Lead Your Mind To Joy

Are you living your life the way you want to live it? Most people say that their daily lives are reactions to what happens to them. Even people who set out to reach a goal, plan to reach it, endure four or more years of education to earn it, and do their best to attain their goal, will say that events that drive their lives are beyond their control, and may be outside of their perception. In other words, they see their lives like a soldier who hunkers down in his foxhole to keep from being hit by incoming rounds. That is no way to live. But, what can you do about it? Plenty.

Whether your life is circumstantial or if you put yourself in such a setting, ask yourself this question: What effect do I want to achieve today? Answer the question in one word, a few, or (in no circumstance) more than one short sentence. Do that, and you can begin to craft boundless options on how you will achieve your daily goal. You have some control in your life.

There may be a problem. If the effect that you chose is to defeat someone or some thing that is shooting incoming rounds at you, you are not in your "happy place." You should determine if your setting is so wrong that you should consider the option to cut your losses to get out. Determine if the stress in your life is a natural outcome (not just affecting you) to the setting. There are bad people in this world. Also, there are uncaring people, self-centered people, folks who will withhold information that is critical to your success, and there are people who see themselves above their obligations. Do you encounter such people in your daily setting? Is your performance influenced by such people? Yes? I can give you hope. Stop being a pawn in their game. Plan your own game. Then make it come true.

Put morality in your game. My morality is to do no harm. Do not do anything illegal, immoral, unethical, or give an appearance that you do such things by your actions. I also add this: Do not tolerate those who commit immoral acts. Call them out. Distance yourself from them if they do not repent. Can you see an element of fun in this now? It is your game. You control your game. You have fun. Just that much gain should change your view of your life. The rest is little things.

See, decide (plan), observe the effect of what you did, revise, and repeat. This is how you change your habits. This is how you gain some control in your life. Measure the results of your new habits. Do they lead you toward achieving your effect? Caution: Do not discuss this change of habit with anyone. If you tell even one person, no matter what promise that you get from them, assume that ten people you don't know will know your plan within a week.

With a goal for the effect that you want, a workable plan, and the will to carry it out, you can chill out. Seek joy. When you wake up each morning to begin your routine, think about the happy things you will do today, little things like the company of a certain person, a cup of coffee, a piece of chocolate, your favorite music, the sunshine on your face. Determine how to weave little bits of joy into your daily routine, as if they are threads of gold woven into your favorite shirt. Do this to get the edge off of the implementation of your plan. You won't look so serious because you are laid back. Your blood pressure will be lower. You will be happier. Express your joy to others. Say hello, chat if it feels right. Share your happiness. Don't share your worries with others. Don't let someone else bury you with their worries.

Do you see it now? Your effect leads you to your goal. You have a plan. You control your plan, and you make it happen. People around you see the glow on your face. You are the person they know who is happy, the one they want to be like. Someone will ask you, "What is your secret?"

http://ezinearticles.com/?Lead-Your-Mind-To-Joy&id=9702951

Feelings Aren't Facts

Often there may be a distortion, be it big or small, regarding how we see ourselves, others, or our lives in general. This distortion, or as I call it, the story we tell ourselves, frequently leads to emotional pain, increased anxiety, and potentially depression. That is because feelings aren't facts.

The phrase, feelings aren't facts, is commonly used in 12-step programs, yet it is profoundly true for all of us. This phrase uses the term, feelings, in such a way that it is not about emotions such as sadness, grief or anger. Instead it refers to our beliefs, perceptions, interpretations and thoughts. It speaks to the ways in which we experience ourselves, or others, in a subjective way.

Perception is Reality

When we say, for example, "I don't feel good enough." How could this statement not create further unease? Although others in our world may perceive us as amazing, or more than good enough, it is what we tell ourselves, even if it is not a fact, that emotionally distresses us.

This may be further exacerbated by making comparisons based on our assumptions about other people. We may tell ourselves, "That woman has got it all together. Look at her. How come I don't?" This story may also not be a fact, yet because we believe it is, it may further exacerbate, or contribute, to the wearing away of our self-esteem.

Fact or Fiction

When we operate from a place of misconception, distortion, or fiction, then we walk through the world from this place. This can produce a distortion of ourselves, of other people in our lives, or the world in general. If we function from a place of fear, anxiety or anger our perception of reality can be tainted with negativity. These painful feelings, although triggered by non-facts, can still ultimately affect us.

Another person's comment may remind us of something that occurred in our history. Accusations and judgements that occurred in our childhood, or adolescence, that were not resolved may influence our interpretation of circumstances in our current lives. The other person, and even ourselves, may have no idea this unresolved issue has influenced our perception unless this interaction is explored or clarification is sought.

We Believe What We Perceive

Our internal process, or how we internally experience or interpret something, is often more about our history as opposed to what the other person may truly mean. The stories we tell ourselves about what the other person means may negatively affect the relationship.

Often we use the word feeling for what is not a feeling. For example, I feel that you are accusing me of lying. It is important to differentiate this thought from the feelings that are triggered by it.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Feelings-Arent-Facts&id=9703527

3 Keys in Being Able to Use the Power of the Mind

When we first get a sense that our minds can have a significant impact on our lives, it is hard to believe. We can get curious about it and read up on it, but there's nothing like seeing proof in our own lives. At that point, we can still be confused about this power which is why we need to learn how to put it into perspective.

First, we need to look for evidence to understand the power of the mind and by making connections with our own experiences. There is certainly a reason behind all this and it is fascinating to search for our own answers. Second, when we apply this principle, we can grow exponentially by changing what's in our minds versus exhausting ourselves at changing our environment. Third, because we live in a universe where everything is connected, there's a proper way to do this.

1. Put a certain section of your life under a scope and look for patterns

We are conditioned to see things happen in our lives at random. However, if we look for a relationship between our personal growth and our experiences, we will start to see an organized purpose. The next step will be to ask questions to why events happened the way they did. Or what if they happened differently?

It may not be obvious at first but as soon as we start asking these questions, we open our minds to get new answers. They will come through insights, not necessarily through the analytical process. It is really important to be patient with this.

What we are really looking for is how the events in our lives are aligned with our state of minds. How were our thoughts, our perspectives, our emotions, our feelings? Well, what we perceive is our minds but everything really is coming from our subconscious minds. Then we may wonder if all our events, if not our reality have been created by the state of our subconscious minds.

2. Instead of working hard to change your environment change your perspectives

Most of us are conditioned to work hard at making the best out of our lives. In doing so, we do our best in taking the necessary steps towards our goals through the time and energy we have available. But at some point, we may feel that there are limitations. No matter what we do, there are things outside our control that block us. Then we are also limited by the time and energy we have, we often wish we had more. There's a way of letting our lives work for us, versus working hard in our lives.

The entire purpose of working hard at achieving our goals is to learn our lessons. However, this is a much slower process than what is available. When we develop the ability to find meaning in our life events, we change our perspectives. Much has to do with changing our beliefs. Understanding this gives us the power to manifest things in our lives much more quickly. In the process, we get deeper in touch with how the universe responds to our subconscious minds. At this point, the real challenge is to get better in letting ourselves take responsibility for our beliefs.

We are conditioned to have pride in what we believe. Our beliefs may have served us during the times we created them, especially if they acted as defense mechanisms. But as our lives change, we can let them go. We mostly forget what they are, until we realize that our lives are a reflection of them. This also means our lives can become reflections of the new perspectives we work on attaining. From here, we get to see evidence that there is a law of attraction. It doesn't mean we have the free will to create whatever perspective we want to get what we think we want. There are universal laws at work.

3. If you want to manifest things, they have to be in alignment with your purpose

Once we learn about the power of changing our perspectives, we will be tempted to manipulate our thoughts to want to manifest new things into our lives. I say manipulate because we could be mistaking our thoughts for our perspectives. We have the free will to change our thoughts, but our perspectives change when we come to deeper understandings derived from our life experiences.

Much of the law of attraction movement was about getting what we wanted based on the thoughts we were putting out. If it worked and was that easy it would be like everyone winning the lottery. What does work is when we remind ourselves of what we really want deep inside. Achieving wealth could be one of our common desires. However, I understand now that there is much maturity that has to be learned first before we can manifest it. Maybe it's part of the divine plan because something needs to change on how we collectively view money. The current model is becoming less and less sustainable.

Manifesting becomes more frequent and powerful as we become more aligned with understanding what perspective we ultimately want to achieve. I would say what we want to achieve is more presence and living in the moment. When doing so we learn to become more in touch with our feelings which results in a much deeper experience of happiness. It also means living less in the ego, but using the ego as service versus it running the show. The reason it is important to see through ego manipulation is because it will take us away from where we ultimately want to be.

Developing an increasingly deeper understanding of the power of the mind can lead us to an incredible journey of self-discovery and happiness. Let's be honest, what we really desire in terms of financial success is financial freedom, not a bunch of material possessions. They are just benefits. The easiest way to get there is to change our perspectives through becoming the best version of ourselves.

http://ezinearticles.com/?3-Keys-in-Being-Able-to-Use-the-Power-of-the-Mind&id=9702495

The Journey of Destiny

Whether you are leaving home, school, college, a job, a relationship or your old life you are making a turn in the path to your destiny. Every change in your path begins with a choice, with the intent to begin or finish something and go forward. Life moves through time with a rhythm of precision, just like the clocks that have defined time since the sundial.

Your journey may seem stalled at times; leaving you feeling like time is moving slowly or standing still even though you know it isn't possible. A closer look at when you felt that way usually reveals a time where there was no clear intent or when you could not see the choices before you. Human nature dictates that you will do nothing when you don't know what to do. It is imperative to move through this state of mind and instill intent back into your game plan.

Most people have no idea how to create intent, the forward movement behind all of their actions. Yet intent is a shift in consciousness that everyone engages in daily. You have been living with and understanding it since the first alarm clock entered your life. Sleeping is a necessary and different state of consciousness. An alarm clock is set with a predetermined time to awaken you; it is a reflection of your intent to shift consciousness, to move into a new more aware state of mind. Most people live with this every day; many live with the internal fight to make that shift... hence the 'sleep button' that allows a few more minutes to stay where you are. You'll never hit the sleep button when you are excited about your new day. Set your alarm!

If you find yourself in a place where you are unsure about the next step to take in your life take a moment to define what your intent really is. You define your dreams with this step. Then hold your dreams closely, embrace them; loosen your hold on the path to achieve them. This allows for all the unseen opportunities that may lie ahead to join you on the path, leading you to a destiny far beyond your original intent.

Allowing new people and ideas to intermingle on your path are the unknown opportunities that expand your vision and enhance your dream. Your destiny is far greater than you can imagine today, if you allow it to be.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Journey-of-Destiny&id=9709776

It's Only Words

Words are power tools in our box of life skills. They can enslave or free us and even set us on fire! That's powerful; when something so innocuous can carry enough force to shape the future of other people it's important to understand how to use them. Sometimes it isn't even the words so much as how you say them; meanings change based on the emphasis behind them. Look at how things change with these two simple words; pret-ty good or pretty good! One implies things could get way better while the other says things are great, yet they are exactly the same words. The meaning behind them is as important as the words themselves.

Words that enslave us tap into inner fears. These are words that are intended to tear us down or make us feel bad about ourselves. They are the bullying words of 'You're stupid, ugly, fat, undesirable... ' they are the words that make adults cringe and run back to the dark to hide from the pain. They are the same words that destroy the foundation of children rendering them incapable of loving themselves or life. These words spring form the darkest part of humanity typically flung at us from someone who feels very threatened by us for no obvious reason.

Words that free us originate from a loving acceptance that encourages us to press on, to believe in ourselves and our dreams. They are the words of hope; they heal, uplift and inspire us. They frequently form a launch pad to greater accomplishments. When words free us they are providing answers and assurances about something we did not understand or doubted. They prompt us to believe in what we felt was truth.

Words that set us on fire touch the deepest parts of our emotions; some fear based inspiring anger and some faith-based. The faith-based affirm something that matters deeply to us, many times generating new ideas that allow us to pursue a dream we have held tightly to. When words inspire creativity or hope they connect with the place where we have faith in the goal. Those that cause fear touch the place where we hide what we believe is deficient in us.

They are all only words; how valuable are they? Consider that communication skills are at the top of the list for those who are charged with making decisions about hiring and granting salary increases and promotions. They are the basis of every summary about who a person was in life, because they defined who they were. It's only words, but they can create so many different conclusions in the lives we touch.

If you are unsure about how you want to say something, decide what effect you want to achieve and then you will know which words to use and how to say them. Your words will determine how you'll be remembered; they become a part of the legacy of your life.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Its-Only-Words&id=9710691

What People Falsely Believe About Destiny

I'm tired of hearing people going on about how they were "meant" for something, and about how something was "meant" to be.

Because...

"Meant" by who or what? And when? And why? Is everyone and everything "meant" for something? Or is it only certain situations? Are the resulting actions thereof also "meant" for something? And the resulting consequences of those actions? Etc.

How many couples head over heels in love with each other would say they're "meant" for each other? How many times have you heard someone say this about their current infatuation?

(Hell, maybe you've even been in a relationship like that.)

... And then a couple of years later they break up after months of deteriorating sex and bickering over mundane problems.

Oops.

It seems it's one of those sayings that doesn't hold up to the simplest of scrutiny or logic. Try doing some basic, reasoned questioning the next time someone talks about someone being "meant" for something.

They're not gonna be able to provide satisfactory answers.

Why do we still seem to entertain the notion that anyone or anything can somehow be "meant" for something?

While I don't know, I'm fairly certain the answer has a couple of components to it...

• It's one of those things that people say without giving it any thought. Such sayings permeate our language. (No one is being literal when they tell someone to "get bent", either.)
• For thousands of years, our ancestors have believed in magic and the idea of an omnipotent creator of everything, often one who made a "divine plan" for us. -- Simply because they didn't know any better.
• It's a deceitfully easy way of looking at the world. Because ultimately it supports the idea that we're not in charge of our lives, and that we don't have responsibility for our actions.

While there are interesting aspects to every point, we can potentially learn the most from the last one. Because it tells us about how we tend to shun responsibility in even the tiniest of ways.

"But that's not what I meant at all!" No, of course not. But from a purely semantic standpoint, it's actually pretty much what you're getting at. Albeit unintentionally.

"But God gave us free will!" Sure. And Apollo could predict the future, and Thor had a magic hammer, and Noah was 950 years old when he died.

Look. If something is predestined for anything beyond the scope of human will and control, it is, by definition, not subject to human influence. However we act towards it becomes futile and meaningless. All considerations about the source of "destiny" aside, if everything is "destiny", it means we're not in charge of our lives.

While I do believe that there's no inherent meaning to anything other than what makes sense to the beholder at any given time, what truly empowers us is the very appointing of said meaning. Acknowledging that there is no meaning but what we appoint to things when we make a decision, take a stand and choose a path for ourselves.

And then, of course, we need to do it. We need to realize that there's no sensible reason to believe that anything beyond our own, inherent human traits and nature somehow "destines" anyone for anything.

We need to realize that we have the ability to be proactive and creative in building our lives; that challenges can always be overcome, and that we need not settle for anything or take anything for granted.

And that very insight is true liberation.

http://ezinearticles.com/?What-People-Falsely-Believe-About-Destiny&id=9684501

This Is How To Let Go Of Being Attached To Situations In Life

"I have no idea of what tomorrow will bring, so I wish to prepare for it."

"You fear tomorrow - not realizing that yesterday is just as dangerous."

The delightful short tale by Anthony de Mello underscores the fact that our attachments to the past can be equally harmful.

We must release our hold of yesterday's concerns and bring our awareness to the present moment, if we desire to seek contentment.

It's a given that most people want to experience happiness and joy. There are many ways to achieve it and while some attain it, others don't. However, it is no less a central desire to seek fulfillment in our everyday life.

We want happiness to fill the cup when pain overflows. Yet the irony is we experience more pain and suffering than joy allows.

We attach our desires to people and situations, holding on tighter than we should. We stress about matters that impose upon our happiness and become discouraged.

Things don't always go as planned. People let us down. The road ahead gets bumpy.

Buddhist author Lama Surya Das writes in The Big Questions: How to Find Your Own Answers to Life's Essential Mysteries: "As Mark Twain said, 'It's not what we don't know that gets us in trouble, but what we are sure we know'. We attach to one or more particular ways of seeing ourselves that, neither accurate nor helpful, entrap us in mind-forged manacles, self-limiting beliefs, and unfulfilling, misdirected behavior patterns and desires. We fall into living as we are not and lose who and what we actually are."

The Art of Detachment

Detachment means to disassociate yourself from intended outcomes. It requires letting go of fixed ideas how life should be.

If you commit yourself to getting what you want, you set yourself up for pain.

For example, if you base your day on your partner's mood or getting the next promotion at work, you allow outward conditions to dictate your feelings. You are trying to control your world instead of trusting the process of life.

"Normally we think we see reality, but what we see is our own subjective perceptions, filtered through all of our associations and desires, as well as through language and conditioning," states author Ezra Bayda in The Authentic Life: Zen Wisdom for Living Free from Complacency and Fear.

Let Go of Attachments

This requires practice, though it is possible to let go of attachments that no longer serve you.

You might ruminate on the past and hold on to things that don't matter anymore. What if you were to enjoy the richness of the present moment instead?

Make it a point to let go of anything that's not for your highest good, especially expectations.

Do you often worry about the future?

Do you base your feelings on whether you are moving forward in life?

Either way, make it a priority to let go of attachments by cherishing the depth of each moment. Move beyond your negative thoughts and allow life to be exactly as it is.

Letting go is grounded in the wakefulness of the present moment being perfect as it is. Whilst you expect things to be a certain way, detachment means to let go of these thoughts.

"When we see through our attachments by fully experiencing them, the result is freedom. When we can see and experience life without the filters of our judgments and demands, the result is appreciation and the quiet joy of being. When we see through our fears, the result is love," states Ezra Bayda.

Let Go of Expectations

Expectations set you up for disappointment. Whilst it's normal to receive respect and love from others, sometimes people don't return the respect or love you deserve. Happiness means acknowledging this, so you avoid hanging your hopes on people fulfilling your emotional needs.

If we are attached to life being a particular way, we are assured of being hurt when things do not follow as expected.

The solution, you ask?

Let go.

Consider psychotherapist David Richo's view in The Five Things We Cannot Change: And the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them: "We cannot take refuge in feeling good, because that cannot be sustained. What is sustained and sustaining is a yes to what is, 'taking the good with the bad'. This can only happen when we have no attachment to how things should be."

Let Go of Outcomes

Do you want to work toward your goals and dreams while letting go of outcomes?

Focus on pursuing what is meaningful and give it your undivided attention. People pursue what they consider will make them happy, yet remain miserable now.

To work towards a prosperous future, flow with the currents of life instead of being on a roller coaster ride of ups and downs.

Steady is the way.

Author Jan Frazier offers the following wisdom in The Freedom of Being: At Ease with What Is: "When you are free, you no longer experience attachment - to the roles you play, to possessions, to ideas, to the outcome of action, to the people you love. You are free of ferocious desire, of the driving 'need' to get (and keep) what you want."

Fulfillment Comes From Within

As much as we want to believe that success and happiness happen 'out there' - it simply isn't true.

Happiness and fulfillment emerge from within.

Ask those who are content what their secret is and many will tell you, they learned to simplify life and let go of attachments.

They loosened their grip and allowed life to serve them. They are grateful for the pleasant and unpleasant moments because both experiences contain the seeds of opportunity for growth.

They are unattached to how life should develop and trust every experience serves their highest good.

Think back to a time you released your attachments to something.

Maybe it was resentment or holding on to a particular point of view. As you let go, you no doubt felt relief and moved on.

That is the significance of letting go. You let go to move forward, instead of dragging the past behind with you.

"When you are unattached, you have inner freedom. You have no investment in a particular outcome, and so you do what is necessary in the moment. You explore every option and are receptive to all new information. You do all that you know to do, and then trust, because you have no attachment to either the result or how the result is produced," affirms authors Charlene Belitz and Meg Lundstrom in The Power of Flow: Practical Ways to Transform Your Life with Meaningful Coincidence.

So, release your hold on tomorrow. Do not blemish the present moment with your attachments of how it should be.

If you are anxious about a particular matter, simply let it go. Drop it as though I were handing you a hot piece of coal.

Keep letting go until you get to a place of nothingness and have released all attachments and suffering.

Only then will you know true peace and joy in its entirety.

http://ezinearticles.com/?This-Is-How-To-Let-Go-Of-Being-Attached-To-Situations-In-Life&id=9711468