One Idea To Overcome Procrastination

Procrastination was of one my biggest obstacles in life which I could see was sabotaging my success.

I will try to give you the insights and experiences I went through to unlocking procrastination. It's not easy to see, it took a few years for me to figure this out.

I'll work from a mechanical point view by revealing the moving parts in the mind, that when combined, act like an engine thts stuck, full of gunk, blowing out smoke and backfiring.

Let's break it down:

Ambition - Procrastination gets worse the more ambitious you are

The obstacle - If you're procrastinating, I bet it appears big in your mind

Resources - The more money you need, the more the outlook will look bleek

Tools - If you're creative, you my feel that the software is too complicated

Volume - What you're dreaming of may seem like you need a lot of work done

Knowledge - You may be thinking you need to study more

Competition - You may feel like a small fish in a big pond

What chance do you have?

Boom!! Procrastination sets in due to doubt and uncertainty, mostly in yourself.

Doubt sabotages all ambition, doubt is like old oil in the engine block thats turned into sludge and clogging up the pistons. Often we can't see we're doubting ourselves.

Overcoming doubt is where it starts. "Lets figure out how!"

The first obstacle is to understand how the mind works. When the minds starts to piece things together, if the pieces don't fit and they seem far out, the mind will flash the red light that implies:

"How is this going to work, it just seems impossible!" "The work needs to be a professional spec" This leads to thinking, "Things may never work out"

• Turn Netflix on, nothing to watch
• Go to Facebook, nothing interesting
• Watch YouTube, nothing interesting
• Feeling yuk? "Bye bye energy!"

Sound familiar? (We're all human we all feel this way, even the best of us)

Step 1. Where it starts

We want to stand out, we want to show off, we want to succeed, we want to be the best, we want to be a winner too! But when the path looks to far to go, we're already down in the dumps.

The ancient Romans believed that success cannot be predicted which also means neither can failure be predicted, we suffer more in imagination that in reality, we hate to fail, we hate to look like a failure, we feel we may get laughed at as a failure.

"Learn to LOVE failure!" Failure is your friend!

You cannot succeed unless you fail. Failing is the same as making mistakes. Many mistakes added together become experience. Through expeirence we learn to become the master.

Therefore: Success is NOT in the future, success is today everyday! Even if you procrastinate today, every passing minute is another chance to try.

Understand the process, when something looks bleak:

1. The mind starts it's negative thinking journey.
2. Negative thinking leads to doubt
3. The feeling of doubt saps energy
4. You fall into fearful thinking mode
5. Pity sets in

Like a knot in a kites string. All you need to do is lay down the rope, sit in a quiet place, let the mind settle, turn on some soothing music and begin to unravel the knot, unravel clues to your mind.

For me what works best is the great stoic philosophers of Ancient Rome and Greece. On YouTube, look for the RedFrost Motivation Channel," BE UNSHAKEABLE - Ultimate Stoic Quotes Compilation

Sit quietly and listen to those quotes, you'll begin to see how life fits together. What starts to happen?

"New ideas!" "New ways of thinking!"

New ideas are effectively the opposite to doubt. New ideas are exciting, they give you that youthful imagination which tickles the spirit in you! They turn into the these little bubbles of butterflies in the belly!

Want proof?

Do a search on Soundcloud for a song written by "Groove Biscuit" called "Flutter". The lyrics say, "Flutter on the wings of a butterfly", actually reminds me of butterflies in the belly. Listen to it when you start to feel butterflies bubbling in the belly, the song is made to get you going with some good driving energy!

Energetic music only works when your mind starts to turn into positive thinking through fresh ideas! They create hope! They make you feel like you have a chance! Truth is everyday is another chance for you to try!

Become sensitive to your gut feel, notice the cloud lifting in the mind which sparks the gut feel, you may start to feel a sense of excitement! Butterflies start turning into energy, which then turns into more ideas, which then become exciting ideas!

This will then reveal to you:

Whats causing the procrastination, or better put, whats not causing the energy to ignite and get you going and inspire you, you need belief and to feel yourself getting up!

Learn how to unravel it yourself slowly but surely, piece by piece.

Remember, there's no rush, take your time, let it unwind itself. You'll know it's working when you start to feel inspired or when you have a feeling, a sense of weight lifting off your chest!

Now I can quote the Great former Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius, "Look within. within is the fountain of good, and it will ever bubble up, if thou wilt ever dig."

Step 2. Where it grows

If you have a dream to be successful and you somehow know deep within you that you somewhere, somehow have it in you to be great. Truth is you're right, you do have it in you!

The universe moves slowly, one galactic year takes 225 to 250 million terrestrial years. 25920 terrestrial year for the sun to rotate the zodiac. It's just entered into the age of Aquarius fpr example.

If you closed your eyes for 10 years then opened them, I'm sure you'd agree the world will have changed quite a lot.. If you looked at the earth tomorrow, will you see a difference other than the weather?

Success happens over time, there's no other way unless you win the lottery. Even then many of the lotto winners ended up spending all their money.

In order to be great at something, you need to develop a daily habit. Everyday you have to get up to try, even if it's a little. Believe that even a 5 min YouTube video on a topic you love is enough to start moving forward.

Be satisfied that progress is almost always slow, don't let it bother you that you'll have to wait. Learn to be happy with what you've got. If you didn't have them, you may find you'll miss them.

By being happy with what you have, you won't focus on what you don't have. All that you have came to you in one way or another, so too many more things will come in one way or another, there's no doubt they will come to you.

Success is a journey, a successful journey is a process of discovery! If you've read this article thus far, you're already searching, already discovering things!

Keep going, keep searching. Look for things that lift your spirit, turn OFF the news, negative information will distract you, turn off trivia and wasetful information, look for success, read quotes, watch interviews with Warren Buffett, Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos.

If you're a startup founder, watch "Start Up Grind" on YouTube. Many VCs speak there, they explain what they look for in a start up founders.

If you're an artist, writers block is a form of procrastination. Learn to love the quiet, turn off the noise, sit in nature, breathe and relax. Let the mind wonder, all you need is a few moments to capture your breath and your thoughts.

Let your mind unwind and release then give it another go everyday of your life no matter what happens!

Fall in love with the work, let the work itself make you feel good, not the reward.

https://ezinearticles.com/?One-Idea-To-Overcome-Procrastination&id=10446499

Are You Too Serious?

When I used to lead a drop-in therapy group, one night we had a very fun evening. Everyone had important triumphs to report, energy was high, we were laughing and joking. One petite woman who was there for the first time sat quietly, taking in all our humor and flip remarks.

When the circle moved around to her, she said "I don't think I belong here. I don't think I can get any work done in this kind of atmosphere. What I'm working on is too serious."

There's a happy ending. She worked that night, and decided to come back again, and began feeling better about herself, too.

Often I find people come in to counseling feeling grim and anxious. Lovers are worried about their relationships, parents about children, children about parents, everything seems bleak. Couples frequently come in terribly worried about relationships that are basically fine, with normal difficulties to work out. Last night a client called. "My partner's mad at me. He says he wants to leave. I'm scared."

After five minutes, my client realized that his partner's anger was just temporary, and while it needed to be addressed, it wasn't tragic. His partner just needed to be listened to, and not taken too grimly. Most of it was drama, to get his attention when calmness had failed. Taking it too seriously had blown it out of proportion, until it threatened to overwhelm both of them. Putting it back in perspective restored clear thinking, and the problem was easily solved. After they resolved it, they could laugh about it.

Human beings are learning devices. We are an adaptable species. Put us in a situation we don't understand, and sooner or later, we figure it out and master it. We are also a species with a sense of humor. I think the two are connected. It takes a sense of humor to be able to stumble around in an unfamiliar situation until you figure it out.

Current research has indicated that humor, specifically laughter, counteracts the devastations of stress on the body and immune system. Are you seeing a pattern here? We were given (or developed through natural selection, depending how you see it) a sense of humor, the capacity to laugh, for a purpose. It helps us adapt, learn, grow and survive.

Taking yourself and your situation too seriously deprives you of the tool of humor.

Yes, of course, it is possible to take things too lightly. We all know the frustration of having a problem that a loved one won't take seriously enough. We also know people who handle life like a joke, and never get it together. Actually, this kind of lightness masks fear that whatever one doesn't want to deal with is too heavy to handle.

What I see in my practice more often, however, is the other way around. We strive, we are earnest, we care deeply, and we want to do right. We forget about having fun, relaxing and enjoying, waiting for things to calm down, lightening up about how awful it all is.

One of my clients who works in hospice told me recently about how surprised he was at how much laughter and humor there was among the seriously ill patients there. Humor makes even illness and death more endurable, and creates warm memories.

This fall, I invite you to consider making your life as fun and easy as possible. Whatever ambition you have, take it lightly. Take Mary Poppins' advice and remember "a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down." Find as many opportunities for laughter as you can. Always read the funnies when you read the grimmer news.

Focus as much energy on what is funny or positive in your life as you do on the problems.

You may be surprised to find that you get even more work done when you take it a little less seriously, when you laugh a little more.

Studies of great human beings, who have helped improve the condition of our lives, shows most of them have fine senses of humor. Ethnic groups, such as the Jewish people, who have survived great hardships, are known for their humor.

I believe all our human capacities have meaning in our lives. The capacity to laugh may be simply to bring us closer together, to help us be social units, but I doubt it. I think its existence says something more powerful. My experience in counseling tells me laughter is one of our great healers.

Try laughing more. It's a dirty job, but someone's got to do it.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Are-You-Too-Serious?&id=10294201

Your Purpose Isn't To Meet Deadlines, It's To Find Fulfilment Through Purposeful Action (By Tony Fahkry)

An Inner Conviction To Help Others

Chances are you are reading this article on a mobile device or computer with multiple applications open?

In fact, you're probably thinking about the next thing on your to do list or contemplating a host of other things, without really being present.

We're all guilty of it. Gone are the days of being attentive to the task at hand since our minds have become saturated with stimuli. We believe if we're not attending to a million things at once, we're not productive.

And sure, we blame technology for our blind sidedness but remember, behind every technological device lies a user in control of it.

For this reason, I don't buy into the narrative that technology is to blame because we should be in control. When it becomes a weapon used against you, then it rules your life.

It's easy to be diverted from what is meaningful and be dragged into the rabbit hole of despair unable to find your way out.

You can be distracted by insignificant circumstances that vie for your attention if you don't place a high value on what is meaningful. Purposeful action arises with an intent and an inner conviction to serve others or contribute to the world.

Author Victor J Strecher states in Life on Purpose: How Living for What Matters Most Changes Everything that a strong purpose is tied to your understanding of the world: "A great purpose in life follows from values that reflect an understanding of the world."

You are guided to help the community or play a bigger role in the lives of others because your purpose aligns with your core values.

For example, if you are affected by workplace misconduct, your mission might be to raise the awareness of misbehaviour within the workplace. You are driven by personal experience to change the culture of inappropriate behaviour. Your mission is aligned with your values and intent to serve and ease the suffering of others.

Distracted From Your Purpose

I can identify with a mission that aligns with my values lost my father to an illness decades ago. I recall in the years that followed asking myself a simple question that led to where I am today: "Why do some people get sick while others are healthy?"

I have been on a journey of discovery spanning a decade, learning about why some people get sick while others thrive. I wrote a book on the subject and created a coaching program to support the book.

I learned many things along the way and helped countless individuals to heal and transform their lives, because they too were searching for answers.

"Purpose in life is concerned with what we most deeply value, and purposeful living is concerned with whether we're living for what matters most," explains Victor J. Strecher.

Fulfillment is found through purposeful action, not in meeting deadlines or having your head buried in your phone. These things distract you from your purpose and keep you entertained, neglecting what is important.

I'm yet to meet somebody other than an app developer or a person involved in the tech industry who is truly fulfilled spending hours a day on their mobile device.

I don't intend to berate technology, but highlight how much time is wasted in mindless tasks that prevent you from pursuing purposeful action. I realise many people are scared to death to pursue their purpose, let alone realise they have one.

Purpose and purposeful action can be borne out of the same intention that aligns with your core values. Stealing time on a mobile device serves no one other than the manufacturer of the device and the telephone company whose profits you bankroll.

Motivational author and speaker Brendon Burchard says in High Performance Habits: How Extraordinary People Become That Way: "Often, the journey to greatness begins the moment our preferences for comfort and certainty are overruled by a greater purpose that requires challenge and contribution."

Step out of your comfort zone and discover an intention that moves you in the smallest way. People believe purposeful action is aligned with a greater intent to change the world. It might or might not be. There is only one way to find out; take the first step.

Imagine Your Best Future Self

I was watching Ice T being interviewed on Jimmy Fallon recently and was drawn to a phrase he lives by.

He said: "Don't Guide Life, Ride Life."

Whilst it is a simple axiom, it underscores the need to flow with the currents of life. They become disillusioned when it doesn't turn out as planned and suffer as a consequence.

"Don't Guide Life, Ride Life."

To Ride Life focus on purposeful action because when you find something that rocks your boat, every minute becomes purposeful, even if you are struggling at first. For every writer and artist scrapping by, being creative far outweighs working in a job they loathe.

"Without courage, the adventure to genius and greatness can never even begin," avows author Sean Patrick in Awakening Your Inner Genius.

I've coached many CEO's and senior executives over the years who say they regret not pursuing their passions or owning their own business. Instead they are paid to pursue the company's mission instead of focussing on their own. Yet, they are tied to this way of life in order to provide for their families and live a certain lifestyle.

Let me be clear, I do not condemn corporate culture in any way. These people are brave and courageous, yet some (not all) reach a point in their lives when regret sinks in.

I oppose putting your life on hold and not taking bold risks because of limiting beliefs or societal norms. These are trappings to have you conform and limit your potential.

Brendon Burchard says: "Be more intentional about who you want to become. Have vision beyond your current circumstances. Imagine your best future self, and start acting like that person today."

My passion of writing, speaking in front of audiences and coaching amazing people arose from one question following my father's passing. That question ignited a desire that took me on a quest and later became my calling. I often tell people I could never have dreamed this life into existence.

I recall speaking to year 10 students (equivalent to Freshman - High School in the US) late last year on how to discover their passion and purpose. A student stood up and asked how he could discover what he's good at. My reply: "Fail often, learn quickly and never give up."

The message from sports psychologist Stan Beecham captures the essence of life's narrative: "Being happy is not the purpose of your life. Being fully alive and awake is the purpose of your life. That includes the pain and struggle that is a critical and necessary component to human existence."

Keep trying until you have exhausted all avenues.

I assure you, whatever inspires you has been purposefully placed as the seed of potential within you, to serve the lives of others.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Your-Purpose-Isnt-To-Meet-Deadlines,-Its-To-Find-Fulfilment-Through-Purposeful-Action&id=9881446

Why You Should Believe in the Law of Attraction

Manifestation works on the principles of the Law of Attraction (LOA), one of the most powerful, yet one of the least understood laws of nature. If you are skeptical of concepts like the law of attraction and manifestation of desires, you need to go through an experience to be cured of your skepticism. And to have an experience, you need to experiment. This means you have to make an attempt and check whether this law really works.

If you have to experience the power of the law of attraction, you have to believe in this law. A skeptic will never get success by using the LOA because the primary condition for this law to work is the existence of belief. This is why skeptics keep demanding proofs but never get them unless they are going to accept the experiences of other people.

I am a skeptic myself but I believe in the LOA. Am I contradicting myself? No. The reason I like this law is that it creates a lot of positive thinking. Whether this law works or not, people believing in this law begin to believe that good things are going to happen to them. This belief makes them expect good things and feel good about themselves.

Consider the positive energy generated by these beliefs. It has been widely accepted both by clinical and by social psychologists that positive thinking makes people more energetic and enables them to perform better. People who do things expecting a positive outcome will turn out much better performances than those who are pessimistic of the results of their efforts.

When a person believes in the efficacy of the law of attraction and does things with enthusiasm and positive expectation of his dreams manifesting into realities, he becomes an asset to the society because he will be able to contribute much better, working from a state of expectation, faith and confidence.

The flip side of believing in the manifestation miracle is the disappointment and frustration that might result from the failure to get results, But people who believe in the law of attraction generally convince themselves that failures are temporary and that their faith will eventually lead them towards success.

I am not suggesting that rational thinking is bad. Nothing can be more valuable than the ability to think rationally and clearly. But I am only pointing out that ideas like the law of attraction, the belief that one can manifest his desires etc. also have their advantages.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Why-You-Should-Believe-in-the-Law-of-Attraction&id=9908471

Using Pleasure to Create the Life You Want

Our pleasure shows us where we are in alignment. It is a natural built-in system that shows us what is right for us. However, not all experiences we might label as pleasurable are created equal.

It is helpful to learn to differentiate between types of pleasure. For example, eating a piece of chocolate cake might feel good in the moment, but that does not necessarily mean it is in alignment with you. To determine whether it is or not, you need to pay attention to the entire experience. How do you feel after you eat the chocolate cake? Does it continue to be a pleasurable experience?

It is also helpful to pay attention to the quality of the pleasure. Is it consistent throughout the layers of the experience? Using the same example of the chocolate cake, it might feel good in your mouth but not in your body. Or, maybe it negatively impacts our emotions because it's more food than we actually need and we know it, and so we feel a little uncomfortable about having eaten it.

This approach applies to all experiences in our lives: How we feel at work, how we feel in our relationships. As we pay more attention to our pleasure and learn to really listen to it, we strengthen our ability to navigate through life.

Another thing that gets in the way of using pleasure as our guide is having a negative relationship with pleasure, which can make you feel bad about something that is actually good for you. Your conditioning distorts the picture of what you are experiencing based on ideas about what you should or should not enjoy. The opposite can also be true: we can be conditioned to feel pleasure associated with things that are not good for us.

The basic experience gets distorted by misconceptions and misinterpretations of events that take what would be a simple mechanism for determining what is right for us and make it confusing. It would be wonderful if it were as easy as a pleasurable experience automatically being in alignment with your needs so you could say yes to it and welcome more of it into your life. And if it were not a pleasurable experience, then you could redirect and go in a different direction. Once we get past all of the conditioning, this is true-but that takes some time to do.

It may seem as if, given all this conditioning, it is impossible to trust how you feel about things. However, the trick is not to cast pleasure aside and start trying to figure out what is best through your mind, but instead to dive more deeply in and practice paying closer attention.

To use pleasure as a guide-and it is a very useful guide-you can start to pay attention to where you might be filtering or misinterpreting the information that's coming in about what is pleasurable and thus learn about what does or does not work for you in any given situation. As you pay attention to all aspects of your experience around an event that you consider pleasurable, your understanding of what is pleasurable will become more refined. As we become more and more refined, it becomes easier to have that simple relationship with pleasure-if it feels good, then it is good for me. Then you will be able to use pleasure to cultivate the things, the people, places, situations, and activities that you want in your life.

As you do so, you will feel so much better and better in all aspects of your life because you are creating a life that is in alignment with you. And as you cultivate this, it will actually raise your overall energy. Your energy will start operating at a higher level, which continues the refinement process of your pleasure and allows you to really hone in on what is working for you and what is best for you through what feels good. And then your pleasure will become this incredibly valuable tool for creating a life that feels really good and is in alignment with who you are.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Using-Pleasure-to-Create-the-Life-You-Want&id=9969271

Researchers Have Bad News for People Experiencing Hangovers

The age-old folk aphorism, "Beer before wine and you'll feel fine; wine before beer and you'll feel queer" was recently dispelled by a team of European researchers. The team conducted a study to examine if a particular order of drinking alcoholic beverages helped experience less severe hangover. However, for the 76 percent Americans, who experience hangovers after a drinking session, the researchers have bad news. According to their study, no matter how much an individual tries altering the order in which they drink different alcoholic beverages, they would still face a hangover, if they drink too much.

Difference in order of drinking does not affect severity of hangover

In order to figure out a way of helping people facing hangovers, the researchers, as part of this study, recruited 90 German individuals in the age group of 19 to 40 years to consume alcoholic beverages such as wine, beer, or both. After randomly dividing the participants in three groups, the researchers asked the first group to consume 16 ounces of lager beer. After this they were asked to drink four large glasses of white wine. The second group was asked to initially drink the four glasses of white wine. After that, they were asked to consume two and half pints of lager beer. The third group was made to drink either white wine or lager beer. All the three groups were medically supervised overnight.

The researchers waited till the alcohol hangover effects faded out completely and everyone recovered fully. The following week, the scientists re-gathered everyone for a second round of drinking. They made the groups drink in the exact opposite order of what was followed last time. For instance, the group that drank beer first, was made to drink wine first this time and the group that drank wine was made to drink beer first instead. The third group who drank either of the two (beer or wine) were made to drink what they did not consume last time.

The results of the study displayed no differentiation in terms of hangover intensity caused by drinking either of the alcoholic beverages - beer or wine - in any particular order. Lead author, Joran Kochling, a researcher at the Witten/Herdecke University, said that the study ruled out the old folk saying that if an individual drinks beer before drinking wine, it gives the person a less severe hangover.

Vomiting and perceived drunkenness associated with severe hangover

Even after controlling for factors such as age, gender, body weight, frequency of hangovers, and drinking habits, no substantial difference was found in the hangover scores. It was observed that women suffered a severer hangover compared to men. Blood and urine tests were also conducted to predict the intensity of hangover, but with no success.

However, there were two factors that did seem to impact the intensity of hangover symptoms the following day. These included the level of headiness people experienced at the time of drinking and if they puked. The individuals who scored higher on a scale of 1 to 10 on how drunk they felt towards the end of the drinking spree and those individuals who puked while or after drinking, rated their hangovers as severe.

Pay attention to red flags while drinking

According to Kochling, the truth is that drinking too much of any kind of alcoholic beverage is likely to result in a hangover. He said that the only way of predicting how bad the hangover is going to be, is to realize how drunk one feels and whether one feels sick. He added that every individual needs to be aware of these warning flags while drinking. If people ignore these red flags at the time of drinking, dehydration, tiredness, headaches, light sensitivity, and gut issues, in the form of a hangover, would follow the next day.

Even though the quantity of drinks that lead to a hangover varies from one individual to another, a hangover means that an individual has far exceeded the permissible limit laid down by their bodies and the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) as moderate drinking. The CDC considers one drink per day for women and two drinks a day for men as moderate drinking.

Hangovers nature's way to mold future behavior

The researchers acknowledged that this study has its own restrictions. For instance, they were unable to allocate a control group to consume a non-alcoholic beverage, as the participants were not keen on being a part of group that did not drink alcohol.

Co-author Dr. Kai Hensel, a senior clinical fellow at the University of Cambridge said that even though hangovers are unpleasant, they do have one significant benefit. They act as a shield that would probably guide people over time, to alter their future drinking behavior.

Seeking help for alcoholism

It is possible for anyone to get affected by alcohol addiction, irrespective of age, gender, or social standing. One of the stepping stones for effective recovery from alcoholism is detoxification. The process of detoxification helps the body get rid of all the toxins accumulated in the body as a result of years of alcohol abuse, manage the withdrawal symptoms, and prepare the body and the mind for alcohol addiction treatment.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Researchers-Have-Bad-News-for-People-Experiencing-Hangovers&id=10094736

Middle Class Restrictions to Freedom (By Ann Peckham)

I was the eldest daughter of a Middle Class farmer's daughter who was determined that I would have all of the opportunities that she never had.

My childhood was filled with extra classes most days of the week.

Mum was determined that I wouldn't grow up with an accent so I had elocution lessons. This meant that I was always learning poems and prose to perform on stage and as I was painfully shy these caused me terrible stomach problems.

On reflection I am eternally grateful that it has given me a beautiful speaking voice which is loved by my clients, but that took a long time to appreciate.

She also wanted me to be graceful so I started ballet lessons. Then there were piano lessons and violin lessons and recorder lessons though I wasn't allowed to have guitar lessons as that was the instrument of the devil!

This sounds like I am griping but all I am trying to show you is that my childhood was very challenging in a very middle class way. This led me to have a pretty strong rebellious streak as I developed a sense of resentment that I never had any free time. This has taken quite a long time to work through but I have got through to the other side.

The relationship with my mother was fraught with issues and arguments and I frequently felt disapproved of. There are so many examples but that is not the point of this, the purpose is to show you that I do understand.

I started my rebellion at age 15.

The two topics that could never be discussed were religion and politics as they always ended up in major arguments. It took me many years to realise that no matter what perspective I approached those from there was never going to be any common ground, so many rows later I stopped.

I married my childhood infatuation and though I loved him deeply the conditioning that haunted me from my childhood meant that the relationship was full of heated arguments.

Shortly after I had walked away from religion I ended my marriage as well. This was the start of an amazing adventure that has set me free from the straight jacket that had been my middle class upbringing. I know it could have ended up with me suffering from stress related sickness caused by the knot in my solar plexus, which would have been so until I discovered how to release it.

I now live in a way that stress is not an issue in my life, I sleep soundly and awaken with excitement for the coming day.

I am unlike the vast majority of women who live on painkillers and antidepressants as I have not taken a pharmaceutical drug for more than 12 years.

My passion is to release women from stress and reaction to enable you to feel wonderful and discover your life-purpose.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Middle-Class-Restrictions-to-Freedom&id=9713313

How You Can Break Barriers to Growth and Become Opportunity-Ready (By Dr. Bruce A. Johnson)

We are continually reminded about the "new normal" and the struggle to return business to the way it was, as if it ever can be again. The news can become discouraging while working from home, especially if it seems there is no end in sight for current the pandemic and other societal problems. Not only is the news a source of frustration, the certainty of employment has evaporated for many industries and careers. It seems as if a person who has a job has the only future available now, and to dream of anything more is to hope for too much.

Yet it is possible to think about the future, even in the seemingly worst of circumstances, whether or not you work at home, have no certainty of a job in the months to come, and you are or are not employed now. The challenge is overcoming the natural barriers your mind creates when you feel the weight of circumstances around you, from national and international crises, to your own personal and professional matters. When there are so many issues and problems vying for your attention, it weighs heavily on your mind, creating a sense of push and pull. You seem to be pushed from one headline to the next, and your attention continually pulled from one worrisome idea to another.

When you create mental barriers, it interrupts your own development and this is what prevents you from being ready for new opportunities. As an educator and career coach I have used the phrase opportunity-ready to not only refer to the future career opportunities which may come your way, but the opportunities that are available now within your existing career. For example, I am always concerned with my well-being and state of mind as an educator, knowing that I want to be opportunity-ready for my employer, ready to accept the challenges and opportunities which are a natural part of the position. You can also develop this same state of mind when you breakdown any barriers to growth that are present now.

Natural and Intentional Growth

You grow naturally without thought, at a subconscious level. This occurs through time on the job and the experience you gain, along with the skills acquired. You cannot help but grow on some level, whether or not you are aware of it. Even if you are performing the same job, day after day, and it seems as if you have grown stagnant within that position, you are still growing to some extent. Consider the knowledge you've gained, even if by trial and error, interactions with customers, problem-solving, and working on projects. You have evolved, whether or not you can see it at this time.

There is also intentional growth, or the type of growth you are aware of and intentionally pursue. It may be formal education, or the type of education obtained within a classroom environment. This type of growth may also occur by reading, attending a webinar, attempting a new project, or consciously becoming involved in any other similar endeavor. When you intend to seek out new knowledge, or acquire new skills, the purpose may be to benefit your current job or future career. The accumulation of your knowledge helps to create a competitive advantage, along with a feeling of being proactive in your career.

Discovering Your Barriers to Growth

As an educator and career coach, what I have learned through my work with students and client is the barriers to growth can be summarized into two primary categories, beliefs and acceptance. Even those who have been seemingly well-focused and able to develop goals can still become wrapped up in current events and need to work on overcoming sticking points.

Barriers Centered around Beliefs: One of the common barriers is centered on the belief that a person's life and/or career won't, can't, or will not change. This is a product of time, effort, and mental habits. If you have been trying to better your life, create new plans, initiate change, or make an attempt to find a new career path, and nothing seems to happen in the manner you would like it to, then it may become easy to develop a negative belief.

The default setting it seems is this: See, Believe, Try. It translates into: I see results of my effort, then if all goes well, I believe in myself and try again. The reverse also holds true: If I do not see the results of my effort, I will not believe in myself, and I may not try again.

Barriers Centered around Acceptance: Most individuals I work with who have this type of barrier are prone to accept reality as it is now, and they are unable to see any hope for future change. The development of reality-based barriers is even more challenging now during a pandemic when the certainty of resolution is unknown.

Anyone who struggles with fear of the future, and becomes mentally paralyzed from taking action because they see no hope, have those feelings amplified to a much greater degree now. There seems to be no escape from reminders of the bleakness the world faces either, as the worst of the crisis is ever present within news, and advertisements remind us we are isolated at home. It can be easy to eventually succumb to the feeling life will not get better.

Breaking Barriers to Growth

We often keep hitting the same wall, until we realize we have become stuck. To overcome any mental barrier, you must be willing to admit to yourself that something is not working well for you now. It is not a matter of right or wrong, ego, pride, or admission of failure. It is being able to continue to evolve, both personally and professionally. You can simply state: "Somehow I feel stuck and I want to make improvements". That's how the process of uncovering obstacles begins, as you cannot change the external or the circumstance around your life, but you can change the internal factors that are holding you back.

Self-Evaluation and Self-Discovery

To be able to uncover your barriers, you need to begin by doing what may feel the most uncomfortable, and that is to admit you need to self-examine your mindset. This will begin a process of self-evaluation, which in turn can lead you through self-discovery. The only reason obstacles exist are due to the patterns of thoughts established in the mind.

Consider this example: The mind initiates a series of steps that creates habitual thinking, which leads to chronic patterns of how you act while interacting with others in the workplace and how you perform your job. There is a logical component to these steps, as required for completing your required tasks; however, there are aspects involved that require capacity, and this is where your beliefs come in. Self-evaluation, utilizing reflection as a tool to evaluate yourself, will help to uncover those beliefs. It's not a matter of being weak when you need to determine why you are mentally stuck, it's showing yourself you want to grow.

Implement this Strategy: To help you get started, I recommend you create an event log or better stated, an event chart. The events to keep track of during each day are the tasks, requirements, duties, projects, and anything else you were consciously asked to perform in your job. This is the first column of the event chart.

The second column will be the self-reflection reactions. I recommend you record your self-reflection reactions at the end of the day, when you have time to think back on how you responded to the tasks, requirements, duties, projects, and anything noted within your event log or chart. Take time to note your initial reaction, along with the final actions you've taken.

The third and final column in your event log or chart needs to be labeled self-focus. You can complete this column at the end of the day, or perhaps you could complete this at the end of the week, after you have given yourself even more time to reflect. This column will present yourself with an opportunity to answer the following questions for each notation within the event log or chart: Was this the best response? Did this response lead to the best possible outcome? Was there a better possible response and outcome? If so, what was it?

From this event log you can then develop a plan of action. My recommendation is that you create a set of statements to acknowledge your new found wisdom. The following prompts can help you get started:

I have learned...

I now know this about myself...

I need to improve upon...

I discovered I am capable of...

I plan to choose this type of reaction in the future...

This may all seem too far-fetched for the average person to complete. Yet we live in a time when the external "noise" is so loud, which includes the technology used, we must find a way to pay attention to what is going on within our minds. This is where the pathway to success can be found, learning to evaluate ourselves from the inside out.

Becoming Opportunity-Ready

Once you've decided to take a proactive approach to evaluating your mindset, you will find yourself better positioned for future opportunities. This doesn't imply you are going to begin a job search, rather it means you are prepared to perform your best now and in doing so, you've become opportunity-ready. The success of many employers now depends upon the performance of its employees. Your willingness to perform your best not only makes you shine, you are contributing to the success and longevity of your employer, and you may also be readying yourself for future opportunities. But no matter the reason why you have broken down the barriers to your growth, it should always be done first and foremost for your own benefit and mindset well-being. To begin each day with a sense of hope and willingness to be fully engaged in whatever task comes your way, regardless of circumstances, can be one of the most rewarding feelings you will ever experience.

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How Are You Influenced and Motivated?

Negative motivators are those influences that drive us to certain and specific actions; based on a fear of some kind and maybe dislike of a certain outcome. The negative motivator may even be related an apprehension around the result; of the outcome which our inaction, or failure to undertake a specific task or fulfil an obligation; generates.

Positive motivators on the others side of the equation are those influencers which hold a desirable image, emotion or effect in our minds or habit nature.

These are interactions we know that, when completed successfully will add value to the quality of our lives, may even enhance our current situations, bring about a wonderful effect to our circumstances, or even progress us in one way or another.

These positive motivators also are borne of the understanding that when completed they will bring a better harmony, a peaceful effect to the environment, workplace or home... where we find ourselves investing in productive endeavour.

Know What Effects The Difference

The primary difference between how we perceive the difference between the two motivator categories is our freedom of choice.

Where we have negative experiences manifesting from specific actions such as, a loss, being reprimanded, receiving criticism or even a sense of discord within ourselves. We mentally and emotionally create an automatic associate between our actions and those negative connotations; and therefore, the outcome of these effects become negative motivators.

In this regard there may even be certain actions or undertakings that we really enjoyed doing; however, after repeated criticism, perhaps being mocked by the uninformed, or even receiving a reprimand, we lose our enthusiasm or joy derived and we begin to categorize these as negative.

However, with positive motivators these are thoughts, ideas, desires that let us to place ourselves above the pessimistic viewpoints of the average, beyond our current reality into a state that is future focused on the benefits and abundance attached to the enthusiastic completion of said action.

What we begin to understand is that in fact the primary difference between the two motivator categories is that it is actually our own personal approach to the specific action: our perception, our energy, our enthusiasm, our thoughts, our feelings... OUR ATTITUDE; which will decide the key differences between how the two opposite motivators influence and affect us moving forward.

A fundamental understanding that we need to resonate with, a key success minded attitude we need to adopt is: knowing that everything we do, every action we take, every thought we allow to enter our minds has the capacity to take us closer towards our desired outcomes or take us further than we had previously envisaged!

Maximizing Your Potential

'Efficient Action' and 'Acting in the Certain Way' as articulated by Wallace D Wattles in his book The Science of Getting Rich, educates us in the understanding that everything has purpose and a potential attached to it, and we need to grow out of our current situation by completing everything we do in a certain way... i.e. as a positive motivator!

This may prove to be a highly challenging prospect which leads us into conflict with our existing paradigm. Nonetheless when we begin to internalize our focus on where we are and where we are progressing to, aligned with the potential we have within us waiting to be expressed, then the influences of others or the feared outcomes do not have a bearing in our applications or responsibility.

What Choices Are Making?

So, as we continue to re-assess every action as one that will grow us, we experience an emotional and mental evolution that perpetuates like effects and like results! The ongoing perpetuation of the good allows us a resilience to reject what we do not want and a continued focus on what we do want!

So, what we close with, when we are increasing our understanding of what our specific motivators are, is that our freedom of choice will in fact decide what class any future exchanges will fall into. Our freedom of choice is a phenomenal gift that is given to us free at birth, but it is also one we give up too freely and too readily!

A simple story that illustrates this is the parable of the talents as related to us in the bible [Matthew 25:14-30].

When we assess this parable, we see that the key difference in the approaches discussed.

The fear of punishment, the fear of loss, the fear of failure and the fear of reprimand led to inaction which in turn resulted in a negative result as well as the manifestation of all the fears; for the one servant. Yet, on the opposite end of the spectrum the servants that took their responsibility seriously with a positive motivator reaped their own specific rewards.

In the case of all three... they all had the potential for the same consequences and in the instance of two of them there was a risk of greater loss therefore more severe consequences.

Let us choose to take action in an efficient and certain way so that our gifts increase through action taken with positive motivation!

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All Misfortune Is A Stepping Stone To Fortune

No matter how many setbacks you encounter in life, just consider them as part of your stepping stone to your fortune. You will realize how fulfilling it can be when you focus your mindset on the positive things that life brings instead of the problems.

People who were able to make a difference in the lives of others have legacies that last for a lifetime. They won't become what and who they were if not because of the hardships and struggles that they encountered in life. They rose from failure to failure before they succeed.

Failure can in fact be an impetus to success if we use it to our advantage. When we welcome trials as something to be learned from, we become our best version. Though it is not easy and it really stings but if we look at it in a different light, we are not wasting our valuable time because overcoming one misfortune to another will make us stronger and more determined.

Sometimes, we feel impatient for the wasted time we spent on something but oftentimes there is always better out there waiting to be discovered and explored. We can't change what happened in our lives but definitely the way we react to those circumstances impact on what will happen next in our lives.

We cannot decide the time and place of our misfortunes. These happen when we least expect them like an unexpected guest who comes to our home surprisingly. We can do nothing about it but accept and embrace it as part of life. Who knows, it might offer us a good fortune.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. Instead of whining, we better move forward and do something to turn it into a good fortune. Misfortunes can only become stepping-stones to success when we welcome them with enthusiasm and hope in our heart. When we don't complain, there is a chance for us to understand why something needs to happen. By doing so, we are able to handle our misfortune better than we expected.

When are able to grasp the lessons that misfortunes offer, it can help us become more conscious of our life. Living with awareness is a vital step to seeing misfortunes differently. When we don't blame others for our bad luck or fate; we realized that the rest will follow. Blaming others for our circumstance won't help us grow; the very reason why misfortune keeps on repeating one after another.

The disappointments that we overcome prepare us to adjust to whatever misfortune we will encounter in the future.

https://ezinearticles.com/?All-Misfortune-Is-A-Stepping-Stone-To-Fortune&id=9821055

Why The Obstacle Before You Is Never Bigger Than Your Power To Overcome It

Lean In To Your Difficulties

The reason you fear obstacles is that you doubt your ability to overcome them. Obstacles are seldom the problem, it is our lack of power to conquer them that gets in the way. For example, have you faced a difficult situation in the past and worried you would not make it through? Recall the circumstances and how you felt as best you can. Now fast forward months from when it occurred and call to mind the same situation from a renewed perspective. Can you see how insignificant it seems from your current outlook? That is, we feel incapable of overcoming challenges instead of believing we will be OK. Perhaps it's the element of surprise or the fear we are powerless to face the problem that scares us most.

It is what author and psychotherapist David Richo refers to in The Five Things We Cannot Change: And the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them when he says: "We worry because we do not trust ourselves to handle what happens to us. We worry because we do not trust that the way the chips fall will work out for the best. We worry because we have not yet said yes." Therein lies the issue: acknowledging the obstacle instead of wanting it to disappear. I'm not talking about unexpected events such as a speeding ticket or your romantic interest not returning a text message. Whilst I acknowledge this may cause distress for some people, I'm talking about larger issues that call on our deepest inner strength. Saying yes to what transpires means leaning in to your difficulties even though it may look untenable on the face of it. However, if approached with an open mind, we will overcome it and gain valuable insights.

No Other Choice Than To Be Courageous

Your inherent power is one of resiliency, determination and courage. Do you believe this power is available to you? Sometimes, we won't know the depths of our power until we are tested. I have faced many challenges throughout my life including the death of a parent and coming to terms with a life-threatening illness. I didn't realise I had the power to overcome those experiences until I had to. In the years that followed, I not only developed a greater strength of will, but the experiences softened me and I developed a humility towards life. I came to appreciate this entity called life is much greater than me. I came to look upon it with reverence and acknowledge that whilst I'm a small cog in the process called life, it functions perfectly irrespective of my thoughts.

Not everyone shares my outlook and that's fine. I wouldn't want to impress my views upon others because they are uniquely mine. I've met many people over the years who endured similar experiences and each person formed their own meaning of the events. Can you reflect on events in your own life that changed your outlook? Was the change for the better or were you angry with others, perhaps with life? It's hard to know how we will react in difficult moments. Sometimes there's no other choice than to face our hardships and step into battle with fierce determination and courage. For instance, if your loved one wants a divorce, you can wallow in self-pity and claim not to have seen the writing on the wall. You might experience sadness for months or brave through it as this is happening to you and see where it leads, not because you want to but because there is no other choice; sometimes there is no other choice than to be courageous.

Therein lies the key message of this article: when there's no other choice than to be strong, life calls us to exert our greatest strength because what we're experiencing may be bigger than we realise. When we don't have a choice other than to step into the fire, what awaits us on the other side is a journey of self-discovery, knowing we are more resilient and courageous than we imagined. It is what author Alex Pattakos refers to in Prisoners of Our Thoughts: Viktor Frankl's Principles for Discovering Meaning in Life and Work where he writes: "Courage is not the absence of fear but the awareness there is something more important." I'm reminded of those who lose their homes in a fire or their life savings to scrupulous insurance companies who undermine their trust or those whose family members betray them. These things happen to good people everyday and many of them have no other choice than to face their challenges. By leaning in to them, we develop the capacity to yield to the forces that oppose us. We learn the obstacle is never bigger than our power to overcome it. It is our willingness to move towards it with faith and determination, trusting the experience itself, which will activate our inherent power.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Why-The-Obstacle-Before-You-Is-Never-Bigger-Than-Your-Power-To-Overcome-It&id=10003049

How Your Inner Being Tells You The Good Things | Abraham Hicks [GREAT]

Seeing Signs of Love (By Kathy Wilson)

Most often when you become aware of the emotion of love, you're feeling it with your physical body. However you can also see love.

Although we humans define love as an emotion, the true nature of love is that it's simply an extremely high frequency of energy. The human body senses this energy in many ways - seeing, hearing, physical sensations, and more. The information of the energy as it's sensed by the body is sent along nerve pathways in the body to the brain, where that organ interprets it. If the information is interpreted as being of extremely high benefit to the body, the brain deems it to be what we humans call love.

For example, the light that is hitting the retina of your eyes is actually encoded data for your brain. The information is sent to the brain for deciphering via the optical nerve. If the interpretation is of a pleasing nature, according to the information stored in your brain, then you might respond by saying that you love what you're seeing.

The importance of this process is that however your brain interprets what you're seeing, it can change how you feel. So just the simple act of looking at something affects the state of your emotions and your physical well-being. Remember that stress, anger, tension, and other forms of the low frequential energy of fear have been found to actually cause illness and disease.

One very powerful and yet quick and easy way to change your emotional state from a lower, fear-related frequency to a higher, love-based one is to look for signs of love. Here are some examples:

1. As you go for your daily walk (you are getting outdoors and exercising aren't you?) notice the beautiful yards you pass by. Someone loved planting those flowers, that tree, those shrubs. And they love them enough to care for them, or at least to make sure they are cared for by others.

2. Notice how carefully people pick out their produce at the grocery stores. They're showing love for themselves and for their families by selecting the healthiest foods to eat.

3. Catch people smiling at one another. If they look your way, give them one of your smiles and watch their face light up.

4. Know that the majority of people you see working at jobs are doing so to provide a home, food, clothing, and more for their family.

5. Watch young dads playing with their small children, taking them along as they do chores such as grocery shopping, and having big, adult-type conversations with them.

Noticing signs of love is an extremely powerful and fast-acting antidote to fear.

Here's five of my most recent signs of love:

1. My neighbor decided we need something smile about, so in the middle of summer he set up his favorite Christmas decoration - a giant inflatable polar bear with a huge smile - in his front yard for all who pass by his home to enjoy. It works! I smile every time I see it.

2. A heart on an Alder tree trunk down the street where I walk or drive by almost daily. Someone must have painted the heart on the tree and beautiful moss grows around it, forming a lush green frame.

3. My two cats who are always together, whether they're sleeping or eating. They continually amaze me with their love for each other.

4. A neighbor whose dear pet dog is elderly and can't walk very well any more, so she bought a stroller for her dog. Now she and her beloved dog can still have their daily outing together.

5. A friend who let his granddaughter paint his toenails purple. That's a lotta love there!

What's on your list? What signs of love have you seen recently? Start your own list of signs of love. Keep it handy for those days when you need an emotional pick-me-up. And add to it frequently.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Seeing-Signs-of-Love&id=10313338

The Winning Thought!

Being self-actualized is more powerful than being enlightened. When you have reached the end, it does not end. So, you must get a new goal always, and you must continually take action achieving each new goal with a living psyche (life filled spirit) that does not take anything for granted forever. With that said, I begin this article. "The end" is really "The beginning" always when really thought about, because when you retire, you either get another goal or you die. When you reach the end, you stop forever and die or do more that is something different, it never ends. Indeed, the winning thought is not to retire or get enlightened and reach "the end", everything is really an open-ended process of eternity and infinity existence when really thought about.

You see, so many people act like life is an end to be reached then they retire after doing so much service and achieving a "big goal". Happiness and fulfillment does not work that way, and that is how real losers think in reality because of the realistic "what next" factor life automatically has because of its genuine nature.

Winning is a consistent forever process, and I mean real winning that happens all the time. I do not mean reaching a temporary goal or objective, I mean going with existence forever where it may genuinely lead. Consciousness does not die, and nor does spiritual energy, it just changes or the caterpillars forever turn into butterflies in nature and reality everywhere.

With all that getting, get reality! There is not any real retirement or end to be reached, it is a consistent process. Winners realize this, losers think: "Damn, I won the pot, that is it!" or "I lost and I genuinely quit!"

What do you think enlightenment is? It is a concept of the end without considering what happens after it. Enlightenment is an unrealistic concept as most people think it is. Realistic enlightening is consistent working on yourself without end or breaking the link in your mind, body and spirit. Indeed, I did not say "perfection", that is an unrealistic concept and perception to. I am basing this on what actually exists, eternal work and process at it. Eternal momentum and results that work genuinely always. Not perfectly, but always working in the right ways that are genuine and needed. That is the process in reality, quite simply, take or leave the gift here.

https://ezinearticles.com/?The-Winning-Thought!&id=10314700

To Some, Half a Story Is Better Than the Whole Truth

If you are to realize true happiness, you must be wiling to accept the world in which you live and your role in the happenings of your life. Interestingly, people have an uncanny ability to rewrite history so it better fits their own personal reference frame. Some have the ability to rationalize the events in a particular event's sequence and reconstitute these happenings to the outcome that best fits their personal reference of what was perceived to happen or what (innately,) the individual wanted to happen.

This approach is in diametric opposition of Article I of the Constitution of Intention. The liar will often promote a false story of historical proportions in order to protect the idea, belief, or reputation that this individual has worked to manufacture for him or herself. In further violation of the article, to share only half of a story's facts fails to fulfill the personal aim of honorable existence and promotes a false assumption of character and conduct. To violate Article I is a direct violation of fostering public and personal trust. The liar goes around this article by simply leaving out portions of the narrative or history in order to shore up the lie. As a direct result of the liar's omission, the story now appears to have purpose and merit. Simple. Easy. Expertly crafted. Now, the story is no longer a lie; that is, in the point of the view of the liar.

Regardless of the omission of the facts, it is still a lie. A half story does not promote validity. It only works to shore up a lie by burying the true happenings of other details under a mountain of handpicked reasonable and believable facts. Never discount that the remaining facts may also be imperceptions of reality and therefore, deepens the severity of lie by warping facts that surround an event and repacking those "facts" as lie. Never underestimate the aims of a liar. Consider this perspective as an additional mind-scrambler: what if (subconsciously) the liar was working to promote or towards a self-defeating outcome? What if this person not only omitted the facts that support the counter arguments, but also reinvented the history of the remaining facts to undermine and destroy the intended outcome in is entirety? It sounds unbelievable, I know. Unfortunately, you will find that some individuals just like to, "watch the world burn." Deep within the sick psyche' of someone who wants to be at the epicenter of attention, the liar works to dismantle the world around him or her. This person's subconscious is deviant, working to disrupt or destroy good things so that others may not experience happiness; misery often enjoys company.

The liar never owns his or her own bad behaviors nor assumes personal responsibility. Therefore, it is in this character flaw that he or she must leave out certain parts of a story and backwardly re-engineer the circumstances in order to blame and /or place greater fault on another party or parties, thereby reconciling the liar's bad behavior or misconduct and giving that misconduct meaning, purpose and validity. Again, this is a direct violation of honorable conduct amongst people.

In these cases, he or she who is unwilling or incapable of accepting his or her own personal faults or role in an action, or would rather believe his or her own half of the story in order to reconcile this Cognitive Dissonance, is surely living in a false and conceived reality of imagination. This conduct also earns a charge for violating Article VIII - Humility rooted Existence. It is always honorable to own one's behaviors and stand to be corrected.

In order to greater understand the liar's lack of citing all sides of an argument, we must define and discuss dissonance for just a moment.

Cognitive Dissonance is the feeling of uncomfortable tension that comes from holding two conflicting thoughts in the mind at the same time. These uncomfortable feelings come from having to deal with the happenings of reality and how it conflicts with our own personal perception of the events when such events contradict our beliefs, values, ethics, or own ability to recognize our own personal inequities.

Dissonance increases with:

• The importance of the subject to us

• How strongly the dissonant thoughts conflict with each other

• Our inability to rationalize and explain away the conflict

Dissonance is often strong when we believe something about ourselves and then do something against that belief. The discomfort often feels like a tension between the two opposing thoughts. To release the tension we can take one of three actions:

• Change our behavior

• Justify our behavior by changing the conflicting cognition

• Justify our behavior by adding new cognitions

Dissonance is most powerful when it is about our personal self-image, how we see ourselves in the world, and how others see us. Having worked in the fitness industry for over 20 years, I can palpate feelings of insecurity and poor self-perception in the statements, suggestive actions, and conduct of people. Often, I can identify these feelings in people through casual conversation. Such discussions outline changing habits and behaviors that promote feelings of good health and wellbeing. Simply negating one's belief systems regarding fitness, exercise and eating can be construed as a personal attack. In most cases of people with whom I meet and just below the surface in places that the person fears to go, one can identify those who are victims of their own dissonance. Typically, people who are easily shaken and are personally uncomfortable regarding their feelings and moral compass in decision-making often identify with this dissonance but do not discuss it or such conflict resolutions easily.

Dissonance increases with the importance and impact of the decision, along with the difficulty of reversing it. Discomfort about making the wrong choice of taking one's side in an argument is clearly bigger than choosing a pair of pants that day. Thus, when a decision gives way to a myriad of internalized personal conflicts, the likelihood of one's dissonance increases exponentially and directly disproportional to the person's rational mindedness, emotional stability, and ability to reason reality versus fantasy.

Some people see events NOT as they occurred but more as they believe they occurred. This belief is so tightly bound in the person's own personal perception and reinforced through one's own dissonance, that any fact or point of view that conflicts with this perspective is simply vanquished as mistruth, lies, exaggerations, or a manipulation of a circumstance's happenings. The person would rather believe his or her own story versus allowing another story to overwrite the former.

Therefore, to some, half of the story is better than the whole truth:

• A liar's inability to recognize his or her own personal faults makes this person feel better about his or her waged transgressions against others.

• The simple-minded accept a liar and the reputation the liar has worked to engineer. Believing stories that invalidate a liar's arguments exposes personal weaknesses in the follower and may give rise to a contentious challenge with the liar. Therefore, a follower who does not aim to argue for or support the truth must also live with his or her own character flaws for accepting disgraceful conduct.

• The listener / follower of the liar falsely believes that he or she is absolved of the sin for supporting the half-truths of a liar in the name of "loyalty."

If you want to be truly happy:

• You must be willing to listen to all of the facts that surround a series of events. You will need to find the strength within yourself to listen to those things that you would rather not hear or prefer not to believe about this person that you may call, "a friend," and accept the entire library of facts that surround an event or circumstance. The truth is liberating.

• Emotional feelings cloud our judgment and prevent us from allowing all details to be evaluated and weighed equally. Leave your emotions at the door so you can better evaluate every fact and conclude what is the case, not that which you would like it to be.

• If you seek to live in a world of that is truly untethered from the invalid, you must eradicate the negative, undermining people from your life who wield illogical, immoral, unethical or selfish tendencies. To be truly happy, you must allow the whole story to be told and not judge any of the accused until you have collected the entire library of facts.

• Accept all of the positives and all of the negatives of a story to be told. Your mind knows the difference even if you do not wish to accept it.

• Accept what is true and do not parse ideas within a story that will help you to sleep better at night. What is... is. The sooner you accept what is true, the sooner your brain will resign itself to dealing with accepting what sometimes cannot be believed.

People wield an uncanny ability to decide what they BELIEVE is true. All of the rest of the story has no meaning.

https://ezinearticles.com/?To-Some,-Half-a-Story-Is-Better-Than-the-Whole-Truth&id=9973168

Stop Sapping Your Energy With Self-Criticism

Self-criticism is one of the biggest time-wasters going. Why do I say that?

Well, when you're sapping your energy with self-criticism you're working from a scarcity mentality. It's like you're trying to complete a manual task with one hand tied behind your back.

Actually, it's even worse than that, because you are probably simultaneously berating yourself for not working faster and more accurately.

Indeed, self-criticism is one of the biggest time and energy wasters there is.

Self-Criticism Narrows Your World

Time is neutral - it just is. There is no value or value judgment inherent in time. Values and value judgments surface around the choices you make about your time, but they have nothing to do with time itself.

And the choices you make about your time are very important. But approaching those choices with critical energy doesn't help you make better choices. In fact, all that energy does is constrict your field of vision and narrow your range of choices.

Can you see how unhelpful that is?

Values-Driven Time Management vs. critical energy...

When it comes to making time-choices, critical energy is as debilitating as fear of scarcity. You eliminate possibilities with harsh judgments rather than with facts based on observation.

So, what would it feel like to start looking at your time choices with curiosity and excitement rather than with fear, self-criticism, and judgment?

Here's something to try... Briefly document the choices that you make each day as you manage your time. Don't judge, just document.

What factors do you weigh as you make your time choices? What actual facts emerge about your choices? How do you feel about what you observe?

Remember, don't judge or criticize, just look and see. Removing self-criticism from the equation opens up so many possibilities.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Stop-Sapping-Your-Energy-With-Self-Criticism&id=10130634