How to Control Anger and Rage - Understanding It All

Anger is a normal emotional response that we use to protect ourselves against perceived threats or slights.

Most people feel angry for one reason or another on a regular basis, and often that anger is justified. If you get treated poorly, you have every right to be mad about it.

When you are able to experience anger and then move on, you have nothing to worry about. When your anger tends to take over your emotions and control your actions, you probably have a problem with anger management.

If your anger turns to rage, and you put yourself and other people at risk, you really need to know how to control anger and rage.

Think about your lifestyle. If you build your life and your existence around your anger and the things that make you mad, you are setting yourself up for failure. You'll have a much better chance at controlling your anger if you create a life that is contrary to the negative emotions of displaced anger and rage.

Make your surroundings and your attitude so serene and peaceful that it would be impossible for anger to fit in. When you are able to achieve peace and relaxation outside of yourself, such as in your home or your work, you will be able to create inner peace as well.

Practice self control.

This really does take a lot of work. Some people channel all of their emotional activity into fitness, exercise, religion, meditation or art. When you learn how to control yourself, you will find you can use those tools to tame your anger as well.

Teach yourself what it means to capture a surging emotion and then re-direct it somewhere else. You will find this to be a very powerful tool in how to control anger and rage. Instead of acting on how you feel, you will be able to deal with it internally.

Figure out what triggers your anger.

Triggers are dangerous things, and they are usually responsible for our episodes of anger. You should be able to recognize what makes you mad or who makes you mad or what kind of situation or setting really turns your otherwise calm presence into a boiling of rage and anger.

Take note of when you begin to feel those angry emotions show up. Once you are able to identify your triggers, you can address them individually and learn how to either avoid them or manage them when they do show up.

Get comfortable with healthy emotional responses.

Your comfort level right now might be with screaming, yelling, arguing, defiance or physically fighting. Turning away from these responses will require that you learn to feel at ease with different responses.

Learn how to walk away from situations that might indulge your anger. Gather other tools in your emotional toolbox so you are able to handle yourself in any potentially negative situation.

Steady breathing, verbal communication, punching a pillow, visualizing a calm and happy place are all examples of healthy ways of dealing with your anger instead of flying into a rage.

Practice them so they don't seem so foreign or impossible to you.

Get some support from friends, family members, even professionals. The people you care about probably already know you have a bit of a problem, and they will be more than happy to help you work towards a healthy solution.

Talk out your feelings and frustrations with the people closest to you. Go to support groups or contribute to forums online. Work with a therapist if you need extra help and you're struggling to identify your anger triggers or how to get past them.

There are plenty of resources available to you.

Prepare yourself for setbacks.

Controlling your anger and rage will be something you need to do for the rest of your life. There is no quick and easy fix. You might do really well for a while and then something will set off a trigger, and you'll find yourself embroiled in a rage or starting a fight.

That's okay. You're going to have temporary setbacks, but if you can recognize them as setbacks and evaluate what went wrong and what you can do better next time, those disappointments can still be learning experiences.

Anger problems can ruin your life.

If you don't get a handle on your rage, you will have trouble with jobs, neighbors, family members and romantic relationships. Learn how to control anger and rage as soon as it shows up.

This will not be easy, but it will be rewarded. Learn how to create an environment of peace and calm, practice self control and understand what your anger triggers are.

Once you do that, you will be able to choose healthy ways to respond to your anger and you'll be able to live a happy, healthy and productive life.

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