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How To Escape When You're Feeling Helplessly Stuck And Depressed (By James Nussbaumer)


In previous articles I discussed being indicted by a grand jury over a foolish securities violation, and a warrant out for my arrest. And that I would be sentenced to 10 years in prison, and why staying calm under pressure when all hell breaks loose is so important.

Harboring the feeling of being trapped and unable to sleep that night, turning and tossing while the obvious was flooding my mind, I looked over to the bedside table to see the red, lighted numbers on the clock: 2 AM.

The full moon glowed and glistened over the calm, glasslike water, and soothed the feeling of being trapped. These dangerous types of feeling trapped anxiety thoughts ran through me.

Still gazing down at the lake, I continued to punish myself with guilt and the feeling of being trapped increased. It seemed as though they were aware of my presence and the feeling of being trapped.

The starry night was beautiful and warm, and was getting me through feeling depressed and stuck.

I put on my bathrobe and slippers to walk out into the yard and down the slope near the dock at the lake.

Even as they slowly streamed away, the ducks seemed to be looking back at me until they faded out of the darkness and into the glow of the moon.

I sat on the dew-soaked grass and continued to stare out over the lake, which was my friend for helping me how to escape. For years I had known this lake, and I 'd caught many fish here.

And many years earlier, back to the 1940s, my grandparents had owned property adjacent, where my mother had spent much of her childhood on the lake, fishing, swimming, and boating.

Thoughts like these and my memories of the lake were overshadowing my immediate pressures of feeling helpless, and I decided to lie down and gaze out into the starry moonlit sky until I dozed off.

The Course in Miracles asks us to answer this simple question: "Do I want the problem or do I want the answer?"

A catnap I would allow myself, hoping to rid the feeling of being trapped.

I entered into a dream that had only two characters, which were two different reflections of myself-- each with a different shape and size, as though seen through a carnival mirror.

The real me projected the feeling of being trapped as real and being thrown into a dungeon and sentenced to remain there for the rest of my life.

The dungeon was musty and dark, and the only time I saw anyone was once a day, when the other me, a massive unpleasant guard, opened the heavy steel door and placed a plate of food on the floor.

He then would shut the door and go away, intensifying the feeling of being trapped.

I made a decision to let go of the feeling of being trapped. When the guard opened the door I would attack him. I was better off dead than continuing with the feeling of being trapped forever in misery and darkness.

I reached over and braced myself against the door handle.

When I touched the door handle, something strange happened. The weight of my grip made the handle move, and the door cracked open.

I stepped forward and opened the door a little further.

The guard had a firm look on his face but stepped aside, as I, the prisoner, walked through the door and right out of the dark dungeon into the light.

There was nothing to it; that simply I was free of the feeling helplessly stuck and depressed.

To overcoming the feeling of being trapped!


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