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How to Build Confidence (By Christina Jay)

Confidence, easier said than done. You would be surprised how many successful individuals cannot make the leap to becoming an entrepreneurs due to confidence and self esteem. I recently read an article in the New Yorker stating,"The fundamental characteristics of entrepreneurs isn't risk taking; its self confidence." But not just any self confidence: an over the top, unreasonable, unrealistic, belief in your ability to prevail. It's interesting to note that many start ups and high growth entrepreneurship is mostly male. Women tend to be more realistic, more grounded, and more cautious.

In the business world, that can be a drawback. Women also tend to not have as much support in mentoring in business, there just doesn't seem to be as much camaraderie. We gals should stick together instead of hating! I personally go through the values an individual (male or female) believes they possess and make them more self aware and confident in their abilities. Also, if your familiar with coaching we go through "gremlins" they are made up of limiting beliefs, when we allow ourselves to disbelieve that we are capable of doing something.

Generally these thoughts are built up from years of experiences where we might have thought that we are not good enough at something, or that other people led us to believe that we are not living up to their expectations (parents, bosses, partners etc). This eventually leads us to actually believing that this is true, even when we know intellectually that it is not the case. Limiting beliefs eventually become nagging voices in our heads that stop us from achieving great things. I work with clients to manage their existence (limiting beliefs) and minimize their impact on one's success in life and business.

A coach will give you exercises (or "homework") to complete that will get to the root cause as to why one does not feel so confident in their endeavours. Usually, the exercise entails listing ones own values and core beliefs. Also, journaling can help to better understand our emotions and why one feels less confident in certain circumstances. By writing routinely you will get to know what makes you feel happy and confident. You will also become clear about situations and people who are toxic for you - important information for your emotional well-being. Keeping a journal allows you to track patterns, trends and behaviours and will help improve confidence over time.



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