How To Get What You Want With Three Words (By Pam Bauer)

A friend of mine got married last month. As her wedding approached, the question of what to wear loomed large. She didn't want to wear a traditional wedding dress.

A few weeks before the wedding, she went shopping with some friends. They tried bridal boutiques and department stores but she came home empty-handed. Her friends vetoed the dresses she chose; she disliked the dresses they selected.

She was disappointed and frustrated. She doesn't like shopping and didn't have time to traipse all over the city. She dreaded continuing the search.

I wanted to help, but I live 1,000 miles away. What could I do? I asked her this question: What three words describe how you want to feel in your dress on your wedding day?

She paused, then spoke: Comfortable. Elegant. Celebratory.

Ah-ha! That's the dress she's looking for: the dress that feels comfortable, elegant and celebratory. With these three words in mind, she went back to a store she'd visited on her shopping trip and purchased a dress she'd tried on but left behind.

I wasn't surprised. When she was shopping with her well-meaning friends, their ideas of what a wedding dress should look like overwhelmed her own wisdom about what she wanted.

That's the power of three words. They get to the heart of what you wish for and become a GPS to help you navigate the bewildering possibilities in order to find the best option for you.

The key to success with three words is asking yourself how you'll feel when you have what you desire. No matter what it is we want, what we really want is the feeling that the desired result will generate.

Rather than the thing itself, it's the experience of the thing that we seek.

By tapping into those feelings in advance, articulating words to describe them and using the words to guide your choices, you tune out distracting noise (others' opinions, social media trends, companies with gigantic advertising budgets) and avoid buyer's remorse (when what you thought you wanted ends up disappointing).

It's a simple, yet powerful, method to lead you toward fulfilling your dreams.

Want to apply the three words strategy to your life? Here's how:

1. Think of something you want. This can be something you want to acquire (like my friend's wedding dress) or it can be a goal (like a new year's resolution).
2. Imagine the result. What would your life be like if you achieved this? Let you mind fill in as many details as possible of the experience.
3. Generate your three words. What does your imagined result feel like?
4. Look around. What people, places, things, events, or activities can be described by your words? Go forth and bring them into your life.

Let your three words be your guide. They may take you in a direction you didn't expect but it's going to be toward a more fulfilling and satisfying life.

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Get-What-You-Want-With-Three-Words&id=9381743

5 Ways to Succeed at Fulfilling Your Dream

Sad, isn't it?

I mean, you're constantly frustrated with your life. You want to pursue your dreams and live a successful life, but you just can't seem to do it.

Everyone around you seems content with their lives. They seem to have achieved their dreams. Even those who are in the midst of hardship seem to be living their dreams.

And you can't help thinking ... why not me?

And it's a good question.

After all, they're not healthier than you. They're not smarter than you. They're not more interesting than you. But for some reason, they seem to have achieved their dreams without struggle. And you start to wonder...

What's their secret?

In fact, I wondered that too. I've been there, and well ... it's depressing. So, I started doing research on what successful people do differently to fulfill their dreams. And I discovered that those who succeeded had certain characteristics in common. And knowing the truth about these traits they cultivated will change everything for you too.

Use the following five tricks to help you succeed in fulfilling your dreams:

1. Cultivate a growth mindset

People can have two mindsets -- the fixed mindset and the growth mindset.

The fixed-mindset person believes leaders are born. This type of mindset person avoids taking risks because they believe their destiny is already mapped out for them.

The growth-mindset person believes you can achieve your dreams through practice, persistence, and perseverance.

The growth mindset only comes to those who accept it. After accepting a growth mindset, your brain can stretch. And because the brain is like a rubber band, it stretches depending on how much you use it.

With that mindset, you'll develop your strengths toward your dreams because you'll understand it's not through birth that dreams are achieved but rather through pursuing your dreams with maximum effort.

2. Cultivate confidence in your dream

Trust in your ability to fulfill your dream. Get out of your comfort zone. Take risks, and follow your passion day in and day out.

Your dream is a reflection of you, and only you can fulfill it. Without taking the plunge to pursue your dream, you'll stay in the same position, always wishing you had found the courage to pursue it.

Make your dream your top priority. Create a schedule that makes it part of your daily habits. By making it a consistent daily habit, you'll prevent your fears from sabotaging your progress.

Prove to yourself that you're worth giving that dream a shot. Stick to it, not just for weeks or months but for many years to come. Work hard to make the dream a reality.

The more you believe your dream will come true, the more likely you are to achieve it. According to University of Wisconsin neuroscientist, Richard Davidson, the anticipation of achieving your goals makes you work harder toward them.

Believe in your dream, and you will achieve it.

3. Cultivate delayed gratification

Let your dream be your top priority every day. Commit never to postpone working on your dream even when you don't see results right away or when the urge to quit gets overwhelming.

Let the top performers in every field motivate you; they are consistent, and they show up and deliver while everyone else is weighed down by life and that constant battle with procrastination.

Be like those kids who waited for fifteen minutes to eat their marshmallow because they wanted an extra marshmallow. By the way, those kids who waited grew up with better social skills and were more successful according to a follow-up study.

Choose the pain of discipline, and work on your dream every day, no matter how hard things get. You may not see results immediately, but the gratification you feel when all of your efforts finally come to fruition will be worth the wait.

4. Cultivate Healthy Relationships

Human beings are created to be social. Relationships influence our mental health and provide a deep meaning and fulfillment in life. To succeed in life, make healthy relationships your top priority because you need other people to thrive to accomplish your dreams.

A study conducted by Psychiatric George Vaillant on 268 Harvard undergraduate males from the class of 1938 to 1940 concluded that success depended on how well they related to other people and not how much money they had.

So surround yourself with happy people because they'll make you happy too. Refrain from toxic people, those who continuously undermine your dreams. Their negativity will eventually make you doubt your dreams too. Find people who help you believe in yourself and your goals.

5. Cultivate Gratitude

Gratitude strengthens your will power. It keeps you focused on what's working well, which allows you to take actions confidently without letting your fears get in the way.

Gratitude is available to all people. Whether you are sick or well, young or old, as long as you had a meal today, and your heart is beating, you've got something to be grateful for.

People who always feel grateful are the most successful people in life. They view the world as a place full of opportunities, despite their circumstances.

Choose to be grateful no matter your situation. And count the opportunity to pursue your dream as a blessing.

Prove to yourself that you can do it.

You can do so by staying focused on your dream.

Slowly and steadily, keep cultivating a growth mindset, confidence in your dream, delayed gratification, healthy relationships, and being grateful.

Because there is no such thing as being born with success; it's all about grit and sticking with it.

And if you do, you'll experience firsthand the beauty of achieving your dream.

You deserve to succeed.

So start taking action today.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ann-davis/5-ways-to-succeed-at-fulfilling-your-dream_b_8808178.html