for choosing this career path is that I am able to work under my own terms, choosing my own working hours and location. Furthermore is the opportunity I have of helping others to create their own online businesses and live a similar lifestyle as mine. This is my why. This is the reason why I enjoy it and continue to do it.

Remember to have clarity of your why with whatever it is that you do. It will make you realise the bigger purpose in your life, and it will be your motivation and drive.

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