A Better Life With Positive Thoughts

Positivity in our ways of living -

In the midst of difficult circumstances when there is hopelessness all around, a single ray of hope can do wonders. It is only experienced by those who believe in its powers. Affirmative thoughts have a tremendous lot of energy associated with it that can sweep away all its negative counterparts. Still, it feels difficult to a bigger populace to attain positive ways of living. Several factors are responsible for this air of negatives or at most, least positives. Under the effects of these powerful & driving factors, people are rendered helpless & therefore, choose to live as a victim. However, it is equally easier to lead a life filled with enthusiasm if fundamentals are taken into account.

Considering the hardships that one faces in his life, circumstances & time seem to be the driving parameters. They thus, form the reason of his sufferings whenever he discusses or shares his life with someone. But, if you search deeper seeking fundamentals with a tilt of perspective, the reasons change. It will be found that you have suffered because you were conquered by the consequences posed to you. And you hadn't done your part in making things better. Things would have turned in a way you want them to be if you had stuck to some values & beliefs of affirmative principles. And, you are living in some condition in the present because you didn't possess positive attributes in your temperament at the time of sufferings. Thus, positivity can have the ability to cause wonders to happen if you believe that it will. If you give your energy of thoughts to adhere to such beliefs aligned to your particular life. Miracles will happen & you will experience them in your life if you have the roots of your belief system nourished with supportive values. No hardships would then disturb you, but look as if they are the doors of transformation of your life that only demands a little extra effort from your side to check if you deserve the rewards that are there for you.

Similarly, your achievements can be nourished with optimistic beliefs. If you desire for something to exist in your life for which you can use your strength & abilities to the fullest, think about it positively. Don't get carried away with obstacles. Repeat inspiring statements to provoke yourself & don't get suppressed by the opposition you receive.

So, be positive & lead your life as a conqueror & not as a victim.

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What Psychologists Have to Say About the Science of Positive Thinking

Thinking one's way to success is an art that any individual can practice but only if they knew how. Hear out what psychologists have to say.

1. Richard Boyatzis:

Simple physical and mental exercises are capable of engaging a person's parasympathetic nervous system which is the anatomical part responsible for slowing the heart rate due to relaxation. As a result, a renewed optimism is attained thus leading to a better working relationship. A professor in psychology and cognitive science at the Case Western Reserve University, Boyatzis attests that engaging these parasympathetic systems via regular leisure and physical activities has proven to be recipes for stoking compassion together with creativity.

He proceeds to state that strain together with stress leads an individual to be emotionally, cognitively and ultimately perceptual impairment. He further goes ahead to say that a person who is stressed at their work place will never be capable of thinking outside the box. The reason is clear; they can't see the box in the first place.

Chronic stress is a hindrance for professionals together with those in leadership responsibilities to perform optimally. Prof. Richard argues that stress is an important aspect in our lives and it's the one that makes us to function. However, when the stress ends up being chronic, the body will always make good use of its defensive mechanism and that's to close down thus stopping the mind from functioning well.

2. Sarah Lewis, psychologist of a chartered organization.

According to a report by Lewis, bad management together with workplace bullying ends up being some of the best recipes for a damaged mental and physical health on both sides of the bullying activities.

This therefore implies that if a person in a leadership position is suffering from chronic stress or is fond of bullying, the entire organization will never think outside the box thus it will fail to achieve its optimum potential. In addition, the effects may be channeled back to the children at home thus killing a whole generation as far as positivity is concerned.

Is it possible for positivity together with happiness to result into success?

There has always been a notion that success has always and will always lead to happiness. This is never true as the inverse is the only true fact about the subject. No matter how successful you are financially, if you don't like what you are doing, you will never be happy. On the contra wise, as long as you are happy in your field of interest, you will always want to do your best to achieve something within this area thus leading you to a success. It is happiness that results in to success but not vice versa.

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Persisting Through Resistance

The story of Nelson Mandela's fight for freedom is a great example of the quality of persistence. Born on the 18 July 1918 in Mvezo, a small village in South Africa to Nonqaphi Noskeni and Nkosi Mandela, he was originally named Rolihlahla Mandela.

Nelson Mandela took keen interest in the apartheid rule dominant in South Africa upon hearing his elders recount stories of his ancestors' bravery during the wars of resistance. He was determined to contribute to the liberation of his people. The years that followed saw him sacrifice more than twenty-seven years, fighting relentlessly for racial equality in South Africa. Although the journey was full of bumps - betrayals, defeat, trials and even convictions, his efforts finally paid off, as generations to come will still feel the impact of his legacy.

Now, while striving towards building a global business, a career or fighting a cause, throughout your journey there will be resistance, sometimes from external sources and at other times from internal sources. This could appear in form of fear, defeat or low self-esteem. How do you persist through them? Here are three suggestions to guide you.

Set your eyes on the prize

The prize is synonymous with the motivations for your aspirations. Simply put, what do you stand to gain after you have attained that goal? All Nelson Mandela wanted was for racial discrimination to end in South Africa. This quote from his Dock speech at the Rivonia trial of 1964 provides insight into his motivation.

"I have fought against white domination and I have fought against black domination. I have cherished the ideal of a democratic and free society in which all persons live together in harmony and equal opportunities. It's an ideal which I hope to live for and to achieve. But if needs be, it's an ideal for which I am prepared to die."

Setting your eyes on the prize helps you to endure and also propels you to go the extra mile in your endeavors.

Learn from your mistakes

You will make a lot of mistakes along the way, but a mindset that failure is part of the process will help you move forward. Hence, focus more on learning from them and moving on quickly, and remaining resolute. The Harvard Business Review recommends that business leaders should study causes when analysing a failure event. They should create an environment that counteracts the blame game and encourages employees to feel more comfortable with learning from their failures. The result of this, in the long term, is strong controls and secured processes.

Shut out Negativity

Psychologists agree that people are likely to remember unpleasant memories than they will pleasant ones. It is OK to agree that you are not getting your expected results if that's your reality. You can always review your methods and devise new strategies to meet your goals. Look out for constructive criticisms and try to resist the urge to dwell on the negativities.

Your focus should be on the goal at all times. Whenever you are stuck, remember the popular Nelson Mandela quote: "It always seems impossible until it's done."

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How to Maintain a Positive Attitude To Be Happier

1. Have a Daily Routine. The way you start your day matters a lot. Ensure that you have a daily routine that puts you in a good mood so you can start your day off right.

2. Carry an Attitude of Happiness With You. Instead of waiting for external things that make you happy, be happy and then see how that affects things that happen around you. That is, instead of telling yourself that the first good something has to happen, and then you will be happy, be happy first. It will make you develop a positive attitude.

3. Smiling Gives You The Power Of Positive Thoughts. Try to smile for a minute while you think about a happy memory or the last thing that made you smile. The body releases endorphins and serotonin, also known as the healthy hormones when you smile. It is much easier to feel the life when chemicals that are released by your body are conducive to your well-being.

4. Think positively. Read books with positive thoughts, listen to music with uplifting lyrics, and watch movies where that will make you have positive thoughts. You can change your negative attitude by uploading as much positivity in your brain as you possibly can.

5. Take Responsibility. At any time, your positive attitude can be a victim or a creator. The first step you should take is to take responsibility.

6. Be proactive. An active person develops to recognize social skills because he or she allows external events or others to influence how they feel. An active person decides how they will feel no matter what they may be passing through. Be proactive by choosing your attitude and managing it throughout the day.

7. Change your Thoughts. When you change your thoughts, you will develop a more positive attitude, while negative attitude leads to negative thoughts. Changing your attitude is easy on what you are thinking and choosing to think differently.

8. Have a Purpose. Creating purpose in life gives you a positive thought, so you can stand firm in the midst of the vicissitudes and challenges of life. It brings purpose and meaning to your life, if you know your purpose, it will go a long way in your nice personality development.

9. Concentrate on the Good Things. To have a positive attitude, concentrate on the good. Concentrate on the good in yourself, the good in others, and the good in your life.

10. Stop Thinking that Life is Easy. The truth is that life is not easy sometimes. It may even be painful. But if you develop positive thoughts you can take it. We know that sometimes things will not be easy, and thoughts toward good things that would make you adapt to it and believe that things will be better

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How Do You Cope in a Crisis?

There are times when we may feel world-weary, overwhelmed and jaded. Something has gone wrong, or perhaps yet another crisis has occurred in our lives. It may be as a result of one specific incident, life has thrown us a curved ball. Or there may have been a sequence of disasters and now the final straw, something seemingly minor has landed and our resilience has folded.

How is it that some people seem able to take crises and testing times in their stride, whilst others really struggle to cope?

- There are people whose mindset always seems to anticipate setbacks and disaster. They can seem overly enthusiastic about catastrophizing situations, looking at the potential for rejection and misfortune with their 'what if' or shocked 'that could have happened' attitude. They speculate about things that haven't happened, the 'what if he'd fallen and broken his arm', or 'what if she'd let your secret out of the bag?' This mindset predisposes them to negativity, panic and a desire to be over-cautious, even though caution's not always the most helpful or effective approach.

- Having a more relaxed approach to life can mean that if something bad does happen or a situation doesn't work out as planned it doesn't have to spell crisis and failure. In fact, people who have a more positive, receptive approach to life and the difficulties they encounter are often more upbeat and not as easily deterred. They usually have a positive outlook and see beyond any immediate problems to find alternative ways of resolving things.

Setbacks, viewed from a different perspective, can reveal interesting options and may in part result in important lessons, insights and new opportunities. But we have to be receptive to the signs. When something doesn't work out as we'd hoped it may be that another unexpected door can be opened. I've certainly found that some of my 'great' ideas that crashed ultimately resulted in outcomes that I'd never have anticipated at the outset. But there had to be a preparedness to discuss and negotiate in order to reach that resolution.

- Remove 'I should, I ought, I must' from your mindset. The pressure of other people's hopes, expectations and disappointment can turn a setback into a crisis and seriously affect your ability to think clearly and move forward. Think through what's right for you, be clear about your own talents, abilities and interests and remember that successful people often work long hours and deal with setbacks because they are motivated and enthusiastic about their goal. Working to someone's agenda rarely carries the same passion.

- Crises can provide the people in your life with the previously unconsidered opportunity to step up and demonstrate their potential. Family, friends and perhaps even business colleagues may offer a valuable supply of strength, understanding and support when crises happen or things go wrong. Be big enough to share the load with them, they're your 'team'. Do them the courtesy of letting them in on your struggles and be prepared to accept their help when they are there for you. They often appreciate being included, and may be able to suggest some great ideas!

- Breaking down a crisis into 'bite-sized' chunks can be a useful approach. Then you can discover that it's unlikely that every aspect will be equally troublesome. By taking a step back from an 'insurmountable' problem it's often possible to scrutinize the various parts that combine to make it so serious and list each specific, individual element.

I find that there are often five 'chunks' to a serious problem. Chunk one, what you can deal with now; two, the part you need to do some work on before having to pass it on to someone else for their input; three, what's already in hand and being dealt with, four; what is finished with and can immediately be passed over to others; five, what you can do nothing about. Let go of what you can do nothing about and determine the best order to start dealing with the other matters that you can influence.

When you apply this calmer approach you may discover that you're less overwhelmed than you initially thought. This enables you to then start resolving parts of your crisis, reduce its intensity and so regain some semblance of control.

- In any crisis situation it's important to look after yourself too. Be committed to regular sleep times, eat as well as you can, stay clear of drowning your sorrows in booze, sugar binges or worse. Turn off your technology each evening and allow yourself some quiet time, as well as time for fun, friends and exercise.

Be genuinely interested in other people and what is going on in the outside world, away from yourself and your situation. These healthy distractions can stop you from becoming too self-absorbed and introspective and so become better able to cope in a crisis.

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How To Ride The Wave Of A Positive Thought

What were you thinking a moment ago?

Was it positive, uplifting or disempowering?

Notice your feelings generated by the thoughts.

Are they pleasant, neutral or disagreeable?

If you're able to move your attention to your emotions, congratulations, you know how to ride the wave of a positive thought.

What do I mean by that?

If you observe a surfer on a wave, you'll notice it will turn into a large swell at one point. With enough momentum it surges into a larger wave, carrying the surfer to the shoreline.

Thoughts come and go from the landscape of your mind like ocean waves. New thoughts enter your stream of consciousness every one second. This means thoughts don't last, unless you direct your attention towards specific ones.

We live in the feelings of our thoughts, not the outside circumstances that influence them. External conditions do not impose upon your thinking, however it can produce an emotional response if the stimuli is strong enough.

"Truth is: Getting stopped by a thought, negative or positive, lays the groundwork for any disconcerting experience. It's never what we think, but that we think that gets us into hot water," affirms sports psychologist Garret Kramer in, The Path of No Resistance: Why Overcoming is Simpler than You Think.

Some days a thought produces a negative emotion while other days it's insignificant.

Why?

What has changed apart from the day?

We react to our surroundings on those occasions for unknown reasons, i.e. tired, moody, hungry, etc. At that time we're ruled by our thinking more so.

Your mind doesn't differentiate between a positive or negative thought. It doesn't register them in this manner - but you do, as the observer. When we label thoughts, we assign them importance over others, so they occupy space in our minds.

I want to be clear: You are not your thoughts.

You are not your thoughts, because they appear and dissolve from your mind and none are permanent. They may be repeated often, but they are never permanent. To imply you are what you think is misleading, to the degree you might experience a positive thought one moment and a negative one the next. If you are defined by that distinction, who are you according to this narrative?

If we live in the feelings of our thoughts and experience an anxious thought, it doesn't imply you're an anxious person. It means you experienced a thought which produced anxiety in your body. You may have an illuminating thought the next moment which cancels the earlier one. There are exceptions of course, governed by a clinical diagnosis by a trained mental health professional.

So the question arises, who are you then?

Garret Kramer affirms once more, "All you really need to do is leave your thoughts alone. Why? Because when left alone, as we've seen, all thoughts are impotent. You're free to excel no matter when or where a negative, or even a positive, thought invades your brain."

The key to overcome unwelcomed thoughts is not to eject them from your mind, but to be mindful of them. Approximately 50,000 - 70,000 thoughts pass through your mind every day. Thoughts flood into your consciousness on a moment-to-moment basis, like a TV show streamed online.

If thoughts flow into our consciousness, how can we reduce the impact of the negative ones?

By being mindful of disempowering thoughts, you bring them to the forefront of your mind and become conscious, rather than unconscious of them.

Unconscious thoughts are part of the landscape of our minds. Similar to streaming a TV show on a computer, you can be distracted by a pop-up window selling you a product or service. Your intention is to view the show, yet the distraction pulls you away from it. Unconscious thoughts have the same effect. They emerge from nowhere and can lead us to dark places if we're unaware.

"The pain that you create now is always some form of nonacceptance, some form of

unconscious resistance to what is. On the level of thought, the resistance is some form of

judgment. On the emotional level, it is some form of negativity. The intensity of the pain depends on the degree of resistance to the present moment, and this in turn depends on how strongly you are identified with your mind," states author Eckhart Tolle.

The key is to recognise our unconscious thoughts without invoking negative feelings or adding a narrative. We do so by witnessing them through the eyes of equanimity, instead of reacting with negative emotions or actions.

To ride the wave of positive thought, first note the feelings produced in your body. Note your emotional response without becoming invested in them.

Eckhart Tolle states, "Emotion arises at the place where mind and body meet. It is the body's reaction to your mind - or you might say, a reflection of your mind in the body."

Empowering thoughts have an enriching quality, demonstrating they are in harmony and balance. Thoughts that produce an uncomfortable sensation, is your body's way of showing you they are out of alignment.

In this setting, the body is a feedback instrument informing you of your thinking.

You needn't be attentive to every thought. Yet, if you're aware how those thoughts generate positive or negative emotions, it's possible to choose more balanced thoughts.

When an inspiring thought emerges, move into your body and notice your emotional response.

Is it in your chest, stomach or elsewhere?

How does it feel?

Is it a tingling sensation that radiates or does it move to other regions?

Meditation is useful when sitting with your thoughts in a quiet setting. Even as little as five minutes in silence helps you become acquainted with your thoughts, instead of passing through your mind without conscious awareness.

To ride the wave of a positive thought, note the feelings they produce while shifting your awareness to them.

As you witness your thoughts, your awareness observes them thus diminishing their intensity.

In time, you create longer streams of positive thoughts, having become familiar with their ebb and flow.

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Do You Appreciate The Little Things Everyday?

For the past year, I kept a gratitude journal and whenever life takes a hit on a bump in the roads I've paved, I look back and re-read some of the entries I have made inside and it feels like someone else secretly wrote my experience down in my place.

That's because it is so easy to forget small moments of gratitude more than anything else.

Funny thing is, why are we able to bear grudges and hold certain amounts of resentment for someone or circumstances over really long periods of time and allow it recur in our minds over and over so easily?

Your brain overrides every single good thing in your life in that instant, like a malfunctioning CPU system that took a hit on a virus and starts a raging war within. It becomes a battle you feel the need to fight and resist every day.

And if you actually keep a diary and have your worst nightmares documented in gruesome details, it'll probably continue to stay in your life and stick around in your experience with you starring as the main lead in the horror movie of your life.

(Well, at least up to the point & moment you burn those journals.)

Gratitude, on the other hand is such a gradual and subtle process in the beginning that it is so easy to overlook and miss, it's almost as if you turn away for a split second and that opportunity slips right through your fingers.

The thing about gratitude is, you need to first of all learn appreciation.

Without the "ability" to appreciate, you wouldn't even begin to know where to start to find the feeling of gratefulness. You start with the things you already have and then begin to appreciate the unfolding of the things you don't have but know is coming and on its way.

Being able to direct your thoughts is the wonderful start of having control of your life, to have the freedom to think your thoughts with deliberate intent and choose what you would like to be feeling in that moment and not have to constantly look to someone else's behavior and action to feel good.

Taking the time to practice feeling appreciation is merely a tool to help sculpt yourself a better stronger mind. There may not be huge explosive great things happening every single day to be jumping and punching the air for joy, but there are always things around you to appreciate in this instant right here and now.

That is the beauty of this practice.

Sometimes it takes something big to happen before it grabs your focus and attention making you learn to appreciate things the hard way, but it really doesn't have to be this way.

You can start anytime and any day.

A healthy person wouldn't start appreciating their ability to breathe with ease until they lose it one day or they wouldn't appreciate the ability to feel hungry to taste & savor food until their appetite was taken away from a dis-ease or illness.

We take for granted the smallest things around us every day.

If we take the time and a little effort to find 1 more thing to add to our list and let it grow, soon enough, it becomes second nature to you.

Soon enough, you will truly take possession and ownership of a new found appreciation for yourself, for the people around you, for all the things that were invented to make you go through your daily activities with ease and comfort.

You will appreciate your ability to listen to soothing music and wonderful conversations, your ability to feel the warm running water soaking through your skin and hug your favorite Egyptian cotton pillow, the ability to see every sunrise in the morning & catch the sun setting in the evenings when you are out on your walks, the ability to smell food coming out from the kitchen and your fridge to be surprised and delighted, the ability to taste what's sitting on your plate to nourish your body and mind that day.

Here are some simple (but not easy at first) methods/ways to start practicing for your well-being:

1) Keep a Gratitude Journal

Start with just 3 things a day and gradually increase it to 5, then 10 and so on so forth.

But 3 is a good start.

2) Express your gratitude

Take the time to really recount on the specific positive feeling of the things you felt grateful for etc, were you excited? Hopeful? Delighted? Inspired?

Learn to increase your A-Z vocabulary of positive feelings and words and you'll soon find that your conversations, sentences you construct and attitude makes a shift etc, A for Appreciation.. B for Beautiful.. C for Carefree.. D for Delight...

3) Self-direct your thoughts & be the architect of your own mind

When something "bad" happens, always be quick to nit-pick for positive aspects. Say, someone was unkind to you that day, you would soothe yourself to find reasons to love them anyway. etc, maybe the person had a bad day, be thankful you are having a much better one and slowly you redirect your focus back to yourself and not let other people's issues or problems be the reason for your bad day.

4) Practice it everyday

Find every possible chance to practice the feeling of it. Whether it's the water you drink that quenched your thirst, the food you bless before your meals, the efficient people you work around with, the kind people you meet on the streets, use it as a tool and shine a spotlight on it.

Put a magnifying glass over every small detail and soon enough, you acclimate to the high feeling energy place and the state of mind of pure appreciation.

When your body & mind dominates the constant feeling of gratitude, nothing else that contradicts it will ever come near your experience.

Basically, we are like walking giant magnets of energy.

What we put out there for the world to receive, we get hit back (hard) with the same one. What goes around comes around, remember? What it is really referring to is not karma. Even though it might feel like it is there and then, if it was a negative bounce.

It has always been about your personal energy you carry with you 24/7. That "vibe" people give off? That's energy. You can't see it, but you can absolutely feel it.

So would you be more careful with what you hold in your thoughts if you knew this law? As sure as the law of gravity, this attraction exists and it is happening all the time even if you can't see it with your naked eye. So make small effort to shift that energy if you want only to engage with the best. And let the respective islands group itself accordingly to energy.

Be a force to be reckoned with & spread only the things you would want to have on your plate and in your life.

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