Visualizing a Better Self-Image

Improving our self-image may seem like a daunting task at first. How do we overcome years of negative reinforcement that has convinced us we are not skinny enough, smart enough, or rich enough? How do we reverse our belief that we don't possess the characteristics needed to become successful? We have to change what we think of ourselves, literally.

Where did our negative self-image come from exactly? Our subconscious minds believe what we tell them. Especially during our formative years, we may have been taught to see ourselves in a negative light. Anyone who has gone through high school knows the pressures our peers put on us with regard to dress, social behavior, and academics. Add to that criticism from teachers and parents, unrealistic portrayals of beauty and success in the media, and it's easy to see why we feel we're not good enough.

But it doesn't stop there, does it? What begins as an external influence then becomes internal as we pick up the trend of negativity and berate ourselves with negative self-talk. We call ourselves stupid, hopeless, or a failure. We try to force ourselves into an impossible cookie-cutter mold of what we think we should be. We berate ourselves for not being good enough, strong enough, beautiful enough, and successful enough.

Over time, this results in a negative self-image that can prove difficult to change. Difficult, but not impossible! There are tools available to help us turn it around, and one of those is creative visualization.

Creative visualization is a process that can replace our negative beliefs with positive ones. This process does not happen overnight, but neither did the development of our negative self-image. The key to creative visualization is to stay consistent with the practice. The goal is to prevent new negative thoughts from entering the subconscious, while eliminating the ones already present.

Implementing creative visualization is simple. First, find a quiet, safe place where you can sit, or lie down, for an uninterrupted period of time. You may choose to create a soothing atmosphere by lighting candles and incense, or putting on some relaxing music.

Take a few minutes to do some slow, deep breathing and release all stress from your body and mind. Close your eyes and visualize your true self, the "you" you are deep down inside. See yourself as a strong, beautiful, vital creation of God, glowing with light, love, and happiness. Really zoom in and see yourself in glorious detail. Don't allow negative thoughts to enter your head and tell you it isn't possible. Simply push those thoughts aside gently and know that if you can see it mentally, you can create it in your physical reality.

Take your time with this exercise, and make an effort to do it at least once daily, preferably twice. At the same time, begin making a concentrated effort to turn your negative self-talk into positive self-talk. Praise yourself, encourage yourself, build yourself up with your thoughts and words.

Be patient! Remember that it took years to build up your negative self-image, so you can expect it to take time to replace it with a more positive one. But because you are going about it in a purposeful, conscious way, your results will be much more powerful.

Consistently imagining yourself as you want to be will create a new "truth" in your subconscious, and as your mind replaces the negative with the positive, you will begin to see the shift in yourself. A new, more confident you will emerge, giving you the courage to succeed at whatever you desire.

http://www.successconsciousness.com/guest_articles/self_image.htm

12 Tips to Overcome Laziness

      

What is laziness?

It is the desire to be idle, to do nothing and resist effort.

It is a state of passivity and of letting things stay as they are.

Sometimes, we enjoy being a little lazy, such as after working hard for several hours, or on a very cold or warm day, but if this state occurs too often, something has to be done about it.

In order to carry out our chores, work efficiently, live to the fullest, and achieve success, we must learn how to overcome laziness.

Simple tips for overcoming laziness:

1) Break down a task into smaller tasks

We often avoid tasks because we find them too big, too overwhelming, too tiring, or taking too much of our time.

Breaking a task into several smaller tasks can solve this problem. Then, each one will not seem so difficult or intimidating. Instead of having one big task, we will have a series of small tasks, which do not require too much effort.

This approach can be applied not only to tasks, but also to goals and everything else we have or need to do. This will tend to melt much of the laziness and inner resistance we often experience.

2) Rest, sleep and exercise

In some cases, laziness is due to being tired and lacking energy. If this is true in your case, you need to give yourself the rest and sleep you need, and also give your body enough exercise and fresh air.

3) Motivation

In some cases, the reason for laziness is due to lack of motivation. You can strengthen your motivation through affirmations, visualization and thinking about the importance of performing your task or chore or achieving your goal.

4) Have a vision of what and who you want to be

Frequently reflecting on the person we want to be, the goals we want to achieve, and the life we want to live, can motivate us to act.

5) Think about benefits

Think about the benefits you will gain if you overcome your laziness and take action, instead of thinking about the difficulties or obstacles. Focusing on the difficulties of the task or action lead to discouragement, avoidance of taking action and to laziness. It is important that you focus your mind and attention on the benefits, not on the difficulties.

6) Thinking about the consequences

Think about what will happen, if you succumb to laziness, and don't perform your task or chore. Thinking about the consequences, if you do not act, can also push you to take action.

7) Doing one thing at a time

Focus on doing one thing at a time. If you feel you have a lot to do, you will probably feel overwhelmed and let laziness overcome you, instead of you overcoming laziness.

8) Visualisation

Your imagination has a great influence on your mind, habits and action. Visualize yourself performing the task easily, energetically and enthusiastically. Do so before starting with a task or goal, and also when you feel lazy, or when your mind whispers to you to abandon what you are doing.

9) Repeat affirmations

Tell yourself:

"I can accomplish my goal."

"I have the energy and motivation to act and do whatever I want or have to do."

"Doing things makes me stronger."

"Doing things makes things happen."

10) Regards a task as an exercise

Consider each task as an exercise to make you stronger, more decisive and more assertive.

11) Procrastination

Avoid procrastination, which is a form of laziness. If there is something you have to do, why not do it right now and get through with it? Why let it stay nagging at the back of your head?

12) Learn from successful people

Watch successful people, and how they do not let laziness win. Learn from them, talk with them and associate with them.

Overcoming the habit of laziness is achieved through a series of daily actions and activities, when you choose to act, instead of remaining passive. Every time you overcome your laziness you get stronger. Every time you choose to act, you increase your ability to win, achieve goals and improve your life.

http://www.successconsciousness.com/overcoming-laziness.htm

Stress Management Tips for Managing Stress

Stress consumes your time and energy and weakens your immune system. It causes restlessness, unhappiness, impatience and anger. It can harm your life, ambitions, relationships and health. There is no doubt that it would be much better to live without it.

There are various methods to reduce, control and manage stress. Some stress management techniques may suit some people, and other techniques may suit other people.

In my opinion, one of the best methods for stress management is meditation. It exerts a calming effect on the body, nerves and blood pressure, reduces restlessness, and brings peace of mind, detachment and equanimity.

In order to experience the benefits of meditation, you have to meditate everyday. The problem is that not everyone has the discipline, willpower and desire to meditate, even when realizing the benefits of meditation.

Since this is a short article, I don't intend to analyze the reasons for stress, neither describe the technics for stress management. I only want to suggest a few simple tips to help you reduce stress.

It is not always possible to eliminate the reasons for the stress, but it is possible to act and behave in certain ways that can reduce it. You cannot always control the conditions of your life and circumstances, but you can learn to choose not to be influenced by them too much.

The following tips for stress management serve as first aid against stress. They will not prevent it altogether, but they can reduce or alleviate it.

Tips for stress management:

1. When you feel stress is building up within you, if possible, stop what you are doing and take a short walk.
2. When stressed, drink some water or sweet juice.
3. When under stress, take a few slow deep breaths.
4. Eat some food you like, because food calms down restlessness and nervousness.
5. Listen to melodious, relaxing music or songs.
6. Do something that you like doing.
7. Watch a funny movie or program.
8. Repeat relaxing affirmations (positive statements) for a few minutes, aloud or silently, such as:
   "My mind is getting calm."
   "I am relaxed and happy."
   "I can meet any situation with calmness and inner strength."
   "Everything is going to turn out great."
   "I feel how my body, feelings and mind are getting calmer.
9. Think, and persuade yourself about the futility of stress, and how much it is better to live without it.
10. Do not to allow other people's opinions, words and actions affect you. You can do so, if you keep trying. You can develop this ability by learning emotional detachment.
11. Exercise your body regularly in any kind of sport.

You can manage stress if you put your mind to it.

This requires some effort and time on your part, but the rewards are great.

Follow the tips, and remember that the more peaceful your mind becomes, the less stress you experience. The more inner peace you possess, the less anxiety, stress and fear you experience. Browse through the website, and you will find how to take the first steps to inner peace and stress-free life.

http://www.successconsciousness.com/stress_management_tips.htm

Accelerated Learning: How To Get Good at Anything in 20 Hours

What is Anger and How to Overcome It

Anger comes out as a response to feelings of dissatisfaction, frustration and unhappiness, which usually arise, when we dislike a person, an object or a situation.

It usually appears when we are unable to fulfill our wishes and desires, or when we are forced to do something we dislike doing or we would rather avoid. In such situations, the mind reacts by feeling unhappy and stressed, which leads to anger.

Day-to-day life confronts us with many situations, which can produce anger:

• Your partner, children or friends, often, say or do things that you don't like.
• You want to make yourself a cup of coffee, but discover that you run out of coffee.
• You arrive late to the station, and find that the bus or train has already left.
• You might need to talk to someone, whom you don't like.
• Your plans might not turn out as you wish they would.

All these, and other similar situations, can cause anger. The question is, do you have to react automatically or can you change your reaction and avoid anger? The truth is that you can learn to react differently

Anger is a most negative reaction, and should be avoided as much as possible, if you wish to progress on the path of self improvement. You cannot avoid all the situations that cause anger, however, with some training, you can learn to change your reactions and attitude. You can teach yourself not to get angry.

You need to be aware of the situations that could lead to anger, and be alert enough when you experience them.

You can overcome anger, but this requires some inner work. You don't have to react automatically, you can learn to act consciously and control your reactions.

8 Simple Tips to Overcome Anger

1. When you feel uncomfortable and unhappy, stop what you are doing and visualize some pleasant mental scene from the past. Think of something that made you happy.
2. When you feel that you are getting angry, breathe a few deep breaths. This will delay the anger and calm you down.
3. Count slowly from one to ten. This will delay your angry reaction and weaken it.
4. During your spare time, think about what anger leads to, and how worthwhile it is to avoid it.
5. When feeling angry, drink some water. This has a calming effect on the body, emotions and the mind.
6. Strive to be patient in your day-to-day life. As you become more patient, you will be slower to anger
7. One of the best remedies to anger is emotional detachment. When you are emotionally detached you cannot get angry.
8. Another way to avoid anger is to develop the habit of peace of mind. This orequires some training, but is most worthwhile skill.

http://www.successconsciousness.com/overcoming_anger.htm

The Procrastination Problem

Procrastinators delay until the day after tomorrow what they know they should have done the day before yesterday.

What does procrastination look like?

We all put off working on unpleasant or tedious tasks from time to time. Washing the car, taking out garbage, cleaning windows, or making stressful phone calls are no one's idea of a fun way to spend time. But where most of us do this only occasionally, procrastinators do it most of the time, and that's where the problems start.

Procrastination is a stress factor

Procrastination is a behavior that leads to stress, because it makes plans and wishes fail at what should be the point of fulfillment: theater tickets and vacation packages sell out before procrastinators get around to calling. Planes take off, deadlines pass, jobs go to other applicants--the ones who got their resumes in on time.

Procrastination has negative effects

The Procrastination Research Group at Carleton University in Canada did an online survey. They received 2,700 responses to the question, "To what extent is procrastination having a negative impact on your happiness?" Almost one person in two (46%) said "quite a bit" or "very much," and around one person in five (18%) reported an "extreme negative effect."

Procrastination threatens happiness

Though procrastination is often trivialized, procrastinators suffer when their careers crash or when they otherwise fail to reach their potential. Long term and wide scale, "the big P" can become more than just a threat to personal health, happiness, and productivity of individuals: it can carry that threat into our companies and communities.

Traits of the procrastinators

How can you spot a chronic procrastinator? Procrastinators avoid revealing information about their abilities, they make poor time estimates, they tend to focus on the past and do not act on their intentions, they may also prefer service jobs. These characteristics are linked to low self-esteem, perfectionism, non-competitiveness, self-deception, self-control, self-confidence, depression and anxiety.

There are no easy answers

There are no easy "buck up" answers, though. As Joseph Ferrari, professor of psychology at DePaul University in Chicago says: "It's not about time management. To tell a chronic procrastinator to 'Just Do It' is like telling a clinically depressed person to cheer up." We need to look at the kind of procrastination people practice to understand the reason they do it and find the appropriate cure.

Why do people procrastinate?

Take your pick! Ferrari found that some procrastinators had particularly authoritarian fathers. He sees the p-habit as a continuing rebellion against those demands. Others lay the blame on strong parents who don't leave their children room to develop initiative. Clary Lay of York University, Toronto, creator of the General Procrastination Scale, takes a different tack and believes that procrastinators think and act in terms of "wishes and dreams" while people who do not procrastinate get on with "oughts and obligations." He says, "Procrastinators are also neurotically disorganized in their thinking, making them forgetful and less likely to plan well."

How do people procrastinate?

Procrastination research is a new field, but researchers are starting to describe different types of procrastination. Two types that are particularly common are behavioral- and decisional procrastination.

Behavioural procrastination

Behavioural procrastination is a self-sabotage strategy that allows people to shift blame and avoid action, for example: a student may do poorly in an exam and use procrastination as an excuse. "They'd rather create the impression that they lacked effort than ability," says Ferrari. "They can blame their failure on the lack of time."

Ferrari also thinks that procrastinators suffer from low esteem and self-doubt and worry about how other people judge their abilities. "Procrastinators view their self-worth as based on ability," he says. So according to their logic, "If I never finish the task, you can never judge my ability."

Prolonged procrastination and failure to perform adequately creates a cycle of self-defeating behavior, which results in a downward spiral of self-esteem. Self-inflicted degradation and shame of this kind often translates into stress and (mental) health problems at some point.

Decisional procrastination

The decisional procrastination strategy is to put off making a decision when dealing with conflicts or choices. People who practice high level decisional procrastination tend to be afraid of errors and are likely to be perfectionists. These procrastinators seek out more and more information about alternatives before attempting to make a decision, if they make one at all.

Over informed decisional procrastinators run the danger of falling prey to a further self-sabotage strategy, called optional paralysis: they create so many choices for themselves that they feel unable to choose, for fear of choosing an option that is less than perfect.

First steps to change

Insight is the first step to change. Understanding is the second step. After that, a course of behavior modification therapy may help, especially if procrastination is causing serious problems in connection with work and relationships. Though there is no Band-Aid solution for procrastination, anything that helps procrastinators take concrete steps goes a long way to re-building a healthy level of achievement and self-esteem and helping them feel better about themselves.

http://www.successconsciousness.com/guest_articles/procrastination.htm

3 Lies You Need To Stop Telling Yourself About The Future

The desire to receive guidance for a better future has been around since recorded history. Oracles — individuals gifted with the ability to receive insight and direction from beyond — have always existed and often been revered in society. More and more today, however, people are beginning to tap into the intuitive abilities that we all have to tap into spiritual truths.

In working with people to hone their intuitive abilities and trust their own guidance, I typically find that the reason people feel doubt about their lives has less to do with their intuitive skills and more with myths about what spiritual guidance is and how it can guide us to some ideal future.

The following three myths are stumbling blocks that keep us believing falsehoods about how to make decisions for the future, thereby keeping us from believing in our intuitive gifts. Identify them. Understand them — and their shortcomings — and you'll be better able to tap into own your skills and ambitions for the life you want to create.

1. "If you're following your inner guidance, everything will flow easily."

Some teachers will tell you that it's only when you're "in the flow" that you're in alignment with your true purpose and direction. Yet some of the most clear and direct guidance I have received has included, "Move your family to Indonesia" and "Leave your relationship." While these moves indeed created some of the most profound and poignant moments in my life, they were also just as filled with incredible difficulty and emotional upheaval. Things were certainly not "flowing," but I definitely think I was following my internal compass. Following your inner guidance doesn't always mean smooth sailing.

Imagine for a moment you went to a movie and in the first 30 minutes the good guy defeated the bad guys, won over his love interest, made a ton of money and rode off into the sunset. You'd be bored. A story is only interesting because of what someone over comes and works through — so too is life.

2. "Do what you love and money will follow."

This could be considered as a corollary to the first myth but it deserves its own space because most people want their guidance to include a guarantee of financial success or at least safety of some kind. If financial (or other) security is missing from the equation, people tend to assume they aren't following legitimate guidance.

While the "do what you love and money will follow" mantra sells a lot of books, it's a myth, plain and simple. If you look at most people who have created anything amazing in their lives, their mantra looks more like, "Decide to do what you love but work three part time jobs in the interim, take out a second mortgage on your house, ask friends and family to help out financially …. and then the real money will follow." If you wait around for money to come, you may never follow your dreams.

3. "Inner guidance will show you all the steps you need to take."

I often hear, "I have a strong feeling I need to do X but I don't know how everything will come together to make it all work out."

When you program a destination into the GPS in your car what do you get back? The next move you need to make. We'd all like our internal needs and desires to lay out a neat, GPS-approved plan to show us exactly what we need to do in sequence to get from where we are to where we want to be.

But the truth is we only know what we need to know in each moment we live. This is precisely what allows our lives to unfold instead of following a preordained script. I tend to think of this as less a trick of the Universe and more as a gift in disguise.

If we truly knew what our journey was getting us into many of us might run away from the quest and thereby miss the prize. Likewise just because you might not know where the ladder leads doesn't mean you can't start climbing.

We are all capable of receiving guidance and assistance in our lives, both from within and from others. Just like a muscle, the more you listen, trust and act on your own guidance, the stronger it gets — and the stronger you will get.

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-16647/3-lies-you-need-to-stop-telling-yourself-about-the-future.html

3 Ways Your Spirit Guides Can Help You Find Your True Purpose

The new year can be an exciting time to go in a bold, new direction.

But what if you're feeling lost and aren't sure what that new direction is? If you're unsure about the next step to take in your career, relationship, or other aspect of your life, it can leave you feeling frustrated and unable to move forward.

Seven years ago, I was desperately wanting to have a career that I loved, but I had no clue what I wanted to do. I kept trying different options, but I still didn't feel like I was on the right path.

That's when I decided to ask my Spirit Guides for help. As a medium, I've been communicating with these loving spiritual helpers since I was a child, but I didn't realize they could help me find direction until that stressful time when I felt lost. By following their guidance, I have since created a career that I love and have helped thousands of people get clarity about their lives, too.

If you're feeling lost about your direction as the new year approaches, here are three reminders from your Spirit Guides to help keep you moving forward:

1. You are never lost.

No matter how lost and confused you feel, you are never truly lost. You don't need to know exactly how and when everything will work out. You just need to know the next step.

When I wanted career direction, I knew my next step was to quit the job I was miserable doing. I was too scared to take that step, so I convinced myself that I was lost. Is it possible that your feeling of being lost is really the fear of moving forward?

In this moment, you know everything you need to know to take the next step. Take slow, deep breaths until your mind feels focused, and then ask within, What is the next step? Observe what comes to you. If the answer feels peaceful, then it is from your source of inner guidance. If you feel stressed, fearful, or judged, then your thoughts have interfered. Take a slow, deep breath and try again.

2. Follow your joy.

In every situation, following your joy is the most practical, logical and soul-satisfying decision you can make.

Even though I didn't know how it related to my future career, part of following my joy was joining a singing group at a local church. Being part of that spiritual community made me realize how much I wanted to share messages to help people live their Spirit, which led to my ideal career. It's also where I met my husband. Everything fell into place when I followed my joy.

Whether you feel lost in your career, relationship, or some other area of your life, ask yourself what would bring you joy? If you knew everything would work out perfectly, what would you do?

3. You are powerful.

Sometimes you may know what you want, but yet you feel incapable of achieving it. From my journey and from working with other people, I have learned that most of us feel smaller and less powerful than we actually are.

One day I asked my Spirit Guides what belief I need to overcome, and they said, "Stop believing you're only human. You have unlimited power and potential in each moment."

You are more powerful than your fear of being lost. No obstacle that you face in life is bigger than you are.

By focusing on one step at a time, following your joy, and remembering who you are on a spiritual level, you'll be headed in the right direction for a happy and fulfilling new year!

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-16714/3-ways-your-spirit-guides-can-help-you-find-your-true-purpose.html

THE #WH21DAYCHALLENGE: MEDITATION WEEK 1

This week’s been a big one for me. Until now, I’ve been in the closet when it comes to stress. I’ve worked hard to stay cool in the office – and then taken out my pent-up stress on my boyfriend (sorry).

Few people knew that my head is constantly whirring with anxiety. From lying awake at night stressing about money problems, to biting my nails on the train thinking of all the deadlines I have looming, I’ve had enough of it. I’m ‘coming out’ – and I’m determined to achieve a measure of inner calm to rival my appearance.

Enter the #wh21daychallenge. I’ve tried apps, audio guides and classes and here’s what I've learnt so far, in my first week of daily meditation.

1/ BREATHING IS THE KEY

My first hurdle? Finding time to sit still. With a to-do list as long as my arm I needed to make sure this meditation malarky fits into my schedule. A 10 minute focused breathing sesh before bed seemed a good way to start. Chris Conners, founder of meditation mecca Modcon (moderncoscious.com) suggested giving all my focus to breathing. “Remember how precious your breath is - it is the place between life and death. This helps gain perspective on the stresses of everyday life.”

Here’s how to do it (yup, there’s a special technique):

Breathe in, inhaling deeply and filling your stomach with air. When you exhale your stomach should go in. Sounds simple, but for years I did the opposite.

With that in mind, I sat on my bed and focused on breathing properly. Thoughts still popped in and out of my brain, but I tried my best to brush them off and let my breathing become my main focus. It felt great - and I had a wonderful night’s sleep and woke up feeling full of beans.

2/ YOU CAN MEDITATE ANYWHERE

Finding time to paint my nails seems a challenge at the moment, let alone twenty minutes to meditate, so my train commute was the perfect time to try some guided meditations from iTunes. There’s loads to choose from, and they cost pennies. Win.

Sound-cancelling headphones came in handy – though I do think Boris should consider piping meditation recordings through the tube network. I also slipped out at lunch to the park for a quick meditation. Headphones in, sunglasses on, anyone would think I was just catching some rays.

Tip: Take as little as possible with you. You don’t want to be worrying about someone nicking your bag while you’re in the zone.

3/ EXERCISE HELPS

I took part in a Yoga Flow class followed by Yoga Nidra (yoga sleep) at Good Vibes Studio in Covent Garden. WOW. I felt relaxed from the final namaste until the next morning. “Going straight into stillness is a challenge for urbanites. Our lives are fast-paced and due to our digital ‘on’ culture it takes time to unwind. Flowing yoga gets blood pumping though your muscles and releases tension, while restorative yoga allows our connective tissues to release, so you’re in the perfect state to meditate,” says Nahid De Belgeonne, Good Vibes Founder and WH yoga blogger.

4/ DO YOUR RESEARCH

There are so many ways to meditate it can get confusing. Keep an open mind and try a few techniques. Meeting guru Will Williamson (willwilliamsmeditation.co.uk) has had the biggest impact on me so far.

Previously, I’d been trying to shut down my brain. My first taste of Will’s Vedic Meditation (which promises ‘rest up to five times deeper than sleep’) turned this around. He actually made me actively focus on my thoughts. The focus here is on the brain.

I was told to bring six flowers and three fruits for a ceremony before the mediation. After letting my boyfriend and parents know the address of the session and swearing that I was out of there at the first sight of a sacrificial lamb, I arrived with a bunch of flowers, a mango, a fig and a nectarine.

After the ceremony (I can’t tell you anything about it, but there wasn’t a sacrifice in sight, honest) I was given my very own mantra which I had to repeat in my head for 20 minutes, sitting with my eyes closed. I was then told to try and do so twice a day for twenty minutes – anywhere. On the train, before I go to sleep, even sitting on the toilet at work (not really, boss!)

I’ve been doing this for four days now and it feels amazing. No incense, chakra spray or scented candles needed, just my personal mantra. It creates a sensation of being in the dream-like state between sleep and waking. Strange visualisations pop into my mind and then disappear leaving another thought behind. All you need to do is remember to repeat your mantra.

I’ve been bursting with energy - and all those ridiculous worries? Gone. It can even cure hangovers - 20 minutes repeating my mantra on Sunday morning confirmed it. Result.

4 MORE SIMPLE WAYS TO MASTER MEDITATION

1/ If you’re planning to meditate in the morning have a shower first, or at least splash your face with water. This helps your body and mind distinguish between sleep and meditation.

2/ Avoid looking at your phone before you meditate. The stimulation will mean you take longer to switch off.

3/ Comfortable clothing can help you relax. I recommend Splendid’s cotton active pant or Olivia Von Halle silk pyjamas.

4/ Try not to eat or drink caffeine for two hours before meditation. Your body will be settled which will help you focus.

http://www.womenshealthmag.co.uk/health/sleep/1624/the-wh21daychallenge-meditation-week-1/

5 SIMPLE WAYS TO SWITCH OFF ANXIETY

Anxiety is a big deal. According to the UK Mental Health Foundation, generalised anxiety disorder accounts for 30% of GPs’ mental health case load. There are likely to be many more of us with mild to moderate anxiety, though - we all know someone with a tendency to over-worry about things.
It's certainly the most common issue I see in my hypnotherapy practice and the latest YouGov survey found significantly higher levels of anxiety among women than men.

Anxiety can manifest itself in different ways, from fears and phobias to obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and trichotillomania (hair pulling). The most common is generalised anxiety disorder (GAD), which can be described as being 'chronic worrying' and include things like catastrophising (“He's late, he must have been hit by a car!'), problems with sleep, irritable bowels, and tension in the body. We all feel like this at times, but if it's affecting your life, it's time to take action.

The first step to feeling better is recognising that there is an issue and deciding to do something about it. It's important that if you suspect you have anxiety that you speak to your GP and get it properly diagnosed.
In the meantime, here are a few of my tried and tested, evidence-based techniques to help you to beat anxiety.

1/ THE ART OF DISTRACTION

It may not be a long-term solution, but distracting yourself can dial down the intensity and help break patterns of anxiety. When you first notice anxious thoughts or feelings, tell yourself 'STOP!' and quickly find something else to do. Get on the phone to a friend, go for a run, do some writing or focus on your breathing...

2/ B-R-E-A-T-H-E

Controlled breathing short-circuits anxiety in the brain by activating the parasympathetic nervous system (the opposite of the ‘fight or flight’ response).

Breathe in, watching how your belly expands like a balloon, and let it flatten with the exhalation. Sit comfortably and breathe in for a count of 7 and then out for a count of 11. You can count as fast or as slowly as you like - it's the ratio that is important. Do this for a few minutes or until you feel calm.

3/ REMEMBER: YOUR THOUGHTS ARE NOT FACTS

Just because you think something doesn’t mean it’s true. Anxious thoughts are often irrational or distorted. Worried that someone at work is annoyed with you? If there’s no reason why they would be, recognise that it’s your tendency to think the worst at play.

3/ DEAR DIARY…

Writing things down not only helps you get things in perspective; the physical act of writing also has an effect on the subconscious mind. Try this daily writing exercise. In the morning, or, if you struggle with sleep, at night before bed, write a stream of consciousness. Get all of your worries, anxious thoughts and feelings down on paper. Doesn't it feel good to get it all out? Once you've done that, it's time to boost your positivity by writing a list of all the things you are thankful for. Studies show being grateful boosts feelings of wellbeing, so note down the big things (I'm grateful for my family/my home/my health) and small things (It's a sunny day/this coffee tastes great/it's nearly the weekend). Following this, set your intention for how you would like to be feeling, thinking and acting. For example, 'I am feeling safe and relaxed', 'I am feeling in control', 'I know everything will be okay'. It can be helpful to state these in the present tense, since this makes you more likely to take it on board subconsciously.

5/ ANSWER BACK

This technique is borrowed from Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Write down your worry and then give it a 'rational response'. For example, for 'That presentation went terribly, I'm a failure and everything is going wrong', you could answer back, 'The presentation did not go as well as I would have liked, however I have learned a lot for the next time and the presentation will not matter at all in a few days’ time'. You could even imagine that a best friend is answering back for you. Getting into the habit of writing down worries and answering back trains your mind to see things more rationally.

Do you have any quick anxiety-busters that work for you? Share them in the comments below.

http://www.womenshealthmag.co.uk/health/stress/1699/5-simple-ways-to-switch-off-anxiety/

WORK SMARTER NOT LONGER

Forget long hours at the office. Use these six rules to work better, get home on time – and still impress the boss

You work too hard. We suspect you knew that, but in case you didn’t, here’s some sobering statistics: work-related anxiety led to 10.4million lost working days in 2011/2012, with 20 percent of us grafting more than 45 hours a week, according Government figures. Yikes!

Yet a study at Harvard Business School found employees who left the office on time increased productivity, by working more effectively. (We bet they felt a damn sight chirpier too.) The lesson: work less, accomplish more.

Here, we reveal smart tactics to help you avoid last-minute panics, steam through your to-do list and have a life.

1/ DON’T COUNT YOUR CHICKENS

Which should come first, the chicken or the egg? When it comes to cracking the career game, they’re level pegging, says Magdalena Bak-Maier, author of Get Productive!. “Think of yourself as a chicken and the eggs as the results you get,” she says. “Trying to produce too many eggs is counter productive – your chicken will burn out. Only happy chickens produce eggs, so maintaining a healthy balance between the two is important.”

To-do lists are useful tools to stay focused on goals, but be aware that, on average, we underestimate how long a task will take by 50-70%. Bak-Maier suggests choosing one result you want to achieve each day and breaking it down into bite-sized chunks. Use a minimal computer program such as Google Docs in full-screen mode to keep you focused solely on the job in hand.

2/ ESCAPE THE NET

Surfing the web can be a huge time-waster – as you may discover to your horror if you register at Rescuetime.com. The service tracks your website usage, giving weekly graphs to show where all those lost minutes were spent. (Our bet’s on eBay.) The solution: the site blocks your access to any sites you request, for however long you need to stay distraction-free. Plus, you can set up reminders to keep projects on track. How did we do without it?

3/ CUT YOUR CUT-OFFS

Parkinson’s Law, from a wise old bird called Cyril Parkinson, states, “Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.” You can apply this adage by setting yourself shorter deadlines, which forces you to work more efficiently. Time management consultant Claire Tompkins recommends breaking projects into clear stages. Asking a colleague to proof-read your work at a specific time will ensure quality doesn’t slip either.

4/ HIRE A VIRTUAL AIDE

Outsourcing isn’t just for banks. At AskSunday.com, you can hire your own PA to 10 hours of work, such as setting up meetings or doing research for reports, for £60. “It’s easy to justify the cost,” says Dr David Spencer, senior economics lecturer at Leeds University. He argues doing such jobs yourself dilutes your earning power. Good point.

5/ GET A CUNNING PLAN

Investing two hours each week to go through your calendar and to-do list can save you up to five hours the following week, according to David Allen, author of Getting Things Done. “Do it towards the end of your work week, ideally Friday between 2pm and 4pm,” Allen says. “Look at new projects and make decisions about forthcoming issues so they don’t blow up in your face.” The easiest way to do this is to make a list of all the tasks you need to have completed by the following Friday.

Also take time to look at what’s gone wrong over the past week. Reflecting on and learning from those experiences can stop the same thing happening next time you tackle a similar job. Which means come Monday, when it’s time to clock off you’re slinging your bag over your decidedly-more-relaxed shoulder.

6/ KICK THE HANDHELD

“Don’t use your smartphone for processing email,” says Allen (sending shivers down the spines of countless addicts). A survey by software firm NeverFail found that 94% of us use our smartphone to check email after work or over the weekend. But, as Allen points out, “unless it’s from abroad, it’s highly unlikely an email will come in that you have to deal with there and then.”

In fact, checking email out of hours can be counterproductive, since if can’t deal with the issue immediately, you may well have forgotten about it by Monday morning – leaving that message to disappear down your inbox. To avoid temptation, deactivate your phone’s push email setting as you head out of the office. Then you can switch off and get more out of your free time too.

http://www.womenshealthmag.co.uk/life-skills/career/255/work-smarter-not-longer/

SCIENCE'S 5 BEST SECRETS OF SUCCESS

Get ahead with our research-backed strategies to see your career soar

1/ FIRM UP YOUR APPEAL

Women with strong handshakes were seen as more impressive than male hand-crunchers. Grip firmly making sure the web between your thumb and forefinger meets your shakee’s. Source: University of Iowa, US

2/ GO SOLO FOR IDEAS

Forget brainstorms – it’s been found you generate more and better ideas on your tod. To boost creativity, use the hand you don’t write with to make your brain work in different ways. Source: University of Amsterdam

3/ PERSUADE WITH PACE

People who spoke moderately fast, at 3.5 words per second are more persuasive than fast or slow talkers. Source: University of Michigan, US

4/ PUT PICTURES UP

Employees with control over their workspace design are more productive. Choose travel snaps – you’ll be seen as more well-rounded. Source: University of Exeter

5/ HAVE A LATTE TO NETWORK BETTER

Caffeine helps you recall words and names better, so have one half an hour before meeting new people. Source: French National Institute

http://www.womenshealthmag.co.uk/life-skills/career/380/sciences-5-best-secrets-of-success/