Chances are, the habits you want to change have been hanging around for quite some time. The bad eating habits and the procrastination to do the workout that you know you should. Feeling the frustration and guilt build each time you reach for the chocolate or pizza, beating yourself up and feeling so low that you don't feel like you have the strength to say no to the next temptation. Always feeling tired and out of control.
Are you one of the many who struggle with their finances? Spending more than you earn each month and seemingly in a never ending pile of debt that weighs you down and feels like you will never be able to pay it off. I speak to so many people who want to take action on their business or career and make a change in this area but get stalled and stuck by their inner game (we'll come back to this inner game stuff in a moment).
For many others I speak to, it's their intimate relationships causing them stress. So many folks have got to a place of arguing, resentments and frustrations with each other that being together just doesn't feel like fun anymore. Or maybe you've hit that age old problem of becoming 'room mates'. You know the one, where you love each each other but you're not 'in love' anymore. The passion and the excitement has waned and you simple coexist in a polite but unfulfilling space.
Whatever Changes You Want To Make, It's All About Getting Out Of The Rapids Of Your Life
Imagine, if you will, a beautiful sunny day. The sun is at its highest and warmest point of the day and bathing your skin in life giving warmth and goodness. The water is flowing gently but ever onwards down river as you lie in your small boat with your eyes closed listening to the gentle splashing of the water. As you open your eyes and look about you, lush green grass caress' the land on both sides of the river. In the distance, you see the majesty of a beautiful mountain watching over you as you meander down river on this beautiful care free, peaceful summers day. Peace, tranquillity, contentment, joy, simply being.
This is how life feels for you every day, right? I know, you needn't message me and call me names, I'm kidding. I know this is moments in life for most. And those moments are far too infrequent for most people too.
Life rarely feels like that beautiful sunny day floating down the gentle river. It more often feels like we've hit the rapids, right?! As we cling tightly to the side of the boat, our whole body tensed and stressed as we navigate the next few yards of craziness and danger. We look down the river and only see more rapids and we wonder 'will I be able to hang on long enough to get out of this?!' As we are thrown in all directions, crashing into all sides of our boat, we pray and shout and moan about how we got here and how the hell we are gonna get out.
Eventually the rapids end and we take a deep breath and fall back into the boat exhausted, only to hit the next fork in the river and choose the direction of rapids once more.
Sound familiar? If so, don't worry. If you poke your head above the edge of your boat, you'll see that most people are hitting the rapids far too often and struggling through them along with you. But we can choose differently.
We Can Choose To Miss Most Of The Rapids
How we have been living life is how we've been living life! The beliefs, perspectives, thoughts and emotions we continually and habitually experience are the shapers and moulders of how we perceive life and how it unfolds for us.
If you have an engrained habit of getting angry at the slightest provocation, then you are going to continue to experience getting angry. You keep choosing the rapids, but you can choose the sunny day and gentle flowing option.
If you believe that you don't have what it takes to start the new business or go after the career or job you really want, you are going to feel the inner conflict that will show up in self-criticism, frustration, disappointment or even anxiety or depression.
If you really want to lose weight or get healthy and fit, but you have a belief about how hard it will be, or the fact that friendships or family relationships will be negatively effected, or you don't feel worthy deep down and don't believe you have what it takes to make the change, then get ready for a 'boat load' of rapids! You are going to hit those internal conflicts that are created when what you want can't happen because of the thoughts and emotional habitual patterns you are stuck in.
If you want to fix your finances and have more than enough money to buy the things you want and invest for your future, as well as helping the people around you, but you've got a habit that makes you spend more than you earn each month, you're taking the rapids again. Maybe you want more money, but deep down you have a belief that having plenty makes you fear losing it, or maybe it'll be a lot of work to look after it. Here's a biggy for you, maybe deep down you fear that people will judge you if you make good money and have plenty or it may not feel very spiritual to you.
Truth be told, you have a bunch of 'inner game' stuff going on and it is absolutely stopping you from having the things and experiences you really want in life.
The doubts, fears, insecurities, worries, anxieties, limiting beliefs and perspectives about you, men, women, corporations, planet earth, people's intentions and many other topics that we carry unconscious views about, are scuppering you and making it impossible for things you want to come into your life.
So what the heck do we do about all this? This is the fun bit. This is where change can really take a hold and we begin to feel our life slowly turning in the direction of our dreams and desires and feel that peace and contentment of floating on the calm river on the warm summer day much more of the time.
It doesn't come for free though. There isn't a smart quote or anecdote I can offer you here that will change everything for you. There are however, proven methods of change that you can start practicing regularly that will make all the difference.
The input that your brain receives is a bunch of thoughts and beliefs that are based on your life experience. Everything you've ever seen, heard, tasted, touched or smelled has been stored in your brain. Every emotion you ever felt got stored away. Every conversation you've had or heard in person or through TV or movies is in that brain of yours. Every single experience you have had since you were born has stored away in your brain and formed your beliefs, values and whole perspective of the world and your judgements about what everything means and is the cause for all the rapids you hit and all the beautiful calm waters you want but don't get.
Having more of what you want in life means changing the input. You must put something new into your brain that aligns with what you now want or you'll never have it.
Getting clear on what you really want in as much detail as possible is your first and most important step and most people miss this out. Get crystal clear on what you truly want and what it looks like, feels like, sounds like. How would life look and feel when you have or are doing the thing you want?
The more time you spend thinking about and feeling about how life is with the goal being met, the more you are changing the input in your brain and allowing yourself to choose that plain sailing part of the river more frequently.
The tools are endless: Read books on the topic of having what you want, create a vision board, get on Google and research the probable hundreds and thousands of people teaching the thing you want, set goals, practice affirmations, do clearing work to remove inner blocks, practice visualisations, work with coaches or trainers who specialise in what you want. There are endless tools available, you've simply got to start putting different references in your brain and doing it regularly enough to avoid many of the potential rapids.
Life will always have some rapids for you, regardless what you do. This is life, people pass away, relationships end, sometimes we are ill or things don't work out. This is natural and normal.
Most of the rapids we hit in life however, had a clear sign at the fork in the river that pointed for the calm, flowing river on the sunny day, we just missed the sign because the years of brain input made it invisible to us.
Get clear on what you really want next and start having conversations about it, read about it, talk to friends about it, speak to people who know all about what you want. And find out how to deal with the limits, fears, doubts and insecurities that will inevitably come up on your journey to what you really want in life. This is a sure recipe to creating your dreams.
http://ezinearticles.com/?You-Can-Avoid-Most-of-the-Rough-Rapids-of-Life&id=9584451
