It appears that often, most of us are giving up way too easily when it comes to make a change or create something new in our lives. We begin by getting excited and captivated, but when we come across obstacles that are in our way, we decide to let our emotions get the best of us and give up.
Why does it happen? Why do people give up on things dear to their heart? Why have you given up on some of your dreams?
At the start, you get excessively happy to pursue a goal. You are even enthusiastic about it. You believe that it is something worth doing, something you want to master but after a while, when the euphoric emotions start to fade away, you often feel disappointed and walk away from the all thing.
This topic is a subject that takes me to heart! It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure why most people call it quit way so easily. Typically, it is often because their goal gets too hard or it just takes too long. Unfortunately, people have all kinds of pretexts for giving in after a couple of failures.
But failure is a part of the process to success and is going to happen no matter what you do. You are always going to encounter walls, barriers, obstacles. It is normal in the beginning to be inexperienced or clueless about what you are doing.
"Every master was once a beginner, and every pro began as an amateur" - Robin Sharma
The Need to Face Your Difficulties
You should realize that obstacles in your way will not vanish, but you can get ready for them. You can prepare to overcome these walls, barriers, obstacles and even the doubts you have. As you progress, you get to learn more, practice more, and build more commitment towards your goal which in turn prepares you even better for difficulties that may arise.
Often, when you are facing problems, your emotions get in the way and try to take control. These feelings are not helping you to achieve the success you desire. During those times, you do not see the prospect of the long-term rewards because these protecting reactions only care about the present and not the future.
The primary cause people do not get what they desire is because they give up way too soon. Success may have been around the corner. Have you given up on things before? If you are anything that is human, you probably did.
At some point in life, we all packed it up and walked away. Do you remember the times where you have decided or tried something and then quit when it became too hard? How many times have you put off taking action until later, because you felt like it was not the right time?
The fact of the matter is that many of us give up far too rapidly! So, why do most people give up so easily? Here are my top 17 pretexts which people are using when giving up. I added a tip to each reason to get around it.
1. Lack of Determination
Understand that by having a lack of determination, all you worked so hard for will be gone the instant you choose to give up. You have control over this kind of decision. No one can do it for you or give you this willpower.
It is your duty to finish what you've started. If you can persist, be consistent, carry on with your efforts, and do not give up, you will inevitably arrive where you want.
2. Unbelief in Your Abilities
At one point in your life, someone close to you told you that you could not do it, and you did believe those words. Next time a person says such thing, begin to read biographies of people who have succeeded against all the odds knowing that such words have no power whatsoever.
The ultra-marathoner David Goggins has a video which is very inspirational. If you have never seen it, you should watch it. Do not worry; I will be here when you have finished.
3. Someone Else's Goal
If you ever work for someone else or had goals chosen by relatives for you, you know what I am talking about. These targets that are not yours! It is tough to keep being motivated if you feel that this is not your purpose in life.
You need to choose your own goals, take possession of them and act.
4. Life is Already Good
You should realize that the better your life, the more you feel tempted to let things the way they are. You might think that your life is good enough, so you settle, and give up on going further.
Let me tell you that no matter how good your life now is, it can always improve. Therefore, next time you feel like settling or stagnating, think about the facets of your life you dislike and focus on cultivating them.
5. Not Desire to Put Time in
Do not underestimate the time it takes to complete specific goals because you then get overwhelmed and have no desire to put the required time in.
You do not need more time; you just need to use it more efficiently. Focus on your priorities which are the most important things first. Use the Pareto Principle and spend 80% of your time on what will get you the most results, instead of just looking busy.
6. No Self-Confidence
When making changes or starting something new, you need self-belief, self-confidence. If there are any doubts about your abilities to succeed, you will have the desire to want to give up.
When I need a boost in my self-confidence, I close my eyes, take a deep breath and recall all of my skills, experiences, knowledge, as well as other assets I have.
7. Not Wanting to Do the Hard Work
The road to success is everything but an easy one. In adding to the issue of time, the difficulty comes into play. As soon as something is getting harder than you thought, it can be discouraging but know that the goals you should be most proud of are usually the most challenging.
If something is harder than you thought, it is time to work harder than you should. Strengthen and cultivate the abilities you need to progress so that over time, things will get easier.
8. Absence of Focus
What keep you from focusing nowadays are all the many distractions you have, which takes your time away from aiming at the important stuff! Social Media is an excellent example of that! The absence of focus leads to unproductive efforts which incline you to quit.
Create time by switching off or logging off social media sites and turn off your phone's notifications. This way, you will stay focused on the task at hand.
9. Interruptions
Interruptions and distractions might be coming by way of other people, television, phone or noise. You should know that it is impossible to jump from one goal to another, as you never feel or find that you are making any progress forward.
You should avoid any interruptions by finding a place where you will be in peace. Work on one thing at a time. Efficiency is the key here.
10. No Immediate Results
Today, everyone is a hurry to get instant gratification. But remember that anything worthwhile creating takes much time, and each flower needs time to blossom.
The more you work towards your goals; day in and day out, the earlier you will achieve them.
11. Very Little Reward
By working so hard and put in all that time, you thought you would have better outcomes. You get disappointed because your goal does not transform into the desired results. A lot of people give up easily when it feels like they are working hard for nothing.
You have to set mini milestones along your path and bit by bit you will see the rewards. Success will not come overnight to transform your life. As in any sport or as for any athlete, you need to train and practice to master.
12. No Enthusiasm or Inspiration
As you start making a change or creating something new, you feel full of enthusiasm and you are inspired and motivated. Then these feelings start to wear off, and you realize it is not that easy. Your inspiration fades away, and you just abandon.
Just think about your end goal, and remember why you are doing this. Remember what inspired you about your objective and put emphasis on those features.
13. Habits are Difficult to Change
Getting started is not always the hard part. The awkward phase is often getting rid of your habits or lifestyle, and to replace them. Changing a pattern is not an easy thing to do. There is also the fear of a new habit and the appeal of an old one.
You have to focus on your progress, not perfection. Realize that falling back sometime into old patterns is a normal reaction. Personal change is like taking two steps forward and one step back. What is crucial is to keep momentum to move forward.
14. Not Worth the Effort
Perhaps you had an idea but realized that it was just a short wish. You then understood that it was not worth the effort, the sacrifices or that you are going in the wrong direction.
Revisit and evaluate your goals, and if they are no longer what you want, then it is not giving up. Know that you were born a winner!
15. Scared of Leaving the Comfort Zone
Even if things in your life may not have been perfect before, you felt comfortable with them. It was a comfortable and easy routine. But in leaving your comfort zone to get into a world of doubt and struggles, you miss it.
You should only know that without leaving your comfort zone, there won't be any growth or progress and that once you have obtained what you want, you will be able to go even further.
16. A Ridiculous Idea
People think you are too old to begin all over and start something new. They believe that following your dream is not a realistic concept, or they believe it to be a childish fantasy.
Well, what people think is their problem. It is your life and your future. So choose wisely!
17. It Should Be Easy
You think it should be easy but when things are not running as they should, you quit, and so no more effort is required. You just give up, and the problems related to that go away. Easy does it!
The minute you start something, surround yourself with and talk to people who encourage you and are interested in your success.
A Final Word on Giving Up
The one important thing that sets successful people apart from the people who do not is their capacity to persist, keep going even after failure and never give up.
My final suggestion to you is that sometime, you may have to lock yourself in a room and scream at with all your strength. Do it until you get it out of your system. Then move on and get back to work.
Know also that your current circumstances are not the final outcomes.
A great thing about not giving up is that it a skill you can acquire. Be patient enough and do not be discouraged by the lack of instant results. A lot of people are using the above excuses and give up way too easily. Just decide that you're not going to quit. And instead be unstoppable!
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