We Learn Life Lessons From the People Who Come Into Our Lives (By Gary Wonning)

One of the hot topics in today's culture is bullying.

It can be a real issue for those, especially the young, who are affected by this. It can be a very traumatic experience for those who are victimized.

The only problem is, there are no victims in life, only participants. These so called bullies come into our lives for a reason. All we need to do is to discover the reason we are being taken advantage of, and take appropriate action to resolve the issue to our advantage and improve our lives in the process.

Sometimes the solution is a physical solution and we need to deal with it physically to teach the person a lesson he or she will remember for time immemorial.

But most often, it doesn't need to end this way.

On a more subconscious level, the bully is trying to teach us a lesson, once that is discovered, many times we can view that soul as someone who really made our life better by teaching us to become more self reliant, or guide us on a path of greater creativity.

If we go within, many times we will discover talents we never knew we had, sometimes these talents would never be discovered unless we are shunned by others and the only friend we have is ourself and God. Once we do some soul searching we discover many things about ourself we never knew existed.

We all have potential beyond our wildest dreams, but until we are forced to discover them, they go unnoticed. Only when an event outside ourselves creates an environment where we go must go within to find hidden strength, do we discover what we are really capable of accomplishing.

Suppose you have the ability to become a great actor of singer, but because you are shy you never even think you could become what you dream.

By suppressing your dream, you become even more shy by denying what your real character is, the more you talk yourself out of your dream, the more shy and unhappy you become until you are just downright miserable.

You would never get out of this vicious cycle if someone or something didn't come along and rock your boat.

Because, on some level of consciousness, we all create everything we experience, your subconscious mind, or higher self, (what many refer to as our Christ Consciousness) springs into action and begins the search for an answer to make you a better person and enable you to accomplish your life mission.

Here comes the bully, who has volunteered his time to help you. Sooner or later, his actions, or the actions of another soul if he should fail, will wake you to the reality of life, be it this lifetime or the next. It is your choice.

By his actions and yours, you are both evolving into a higher understanding of life.

Many believe the philosophy that we, each and everyone of us create our own reality, but when the going gets tough their belief falters just when it is imperative they stand strong for their beliefs.

This is the time one needs to do some serious contemplative thinking and look within and ask ourselves why we allowed this to happen to us.

When we do we will receive the answer and by owning up to the responsibility of creating our reality, we can overcome this obstacle and go on to lead the life we want and desire.

No one can do this for us, not our parents, family, the government or any one else, it is for us to do and for us alone.

It is only then that we can be proud of what we have overcome, and thank those who have aided us in our journey.

https://ezinearticles.com/?We-Learn-Life-Lessons-From-the-People-Who-Come-Into-Our-Lives&id=10047353

How You Can Be As Mentally Tough As A Samurai

I once heard a story about a Japanese Samurai in war torn Japan.

The samurai I am speaking of was a pupil to a highly regarded Samurai who won countless battles.

One day, the pupil went to his master and asked him for guidance.

The war torn Samurai looked at his pupil calmly and nodded for him to proceed.

The pupil anxiously asked, "How do I train my mind to be as tough as yours?"

The Samurai paused for just a moment and slowly pointed outside.

it was the middle of winter and just the night before a fresh coat of snow piled upon the ground.

The pupil was confused...

The Samurai said, "If you wish to have an unshakable mind, take off your clothes and stand in the snow."

This story just gives you a glimpse on how tough the Samurai were.

Standing butt naked in the dead of winter in a pile of snow... we can barely survive our morning drives without our heat blasting!

Now before you go running off naked into the snow I'm going to ask you to pump the breaks.

Cops will be called in no time and you will have one awkward story to tell.

But there is something we can take away from the Samurai on how to build our mental toughness.

Something we can do today to start our journey to mental fortitude.

This "something" is a ritual we all do every day (hopefully).

Drum roll please!

Take cold showers.

I can hear you gasp now.

But yes, as warriors ourselves, mental toughness is necessary to build and create the lives we desire.

The lives that we deserve.

So lets take a lesson form these elite warriors.

Cold showers are a great, effective way to build our mental toughness. You will be amazed on how this can change your life for the better.

Some aspects that I noticed ever since I started taking cold showers were:

1. Increased confidence

2. Procrastination vanished

3. Increased energy

4. Anxiety diminished

5. Skin cleared up

These were just some of the benefits I experienced in the first 2 weeks of doing cold showers.

So what are you waiting for?

One thing every elite warrior does is take action.

Lets take a page out of the Samurai playbook and work on strengthening our minds for anything life may throw!

Keep growing warrior!

https://ezinearticles.com/?How-You-Can-Be-As-Mentally-Tough-As-A-Samurai&id=9956512

Message From the Universe: The Purpose of Complaining

"Once you realize that everything you've ever been through - every scuffed knee, lost deal, and broken heart - will eventually play wildly in your favor, it's kind of hard to complain.

Not that you would anyway.

Tallyho, ho, ho -

The Universe"

Now let's say you do complain, who listens to you anyways, right? We all have our own problems, and the only thing you get out of complaining is having less and less people around you listening to your crap. You want complain? Go, just make sure you complain to a wall, because this is what going to be left once you have brought in so much negativity into your life and to your friends and family. Avoid that at all cost. You have issues? Start by working on finding solution to these issues. Get away from toxic relationships if you are in one or two. Work on making yourself a better person first before you expect others to be better towards you. Change your inner world before tackling the outside one. It will make a huge difference in your life. That is a promise.

So how do you approach negativity or current events in your life that are not so appealing? Well, try looking at these uncontrollable events as them happening whether you like it or not. Instead of trying to battle them, embrace them, learn to accept them. Afterwards, work on extracting the good from the bad. You say there is nothing good coming out of it? I beg to differ. There is ALWAYS a good out of every bad. The answer is: "LESSON". You are constantly learning through this wonderful journey we call life. From an inside perspective, I agree that it might not look very convenient for you, but no matter what happens, you have learned a valuable lesson and as long as you are not repeating these same mistakes again that created this terrible ordeal, you will be able to tap yourself in the back for surviving it and live to tell the tale. This is definitely priceless.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-The-Purpose-of-Complaining&id=9663492

Message From the Universe: You've Done It - Bravo!

"I just can't think of anything more important to tell you today than "Congratulations, outstanding, well done!"

You are now, officially, the person you once dreamed you'd become.

It always works, 

The Universe"

You dreamed it, and it all happened. Many of us dream, come up with genius ideas for products, ventures or whatever else. We think about it but unfortunately for many, we stop here. We just think, and some time wait for the best time to bring this idea/dream/intent to reality and it never happens. We look at others follow their dreams and risk it all and succeed. Of course, there are some who do the same and fail and let their failure dictate the rest of their lives. You can't let that happen. If you fail, look at it as a lesson, a lesson to do better, a lesson to grow from this failure and not repeat the same mistakes. Tony Robbins, Zuckerburg, Trump, Besos and all the others who risked it all and jump into the unknown to follow their dreams and became the top 4% richest humans on this planet. They didn't let anything take them away from their ultimate purpose of becoming who they are today. They had that intuition, that desire, that purpose to do what they truly believed in and looked into the future with clarity and loads of determination. This is what a true entrepreneur is. Did they fail? Dammmm yeahhhhh. Many times over but did that deter them from pursuing their goals? Hell NO!

Life will throw you tons of challenges to overcome, obstacles to avoid and everything else that will come towards you and possibly bring you to dementia or/and full blown depression. It will be up to you to fight these urges to let life take over and do whatever it takes to move forward and learn from it. It is inevitable that these negative feelings will sometimes take over and block us from our initial pursuit of success but that can ONLY happen if you allow it. More difficult the challenges are to bring yourself to ultimate success, better it is for you. If it was that easy, you wouldn't feel that accomplished. You would always think that everyone else can do it, so you are not that special. However, when you do overcome what seems to be impossible and come out as a winner, you will change the way you look at things from this point forward and nothing will ever stop you from reaching your ultimate happiness.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-Youve-Done-It---Bravo!&id=9617472

Message From the Universe: May the Force Be With You

"No matter what "they" say and no matter what they do, and no matter what they don't say or don't do, they actually love you.

I know because they told me.

I love you,

The Universe"

When you speak to people about your goals and dreams, even with family and friends, you may encounter some resistance. Some might try to discourage you and consider it as constructive criticism about your intentions. WE all should welcome constructive criticism but you need to take it from people who experienced it themselves. Someone who have never taken any risk in life, have worked their 9-5pm job for the past 25 years aren't in a position to tell you what will work and what won't. So what do you do? Listen or ignore advice from family and friends? Well, it is really up to you. As you know, your family will always LOVE you no matter what you do, as long as you keep things legal and safe for everyone. However, you can't let others dictate your dreams by telling you if your venture will work or fail. Let's say you experience failure, the best thing that would come out of it is a lesson right? So it is CRUCIAL for you to fail in life, and fail not once, but many many times. There is NO better school than life experiences. Take advantage of those lessons and as long as you learn from them, you are gold.

You want to live your life to the fullest so start doing that TODAY. Do not wait for the best timing, or when you finish your studies, or when you have a better job, or a bigger home or this or that. You want to make changes today and whatever obstacles you will face along the way, just deal with it and move on. There is no better time to do things than NOW, right at this moment. Every human beings in this planet are seeking the ONE thing in common, being happy. Some will use money for them to reach that happiness, others will be health, or any other venue to reach that ultimate level of joy. The key here is to apply what you've learned and most importantly avoid making the same mistakes over again. You want to move forward, not backward. Just like the Big Bang, it all started with the concept of singularity, where all matter was so dense within that infinitesimally small point that everything exploded with such a force to create what we see today, OUR UNIVERSE. We also started as a tiny egg in our mom womb to become who we are today. We constantly change for the better, at least I hope, but it really never ends. Just like everything else in life, we all need to grow and become the best we can be. That is why learning is a lifelong journey, because knowledge never really ends, unless you allow it to happen.

https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=6264188750322763261#editor/target=post;postID=5106076541293333931

You Got Triggered, Now What? Reflections on Mindfully Moving Through a Stress Response (By Jennifer C Jackson)

I had just done the very thing I advise people not to do. I was all relaxed and ready for bed, but decided to check my email one last time. In truth, I had been having a tense online conversation, and was hoping to find a peaceful resolution in my in-box. Unfortunately, the opposite was true. Our miscommunication had taken an even worse turn and now there was a toxic blast waiting for me. Sure enough, I could feel my heart racing, my brainwaves moving faster, and stress hormones coursing through my body. Not what you want when preparing for sleep!

In the past this would have completely overwhelmed me. As my body moved into fight or flight, panic would have set in - both around the content of the email and the fact that my body had moved completely in the opposite direction of sleep right at bedtime. I would have felt like a helpless victim. Sleep would have been out of the question for that night and this one little incident could easily have started a two month bout of insomnia.

Now I can't say I was able to go right to bed after this and fall into a deep, peaceful sleep, but I did have strategies in place that helped me keep my power and perspective, and drastically shorten the effects.

In this case, the very first thing I did was laugh! What was I thinking checking my email like that when I knew a toxic nugget was a possibility? I had broken my own rule and now I was paying the price. Okay, so be it. I was clearly going to be awake for a bit, so it was time to make the best of the situation.

When my husband went to bed, I settled down on the couch, knowing I might be there for a while. I became very present with the physical stress symptoms. I tapped on my racing heart and mind and the stress hormones I could feel rushing through my body. I tapped and tapped until it became slightly less intense.

Next, I took this as an opportunity to grow and learn. What about this email had triggered me so badly? What part of this could I own? What could I do differently next time to avoid a miscommunication like this in the future? What lesson, gift, or gem might be buried in this situation? As I answered these questions in my journal, I tapped on the various responses. Finally around 1:00 a.m., I felt my body shift and knew I would be able to get some sleep. It was not my best night, but far better than it would have been in the past.

It took a few more days of deep inner work and tapping to fully mine the gem out of the situation -- and my sleep was off for a couple of nights as well. However, because I managed to stay present the whole time - both with my mind and with the effects on my body - I never felt out of control or helpless. I knew resolution would come one way or another and that my sleep would calm down as well.

After a time, the situation did resolve. It was not the way I would have originally chosen, but I know now it is the highest and best resolution for all concerned. And my sleep has been great!

http://ezinearticles.com/?You-Got-Triggered,-Now-What?-Reflections-on-Mindfully-Moving-Through-a-Stress-Response&id=9494500

When Life Throws You a Curve Ball

It is an established fact that change is the only constant in life. Despite being aware of this, we somehow expect all good things to remain as they are forever. We forget that life is based on the continual occurrence of the cycle of birth and death and everything else in between. Therefore, expecting life to remain at a standstill is highly unrealistic!

Many gradual changes are part of life and we accept them as such, be it changing seasons, evolving relationships, or the ever-changing dynamics of professional lives. As long as the changes within each of these are nominal or gradual, we are able to adapt and accept the reality that there are good days and there are bad days, and we are okay with that.

But what happens when life throws you a curve ball and suddenly you find yourself in a situation for which you are not prepared?

This usually means that you've been forced out of your comfort zone by a change that is inevitable, and whatever the reason, this huge change can cause you to lose your balance in life, even for a little while.

Your life may change drastically in an hour or a minute, or even in a few seconds, and nothing will ever be the same. When you find yourself in a moment like this, you may feel like you're walking on a tightrope, struggling to find your balance and convinced that you will fall into an abyss.

Frustrated is probably a small word for what you feel, but this is the time when you need to be strong and focus on what can be done to get you back on track.

From spilled coffee to lost keys, to a misplaced cell phone, there are innumerable negative incidents that can put us in a slump. But what if a negative incident of greater significance occurs, such as falling out with your best friend or life-partner, the loss of a job or a terrible car accident?

Sadly, we are the toughest on ourselves when something like this happens. Most of us react by indulging in self-victimization, angry reactions, or self-blame, often slipping into depression or dejection.

You may have to go through all these emotions before you come upon the realization that none of it was yours or anyone else's fault. Give yourself a break! As long as you are living in this world, there will be ups and downs. If it is any consolation, understand that you are not the only individual on earth faced with downturns.

Negative events can happen to anyone and it is only how you select to deal with the turn of events is what will set you apart. You can manage negative situations in a positive manner and come out stronger, wiser and a better person by following these steps:

Releasing your frustrations will help because if you stifle them, you may collapse with the stress. Write about your problem, or talk to a friend or family member. Exercising or going for a walk also does wonders.

Give yourself time to be sad or grieve; a week or a few days, or whatever you feel you need to come to terms with the unfortunate incident. Beyond that self-assigned deadline, you need to get back to your usual routine and take charge of your life!

Remember that you are not the only one going through a difficult life event like yours and there is surely someone else somewhere in the world who is experiencing the same struggle. This will help you to get over the feeling of being a victim.

Understand that feeling frustrated about what you cannot undo will keep the problem as it is. Reflect calmly on what you can do to resolve your problem and focus on finding solutions.

Never believe yourself to be up against a wall; you can always choose how to react. You may not have any control over external events, but your reactions and behavior are always in your control.

Look at the incident that has upset you objectively and remove all your feelings from the analysis. Consider yourself standing outside the incident viewing it as it happens to someone you don't know. This will enable you to objectify the event.

Turn your focus and attention on what you can do to make the situation better. Taking the smallest action towards resolving the problem will make you feel empowered. Not only does action create possibilities, it also brings results. Instead of being a passive receiver, you are now a thoughtful creator.

Don't hesitate to ask for help from friends, family or colleagues. Go through your list of contacts and see who you know who can help you get out of this crisis. Remember that you would do the same if your friends needed your help.

Rather than an obstacle, see your problem as a step in your life's journey towards learning. A negative incident is an obstacle if it stops you from reaching your objectives, and if you continue to overcome the curved balls as they come, you are moving ahead in life.

You must always learn a lesson from a negative life incident, so look for the one you need to learn from this experience and apply it to yourself so that you never have to face this situation again.

Irrespective of what life throws at you, if you're coping with it in a constructive manner, remember that no one and nothing can pull you down!

http://ezinearticles.com/?When-Life-Throws-You-a-Curve-Ball&id=9440835

The Paradox of Being Extraordinary

It's been a while since I spoke with my friend who I consider to be the wisest man in the world. On this visit, as usual, he sparked up an amazing conversation. He spoke to me about his life long commitment to befriend exceptional people. He said they empower him to raise the stakes in his personal and professional ambitions. He spoke in detail about what he learned from them. More importantly, he spoke about the unexpected and sometimes twisted path to become extraordinary.

To start, he stated, most people are unwilling to pay the price of entry to live an extraordinary life. He went on to say while practicing, planning and preparing are definitely important, they are not enough to be exceptional. To be exceptional, you have to learn to see the world from uncommon perspectives.

He continued with: in my observation, the most extraordinary people I know never had lives that moved in straight lines. Their lives met with derailment, failure and roadblocks. Yet, they persevered.

What I found most interesting was the manner in which people's lives were completely transformed. Many people experience the birth of their first child as life changing. And it can be. Except, there are many people with children and their lives rarely transform in a way that makes them exceptional. For most people, life changing means do more, better or different of the thing one has always done.

On the other hand, the paradox of extraordinary people is they often encounter a situation that may appear unbearable at first. Even though it can sometimes be a situation that makes one want to give up, it changes them and their view of the world. As a word of caution, if it is a temporary situation, the transformation will be temporary.

For example, there is a company that does personality assessments. This particular company had done assessments of people working for businesses in the World Trade Center before September 11th, 2001. After the collapse of the towers, many of the same people took the personality assessment. As a result of the incident, there were significant changes to people's personalities. However, three years later the same people took the assessments again. This time their personalities returned to pre 911 results. While I'm sure there were some who transformed permanently, the vast majority of people returned to who they had always been.

From what I've observed, people who transform permanently experience prolonged strife like war, death of a loved one, failure, terminal illness or an accident that impairs their physical abilities. For others, it can be an experience in another country, soul mate, workshop or a one-time encounter with a stranger.

Whether the experience is perceived as positive or negative, it is usually unexpected and disruptive to one's life. In some way, those exceptional people's view of reality was permanently altered. They not only saw the world differently. They saw themselves differently.

While their circumstance first appeared unfortunate, it is often the harsh encounters with life that caused them to think differently and take actions that once seemed uncharacteristic of them. In fact, those situations forced them from their projected paths and placed them into entirely new possibilities. Each and every extraordinary person I know has a story of misfortune that became his or her catalyst for success. At first, it is difficult to see the connection. Except, if extraordinary people examine their lives thoroughly, without fail, there will be a story of adversity that changed them forever.

For those who endeavor to live a life without adversity or failure, they are cheating themselves. Unfortunate circumstances can break people out of ordinary thinking. It forces one to see themselves and the world from new perspectives. While it is true adversity can be disheartening, there is usually a silver lining, even if it is a lesson.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Paradox-of-Being-Extraordinary&id=9427054

How a Positive Attitude Can Impact Your Life

I am going to be pretty straight with you about this one.

I am all about those happy, positive vibes! I repel negativity and personally consider it a sin. Who has time for the sad, lost and the unhappy, when there is a life full of amazing possibilities and exciting opportunities waiting to be lived?!

I am in no way saying that I stay 100% positive all the time. That's not really possible. Life does throw you a wicked one every now and then. At such a point, laughing would be downright stupid. But if there is the slightest bit of hope in such a situation then you must find it, no matter what the cost!

That's the simple philosophy of positivity.

Most people use the terms 'positivity' and 'optimism' synonymously. That's absolutely wrong and you need to know the difference between the approaches. Because how will you stay positive if you don't know, what all goes into the mix?

So let's get the difference sorted first.

Positivity, means accepting that there is every possibility of things not working out or situations going sour; and still choosing to look for a way out of the problem. It is a thought process, a way of thinking.

Optimism, on the other hand is a belief. It is the belief that no matter what happens, things will ultimately work out. It's also refusing to believe or accept that things could go sideways.

Positivity or Positive thinking is a wider concept, which includes concepts like optimism, happiness, cheerfulness, etc. in it. So the aim isn't to be the most optimistic. That you will become eventually, when things go your way. The aim is to be positive. It is to develop a positive attitude towards whatever you do. It is, in a way, forcing your mind to accept that despite whatever the outcome, it is essential that you stay positive throughout.

While it is easy for someone who is inherently positive, to tell others to stay positive. It can be quite a challenge for someone who is used to being negative, to suddenly wake up and say, "Now on, it's positivity all the way!!" It is never that simple. But, it doesn't have to be all that complicated either. Positivity is a habit that can be easily cultivated. It may seem like an effort initially. But soon it will become part of your life.

Thinking positively will become second nature.

So, given below are some of the most commonly used and easy to apply methods for developing a positive attitude towards life in general.

1. Look the part

Yes. If you look good, you feel great! That is what they say and that is what is true. Don't dress in dark or dull colours, looking prepped to attend a 'mourning' session and then expect to feel all energetic and positive. That's not how it works. Wear clothes that are bright and colourful. I don't mean you need to look like a rainbow! But dress in warm colours. Replace all the dark and morose colours and go for something sunshine and lively. Even if the outfit is a plain Jane. The colours can be bright and happy. Make an effort and look like you have positivity on your mind.

2. Understand that 100% isn't what you always need

Some people have this idea, that if it isn't 100% what they thought, then it isn't worth anything. It may not be what you want. But that does not mean it is not worth anything.What you want and what you need are two entirely different concepts.

When life gives you lemons, you have three options. You can either cry, make lemonade or bring out the tequila. And no I am not joking.

So it isn't the picture perfect thing you imagined or even asked for. But buddy, at least it is something. Would you rather have 50% of something or 100% of nothing? 

The choice is yours.

But remember, somewhere out there, someone would kill to have what you are willing to throw away. Appreciate what you've been handed and try to see the bigger picture.

3. Every cloud has a silver lining

Suppose you are faced with a situation and you know that in the end, it will not go entirely or maybe even partly the way you want it to. So what should you do in such a situation? Quit?

No, you go through with it. Not because you want to prove a point to the world, but because you will be wiser for it. Everything that happens in life is either a blessing or a lesson. You win some, you lose some. But you always gain some.

Also, when one door closes, that's the exact time another one opens. So if you waste time being down about what you lost, you won't be ready to accept what is about to come your way.

Every cloud has a silver lining. It is simply a question of finding it.

4. Wait to Worry

Life may be short, but trust me there is plenty of time to worry. So don't rush it. Wait a bit longer. Stay happy and positive about a situation, a little longer. Smile some more and make others happy. When the time comes, you will have to worry as it is. Why rush it?

Besides, it is scientifically proven that worrying unnecessarily is a far bigger waste of time, energy and resources, than being positive is. Because when you worry, you're too preoccupied to see all the other possibilities around you. But when you are positive, you notice and take in a lot more.

So wait a while. Worry later.

5. Don't subject yourself to negativity

This one I find absolutely bizarre!

There was a show going on, on television. It started as a debate, but ended up becoming a screaming match.

Just before the show started, my friend and I were having a nice cheerful conversation.While watching the show, I realized it was too much nonsense and turned my attention away from the screen. But next to me, my friend was watching the show with crazy attention. At one point when there was an exchange of swear words, she shut her ears, but didn't stop watching it.

This made me wonder who's crazier? The people on the show or the ones watching the show?!

If someone or something around you is not nice or is killing your vibe, why subject yourself to more of it?

Stop! Just stop putting yourself through it!!

You deserve to watch something motivating, energizing, and fun like a cool cartoon movie. Not a bunch of cartoons screaming!

6. Stop and smell the roses!

Get out of the house, take a walk in the garden, actually go smell some flowers, get the good energy flowing in. Surround yourself with all the positivity that nature has already given you. Inside your house your body and mind are both restricted.

Outside, with nature, everything will seem a million times better and so much more beautiful. So make it a point every single day to go out and spend time with yourself.

7. Surround yourself with positive influences

Keep yourself surrounded by people who believe in staying positive. It will eventually rub off. For a few days you'll feel like you're in a crowd of weirdos (believe me, I am one of them). But slowly, their excitement and enthusiasm will spread to you and you will in turn spread it to others.

Positivity is infectious. It spreads without a sound and you'll never know what hit you!

So let this be a mission. Try your hand at some positivity.

Do you think you have what it takes to be positive, come what may?

Good luck!

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-a-Positive-Attitude-Can-Impact-Your-Life&id=9318767