How To Fall Asleep When Your Mind Won't Shut Off

Do you ever lie awake in bed, wanting to sleep, but your mind just won’t shut off?
That was me for about seven years. I got five hours of sleep a night — if I was lucky. Sometimes it felt like I didn't sleep a wink! This was the case until I saw a medicine man in Bali. He finally gave me a tip about how to get about seven hours of sleep a night. It's bliss, and I've added a few extra techniques of my own that will help you reach a sweet, peaceful slumber.
If you can't sleep, don’t get frustrated; get smart. Ask yourself: Why can’t I sleep? Here are a few questions that will help you arrive at the answer:
Were you racing around all day and haven’t had a moment of down time?
Your mind needs time to process the day and relax before you hit the hay.
Try this: Build in one hour of down time with no technology before you go to sleep. Develop a ritual that you enjoy. Read a book, spend time with loved ones, straighten up or prepare for the next day.
Did you have caffeine or an energy drink in the afternoon?
If you're reading this at 2am, drink water to flush your body and have something that makes you sleepy. For some, this is dairy or bread. Chicken, which has tryptophan, can also make you sleepy. In the future, try not having caffeine or energy drinks after 11 am, or skip them all together
Are you stressed about all you have to do tomorrow?
Try this: Keep a pad of paper by your bed and write out a list of everything that needs to be done. Put it in order of importance and plan it out over the week. This will set your mind at ease so you can sleep.
Is your mind is going over a situation, trying to figure out a solution?
Try this: Whatever it is, you can’t do anything about it in the middle of the night. If you're trying to prepare for a conversation or an event, it will always go differently than you expect. The best thing you can do is be present and open, and for that, you need your sleep. If you're trying to understand the past, remember that you can’t change it. All you can do is accept it. So let it go. Let it float out of your mind.
Are you feeling anxious?
Do a gratitude list. Write out five things you're grateful for each night before you turn out the lights. This also creates a more peaceful slumber and great dreams.
Are you so excited about your life that you can’t sleep?
This is what happens to me most these days. Try getting up and doing something grounding and a bit boring. Read a book, organize something or do your finances. That should do it.

14 Things Pressure-less People Do (and You Can, Too)

I’ve studied how pressure affects performance, and the best way to manage it, for more than 20 years. I've interviewed elite athletes, Navy SEALs, entrepreneurs, ER doctors and nurses, hedge fund managers, air traffic controllers, and others who perform their best in pressure moments more often than not. These individuals do not "rise to the occasion," as conventional thinking instructs; rather they do their best by depressurizing—lessening the pressure of the moment. 
Here are 14 things these pressure-less people do to optimize performance:
1. They apply a positive mindset
Pressure-less individuals perceive their pressure moments—situations in which they have something at stake and the outcome is dependent on their performance—using words like opportunity, challenge, and fun. This allows them to approach the moment with confidence instead of trepidation.
2. They believe they get second chances.
Pressure-less people believe that no matter how important the presentation, sales call, audition, game or match, other opportunities will come their way. Because they believe this, they can relax and avoid "do or die" thinking that intensifies pressure feelings.
3. They are control freaks
Pressure-less people stay focused on what they can control in the moment. This allows them to avoid distracting and worrisome thoughts that distort their thinking and disrupt their performance.
4. They practice a mindset of excellence
Pressure-less people realize it heightens pressure to always try to be Number One or to beat the competition. They know it is unrealistic to think you can always be Top Dog. Instead, their mindset is to focus on developing their own excellence. Being their personal best is more important than beating others, so competitive pressures are lessened.
5. They use positive imagination
Pressure-less individuals consciously imagine themselves in all sorts of successful situations. Scoring a winning touchdown, being a Hollywood star, curing cancer, contributing to world peace—these might border on fantasy but they serve the function of creating positive feelings and emotions, like confidence and enthusiasm, two enemies of pressure.
6. They share pressure feelings
To make sure they don’t burst from pressure, pressure-less people disclose their feelings of pressure with others. They have learned, unlike those that bottle up their feelings, that sharing stressful feelings helps alleviate them and, more often than not, helps generate solutions to tackle the pressures they are facing.
7. They avoid distraction.
Whether it’s taking a test, interviewing for a job, making a putt, or making a critical decision, pressure-less people stay focused on the task. Rather than become anxious about the outcome of a negative performance, they stay in the moment so their memory, attention, and judgment are not comprised. They do this in a variety of ways, such as tuning into their senses and remembering that their mission is to do their best. 
8. They walk like a champ
Pressure-less people already know what science now touts as neurological fact: Your posture and gait affect how you feel. Pressure-less people have some Marine in them—they stand up straight and walk with a confident swagger.
9. They celebrate micro successes
Pressure-less people boost their confidence by recognizing their small successes and by doing so, fuel their enthusiasm and belief that they will accomplish their goal—two factors that reduce feelings of pressure and keep them motivated. They implement this strategy by being process-oriented, not outcome oriented. For example, according to their logic, a success is a good interview; continually having good interviews will eventually land a job. 
10. They regulate their arousal
Pressure-less people keep themselves calm so they never panic in a pressure moment, not even when an unexpected glitch occurs. Consciously tuning to their breathing in the moment and practicing disciplines such as relaxation training, yoga, and meditation on a weekly—if not daily—basis provides them with the skill of keeping their heart from zooming and butterflies out of their stomach.
11. They prepare for the worse.
Pressure-less people can think on their feet because they are in the habit of anticipating possible glitches that might occur. They solve these glitches before they arise and mentally rehearse scenarios to practice their execution, paying particular attention to the consequences of their response and how they will continue to respond. If and when the glitch occurs, the pressure-less person still feels in control and is able to attend to task completion.
12. They flashback their successes. 
Pressure-less people experience less pressure because they know they have been successful in similar situations. In a pressure moment, they frequently flashback on a specific time they performed well under pressure. That visual image, and the positive thoughts it evokes, surges confidence within them and relaxes them, too. 
13. They affirm their worth
Pressure-less people experience less pressure because they feel they have value even if they fail in the moment. This feeling prevents them from being “overly attached” to the outcome—a pressure intensifier. Pressure-less people frequently remind themselves of their positive attributes that are independent of their job. Doing so prevents them from defining their worth in how they perform. Pressure-less people frequently remind their children that they are great kids and that they are proud of them independent of how well they perform in school or other activities. Their kids feel less pressure, too.
14. They march to their own beat.
Pressure-less people use their own values and interests to navigate their lives. They are more concerned with living up to their own expectations and following their own dreams than trying to please others, a source of pressure for most.

Affirmations for Abundance

The world tries to tell you that financial wealth is the same thing as abundance and you may believe this is accurate. Abundance is more than monetary, it is the embodiment of all that is good. An abundant person has plenty. Plenty of love, plentfiful shelter, plentiful food, plentiful family, and more. Let's replace the word plenty/plentiful with abundance to put it into perspective.
An abundant person has an abundance of love, an abundance of shelter, an abundance of good, and abundance of family and more.
Affirmations are the things that you communicate to yourself in order to help you to move from where you are now to where you want to be. There is a reason behind this and the reason is simple.
If you think that you can't do it, you can't do it.
Why is that?
First, let me start by saying, that what you believe about yourself is what other people believe about you as well. It is not a coincidence that when you feel terrible one day, you discover that people treat you terribly. In order to change this, you have to start from within.
This sounds easy, yet, it is something that people have struggled with since the beginning.
In this article we are going to look at some possible affirmations for abundance that you can use starting today to change the way that you see yourself and the way you see your ability to create abundance in your life.
Affirmation #1
"I am special. I attract abundance into my life."
Affirmation #2
"I am a good person and abundance flows easily to me. Money is drawn to me."
Affirmation #3
"Abundance is within reach. I am an abundant person. Wealth flows easily to me."
Affirmation #4
"Wealth, love, relationships, and confidence are an everyday part of my life. I am thankful for this abundance."
Affirmation #5
"I am thankful for the abundance that I have received. I am thankful for... (list 3 things you are thankful for)... "
Are you starting to see the power of affirmations? Create your own affirmations or feel free to use the one's listed to get you started. As you begin to find yourself growing in your own personal abundance remember to reflect on this affirmations. Remind yourself how fortunate you are for all that you have received and for all that is waiting for you to receive it.
In time you will discover that the things that you desire will be drawn to you and you to them. Give back and continue to be thankful for everything that you receive. Most importantly, always remember that you are worthy of abundance.


5 Things You Can Do Right Now To Boost Self-Confidence


Boosting your self-confidence doesn't happen overnight. It takes a lot of practice, getting comfortable with rejections, being self-assured and mostly doing the right things that you feel good about. For a shy person, this isn't an easy task, it could take weeks or months to get into the habit of feeling confident about yourself, that's if you even try. Sadly, most people with low self-esteem wouldn't even try at all because of fear.
Good thing that there is a way to start building your self-confidence now. It doesn't take up much of your time nor should you fear any kind of rejection, you could literally do this right now and when you get into the habit of doing it daily, you're going to feel more confident than ever.
1. Stand tall
Fix your posture by rolling your shoulders back and down, pushing your chest out. Make sure your head is in line with your spine instead of forward like a rooster. Not only does this make you seem taller, you also portray a more confident and powerful image; Interestingly, it makes you feel one too.
2. Speak louder
When your voice is unheard, it feels as if you're powerless and no one listens to what you have to say. Easy fix, speak louder. Try to use more diaphragm than larynx when speaking, singers do this when singing a song, it gives them more power with their voice.
3. Speak with conviction
Comes with No. 2, when you speak, you have to be sure about what you said. Never in doubt, otherwise you come off as incompetent and uncertain. Speaking with conviction means that every word that comes out of your mouth, whether an opinion, truth or unproven, you firmly believe without a doubt that what you said was right.
4. Don't be sorry
Sometimes you'll be wrong, whether it was under circumstances or you have to apologize for a mistake. You need to stand firm with what you've said and done instead of sorry. What do I mean by this?
During a party, a friend of mine thought this guy who was talking to her was cute. The next day, this same guy apologizes to her and says "sorry about the things I said last night, I was high." That ultimately ruined his chances with this cute girl. Just like No. 3, when you say it, you have to mean it.
5. Walk as if you're the sexiest thing on Earth
Pick the sexiest song you like, put your headphones on and play it while walking. Notice that your stride is going to be a little different than usual, it gives you a little bit more swagger as you walk through the rhythm. Later on, even without music, you'll be carrying this swagger with you.







Self-Worth: Why Not Make Yourself A Priority?

When is the last time you did something nice for yourself? Has it been months, possibly years? In order for you to love others, you must first love yourself. A way to increase your self-worth is to make yourself a priority. This may seem foreign to some women. Many of us have been taught to put everyone else's needs before ours. We were taught certain beliefs in our childhoods that we have carried with us into adulthood. Without realizing it, these beliefs have shaped our behaviors as adults. We picked up on certain things and learned certain things based on who we grew up around and what we were exposed to. For example, if you grew up seeing your mother fix everyone's plate first and she always ate last, then you may have grown up to believe that you are always supposed to eat last. I'm not saying whether that is right or wrong, it was just an example to show how our beliefs affect us. Whatever we were taught is what we have come to believe and it shows up in our lives. If you did not grow up seeing or having examples of women loving themselves and taking care of themselves, then you probably don't do that. Try to become aware of why you don't or have not made yourself a priority. Having some understanding of whom or what may have helped create your beliefs positively impacts you.
Self-love is an absolute must. Putting yourself first is good for you and everyone around you. The better you feel, the better your energy. That good energy spreads to other areas of your life. It's never too late to make a change. What brings you joy? What makes you feel good inside? Do you have a hobby that you always enjoyed but put on the backburner? Think about the things that make you smile or that get you excited just thinking about them. It could be anything. For some women, it may be dancing. For some, it may be painting. For some, it may simply be reading a good book. Whatever it is for you, try to get back to that in some way. Take time out for yourself. Give more to yourself. When you're happy on the inside, it radiates on the outside. Putting your energy into something that you really like, love or feel good about makes you feel good. When you feel good, you are more confident. There's nothing like a confident woman who knows her self-worth.
Today's women are doing it all. We all get caught up in our busy lives but we deserve time to ourselves. We deserve time to unwind and do something to rejuvenate ourselves. Whether it's going to the spa, getting your hair done, a massage, etc., the point is to do whatever makes you feel good. Love yourself. Even just dedicating an hour of quiet time to yourself could be how you give to yourself. There is nothing wrong with loving yourself and making yourself a priority. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty for taking care of yourself. You deserve that.

The 7 Secrets Of Happy Couples


Do you notice happy couples around you and wonder how they continue to have fun together year after year? Of course, appearances aren't everything — and there's often more to relationships than meets the eye.
That said, there are certain couples who have a palpable level of trust and respect for one another that makes it harder for us to imagine them fighting about the silly stuff that most of us get into.
So ... What are they doing to maintain this high level of connection?
Well, the truth is that most, if not all, couples have their differences. They fight and have moments in which they are deeply frustrated with one another. And there are times when even the happiest couples look just like unhappy couples!
However, there are some important distinctions between happy and unhappy couples. Basically, happy couples know how to fight fairly and how to continue to strengthen their bond.
With practice, we can all develop the following skills that fortify relationships:
1. Happy couples trust each other.
Even when happy couples disagree they trust their partner to be kind, faithful, honest — to care and to have their best interests at heart.
Researcher John Gottman found that couples who trust each other live healthier and longer lives. He found that trust is related to the release of oxytocin, which is the feel good, “bonding” hormone. It’s the same hormone secreted when we have an orgasm — and the stronger the orgasm, the more oxytocin we secrete.
Happy couples tune into one another and step up when the other is in need. When disagreements arise, they default to trusting and forgiving rather than doubting and begrudging.
2. Happy couples don’t despair about their differences.
They know that their differences exist — and sometimes these differences are quite dramatic. Every couple has their ongoing clashes in which their personalities and preferences collide. They notice, ”There it is again — that dance that we do when you do what you do and I do what I do.” But noticing and judging are very different.
Gottman’s research reveals that most marital conflicts are unresolvable. But this doesn't necessarily mean despair. It all comes down to perspective.
Happy couples duke it out fairly knowing that, even with an unresolvable conflict, they are in it for the long haul. They can tolerate the feelings that arise from a dispute and may even accept or laugh about their differences.
3. Happy couples are kind.
They know that their words and behaviors count. Arguments are not a free-for-all. They take care about the words they choose to express frustration and disappointment.
The intention in their communication is to listen carefully and tell their truth kindly. Even when the message to be delivered is difficult to say — it is said with honesty and compassion.
This builds a reservoir of trust and safety. Listening deeply to your partner allows him or her to feel truly seen and heard which is what we all long for.
4. Happy couples can successfully repair the damage.
We all have within us the potential to speak or act badly. It’s about being able to successfully manage the harm or hurt. Happy couples can empathize, apologize and forgive.
The key is to remain conscious of how we express ourselves and listen to our partners. The way we deliver messages is more important than the words we use. Keep in mind that “tone always trumps content.” For example you can say, “I heard you.” Depending upon the tone of voice used, the meaning can vary wildly.
5. Happy couples schedule fun.
They share conversations where they recall sweet memories. They offer up what they love about each other, which can jump-start loving feelings and diffuse bad ones.
But they also don't rely on thinking about the honeymoon phase to fuel the fire of their relationship in the present and into the future. Rather, they build on the pre-existing strengths of the relationship by scheduling fun experiences together that keep things new and fresh. They may even choose to spend time with other couples who have a healthy bond, which reinforces the positivity in their own relationship.
6. Happy couples have rituals.
They generally go to bed at the same time and wish each other good morning and good night regardless of how they feel and usually add a hug or kiss. They connect during the day, not only because they love each other and have the desire to be in touch, but because they realistically acknowledge that relationships are a practice.
7. Happy couples behave like good friends.
They handle their conflicts in primarily positive ways. They honor their individual needs and their shared goals — helping each other realize their goals and dreams. They do what they can to promote and safeguard each other’s happiness.
Most importantly, happy couples are committed to working hard on keeping their connection strong. They don’t take each other for granted and they actively practice these strategies and acts of loving kindness.

9 Amazing Pieces of Success Advice From Stephen Colbert

In two weeks Stephen Colbert will lead late night into a whole new era. Learn tips for getting to the top from one of the greatest disruptors.



If you are a Stephen Colbert fan, you are more than ready for September 8, when his new show begins in the old David Letterman slot on CBS. If you are still mourning Jon Stewart's retirement, I'd bet you're hoping to find solace in Colbert's return just in case Trevor Noah is a bust.
If you never watched either The Daily Show or The Colbert Report, you are about to be treated to a surprise. Colbert is one of the smartest stars on TV. He is able to quote Tolkien verbatim, disrupt political finance by raising a million dollars practically overnight as a joke, and confound experts and politicians alike with his knowledge in interviews. He does all this while entertaining the masses and generating significant revenue from sponsors.
As Colbert goes mainstream, you can see his brilliance shine in his entrepreneurial approach to pre-marketing. It's clever, different, and garnering attention in a noisy world. You could do worse than to learn success lessons from this genius-clown who will be coming to your world week nights at 11:30 p.m. Here are some of his best and most insightful reveals.

1. Serve others first.

A trained improvisational comedian, Colbert knows that the rules of improv theater not only apply to a staged scene but are sage lessons in life: "One of the things I was taught early on is that you are not the most important person in the scene. Everybody else is. And if they are the most important people in the scene, you will naturally pay attention to them and serve them. But the good news is you're in the scene too. So hopefully to them you're the most important person, and they will serve you. No one is leading, you're all following the follower, serving the servant."

2. Be aware of what you love.

"In my experience, you will truly serve only what you love, because, as The Prophet says, 'service is love made visible.' If you love friends, you will serve your friends. If you love community, you will serve your community. If you love money, you will serve money. And if you love only yourself, you will serve only yourself, and you will have only yourself." Having watched his show recorded live several times, it is obvious to me that Colbert loved and served the people around him as well as his audience. Clearly, he is well loved, respected, and in charge.

3. Sometimes the hard way is the only way -- take it anyway.

"If you must find your own path -- and you are left with no easy path -- then decide to take the hard path that leads you to the life and the world that you want." Giving up at the first sign of difficulty is a sure-fire way to let your dreams escape through your fingers. Colbert, a self-made man, knows that the way to achieving your dreams isn't always easy, but if you don't let anything deter you, it will be worth it.

4. See everything as an opportunity.

"One of the things that I like about improvisation is that, literally, there are no mistakes. There are only opportunities," said Colbert in a 2007 Parade Magazine interview. Apply this to your life -- every mistake and every misstep could uncover the opportunity that leads you to what you've always wanted.

5. Haters gonna hate: Let them.

There will always be people in the world who won't agree with you, or who judge you for the things you do. Colbert is clear that you don't need to listen to these opinions: "Realize that the things that people say about you don't really matter. It's who you are. And the older you get, the more you'll understand that."

6. Keep laughing.

Colbert, of course, is one of the world's premier funnymen. The Colbert Report was a great example of laughter being a way to turn difficult situations into manageable bumps. "You can't laugh and be afraid at the same time -- of anything," says Colbert. "If you are laughing, I defy you to be afraid."

7. Be inclusive, even if you have to hire people to do so.

In a Glamour article this month, Colbert addressed the dearth of females and female perspectives in late-night TV, in his own satirical Colbert fashion, of course. "Female viewers need more than a pretty face; they need someone who will represent their voice. I think this essay has proved that I have an authentic female perspective, because most of it was written by two female writers on my staff. Point is, I'm here for you, and that means I’m going to do my best to create a Late Show that not only appeals to women but also celebrates their voices."

8. Love failure as much as success.

Colbert's article in GQ this month gave real insight as to how he will keep generating so much successful content in a high-stakes environment. Imagine having to compete for attention every night against Jimmy Fallon and Jimmy Kimmel. "You gotta learn to love when you're failing. . . . The embracing of that, the discomfort of failing in front of an audience, leads you to penetrate through the fear that blinds you. Fear is the mind killer."

9. Say YES . . . a lot.

If you are wondering how Colbert made it to the top, here it is: his ability to step into opportunities when they came. He used one unparalleled word, from his early days at Second City and The Daily Show to now taking the place of David Letterman, the longest-running talk-show host of all time, on The Late Show. "Young people who pretend to be wise to the ways of the world are mostly just cynics. Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the furthest thing from it, because cynics don't learn anything. Cynicism is self-imposed blindness, a rejection of the world because we're afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us. Cynics always say 'no.' But saying 'yes' begins things. Saying 'yes' is how things grow. Saying 'yes' leads to knowledge. 'Yes' is for young people. So, for as long as you have the strength, say 'YES.' "

50 Quotes on Leadership Every Entrepreneur Should Follow

Every entrepreneur knows that the success of their business ultimately rests on their shoulders. Yes, the product you build and the team you hire are important, but your ability to lead is what carries your company.
With that kind of pressure, it’s easy to feel stressed, lonely and overwhelmed at times. Every great leader has faced a challenge that defined their greatness, which is why we often turn to their advice when needed.
Whether you’re an entrepreneur, business owner, or team leader, here are 50 inspirational quotes on leadership for when you need a little pep talk.
1. "A leader takes people where they want to go. A great leader takes people where they don't necessarily want to go, but ought to be." –Rosalynn Carter
2. “A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves.” - Lao Tzu
3. "It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse." -  Adlai E. Stevenson II
4. "Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut through argument, debate, and doubt to offer a solution everybody can understand." – Colin Powell
5. “The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. In between, the leader is a servant.” - Max DePree
6. "If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." – John Quincy Adams
7. “A leader is a dealer in hope.” - Napoleon Bonaparte
8. "A leader...is like a shepherd. He stays behind the flock, letting the most nimble go out ahead, whereupon the others follow, not realizing that all along they are being directed from behind." - Nelson Mandela
9. “He who has never learned to obey cannot be a good commander.” -Aristotle
10. "Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it." - Dwight D. Eisenhower
11. "As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others." – Bill Gates
12. “A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit." - John Maxwell
13. “Become the kind of leader that people would follow voluntarily; even if you had no title or position.” - Brian Tracy
14. "The leaders who offer blood, toil, tears and sweat always get more out of their followers than those who offer safety and a good time. When it comes to the pinch, human beings are heroic." – George Orwell
15. “I start each day by telling myself what a positive influence I am on this world.” - Peter Daisyme
16. “Earn your leadership every day." - Michael Jordan
17. "Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others." –Jack Welch
18. “Leadership is lifting a person’s vision to high sights, the raising of a person’s performance to a higher standard, the building of a personality beyond its normal limitations.” - Peter Drucker
19. "My job is not to be easy on people. My job is to take these great people we have and to push them and make them even better." - Steve Jobs
20. "The led must not be compelled. They must be able to choose their own leader." – Albert Einstein
21. “Great leaders find ways to connect with their people and help them fulfill their potential.” - Steven J. Stowell
22. "To have long-term success as a coach or in any position of leadership, you have to be obsessed in some way." - Pat Riley
23. "If you think you are leading and turn around to see no one following, then you are just taking a walk." – Benjamin Hooks
24. “The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold, but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud, but not arrogant; have humor, but without folly.” - Jim Rohn
25. "A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd." - Max Lucado
26. “To do great things is difficult; but to command great things is more difficult.” - Friedrich Nietzsche
27. "It is absolutely necessary...for me to have persons that can think for me, as well as execute orders." - George Washington
28. "Leaders aren’t born, they are made. And they are made just like anything else, through hard work." - Vince Lombardi
29. “A cowardly leader is the most dangerous of men.”  - Stephen King
30. "A man always has two reasons for doing anything: a good reason and the real reason."- J.P. Morgan
31. “Not the cry, but the flight of a wild duck, leads the flock to fly and follow.” - Chinese Proverb
32. "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
33. “No man will make a great leader who wants to do it all himself, or to get all the credit for doing it.”  - Andrew Carnegie
34. "Average leaders raise the bar on themselves; good leaders raise the bar for others; great leaders inspire others to raise their own bar." -Orrin Woodward
35. "Those who try to lead the people can only do so by following the mob." – Oscar Wilde
36. “Outstanding leaders go out of their way to boost the self-esteem of their personnel. If people believe in themselves, it’s amazing what they can accomplish.” - Sam Walton
37. “Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.” -  Albert Schweitzer
38. “If your actions create a legacy that inspires others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, then, you are an excellent leader.” - Dolly Parton
39. “I am reminded how hollow the label of leadership sometimes is and how heroic followership can be.” - Warren Bennis
40. “In this world a man must either be an anvil or hammer.” -  Henry W. Longfellow
41. “It is absurd that a man should rule others, who cannot rule himself. (Absurdum est ut alios regat, qui seipsum regere nescit.)” - Latin Proverb
42. “The history of the world is but the biography of great men.” -  Thomas Carlyle
43. “A ruler should be slow to punish and swift to reward.” - Ovid
44. “You don’t have to hold a position in order to be a leader” - Henry Ford
45. “Rely on your own strength of body and soul. Take for your star self-reliance, faith, honesty, and industry. Don't take too much advice — keep at the helm and steer your own ship, and remember that the great art of commanding is to take a fair share of the work. Fire above the mark you intend to hit. Energy, invincible determination with the right motive, are the levers that move the world.” - Noah Porter
46. "Don't blow off another's candle for it won't make yours shine brighter." Jaachynma N.E. Agu
47. “I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure, which is: Try to please everybody.”  - Herbert Swope
48. “He who has learned how to obey will know how to command.”  -Solon
49. “If one is lucky, a solitary fantasy can totally transform one million realities.” - Maya Angelou
50. “The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint to keep from meddling with them while they do it.” - Theodore Roosevelt
Bonus:
“Screw it, let’s just do it.” - Richard Branson

5 Tips for Becoming a Brilliant Conversationalist

No matter how meticulously you plan your words, you can never control how your message is received. However, several things are within your control, like timeliness, intensity and volume. Knowing what’s within your power and preparing in advance will help you to maximize each opportunity to communicate. Here are five keys to making your message count:

1. Never wing it.

Every conversation I’ve left with regrets shares a common denominator --- I didn’t think before I spoke. Most of us are at our best when we have ample time to process our thoughts before sharing them. If a conversation or meeting is worth your time to schedule, it’s worth taking a few minutes to develop an outline beforehand. For a particularly important dialogue, consider role-playing the conversation with a trusted colleague to remove the rough edges.

2. Think about it from the receiver’s perspective.

Put yourself in the other person’s shoes when shaping your strategy. This ensures a balanced approach and will prepare you to not only support your position, but also to challenge any potential rebuttals.

3. Be prepared for different responses.

No one can predict with 100 percent certainty how everyone will respond. Increase your chances that a conversation goes well by anticipating negative or questioning replies. This lessens the likelihood that you’ll be caught off guard.

4. Approach with reason and logic.

A point that is introduced with logic and confidence is less likely to be met with hostility. The key is to approach each conversation with objective-minded reasoning supported by data or fact, if possible.

5. Don’t forget the emotional side.

While point number four stresses the need for objective conversation, it’s important to remember that emotions often trump logic. Don’t underestimate the influence emotions can play in the perception of a message --- and understand which ones your words may evoke.
Finally, strive to be not simply an effective communicator, but a brilliant one. Your point comes across clearer in a well-articulated conversation. While it may not be perfect -- at least right away -- aiming for brilliance is the best way to get there.