How To Endure Hardship To Better Succeed (By Sergei VanBellinghen)

At times, it is quite challenging to endure hardship and get back up when life kicks you to the ground. No matter if you want to succeed or just live only, it seems to be an endless cycle of frustrations and victories. However, it should come to no surprise that life is always full of ups and downs.

What do you do when times get tough? Do you retreat into despair and blame other people? Or do you confront your problems courageously and overcome them? How can you withstand hardship?

I understand; it is not comfortable being in situations you have no control over or getting in circumstances that seem to be entirely unfair to you. But issues and problems will undoubtedly find their way into your life because it is normal. Regardless of any hardship, you may face now or later, what is essential is to get back up and move forward.

You have to realize that often, painful experiences in life may come with an eventual advantage. It can offer you the capacity to better appreciate the small pleasures in life and to have a better chance to succeed.

Should I remind you of an example of hardship, such as Abraham Lincoln who failed in business, had a nervous breakdown, and was defeated eight times in elections before becoming president?

Understanding Hardship

Most of us are usually afraid that adversity will get the better of us. But if you think about it, how many times have you gotten past what you thought would be the worst hardship in your life? The answer is obvious! It means that you are alive, you survived, so it only proves that you are stronger.

So, you have to allow each hardship you had to become an opportunity for you to see beyond the load of resentment that you carry with you. You should understand that adversities are a regular and essential part of becoming more mature.

Besides, experiencing any suffering, pain or hardship is a phase of life we cannot escape from and that all of us go through. I agree that when you get older, it is much harder to change your character but not impossible. It just takes longer and more effort to find yourself again and realign your life.

Hardships Create Change

In my own life, I dealt so many times with hardship and failure, and yet I am still here. I had an average family. I had to handle physical abuse, see domestic violence, and even watch friends die. My two marriages were a failure. I worked at so many jobs in so many places, but I often abandoned when I felt like I had failed.

Today, I am a personal growth and success expert who is writing two books. Yet, I still often meet hardship through my desire to succeed even more. You cannot change life happening to you, but you can modify your outcomes to get out successful. It might be hard to do, but it is only a matter of knowing how.

So, you have to be willing to grow, evolve, and change always. By learning from hardship, you help yourself to understand how to endure adversity and overcome the very worst life throws at you.

But how can you be able to endure and overcome all of these hard times?

How to Endure Hardship

Despite all your trials, life continues and can be turned around in your favor. Of course, there are no instant cures for any of the hardships that may arise in your life. But there are, however, some methods to deal with what you encounter.

The ability to endure hardship is what separates successful people from unsuccessful ones.

Accept Hardship as Reality

It is imperative to accept whatever is happening to you because accepting circumstances bring faster understanding, progress and changes. This view and attitude provide quicker solutions which in turn produce results, and you can get back up again, only stronger.

Come to Terms with Adversity

You need to come to terms with what is happening. Look at every hardship as a new experience to improve your life. Life goes on, so make the right decision by moving forward. Stop dwelling on "what could have been" or "what if" situations. You cannot go back. So, accept your new scar, and move on.

Perception is Important

Perception is a crucial element to any hardship. What I mean is that, if you think negative thoughts or have negative emotions while in a situation; well it is going to bring out negative outcomes. So your view and perception are always critical. When hardship hits, you need to have the strength to change your painful feelings by looking at it in a new perspective. It allows you to withstand adversity and to surmount it.

Tips to Endure Hardship

• When hardship hits you, it is not easy to know which emotions it will bring to the surface. So, when such hard times come your way, it requires time and patience on your part. To succeed in surviving adversity is to keep silent, tap into your strengths.
• Rediscover inspiration as it brings hope and desire, which also produce positivity. It helps you to move forward, and away from the pits of despair that trouble you when enduring hardship.
• Take time for yourself. Sit down with no distractions, phone, social media, e-mail, or television. And then listen. Take a look at yourself and catch what your higher-self has to say. Just listen to it.
• Reflect on your current circumstances. Imagine and expect to overcome this challenging situation in your life. See yourself get over the hardship. Learn to master any tough situation and let go your thoughts and emotions.
• Wait for a better outlook and desire within you. Then come up with an escape plan from your current circumstance. Have a vision of where you want to be, then start filling in the details and which way to start moving forward.
• After all of the above, one of the most evident pieces of the puzzle is to take action. I know it is easier said than done but you have no choice if you want to surmount hardship. Many things may hold you back, but you have to act despite feelings.

Overcoming Hardship

When it comes to taking action, learn from mistakes or making an actual change, as very few of us follow through. You have to do your best to overcome hardship really, and not just endure it. You need to begin modifying your status quo.

Hardships are part of everyone's lives, but you have to realize and pursue an existence that can bring progress and positive changes to your world. It is better to surround yourself with people who care, want the best for you, and do believe in you.

Throughout life, you face different intensities of hardship, but learn to stay positive so that you can continue to grow and succeed. Finally, you need to see that going through hard times is a standard order of things. Any hardship takes an unbelievable amount of perseverance to get ahead.

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Win The Day

The concept of "win the day" has caught some attention in recent years. The University of Oregon and their former coach, Chip Kelly, used it to motivate their players to stay on task each and every day. It's really pretty simple, but for many of us, including myself, we struggle with the execution of it.

We struggle doing the small tasks daily, that will make a big difference for the goal we're trying to accomplish. But why is that? The only way to truly answer that, is to look at yourself right now, and to figure out what's stopping you from winning the day and getting you one step closer to accomplishing your goal.

Set a goal, create a plan to achieve it, then go to work. That's easy to say and even write, but for a lot of us, we fail at one of those stages. Maybe even all of those stages. We might do well at setting the goal but fail to create a plan on achieving it. Or we might create a plan but fail at executing it. That's where "win the day" comes into play.

Take a look at your day. What will it take today to win it? Keep in mind that to win, you only have to be 1 point or 1% better. So for example, if you break out your day into 10 actions, then you only have to complete 6 of those to win the day. And if you do that 4 out of the 7 days in a week, then you win the week. If you do that 16 days out of 30 days in a month, then you win the month, so on and so forth.

You can see how that will add up quickly and build up confidence on the goal you're trying to accomplish. We often think that success comes down to one big moment, but in reality, it comes down to thousands of smaller moments. Moments that you can either attack and try to win, or moments you can choose to skip and decide to tell yourself you'll do it later. That decision may not seem like a big deal, but it's add up, and eventually, it will bite you. Think about it as compound interest. Over time, if applied correctly, your daily actions will eventually build enough of a foundation that it's not possible for you to fail, at least in the traditional sense.

"Winning is not a sometime thing; it's an all the time thing. You don't win once in a while; you don't do things right once in a while; you do them right all the time. Winning is a habit. Unfortunately, so is losing." - Vince Lombardi

This is such a powerful quote from the late Vince Lombardi, who has coached, hundreds if not thousands of individual winners as well as created several winning teams. The power of winning and what it can do for your confidence is such an amazing thing.

Here's 5 habits all winners share:* 

1. Winners have positive self-esteem - Self esteem is a person's overall evaluation or appraisal of her or his own worth.
2. Winners are optimistic - Optimism is expecting the most favorable result from your actions. Winners not only think positively, they obsess about it.
3. Winners have positive self motivation - Focus on where you want to go instead of the obstacles in your path. Drive and persistence will take you to your desired destination. Don't allow fear to restrict or defeat your goals.
4. Winners have a high internal standard - With a high internal standard you're driven from within and not affected by what others think or the outcome of the situation.
5. Winners have positive self discipline - You may be motivated to succeed but you have to constantly work toward your goals. Practice, practice, practice. Excellence isn't a one week or one year ideal. It's a constant.

Everyone of us can be a winner, but you have to be committed to continuous growth and improvement. Athletes of all ages can be and should be taught this. We all know that for most of us, sports will eventually stop, but the value of learning to become a winner can be applied to all aspects of our life.

Losers complain. Winners train and gain. Losers seek attention. Winners earn respect. Losers blame others for their problems. Winners find solutions. Losers live in the past. Winners learn from their past to better their futures.

It's time to get excited about YOUR dreams and to take responsibility for YOUR decisions. Break out your day into smaller actions and start WINNING THE DAY!

*Some of this information was taken from SlideShare.net, "Psychology Of The Winner"

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Self-Improvement and Success

"No one else knows exactly what the future holds for you, no one else knows what obstacles you've overcome to be where you are, so don't expect others to feel as passionate about your dreams as you do." 

• Germany Kent

Talent manifests itself in ways, It is an exceptional blessing, which gives us a genuine reason to impart our story to the world. We take so much time pondering what's missing, and neglect to concentrate on what we can fulfill today, and overlook yesterday and tomorrow.

Pressure to belong leads to unnecessary questions and million voices that distract us along the way and lead you to sacrifice your interests. The 'substance' that you didn't surrender will dependably give you certainty to stick up to your firearms. Furthermore, what you require is time, center, vitality, as you learn to not to manage the most exceedingly bad but also grow from it.

You have the power, 'No one but YOU'' can conquer these square and go ahead with life and flourish.

1. Try not to quit accepting notwithstanding when everything is befuddling: Conviction shows itself as capable vitality those words of the reckless feelings. Keep your eyes on the prize and utilize this as an inspiration to get past harsh circumstances.

2. Before making an important choice: Always remember every choice has its price, Keep in mind the reason you fell in love with your dream, and take it as an inspiration you will require when times get harsh.

2. Don't quit: At some point in life, we all want to surrender and give in, You never know in a moment or two you may be nearer to your goal sooner than you know. Absolutely never get the dread of losing get to you. Enjoy a reprieve, sit tight for the pastry, yet don't stop. Keep in mind the mystery of achievement and you may be enticed to stop just before you are going to succeed.

3. Evil spirits oblivious: Whether it's a film or a genuine there will dependably be times when you will come across negative entities; whose rationale is to separate you from your dream goals, laugh at you, and whisper the words loaded with antagonism, till you begin to trust that you don't merit this. Try not to get annihilated. Furthermore, square them from entering your psyche.

4. Tune in to everybody except do what you need: Experience is the best instructor in life. Keep in mind the stage, where we do all that we are advised not to, and the inclination and flexibility it gives you. We know they have your best advantages on the most fundamental level, however, recollect just you recognize what's best for you. Keep a receptive outlook, don't close them out, and however don't disregard your impulses either!

5. Stay in alignment with your goal: Each and every spirit in this world, now and there ever was, has come here for a reason. By concentrating without anyone else inside development, each and every of us has a one of a kind blessing to offer; the capacity to improve this world a place by inspiring this innovative power you to adjust yourself to your actual reason.

6. Versatile: Things in life won't end mystically, so be set up to confront what will come your way. To get something, you have to give something. You have to acknowledge your blemishes and assume liability for your activities. Even if things don't work in your favor, open the other entryway and you may be amazed what the universe has gotten ready for you. There is a purpose for everything.

7. Tolerating Intolerance; it takes a considerable measure of valor to conflict with the tides and million questions in your psyche when it comes to your dreams. It's what you get from your experience, your life, what this journey has taught. You know your quality and weaknesses. The energy of knowing the difference is a fuel that touches off the inventive energy of your considerations to satisfy your potential and eventually choose how you live.

"Beyond your wildest imagination, there is something worth working for." 

• Gordon Attard

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How To Overcome Feeling Down And Depressed - Rather Treat Yourself Well

Have you ever noticed that when you treat yourself better it goes a long way towards making you feel much better and not so very depressed?

For some people, its shopping, working on the car, playing the guitar, taking a long bubble bath, exercising, eating ice cream.

Think about what makes you feel better and comforted and spend some time overcoming being so very depressed.

Helping others or someone in particular will make you feel like you're letting go of being very depressed.

You will feel like you are a giver.

Sometimes seeing a smile on a person's face and knowing you had a hand in putting it there can turn a very depressed day into a great one.

Below are a few things you can do to get out of that rut and feel so much more alive.

None of these things will change the situation, but they will make you feel better and help you get through that very depressed feeling until things get better - and they will always get better.

First consider what the Course in Miracles teaches us in one of its spiritual metaphysical principles: "You may still think that holiness is impossible to understand, because you can not see how it can be extended to include everyone."

Nothing lasts forever and most bad days don't carry into the next.

Know that there is a more positive day just around the corner than just, why am I so depressed.

And the Course in Miracles adds, "And you have been told that it must include everyone to be holy."

It is the wrong-minded memories that keep haunting us when we go through rough territory.

Be sure to only spend time on the past memories that are all loving and fun.

Be sure to think about how do you move on and make the necessary changes so that you may live a life of passion and purpose and a free will that is true and that you own?

Yes, ask yourself this deeply!

Is this where you will find peace?

By taking time to think about those who have less than you, you will start to think about how to treat yourself well and get over feeling down and depressed. Make sense?

Just keep in mind that life can be brutal to us if we allow it to, and things can pop up when we're not ready for it.

To a better life!

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This Is Why You Can Fail In Life And Still End Up Where You Need To Be

The Roadmap To Victory

You can fail in life and end up where you need to be because failure is not permanent - giving up is.

Countless articles are sprawled across the internet, advocating the key to success. However, the conversation around failure is less prominent.

If there's one thing I've learned it's this: failure is not as disastrous as people believe it to be.

Thomas Edison once said: "Show me a thoroughly satisfied man and I will show you a failure."

It may seem negative at first. Yet, if you move past the fears, failure is nothing more than a signpost guiding you in the right direction.

You might try assigning a human quality to failure, to relate to it better. Don't see it as a force outside you inhibiting success, but as an integral part of your psyche leaving clues towards success.

Renowned author Elizabeth Gilbert writes in Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear: "You can measure your worth by your dedication to your path, not by your successes or failures."

We are not entrusted with a road map marking our way through life, so we're left to make it up as we go along. For this reason, be compassionate with yourself since you don't have all the answers at your disposal.

Think of failure as being blindfolded in a maze and asked to find your way out. To find the exit, you must take the wrong turns to gain insight on the direct passage out.

Your failures (taking the wrong turns) become the roadmap to victory (finding the exit).

Life functions in the same respect, in so far as the key to success is contained within your mistakes.

Success Lessons

Some people recover from failures quicker than others, but it is the lessons gained from the experience that is paramount.

"Serial winners bounce back, move on, and win anyway. And they do it through action," affirms Larry Weidel in Serial Winner: 5 Actions to Create Your Cycle of Success.

Failure sharpens the saw of the human will and endows us with determination.

I attended a mastermind group for several years where it was restated that we should fail often and fail fast. The significance is to speed the rate at which you fail and learn from the lessons.

You can fail in life and still end up where you need to be because failures are pivotal moments in your success journey. Whilst it may not appear that way, it is because you're invested in your life story.

A mentor is helpful to guide you through your failures than if you were to go it alone.

Author Jeff Olson's writes in The Slight Edge: "Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal. 'Progressive' means success is a process, not a destination. It's something you experience gradually, over time. Failure is also just as gradual. In fact, the difference between success and failure is so subtle, you can't even see it or recognize it during the process. And here's how real success is built: by the time you get the feedback, the real work's already done."

What you consider failure, others see as vital success lessons. You can reframe failure as learning aids through repeated setbacks.

Consider it as a letting go moment. Just as you no longer play with your childhood toys since you have outgrown them, your relationship with failure ought to be the same.

Many people don't succeed because they associate failure with their self-worth and never try again.

The point worth highlighting is to outgrow your negative association to failure, so it doesn't impact your self-worth.

"I learned then that there is a difference between failing and failure. Failing is trying something that you learn doesn't work. Failure is throwing in the towel and giving up. I refused to be a failure. As Winston Churchill once said, "Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm," writes author Jay Samit in Disrupt Yourself.

Success is a Destination

Many people equate success with frequent wins and fewer setbacks. The reality is, more defeats lead to success if the individual is willing to learn from the setbacks.

For example, you can be rejected by nine out of ten record labels but if you are a musician you can still be remarkably successful with the one offer.

Authors Jeff Brown and Mark Fenske remind us in The Winner's Brain: 8 Strategies Great Minds Use to Achieve Success: "Winners reframe failures so that they work to their advantage and recognize that when things don't go according to plan the journey isn't necessarily over - and in fact failure is often a new opportunity in disguise."

There's a meme that gets shared on social media depicting what we imagine success to be and its corresponding associations.

It highlights why it's important to develop a new framework around failure, if you wish to succeed.

Failure invigorates the human spirit or delivers a crushing blow to person's self-worth. Either way, it governs whether the individual has what it takes to find a way through their challenges.

The saying 'Don't look a gift horse in the mouth' applies to failure. For it was the American motivational speaker Jim Rohn who once quipped: "Success leaves clues."

In a similar vein, the late Hungarian mathematician Farkas Bolyai wrote: "When the time is ripe for certain things, they appear at different places, in the manner of violets coming to light in early spring."

Knowing this, reframe your perception of failure as a signpost leading you closer to a prosperous future.

As long as you don't give up, success is a destination you will reach if you are firm in your determination, like a train bound to its tracks.

After all, failure is life's way of nudging you back on track, to reach your destination when the time is right - as long as you stay on course and never give up.

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The Key To Success Is Knowing The Last Door Is Always The Best One

Unconscious Self-Sabotage

The struggle people often face is staying committed to their goals long after the novelty has worn off.

I've heard reasons people give up on their goals such as: "It wasn't meant to be" or "It wasn't fun anymore" or "Life is about having fun."

The point worth emphasising is that we can create all the reasons in the world for not following through on our commitments and find evidence to support it.

But is this how you want to live your life? Hiding behind your doubts and insecurities just to feel better?

We don't want to be wrong and will give up on a goal rather than risk looking foolish to ourselves. Known as confirmation bias, it is the tendency to look for evidence or evaluate information in a way to confirm your bias.

Let's be honest, we're all prone to it and just because I'm writing this article I'm not immune from it. The key is to be aware and take the right action, so we don't fall into our comfort zone while our goals slip away from us.

Your beliefs about success will help or hinder your progress.

They may be unconscious, meaning you formed beliefs you are unaware of and are looking for evidence to support them thus self-sabotaging your efforts to succeed.

I like author Larry Weidel's definition of what success entails: "Success has two rules: 1. Pay full price. 2. Pay in advance."

Countless biographies about successful people line the bookshelves where the narrative seldom involves an easy path.

Let's be clear, success is built on discipline, hard work, perseverance, grit, will and courage.

"To succeed, always remember that the main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing," is the advice echoed by motivational author Brendon Burchard in his recent book High Performance Habits: How Extraordinary People Become That Way.

The Chase For Success

It is almost certain you will fail while pursuing your goals.

It is almost certain you will want to give up.

It is almost certain you will experience mental and emotional distress.

It is almost certain you will neglect your health, family, and relationships, investing all your time pursuing your goal.

However, Brendon Burchard believes "A warrior's destiny is greater than his wounds."

Let's be clear on what success is. It can relate to areas of life where progress is reached. It is not defined by material wealth, nor fame or international recognition alone.

Vishen Lakhiani explains in The Code of the Extraordinary Mind: 10 Unconventional Laws to Redefine Your Life and Succeed On Your Own Terms: "I came to the conclusion that the way we define success, centred only on the two metrics of money and power, is just a very inadequate way to define life."

"It's like trying to sit on a two-legged stool-sooner or later, we topple over. And that's when I came up with this idea of the third metric of success, which consists of four pillars: well-being, wisdom, wonder, and giving."

In a similar vein, it was Bob Dylan who said: "A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between he does what he wants to do."

Yet, success is fickle.

We pursue it believing it holds the key to our happiness.

We pursue it to make up for our shortfalls and hide behind wealth and fame to make up for our childhood insecurities.

We chase success believing once we reach it we will be: complete, fulfilled, happy, recognised and better off. However, if success is pursued for the wrong reason, we amplify the self-doubt present within us.

A Sense of Purpose and Meaning

Author and businessman T Harv Ecker said: "It's is bad enough being a prick, but being a prick with millions of dollars is far worse. You're bound to use your power and wealth to justify your self-worth."

In a similar view, what happens to a millionaire's self-esteem if they go bankrupt? The same thing that happens to elite athletes when they're injured; a deflated self-worth resulting in depression and anger.

They learned to identify with their performance alone while neglecting their human qualities. I'm not suggesting it's their fault because seconds count when it comes to a gold medal.

We want to reach success for the right reasons and be fulfilled on all levels. Success is not the answer if you're looking to ease your problems. It will only compound your problems if you pursue it blindly.

You might think from the tone of the article I am opposed to success. Quite the contrary, I enjoy success and embrace it for what it brings to my life. It has allowed me to help others realise their greatness and potential, however small or big.

The story of success reminds me of The Fisherman and the Businessman tale told in countless business books.

Success requires us to be purposeful about our lives according to Brendon Burchard: "Be more intentional about who you want to become. Have vision beyond your current circumstances. Imagine your best future self and start acting like that person today."

The last door is always the best one because if you stay committed to your goals and pursue them with determination, vigour and courage, your efforts will be rewarded.

Success shapes a man.

It promotes his sense of self and instils purpose and meaning in his life. Success is the expansion of life coursing through you. It needs to grow and cultivate new beginnings so it may know its creative potential.

It can only do so through you as the vessel to know its creative force.

The last door is the only door that matters.

Only then you realise that every closed door, every missed opportunity, every setback and failed attempt was perfectly orchestrated to lead you to the last door of success.

Make it splendid and stay passionate and enthusiastic, to walk through the door and become someone you appreciate in the mirror each morning.

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Do You Learn More From Your Success Or Your Adversity, Problems And Hardships?

                 

Think this is a redundant, stupid or foolish question? Then why not go back to your daily "to do" list. If not - read on you might see a few things differently as a result.

First of all, let me state the obvious - everyone in life faces adversity, trials, hardships etc. of some kind in life sooner or later. No one is privileged to escape pain while they live their life journey - whether financial, relationship, career, business or health.

Before I move on let me state one more common obvious fact - no one handles, reacts, manages or deals with life's issues the same as everyone else. Some use them to whine and complain - others use them to grow, improve or mature. While others sit there in a coma wondering - what should I (can I) do?

Before we move on however, I'm sure you know which camp you are in the whining one hopefully this article will be of value to you. If you are in the growing camp I'm sure you know someone who is in the whining group, so why not read it and then forward it to them - you never know - it might just be what they need today.

OK, back to my message.

Success can teach us many things - what works, what feels good, what is of value in our life or the life of others, that we are on the right path and doing the right things etc. But, here's the problem with successes lessons - they tend to prevent us from looking at what isn't working or wrong or how what we are doing could be working even better. Consistent success tends to keep people stuck - yes, they have had many success benefits but imagine for a moment if they could achieve even better success if they would learn to see past their success to what could be?

Everyone has achieved some degree of success in some areas of their life whether raising great kids or creating a wonderful backyard garden or building a successful business from scratch. These are all worthy accomplishments but again I ask you - if you could have accomplished even more (a better garden, better kids, better business etc.) would you have settled for what you achieved knowing you could have done more that was within your skills or power?

Success is not just about achievement or winning but serving, giving back, learning and the journey. Today's successes can be tomorrow's failures. No success is guaranteed to last for a lifetime or even years. Success like life is a process but if success keeps you from learning then you are missing what real success is - going past your own definition of your potential and seeing life from a broader perspective.

I'm not saying we can ever see our life or our future from God's perspective but there's no reason why we shouldn't try and see it from a wiser or better human perspective one and not limited by conventional wisdom, previous successes, other's judgements or our own limited belief system.

In the final analysis what can success teach us?

A few of the obvious ones are - gratitude, caution, patience, faith and the value of persistence. Yes, there are many others but in the end without these we will tend not to learn what life offers.

What can adversity, problems, hardship or failure teach us? I could go on for pages with this section but, I'm sure you have better things to do than read my diatribes so let me keep it brief.

First of all, a few important concepts to consider:

-Anyone who has ever achieved and worthwhile success has faced trials, failure, adversity etc. 

-Failure is necessary for great and sustained success. 

-Failure, adversity etc. is not what is happening to us but how we respond, react, deal with it, learn from it or use it for something good. 

-Adversity and problems etc. are in our life to teach us - not about them or it but us.

So, what can we learn from these negative situations?

Think of adversity, problems challenges etc. as a classroom environment and they are the teacher. If you want to pass the course you'll need to pay attention, do your homework and figure out where the important learning is in all of the chaos and uncertainty. Learning Geometry is not easy if you are not good with numbers.

Learning to manage problems is not easy if you have never had any or have never managed them successfully in the past.

Failure, adversity, hardship etc. use pain, disappointment, rejection, ambiguity, distress, abandonment, uncertainty, discomfort, isolation and many other circumstances to get our attention and the courage to take action.

I'm not in any way suggesting that we should seek out failure, adversity etc. but I'm also not suggesting that we hide our heads in the sand or go into denial simply because we don't like what we are experiencing.

Trust me - if you don't learn a lesson life wants you to learn sooner or later you'll get another chance to learn the same lesson.

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The New Science of Happiness and Success

Would you like to be happier?

Would you like to be more successful?

Whenever I ask people these two questions, as I have done many times over the past 35 years, I find that virtually everyone's answers are the same; a resounding, "Yes, of course! Who wouldn't?"

If I then follow these questions up with another question, such as, "What would it take for you to be happier?" I generally receive a response like, "More money", "More peace of mind", "More time off work", or perhaps a response like, "A better relationship" or better 'job', 'salary' or 'body' etc.

The thought process behind these answers reveals a fundamental pattern which seems to be true of pretty well everyone, namely the idea that for us to be happier, we need something else, specifically more success, either in our finances, in our relationships, in our health or in any other area of our lives. This thought pattern reveals a fundamental aspect of virtually everyone's beliefs about the way life works. Namely, that more success leads to more happiness.

This basic concept, that more success) leads to more happiness seems so self-evident that we seldom question it. Indeed, we never even notice that we are thinking this way. But this attitude is what author Jack Canfield, of the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" series of books, calls, "living on 'Someday Isle'.

In other words, as Canfield says, we tell ourselves, "Someday I'll have more money." Or "Someday I'll have better health." Or "Someday I'll have the right relationship." Or, "Someday I'll lose that ten pounds." The implication with this line of thinking is the same; the basic belief that "When I get the success I want I will be happy.

But is this line of thinking really true? Does more success really lead to more happiness?

"Not at all." says Shawn Achor, author of the best-selling book, "The Happiness Advantage" (Crown Publishing, New York, 2010).

Trained by some of the pioneers in the new discipline of Positive Psychology, Achor helped design and teach the famed "Happiness" course, for years the most popular course at Harvard. Since then, (according to his on-line biography), he has spoken at or worked with over a third of Fortune 100 companies and his TED talk is one of the most popular of all time, with over 13 million views.

The front flap of his book reads, "Conventional wisdom holds that if we work hard, we will be more successful, and if we are more successful, then we'll be happy. But recent discoveries in the field of positive psychology have shown that this formula is actually backward."

He explains that when we are positive, our brains become more engaged, creative, motivated, energetic, resilient, and productive at work. This discovery has been borne out by rigorous research in psychology and neuroscience. It has also been proven true in the boardrooms and on the bottom lines of organizations around the globe.

This change in thinking echoes the transformation that followed the reversal of the conventional belief that the sun revolved around the earth. According to Achor, this new discovery that conventional thinking is backward and that it is happiness which leads to success and not the other way round, promises to be as earth shaking and life transforming in its impact.

However, this recent bit of scientific knowledge which is a result of recent brain scanning research, is not the only evidence that our previous ideas about the human condition are wrong that has come to light in the last couple of decades. Just as profound and potentially earth shaking is the recent discovery (also using brain imaging technology) that the structure of our brains, which was long believed to be fixed and unchangeable, is actually plastic and continually changes throughout the course of our lives.

Although some of the new ideas about our brains seem like common sense, others are a little harder to grasp. For example, the proof that when a person learns to play the piano, certain parts of the brain undergo measurable changes, seems, upon reflection, to be quite reasonable. After all, we know that the nerves which move the fingers have connections to specific areas of the brain, so the fact that these areas of the brain would grow through endless repetitive piano exercises, like a person building his biceps by lifting weights, seems eminently reasonable.

But how about feeling happy? Does practicing feeling happy produce changes in the brain as well?

In a word, writes Achor, "Yes".

Furthermore, there seems to be no limit to how far these changes can go. Numerous studies have confirmed many ways we can permanently raise our happiness baseline and adopt a more positive mindset simply by doing certain kinds of thought exercises.

And Achor is not the only author writing about this discovery. According to Sharon Begley, author of "Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain", (Ballantine Books, New York, 2007) the long held scientific dogma that the brain was forever fixed and unchangeable, implied that one's 'happiness set point', which is the level of happiness to which one returned after experiencing a deep tragedy or a great joy was as unalterable as the earth's orbit. However it now appears that our 'happiness set point' can be altered quite easily. And when we re-set it, it remains the new baseline for happiness long into the future.

Here is a key idea which most people simply miss; that an individual's personal inner world of emotions, feelings and self-talk, and her outer world of observations, experiences and conscious reasoning are linked. After all, is not the nervous system responsible for your feelings of happiness or unhappiness, optimism or pessimism, not the same nervous system which is responsible for other cognitive functions as well?

We all have noticed that when we are feeling down, our perceptions of the world are negative too. We not only feel low. We also feel that our goals and desires are less attainable. We feel that opportunities are eluding us. We tell ourselves that life is becoming more difficult. On the other hand, when we are feeling optimistic, we not only feel more positive, we will also see more opportunities for positive results in the world. We not only feel that our dreams and goals are attainable, we can actually see more opportunities in the outer world. How many popular songs have been written on the same theme; that when we are in love, the sun seems to shine a lot more frequently.

Therefor it follows, according to Begley and Achor, that when we re-set out happiness set point, we not only recover from set-backs more quickly and perceive negative results in a more positive light, but we also feel better and more optimistic about the world in general. When our brains change, we begin to actually see more opportunities for success and satisfaction in the external world. What the findings of this new research is showing us, is that when we re-set our inner happiness set point, our outer world undergoes a positive shift too. For all of us who have harbored the desire to change the world, this new information shows us that it might actually be possible. While we might not be able to change someone else's world, we can indeed change our own.

So how do we re-set out happiness set point? It is amazingly easy. All we need to do is to practice FEELING happy for a few minutes a day on a regular basis. They say nothing succeeds like success. And nothing attracts more opportunities for success and happiness than an inner feeling of happiness and well-being.

If you want to reset your own 'happiness set-point, try this simple exercise:

1- On a sheet of paper, write down a small number (five or six is enough) of what I call, "Past Successes". These are simply events from the past which we consider to be positive successes. And here's the thing; they don't need to be huge successes. Simple successes like getting your driver's licence, learning to bowl or baking an amazing chocolate cake are perfect. Here's the key: does remembering this past event make you to FEEL happier and more successful? If the answer is 'yes', write it down on your 'Past Successes List'.

2- Read this list over every day for five minutes. While you do this, actually FEEL the feelings of happiness and success in your body. You might want to do this exercise while listening to a favorite piece of relaxing music. As you read your list, make an effort to really FEEL the feelings in your body. As you think of other past successes (And you will.) add them to your list.

3- Repeat this exercise each day for four to six weeks. Scientific experiments have conclusively shown that over this period of time, actual, physical changes in the brain are measurable.

4- Keep a simple diary of how this exercise is affecting not only your inner world of thoughts and feelings, but also note any observations of successful events in the outer world. Expect your world to shift and it will.

Is there any limit to how far one can take this brain training exercise? According to Achor, there doesn't seem to be. As he writes, "The point is, we do not know the limits of human potential. Just as we can't know the limit for how fast a human can run or swim or how high a person can jump, we still don't know the limits of our brain's enormous potential to grow and adapt to changing circumstances. All we know is that this kind of change is possible."

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-New-Science-of-Happiness-and-Success&id=9705132

Four Point Agenda For A More Fulfilling Life

Life is a beautiful gift of God. It is quite possible to live an ideal life in line with your dreams and desires. You can make your life more meaningful, more enjoyable, more fulfilling and more worthy of living by working on the following four points. These points cover all aspects of a person's life.

1. Education 

The most valuable thing which a person can possess is education. Nothing big can be achieved in life without education. A well educated person can live an overall better life and is a blessing to the society. When I talk about education, I do not necessarily mean the formal education limited to getting a college or university degree. I want people to get formal or informal education to widen their mental horizon so that they can see beyond limitations. Learning is a life-long process. You must keep on enriching your life by seeking knowledge and learning multiple skills. The more you learn the more successful you will be in your future life.

2. Money 

Money is all, most people go far. To them money is everything. They use all type of tactics, fair or unfair, to get money. Are these people successful or happy in life? No. They end up in misery and put themselves in trouble.

Your education, knowledge, skills, morals and good manners help you to get a good job or start a profitable business. Besides earning money to live a comfortable life, you also need to learn how to wisely invest your money so that your money keeps on growing and multiplying. You also need to control your expenditure so that you keep on investing your spare money in profitable businesses. It is also important to keep a balance between earning and spending otherwise you will put yourself in financial trouble.

3. Health 

The third important aspect of your life is YOU, your own health and physical fitness. If you are healthy and physically fit then you can do multiple tasks and increase your income substantially. If you are not in good health then you can do nothing not even enjoy your life. Take care of your health at all costs. Keep yourself away from all types of stress, depression or negativity. Do exercise regularly and eat a balanced food. Never skip the morning breakfast.

4. Family 

Family life is, no doubt, the most important aspect of a person's life. A supporting and loving family is a blessing. Spend some quality time with your spouse. Your children also need your company. Some people are so much involved in their professional activities that they completely ignore their family, which is their biggest mistake. Never give preference to your job over your family life. Your family deserves your full attention, affection and love.

Treat the above four points (Education, Money, Health and Family), as the four pillars on which the beautiful building of your life stands. Every pillar of this building is important. If one or two pillars are weak or damaged then there is a continuous danger of collapsing of the whole building some day. Take care of all the four pillars of this building which are inter-connected and inter-related with your happiness and a more fulfilling life.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Four-Point-Agenda-For-A-More-Fulfilling-Life&id=9750171

Message From the Universe: Planning for Success (By Daniel A Amzallag)

"I always knew I could count on you to uncover the truth, when others just played "follow the leader." I wasn't surprised at all to find you standing by your principles when the going got tough. And there was never any doubt in my mind that when faced with a fork in the road, you'd take the path less travelled.

I just had no idea you'd have such expensive taste.

You so rock, 

The Universe"

It is said that when people follow the masses, they really follow asses. They follow blindly just because others are following behind the one in the front. They assume that if everyone does it, I should to. No one thinks for themselves nowadays, as it is about just following someone who think is smart and give them the power they need to control the mass. Why not think for yourself? No one is to blame as this how the system is set up. The government creates entities, like the Commander-in-Chief and allocates enough power to control the people of that country. It is not because the system is set up this way that you need to abide to it. No one, not event the President, is aloud to control your thoughts. You are free to think the way you want. Just follow what is right for you and do not do anything you don't want because others advise you to do so.

We all need to wake up and realize what is going on out there. So much is available on the internet and I agree, it is a bit scary. Knowledge is power, not money and it is up to us to wise up and understand what is going on out there and take control of what we deem extremely important: OUR FREEDOM. I know that the truth can be scary and this is why the majority of the citizens refuse to read about it. Whoever is gutsy enough to express the truth to others will be seen as someone trying to create chaos and will be ignored or laughed at. The system has brainwashed everyone and unless the citizen of our country rise up soon, our generation will suffer more from a similar predicament we live in at this moment. We can't allow that to happen and it is our duties and rights to know what is really going on and how things are run in our country.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Message-From-the-Universe:-Planning-for-Success&id=9756882

The Definitive Habits For Success

To live an abundant life, you should know that there are some definitive habits for success which you could use. These habits are a shared trait I see among the most successful people and are as much of a formula as they are an outcome. While some are simple, others require discipline and persistence.

But what is a habit and how can it be described? What are these influential behaviors from the successful? And how could you learn them so you can make them your own?

A habit is something you do over and over, through repetition, until it becomes unconsciously part of who you are and how others look at you. When you develop particular habits that are quite crucial, it always has a positive impact on your life, personal and professional.

Therefore, this set of definitive habits can affect the amount of success you can have. One of these behaviors is all about being aware of your thoughts. It may sound corny, but it is a real fact. Your thoughts are powerful. People who are continually successful are always mindful of what they are thinking, regardless of their circumstances.

Success seems hard to attain, but it is not if you are ready to make an effort to replace certain habits with better ones. The shift in your conduct will begin to change you as you adopt these definitive habits in your life. You will think more profoundly and objectively while being on your way to success. You will start to understand that taking risks or failing is part of the process to get where you want.

"Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly." - Robert F. Kennedy

Be Mindful of Fixed Habits 

While definitive habits help increase your rate of success, some of the fixed conduct you might have can deteriorate your path to prosperity. For example, common knowledge dictates that to make money, you need to squirrel it away in a bank while waiting for it to grow. That approach drastically reduces your chances of ever being successful someday if you do not invest it in some way.

There are also destructive habits which refer to using credit to consume, spending on vices, having addictions, and buying products or services that do not add value to your life. These behaviors do not offer you any definitive benefits and are rather a financial waste.

Productive habits are those that make or generate you money, can improve your overall well-being, educate you, make you grow and be a better person. The smartest way to build definitive habits is to cultivate them in place of fixed ones, just like a garden which, in turn, makes success blossom.

The Definitive Habits and their Effective Benefits 

However, the benefits of practicing the definitive habits of the 'successful' might not always be the answer to solve all of your problems, but it will give you the strength to face them and find the solution.

Making Better Decisions 

Each of us has preconceived notions fixed and wired into our minds, and they often cause us to make incorrect and inappropriate decisions. Sometimes, it is not easy to decide or to stay away from something we prefer.

Yet, healthy, confident and definitive habits can help you to develop more refined views as a result of self-discipline. These behaviors can help you see and think more objectively about your circumstances. So, you can make better decisions.

Being More Productive 

At times, there is some confusion in our minds. We spend time being busy or doing unnecessary things, and it is because we do not often have appropriate lucidity. But with these fruitful and definitive habits, it provides you with a better judgment as to what is significant and enables you to filter out what is left.

Once filtered, it is easier to work on what is more essential, and you become more productive. It means that you can identify tasks which are important to you and outsource the ones that are simple and boring to someone else who will turn them into something advantageous for you. This way, everything can be more productive.

The Definitive Habits and their Positive Influence 

The positive effect of successful people's definitive habits makes you more enjoyable to be around and also happier. The reason being is that the purpose of any success in life is to be able to touch and affect others positively.

Practicing these successful behaviors gives you the ability to be able to help yourself your loved ones and others in need as it makes you more compassionate. In turn, it provides you with a positive influence over most. When you start incorporating these definitive habits in your life, and people see the positive impact it has brought you, they may begin embracing these behaviors also.

The Power of These Absolute Habits 

The power of these ultimate habits for success does not only make an impact in your professional life but in your personal life as well. It helps you grow and develop into a great warrior and achieve what you want. These practices influence every single aspect of your life and will direct you on the road to success.

We could all use a bit of sunshine in our lives. But as I said it earlier, these definitive habits all start with being more your thoughts to make sure that they are optimistic and productive. It is imperative to block any negativity from entering your mind. You have to repeat habits that will make you successful and happy. So what are those successful habits?

"Successful people are simply those with successful habits." - Brian Tracy

The Definitive Habits for Success 

The seven definitive habits listed below are the ones you should start integrating into your life and practicing. It does not matter what your incentive is; you have to begin. It is the only way you will ever achieve the success you are looking for.

1. The Definitive Habit of Listening 

You need to listen to the positives, negatives, and unusual people in a room. Learn to listen for the nuggets of data as well as some answers to the essential questions. The habit of listening is like a muscle; it needs to be intentionally applied.

2. The Definitive Habit of Taking Action 

Success is also an action, not just a thought. It is indispensable that you reflect on the ideal outcome, but nothing can be realized without you taking action.

3. The Definitive Habit of Practicing Mindfulness 

Take time to reflect on things daily. And try to regulate your emotions by talking with those who support you. Exercise, meditate, watch something positive, or read.

4. The Definitive Habit of Going beyond Expectations 

It is one the most crucial ways to create trust, form and build relationships, and make or win deals. Going beyond expectations can be a simple thing such as self-discipline by showing up five or ten minutes early. The definitive habit is to make sure you always go beyond the expectation you fixed.

5. The Definitive Habit of Asking Questions 

When you ask questions, you gain a bigger understanding of the vision or discussion. You have to ask the right questions which helps find a solution to dialogue. Always stop for a moment and ask questions before jumping to conclusions or think of an instant answer. You get a better and more successful result.

6. The Definitive Habit of Following Intuition 

Your mind offers information and evidence while your heart provides understanding and feelings. Learn to listen to your heart to follow natural choices and spread acts of compassion. It is a powerful weapon and a definitive habit to have.

7. The Definitive Habit of Giving 

When you give, you get back. Paying it forward or giving to others provides you with things that you cannot get by winning. If you make it a particular habit to teach what you know and train others, you achieve, in fact, more mastery over the knowledge you share.

Now, use these behaviors to your advantage. Know that it will push and force you to outline your definition of being successful and develop habits to accomplish it. So, make an effort and slowly add these definitive habits in your daily life, and you will reap their benefits on the road to success.

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No One Said Success Would Be Easy

When it comes down to it, no one ever said success would be easy, but if anyone did, it would be a lie. In reality, there exist no shortcuts or casual paths to succeed, no matter the value or meaning of the things you want. Yet, some people still believe they can find a loophole and get a stress-free ride.

Are you determined enough to be successful even when things are terrible? Are you someone who gives up the instant you hit a wall? Or are you the one that fights and discover an opportunity to turn that obstacle into a stepping stone to success? Are you willing to crawl just to keep moving forward?

I understand that many of us become frustrated and disappointed with the working world. As you grow up, it is an enormous disenchantment to realize that most of what you are taught by your relatives or peers about success is not the real facts.

You learn that you should just work hard at whatever job you get, and you can succeed. But when you are working hard at a position where you build someone else's dream instead of yours, or your boss does not appreciate your efforts, you are getting no satisfaction or fulfillment.

I am not trying to push you to get a business on your own but to find a better avenue for your future. If you desire to be successful, then you have to begin preparing your mind to realize that success is not going to be an easy stroll through the park.

The Peaks and Valleys of Success 

First, success comes with loving what you do. And like any admiring, it often means being passionate and persistent to accomplish your dreams. Set-backs, barriers, and failures will always be a part of any success and victory. You need to know it is all of those peaks and valleys that make success so rewarding and prodigious.

"Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm." - Winston Churchill

In second, be attentive to your mindset because sometimes, it can become the main obstacle to your success. Your mind may come to tell you that you are not able to reach the goals you have set for yourself. And it especially happens when you stand in the midst of times of trouble.

The Tangible Term of Success 

The moment that defines success is when you realize what type of warrior you really are. There is more to success than what meets the eye. Understand it is not only working hard because if it were, but millions of people around the world would also be much more successful than they are now.

Are you working for someone else? If yes, think about the investment of time and energy you are giving to someone else's dream. You are building their vision, not yours. Of course, the definition of success is different for each of us. So, be aware of what your extraordinary efforts can get you in the long run.

If you do not obtain some benefits from driving your energy into your job, then it is time to reflect. Success should not be to exhaust yourself if all that investment on your part does not translate into some tangible achievement. It is non-sense to donate every waking moment to your job if you still get a miserable raise at the end.

The Ingredients of Success 

The ingredients you always need to have for the journey to success are many but let sum up to the most important ones. These components can take you further than any other qualities. You need the power that no matter what, you keep going and conquer any obstacles in your way.

"If you're going through hell, keep going." - Winston Churchill

Ingredient of Success - Persistence 

When you can put your mind to something and are willing to do whatever it takes, success can only follow. But you need a lot of patience, put in tons of time and often adjust your strategy to get there.

                                         

It is where you have to apply the "10 times rule," from a great entrepreneur of our time, which is to expect ten times more than what you initially thought or calculated.

Ingredient of Success - Process 

The process is a part of success. You cannot dwell on each setback or failure along with your journey, as they are merely stepping-stones to make you move forward and avoid the same mistake. Try to see them as lessons that shape who you are as you go.

Ingredient of Success - Fearlessness 

Stop asking for easy ways or shortcuts, and break your belief that every successful people were born that way. The reality is that every successful person is fearless and ambitious. Fearlessness and boldness are components you should get more interested in.

Ingredient of Success - Courage 

At times, moments of setback, loss, failure, and concern will come along the way. So when they do, make an effort to nourish your courage rather than fueling your fears. Parts of your journey to success will be hellish and challenging, but there is the only thing that makes it worse, and it is giving up.

Ingredient of Success - Vision 

To be successful in everything you do and in life, you will need to have the vision to see it through. It means that you might have to battle, run, walk, and even crawl before you can fly. But if you have the drive and the willpower, not only will you win, but you will achieve success.

No one said success was going to be easy, but it is not impossible if you have the right mindset and understand, imagine, accept and overcome the challenges along your path to victory.

The Magic Ingredient of Success 

Forget the good fortune of coming from a wealthy family, or having an excellent education in school as an element for success but instead realize that believing in yourself is the magic ingredient for it. Self-belief associated with sheer determination is what success and fulfillment are made of.

"Champions keep playing the game until they get it right." - Billie Jean King

So, if you want to become a champion in your life, in anything you undertake or in your calling, keep moving forward. Learn to keep playing the game until you win, no matter what adversities you face. It is the only way you will ever achieve success!

Success Is Not Easy 

Now, you can see that there is more to success than just hard work. And remember that if you decide to be an entrepreneur, you will likely become a leader. So the qualities to inspire others, as well as your determination and belief in what you are doing, will be the critical elements to your personal growth and success.

Remember also another important point! There will be days where your actions will be big ones, while other days, even doing your best will bring only very little. My advice is to keep moving forward with persistence until you reach success.

You are the captain of your ship called life, so you decide which way to sail. And if, on your journey to success, you have to battle, run, walk or even crawl, make sure that you care about what impact you make on others. So keep moving forward, and success will follow.

http://ezinearticles.com/?No-One-Said-Success-Would-Be-Easy&id=9822624

Something Missing In Your Life? (By Tim Connor)

No one in life has or gets everything they want, need or desire. Let me repeat - no one. Are you waiting for some desire or need to be fulfilled? Just had one satisfied? None of these? All of these? Boy, could I go on for pages with this stuff, but we both have better things to do so let me cut to the chase.

You can't have everything in life you want but you can have something - you can have more.

As the years pass for me I have had to let go of many dreams but many of them were replaced with new ones and I'm sure many of the new ones will one day have to be left behind - so what's the point of desires, wants, dreams, goals, wishes etc.? They give us a reason to get up every day. They inspire our effort, creativity, hope and yes even our purpose for living.

You may not have your health or the love of your life or your dream home or even your dream job but let me ask you - do you have a roof over your head? Do you have people in your life who care? Do you have a career, business or even a job? I won't belabor many of the negative statistics but give you just two - there are over 150 million orphans and homeless people in the world. Every day over 10,000 people in the world die of starvation.

So, let me ask you again - what's missing in your life? What do you need to feel whole, alive, real, passionate, worthwhile or even just alive? Better income? More friends? Better health? Bigger house? Better car? This list is endless.

Here's another question for you - if what's missing in your life was satisfied or given to you today would that be the end of your search or would you now need something else, something better, something different? Want a bet? Yep, something else (new/different/better) would now be the focus of your next need and again and again and again until when? Well, until you think you have everything you want or need (never going to happen) or when you're dead or even deserve.

Last year due to complications of hip surgery I almost died. Then within a few weeks I had to have open heart surgery because of the complications. Trust me - I'm happy just still being here and writing this article and heading towards my next speaking engagement next week.

Would I like a better car? Yep. Nicer digs? Yep. More money in the bank? Yep. More and better vacations? Yep. Heard enough? Yep. But let me ask you - what really matters to you when push comes to shove? Or are you so spoiled or "selfie oriented" that you will never be happy till you have it all, more, better or even less?

Let me close with a simple concept if you are still with me.

If something is missing in your life and you knew for a fact that you would never achieve it, get it, have it, own it or - whatever... would you pack it in and call it quits? I doubt it. What you would do? You would finally be happy with what you have, who you are, where you are, where you are going and what you are doing.

Cause you know what? Some day for you and for me - the journey of having will be over forever.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Something-Missing-In-Your-Life?&id=9757920

Ride the Wave: Hawaii 5-0's Surprising Lesson in Thankfulness (By Dr. Noelle Nelson)

Just the other night, I was watching one of my favorite TV shows, "Hawaii 5-0," where one of the main characters featured in that night's episode was a young woman, a veteran, who'd served in Afghanistan, during which time she'd lost both legs. The show was forthright in its brief portrayal of some of the tough challenges such vets can face: depression, falling into substance abuse to alleviate the physical and mental anguish, homelessness.

But the clincher, for me, was to see this young woman, who (in the story) had been a surfing champion before her service, find the courage (with help from one of the show's regulars) to ride the waves again--in her bikini on a board equipped with special hand-holds so she could "stand" proud and true, on the little bit that was left of her upper legs. She was a surfer once again.

I still cry when I think of it. Not only because I think the show is to be commended for its refusal to hide the character's disability, but because it brought home to me vividly, that every one of our lives matter and have meaning. Disabled lives, black lives, vet lives, transgender lives, homeless lives, children's lives, white lives, Native American lives, immigrant lives, and all the other lives too numerous to mention. No matter what label or category you prefer to use to describe yourself ("Other" is my personal favorite), the truth is that all our lives are important.

You matter. You count. You are important. And so is everyone else in your world. In this season, where thankfulness is the order of the day, I want to be thankful for all those in my world. I want to remember, when someone annoys me, or does something differently than I would, or makes me downright mad, that, as my friend Mike Dooley so wisely says: "People are always doing the best they can, with what they've got, from where they are." Regardless of what anyone else thinks of how they're going about things. Those are powerful words to remember.

That includes you, and me. And everyone else. To look at oneself and others as doing the best they can in that moment is humbling. It kicks in my compassion, my patience, and reminds me to try to understand others, rather than knee-jerk into criticism or blame.

And for that, I am deeply, truly thankful.

http://ezinearticles.com/?Ride-the-Wave:-Hawaii-5-0s-Surprising-Lesson-in-Thankfulness&id=9563908