How to Build Happiness And Self-Esteem Within Children



According to a well-known saying by Carol Hillman, one of the most important things we as adults can do for young children is to replicate the kind of person we would like them to be. It is also a well-known fact that children learn what they live. Ask any number of child psychiatrists and they will be able to corroborate this.

Too many parents and guardians think that young children, do not know what is going on around them at home. Anger and negativity are not beyond their understanding. Some younger children may not understand all the words, but they are quite familiar with the underlying emotions. They are often in a better position to even feel those emotions.

Negativity that emanates from one adult to another is bad enough, but when that negative emotion is directed at children, it can be particularly devastating and harmful. Young children want so much to please their parents and within this quest, they want and need acceptance, love, and understanding.

A study that was made sometime in the recent past, show that at home, parents used on average about eighteen negative statements for every positive one. These are unfortunately and largely directed at their children, which can add up to even more shocking statements in one day. Young children scare easily and just a seemingly tough tone, a sharp reprimand, or an exasperated glance, will do it.

Little signs of rejection, cut very deeply, and the moment you begin to change your attitude from being sullen to that of happiness, you will undoubtedly notice an immediate change in the attitude of the child. There is no doubt that when children are around calm, happy, positive adults, they tend to blossom in many aspects. It is therefore possible to influence others with your attitudes and this is most pertinent when it comes to your child.

The Law of Attraction also makes inference to the phenomena where displaying positive and happy feelings when interacting with your child, is picked up by them very quickly, after which they will respond in kind. Like always attracts like, and a child can easily pick up on your bad mood, your unhappiness, and your negativity, and respond just as quickly.

A word of warning on this point is that children cannot be fooled with false attitudes. You can't pretend to be positive and upbeat. They do know the difference and if it is not genuine, they will know. Children despise being to be lied to, so if you want to instill in them a positive outlook towards life, they have to see and experience the very same example from you. The premise is not only built on examples only, as they seek consistency and have to live it every day. It has to be a part of their daily life and they need to breathe it in from all around them, on a constant basis. It must become a habit with you, in order to translate into a habit with them.

Of equal importance is their sense of absolute values. It is imperative for them to learn to value themselves and others for who they are, and not for the worldly things that they possess. It does not even matter how many treats you give your children to enjoy, because ultimately it is their behavior towards others that really count.

Children must learn to judge other people for what's inside them, and not on how they look, where they live, or what they own. This is of course not something that comes easy, but requires training over an extended period for them to learn some of the most important lessons of life. Our world is sometimes ruled via status symbols, which negatively impacts on the principles that underlie the teaching of these values.

There is usually a lot of societal competition both in the media and in the schools. It is therefore up to you, as a parent, to instill good values in your children, and that starts with you fulfilling the role of an authentic role model.


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