There Are Three Types Of People

Yes, there are millions of types of people but, they all fall into one of three categories (for the sake of this article) - yes people, no people and maybe people. Let me explain.

But before I do, let me be clear - your response to the following will tend to be an automatic quick reaction to what you read. In other words, you will be an example of what the point of the article actually is - you will have a yes, a no or a maybe response to the content of this article and what and how I share it. OK, now that that's out of the way, on to the substance.

Yes, people are not pie in the sky optimists but tend to see the world as half full vs. half empty. They tend to have open minds even about things they are uncomfortable with or know little about. Their first reaction to meeting new people, new ideas, not opportunities and yes even new problems and challenges are - a yes - I can do it, I can figure it out, I will make it work, I won't let it derail me, I won't let it ruin me, I won't give it control over me etc. They are not always easy to persuade or influence just because they are yes people, but they are more open and receptive to new and different stuff, ideas, people, and circumstances.

No people, on the other hand, are just the opposite of yes people. Their first responses to most stuff is a quick - no - I can't, it won't work, it's too expensive, too cheap, too old, too new, he's too arrogant, she's too short etc. get it - these folks are closed off from almost anything and everything that represents new, change, better, different etc.

And then there are maybe people. These folks can go either way - yes or no, but their reaction and responses will generally be governed by a number of factors. Their need for approval, their need to avoid rejection, their self-esteem, their desire to avoid conflict, their desire to contribute to positive outcomes regardless of whether they are based on or grounded in truth, reality or evidence. They have decision phobia when any of the above situations are in play. Yes, they can be yes people, but when it suits the circumstances, environment or outcomes and yes, they can be no people depending on the same issues. A few things to consider and I'll keep them short.

What are the major contributors to which group a person is in?

Your upbringing and early conditioning by parents, caregivers, churches, schools and teachers, relatives, friends and anyone who had temporary or permanent influence over what you learned, what and who you were exposed to and everything you were taught. Most psychologists agree that a person's self-esteem is established at the latest by age 10. So, before you hit your teens you tended to be a yes, no or a maybe person.

Can someone successfully switch groups permanently?

Yes, but it's not easy and takes time, a lot of effort, great patience, focus, new learning, a lot of will and a great deal of desire to change. It's harder for no people to change and it takes more time for a maybe person to change.

Which group tends to be happier and more content?

What do you think? And why - if you were right - It's yes people. Can no or maybe people be happy and content? Of course, but it's not an easy journey for them.

Which group tends to be more successful?

What do you think? And why - if you were right - It's yes people. Can no or maybe people be successful? Of course, but it's not an easy journey for them.

Which group tends to be healthier?

What do you think? And why - if you were right - It's yes people. Can no or maybe people be healthy? Of course, but it's not an easy journey for them. Sensing a pattern here?

Which group tends to live longer?

What do you think? And why - if you were right - It's yes people. Can no or maybe people live long lives? Of course, but it's not an easy journey for them.

There are a lot of other areas we could discuss that specifically address each group and its issues, circumstances, tendencies, behaviors, attitudes etc. but if you are a no person I have lost you by now. If you are a maybe person you are conflicted because of certain things I have said and if you are a yes person you have other things to do and I'm not telling you anything you don't know or have felt or believed in the past and I have just put words to the subject and it's time for you to move on to something else.

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Do You Need An Encourager In Your Life Now?

Do you need an encourager in your life now? Ever needed one in the past? Are you an encourager? Just so we are on the same page if you decide to read this article - an encourager is someone who - guess what - yes, encourages others. But, is there more to the idea of being an encourager? Yes, and I know firsthand what role an encourager can have in our life when we are heading in the wrong direction, hitting bottom or just feel like no one cares.

During my years I have had many occasions when I was in desperate need of encouragement rather than invalidation. And, on some occasions, these people showed up and, on many occasions, I was left alone to navigate life's challenges, trials, adversity and failures alone. I have learned both the hard way and the easy way the importance of having encouragers in our lives when we need them.

How about you - ever had to deal with a life issue alone and no one was in your corner or maybe even no one who cared? I can tell you if you have never been there that these times can be very trying life circumstances that can stretch us to our limits of faith, patience, hope, and belief forcing us to reach deep and find something we didn't even know we had.

What is the role of an encourager?

Encouragers are not in our lives to pave the way forward so that we can aimlessly wander through life's circumstances, lessons and challenges without effort, learning, fear or even guaranteed success. Encouragers are teachers. They are caring and compassionate souls who want to help us learn life's lessons with as little pain and trauma as possible but they are not in our lives to help us avoid what life wants and needs us to learn so we can be productive humans regardless of our roles, responsibilities or opportunities. Encourages can cheer us on, root for us and listen to our concerns and needs but their role is not to remove the learning from our lives that are necessary to master so we can grow and become productive in whatever fashion we have chosen.

Encouragers don't remove the pain or drama from our life, but they help us to find the inner courage, belief, and resilience to handle it, manage it, overcome it and yes learn from it.

Who can be an encourager?

Encouragers can be family, friends, co-workers, customers and even total strangers. I can recall years ago sitting in an airport waiting to board a flight when I was having a conversation with a total stranger. FYI - ever had one of those - where you shared intimate inner fears, dreams, plans, hopes or frustrations with a total stranger who you knew you would never see again? Happens all the time and why? We all need times to share, express and cathart and if we don't have people in our routine lives who can fill this role, we will reach out to anyone and everyone from time to time.

Back to my example - I shared with them the frustration of dealing with a challenging client that I had been working with for years. They listened respectfully as I went on for what seemed forever, and they finally asked a simple question. "Why are you tolerating this behavior and not just cutting the cord and moving on?" This is not what I thought I wanted to hear or felt I needed to hear but it was what they chose to share, and you know what - in reality, it was exactly what I needed to hear.

I could have shared this with a spouse at the time or a few good friends and peers but was unable to admit the frustration to them so I just kept it bottled up inside me to the detriment of other relationships and activities in my life that kept deteriorating due to my lack of ability or willingness to address the issue. Finally, with the help of a total stranger, I was able to move one.

Ever been there? How about family, friends and even neighbors who from time to time are needed to help us weather life's storms?

How can we handle stuff when we don't have an encouraged in our life?

Trials, tribulations, adversity, disappointment, failure, etc. are all a normal part of living. To deny them is to be naive and immature. So, what are we to do when they strike with or without warning? There are dozens of ways to manage life's negative circumstances and while some are more efficient than others many can be a waste of time, energy and even resources.

Enter the encourager, someone who can help you, support you, believe in you, teach you, encourage you and care. No one likes going through adversity alone especially when we are unable to see clearly the resources, solutions or answers that are obvious and right in front of us.

No one wants to feel abandoned or without someone who cares when life's negatives show up on our doorstep. We all need emotional support from time to time regardless of our age, gender, financial status or education.

Without encouragers in our lives during challenging times we will tend to overreact, fall into depression, feel hopeless, make dumb decisions or just isolate ourselves from the world.

Encouragers are an important part of our lives and believe me having gone through many negative life experiences alone I treasure a few of the encouragers I have had during my life. "Thant you - each and every one of you."

What does it take to be an encourager for others?

I'll keep this final question short and to the point. To be an encourager you need some or many of the following traits, characteristics, attitudes, beliefs, values, etc.

-You care about the influence you have on others.

-You believe in the value of the human spirit in others.

-You do not have a selfish bone in your body.

-You always put others ahead of yourself.

- You have a giving spirit.

- You want to leave a legacy of service.

- You have the ability, to be honest even when the message might be perceived as negative.

- You have a healthy self-esteem.

- You don't need the approval of others to feel personal value.

- You are a listener.

- You do not have personal agendas whole encouraging others.

Yes, there are many others, but these are a few of the basics

Got any of these traits? Need them from someone else?

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How To Be A Creator Of Circumstances

How to be a creator of circumstances rather than letting things just happen to you, is an idea that enters your mind when you realize that your thoughts somehow shape the reality you experience. Of course, opinions and beliefs influence the world around you, but how they affect you is your choice.

But if the answer is so simple, why isn't everyone doing it? Why aren't most people successful or happy? What is the difference between a creator and a creature of circumstances?

Circumstances are often attributed to things beyond our control. It is a word we often use to prove, describe or explain the situation we are in at present or in the past. But when you think in this way, you then are a creature of what is happening around you. Situations control you when it should be the other way around.

When you want to become successful or get something, you have to believe in your abilities. But you also need to realize that you control your thoughts. Thus you can shape your circumstances. It is the only way I know how to build a life, where you do what you want to do. And it takes knowledge, obligations, awareness, belief, risk, intuition and hard but smart work.

"Successful people are one hundred percent convinced that they are the masters of their own destiny. They are not creatures of circumstances, they create circumstances, and if the circumstances around them suck, they change them." - Jordan Belfort, the Wolf of Wall Street.

Creature of Circumstances

Just look at the present circumstances in your life, which are in control and which are you directing? When you search deep enough, you may find that while many are a result of the habits and choices you made over the years. Others are the consequence of other people's beliefs, preferences, and decisions.

So, how they affect, touch and impact you are your decision. Let's say that you had a bad experience with a cat when you were younger. And so, it creates a fear which makes you decide never to touch or get close to cats again. Believe me when I tell you that any animal sense the fear you have of them, and it reinforces it by their reaction when they are close to you.

As a result, you avoid cats and refuse to get near them. In this way, it also makes your social life tricky as you have a hard time visiting friends who have cats. You may even avoid certain places or cross the street as soon as you see one. In this instance, you became a creature of circumstances because your lousy experience made you a slave to a habit which has created different situations for you.

Two Types of People - Creator and Creature

Therefore, in this world, there are only two kinds of persons:

1. People who are a creator of circumstances and turn everything they want into reality.
2. The rest who are creatures of circumstances which is no other than 95% of the population and gets little to nothing.

Do you really want to be known as the person, who settles, goes through life barely making it, being satisfied with what you get and accepting what happens? Or do you want to be great and successful, and have a legacy and a reputation as someone who is a warrior in life?

Well, personally, I am a person who wants to make an impact and is a creator of his own world. So, you have to be an architect that creates his own life and designs it, despite all obstacles. You should strive to be a creator of circumstances instead of a creature of it. I know, I know- easier said than done. But do you have a better choice in mind?

How to Be a Creator of Circumstances

In the past, I was at times a creature to some of the circumstances life offered me. And I know you have to or still do. It is no fun at all as one grows resentful. But in the times where I won, I realize I created and controlled all of my circumstances. So how can you go from a creature to a creator?

First of all, if you change your thoughts, you will begin to alter your circumstances. Most people react to conditions or situations thinking that they have no control over them. It is true to some degree! There are various things that you cannot control. Stuff like who your relatives are or specific physical features you have.

But rather than letting the circumstances mold you, you have to be the one who changes the conditions of life that surround you. You can think, analyze and figure out whether you want to accept the situation or replace it. So, you are the creator of your circumstances, even if you do like it or don't.

Habits and Circumstances

In fact, most of your circumstances are a result your choices and decisions in life. If you take the time to search the source or cause of the reason you are in your situation, you might find out that you chose or decided what brought you there. But again, you must realize that unconscious habits have a significant role to play in the circumstances you create for yourself.

Therefore, these habits reinforce and support your beliefs, views, and principles. And it becomes even harder to change. Deep-rooted habits and circumstances are somehow intertwined. So you have to work on your inner self to change your outer world. You have to replace some habits with better ones.

However, too many people accept the status quo and refuse to go against the flow, out of fear. Everyone wants change, but not many want to change. When you look at the world around you, you can see what I am talking about here. To be a creator of circumstances, you have to go against the flow.

Creators Change the World

What happens when people who have enough do something about it? They change the world. I never settled very often in my life, and when I did, I rebelled against it after a while. Life is not about giving in but about fighting back.

On the other hand, so many people use circumstances to justify or excuse why they are the way they are. It is much easier to blame someone or something for the bad that happens or for the failures than to look within.

So, start to be honest with yourself. Ask yourself what the worst thing that could happen, if you become the creator of your circumstances, is. Focus on the best-case scenario instead of looking at the worst one. Great things happen to those who believe and take action.

Most of the time, the probability of success is on your side. Visualize what you want. Take action every day. Build momentum. The choice is yours but remember; it is better to be a creator of circumstances than to be a creature of situations which dictate your life.

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Does My Mentality Limit My Success

As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he - Proverbs 23:7

Some have said success is a mental thing. To the extent that it is virtually impossible to be a real success with a failure mentality that is true. But just how important is mentality to success? Can you really "Think and Grow Rich" like Napoleon Hill wrote in his world-famous book?

It is impossible to separate what we are in our core from what we believe about ourselves. We may say things that are different than what we believe but we cannot think things that are different than our beliefs. If you believe you can, you can; if you believe you can't, you can't. What you believe you will achieve in this lifetime.

Anytime a person sets out on a journey to become successful in any endeavor the first thing they must accept is the dream they have about being a success. They think they can do something; they imagine themselves doing it and soon their actions reflect what they have been thinking all along. Actions follow thought and when it comes to becoming a success actions follow intentional thought.

Success starts with a dream. We see in our minds eye an event or circumstance that involves what we are hoping for. I remember as a young man wanting to own a home. Didn't think it was possible. Then the building we were living in went up for sale and I was going to have to move soon. That prompted me to stop and consider what purchasing a home would entail. When I looked at the programs available for first time homebuyers, the cash involved (which I could have to close the deal) and the process it would take. I went over the idea with my wife and she jumped on board.

The process of (1) never thought about it (2) now I am thinking about it (3) how do I make this dream a reality is the thought process people who are now successful had to go through. Every great project begins with a dream. If you can see it, you can have it. But when it's out of mind it will remain out of sight. The goal of becoming successful is to utilize the concepts of visualization, repetition and faith in your ability to accomplish anything you set your mind to do.

It's not the man with skills or intellect or experience that ultimately wins; it's the man who thinks he can, regardless of the obstacles and difficulties he must endure to get there.

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It's A Mind Thing (By Jana Hicks)

Having a healed soul begins with having a healed mind. The soul house your mind, will, and emotions. I am in the life long process of healing my soul. When I got saved/born again my awareness of the damage and trauma in my soul became heightened as my relationship with God and His word continued to grow in my life. My thinking was so messed up. I cried out to God to help me because I didn't know how I was going to make it pass all of the trauma in my soul. With each experience and with each loss of family members back to back parts of me became deeply wounded by the losses. Three of the losses was my 3 siblings. After my youngest brother passed I didn't know how I was going to come out of all the trauma.

As I prayed about it God started showing me through different ministers that it is my thinking and changing the negative thoughts rooted deeply in my neural pathways with the word of God. Even though I know the word it was going to take a deeper work to heal my mind. Thoughts are everywhere and if you do not cast them down you will keep fighting them to a place where it can wear you out.

As 2 Corinthians 10:5 (The Voice) tell us what to do with a negative mindsets:

We are demolishing arguments and ideas, every high-and-mighty philosophy that pits itself against the knowledge of the one true God. We are taking prisoners of every thought, every emotion, and subduing them into obedience to the Anointed One.

I learned through a well-known minister Dr. Juanita Bynum how to change my brain. Even my Pastor A.R. Bernard taught on it. God was speaking loud to me! As I began to apply what I was learning the darkness in my soul was giving way to the light of the word of God. This is a lifetime process and you will have moments when it feels as you took steps backwards but don't give up on the process of taking control of how you think. Here are a few steps to follow I have learned and will work as long as you stay consistent in applying them:

1. You have 10 seconds before a negative thought becomes yours. Replace that thought with positive new information/thought - the word of God.

2. It takes 12 pieces of positive information to remove one negative thought

3. Negative thoughts are going to come make sure you don't let them make a nest in your head.

4. Screen your thoughts and think about what your thinking.

5. Don't just let your mind wander all over the place

6. Meditate on the word of God to help push out the negative.

Romans 12:2 (New International Version) States:

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will.

You are the sum total of your thoughts this motto rings so true "A Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Waste" so don't waste it.

Quote: Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will - Zig Ziglar

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So You Want to Feel Happy?

Many people see being happy as their main aim in life. Ask them what they truly want and they'll probably reply, 'to feel happy'. However, I see happiness as a by-product in life, generated by activities and experiences, like a walk in nature, sitting people-watching in the mall, enjoying someone's company, having a particularly satisfying or successful day. Few of us set off in the morning with happiness as our main aim for the day.

When you want to feel happy it starts by appreciating the small things in life. We will often find that those things hold the key to real happiness. A child's laughter or them running over to us with the gift of a crumpled pine cone, a crisp autumnal day, a warm shower, listening to music; all those things which are so easy to take for granted can bring happiness and contentment when we stop and appreciate them.

Be sure to acknowledge your successes, no matter how small or unimportant you may think they are to others. They're a testament to your efforts and as such deserve recognition and acknowledgement. If you're working with a to-do list be sure to acknowledge all the additional things you do that are not on your list. Give yourself credit for those extras too.

A sense of achievement often comes when we've applied ourselves, worked hard and done our best. Even if something doesn't work out as well as we'd hoped that sense of accomplishment can bring its own reward, having tried, pushed ourselves and given it our best shot. We should smile and give ourselves a pat on the back for having had a go, and as such feel happy and proud of ourselves.

A positive attitude is an important element of being happy, where we appreciate what we have and are grateful for it. There is so much in life to be grateful for but we can often lose sight of the good fortune we have, especially if we're tempted to compare our lives to other people's in an unfavourable way. Remember that many people would feel blessed to be in our shoes.

Balance in life is also important. Constant partying and fun might seem like the dream, but if we ate cake all the time we'd end up bored, fat and not enjoying cake as much! Find a balance between work, responsibilities and 'me time'. Making an effort first often makes the reward of fun afterwards more meaningful and enjoyable.

Belonging, where we can be ourselves, perhaps as part of a group, makes a difference to our happiness levels. Knowing that we're accepted as we are, that we don't have to dress up, continually make an effort or pretend to be something we're not can really allow us to relax and feel happy. Being judged, watched or permanently under scrutiny is a familiar part of many people's everyday lives, so having places which are free from that burden is a big relief.

Being involved in charitable works and good acts can make us feel happy, having donated our time, skills or done something selfless. Doing good and helping others can bring a real sense of positivity into our lives, and it's often about the act itself, rather than any recognition we may receive.

Our comfort zone can be a happy place for a time, but it's important to leave it occasionally and explore further afield. Remember to accept opportunities and challenges that come your way, be prepared to scare yourself a little on a reasonably regular basis and avoid becoming too complacent, settled or comfortable.

Co-operating on a joint project or venture can bring much happiness and satisfaction into life. Think of a group of people tending a garden, volunteering or even sharing a commitment to exercise regularly or learn a new skill. It can be easier and more sustainable when we're working together, urging each other on, joking as we appreciate how much we've achieved.

Afterwards there's often a strong sense of camaraderie, of being part of a winning team, laughing at the failures, retelling anecdotes and in-jokes from the miscellany of adventures along the way, feeling happy at having been a part of the experience.

Whilst feeling happy may not be something we can necessarily choose for ourselves there are certainly many ways we can support ourselves and so become more comfortable and contented. It's often then that we smile and realise how happy we're feeling.

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Without Ego

When reading philosophical teachings and writings, I often wonder why the body and the ego are seen so negatively, as if they somehow are antithetical to spirituality. Although ego, body and mind are not all we are, each is part, an expression of the whole self, included in our precious gifts from God, the Universe, Life, Spirit. It would be as sensible to hate or degrade a mathematical problem given me by a teacher for learning purposes. Of course I can be frustrated in my efforts to solve a difficult problem; that is merely an expression of myeagerness to achieve. How much easier on me, however, to enjoy the puzzle, to marvel at my reasoning processes and their growth and development as I draw nearer, bit by bit, to the solution. Even so, frustrated or not, I learn.

There are those of us who love school, and those who hate it. Nevertheless, we are all in school. And the ego, the mind and the body are our major learning tools. Through them, we learn the concepts of attachment/detachment, freedom/responsibility, joy/pain, wisdom/ignorance. These concepts, once grasped and mastered, are our prerequisites for the next level of learning in which we are (perhaps) freed of body/ego and introduced to new tools.

If I reject my body, my ego, or my so-called negative emotions, I am rejecting myself. If I reject myself, I am rejecting a holy creation and gift. If I reject or denigrate integral parts of my self, then I am split, dysfunctional, not whole, and not comfortable in my body and with my sense of self. How much more joyful it is to regard my life as the finest Montessori School of all time, where the sandbox and mudpuddles offer learning experiences equally as rich and essential as do the books of poetry and lofty philosophy.

Without body:

We couldn't enjoy the many sensory and sensual experiences of this life

We wouldn't learn the invaluable lessons of getting obsessive about those experiences, and learning the self-control they teach us.

We would miss out on learning to love and cherish our brief moments on this planet, the fleeting nature of which is reflected back to us by the body's aging process.

We wouldn't be able to interact on a cellular level with the air, food, minerals, water, and the other beings, literally becoming one with the planet on a daily basis.

We would miss the powerful lessons we're learning right now, that if we pollute our environment, we pollute ourselves - physically, emotionally and spiritually.

We would not have the viceral (gut) experiences of the physical components of our emotion - the hormonally driven ecstasy and agony of emotional joy and pain.

We'd miss out on so much of artistic expression - dance, the musical beat that originally was born of heartbeat, sound, light, color, poetry, theater and all the rest of that exuberance.

Without ego:

We'd have no control over our emotions, and be battered around by them, like a ship in a stormy sea with no rudder.

We wouldn't be able to protect ourselves against others' emotions and feelings, and every little thing others said and did would cut us to the quick.

We wouldn't be able to make plans and follow through to reach goals

We couldn't keep ourselves going in a productive direction when obstacles come along

We'd have no sense of who we are, how we are the same or different from others, and we'd never learn the lessons of shared humanity.

As a psychologist, I seek to help people integrate all the components of ego, body, emotions, mind and spirit until they all work together in a healthy human way. Perfection is not the goal - healthy living is. When your body (with all its human flaws and imperfections) functions well, all its many cells, organs, hormones, fluids, muscles, bones, nerves and sinews cooperate and work together to help you experience and express your life. When your body, mind, spirit, emotions - and yes, your ego -- work together, spirit doesn't have to work against ego, ego doesn't have to work against spirit, and there's no internal fight - no struggle for supremacy, no inner denial or right/wrong battle. Each component does its part, and all work together to help you become the most shining example of who you are. That's what the old gospel song about "this little light of mine" and "inner light" or "inner spirit" means - when all of who we are works together, we are free to be the best of who we were born to be.

When I think of my body with all its billion miracles and exquisitely effective methods of expression both conscious and unconscious; with all its components of which I approve and those for which I have enough self-denial to disapprove - I am suddenly reminded to regard my whole self (body, mind, spirit, emotions, and ego ) with the awe,gratitude, and gentleness I deserve. I know I can count on all my component parts to help me through my lessons for when my body, my ego, or my feelings you insist I focus my attention I cannot deny them.

My Ego has a sharply focused viewpoint; boundless pride; a fine-tuned sensitivity to others' egos; and the ability to keep me focused: on my uniqueness (often auto-interpreted as weirdness); my responsibility to me; and my essential human aloneness. It is a precious, irreplaceable tool. When I can manage to see myself, not as a disparate collection of separate parts, but as an amazing, cohesive design of interconnected, finely designed components working smoothly together, I am filled with awe at the miracle of each one of us, myself included. When I stop trying to resist, resent, overpower, deny or ignore parts of myself, and instead seek to help the whole human package be the best I can be, I find myself as peaceful and joyful as I have ever been.

I sense that when the time cones to exchange my body/ego for new tools, I will feel bereaved. Let me not waste a moment of this opportunity to learn with such companions as I may not know again, my ego, my emotions, and my body!

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Why You're Not Able To Get The Life You Want By Manifesting Love With A Life Of Purpose

Do you know at least a single person that seems to make the best of a life situation even when it comes to manifesting real love?

I mean someone who has great success at manifesting abundance and the act of self-healing for a better life.

Or we may say, the act of understanding cause and effect as one, and the laws of the universe, through the direction of consciousness.

You might even have actually felt a little envious of the person since it appears they have everything, seemingly getting these things with very little effort as though they were born 'fortunate' or 'lucky.'.

Well, it is probably time you truly comprehend deeply that the power of manifestation lies within each of us and it depends on you to learn more about it.

Skills like making or playing a musical instrument, to gourmet meals, to improving a golf handicap, to so many other things of personal transformation, certainly does dedicate the time to his/her craft.

How great you get, depends on how well you discover the skill of manifesting love, and I mean, reflecting that inner love to the material world.

Some appear to have discovered it so well that they often times don't even understand how they do it.

It's through Real Love where Manifesting begins:

Manifesting abundance as a result of manifesting love now comes to them so readily it appears 'natural' just as a well-trained soloist or pianist appears to bring a sold out auditorium to tears without thought or effort.

They discover to think whole-heartedly that they simply deserve something; it is now part of their reality.

How can you start on your journey to manifesting excellent things for yourself and those you enjoy?

Here is the initial step-- a basic understanding of the 'Power of the Universe's Law of Manifestation'.

Getting a mutual understanding, perhaps through abundance meditation of how the "power of attraction" works is the first step to manifesting love and in turn bringing abundance into your life.

You can create the life you want as a reality you can call your own.

You can attract riches, wonderful ideas and opportunities along with joy, and so on, in your life when you learn to focus or attract yourself on them.

In order to do this, and for how to stay positive in any life situation, you must learn how to believe and think in a favorable right-minded way towards those things you seek and truly want in life.

The Course in Miracles states, "Now in the hands made gentle by His touch, the Holy Spirit lays a picture of a different you.".

You probably also know a minimum of someone (hopefully not you!), who harps on the negative wrong-minded aspects that are usually judgmental, and really will focus on having less with thoughts of lack.

They are drawn in to 'less' not 'having more'.

When you concentrate on "I hate my existing work," then you will never observe the elements of your employment that may be pleasing, and you'll never realize the power of manifesting love for a better life.

You should comprehend deeply that how to stay positive or just desiring something isn't going to bring that to you if you continue to focus on the 'not having,' or operating with a scarcity mindset, of that something.

You might have personally experienced that "not having lacking" attitude and learned that it obstructed your true desires, and thereby never have had the power of manifesting love turned into a great life situation.

Making the Best of your Life

Previously I discussed information on the internet like free e-books and other available content for making your dreams a reality.

The Course in Miracles states, "Yet only thus can you escape. The home of vengeance is not yours; the place you set aside to house your hate is not a prison, but an illusion of yourself.".

How can you make the best of life let alone dealing with adversity that as humans we will all have with us from time to time?

You need to learn to focus on a particular idea or scenario rather than on vague objectives like 'more money,' or 'winning the sweepstakes'.

Focusing on winning the Clearing House Sweepstakes or the Lottery, for example, is an unsuccessful event.

Unusually enough, lots of who focus on winning naturally dream of exactly what they could do to assist others, even though many of those dreams could actually be done with their existing incomes on a smaller scale, however they do not.

I understand several decently paid professionals that consistently inform me that they too would truly like to sponsor, for example a disabled child in another nation, and that if they win the lotto then they will do it.

If they were faced with an emergency situation, they are afraid that they can not presently manage a few dollars a day as that might leave them lacking money.

Their focus is on "lack" instead of being concentrated on sponsoring a needy child.

When they are concentrated on "a scarcity mindset" it won't ever matter how much cash they have, it will never suffice.

Just discussing sponsoring a kid brought their fears out into the open.

On the other hand if they were to focus on the idea of helping a deprived child not-at-all placing them in a bad situation, then their manifesting abundance becomes powerful.

Do you see what I mean about manifesting love?

What I would tell these folks who would like to sponsor a disabled or needy child but feel they just can not, is that a smile on the child's face will perhaps bring forth that child's own manifestation power.

This would be a positive life situation where manifesting abundance actually emerges where a child may make the best of what occurs in his/her world.

This exact same first step will work for all aspects of life from healthy, healing relationships to personal wealth, to natural weight-loss, to over-all fitness and well-being, and so much more.

Is it your turn to begin manifesting love and make the best of any life situation you are up against?

Is it your turn for others to see you as that 'lucky' guy or gal?

Does your absence of ability to begin manifesting abundance leave your soul wounded?

Would you want to find out all the steps to manifest life? You deserve it and it is time to act.

You can draw in riches, experience wealth creation, have opportunities pop up, and live a happy life, and so on, when you uncover the idea of manifesting love.

(Please note I also suggest seeking the web for more helpful content on chasing success, chasing destiny, to get the life you want Now filled with prosperity and abundance.)

To a life of passion and purpose!

https://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Youre-Not-Able-To-Get-The-Life-You-Want-By-Manifesting-Love-With-A-Life-Of-Purpose&id=9972400

Why Healing Your Inner Child, Helps You Discover Your True Self

Unconscious To Our Wounds

I'd like you to take a journey into yourself, as you read this article. Hopefully, in that time, you will gain a glimpse of why healing your inner child is not only essential but important to overcoming our problems as adults. Many people grow up in less than optimal family environments. Even if our childhood was ideal, we are likely to inherit trauma from generations before us. That is why alcoholics face an unfair disadvantage, since they inherit the genes of their alcoholic parents. We all have wounds to confront and the journey of becoming an adult involves retracing our childhood and making peace with our early life. Can you identify with this narrative? Did you grow up in a stable family environment or did you experience any childhood trauma?

The journey of becoming our true selves requires revisiting our childhood wounds and seeing them through the lens of compassion and forgiveness. It involves attending to our vulnerable parts that we have neglected. So why is this important for self-transformation and self-improvement? Many of our problems stem from our early development, according to developmental psychologists. Depending on our attachment style, this will figure dominantly in adulthood, if we haven't healed our inner child. This shows up when we are triggered in relationships and recall past hurts. Because we are unconscious to our wounds, we believe the pain is occurring now.

For example, if you are emotionally triggered and cannot control it, it may be a triggered event instead of a reaction to something taking place now. This sentiment is echoed by author Liz Mullinar in her book Heal For Life: How to Heal Yourself from the Pain of Childhood Trauma where she explains: "Remembering that a majority of all emotion comes from childhood, it is a really good idea to check whenever you are angry if it is about what is happening right now or is it reminding you of someone or something from your childhood." For instance, I had a strained relationship with my father growing up, owing to his stern disciplining. As an adult, I experienced anger I couldn't control and traced it back to my childhood. However, I ignored it until it affected my relationships.

Release The Negativity And Hurt From The Past

Have you experienced something similar whether it was anger, anxiety, shame or guilt? Often, we will carry the programming of our parents or caregivers into adulthood, if we haven't healed these aspects of ourselves. The trauma we experience in childhood is being triggered in the present moment. Psychologists believe trauma is located in the right hemisphere of the brain, in the unconscious centre. Therefore, to heal and transform our wounds, requires going to the source instead of using logic and reason. In my case, my childhood wounds were associated with fear, which shaped my anger as an adult. It required attending to my fears and transforming my beliefs as a child such as: "I am unsafe" and "It is not safe to be me." These days, my adult self knows I am safe; however, my inner child was still playing the tapes of fear, guilt and shame.

Most of our difficult emotions stem from our childhood. When we experience these emotions, we must notice whether we are being triggered by a childhood experience or something in the present moment. It is beyond this article to explain how to heal and transform our childhood wounds. Moreover, I invite you to work with a trained therapist or counsellor, if you identify with this message. It may be difficult working through our childhood wounds on our own because we are likely to re-traumatise ourselves and remain stuck in our wounds. The key is to take the journey into ourselves, knowing what we experience may be unpleasant, but in doing so, we release the negativity and hurt from the past. By healing our inner child, we discover our true self hidden behind a facade of the wounded self.

This wounded self masquerades as an archetype in the form of: victim, soldier, hero, etc. We will carry these archetypal wounds throughout life without knowing who we really are, since we have identified with our trauma for so long. It becomes our new identity, and healing can be difficult without a shift in awareness. We must learn to become who we really are and not the characters we play. Are you beginning to get a sense that who you are is an intricate web of personas buried within your unconscious mind? It can take a lifetime to discover our true self and we ought to be kind and compassionate with ourselves throughout the healing journey. If this is something you identify with, I recommend journaling and observing your emotions regularly. Note your predominant mood and the situations that affect you. Consider your difficult emotions, as signposts pointing you to heal your inner child. It is once we undertake the journey into our inner child, that we discover the essence of our true self, beneath the concealed self.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Healing-Your-Inner-Child,-Helps-You-Discover-Your-True-Self&id=10296124

Stockholm Syndrome and Addictions

To understand what a trauma bond is and how it applies to addiction, we will start with a brief lesson on the Stockholm syndrome.

Stockholm syndrome is a condition that causes hostages to develop a psychological alliance with their captors as a survival strategy during captivity.

These feelings, resulting from a bond formed between captor and captives during intimate time spent together, are generally considered irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims. Generally speaking, Stockholm syndrome consists of "strong emotional ties that develop between two persons where one person intermittently harasses, beats, threatens, abuses, or intimidates the other."

Formally named in 1973 when four hostages were taken during a bank robbery in Stockholm, Sweden, Stockholm syndrome is also commonly known as 'capture bonding'. The syndrome's title was developed when the victims of the Stockholm bank robbery defended their captors after being released and would not agree to testify in court against them. Stockholm syndrome's significance arises because it is based in a paradox, as captives' sentiments for their captors are the opposite of the fear and disdain an onlooker may expect to see as a result of trauma.

There are four key components that generally lead to the development of Stockholm syndrome:

1. A hostage's development of positive feelings towards their captor

2. No previous hostage-captor relationship

3. A refusal by hostages to cooperate with police forces and other government authorities

4. A hostage's belief in the humanity of their captor for the reason that when a victim holds the same values as the aggressor, they cease to be perceived as a threat.

So the important part to understand here is that even though the bond between captor and hostage seems illogical, there is a very logical reason behind it: survival and the need to bond.

The unfortunate experiments done on monkeys by Harlow illustrate the need to bond to survive. Baby monkeys were taken from their mothers at birth and given wood or metal "surrogate monkeys" covered with cloth to cling to. After a while, the baby monkeys saw these mannequins as "their mothers" and preferred them to live individuals. Then later when these babies grew up and had their own young, they had no idea how to parent and even threw their offspring against their cage and sometimes killed them. Yet, the little ones kept coming back to their mothers, preferring possible death to inevitable death and starvation if they were to stay away.

The way Stockholm syndrome is treated is through psychological counseling and the understanding that it was necessary to form an unhealthy bond in order to survive the trauma of captivity. It is a gradual shift in thinking, similar to healing from brainwashing. This does not absolve the victim from accountability but helps them break their unhealthy bond and cultivate new ones.

https://ezinearticles.com/?Stockholm-Syndrome-and-Addictions&id=9679803

Be Like Bamboo

Feeling stress and the need for a quick recharge? Feeling blocked, stuck in your ways and the desire to be more flexible and forgiving? Do you have the desire to undo the energy drain of the life and work, start the year or business anew? If yes, it's time to be like bamboo

Want to be strong without being tough? Finding the strength to lead from a place that does not drain your joy or energy? Be like the bamboo.

As entrepreneurs we spend much of our time working, thinking, and creating from a place of busyness. We spend most of our time in the doing, and very little time in a space of quiet - between all the doing. So much of what we do is on autopilot, focused on goals, and getting things done. This is the path to stress and burnout.

At times we get so caught up in the many little tasks we are managing that we lose sight of our original intention and passion. The tasks take over and the big picture begins to blur.

Often, we are piloted by busy versus peaceful or productive energy. The days fly by, blending into each other. We look up and we are tired or lost.

We are so set on achieving what we set out to do that we often forget to take breaks, celebrate our successes, and enjoy what we have created.

I love the seasons as teachers for leadership and self-care. In the spirit of Spring and the 5 elements, I look to wood as the element of the season. Bamboo, a wood element, is one of the most sustainable, easily renewable resources. When in use, it is one of the most efficient resources - as virtually every part makes a valuable contribution. It thrives without harmful additives, in a variety of conditions. Once planted, the roots remain in place.

This is an invitation in the form of a metaphor. It is also a chance to live into the practice of inviting art, movement and play into your life. Consider it an opportunity to practice visualization - allowing this vision to lead you on your path to peace and clarity. To be like bamboo.

Visioning is a way to just breathe and be. Movement is a way to access our deepest, most enduring self. Letting go of our minds and allowing our bodies to just sway and flow. Connect imagination to this movement and allow it to lead.

When things get tough, take a breath. Move more slowly and see yourself as bamboo. Allowing the Spring element of wood to help you balance your energy.

Feel rooted and light.

Sway and bend gently with the wind.

Strong yet flexible.

Growing tall to reach the clouds.

Able to survive in diverse spaces.

Nourishing.

Healing.

Easily renewed.

Creative. Expansive.

Beautiful in your natural simplicity.

Just be.

Like bamboo.

Namaste'

https://ezinearticles.com/?Be-Like-Bamboo&id=7514723